01x03 - Oh Kappa, My Kappa

[bunniefuu]

♪ when the morning comes ♪
♪ and I don't want to face the daylight ♪
♪ when the morning comes ♪

It's rude to stare, you know.

I'm sorry.

This is just so incredibly weird for me.

You have no idea.

Why weird?

Because you're the first person I've ever woken up next to that... isn't... dead.

Well, if it's any consolation, I can now officially say, they d*ed with a smile on their face.

Sorry. I shouldn't joke about that.

Are you okay?

It's hard to complain.

I'm healed in record time because of you.

Hey, would sex with any fae give me this big of a hit?

Well, I like to think that I bring a little something special to the table.

Oh.

Why, you gonna find out?

Not anytime soon.

Mm.

Forget me. How are you feeling?

Mm.

I just feel like I've run a very long, very dirty marathon.

♪... Into my life ♪

You certainly leave your mark on a man.

Well, I never said that I would be gentle.

Neither did I, as I recall.

I'm all healed.

Mission accomplished.

♪

So I guess you should probably go home or something.

I guess I could get some sleep.

I do still kind of have a headache.

Works for me.

♪ with wings outstretched ♪

Mmm.

Aah!

The life is hard when you don't who really are.

It's harder when you know what you are.

My love carries a death sentence.

I was lost for years.

Searching while hiding, only to find that I belong to a world hidden from humans.

I won't hide anymore.

I will live the life I choose.

Toothpaste?

Footlocker.

Thanks.

Okay.

Ahem.

♪ you're the sugar, I'm the spice ♪
♪ yeah, we fit, we fit real nice ♪

What?

Looks like somebody had an overnight guest, hmm?

A gentleman caller, if you will.

Will you just relax? You know he was just here to heal me.

Apparently he healed you all night long.

Can you just try to grow up for a second here, okay, and not make such a big deal out of this?

Totally. But if I was gonna make a big deal, like, how big are we talkin'?

Just... just ballpark me. Are we talk... just... what?

He's fae. I'm just asking for science.

Hey.

So I'm gonna head out.

Okay. Thanks again for last night.

Anytime.

Anytime.

Kenzi.

What the hell?

Right.

Uh, about that, I was...

"Need help? No one believes you?

"Bo's private investigation services, specializing in the strange and paranormal."

"10 years experience. Police references available."

You can't just lie about this sh*t.

In my defense, truth is for pussies.

Do you have any idea what kind of crackpots we're gonna get with this?

The kind who pay.

Kenzi, listen to me.

No, you listen.

We're not exactly cut out for day jobs, Bo.

I'm a thief, and you're not even human.

Hey, watch it.

Look, I know you'd rather be normal, but you're not.

You're a freak, and I dig that about you.

You know, you really need to learn when to stop talking.

Bo, you have skills that can help people... people that have nowhere else to turn, people with shiny, shiny money.

Is that really so terrible?

We already have people calling.

Just meet with one of them before you decide.

Okay?

One.

Yeah.

I... I have to be honest.

I can't afford to pay you very much.

All... all my money goes into Gina's education.

Define "all. "

Our rates are negotiable.

First, let's worry about whether we can help you.

If you can't, I don't know what else to do.

Gina hasn't been gone long enough for the cops to take me seriously. She's over 18, so the college is acting like I'm some smothering parent.

Well, no offense, but how do we know you're not?

Are there any signs of foul play?

She just disappeared, okay, in the middle of the night.

She hasn't been to her room.

She hasn't answered her cell phone.

She missed an exam this morning, and yesterday was my birthday, and she never called.

Okay, n... none of that is like my daughter.

But it is like a teenager.

Gina has wanted to be in a sorority ever since she was a little girl.

Initiation is in two days, and last time we talked, she was counting the minutes.

She never would've left before then, not willingly.

Mrs. Ames, this doesn't really prove anything.

Look, a mother knows when her child is in trouble.

Please help me find mine.

What do you think?

I don't know, dude.

I started running away when I was 10.

Sometimes people just don't wanna be found.

Well, it doesn't sound like Gina had much to run from.

Says her mom.

This girl could be pregnant, flunking out, or on dr*gs.

I know I'd have to be trippin' to join a sorority.

Still, I know how shitty it feels looking for family that nobody will help you find.

It can't hurt to look into it.

We can start with what the cops know.

Any one cop in particular or...

Why are you being so weird about this?

We had sex. It doesn't have to mean anything more.

Sex doesn't... but sleeping over usually does.

So you go grill officer your boyfriend, and I'll go see what I can find out on my own.

So you're, uh, a P.I. now, huh?

Yeah, it's part of Kenzi's grand plan to commodify my freakhood.

That girl worries me.

It's not the worst idea, though... taking freelance work when we need some scratch.

Well, you wouldn't have to if you pledged yourself to the fae.

You'd be cared for.

The ash would find you a human job that also protected fae interests.

Like yours.

Membership has its privileges, huh?

Something like that.

Yeah, well, so does freedom.

So no missing persons reports filed by the campus police.

I did a quick check of the, uh, the cold files here, but nothing helpful here either.

What about your spooky files?

My what?

You know, fae crimes that you guys have covered up.

I mean, that is pretty much the point of your day job, isn't it... making sure that none of the fae stuff get into these records?

I don't know what you're talking about...

Which is why... you did not get this from me.

It's all I could find on Locksley College.

This is ten years old.

Yeah, it's before my time here. This one stood out.

Freshman girl disappeared winter semester.

Body was unearthed during campus construction.

It was hollow.

You mean she was disemboweled?

No. I mean she was hollow.

No internal organs.

No incisions.

It's as if her insides were completely sucked out.

Gross. So definitely a fae k*ll then, huh?

Well, whoever the k*ller was either left town or got better at covering up his tracks, 'cause it's the only body we found.

No other missing students over the years?

No more than a usual campus.

Look, colleges are a transient community by nature.

If you target the right victim, it's possible that no one will report them gone.

Well, I can't find out anything more from here.

I'll have to get the inside, which is why I will need just one more itty-bitty favor.

And how do you propose we start paying off these favors?

I think we can figure it out.

No, don't cancel the card yet, but meanwhile, if there's any purchasing, can you maybe alert me?

Thanks so much.

Hey, chica.

Yo.

What's the word?

Well, I am starting to think there may be more to this missing persons case.

Oh, yeah? Why is that?

Got her mom's permission to check her financials, and Gina's not just ignoring her mom.

No action on her debit or credit.

Ditto on her data and cell plan since Monday.

So no shopping, no texting, no talking in 48 hours.

Which makes her either dead or over 40.

Well, let's hope for something in between.

What's all that sh*t?

I'm going undercover at Gina's school.

Dyson got me in as campus security.

Oh! Me, too?

Sort of.

Wait. What kind of security guard wears pink?

Oh, no.

I hate you long time.

Are you really gonna make me do this?

Like you haven't done worse?

What is the problem?

I can handle scary monsters, okay, but privilege creeps me out.

Well, this is the gig, so suck it up.

I better get danger pay.

This is bad for my soul.

Kappa theta xi.

According to her mom, Gina spent her final days here.

You need to get in there and find out what they know.

You sure you worked a solid cover?

Please. I've grifted "made" guys.

I think I can con a few muffys... if I must.

Oh, you must.

And look on the bright side.

I mean, maybe you were right the first time.

Maybe Gina's just playing hooky and this whole thing will be over soon.

Hello?

Aah! Aah!

Help!

Somebody help!

You have much security work under your belt?

Some. Mostly private.

Yeah, I worked that angle for a bit.

Good money, but this is a whole nother kitten to kick.

Never gets stale.

So how long have you been here?

Uh, longer than I care to remember, let's just put it that way.

I can tell you anything you want to know about this place.

Great. Any gossip on the latest crimes?

What kind of action am I looking at?

Plenty, if you ask me.

Higher education attracts a certain kind of person...

Spoiled brats, commies, and, uh, wise-asses.

Well, they don't look so scary. Well, leave it to me.

Don't let the pretty people fool you.

This can be a pretty dangerous gig.

If you run into any trouble, don't forget your holy trinity...

Taser, your pepper spray, your flashlight.

Together, they'll get you out of just about anything, okay?

Hey, why are you taking that down?

Policy. Until the police alert us officially, the school doesn't like us "instigating panic" every time some kid is late for a class.

You're kidding.

It's pretty tough, huh?

I feel for the parents, though.

Fortunately, almost always these kids show up in a week or so after some bender, no worse for wear.

Well, still, shouldn't we be putting together a detail or questioning students?

Ask Dean Peretti.

90% of this job is keeping her happy.

Hey, Marty!

Folks, Our founders may have built on faulty ground, but our alumni are rock solid.

Their generosity with our reconstruction campaign ensures Locksley will be here for decades to come.

Here's to more Locksley success.

Thank you.

All right!

Whoo!

So why are you starting classes so late?

My folks just got transferred, and I wanted to be closer to them.

Well, I can't tell you how perfect your timing is.

We have a sudden opening in our pledge class, so we're always thrilled to meet a kappa legacy.

Where was your mom a kappa?

My grandmother, actually.

Long time ago.

Poor memaw had five boys, and her dying wish was that I continue the kappa tradition.

Aw, sweet.

Then I'm sure you must know the legacy handshake.

Of course.

Mm-hmm.

You west coast girls are hilarious.

Now... you understand that we only take girls of the highest caliber and who've been vetted through rush.

Mm-hmm.

But given recent circumstances and your pedigree... let's all welcome our newest pledge!

Whoo!

Oh, there's hugging.

Robert, where the hell is my 10:00?

I think that might be me.

I'm the newest member of your security team.

I just thought I'd introduce myself.

Really? Why?

I hear there could be a missing student.

I'm volunteering to set up an investigation.

Well, I admire your ambition, but not its direction.

Until I hear otherwise from the police, it's wasted resources.

Your student's safety is wasted resources?

May I be frank, professional to professional?

Your job isn't just protecting students.

It's protecting the school's reputation.

It's hard enough squeezing out donations in this economy without toxic rumors frightening them off.

My lips are already chapped from all the behind I've had to kiss.

Well...

Ohh.

What if I gave you something better to kiss?

Do you have any, uh, secrets that you'd want to share in exchange?

Like what?

Like anything on that missing student?

I can't say.

Except...

What some drunken frat boy said he saw.

He said... she took off running towards the woods that night.

Anything else?

Don't hold out on me now.

Dean Peretti, here are the files you req...

Knock, damn it!

Out!

No, no. Not you.

Some other time.

Get me human resources.

I don't want to brag, but we basically have the best house on campus.

What's with the wall of fame?

Our founders and sisters have gone on to bigger things, and they're super generous.

Wait until you try our chef's food.

Chef?

We have a chef?

Ta-da!

You like?

I love!

I know, right? Too sweet.

That one's Tasha's... and Remy's... and you can have this bed.

The last girl that stayed here didn't seem to want it.

You know, I'm not the type to gossip, but I heard she just ran off one night.

Are you worried about her?

Try livid.

You know, lots of kids flake out first year, but we lost top girls to other houses holding a spot for Gina.

If she wasn't committed to kappa, she never should've rushed!

But... we wish her well, and now here you are, our silver lining.

That's me!

Let me at least get her crap out of the way, so you can start fresh.

Oh, don't worry about it. Let me take that to security.

It is the very least that I can do to thank my new sisters.

See? Helpful.

You are totally kappa material.

Thanks.

Thanks. Bye.

Hey, what's up?

Good news is, I'm still alive.

The bad news is, b*tches be crazy.

Oh, yeah? Why is that?

First of all, nobody not evil can be so chipper.

And second, these girls do not take rejection well.

You'd think Gina stood them up for prom instead of going missing.

So I take it you're in then?

So far, so good.

I even have a box of Gina's old stuff that she left behind.

Nothing earth-shattering yet, just a bunch of homework and hair products.

Okay, well, keep looking.

Can you get a peek at the rest of the house?

Mm... not without the muffy mafia seeing me.

Maybe tonight.

We're having some kind of lame "girls' night in" deal I could sneak out of.

Oh. Will there be pillow fights?

Please tell me there will be pillow fights.

Gross. You perv. How's your end coming?

Not sure yet. Something hinky about the Dean maybe.

I'm gonna take a look around her office tonight, so wish me luck, and, Kenzi...

Mm-hmm?

Stop stealing sh*t.

Now that just plain hurts.

Chug, chug, chug, chug! Whoo!

Whoo!

♪ I've got the new style, uh-oh ♪
♪ and I'm walkin' right down your street ♪
♪ I'm on your speed dial ♪

Whoo!

All right, who's next, b*tches?

I'm up! Yeah!

Whoo!

Okay.

Chug, chug, chug, chug!

Go, Kenzi! Go, Kenzi!

♪ 'cause you're smarter, better, no, the best ♪
♪ just look at me ♪
♪ I'm a leader ♪
♪ I'm a winner and I'm cleaner ♪

Whoo!

Is that a wig? Why are you wearing a wig?

Psoriasis.

God, Libra. Insensitive much?

♪ that's right ♪

My turn.

Whoo!

I'm gonna... go adjust myself and such.

♪ well, I'm a certified prodigy ♪

Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!

♪ I'm gonna bring you to your knees ♪

What are you doing down here?

I...

Looking for the bathroom.

I have a bashful bladder.

Basement's off-limits. Actives only. You know that.

So get your cute butt back up here and come party with us!

Whoo! Yeah!

Whoo!

Jeez.

What are you doing here?

Are you drunk?

I will have you know, I am in character.

Also... tipsy.

Yeah, well, you look like you're canvassing for the young conservatives.

Please tell me you found something so we can ditch this gig and head home.

The all-day smiling is k*lling me.

Nothing yet, but I don't really know what I'm looking for.

Anything with the kappas?

They definitely have something in their basement they don't want peeped.

They lock it up whenever they aren't in there.

I know this chippie.

Peretti? Yeah, she's the Dean.

She's also a kappa... or was.

They have her picture up at the house.

Oh. You're sure?

Yeah.

Oh, sh*t. Patrol's early. Come on. Hide.

Jesus!

Ew.

Well... this was pointless.

Maybe not.

Taped under the desk.

I almost missed it.

What is it, some kind of code?

Hang on.

That's not code. Those are student number I.D.s.

Can you use those numbers to get me their names?

I can try.

I still don't get why she would tape it under her desk.

Well, I have no idea, but if it's worth hiding, it's definitely worth finding out. Come on. Let's go.

Hey. What you got there?

Hey. Wayne, hey.

Kinda early for your shift, aren't ya?

Yeah. I was just, uh, just enjoying some of the school resources.

Just personal stuff.

So you wanna hear some gossip?

Someone tried breaking in to the Dean's office last night.

Busted a drawer and everything.

Uh, they know who?

No, but we're doubling our sweeps and logging extra shifts, so enjoy your personal time while you got it.

Told you this place was exciting.

We need to talk.

Yes, ma'am.

You look like hell.

I look like college.

For preppies, those girls can hang.

Turns out "girls' night" was code for "drink until your lips fall off and you start over-sharing."

I think I touched a boob.

Hey, you cr*ck those student numbers for me?

Yeah. I had to bribe some kid at the registrar's.

What's with the paperwork?

Oh. I played a hunch. Check this out.

I've been wondering about all the construction repairs on campus and that sinkhole that I found.

Mm.

It turns out, there are a bunch of caves from an underground stream right under the school.

Go on.

Looks like some of the old tunnels lead right to a few of the buildings, including kappa house.

I'm just not sure how it all ties together yet.

We may not have time to figure it all out.

It's our kappa initiation tonight, right in our basement.

Dude, if they're doing something nasty down there, I'm headin' smack for it.

sh*t.

Yeah.

Dyson.

I'll have him trace the names.

Look, find out what you can about tonight, and we'll make a final plan, okay?

Mm-hmm.

Be careful.

Did you compromise your cover?

I don't think so. Why?

The Dean did a background check on your references today.

I handled it, but it could've gone badly.

I must be pushing her buttons.

Good. Anything on those names?

All past students at Locksley, all unaccounted for.

Well, why didn't we know about them earlier?

Because none of the disappearances were linked to Locksley.

They either left a su1c1de note, or their cars were found far from the campus, that sort of thing.

Like somebody was trying to cover their tracks.

Well, if Peretti did take them, I have a pretty good guess where.

There are old tunnels underneath the campus.

One of them leads directly to kappa house.

Kappa house?

Yeah. Why?

Probably nothing.

It's just a... it's just a thought.

Here you go.

Thank you.

My name's Kala, by the way. I'm new here.

Pleasure.

Could you give us a moment, please?

Ah.

So that's your fae power, huh?

Chick magnet.

Seriously, what kind of fae are you anyway?

Or can't I ask?

It's a pretty intimate question in our culture.

Lets the other person know your specific weaknesses.

Well, I already know about the spot above your hip.

I should get back.

Well, it doesn't look like there may be a fae connection here.

What, is this the part where you tell me to drop it?

No, but since I set up your cover, I'd appreciate if you checked in with me tonight...

Mm. Just to let me know you're okay.

I can do that.

Good.

Yeah.

And there is one more thing that I can do for you.

Head rush.

Well, if you're going out solo, the least I can do is give you a top up.

Damn, you do not suck at that.

I'll call you tonight... to check in.

Before 8:00, please.

I have a life.

Give me a hand with these.

Look, I know what you're gonna say.

It's not a problem.

Then you don't know what I'm gonna say.

I think this is great.

Really?

Of course not.

What are you thinking?

She needed healing, Trick.

That's not what I saw. You're my eyes, Dyson.

I need you to stay objective.

I am.

Then keep your guard up with Bo.

We don't know if we can trust her yet.

How many hoops does she have to jump through, huh?

We know more about her than she does.

And how do you think she's gonna react to that betrayal when she finds out the guy she's sleeping with is lying to her?

Especially if you let her develop feelings for you by then.

"Let" her?

Are we talking about the same woman here?

Dyson, it could be enough to turn her from us.

She wouldn't be the first to join the dark for revenge.

Look, I'm sorry.

Things are complicated enough as it is.

You know the stakes. We can't afford an emotional attachment, for Bo's sake as much as ours.

Assuming I agree with you, what would you have me do?

Whatever it takes.

Just end it.

So what's the plan?

Well, there's an entrance near these running paths, near the old sinkhole that I found.

I'll go in from there, and we'll pinch this thing from both sides.

You from underground, me from above. Got it.

Do not go into that basement until you get the signal that I'm there, okay?

We don't know what they have planned.

Trust me, I'm no hero.

*

This one's on me.

Thanks.

You look like you're hard at work.

Yeah.

Okay.

Uh, hey.

What did you say your name was again?

It's Kala.

Hi, Kala.

What the hell?

It's time.

This doorway is a portal.

We stand here as pledges. You enter and become kappa.

Come on, Bo. Come on.

Pledge...

You may enter.

What, me? Now?

I'm not ready yet.

Open the door.

I changed my mind.

You know, I am really more of a theta.

Surprise!

Congratulations. You're now full-fledged kappas.

*

Kappa!

When does the k*lling start?

Kenzi.

Bo, we screwed up somewhere. It's not the kappas.

Well, I don't know what the hell's going on, but I'm heading back to interrogate the Dean. You're okay, though?

Uhh!

Bo?

Bo, are you there? Bo?

I hope you're not dead, girlie, 'cause he likes 'em with some fight.

Bo?

Are you there, Bo?

Bo, you are late. I was starting to worry.

Kenzi. Kenzi, slow down.

Last I heard, Bo was heading here.

Where?

This door.

Well, she's not gonna be much help.

Now how the hell are we supposed to find Bo?

Those tunnels run for miles.

New plan. Come on.

I didn't wanna underestimate you.

Professional courtesy and all.

Thanks.

I'm touched.

Gina!

Gina, are you okay?

Oh, she's fine. She's fine.

Yeah.

Maybe a little dehydrated, but that's the way he likes 'em.

Easier to, um... get out all the good stuff.

But you'll learn about that soon enough.

"He" who?

Is someone else coming, huh?

You not man enough to fight me yourself?

I'm not the violent type, no, unlike my hungry friend down there.

Me? Well, I just like to watch.

So what, you... you hunt these girls down and feed them to your swampy little friend?

Is that how this works?

Pretty much. I got no complaints.

Why? What's in it for you, Wayne?

Vitality.

All the freshness he drains from the girls ends up in this water.

Mmm.

I've barely aged a day since I found him starving down here in '42.

You know, you wanna know the truth?

The God's honest truth?

You know, I haven't even told my therapist this.

That I would do it all just to see these privileged b*tches scream.

Don't you touch her.

And I'm not exactly privileged, genius.

No, you are a snoop, like Peretti.

Peretti started putting the pieces together, thought that you would, too, worried that you would blab and ruin this school's precious reputation.

She actually ordered that these caves were to be sealed, "just in case. "

Well, that didn't end too well for her, did it?

Dinnertime.

Well, I really wish I could stay here and watch.

I really do. But...

I got another mess to clean up.

Gina?

Hey, it's gonna be okay.

It's coming!

Hang on, Gina. Hang on.

Bo's still not answering her phone.

How do we even know where we're going?

Wait. Let me focus.

What the hell are you doing?!

The trail's mixed with someone else's.

I can't follow the scent like this.

Listen, if this thing is fae, I have an idea what kind.

You gotta tell Bo.

This thing's gonna have a head like a teapot.

You tell her to knock the top off.

Why can't you tell her?

Holy sh*t balls!

That was awesome!

Aah! Aah!

Your mom sent me, Gina. I'm gonna get you out of here, okay?

But we gotta move fast. Can you walk?

I think so.

Aah!

Here... boy.

Yoo-hoo!

I have... treats?

Oh! Uhh!

Uhh!

Is he dead?

Yeah, it's dead.

Gina!

Thank you so, so much!

Okay, let's get you home.

And why are you half-naked?

Can I tell her? Let me tell her. Come on. Let me tell her!

Kenzi, all right.

Let's go.

Bo Nobody's home.

Check it.

Ugh. A face I never wanna see again.

Turn.

Dyson sent it. It's called a kappa.

Some kind of Japanese fae. Poetic, huh?

Not up close.

What about Wayne and Gina?

Mr. Dyson says they'll be pinning everything on Wayne, and they'll pull some kind of fae hoodoo to convince Gina that he was working alone.

Now... can we talk about the elephant in the room?

And by elephant, I mean "sexy, sexy wolf man."

What about him?

"A," he's awesome, and "b, " you lurv him.

Oh, by the way, I totally saw his wolf junk. High five!

Okay, what is the matter with you?

I'm just happy for you.

You know, most love lives don't include a body count.

You're kinda due for some happy.

And seeing as he's saved your life, like, twice this last week, I'd say Dyson's one of the good ones.

He is pretty great.

Aah! I knew it! I knew it! I knew you loved him! Ohh!

I don't know.

God, this is ridiculous.

I feel like a teenager. You tell me... what do I do next?

I'd say next, you tell him.

k*lling people is so much easier.

*

Hey. Is Dyson still here?

He's in the back.

Bo, wait.

Hang on.

Are you okay?

Yeah. Great.

I was just thinking that maybe we could hang out tonight or something.

I could thank you properly.

Guess you're busy.

Bo, about the other night...

I am always there for you like that when you need to be healed.

But that's all it was.

That's all it can be.

I'm sorry. I thought we were clear on that.

I think you know that we weren't.

But it's fine.

We're definitely clear now.