03x19 - A Better Man

[bunniefuu]

I'm here to celebrate the good news about my beloved nephew dating AnnaBeth Nass.

I'm here to warn you.

You came to my house to tell me my new boyfriend is only with me as part of a plot...

I'm trying to protect you.

You're being a jealous ex-boyfriend.

George: The sex was amazing.

With Lemon?!

Shh! Shh!

Every time I look at her, I am physically unable to stop picturing it.

What's he...?

Charles slept on the couch.

He stayed here?

It wasn't a big deal.

Okay.

I should go.

Yeah. I'll call you later.

Oh, what the hell.

(beep)

Hi! You've reached Vivian Wilkes.

Leave a message.

Uh, hey, Viv. It's Wade calling.

Just thought I'd give you a shout.

Been a few days...

(thudding)

I am gonna wring your little...!

Uh... not you.

The... the raccoon.

Which-which... may...

May-Maybe that sounded weird, but there was... there was a raccoon.

Which you probably guessed.

And, uh, well, now it's gone.

So, uh... look, I-I'd love to see you.

And there are no more raccoons over here at Casa de Wade.

Call me.

(beep)

(whispering): Casa de Wade. What?

Lavon: I can't get any lower.

I've sunk as low as humanly possible.

Blew our chance to host the county fair.

A.B. hates me, town hates me.

And, in worse news, I am the subject of the Owls' charity roast.

They won't even need to write jokes.

Come on. I know times are rough, but you're Lavon Hayes.

Two Super Bowls, four Pro Bowls.

Every time you get knocked down, you get right back up. Come on.

Go.

Oh.

Geez.

I did get knocked down a lot.

See, it's a pattern.

No, that's not what I meant at all.

Oh.

Oh. (sighs)

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Where are you going?

I need to talk to you.

Lavon: Not now. Owl meeting.

I got to face the music, the pitchforks, the rotten tomatoes in my face.

(scoffs)

(laughs) de, everything okay?

Just fine. Dandy.

Yeah? Well, that thinking crease is making a rare appearance in your forehead, so, what's going on?

It's just Vivian.

All right?

Things are, oh, weird between us.

She's distant, she won't return my calls.

She's spending a lot of time with Charles.

So, her and Charles are friends.

It's evolved.

It's great for Harley.

I wish my parents made that kind of effort.

Trust me, he's not making that effort for Harley.

Oh, Wade, come on.

Vivian is crazy about you!

And Charles-- he's Charles.

But you-- you're you.

You know?

He's not a thr*at.

Oh, come on.

No more thinking face.

Look, I'll tell you what.

I have plans with Vivian to get our nails done later.

I'll do some digging.

You'd do that for me?

Yeah, well, I have to.

I am your doctor.

Besides, all this sudden thinking could be very dangerous for your unused brain.

Ha, ha.

Thank you.

Mm-hmm.

George.

(distorted): George.

(distorted): Have you seen this report?

(clearly): What are we gonna do?

Uh...

George! You're doing it again.

You're zoning out.

No. No. No, Lemon, I'm not.

I was... I was just...

I was just really thinking about what you were saying.

Which was...?

You know, the...

(mutters) The health inspection report.

Yeah.

We got an A-minus.

Which is great.

An A-minus, George.

An A-minus!

Mae Ellen Waterloo has never given me less than an "A," not even for the Rammer Jammer.

A glowing and pristine cleanliness is my signature.

Okay.

Well, then, maybe Mae, you know, had a bad morning.

She got out of bed on the wrong side, or someone peed in her coffee. Who knows?

Well, not at Fancie's!

That might have happened at the Rammer Jammer, but nobody ever knew, so...

I wish I didn't know about it.

George, you're right.

Mae wasn't her usual bubbly self. She wasn't whistling or making any jokes.

Exactly. There you go.

Mystery solved.

Now you can just move on.

Or... I can fix her.

Thank you, George.

Good Owls, last week I let my personal life-- you know, my breakup with A.B., my animosity for all things Gainey-- get in the way of BlueBell's best interest.

Which is why I understand if you want to cancel your annual Mayoral Toast and Roast.

Better yet, let's vote on a replacement.

I nominate me.

Mayfair: No! Now, is there anyone here who has not crossed the line when it comes to matters of the heart?

Hmm? Why, when I was in the seventh grade, I joined the choir just so I could sit next to Ella-Jean Swain.

Bill: It is possible that I may have let Cupid's arrow talk me out of any number of tickets.

Mm.

I sent 150 postcards to Kerry Washington and flowers on her birthday.

All returned.

(crowd murmuring)

Mm. Mayor Hayes, we, the Owls, stand by you.

All those in favor of moving forward with the Mayoral Toast and Roast, let me hear you hoot.

(all hooting)

Hooty, hoot, hoot, hoot!

(hooting continues)

Belles, I understand there are some among you that may take issue with my new boyfriend.

It is true that Davis Polk is a Gainey, but he is also a wonderful and honest man.

That said, if you feel the need to censure me or even ask for my resignation as Belle co-leader, I will not object.

Well, I will.

If AnnaBeth is happy, then we should be happy for her.

Agreed.

Seconded and thirded!

Especially after the way you crapped out in love this year.

Oops.

Send that to college, Crickett.

What I mean is, shame on Mayor Hayes!

(overlapping chatter)

He wastes some of your most fertile months, breaks up with you, and then has the gall to Gainey-shame you?!

Well, I'm not sure I would go that far...

That's right, Elodie.

Lavon is the one who should be censured.

I move that we pull out of the Owls' Mayoral Toast and Roast this year in solidarity for our beloved A.B.

Oh, I don't know.

I mean, we've rehearsed, and the costumes are really great.

But, oh, y'all would do that for me?

All in favor?

All: Yea!

Yay!

Hey, George. How are you?

Oh, hey.

Good to see you.

Oh, I'm good. I'm good. Thank you so much, Reverend, for taking the time to see me.

It's much appreciated.

Well, of course, whenever one of my flock asks for help, I help.

So, lay it on me, brother.

(laughs)

It's a little too much vernacular sauce?

No, no, it's-it's...

I'm sorry.

Just a little...

Go ahead.

Uh, but, anyway, the-the situation is...

You know, say that one of your flock, uh, had developed feelings for the most spoiled, irritating and annoying sheep in town, and-and... he wants to rid himself of said feelings.

George, it sounds like you need something to take your mind off this particular sheep, and I know just what it should be.

Prayer.

A date with our visiting Sunday school teacher.

Oh, yeah. No.

I mean, no offense, Reverend, but that-that is so not what I had in mind.

Well, I think it's a great idea.

And you know who also thinks so?

Big guy in the sky?

That's correct, George.

Big guy in the sky.

Yeah, I was afraid of that.

Yeah, and now that Harley has gotten a hit in the actual game, he's telling the coach to call him Little Papi.

That is so cute.

I know.

How-How's, uh, everything else going? How's work?

It's good. We're starting our unit on geology, which is my favorite time of year.

That is awesome.

How is Wade? How are things going there?

Why are you asking?

You don't usually.

Did he say something?

No! No.

Okay, well, he might have mentioned that you hadn't called him back.

Yeah.

I've sort of been avoiding him.

What? Why?

The other night, Wade told me that he thought Charles was trying to get me back.

So Wade was jealous.

You can't punish him for that.

But the thing is, Wade was right.

Charles does want you back?

But what about you? How do you feel?

Confused.

Charles and I had nearly 15 happy years together.

He's the father of my child.

But he left, and now there's Wade, who...

He's amazing, and...

And he cares about you a lot.

I know.

Promise me you won't tell him, okay?

Okay.

But you have to.

I will.

Just as soon as I decide what to tell him.

(screams)

Hey, Doc. Just doing a bit of tree-trimming.

Sorry I scared you.

No, no, not scared.

See you later.

Uh, you know, I stopped by last night.

You-you didn't answer.

Oh, I fell asleep early.

At 8:30?

Yeah, I was exhausted.

Or you're avoiding me.

What?! Why would I do that?

I don't know.

'Cause Vivian told you something yesterday.

Something you're reluctant to repeat.

Funny thing, I didn't even see Vivian yesterday.

There was a huge, exhausting medical emergency, which is why I fell asleep early, which explains everything. Bye.

(sighs)

Okay, uh, Lavon, you'll do your mayoral champagne toast, applause, applause, applause.

Then I will introduce the Belles, who will then sing an original number.

Why are they late to rehearsal?

I don't stand for divas.

Crickett texted me.

They're on their way.

Crickett: Update.

We have arrived!

Where are the rest of 'em?

Dash: Ladies, might I remind y'all that rehearsal is mandatory?

Oh. Oh, we're not here to rehearse.

(plays note)

♪ You showed up drunk on A.B.'s door ♪
♪ You basically called her Gainey's whore ♪
♪ Well, you won't get away with that no more ♪
♪ So there'll be no Belles ♪
♪ At the Toast and Roast ♪
♪ So suck it... ♪
♪ Lavon ♪
♪ Hayes. ♪

O-Okay, uh, d-don't worry about this.

Heh. I'll fix it.

(chuckles, clears throat)

(indistinct chatter)

Man: That was just rude.

(band playing foxtrot music)

Mae?

Lemon.

What are you doing here?

(sighing): Well... I was worried about you, Mae.

When you came to Fancie's earlier, you weren't your usual self.

You were missing your pep, your zest, your joie de vivre, so I brought pie.

(laughing): Joie de vivre pie?

Is this about that A-minus?

(chuckles) It's not the grade I care about.

(foxtrot music continues)

It's the, uh... credibility of the system.

What is that music?

That's the sound of my broken dreams.

Not enough pie in the world to fix 'em.

Oh, Mae, I knew it must have been something.

Sweetie, tell me.

Well, I just spent the last six months rehearsing for a ballroom dance competition tonight, until my partner tore his Achilles tendon.

I didn't want to win.

I just wanted to compete, you know?

Like that character in that movie who just wants to dance.

Black Swan? The Company? Step Up?

Shall We Dance? Step Up 2?

Dance With Me? Take the Lead? Strictly Ballroom?

Silver Linings Playbook?

Third one, I think.

♪

What if I told you that I happen to know an excellent ballroom dancer who's available this evening?

I guess... I would have to ask... does he have good hygiene?

I mean, once a health inspector, always a health inspector.

As a matter of fact, he is a doctor.

I know this medication is helping me, but I think it's making me crazy.

One second, I'm so happy.

I look at Tom, I love him so much.

The next, I see his eyebrows, and they are so bushy.

I want to tear those eyebrows out, like rip them off his face!

But moodiness is a common side effect of Clomiphene.

Now the good news: it is working!

You are officially ovulating.

So you and Tom need to start trying to make a baby tonight.

(chuckles)

Bushy eyebrows or not.

(quiet laugh)

(bell tinkles)

Hey.

AnnaBeth, could you do me a small favor? If Wade happens to ask, can you say there was a medical emergency yesterday afternoon?

You want me to lie to Wade?

Exactly. Also, if he calls or drops by, can you tell him that I'm in with a patient?

Also a lie. Wanda's the only patient on the books, and she is already in with Brick.

What? Brick needs a consult?

I'll be right in.

Oh, hey, Wade.

I hope you're not sick, 'cause sadly, there's a situation with a patient.

Brick and I are probably gonna be in with her a-all morning.

A-All day.

Maybe into night.

Did you hear about that big medical emergency yesterday?

Because, boy, it was very big, very... medical.

Hmm.

Dr. Hart, what are...what are you?

Oh, well, Wanda's my patient, too, and I also care about her future offspring.

How is the Clomiphene going?

It's making me crazy, but it's working.

Yeah. - Hey, that's great! Now, now, I'm just gonna let Wanda go home and get ready for baby-making tonight.

Home? No.

We should talk first.

Have a nice long talk, you know, about positions and timing, getting Tom to relax, getting him in the mood.

What? You think I can't get Tom in the mood?

Well, I most certainly can!

Why do you think I can't?

No. Nothing. No reason.

Good! 'Cause I can!

Thank you for your input, Dr. Hart.

That was very helpful.

Yes, Sergeant Jeffries was bitten by an anaconda.

Hmm.

But luckily, Dr. Hart was there to stitch him up.

Oh.

Wanda: Anacondas?

In BlueBell?

What kind of place is this to raise a child?!

(Wanda sobbing)

Hey, Doc.

You know, AnnaBeth was actually just telling me about the big emergency.

See, I didn't realize we've got anacondas here in Alabama.

Annabeth: Uh, that's right, we don't.

It must have escaped from the zoo.

That explains it!

Very likely story.

Thank you, AnnaBeth.

(weak chuckle)

I can't tell you.

Zoe, please, you've got to tell me.

LulaBelle, why don't you tell George about your summer working as a counselor at Bible camp? Oh, wow.

Wow, Sunday school teacher all year round, and Bible camp in the summer-- that is so, uh...

"Devout" is the word that you're looking for.

That is. That is the word I was looking for.

George also spent a summer working in Bible camp. Didn't you?

I did. I did.

I also found it to be extremely enlightening and, uh, and-and whatnot.

Hey, here's an idea.

Why don't you two kids go out for a nice dinner and share w*r stories?

Yeah! You talk it over.

The reverend is gonna help me make another pot of tea.

(laughs): No, sweetheart, you don't need two people to make a pot of...

Yes, you do need two people.

George: So...

(clears throat, chuckles)

Uh, so, about tonight...

Pick me up at 7:00.

Drop me off around the corner.

I'll tell the Mayfairs we went for burgers and bowling.

No one'll be the wiser.

Are you blowing me off? No offense, but anyone who thought Bible camp was "enlightening" just is not my type. - Well, uh, I am sitting here, having tea and crumpets with the reverend and his wife.

(brief chuckle)

What exactly would you like me to say?

So you lied to a man of the cloth in his own home, over his own tea and crumpets?

I am a little bit more complicated than I seem.

We'll have to see about that.

I was gonna try this new club in Montgomery tonight.

You want to join?

You know, I am looking for a distraction, so yes, why the hell not?

Zoe: Vivian's my cousin, Wade-- I promised.

But you want to tell me.

I can see that.

Yes.

So if you can't speak, maybe you can... blink.

All right? Like, one blink for no, two blinks for yes.

Why aren't you saying anything? You in or out?

Well, I was blinking.

I just blinked twice.

Oh. Oh, oh, all right.

So... was I right?

Is Charles trying to win Vivian back?

(gulps)

And is... is she considering him?

You got something in your eye, Doc?

Wade, where are you going?

(groans)

(knocking)

Lavon.

Look, I-I get that you're still mad at me and it's probably gonna take a while for you to forgive me, if ever. That's fair.

But considering how small this town is, could you try and resist turning the Belles against me, too?

I'm sorry, you think I did what now?

The Belles dropped out of the Mayoral Toast and Roast.

You're the leader of the Belles.

(laughing): Oh, my God.

You'd think a couple of days could go by without you blindly accusing me of sabotaging the town of BlueBell?

I see.

So this is not you punishing me?

No. You did that all on your own, with your ridiculous and childish and very un-mayoral behavior.

Okay, you know what? I came here to apologize, again.

Try and make peace.

Forget it.

Yeah, you know what? The-the Mayoral Toast and Roast will-will do just fine without the Belles.

Yeah, we will sell plenty of tickets without your dumb song.

Oh! Well, that is really good to hear, because the Belles are about to be very busy preparing for a new tradition.

The first ever annual Head-of-the-Belles Toast and Roast.

What?

But there is no...

Oh, you can't do that.

Oh, I just did.

Oh, and guess what.

It happens to be on the same night.

(gasps): Oh!

See you, Lavon.

(door slams)

(grunts)

(thunder crashes)

Of course.

(knocking)

Zoe told you.

Yeah.

Wade... I'm so sorry.

No, let me talk first, all right?

I got something to say.

I get what being with Charles means, all right?

You got a son and you got history.

But you and me, w-we got something real right now.

And I'm not gonna stand by and let him take you away from me.

I-I can't do that.

That is the most... romantic thing I've ever heard.

(whistling)

Well, hello there, Doc.

You're up early.

It is a glorious day, is it not?

Where have you been?

Well, a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell.

But because I am no gentleman...

Hmm.

I was at Vivian's.

Oh, really? So you talked?

Mm-hmm.

Put it all on the line. Told her I wouldn't give up without a fight.

And then she took me in her arms... like in one of those movies you like so much.

Wade, that's amazing.

Well, the better man won.

Well, so when's she gonna talk to Charles? I don't know.

I don't care.

But she did say she was gonna talk to him?

Well, I mean, not in so many words.

But it was strongly implied by her lack of clothing.

Hmm?

Okay.

Look, we had an incredible night last night.

And if you're saying (chuckles): that... I mean, after we... and... th-th-that she would choose him...

W... I'm not saying anything.

Look, I just hope that you're not jumping to conclusions, hearing things that weren't actually said.

Look, I-I don't want to put you in an awkward position, but maybe you could, uh... you can just talk to her.

All right?

Put in a good word for me.

She trusts you.

Okay.

Zoe Hart! All right!

Hey, you want to head over to Lavon's? If he's making waffles, I'm buying.

All right, well, let's do it. Come on.

I got your little mag here.

It's a newspaper! A newspaper, Wade.

Oh, yeah.

Without the Belles, this Toast and Roast is toast.

If they're putting on their own show, who's gonna want to watch us?

I don't even know what we're doing here.

I got 19 episodes of Chicago Fire burning up my DVR.

We all done crying in our soup?

Oh, come on, Lavon, you got to admit, things are looking mighty bleak.

No. No, I don't.

And you know why?

'Cause I'm talking to the BlueBell Owls.

Okay, look, maybe our legs won't look as good in a cancan line as the Belles.

But we got something else.

It's gonna be that kind of show?

Like a Full Monty typething?

What? No!

Look, I'm talking about what we got right here.

I am sitting here with the most talented musical men of this generation.

Now, who's with me?

(grumbling)

I don't know, Lavon.

Stanley.

I saw you channel Fred Astaire in Shelby's cabaret.

Oh, yeah, he did, yeah. Huh?

At least from the knees down.

And, Frank, Bill, Wally, y'all harmonize like the best barbershop quartet, and there's only three of you.

Yeah, that's true.

Huh?

That's true.

And, Reverend, well, if Jazz Hands ain't your middle name, it ought to be.

Aw, stop it. - Yeah.

(laughter)

Come on. Give me a hoot.

Hoot!

Hoot!

Hoot!

Yeah!

(hooting)

One, two, three, four.

♪ She used to bite her tongue and hold her breath ♪
♪ Scared to rock the boat and make a mess ♪
♪ So she sat quietly ♪
♪ Agreed politely ♪
♪ We guess that she forgot ♪
♪ She had a choice ♪

Owls: ♪ There is ♪
♪ A brotherhood of man ♪
♪ A benevolent brotherhood of man ♪
♪ A noble tie that binds ♪
♪ All human hearts and minds ♪
♪ Into one brotherhood of ♪
♪ Man ♪

Belles: ♪ We've got the eyes of the ♪
♪ Tigers, the fighters ♪
♪ Dancing through the fires ♪
♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪
♪ And you're gonna hear ♪
♪ Us roar louder ♪
♪ Louder than a lion ♪
♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪
♪ And you're gonna hear me roar ♪
♪ Your lifelong membership ♪
♪ Is free ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, ♪
♪ Keep a-givin' each brother all ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ You're gonna hear us roar ♪
♪ You can, oh, aren't you ♪
♪ Proud to be in that fraternity ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ The great big brotherhood of ♪
♪ Man ♪
♪ You're gonna ♪
♪ Hear us roar. ♪

(cymbal clashes)

Dash: And then Tom Long's spotlight hits Lavon!

Whoa. Speaking of Tom Long, there's no show without lights.

Shouldn't he be here?

There's no show without Tom.

He's got the only lighting system in town!

He's the only one who understands the light board!

We have to get Tom Long! We have to find Tom Long!

Wait a minute. I disagree. I think my life is very complete.

Oh, really?

Well, that's odd because you spent the entire weekend listening to Don Todd's biography on tape, after the previous weekend in which you read it to yourself.

Well, it is a different story when the man himself reads it to you.

Look, the point is, this is a questionable way to get your restaurant reinspected.

You wasted no time in finding your dance shoes, which were conveniently located by your bedside next to a CD player full of rumba classics.

(knocking)

Mae! Come on in.

(quietly): Daddy, just be nice.

Please. That's all I ask.

I know I'm early, but I figure we only have a few hours to rehearse.

Mae, this is my daddy, Brick.

Daddy, this is Mae Ellen Waterloo, your dance partner for this evening.

Wow.

That is a spectacular gown.

And you are exactly the right height.

Oh.

(chuckles)

This is... a dream come true.

(chuckles)

How's your feather step?

Well, in a hyphenated word, award-winning.

Oh. Good.

(chuckles)

(squeals)

(knocking)

Oh, there she is, the Edward Snowden of family secrets.

I am so sorry.

Come in.

Zoe, I-I put you in a terrible position.

I don't blame you at all.

What is going on?

As you may have heard, Wade and I had the most incredible night.

And he was... romantic and strong...

I don't...

I don't need the details.

But that is great.

Yay, Wade! Right?

But this morning Charles came by.

And he got a job offer in Baton Rouge.

He wants to move.

Wow.

Wait, Charles is going to Baton Rouge?

That's gonna be hard on Harley.

Oh, no, no.

Zoe, you don't understand.

This is a huge job.

He wants all of us to move.

Charles thinks that this... could be our clean slate, a fresh start.

But, Vivian, you don't love Charles anymore.

I mean, you've moved on.

But here's the thing.

Uh, the other night, when he told me that he still had feelings, he... kissed me.

And I kind of...

I kissed him back.

Oh, Vivian.

I know. But we were high school sweethearts and he was my husband.

We have a child together.

Those feelings just don't go away.

But what about Wade? You know?

(phone ringing)

He's a good guy. He deserves...

Excuse me.

Hey, Winifred, what's up?

(sighs)

Oh, my God.

No, no. Yeah, I-I'll be right there.

Harley fell off the jungle gym.

He may have a broken arm.

I'll drive.

(sighs, moans)

(exhales)

Psst, Tom.

Mayor Hayes?

I've been leaving you messages, man.

I turned my phone off.

I have a big night ahead of me.

Wanda says cellular devices transmit stress.

I am not to be stressed.

O-Okay, but I need to talk to you about doing the lights for the Mayoral Toast and Roast.

Turns out, through a quirk in the calendar, the Belles' show is the exact same night as the Owls'.

Oh, that's gonna put me in an uncomfortable position.

You know how everybody loves your lighting design.

Annabeth: We are willing to give you above-the-title credits.

"Tom Long presents the Head of the Belles Dinner."

They're talking about making you an honorary Owl.

For life.

U-Unlimited babysitting for baby goats or any humans that come along.

Lavon: You know, I-I'll be okay.

But the rest of the guys will be very disappointed if you say no.

Very disappointed.

I don't want to upset anyone.

Well, then you know what to do.

Because the Belles would consider it the mother of all slaps in the face. So what do you say?

I need an answer, Tom!

(groans)

I-I need some time I need some time to think about it. to think about it.

(grunts)

WOMAN (over P.A.): Dr. Kravitz, you have a visitor in the main lobby.

Vivian: Harley, sweetie, are you okay, baby?

Mommy, I fell.

I feel horrible.

I looked away for one second.

It's not your fault.

Things happen.

Buddy, you okay?

Daddy, my arm hurts. My face is bleeding.

Okay, big guy.

We're gonna sew up that chin and take some cool pictures of thinside of your arm.

I know what an X ray is.

Good for you.

Mom, Dad, one of you want to come be my assistant?

(foxtrot music playing)

Big finish!

(song ends)

(Lemon yelps)

(both laugh)

Oh, you just...

We're actually good.

It was like riding a bicycle.

Oh, Mae, you know, if-if I can survive the evening, we may do some damage at this contest.

(laughing): My gosh.

(phone ringing)

Oh, I better get that.

Uh, don't forget to hydrate.

Okay.

Well? Someone has got her sparkle back. Now, that is the Mae I remember.

Y'all are gonna set that dance floor on fire.

Yeah, well, hold that thought.

Oh, no.

Brick: Mae, I am so sorry to do this to you. That was a medical emergency, and I...

I have to attend to it.

But you... you do such a beautiful box step.

I-I do wish I could god 'cause I think we could kick some serious ballroom butt.

(chuckles) Unfortunately, duty calls.

That stinks.

Don't despair, Mae.

I have an idea.

(loud whisper): Tom?

Tom, I got your message.

Tom.

Where are you, man?

Oh, I don't believe this.

Let me guess.

Y-You got a text from Tom, and it said he had come to a decision regarding the lights and...

We should rendezvous at the gazebo? Yep. Same text.

I think someone's messing with us.

Wanda: Good guess, Sherlock.

Wanda?

Yep. Just Wanda.

Disappointing, huh?

How does it feel to show up somewhere with such high hopes only to find out you're not gettin' what you expected?

Wanda, what's going on?

Are you wearing fishnets? Yes, I am!

'Cause tonight's a big night for me and Tom, a big, big, big night, which is why Tom was relaxing until you two ding-dongs undid all my doing.

And, hello, now Tom's so stressed about who he's supposed to help, he can't... perform.

Well, guess what.

If he can't perform, you don't perform.

It was his fault!

It's her fault!

Do I look like I care?

Shut up and come fix my husband!

Oh...

Hey.

I spoke to the radiologist, and Harley's arm isn't broken.

Oh, thank God.

(chuckles)

Uh, look, I get how it must look to you.

Okay? I'm the dad who left his family and now I want back in.

Look, I don't know you.

But I care about Vivian and I care about Wade.

And you can't keep just playing with people's feelings like this.

No, I'm not playing.

I've never been more serious about anything.

Vivian, she's my true love.

All right? All I want to do is make her remember how good things were and can be again.

And I know you and Wade are close.

And he's a good guy.

But we're a family and we deserve another chance.

Winifred: Oh, hey.

That's right.

I bought a guilt gift.

And I bought doughnuts.

What's going on with you two?

Nothing.

No.

Come on. Let's sit.

Lemon?

I think I'm gonna go.

Tell your dad thanks for trying.

Lemon: Wait!

♪

That is so sweet.

(giggling)

I don't think it'll work, though.

I mean, neither one of us knows how to lead.

Oh, honey, speak for yourself.

♪

WOMAN (over P.A.): Dr. Kravitz, you have a visitor in the main lobby.

Daddy, I had stitches!

Oh. Come here, my brave guy.

Oh!

Just glad you're all right.

I love you.

I love you, too.

Vivian: My, don't forget about me.

Yeah. Let me see. Lift up?

Yeah.

That hurt?

No, not anymore.

Oh, real tough guy.

Huh?

Vivian: Very.

(laughter)

Charles: We got to get him back out on the diamond.

You should see him hit a ball...

Vivian: Maybe let's not...

Are you okay?

Oh, yeah.

(indistinct chatter)

Could you just... tell them that I had to go?

(laughs) Amazingness.

Kicked out of two clubs in one night.

Yeah, see, that's gonna happen when you insist on calling a bouncer "Tiny" repeatedly.

That's...

(laughter)

Bouncers-- you know, just no appreciation for irony.

At all. None.

Tequila makes me hungry.

Where can a girl get a snack?

Well, miss, it is your lucky night, because I happen to know a gentleman who owns half a restaurant.

Really?

Yeah.

Come on.

I just don't know what to do.

I mean, it's right there in the Bible.

"Let there be light." But it doesn't say who gets the light.

Lavon, A.B.-- they're both my friends, but I don't...

Tom. Tom, Tom, you are babbling again.

Now, think about the calming ocean and waves lapping on the shore.

Can you hear that?

I do. I do.

Of course, now I have to pee.

Oh.

Look at him! Look at what y'all did!

Wanda, yelling is counterproductive.

Sorry.

It's not me. It's my ovaries yelling.

Hey, buddy.

How we doing?

Work faster!

Okay, uh, listen to me, Tom.

I don't want you to worry about the lights anymore, okay?

Go and do the Belle Show.

No, no, do the Owl show.

Another choice?

What if maybe...

We combine our shows and-and we do 'em together?

Maybe we do them outside during the day, and we won't even need lights at all!

So, now you don't want my lights?

Okay.

Annabeth: No, no, no.

We love... we love your lights. Um, we just...

We don't want you to be concerned.

Lavon: Right. The only spotlight you should be worried about is the one that you're gonna use... to make a baby.

Brick: What?

Ew, Lavon.

No. That worked.

Okay, good enough for me.

I love y'all, but everybody out!

Oh.

Now!

You know I love you.

I do. I... Mm.

Mmm.

(goat bleats)

Out!

(sighs)

(whooping)

Ah!

Ah!

(humming)

(laughter)

Seventh place!

It's a miracle.

I know.

Oh, Lemon, I can't thank you enough.

Tonight has been a dream come true.

I only hope one day I can return the favor.

Well, now that you mention it, you could reinspect Fancie's.

Sure. Let's do it.

Really? But it's after midnight.

I'll never be in a happier mood.

Well... let's go.

Okay, come on.

(playing gentle melody)

(knocking)

Hey.

Hey, Doc. Where you been?

The hospital.

Harley fell off the jungle gym.

But he's okay.

He just needed some stitches.

Geez Louise, poor kid.

Uh, you know, I should...

I should call Viv.

You know what? They're...

They're probably exhausted.

Right. Yeah, yeah.

Hey, uh, did you... did you have a chance to put in a word for me?

I didn't.

Okay, well, uh, no rush, I guess.

Actually, Wade, I don't think there's much of a point.

What do you mean?

(clears throat)

Okay, look, I'm your friend, so that's why I think this should come from me.

I don't see this turning out for you.

Charles and Vivian are getting back together.

No.

No, I me...Viv-Viv and I-- we-we have... we have something.

We have something real.

No, I-I'm sure you do.

Just, Charles is moving away, and eventually Vivian's going to go with him.

You know, Wade, I saw them all together tonight...

Wow. You know, uh, on second thought, Zoe, I... I don't think I need your help anymore.

Excuse me.

Wade.

(door slams)

It already looks great.

Oh. (laughs)

No condiments left on the tables, unrefrigerated.

(laughs)

(clinking)

What was that?

(dishes and glassware clattering and clinking)

Sounds like some kind of animal.

(laughs)

No, trust me, there are no animals in this restaurant.

George: You're gonna get it now.

Lulabelle: Stop it! Get away! Don't do it!

GEORGE (laughing): Oh, you are gonna get it now.

If you do it, I'm gonna get you back then.

I'm gonna get you.

You are gonna get it.

You are gonna get it.

I am. Watch this.

George: Are you kidding me?

Lulabelle: No, I'm not. Stop.

You are gonna get it.

(laughing)

I'm gonna get you.

(laughing)

(chuckles softly)

I stand corrected.

Whipped cream, anyone?

Dr. Breeland, Wanda and I just wanted to say thank you for your help last night.

Well, it's not your typical house call, but I am here to serve.

The visualizing helped quite a bit.

This mind is a very powerful tool.

(laughs)

Very powerful.

Wanda: Dr. Breeland doesn't want to hear about your tools over breakfast.

Anyway, hope to be seeing a lot more of you in the next nine months.

Fingers crossed.

Hmm.

Uh, look, A.B., I know I apologized about being a jackass about your new boyfriend, but I also know that I wouldn't have accepted my apology either.

I stepped over the line.

I wish I hadn't.

But I-I hope that we can be friends again.

I guess we kind of have to, if only for the sake of the town, right?

LulaBelle tells me she had a great time last night.

She also said y'all managed to get in some Bible study.

Is that true?

She wouldn't lie to a man of the cloth.

Would she? We-we had a... a great time, and I wanted to thank you for the introduction. - Mm.

'Cause, as it turns out, a-a little bit of, uh, Bible study is-is all I needed.

Well, that's a good thing, 'cause that sheep you were talking about?

She's...

(à la sheep): baaack!

Our new health inspection report came in.

You want to guess what we got?

We got a "C," George!

A "C" for health, thanks to you and your culinary debauchery in the kitchen!

I had to sweet-talk her out of an "F"!

Well, that's... I mean, well, that's good news.

(laughing): Silver linings.

Oh, you think that this is funny?!

No.

Then why are you smiling?

(laughing): Because I...

I am highly annoyed with you right now.

That's all I am feeling is a... is a very high level of annoyance.

La-dee-dee-da and happy day for you.

George, you own that "C""

That "C" is all your fault.

And you better start thinking about how you're gonna raise that grade.

Will do, Lemon. I got it.

George, where are you going?

I am not done with you yet.

(knocking)

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

Didn't Vivian call you?

Yeah, she left a message, said to call.

I figured I'd just stop by in person.

Oh, God.

Hey, Viv?

Wade, Vivian-- she went away for the weekend... with Charles.

They're looking for houses in Baton Rouge, and I'm watching Harley while she's gone.

Went out of town with Charles?

No. No way. I don't believe you.

I'm so sorry.

You're sorry?

You could have stopped this.

She would have listened to you.

That is not fair, Wade.

What was I supposed to do?

One favor, Zoe.

I asked you one favor.

After everything we've been through.

But I saw what you were up against, and it wouldn't have worked.

No, no, that wasn't your call to make!

Shh.

Hey, Wade.

Hey.

Hey, little buddy.

Uh... wow.

Look at those stitches.

I, uh... I got you something.

Whoa!

It's just like yours?

Yeah, remote control and everything. Hope you like it.

Awesome. Thank you.

Hey, did you hear?

We're moving to Baton Rouge.

Wow.

Yeah. Yeah, you know, that's... that's a great place.

I think you'll really like it.

Yeah.

Um... you know, I should... I should...

I should get going.

So, uh, I'll see you later, all right?

All right.

All right.

Yeah.