03x17 - A Good Run of Bad Luck

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Hart of Dixie". Aired: September 2011 to March 2015.*
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After graduating top of her class from medical school, New Yorker and new doctor accepts an offer from a stranger to work in his medical practice in small-town Bluebell on the Alabama coast. She arrives to find he has d*ed and left half the practice to her in his will.
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03x17 - A Good Run of Bad Luck

Post by bunniefuu »

Warner Brothers bought my book for six figures.

The movie's fast-tracked.

We're going to London in July.

Zoe: Opportunities arise, and he says that he's coming back, but we know that he's not.

Shelby is selling Fancie's and I intend on buying it.

You want me to purchase Fancie's in my name, sell you half and be your business partner.

She's driving me crazy! He's driving me crazy!

I so told you that working together was a bad idea.

It's like, everything that I tolerated about you for the past 15 years just started to drive me insane again, like how stubborn you are.

Oh! How stubborn I am?

Yeah!

♪ ♪

Joel.

♪ ♪

(laughing)

(sighs)

(laughs)

What are you doing? What are you doing?

(car horn honking)

♪ ♪

(breathing heavily)

Oh, boy...

George!

Lemon.

Both: Hi. Um...

You know, we-- uh, we should probably talk.

Yeah, we should, we need...

Um, uh...

Uh...

Um, I-- did you pay the, the fish vendor yet?

Oh. Oh. Yes.

I was gonna go do that now.

(laughs)

Okay, good. Yeah.

Great. Okay.

I'll just-- good.

See you later.

Bye, actually...

Oh. Well...

Have a good-- have a great day.

Joel's mug.

(sighs)

Yeah... it's pathetic, I know.

I'm so sorry, Z.

Believe me, I-I get how hard this must be on you.

I just... why can't I ever have a relationship that lasts for once?

I don't know.

I mean, look at my romantic history since I moved here: George had a fiancé.

Wade-- well, we know what he did.

And then Joel sold his stupid book to Hollywood and moved away.

Yeah, but I'm not sure it's luck so much as bad circumstances... and maybe imperfect relationships.

No, Joel and I would have been together forever if he hadn't sold that stupid book.

Which he did, because I have terrible, bad, bad luck.

And it's a good book, mostly, because of my bad luck, though.

(sighs)

(sighs)

See? It's like I'm cursed.

(video game whirring)

Can I ask you a question?

Yeah... Yeah. Go ahead, hit me.

Say the biggest jerk in school, Bobby Webster, wants to borrow your lunch money...

Okay, um, Harley, would you excuse us for a second? Come on.

Hold that thought.

All right, bud?

What's up?

(moaning)

Hmm, well, what was that for?

That was Charles on the phone.

He's gonna be at Aunt Winifred's barbecue tomorrow and he wants to meet you.

So... like, Prince Charles, Charles Barkley, or Charles as in your ex-husband Charles?

I know, it's weird, but we're on good terms, and since you are now in Harley's life, he wants to get to know you.

Yeah. Yeah. No problemo.

Let's do it.

Great.

Mm.

(moans) I'm gonna RSVP now.

All right. You better save a little bit of that for later.

All right. Where were we?

Um, you were about to give me advice.

Right. Right. Right.

Uh...

Look, I-I-I got a question for you: Is this kid, is he borrowing your lunch money, or is he kind of more like stealing your lunch money?

I think it's the latter.

Yeah. Yeah. I figured.

Um... look, nine out of ten times, the only way you're gonna stop a bully... is by standing up to him.

But Bobby Webster is scary, he growls at me.

Hey. Then you growl right back.

(growls fiercely)

Yeah. I can do that.

All right.

Let's hear it. Come on.

(growls timidly) No, more.

(growls) Oh, man, that's so good!

You're scary.

(laughs) Nice.

All right.

(laughs)

Frank, this is a pharmacy.

Okay, you got to have something.

A vitamin, anything.

Stop flashbacks or memories or, you know, just maybe in general help me make better decisions.

We just got in some chamomile tea.

Everything okay, George?

Yes. Of course.

Why, what have you heard?

Hmm? Y-Y-You just look flushed.

No. No. I'm fine.

I'm, I'm fine.

You don't seem fine, you seem distressed.

Distressed?

That's exactly what I am.

Doc... I--

I need to talk to you for a second, Doc.

I-I also need a doctor- patient confidentiality.

You know, because I did something big.

Big. Huge.

What?

With Lemon?!

Shh!

Please don't tell me you have feelings for her again.

No! No.

That woman drives me nuts.

So nuts that I want to, I want to strangle her half the time.

But the sex was-was amazing.

And now I can't stop picturing it.

Like, seriously, every time I look at her, I'm physically unable to stop picturing it.

Well, now I can't either, so thank you for that.

So what do I do here, okay?

'Cause I-I got to be able to look her in the eye because we own a business together and I...

I'm freaking out.

Well, uh, George, I don't...

Look, no offense, all right, but this is too much for me today.

I have my own tragic, cursed love life to deal with.

No. No, no.

(sighs)

Whoa! Dr. Hart.

(laughs)

Is that you?

(laughs) What happened to you?

(laughs)

(Lemon sighs)

Hi, um, a dozen jelly doughnuts, please.

Actually, make that two dozen.

Lemon, you okay?

Oh. Oh!

(laughs)

I'm great.

Perfect.

Uh, why do you ask?

Because you only eat jelly doughnuts when you're in an emotional crisis.

Oh, no, I'm fine.

Okay. I'm not.

But, I really, really can't talk about it.

Oh, come on now.

I mean, you obviously need to talk.

I'm here.

(laughs)

(sighs)

(sighs)

(whispering): I had sex with George Tucker.

(laughing)

Oh, no.

No. No...

Well, see, I knew I shouldn't have told you.

Yeah. You shouldn't have.

Do you have feelings for him again?

What?! No!

Well, I don't think so.

Listen, we fight all the time, I can barely stand him.

All right?

But I-I mean, not to sound indelicate, but the event itself was... spectacular. (laughs)

T-TMI, Lemon.

You know, I'm just gonna tell him it was a mistake. Right?

That sounds l-like a good idea. Right?

Look, on second thought, this is... ten kinds of weird for me.

You're gonna need someone else to confide in.

G-Good luck.

Well, no.

Lavon. Lavo...

Jeffries: Hey, Burt, the doctor's single now.

You can ask her to the senior social.

Yeah... pass.

(laughs)

Hey!

Wh...

(scoffs)

I'm standing right here.

Well...

Ow!

(laughing)

Hey, be careful!

Ow!

(gasps)

(sighs)

Do you think it's possible that I'm cursed?

You know... I do.

Really?!

I think I was once.

Remember when Chase Cobb gave me syphilis and I accidentally gave it to the Reverend's wife?

That was an undue amount of bad luck.

Well, how'd you turn it around?

It's gonna sound silly.

(sighs)

But I went to see a psychic, Madame Van Horn.

She gave me some advice...

I met Tom... and now we're happily married with a baby goat.

I could never see a psychic.

I mean, I'm a doctor.

Okay... I'm gonna get you a towel.

Your head seems to be bleeding.

What?

Where?

(gasps)

Oh...

A curse, you say.

You may be right.

The cards suggest a transgression in your past is responsible.

Really?

A wedding.

No. But I've never been married.

There's a storm... and the groom... he never makes it down the aisle.

Oh. That wedding.

Tha-- it wasn't my fault.

Not entirely.

A wedding is a very sacred thing.

Breaking up one is one of the worst cosmic sins you can commit.

That explains so much.

It explains everything.

The universe is punishing you.

Your luck in love will never change until you right this wrong.

But how?

That was a long time ago and they've moved on.

But...

Oh, my God.

I'm gonna get Lemon and George back together.

(scoffs)

(laughing): Yeah.

(car horn honks)

(seagulls calling)

Hello.

I have some very, very bad news for you.

You know how you had an affair with Lemon and I had a flirtation with George and we're both sort of behind their whole wedding falling apart?

Yeah.

Well, it turns out that, because of that, we are cursed.

I spoke to a psychic last night.

I wish you'd spoken to a shrink.

I realize that it's illogical, but, here in BlueBell, I kind of think it's possible.

Well, as the mayor of BlueBell, I assure you, there are no curses.

Wait. No. Lavon. Lavon.

Wai-- think about it.

None of us-- not me, not George, not Lemon, not you-- have had any luck in love since that wedding dissolved.

And the news gets worse.

Worse than the curse?

Madame Van Horn says the only way to set things right is to get Lemon and George back together.

What? No. No.

Look, Zoe, I-I realize you have not been in your right mind since the breakup, okay.

But take that notion and put it out of your head.

Right now.

The thing is, I have my reasons to believe that Lem-eorge, is not as far-fetched as we think.

What do you know?

What do you know?

Aha!

Lemon told you.

See, they are already on their way.

They just need a little encouragement.

Oh, no. No, no. No.

Hey, come on, Lavon.

Look, those two, they aren't the same people they were when they broke up.

Maybe they're more compatible now.

And it's our job to guide them.

Our?

Mm-hmm, you were arguably more responsible for their breakup than I was.

Therefore, we are...

Not gonna meddle.

...curse buddies.

See you later, pal.

Hey, you.

Did you tell Harley to pick a fight with some punk twice his size?

What? No.

Look, he came to me. He told me that some kid at school was stealing his lunch money.

I just...

You told him to growl at Bobby Webster.

Bobby Webster!

Oh, geez. Man...

So that's him, huh?

You're Roadhouse?

Okay, I'll handle this, Charles.

Roadhouse?

He started calling you Roadhouse because of some Patrick Swayze movie where the bartender gets into fights or...

You know, it's actually a great movie.

Not a bartender, though.

He's a bouncer.

Really?

Look, the kid came to me in confidence.

I was, I was just trying to help.

But you didn't.

And now my ex thinks that I'm dating some overgrown teenage bonehead who's a bad influence on his son.

I'm sorry, and I will fix this, all right, with both of them.

You'd better.

All right.

Oh, hey, Zoe.

Hey, George.

So, listen, about yesterday, you said you needed a friend, and I wasn't there for you.

And I am so sorry.

No, that's-that's okay.

Don't even worry about it.

I was just thinking about what you told me.

You know, how you can't stop picturing...

And I have a theory.

I am in the throes of an early midlife crisis?

No. You have feelings for Lemon!

Uh, no.

And she has feelings for you, too.

I'm sorry.

She has... for me... Really?

Okay, I'm pretty sure, you know?

You can't deny that something is drawing you to each other... repeatedly.

You went into business together, you slept together.

Yes, but I don't know why I did either of those two things, so...

George, you were with Lemon for 15 years.

That's half of your lives.

You are a part of each other.

Maybe you need the other to feel whole again.

No, no.

Zoe, (chuckles) the woman annoys me to no end.

I-I hate her most of the time.

But just so you know, the brain releases the same chemical for love and hate: oxytocin.

Oxy what now?

Good talk.

Annabeth: Ooh, Davis Polk, our number one frequent flyer!

Dr. Breeland, tell Mr. Polk what he's won!

Wha-What's that?

I don't know.

I'm sorry, I was just, uh, trying to keep things light since we get to see you a lot.

The poor man is suffering from headaches.

A lot of headaches.

Which is why we're gonna get to the bottom of this.

AB, please make Davis an appointment at Mobile Memorial for a full blood panel and an MRI.

What? No-no!

Are you sure that's necessary?

Davis, you've been suffering from headaches nearly every other day for a month.

We need to rule things out.

Now, AB will call you with the time.

Okay.

Okay. (chuckles)

Do you think maybe you could adopt a more generous attitude towards our patients?

I will, when they're actually sick.

Why are you sending this guy in for tests?

He is a hypochondriac!

Make the appointment.

(chuckles)

Oh, hello, George.

Hello, Lemon.

I was wondering, did those three cases of wine happen to come in?

Uh, yeah, they're-they're in the back.

Okay, great.

Uh, but I need your signature on the payroll, please.

Uh, sure, yeah.

(clipboard thuds)

(giggles)

That was so-so clumsy!

No worries, no worries.

(chuckles) So stupid.

Lemon, we need to talk.

(chuckles)

You know, yes, we should.

I, uh, uh, I like your shirt.

(chuckles)

Really? Oh, well, thank you... for that.

Um, you know, your, your top makes you look really nice as well.

Really, really nice.

Beautiful, even.

Thanks, George. (chuckles)

Well, um, it's good to see you.

But we should definitely talk.

Yes! Yes, we should!

Now.

No, not now. Later.

We should talk later.

'Cause, you know, so busy. Two jobs.

I gotta go. I have to, I have things to do.

Okay, good-bye, Lemon.

Hey, Charles.

Hey. Yeah.

Thanks for meeting me, man.

Look, I-I wanted to apologize in person and maybe buy you a cup of coffee.

Well, I appreciate your apology, but I'll pass on the coffee.

I don't want to send the wrong message.

That you're anti-coffee?

(chuckles)

That I want to get to know you.

And lookit, I got no problem with Vivian having a midlife crisis with a juvenile bartender with some rock-hard abs or whatever, no offense.

Well, none taken, you know.

It's not really an insult.

But in the interest of keeping Harley from getting any more black eyes from following your admittedly nutball advice...

No, actually, I didn't admit to giving any nutball advice.

I-I told him to stand up for himself.

Well, I think we're saying the same thing.

I think it's best if you don't see my kid.

Well, except that I'm already going to the family barbecue tomorrow, so...

So you don't go.

Well, that would be rude seeing as how for the first time in my life, actually, I RSVP'd.

Okay, yeah, see what's happening here?

See what's happening right here?

This is what I was talking about.

This is why I did not accept a coffee from you.

All right, well, the good news is you'll have another chance tomorrow, 'cause I'll see ya at the barbecue.

(clears throat)

Okay, so you might be a little mad at me.

I may have suggested to George that he likes Lemon, and, well, vice versa.

No. No!

Come on.

It's not a lie.

You know, they did do it.

And I just wanted to see what they'd do next.

Maybe we set them on a path to reconciliation.

Have you heard anything from Lemon?

No! Not that I'd tell you if I did now.

(knocking)

(grunts)

Lavon, I realize that this is weird, but you're the only person who knows, so you are the only person that I can talk to.

I'm sure there are others.

Someone, anyone, really.

George is acting so, so, so, so, so, so weird.

I'll take this.

Lemon, come with me.

I'd like to talk to you about a little thing I like to call oxytocin.

Whoo! Lookin' good, Dr. Hart!

Thank you.

Oh! Remember to be careful.

(shrieks)

Hey, watch where you're going!

(chuckles)

(clears throat)

Mobile Memorial called.

Davis never showed up for his test.

Really?

Imagine my surprise.

You'll notice my surprise looks exactly like not surprised at all.

Look, I do not know why I have to justify myself to you, but believe me when I tell you that I have considered the possibility that...

That he is a crazy person?

Yes.

Mm-hmm.

Now, go to his house.

Take him to Mobile Memorial, A) because you work for me and B) because what if there really is something?

You'll hate yourself.

And C)...

'Cause I work for you?

Correct!

"A" and "C" are the same.

Mm-hmm.

What happened to your shirt?

Don't ask.

Lavon, I finally think my luck has changed.

Today, I got complimented.

I was flirted with!

Maybe 'cause you finally combed your hair.

Or maybe because Madame Van Horn was right.

Uh.

I am helping get the universe back on track.

Exorcising the curse.

And I wanted you to see.

Wait, that's why we're here at Fancie's?

You said there was a crab cake special.

What's wrong with him?

Hello, Lemon. Hey.

Morning, George.

Oh. She don't look so good either.

Watch and learn, my friend.

Ten bucks says he asks her out right now.

Um, hey, Lemon, I, uh...

I heard... that Hector's having a great deal on prime rib.

I thought I might get some for-for Sunday brunch.

What do you think?

(chuckles)
Uh, George, listen, um...

Yes?

Uh, nothing.

No? Oh.

Oh! Oh!

Well, maybe they still need a tiny push.

Oh, my God. You need to stop, girl.

What? You just saw them.

They were flirting.

Look, someone is gonna get hurt here, Zoe, probably several people, including us.

Just-just let 'em be, please?

I beg you.

Okay, I'll stop. I promise.

Is that a for real promise?

Not the kind of promise where you say one thing and then do something else?

Fine, I promise.

All right.

Now if you'll excuse me, I lost my appetite.

(sighs)

Yep, that is some shiner, kid.

Yeah, just in time for school photo day, too.

Yee-haw.

Well, I think he looks like a tough guy.

Oh, great.

Why don't you take him to get a tattoo, why don't ya?

Maybe an anchor on one arm, a mermaid on the other.

Really? I can get a tattoo?

No!

You're tough enough, kiddo.

You get that from your mama.

Winifred: Did someone say dessert?

Why, yes, they did, and it was me. Come on.

Yeah, uh...

Apple crumble's calling.

Mm-hmm. Wade, I'm gonna show you something over here in the...

There's this real interesting part of the woods where there are no other people.

Yeah.

What are you doing? I thought we were building a bridge.

I'm trying, all right?

Old Chuck over there keeps dynamiting it.

Okay, new strategy.

Why don't you just try and keep your distance?

Sounds good to me.

Trouble in paradise?

Oh, just boys being boys.

Oh, tell me about it. It's always a spitting contest.

Young boys, old boys, you name it.

That's why I just tabled the entire gender.

I'm starting to see the wisdom in that decision.

Mm.

Well, I-I-I don't understand.

Is this a new feature of the practice?

It's like an enhanced house call?

Dr. Breeland sent you here to...?

To personally escort you to Mobile Memorial.

He would do it himself, but he is very, very, very busy.

That is three verys, and apparently I'm bad cop this week, so...

I-I-I appreciate the service, but u-un-unfortunately, um...

I can't go.

Oh, no, you can.

Get in.

I will drive.

Wait. You see, the problem is...

What?

I've never driven with you before.

I'm a very safe driver.

Mr. Polk, I am gonna lose it!

Wait. (chuckles)

Could-could we maybe just have a cold drink first?

A cold drink?

Some iced tea?

You know, (sighs) to calm me down.

Okay, one glass of iced tea.

On the porch.

'Cause I do not go into patients' houses.

It's a serial k*ller thing.

I watch a lot of CBS.

Okay, one second.

All right, all right, people, it is zero hour!

Time for Capture the Wilkes!

It's like, it's like Capture the Flag, only it's more competitive and there's the occasional booby trap.

All right.

Okay, so Vivian, Miles, and Henry, and all the Fairhope Wilkes, you're with Daryl, mm-hmm.

And Harley and Charles and Wade and the Daphne Wilkes are with me.

Come on.

Uh, no-no swaps.

The teams are scientifically calculated, so...

See you on the other side.

All right.

Okay, assignments.

Uh, Harley and Sue, you're my Little Sneakers 'cause you're little and sneaky, okay?

You're gonna be bringing back the other team's flag.

Charles and Wade, you're my two-man recon team.

Stick together and handle prisoner retrieval. Got it?

Are you sure you wouldn't rather that I, like, I don't know, hang back?

Charles: Yeah, you know, maybe send me with Harley.

You know, long-standing tradition of father and son and all.

That's two complaints.

There will not be a third, understand?

Clear?

Clear.

Crystal.

Oh, good.

Flowers? Oh, this is unexpected.

Flowers for George Tucker?

Someone sent me flowers?

There's a note.

Oh, thank you.

You have a nice day.

"Please give me a second chance."

"Dinner tonight?

Le Pain..."

"...Perdu, Mobile."

"George."

"Lemon."

Thank you very much.

(chuckles)

Any time.

Have yourself a nice day now.

Hi. Can I have a Scotch, neat?

(chuckles) Thank you.

Wow.

Lemon. (laughs)

George.

Who would have thought that we'd be having dinner, just the two of us, like this?

Well, certainly not me, but life is full of surprises, isn't it?

That it is.

Your table is ready, sir.

Great.

After you.

You're kidding.

A shark did that?

They got skin like sandpaper.

You're supposed to keep your limbs in the cage, but when I saw that thing swim by, I thought...

When am I gonna get another chance to pet a tiger shark?

Exactly.

I don't get you.

Diving in shark cages?

Only, like, three or four times.

But you're terrified of getting your blood test.

Davis, I get that you're worried, but can I just say there is such a very good chance that they're not gonna find anything.

Oh, I know they're not gonna find anything.

'Cause you're not sick.

I'm not.

I, um...

I made it all up.

I-I kept going in there to see you.

To ask you out.

Every time I...

I walked in, I lost my nerve, so...

And it's not-not like I could, you know, put on that stupid knight's costume back on.

The knight who bought me a drink at the Renaissance fair?

That was you?

I only had the armor for 24 hours.

(sighs)

I scared you off.

No, uh, no.

I just...

Overwhelmed me, maybe.

Uh, I should go.

I... Yeah.

Do you remember our first dinner?

I do, I do.

A drive-through outside of Lillian.

(laughs) You split your cheese fries with me.

Yeah, well, you were wearing a cheerleader outfit.

I would have split my bank account with you.

(both laugh)

What are you doing here?!

The relevant question is, what are Lemon and George doing here after you promised me?

Shh! Move! I don't want them to see you. Sit down!

I will sit down for a second.

Then you're gonna go over there and tell them what you did or I will.

No, you can't! Come on.

Look at them.

They're having a great time.

LEMON (laughs): Do you remember when my father walked in on us?

I know, I know!

I thought I'd never be able to look Brick in the eye again.

And then my mom, the next day, decided to take me to see Dr. Wilkes for some sh*ts, and your dad was covering for him.

Oh! We were so young.

So stupid.

So happy.

Okay, they may be having fun, but it's only because they're here under false pretenses.

Or maybe it's because they like each other.

Everybody in town had to take shifts as buffers to keep them from k*lling each other when they were opening Fancie's!

Well, maybe they pick at each other because they don't want to show their true feelings.

They don't have true feelings!

They have a little voice in their head, and eventually they're gonna find out that voice is you.

Well, they will thank me at their next wedding.

(groans)

Well, you know what? The special sounds amazing.

And since it is a special night, I'll have that.

Lemon?

Um, I will have the salmon, please.

Waiter: Lovely choice.

(clears throat)

What? What's that look on your face for?

No reason, no reason.

Just, you know, every time you order fish at a restaurant, you end up sending it back, so...

Well, tonight I won't.

Okay, tonight you won't.

They're not gonna make it to dessert.

(twigs snap loudly)

Hey, Roadhouse, walk a little louder, why don't you?

You know, enough with the "Roadhouse," all right?

Have you even seen that movie?

Yeah, I've seen the movie.

See, I don't think you have.

'Cause if you had, you'd realize that calling me Roadhouse is actually kind of a compliment.

See, in the movie, Patrick Swayze's Dalton is not only a bouncer, but he's a philosopher, a college grad, a tai chi master and a mediator.

Not to mention that he tears people's throats out for a living.

So you know what? Thank you.

Look, all I'm saying is, the way you're tromping through the woods, there's a good chance someone from the blue team still hasn't heard us.

I wouldn't worry too much about it, because, actually, the sound of your whining is drowning out my footsteps.

Shh. Stop. You hear that?

Yeah. That's what we overgrown juveniles like to call a rabbit.

Okay, well, my instincts tell me that we should go back.

Oh, is that the same instinct that told you to put on that shirt this morning?

This is a good shirt.

Not every guy can pull off pink.

Right. You keep telling yourself that. I'm going this way.

Wha...

(gasps)

Well, I guess that's some smart rabbit.

Shut up.

And you know, I don't care what anyone says, that Wes Anderson is like the Emperor's New Clothes of movie directors. I just don't understand a single word.

I'll tell you what, Lemon. You have given me so many movie reviews tonight, you barely touched your salmon.

Are you sure you don't want to send it back?

'Cause you can.

Not at all! (laughs)

Hey! Hi!

Excuse me. Could you go over to the table over there and play your most romantic song?

Okay.

No.

No more interfering.

But...

Watch and learn, my friend. Watch and learn.

Hello, how is everything?

Shall I take away the salmon?

Uh, no, not at all. I'm enjoying every single little bite.

(chuckles) Thank you.

Okay, Lemon, you do not have to eat the salmon for me.

What? I love the salmon.

It's, um, phenomenal.

I just had a big lunch, so...

You can barely swallow it.

Yes, I can.

(laughs)

Yeah.

Exactly. Look at you, Lemon.

You hate it.

Okay, fine. I hate it.

All right?

But how was I supposed to know that the fish was gonna be so fishy?!

Because it's fish!

If you don't like fish, you don't order the fish!

Oh, I'm sorry.

I forgot I was out with the ordering police.

What?!

Lemon: Okay, Mr. Judgey.

It just so happens that salmon, if prepared properly, is not supposed to taste fishy.

And who are you to criticize?

Because, as a man with borderline high cholesterol, that lamb was a very dangerous choice!

Okay, my cholesterol?

None of your business.

Okay, clearly this was a huge mistake.

Enormous.

Okay, you know, if I had known that you were gonna be such a boar, I wouldn't have accepted your invitation.

Nice try. You invited me here.

I most certainly did not.

Oh, we should probably go.

(gasps)

(crashes loudly)

Zoe.

Of course.

Oh, oh, it's my fault?

Well, how-how do you figure that?

Because I've played Capture the Wilkes for the last ten years, and the only time I get stuck in a net is the time I'm with you.

That doesn't prove anything.

Because 100% of the time that I've been teamed up with you in this dumb-ass game, I've ended up in a net.

You're an idiot.

What is wrong with you, man?

Seriously.

I mean, you can't possibly be like this all the time or the Vivian I know never would've married you.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What-what the hell does that mean?

Look, Charles.

I am sorry that Harley ended up with a black eye.

I am out of practice dispensing advice to eight-year-olds.

But... but I just, I just want the kid to like me, okay?

How-how do you think it feels that the one time he comes to me for advice, he ends up with a black eye?

Well, how do you think it feels that my kid has to go the new guy in his life who-who works at a bar and drives a truck and... rips people's throats out whenever they...

I am not a bouncer!

All right? Watch the damn movie!

Harley: Are you guys fighting?

Harley! Hey!

Hey, little man?

You think you could lend us a hand here, bud?

Maybe grab us a ladder?

Brick.

What's going on?

So, how did Davis Polk's test go?

I never heard from you.

That's 'cause we never made it to Mobile.

Oh, no, no, no.

We need to find out what is wrong with that young man.

Nothing.

Nothing is wrong with him.

I mean, I was right.

He was faking it.

He told me so himself, so...

Faking it? Really?

Mm-hmm. Mmm.

So, did he tell you he loved you yet?

You knew?

Well, of course I knew.

The man had 14 appointments in one month.

I just don't see how you didn't know.

(sighs) I...

You don't think I should go out with him?

Why not?

He's... he's just shy.

What if I'm just, uh, not in a place to like anyone right now?

What if?

You're never gonna know unless you try.

(quiet laugh)

I should seriously have a restraining order against you!

You are perhaps the saddest, most misguided person I've ever met Why do you keep butting into my love life?! in my entire life!

Oh, come on, now cut her some slack!

She just had a breakup.

She's not in her right mind.

I am so in my right mind!

Look, this could've worked!

You were one piece of fish away from having a great night, getting back together, and fixing all of our problems.

What... what is she talking about?

You don't want to know.

We're cursed.

What?

And now you do.

Don't you see?

Ever since you two didn't walk down the aisle, none of us have been able to have a meaningful relationship.

You need to set things right.

(laughs): Yeah.

Did she see Madame Van Horn?

Yup.

Zoe... that woman is a quack.

Okay? I currently got four active law suits open against her.

Sad.

Just sad.

But in good news, I feel too sorry for you to be angry.

Well... you're wrong!

We're cursed!

I know we're cursed.

That's the only reason that would explain why Joel is gone, right?

Oh, Zoe...

Hey, Wade, check it out!

It's the Capture the Wilkes winner's trophy.

Our names are on it.

Really?

Yeah, all of them.

Well, would you look at that?

Right under the POWs.

(Wade chuckles)

Can I show Wanda the trophy?

Yeah, of course you can, man.

She's in the kitchen.

Go check her out.

So, look, I guess I'm just, you know, trying to get used to the idea that there is another man in my family's life.

But if it has to be someone... you know...

You can't bring yourself to say it, can you?

I'm working on it.

Good enough.

AnnaBeth.

My answer is yes.

I would, I would be happy to go on a date with you.

You-You're-you're letting me off the hook.

I haven't even officially asked you out yet.

Well, go ahead then.

Wou...?

AnnaBeth, will you...

...go out with me?

Well, usually there's a specific date and time.

Like... dinner tonight?

Oh, God, I would love to, but I have this, um...

Is there any chance you'd want to go to this-this black-tie fund-raiser thing with me?

Black-tie? I would love to.

See? How hard was that?

(both laugh)

I will pick you up at 7:00.

Yes, you will.

Oh, who's the fund-raiser for, by the way?

Oh, is it some shark-hunting expedition?

(laughs) Well, that depends on who you ask.

It's-it's for my uncle.

Oh.

His reelection campaign.

He's the mayor of Fillmore.

Mayor Gainey?

Yeah.

Is your uncle?

That's right.

(laughs) Well, sounds like a really interesting evening.

So I am in.

Great! All right.

Okay.

Bye.

Okay, bye.

Bye!

(door opens)

What are you doing?

Packing up Joel's stuff.

Ah.

I miss him.

But you were right.

He didn't leave because we were cursed.

No.

I mean, I-I could have gone to L.A. or to London, but I chose not to.

We could be together right now.

But I just couldn't.

It was me.

Yeah, but you wouldn't have liked it.

I mean, all that sun.

Followed by all that fog.

You belong here.

What if I made the biggest mistake of my life, and let the right person just walk away forever?

Yeah, I think about that every day.

It doesn't mean that I didn't love him.

No.

Definitely not.

Because-because I did.

I loved him so much.

Hello, Lemon.

(laughs) Hello, George.

Hi. I, uh, I just wanted to say that the other night?

It was amazing.

It was.

Yes, and I should have told you that the morning after.

And then I should have told you that it was a mistake.

Because...

Because it was!

Yeah, yeah, I mean, if I would've just told you then...

Then we could've avoided Zoe Hart's ridiculous matchmaking scheme.

Exactly, exactly.

Yes.

And as far as last night goes, I also wanted to apologize for that.

I was a jerk.

I don't know why, I don't know what it is about you that drives me... so crazy.

(laughs): Oh.

But you and I have to figure out a way to get past that, you know, because we own a business together now.

We do, we do.

And if there's one thing that I've learned about owning a business, it's that you have to keep your personal life and your business life completely separate because if you don't, then everything...

(Lemon's voice fades out)

...you can recover from that very...

Hello?

George?

Tha... uh, yes.

Why do you have that dopey look on your face? Are you even listening to me?

Oh, yes, yes, I am.

I completely am.

I was just... you know, I just...

I had a thought that, uh, you know, maybe the best way for us to handle this going forward is for me to be more of a silent partner, you know?

The restaurant, this whole thing?

That's-that's more, that's more you, so...

Yeah, well, I mean, that'd be fine.

Are you sure?

100% sure, yes.

I am.

Well, okay.

Okay.

(laughs)

Great.
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