02x25 - Sorry for Your Loss
Posted: 03/18/23 18:39
(male narrator)
Coming up..
Will Murr be forced to
swallow his pride?
[laughing]
Why is Joe out for revenge?
I'm ready to fight dirty.
I'm ready.
- You poked the wrong Italian.
- 'Let's do this.'
(male narrator)
And why will tonight's big
loser be extra sorry?
[laughing]
Today, we are at fairway market
clipping balloons onto
unsuspecting shoppers.
We're going head-to-head,
tournament-style
joker versus joker, balloon for
balloon, winner take all.
The goal is to keep attaching
balloons one at a time
to customers without getting
caught.
Whoever gets caught loses.
(Joe)
'And here they come, best buds.'
So, it's gonna be tit for tat
down there.
- Balloon for balloon.
- 'You get caught, you lose.'
(male narrator)
Round one.
Sal versus Murr.
- 'Here goes Murr.'
- 'Look at the guys looking.'
(Joe)
'Alright! Sal, you're up!
Sal, Sal, you're up.'
- 'Oh! Back to you, Murr!'
- 'He gets it! You're in, Murr!'
Back to you, Murr.
You got to get her, Murr.
You got to get her.
(Joe)
'Oh!'
(Q)
'She's getting away. Hurry up.'
Ah, I got caught in traffic.
[laughing]
You got balloon-blocked.
'You're not dead yet.
It's two out of three.'
Big blue, big blue, big blue.
'Turn around, Sal, big blue.'
- 'Oh! Oh, he's got..'
- 'Oh!'
(Joe)
The balloon hit him in the
head, and he didn't know!
[laughing]
'Oh,
this is interesting, though'
'cause Sal did not get caught.
Murr, you're up.
- 'Yeah.'
- 'Sal did not get caught.'
The thing is, Murray has to get
past him with the balloon
and him not notice.
- 'Here we go. Here we go.'
- 'Here we go.'
(Sal)
You know what?
I got to prepare now.
- 'Sal's preparing.'
- 'That's the secret.'
(Joe)
'You got to be ready with one in
the hand.'
It's about position.
(Q)
'Preparation is the key to
everything in life, Joe.'
'Go, Murray.
Here he goes! Here he goes!'
[laughing]
'Now you're just sidling up next
to him.'
Oh, you got caught!
Explain your way out of it!
- You're caught!
- That's awkward.
[ding]
(Q)
'Look at Sal!'
'Sal is victorious.'
'Sal's up.'
- 'Whoa.'
- 'Whoa!'
- Whoa!
- Whoa!
(Joe)
'Murr's in.'
(both)
'Whoa!'
- 'Two!'
- Back to Sal.
(both)
'Oh!'
She's starting to look like
the house from "Up."
[laughs]
[laughs]
- 'This is amazing!'
- 'Oh!'
- 'Oh, my God!'
- 'God!'
- Murr, your turn.
- Murr, you're up.
(Joe)
'She's engaged in conversation.
That's what the secret is.'
- 'Sal's going for a double!'
- 'Sal's going for a double.'
(both)
'Oh!'
(Q)
'You're out.
That's a victory for Murr.'
(Joe)
'There you go, Murr.'
[ding]
(male narrator)
Round two.
Joe versus Q.
(Murr)
'If you get caught putting a
balloon on somebody's shirt..'
...you lose.
Joe, how about this guy with the
NASA shirt?
'Oh, oh!
He's going for the shirtsleeve.'
(Sal)
'That's risky.'
[laughing]
[laughing]
I think Joe thinks he lost.
You got caught.
If that's the way you want to
play, buddy, let's fight dirty.
I'm ready to fight dirty.
I'm ready.
- You poked the wrong Italian.
- Let's do this.
Go ahead. You're up.
(Sal)
'You know what they say
about that.'
You awoke a sleeping Italian
that's awake.
Alright, guys,
I'm going way down.
(Murr)
'Sabotaged by Joe!'
Sorry about that.
Dropped that when you tried to
put the balloon on that lady.
- 'On that nice lady.'
- Q got caught attempting his.
- Yeah. That's it.
- So, he loses. That's a loss.
(Murr)
'Next one takes all.'
'Oh, my God!'
'Oh, my God!'
Has this woman not..
She's got a balloon on..
'Joe, Joe!'
'Got a balloon.'
I don't know what happened
with that, then.
- You got caught, buddy.
- You're holding the balloon.
I figured, you had one on
there already.
I might as well
put the second one.
- What's this guy doing?
- I don't know.
Joe!
(Murr)
'Joe goes down!'
- 'And Q moves on.'
- Nicely done.
(male narrator)
Final round.
Murr versus Q.
(Sal)
'Alright, it's winner takes
all right here, one round.'
First person to get caught
loses.
- Sudden death?
- Sudden death.
- 'Oh, he's on a bag.'
- 'Q, on a bag!'
(Sal)
'He's on a bag.
Q has got it on a bag, Murray.'
- And he's on, he's on, he's on.
- And it's on.
(Sal)
'It's in your court.'
'Oh, there you go.
Two.. She's in two.'
- 'Oh [bleep]'
- 'She's in two.'
(Sal)
'He's right back with a pinky.
Here.. Oh! Ah-ah!'
- He's not caught!
- Not caught!
- It's up to Murray!
- He's not caught.
- 'No, it's on.'
- 'Oh!'
(Sal)
'He's still there.'
- 'Yeah, he's got one.'
- Murray's got it.
Oh, Q answers back.
Five balloons,
she's gonna float away.
(Joe)
'Murr, it's up to you, buddy.'
'You better go. The second she
walks away, it's over.'
(Sal)
'Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.'
(Joe)
'Did he get it? Did he get it?'
[both laugh]
Floated away! Floated away!
And Murray's victory floats off
into the atmosphere.
[high-pitched voice]
And that's how I win!
That's how I win!
[ding]
(male narrator)
A totally deflating loss
lands Murr, Sal
and Joe on the loser board.
Today,
we're at Sam Ash music store
helping customers shop for
instruments.
While working on the Sales floor
we'll have to do and say
what the other guys tell us.
If you refuse to do or say
any of it, you lose.
[playing off-key]
Put your flute away.
- 'Joe, the guy by the piano.'
- 'What's up, man?'
Yeah, that's a sweet sound, man.
Play right over his shoulder.
[laughing]
'Right over his shoulder, Joe'
'like you're giving him
the Heimlich.'
[laughing]
Come on, Joe.
Get your arms around him.
- Yeah.
- Keep playing. Keep playing.
- Play right over him.
- That's how you do it.
[laughing]
- Yeah, I hear the difference.
- Dance behind him.
[laughing]
I never use it.
- Now, now it's got the funk.
- 'That's it.'
Joe,
start pointing to your crotch.
- I'll pick on that.
- Right.
[tempo quickens]
[laughing]
[laughing]
Yeah. That's good.
- Joe, get eye level with him.
- You got four of these guys.
Just look at him and say,
"You want to see a dead body?"
[laughing]
You, uh, real quick, though.
You want to, uh..
You want to see a dead body?
You want to scope out a dead
body?
[laughing]
[ding]
How can I help you out, sir?
You'd like to start playing the
harmonica.
(Joe)
'Murr, there's a harmonica on
the table.'
Look him in the eye..
- Say, "Watch this."
- Watch this.
Put the whole harmonica in
your mouth.
[laughing]
[laughing]
(Sal)
'Oh!'
[plays note]
[laughing]
Now give it to him to play.
Go ahead. Try.
[laughing]
Try it. It's not as hard
as you think. Try it.
- 'Try it. See how it feels.'
- It was just in his mouth.
(Q)
'Oh, my God!'
[theme music]
[plays note]
[laughing]
Now give it to him to play.
Go ahead. Try.
[laughing]
Try it.
It's not as hard as you think.
- 'Try it. Try it.'
- 'Don't do it!'
It was just in his mouth!
[plays note]
God!
[plays note]
- 'Oh!'
- 'Oh, my God.'
Now tell him, "Welcome to the
world of hepatitis."
[laughing]
Yeah! Say it! Say it!
I would like to welcome you
to the world of hepatitis.
[laughing]
[ding]
(Joe)
'You look the most like a
musician out of the four of us.'
You are k*lling that slide
whistle right now, man.
I just want someone to slip
on a banana peel
so I can be like..
[plays slide whistle]
[laughing]
Q, go up to someone with that
rain stick from behind
poke them to see if they need
help, with the rain stick.
(Joe)
'Got this girl on the left in
white.'
Do you need help with anything?
I'm fine. Thank you.
- If you need anything..
- You're the guy to see?
I'm the guy to see.
Yep, yeah.
- I'll keep it in mind.
- Keep it in mind.
[laughing]
(Sal)
'Q, the guy with the bongos.'
- Oh, you do music?
- Oh, you do music?
- Yeah.
- Cool, bro. I do music.
Mostly all of them.
I dabble a little bit in,
a little bit of everything.
Q, mispronounce every
instrument.
[laughing]
"Piamo."
I play a lot of piamo.
Real good with the "Saxobone."
[laughing]
I like to, I like to play "Bass"
every once in a while.
You know..
[imitates bass]
Let's jam out some bass.
[ding]
- 'There he is.'
- 'Nice shoes, dude.'
- 'Yeah, nice earring.'
- 'What's that?'
- I'm establishing credibility.
- 'What?!'
- As what?
- Yeah, I'm a musician.
I just, you know,
I'm eccentric like that.
- Oh, my God!
- Oh!
- God!
- What are you doing?
(Joe)
'Over there, the guy talking
at the pianos.'
'He's at the pianos.'
We brought in our friend Casey.
Who's gonna be assisting Sal
out on the floor.
- Unbeknownst to Sal.
- Right.
- He's gonna be giving him a..
- Confidence booster.
There's no pedal.
You know why fish don't make
good musicians?
Do you know why fish don't
play piano?
- I give up.
- 'Cause you can't "Tuna fish."
'Cause you can't "Tuna fish."
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
Alright, Sal, did you hear about
'that musician that got
arrested?'
Did you hear about that musician
that got arrested?
- She got in "Treble."
- She got in "Treble."
[rim sh*t]
- Cowboy hat, cowboy hat.
- How are you, sir?
(Q)
'Welcome to the drum section.
I'm gonna tell you to b*at it.'
I mean, you can hang out in the
drums for a little while longer
but after that,
I got to tell you to b*at it.
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
I saw this girl in here earlier,
she was really "Saxy."
This girl in here earlier..
She was so "Saxy."
[rim sh*t]
'She gave me a "Tromboner."'
[laughing]
She gave me a "Tromboner."
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
I don't work hard at it.
Trust me.
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
(Joe)
'What's better than roses on
your piano?'
What's better than roses on
your piano?
"Tulips" on your organ.
"Tulips" on your organ.
[laughing]
You guys are "Guitar-ted."
[ding]
(male narrator)
All the jokers hit
the right notes.
So, Murr, Sal, and Joe are tied
on the loser board.
Today, we're playing dress-up
out here in the park.
And we picked out a very
specific item of clothing
for each other to wear.
The goal is to get a compliment
on that item
without directly asking for it.
If you can't get a compliment,
you lose.
Wear your Sunday best, boys.
Joker vs. Joker challenge.
- Oh!
- Oh, snap!
(male narrator)
It's Sal and Murr in the
Joker vs. Joker challenge.
(Q)
'And there they are,
these boots.'
- 'Yeah.'
- Yeah, look good, man.
(Joe)
'Look at this guy.
Stretching out.'
'He's stretching out the
leather?'
Stretching out that leather!
'Yeah, peacock, baby.
Feeling great.'
You're rocking those boots, bro!
(Joe)
'The red ponytail.'
[laughs]
'Eyes to boot, just made
contact. Eyes to boot.'
(Murr)
'That's so weird.'
[laughing]
It's so hot today. I wasn't
expecting it to be this warm.
(Q)
She's looking at your boots,
though.
'She's looking at your boots.'
I would have dressed
differently.
- 'Uh-huh.'
- Those must be hot.
They must be what?
Containing a lot of your body
heat.
Heat, yeah.
I like the style
'but it's definitely not for
this type of weather.'
Does not like them.
She's doing the big nods,
but still doesn't like them.
But it's almost like some
days when I get dressed
it's like not even me putting
the stuff on myself.
Who's putting them on?
Sometimes you get influenced
by friends
and their styles and stuff.
Here, the buckle's here,
and you can kind of
cinch it tighter if you want.
All good, still don't like them.
So, these are my boots!
- Good for you. Yeah.
- Good for me?
Yeah. Well, I mean, I like them.
And that's the blankest look
I've ever seen anybody give
anybody in my entire life.
They're, uh..
You seem to be insecure
about them.
You seem to be fishing for
a compliment.
I mean,
do you enjoy wearing them?
- I do. I do.
- Then..
Yeah. I-I like 'em.
You know?
I like them.
Does someone not like them?
- 'I don't know.'
- I know you like them.
[laughing]
[theme music]
So, these are my boots!
[laughing]
- Good for you. Yeah.
- Good for me?
Yeah.
Well, I mean, I like 'em.
You seem to be insecure
about them.
[laughing]
You seem to be fishing
for a compliment.
I like 'em.
Does someone not like them?
- I don't know.
- I know you like them.
I would not wear them.
(all)
Oh!
- My boots should get walking.
- Your boots should get walking.
(Sal)
Yeah.
[buzzer]
[laughing]
(Q)
'There he is.'
(Joe)
'It's "Murray the kid."'
- Why am I wearing two things?
- 'Don't worry, bud.'
(Q)
'You only need a compliment on
the buckle.'
You know what?
If Murray gets a compliment
this is the kind of thing that
that'll become his new look.
'He's like, "Well,
people liked it, boys."'
'So, this guy right here
on your right?'
Well, hot-dog.
It's a hell of a day, huh?
- Yeah, it's nice.
- You from these parts?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
- Queens?
- 'Oh, yeah.'
I love how Murray's trying to
talk like a cowboy.
(Q)
'He's seen one cowboy movie
ten years ago.'
"Toy story."
[laughs]
(Q)
'What are you doing?'
You know, I just like to get a
little rhythm going, you know?
- Mm-hmm. What do you play?
- What's that?
- What do you play?
- You know, mostly this.
They got some nice belt
buckles around there.
Oh, yeah?
Over there they got them?
- Big ones.
- Big ones?
- Nice ones.
- Like mine?
- Yeah, bigger than that.
- Bigger than this?
'Cause that's kind of my thing.
- Your buckle's nice. Yeah.
- 'My buckle's nice?'
(all)
Aw!
- Take care, my man.
- 'You, too, brother.'
[ding]
(male narrator)
Sal gets the boot.
So, he's tonight's big loser.
Sal is our big loser
and the most apologetic
out of all of us.
So, today we're putting him
to the test with the..
(all)
"No apology" gauntlet!
(Q)
'You, my friend, are gonna
have to run the gauntlet'
stopping at these signs where
you'll find the awful tasks
that you have to do to people.
You can say anything you
want, except "I'm sorry."
I'm sorry I ever met you guys.
Let the gauntlet commence!
♪ Da da da da ♪♪
- 'Ready?'
- No apologies.
'Here we go.'
"Step on a person's foot."
That's something you
apologize for. "Oh, sorry."
- "Oh! Sorry."
- "I'm so sorry."
Of course you apologize.
This is America.
[laughing]
(Joe)
'This is extremely hard,
specifically for Sal.'
He apologizes for everything
in his life
just 'cause it's such a mess.
(Murr)
'Here he goes.'
How do you feel inside
right now?
Nervous, very, shaky at best.
Alright. Stop number two.
Okay.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
"Woof at a baby."
[imitates baby crying]
- Waah! Waah!
- Woof! Woof!
Which is to say that their baby
is less than stellar-looking.
- That's number two?
- We stepped it up.
- It's a "No apology" gauntlet.
- Oh, my God.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
He's getting it out now,
getting it all out.
'You're gonna need it for this
one, buddy.'
- You're welcome.
- Here we go.
- 'Woof, woof!'
- I can't.
You can't do it?
Come on. You have to do it.
Guys, I can't.
Sal, honestly, if you're
having this much problems
I don't know how you're gonna
get through
the rest of the gauntlet.
- 'There you go.'
- Oh. Hey!
(Q)
'Do it. Do it. Do it!'
[theme music]
- There he goes.
- There you go.
- Oh. Hey!
- Do it. Do it. Do it!
Woof.
[laughing]
- God!
- 'Oh, my God.'
(Joe)
'Yeah, that's it, man, woof.'
"No apology" gauntlet continues.
"Sneeze." Oh, God. Guys.
"Sneeze on someone."
[laughing]
How do you sneeze on someone
and not say you're sorry?
You got to do it.
You got to do it.
- Ah-choo!
- [bleep]
[laughing]
- 'Wow!'
- I can't do any more.
You're doing alright.
You only got two more.
"Blow an air horn.."
[laughing]
Right under the sign there,
there's an air horn.
[laughing]
[bleep] me.
I'm gonna get punched
in the face.
God, I-I hope so.
[laughs]
- 'Oh, my God!'
- 'Here he goes.'
- 'Get it. Get it. Get it.'
- 'Oh!'
air horn blows]
[laughing]
Oh, my God.
- 'You [bleep]'
- 'Wow!'
- 'He's not sorry.'
- 'Evil idiot!'
Alright, man. Only one more stop
on the train, buddy.
(Q)
'Here we go. Here we go.'
"Give an old woman the mid.."
[laughs]
"Give an old woman the middle
the finger."
Oh, my God!
You know what?
You guys are [bleep]
They deserve middle fingers,
too. Just 'cause they're old?
- What am I gonna do?
- I'll show you, buddy.
Look. It's this. That's-that's
it. There you go.
- You got it? Okay.
- Ooh, man.
I got, I mean,
the chills right now.
You get through this last
one, you're done!
'That's it, man.'
(Joe)
'Here she comes!
Here she comes!'
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- You got to do it.
- You got to do it.
Aaaahhhhh!
[laughing]
- Oh, man!
- You did it!
- 'You won, buddy.'
- 'Oh, my God!'
Not even I would do that!
That's somebody's grandmother,
you dope.
(Q)
'You don't give an old woman
the middle finger.'
[laughing]
Coming up..
Will Murr be forced to
swallow his pride?
[laughing]
Why is Joe out for revenge?
I'm ready to fight dirty.
I'm ready.
- You poked the wrong Italian.
- 'Let's do this.'
(male narrator)
And why will tonight's big
loser be extra sorry?
[laughing]
Today, we are at fairway market
clipping balloons onto
unsuspecting shoppers.
We're going head-to-head,
tournament-style
joker versus joker, balloon for
balloon, winner take all.
The goal is to keep attaching
balloons one at a time
to customers without getting
caught.
Whoever gets caught loses.
(Joe)
'And here they come, best buds.'
So, it's gonna be tit for tat
down there.
- Balloon for balloon.
- 'You get caught, you lose.'
(male narrator)
Round one.
Sal versus Murr.
- 'Here goes Murr.'
- 'Look at the guys looking.'
(Joe)
'Alright! Sal, you're up!
Sal, Sal, you're up.'
- 'Oh! Back to you, Murr!'
- 'He gets it! You're in, Murr!'
Back to you, Murr.
You got to get her, Murr.
You got to get her.
(Joe)
'Oh!'
(Q)
'She's getting away. Hurry up.'
Ah, I got caught in traffic.
[laughing]
You got balloon-blocked.
'You're not dead yet.
It's two out of three.'
Big blue, big blue, big blue.
'Turn around, Sal, big blue.'
- 'Oh! Oh, he's got..'
- 'Oh!'
(Joe)
The balloon hit him in the
head, and he didn't know!
[laughing]
'Oh,
this is interesting, though'
'cause Sal did not get caught.
Murr, you're up.
- 'Yeah.'
- 'Sal did not get caught.'
The thing is, Murray has to get
past him with the balloon
and him not notice.
- 'Here we go. Here we go.'
- 'Here we go.'
(Sal)
You know what?
I got to prepare now.
- 'Sal's preparing.'
- 'That's the secret.'
(Joe)
'You got to be ready with one in
the hand.'
It's about position.
(Q)
'Preparation is the key to
everything in life, Joe.'
'Go, Murray.
Here he goes! Here he goes!'
[laughing]
'Now you're just sidling up next
to him.'
Oh, you got caught!
Explain your way out of it!
- You're caught!
- That's awkward.
[ding]
(Q)
'Look at Sal!'
'Sal is victorious.'
'Sal's up.'
- 'Whoa.'
- 'Whoa!'
- Whoa!
- Whoa!
(Joe)
'Murr's in.'
(both)
'Whoa!'
- 'Two!'
- Back to Sal.
(both)
'Oh!'
She's starting to look like
the house from "Up."
[laughs]
[laughs]
- 'This is amazing!'
- 'Oh!'
- 'Oh, my God!'
- 'God!'
- Murr, your turn.
- Murr, you're up.
(Joe)
'She's engaged in conversation.
That's what the secret is.'
- 'Sal's going for a double!'
- 'Sal's going for a double.'
(both)
'Oh!'
(Q)
'You're out.
That's a victory for Murr.'
(Joe)
'There you go, Murr.'
[ding]
(male narrator)
Round two.
Joe versus Q.
(Murr)
'If you get caught putting a
balloon on somebody's shirt..'
...you lose.
Joe, how about this guy with the
NASA shirt?
'Oh, oh!
He's going for the shirtsleeve.'
(Sal)
'That's risky.'
[laughing]
[laughing]
I think Joe thinks he lost.
You got caught.
If that's the way you want to
play, buddy, let's fight dirty.
I'm ready to fight dirty.
I'm ready.
- You poked the wrong Italian.
- Let's do this.
Go ahead. You're up.
(Sal)
'You know what they say
about that.'
You awoke a sleeping Italian
that's awake.
Alright, guys,
I'm going way down.
(Murr)
'Sabotaged by Joe!'
Sorry about that.
Dropped that when you tried to
put the balloon on that lady.
- 'On that nice lady.'
- Q got caught attempting his.
- Yeah. That's it.
- So, he loses. That's a loss.
(Murr)
'Next one takes all.'
'Oh, my God!'
'Oh, my God!'
Has this woman not..
She's got a balloon on..
'Joe, Joe!'
'Got a balloon.'
I don't know what happened
with that, then.
- You got caught, buddy.
- You're holding the balloon.
I figured, you had one on
there already.
I might as well
put the second one.
- What's this guy doing?
- I don't know.
Joe!
(Murr)
'Joe goes down!'
- 'And Q moves on.'
- Nicely done.
(male narrator)
Final round.
Murr versus Q.
(Sal)
'Alright, it's winner takes
all right here, one round.'
First person to get caught
loses.
- Sudden death?
- Sudden death.
- 'Oh, he's on a bag.'
- 'Q, on a bag!'
(Sal)
'He's on a bag.
Q has got it on a bag, Murray.'
- And he's on, he's on, he's on.
- And it's on.
(Sal)
'It's in your court.'
'Oh, there you go.
Two.. She's in two.'
- 'Oh [bleep]'
- 'She's in two.'
(Sal)
'He's right back with a pinky.
Here.. Oh! Ah-ah!'
- He's not caught!
- Not caught!
- It's up to Murray!
- He's not caught.
- 'No, it's on.'
- 'Oh!'
(Sal)
'He's still there.'
- 'Yeah, he's got one.'
- Murray's got it.
Oh, Q answers back.
Five balloons,
she's gonna float away.
(Joe)
'Murr, it's up to you, buddy.'
'You better go. The second she
walks away, it's over.'
(Sal)
'Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.'
(Joe)
'Did he get it? Did he get it?'
[both laugh]
Floated away! Floated away!
And Murray's victory floats off
into the atmosphere.
[high-pitched voice]
And that's how I win!
That's how I win!
[ding]
(male narrator)
A totally deflating loss
lands Murr, Sal
and Joe on the loser board.
Today,
we're at Sam Ash music store
helping customers shop for
instruments.
While working on the Sales floor
we'll have to do and say
what the other guys tell us.
If you refuse to do or say
any of it, you lose.
[playing off-key]
Put your flute away.
- 'Joe, the guy by the piano.'
- 'What's up, man?'
Yeah, that's a sweet sound, man.
Play right over his shoulder.
[laughing]
'Right over his shoulder, Joe'
'like you're giving him
the Heimlich.'
[laughing]
Come on, Joe.
Get your arms around him.
- Yeah.
- Keep playing. Keep playing.
- Play right over him.
- That's how you do it.
[laughing]
- Yeah, I hear the difference.
- Dance behind him.
[laughing]
I never use it.
- Now, now it's got the funk.
- 'That's it.'
Joe,
start pointing to your crotch.
- I'll pick on that.
- Right.
[tempo quickens]
[laughing]
[laughing]
Yeah. That's good.
- Joe, get eye level with him.
- You got four of these guys.
Just look at him and say,
"You want to see a dead body?"
[laughing]
You, uh, real quick, though.
You want to, uh..
You want to see a dead body?
You want to scope out a dead
body?
[laughing]
[ding]
How can I help you out, sir?
You'd like to start playing the
harmonica.
(Joe)
'Murr, there's a harmonica on
the table.'
Look him in the eye..
- Say, "Watch this."
- Watch this.
Put the whole harmonica in
your mouth.
[laughing]
[laughing]
(Sal)
'Oh!'
[plays note]
[laughing]
Now give it to him to play.
Go ahead. Try.
[laughing]
Try it. It's not as hard
as you think. Try it.
- 'Try it. See how it feels.'
- It was just in his mouth.
(Q)
'Oh, my God!'
[theme music]
[plays note]
[laughing]
Now give it to him to play.
Go ahead. Try.
[laughing]
Try it.
It's not as hard as you think.
- 'Try it. Try it.'
- 'Don't do it!'
It was just in his mouth!
[plays note]
God!
[plays note]
- 'Oh!'
- 'Oh, my God.'
Now tell him, "Welcome to the
world of hepatitis."
[laughing]
Yeah! Say it! Say it!
I would like to welcome you
to the world of hepatitis.
[laughing]
[ding]
(Joe)
'You look the most like a
musician out of the four of us.'
You are k*lling that slide
whistle right now, man.
I just want someone to slip
on a banana peel
so I can be like..
[plays slide whistle]
[laughing]
Q, go up to someone with that
rain stick from behind
poke them to see if they need
help, with the rain stick.
(Joe)
'Got this girl on the left in
white.'
Do you need help with anything?
I'm fine. Thank you.
- If you need anything..
- You're the guy to see?
I'm the guy to see.
Yep, yeah.
- I'll keep it in mind.
- Keep it in mind.
[laughing]
(Sal)
'Q, the guy with the bongos.'
- Oh, you do music?
- Oh, you do music?
- Yeah.
- Cool, bro. I do music.
Mostly all of them.
I dabble a little bit in,
a little bit of everything.
Q, mispronounce every
instrument.
[laughing]
"Piamo."
I play a lot of piamo.
Real good with the "Saxobone."
[laughing]
I like to, I like to play "Bass"
every once in a while.
You know..
[imitates bass]
Let's jam out some bass.
[ding]
- 'There he is.'
- 'Nice shoes, dude.'
- 'Yeah, nice earring.'
- 'What's that?'
- I'm establishing credibility.
- 'What?!'
- As what?
- Yeah, I'm a musician.
I just, you know,
I'm eccentric like that.
- Oh, my God!
- Oh!
- God!
- What are you doing?
(Joe)
'Over there, the guy talking
at the pianos.'
'He's at the pianos.'
We brought in our friend Casey.
Who's gonna be assisting Sal
out on the floor.
- Unbeknownst to Sal.
- Right.
- He's gonna be giving him a..
- Confidence booster.
There's no pedal.
You know why fish don't make
good musicians?
Do you know why fish don't
play piano?
- I give up.
- 'Cause you can't "Tuna fish."
'Cause you can't "Tuna fish."
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
Alright, Sal, did you hear about
'that musician that got
arrested?'
Did you hear about that musician
that got arrested?
- She got in "Treble."
- She got in "Treble."
[rim sh*t]
- Cowboy hat, cowboy hat.
- How are you, sir?
(Q)
'Welcome to the drum section.
I'm gonna tell you to b*at it.'
I mean, you can hang out in the
drums for a little while longer
but after that,
I got to tell you to b*at it.
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
I saw this girl in here earlier,
she was really "Saxy."
This girl in here earlier..
She was so "Saxy."
[rim sh*t]
'She gave me a "Tromboner."'
[laughing]
She gave me a "Tromboner."
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
I don't work hard at it.
Trust me.
[rim sh*t]
[laughing]
(Joe)
'What's better than roses on
your piano?'
What's better than roses on
your piano?
"Tulips" on your organ.
"Tulips" on your organ.
[laughing]
You guys are "Guitar-ted."
[ding]
(male narrator)
All the jokers hit
the right notes.
So, Murr, Sal, and Joe are tied
on the loser board.
Today, we're playing dress-up
out here in the park.
And we picked out a very
specific item of clothing
for each other to wear.
The goal is to get a compliment
on that item
without directly asking for it.
If you can't get a compliment,
you lose.
Wear your Sunday best, boys.
Joker vs. Joker challenge.
- Oh!
- Oh, snap!
(male narrator)
It's Sal and Murr in the
Joker vs. Joker challenge.
(Q)
'And there they are,
these boots.'
- 'Yeah.'
- Yeah, look good, man.
(Joe)
'Look at this guy.
Stretching out.'
'He's stretching out the
leather?'
Stretching out that leather!
'Yeah, peacock, baby.
Feeling great.'
You're rocking those boots, bro!
(Joe)
'The red ponytail.'
[laughs]
'Eyes to boot, just made
contact. Eyes to boot.'
(Murr)
'That's so weird.'
[laughing]
It's so hot today. I wasn't
expecting it to be this warm.
(Q)
She's looking at your boots,
though.
'She's looking at your boots.'
I would have dressed
differently.
- 'Uh-huh.'
- Those must be hot.
They must be what?
Containing a lot of your body
heat.
Heat, yeah.
I like the style
'but it's definitely not for
this type of weather.'
Does not like them.
She's doing the big nods,
but still doesn't like them.
But it's almost like some
days when I get dressed
it's like not even me putting
the stuff on myself.
Who's putting them on?
Sometimes you get influenced
by friends
and their styles and stuff.
Here, the buckle's here,
and you can kind of
cinch it tighter if you want.
All good, still don't like them.
So, these are my boots!
- Good for you. Yeah.
- Good for me?
Yeah. Well, I mean, I like them.
And that's the blankest look
I've ever seen anybody give
anybody in my entire life.
They're, uh..
You seem to be insecure
about them.
You seem to be fishing for
a compliment.
I mean,
do you enjoy wearing them?
- I do. I do.
- Then..
Yeah. I-I like 'em.
You know?
I like them.
Does someone not like them?
- 'I don't know.'
- I know you like them.
[laughing]
[theme music]
So, these are my boots!
[laughing]
- Good for you. Yeah.
- Good for me?
Yeah.
Well, I mean, I like 'em.
You seem to be insecure
about them.
[laughing]
You seem to be fishing
for a compliment.
I like 'em.
Does someone not like them?
- I don't know.
- I know you like them.
I would not wear them.
(all)
Oh!
- My boots should get walking.
- Your boots should get walking.
(Sal)
Yeah.
[buzzer]
[laughing]
(Q)
'There he is.'
(Joe)
'It's "Murray the kid."'
- Why am I wearing two things?
- 'Don't worry, bud.'
(Q)
'You only need a compliment on
the buckle.'
You know what?
If Murray gets a compliment
this is the kind of thing that
that'll become his new look.
'He's like, "Well,
people liked it, boys."'
'So, this guy right here
on your right?'
Well, hot-dog.
It's a hell of a day, huh?
- Yeah, it's nice.
- You from these parts?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
- Queens?
- 'Oh, yeah.'
I love how Murray's trying to
talk like a cowboy.
(Q)
'He's seen one cowboy movie
ten years ago.'
"Toy story."
[laughs]
(Q)
'What are you doing?'
You know, I just like to get a
little rhythm going, you know?
- Mm-hmm. What do you play?
- What's that?
- What do you play?
- You know, mostly this.
They got some nice belt
buckles around there.
Oh, yeah?
Over there they got them?
- Big ones.
- Big ones?
- Nice ones.
- Like mine?
- Yeah, bigger than that.
- Bigger than this?
'Cause that's kind of my thing.
- Your buckle's nice. Yeah.
- 'My buckle's nice?'
(all)
Aw!
- Take care, my man.
- 'You, too, brother.'
[ding]
(male narrator)
Sal gets the boot.
So, he's tonight's big loser.
Sal is our big loser
and the most apologetic
out of all of us.
So, today we're putting him
to the test with the..
(all)
"No apology" gauntlet!
(Q)
'You, my friend, are gonna
have to run the gauntlet'
stopping at these signs where
you'll find the awful tasks
that you have to do to people.
You can say anything you
want, except "I'm sorry."
I'm sorry I ever met you guys.
Let the gauntlet commence!
♪ Da da da da ♪♪
- 'Ready?'
- No apologies.
'Here we go.'
"Step on a person's foot."
That's something you
apologize for. "Oh, sorry."
- "Oh! Sorry."
- "I'm so sorry."
Of course you apologize.
This is America.
[laughing]
(Joe)
'This is extremely hard,
specifically for Sal.'
He apologizes for everything
in his life
just 'cause it's such a mess.
(Murr)
'Here he goes.'
How do you feel inside
right now?
Nervous, very, shaky at best.
Alright. Stop number two.
Okay.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
"Woof at a baby."
[imitates baby crying]
- Waah! Waah!
- Woof! Woof!
Which is to say that their baby
is less than stellar-looking.
- That's number two?
- We stepped it up.
- It's a "No apology" gauntlet.
- Oh, my God.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
He's getting it out now,
getting it all out.
'You're gonna need it for this
one, buddy.'
- You're welcome.
- Here we go.
- 'Woof, woof!'
- I can't.
You can't do it?
Come on. You have to do it.
Guys, I can't.
Sal, honestly, if you're
having this much problems
I don't know how you're gonna
get through
the rest of the gauntlet.
- 'There you go.'
- Oh. Hey!
(Q)
'Do it. Do it. Do it!'
[theme music]
- There he goes.
- There you go.
- Oh. Hey!
- Do it. Do it. Do it!
Woof.
[laughing]
- God!
- 'Oh, my God.'
(Joe)
'Yeah, that's it, man, woof.'
"No apology" gauntlet continues.
"Sneeze." Oh, God. Guys.
"Sneeze on someone."
[laughing]
How do you sneeze on someone
and not say you're sorry?
You got to do it.
You got to do it.
- Ah-choo!
- [bleep]
[laughing]
- 'Wow!'
- I can't do any more.
You're doing alright.
You only got two more.
"Blow an air horn.."
[laughing]
Right under the sign there,
there's an air horn.
[laughing]
[bleep] me.
I'm gonna get punched
in the face.
God, I-I hope so.
[laughs]
- 'Oh, my God!'
- 'Here he goes.'
- 'Get it. Get it. Get it.'
- 'Oh!'
air horn blows]
[laughing]
Oh, my God.
- 'You [bleep]'
- 'Wow!'
- 'He's not sorry.'
- 'Evil idiot!'
Alright, man. Only one more stop
on the train, buddy.
(Q)
'Here we go. Here we go.'
"Give an old woman the mid.."
[laughs]
"Give an old woman the middle
the finger."
Oh, my God!
You know what?
You guys are [bleep]
They deserve middle fingers,
too. Just 'cause they're old?
- What am I gonna do?
- I'll show you, buddy.
Look. It's this. That's-that's
it. There you go.
- You got it? Okay.
- Ooh, man.
I got, I mean,
the chills right now.
You get through this last
one, you're done!
'That's it, man.'
(Joe)
'Here she comes!
Here she comes!'
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- You got to do it.
- You got to do it.
Aaaahhhhh!
[laughing]
- Oh, man!
- You did it!
- 'You won, buddy.'
- 'Oh, my God!'
Not even I would do that!
That's somebody's grandmother,
you dope.
(Q)
'You don't give an old woman
the middle finger.'
[laughing]