03x03 - Odd Couples

[bunniefuu]

How do you all feel about Marc and Scotty living here with us?

Awesome!

Previously on Mistresses...

I'd appreciate if you adjusted your tone.

I'll kiss your ass all day long if you decide my wife is worthy of being saved.

Why would you do this for me?

I want to be of use. I want to believe in something.

I love you. And I know that I'm gonna be with you. But now right now.

This Harry must be something pretty special.

He is.

Are you Harry Davis?

I've heard a lot about you.

[Luca snoring]

[Grunts]

[Snoring]

[Snores loudly]

[Murmurs]

Lucy, we're leaving in five minutes! Get a move on!

Lucy: I'll be ready when I'm ready!

[Door slams]

[Sighs]

[Sighs]

[Snoring]

[Snoring]

Marc. Marc.

[Sighs]

Get up.

[Sighs]

[Groans]

Oh.

Scotty.

Scotty.

Just to be clear, Marc, I am not your alarm clock.

I've had to wake you up the last three days.

It's your responsibility to get Scotty off to school on time, not mine.

I'm not much of a morning person.

I didn't process a lot of what you just said.

Uh, I think now would be a good time for us to talk about a game plan.

Miranda's gone for the next... what?... Three months.

[Teakettle whistling]

Maybe now would be a good time for you to look for some kind of job.

Something to get you out of the house, give your day a little structure?

[Water pours]

Structure.

Right.

It doesn't even have to be full time.

Just something to frame the day.

Gotcha. I'll... I'll get right on that.

[Sighs]

Alec: Procedure will take anywhere from four to six hours.

The blood will be taken from your right arm and go through a centrifugal system here, which basically means the stem cells will be separated from your blood.

I've already read up on the procedure, Alec, so you don't have to go through it.

Blood will then re-enter your left arm, minus your stem cells.

You'll probably experience fatigue as the day wears on and quite possibly pain during the procedure, but we can only give you Tylenol.

We can't contaminate the...

Why do you do that?

Do what?

That "talking down to the patient" thing that you're doing.

You do remember I'm a doctor, right?

Eh, a psychiatrist isn't exactly the same kind of doctor, now, is it?

Nurse will take you from here.

See you on the other side.

Are you ready?

Yeah, let me just grab something to read first.

Sorry. You have to keep your arms out straight.

But you can watch TV.

We only get a few channels on this thing, but I think "Judge Judy" should be on.

No, thanks.

[Indistinct talking over P.A. in distance]

[Monitor beeping]

All right.

If you need anything, just hit this button here.

[Sighs]

Calista: Can you tell me what room he's in?

[Knocking on door]

[Indistinct conversation]

Joss: Oh! Hey, Wil!

Is our, uh, little lady ready to get her soul cycle on?

[Door closes]

It's Wil-son.

You and I, we are not yet on an abbreviating basis.

No problemo, Wilsonian.

See what I did there?

I made it longer.

There is no way that Calista is spinning with you today, okay?

She is presenting her spring line to Ken Downing tomorrow.

Well, she texted me this morning saying that we're on, so...

Ken Downing.

Director of Neiman Marcus?

Wow?

"Wow" is what you say when your parents let you ride a pony.

Mr. Downing is only the tastemaker of fashion.

All right? Runway today, real way tomorrow.

No, there is no excuse for that!

That's my cue to leave.

[Chortles]

No, you don't have to tell me it is the 11th hour.

I'm well aware of that fact.

You know what? You know what, Ed?

It's an excuse.

And it's one frigging excuse after another frigging excuse.

And you know what? I am tired of it.

I am tired of it. You're fired.

[Beep]

We're supposed to go spinning!

Crap! I'm so sorry!

No, no, no, don't worry about it.

You're obviously having a morning.

[Voice breaking] But, hey, if it makes you feel any better, that dress is so beautiful I want to cry.

Thank you, but no one's ever gonna see it.

[Sighs]

Ooh. Why not?

[Sighs]

My imbecile of an event planner, he never secured the venue, so the "W" fell through, and we're out, and I am screwed.

Uh, hello? I also plan events.

Venues are my bread and butter.

I... there's a million people that owe me.

Let me just make a few phone calls.

Seriously?

Yeah.

You're hired.

You don't have to pay me, Calista.

I'm happy to do it as your friend.

No, don't... don't you dare.

What? What did I...

You never ever work for free.

Your time is worth something, especially when you're launching a new business, understood?

Listen, if you take you seriously, then the rest of the world is going to.

All righty, then.

I will heed your sage advice.

And... and I will start charging you... [Cellphone chimes] ... Right after I text Harry back.

Harry?

Since when are we talking to Harry?

Since he called me the other night.

We... we... I haven't seen him. We're just texting and talking.

What? You don't think that I should be doing that?

You know, what I think doesn't matter.

Um, Eva, you're done. You could, um...

Go give the dress to Wilson. He's in the other room.

Look, you're the one who said you wanted some time before you committed to Harry.

I'm just repeating what you told me.

Well... [Sighs]

I mean, that is what I said I wanted, but then, uh, we just sort of fell back into it, you know, the way that we were, because he's my best friend.

I don't even remember why we're not together right now.

[Sighs]

Well, because you felt guilty about Savi and you wanted this relationship to be a choice rather than a reaction to a wedding that you didn't want.

You're right.

I did say that.

Which means no talking, no texting. If you want a break, then take a real break.

It's the only way to know for sure.

You're right.

Again.

Okay, great.

All right, now, please, let's talk venues.

Oh, um, literally give me two seconds. Watch what happens.

[Knock on door]

[Sighs]

[Sighs]

Sorry. I'm a little late opening up today.

Busy morning.

You, uh, need anything in particular?

Uh, no, Mrs. Malloy, I'm not here to shop.

I'm from the Western Majestic Life Insurance Company.

We were recently informed by the FBI that your husband, Paul, did not in fact perish in a boating accident in 2010.

[Sighs]

So the death benefit in the amount of $200,000 we paid you back in 2012 is null and void.

You have 30 days to pay it back.

My card's attached.

Call me if you have any questions.

[Breathes deeply]

How do they expect me to come up with $200,000 just like that?

Sorry, you... are you comfortable?

Hmm, yes.

But you two really don't need to be fussing over me.

Honey, if there's ever a time to accept pampering, it's after giving your magic, lifesaving blood for six hours to a virtual stranger.

Are you sure you don't want another blanket?

I'm fine.

Now, tell me what the insurance woman said to you.

The FBI told them that Paul didn't die in a boating accident, and now they want their money back... end of story.

Did they miss the chapter where he's dead now and that he was m*rder*d?

They should be giving you more money, not taking it away.

Exactly!

I spent that money when I thought Paul was dead and my whole world fell apart.

I can't get that year and a half of my life back, but they want their money back?

They don't care that I had to hold my crying daughter every night so she can go to sleep.

[Voice breaking] That I am still repairing the damage that all of this has done to Lucy and me!

[Sighs]

Sit down. It's okay.

Come here.

[Sighs]

I'd be happy to give you a loan.

[Sighs] N... no.

I couldn't do that to our friendship, but thank you.

Well, it's too bad I can't ask Calista for a loan, 'cause she's loaded.

Is that why you hang out with her?

I'm not gonna lie... it doesn't suck being treated to lunches at the Ivy, but, no, it's... it's way more than that. She's unbelievable.

She's super-smart, and I'm learning a ton from her.

I just... she's somebody I aspire to be.

I don't know. I'm... I'm really excited for you to meet her.

Hopefully soon, before I have to file for bankruptcy and move to a cheaper state.

It won't come to that.

But I do think it's time you hire yourself a good lawyer.

[Sighs]

I wish Savi were here right now.

[Indistinct conversations]

♪ welcome ♪
♪ come sit down ♪

Hey. Niko.

Hey! It's the man of the hour!

Ellis.

Whoa, no! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! What's the hurry?

Hey, I wanted to tell you what, uh, the investors thought of your amusing bouches and all the other things you prepared for them the other night.

Mm!

Oh, that's good.

They think that you are a genius.

Genius, huh?

Mm-hmm.

Wow. Uh, disposable one week, genius the next? Okay.

[Chuckles] You know, I never pegged you for the sensitive type, Harry. Come on.

If we're gonna get along, you got to toughen up, dude.

We're gonna fight. I promise you that.

You're gonna throw a punch.

I might throw a punch. [Chuckles]

But when I tell you what I'm about to tell you, I think that you're gonna want to hug me.

Pb-b-b-ht!

I highly doubt that, Ellis.

Oh, yeah? Okay.

L.A. Magazine just named you, Harry Davis, one of the top 10 best chefs in Los Angeles.

[Imitates expl*si*n]

Really?

Yes, really!

They're coming tomorrow to do a photo sh**t.

This is a really big deal for us.

Big deal for you, too, Harry, you know?

So I want you to enjoy the limelight.

Okay? 'Cause you've earned it, my friend.

Oh, yeah, come on. Bring it in.

N-no, I couldn't...

Bring it in. Yeah, you.

I can't, mate. No. Just...

Ohh.

[Sighs]

Joss?

[Sighs]

[Knock on door]

[Knocking continues]

[Sighs]

Hi.

[Sighs]

[Bells jingle]

Hola!

Oh, my god! This place is adorbs!

[Laughs] Thank you so much for meeting me here.

I am short-staffed today. It's no problem at all.

I love an excuse to get out of that office.

It's so brown.

[Both chuckle]

And Dom apologizes for not being here, but I feel he did me a favor by recommending me.

Pro Bono cases are so boring, but, I mean, reading your case file, it's like watching one of my favorite telenovelas.

[Inhales sharply] Oh, you love the drama.

And speaking of drama, I hear Savi is missing?

Not missing... traveling.

Can we stick to me and my case, please?

Oh, of course. Yes.

So [Sighs] have a seat.

Yes, thank you.

Mm-hmm.

So, what's our plan of att*ck?

Well, it's pretty straightforward.

The insurance company wants their $200,000 back.

We'll tell them what we can pay, they'll counter.

And in the end we'll just reach a happy median.

Oh no. There is no median.

Okay, so, what can you afford?

Nothing.

What little money I had left, after buying the shop, was set aside for Lucy's college fund, and I don't want to touch that.

Besides, this wasn't my fault.

Can't you make them see that?

It's a big insurance company, April. All they see is numbers.

But I see it.

And I love a good challenge.

[Sighs] Really?

Yes, I'll take your case.

Let's just go over the facts one more time.

So, he d*ed... the first time. Then what?

Breathe.

[Breathes deeply]

Yeah.

Knew you'd feel worse today.

It's always the second day.

Well, you could have warned me about that. [Sighs]

I believe you interrupted me before I got to that part... something about you being a doctor and knowing everything already.

[Pumping]

Your blood pressure is too low.

That's why you feel like crap.

[Velcro rips]

Why are you here, again?

I called several times. You didn't answer.

Why are you here alone?

Excuse me?

After a major procedure, why is there not someone here with you?

That's not very responsible of you.

I have a friend staying with me.

Is she here?

She had to work.

So you are in fact alone.

Yes, but...

You know where Vivian is right now after her end of the procedure?

She's in the hospital, surrounded by doctors and nurses.

And you're here without so much as a house cat.

If you're trying to make me feel worse, you have.

Congratulations.

[Sighs]

Look, you can leave now. I'm fine.

Are you aware your foot's bleeding?

Yes. I-i am.

Yes, this is Dr. Adams.

Cancel my 11:00 A.M. and my noon...

Ow.

... and my 2:00. Thank you.

[Sighs]

♪ Whoo, child ♪
♪ baby, give me diamonds ♪
♪ give me gold ♪

Ooh.

Okay, guys, can we just finish this up here?

Chairs, about 40 on either side.

Can you just move that a little to the left?

Wait, that looks good. Ow. Hi.

Can you just show me? That's blinding.

Just perfect.

And then just match... please don't fall.

It's very expensive.

[Cellphone ringing]

Uh...

♪ Gave it all I got ♪

Oh.

♪ It seemed the best to me ♪

Ah. Hey, you.

Thank god you picked up. I need your help.

What? Oh, my god, are you okay? What's wrong?

I don't know what shirt to wear.

Okay.

I'm not sure that that constitutes an emergency.

Harry, I'm kind of in the middle of something right now, so...

Yeah, I know it's stupid, but I've been chosen by L.A. Magazine as one of the top 10 chefs in L.A.

They're coming to the restaurant today for a photo sh**t, and I've got no idea what I'm supposed to wear. Help.

Oh, my God, are you serious?! That's incredible!

Well, you know, who knows who actually reads these bloody things, right?

Are... um, everyone that eats at a restaurant.

That's who.

Well, that's... that's great.

Now I'm even more worried.

I'm sorry. Don't be.

It's just, um... I'm sure that they'll have a stylist go through your stuff or bring clothes or whatever.

Right. Yeah, of course. Stylist.

Good. Thank you.

Why didn't you tell me about this before?

Well, I didn't want to seem like a w*nk*r.

A... w*nk*r?

Yeah, you know, braggy.

Okay, well, for the record, you are so not braggy.

As a matter of fact, you could stand to be a little more...

Braggy. [Chuckles]

We'll work on that, you know?

Okay.

[Thud]

Uh, yeah.

Uh, anyway, um, I got to... I got to go, so...

Yeah, you know what? Why don't you stop by the sh**t?

Yeah...

It could be fun, right?

I would be a hell of a lot more relaxed if you were there.

Uh, you know what?

I-I'm actually on a job right now, and it's... it's an insane day, so...

Okay, yeah, no. I'll... I'll call you later.

You know what? Don't.

Um, it's... I just... I think this thing's gonna run all day and then through the night, and I just... maybe it's... it's better if you don't call.

Sure. Yeah. Of course. No.

U... you... yeah, just buzz me when you can.

No sweat.

Okay, I will.

Okay.

[Indistinct conversations]

[Dogs barking]

[Glass shatters]

[Marc whistling]

[Metal clangs]

[Sizzling]

[Barking continues]

Um... Marc?

[Timer rings]

Hey.

Aah!

Ah. I got a job.

No, make that multiple jobs.

I got them off busy beaver.

Busy what?

Uh, it's like Craigslist, but for errands and stuff.

You won't believe what people will pay you to do.

I already earned 150 bucks just for that.

Although that Dollhouse is way more complicated than it looks.

I mean, we're talking Ikea-level hard.

Hmm. [Sighs]

[Barking continues]

And the dogs? Why are they here?

Maurice and Leroy? [Chuckles]

They can't stay home alone.

They get too depressed when their owner, Patrice, goes to the office.

Their Xanax stopped working.

I know. Beverly Hills dogs. Go figure.

[Whimpering]

No. No, no, no, no, no! Marc!

Oh. Hang on.

Ohh!

I think he's all done. Sorry.

You know, when I suggested you get a job, I thought that you would go to the job.

Yeah, that's not really what busy beaver's about.

Do you know what? I-I'm gonna call my friend Harry.

He runs a restaurant.

Maybe he can find something for you because this... this is not gonna be happening in my house.

Are you okay? You seem a little on edge.

I'm fine.

If you want to talk about it...

I said I'm fine! Clean that up, please!

[Groans]

[Door closes]

Ellis: Did I tell you, or did I tell you?

The hottest staff in town.

I mean, go ahead. Take your pick.

Oh, and there's our Adonis now... rock-star chef Harry Davis.

Harry, I'd like you to meet the photographer...

Ted Sorkin.

Ted Sorkin.

Good buddy of mine.

Nice to meet you. Welcome.

You look great.

[Chuckles] Ty!

Let's go ahead and get you into these little bad boys.

Wow. What... ?

[Both chuckle]

What is this?

This is your wardrobe.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

Wh... uh...

Wait, w-why would I wear a pair of star-spangled underpants for this photo sh**t?

'Cause we're hitting the newsstands in July, baby.

Right?

[Chuckles] Yep.

But what... what's this got to do with top 10 chefs in L.A.?

Top 10 sexiest chefs in L.A.

[Clicks tongue]

[Groans]

[Stammers]

Hold that thought.

Yeah. I'll give you a moment.

You said "top 10 chefs in L.A."

Did I?

Yeah.

No, I'm pretty sure I said "hottest"...

No, no, you distinctly said "top 10 chefs in L.A."

Eh, tomato, "tomahto."

[Scoffs]

But you know what they say?

All press is good press. So just come on.

Relax. Okay?

Have fun. Gee.

[Indistinct conversations]

I cannot believe what you have done with this place!

This is crazy! 24 hours?!

You are a genius.

Oh, I wouldn't say "genius," but if you want to, then...

Genius!

[Chuckles]

Thank you. Seriously. So much.

No. Oh, no.

I-I'm actually the one who should be grateful because I've been so busy today that I've actually stopped thinking about Harry for five seconds.

Hallelujah! Thank you, Jesus!

I- know. [Chuckles]

Oh, my god.

I mean, yeah, he's... he's hot and everything, especially with that sexy accent.

Wait a second. No, wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Huh?

What?

Um, the... did you see Harry somewhere?

Oh, went to the restaurant last week.

W-why?

Um, well, you talking about him so much, so I figured I had to, you know, check out the goods.

You would have done the same thing.

Uh... I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't.

It's not a big deal, Joss, seriously.

But you know what? It is a big deal.

I did see a certain dynamic between him and that bartender.

I think I just saved you a whole bunch of heartbreak.

Meaning what?

What? Meaning... meaning nothing.

I'm just saying, you know, you should probably let him gets his rocks off before you two settle in.

You should do the same. Wish I could do the same.

Okay, uh... [Clears throat]

Let me get this straight, Calista, you... you stalked Harry like a week ago and... ?

I'm sorry. I didn't... I didn't stalk anybody.

It's not like I was lurking in a bush somewhere.

The restaurant is up the street from my house.

I went in, sat at the bar, and had a drink.

Yeah, but, Calista, it's still a little weird.

It happened over a week ago, and you're just telling me now?

A-actually, you... you didn't even tell me.

It just sort of slipped out, so I...

Let's not get all dramatic.

I am your friend, Joss. I'm just trying to protect you.

I mean, the guy is on the verge of having the biggest career moment of his life.

It's like dating Justin Timberlake before he went solo.

I should know. I... the little songbird broke my heart.

You know what, Calista?

You have no idea the kind of person that Harry is, or me, for that matter, and I don't need your advice on how to handle my relationships.

I'll take it from here, okay?

Here you go.

[Cellphone ringing]

Hello?

Hi! I have great news!

Already? I didn't think you'd hear back so fast.

Well, I got the insurance company to agree to half the total amount you owe.

Even better, you can pay in installments.

Uh, that wasn't what we talked about, Toni.

The deal was I pay nothing.

You said that, mama, not me.

Usually, you have to pay something.

Trust me, this is a fair deal, considering the situation.

[Sighs] The situation is I can't.

My store is barely breaking even.

I was a stay-at-home mom before all of this happened, so I don't exactly have a fallback plan.

[Bells jingle]

Go back to them and work something out.

I need you to do better, Toni.

You got somewhere you need to be?

As a matter of fact, I have a date tonight.

Is it a first date?

Yes, it's a blind date.

Well, you should definitely cancel.

You look like hell.

Do people often compliment you on your bedside manner?

99% of a relationship's longevity depends on the first impression.

I'm 99% sure you made that up.

Honestly, how did you land Vivian?

Because first impressions aren't really your thing.

I was actually on a date with somebody else.

Why am I not surprised?

We had tickets to the ballet.

Snore. And that's when it happened.

That's when I saw her.

She came on the stage, and she was... Stunning, graceful and perfect and walking on air.

It was like suddenly, the whole room disappeared, and she was dancing just for me.

And then out of nowhere, she fell.

I remember I heard a gasp from the crowd, but...

I was already out of my seat and halfway to the stage.

I used the magic words, "I am a doctor," to rush into the wings.

I scooped her up, wrapped her knee, and... Refused to leave until she agreed to a first date.

What about the other girl?

No idea.

After I saw Vivian, there were no other girls.

[Up-tempo music plays]

[Laughter]

[Indistinct conversations]

How are we doing? Good?

Good. Yeah.

Great, great, great. Great, great, great.

Okay. Good.

Good, good.

Good. Good.

What is this? Good.

What? Why?

Why is your hair down?

Denise.

I just thought since the dress was flowing, my hair should be, too.

Well, models aren't paid to think.

Good reason for that. Denise, really?

I'm sorry. We... we can fix it.

Yeah. I just need to grab my pins.

Okay, go ahead. Come on. Turn around.

Men like women with their hair down.

At least your husband does.

[Scoffs]

Okay.

You know, forget it. Forget it, Denise.

You can... you can wear your hair just like that.

And you can go.

And don't ever come back.

Go now.

Anyone else have anything to say?

No. Okay.

[Sighs]

So, who are you not calling?

A friend.

A friend who might be able to help me figure out the best way to get out of this without ruining my reputation for life.

But you can't call this friend.

Nope.

I cannot. Not allowed.

So, talk to me.

Well, the truth is, Niko, I thought this magazine article was a legitimate honor, a way to wipe the slate clean, you know?

Start over.

Start over from what?

I lost my restaurant last year.

I let my personal issues get in the way, and pow!

Anyway, I thought this might help get me back on top.

But it's just a joke. The whole thing is a joke.

And if I put those ridiculous knickers on, joke's on me, right?

You don't get many third chances in this business.

You can keep your pants on, tiger.

I got this.

[g*nf*re]

[Mid-tempo music plays]

Come on! [Sighs]

Marc, what are you doing?

Oh, it's another busy beaver gig.

I'm helping this kid, Bobby, from the valley.

Ohh!

Didn't think I saw that coming, did you, little punk ass?

Poor kid's getting bullied at school 'cause his scores are so low, but not anymore.

I thought you were meeting Harry for a job at Wunderbar.

He said they needed people.

Yeah, well...

See, I had to cancel 'cause of the whole Bobby thing.

You canceled?

I did you a favor!

I put myself on the line for you, and you blew it off to play video games?

No. L-look, I'm sorry.

I'm always trying to do the right thing, always putting other people's needs before my own.

Do you know that I broke up with my boyfriend last week just so Lucy wouldn't be upset?

I did not know that.

Well, I did because I am a selfless person.

And what do I get in return?

Screwed! That's what!

Man: You lose.

Sorry, Bobby.

Game over.

What the hell, man? Why isn't he dressed?

I'll handle this.

Harry, my man.

Given pretty clear directions, no?

Eh, tomatoes, "tomahtas."

Niko: Ellis.

All right.

What do you think of this?

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh ♪
♪ oh-oh, oh-oh ♪

You see?

She knows how to take directions!

Actually, we came up with something else... something way sexier.

♪ But I am running now ♪

Kind of, uh, James Bond, don't you think?

Yes.

Perfect. Love it.

[Camera shutter clicking]

♪ don't believe ♪
♪ everything that you hear about me ♪

Yes.

Maybe just get a little closer on his neck.

♪ Don't believe ♪

I want to feel it.

Oh, gorgeous.

[Laughs]

♪ Everything that you hear about me ♪

Harry, uncross your arms.

Turn your shoulder a little into him.

Sorry for invading your space all day.

It's okay. I should probably be thanking you.

Agreed.

[Chuckles]

But it wasn't entirely selfless.

I spoke to Vivian's primary yesterday.

We may need more cells.

In most cases, the procedure we did yesterday results in all the cells a patient needs, but Vivian's system is so depleted...

[Sighs] ... We may need more.

I know you've been through a lot.

We'll wait an extra cycle if necessary.

I don't want to push you.

Thank you.

[Sighs]

[Door opens]

[Sighs]

Uh... Hi.

Where have you been all day long?

Next time be a little more considerate and check in.

What was that?

That was Alec... Dr. Adams.

He came by to check on me.

Oh, my god! Why didn't you call me?!

You said you were okay.

I was going to, but then he showed up and never left.

Hmm... Well, that's, uh, one hell of a house call from the husband of the woman whose life you're saving.

You're reading this all wrong.

I'm not reading anything into you.

I'm just saying that all men are rats, and they're not to be trusted.

You want to talk about it?

[Sighs] No. I want a drink.

There's a Pinot on the counter, but if you don't need me, I'm gonna go to bed.

Oh, honey, I always need you, but I think you should get some sleep.

My problem will still be here in the morning.

[Chuckles] As will yours.

I don't have a problem.

Says you.

Night!

Night.

[Cellphone ringing]

Hmm? Hello?

Oh, you have to get back here right now!

It is really bad, and it's not my job to fix it.

Besides, you know, I-I've already tried talking...

Wilson?

Who else do you think it is, okay?

Calista has locked herself in a bathroom.

Now get back here.

Uh...

Well, I'm sorry to hear that, but it's not really my problem.

Actually, you know what... it is your problem because you took a job and that job is not done!

Now, if this whole show blows up, Calista Raines will find a way to make sure that Josslyn Carver never works in this town again.

Now, if I were you, I'd fix it.

[Click]

W...

[Door opens, closes]

April: Hey.

You and Scotty want to join us for dinner?

Oh, no, thanks. We're headed out for pizza.

[Sighs]

Marc, um...

I'm sorry, okay?

I shouldn't have gone off on you like that.

It had nothing to do with you.

I'm just going through some stuff right now.

But I shouldn't have blown up at you the way I did.

No, it's all right.

I... look, I'm sorry I didn't meet with your friend Harry.

It's just that...

I don't know if I can work in a restaurant again.

I'm... I'm three years sober, April.

Oh.

My god. I'm... I'm sorry. I had no idea.

Yeah, I don't usually lead with that.

[Clears throat] And... and look.

Thanks for asking your friend, but...

The restaurant industry, it's kind of a whole scene, you know?

[Sighs]

I'm not sure that's the best environment for me right now.

No, of course. I'm so sorry.

Oh, please don't... don't be sorry. I'm not.

I spent years feeling sorry for myself, blaming everyone for why I drank.

It's the restaurant industry.

I got an alcoholic dad, an alcoholic grandfather.

Hey, I'm Irish. Damn genetics. It's not my fault.

But the truth is...

I had a part in it, too.

Look, I... I know what I must look like.

You know, some odd-jobs loser driving around in a rusty old R.V. [Clears throat]

But this is me taking responsibility for me...

And making a life on my own terms.

Once I owned up to it, I was free.

So...

Scotty: I'm ready.

Ready to go?

Yep.

All right, let's get some food, huh?

Bye, April.

Mm-hmm.

See you later.

Bye.

Come on!

[Door opens, closes]

Hi.

Go.

Hello.

I'm here.

Thank god!

Where is she?

Follow me.

Hmm. What's going on?

Shouldn't the show already be started by now?

[Sighs]

I-I don't even know why I care anymore, really.

I really don't.

I mean, to keep letting him hurt me.

Who?

Luca.

You know what?

He could pick anybody, but this time it was like he wanted to humiliate me.

He wanted to punish me.

He's cheated before, but never with someone I work with.

Never. He screwed Eva, my top model.

And she flaunted it in my face in front of everyone.

Well, I didn't have a choice. I had to fire her.

What? Yeah. Of course you did.

Are you kidding me? You're Calista Raines.

Mm.

Fire 'em all.

Yeah. I'm Calista Raines.

Famous. Wealthy.

No. Really, I'm Carla Rizzotti from Queens.

No matter what, I'm just this...

Chubby little kid with a big nose and a chip on her shoulder.

You don't have a big nose.

No.

Not after the best plastic surgeon money can buy.

Little harder to change what's on the inside, though.

You know what?

Personally, I am looking forward to, uh, getting to know this Carla Rizzotti, right?

But at another time.

'Cause listen to me, there are a ton of people out there waiting for one hell of a show from Calista Raines, okay?

So let's... what? What? Luca? Come on. Just...

Let's get up. Let's go find you another model.

What do you think Wilson and I have been trying to do for the last three hours?

It's not that easy to find a 6-foot-tall size 2...

Hmm.

[Camera shutters clicking]

♪ You make me want to live forever ♪
♪ you're my remedy to yesterday ♪
♪ now this trouble seems so far away ♪
♪ like you'll never be the same ♪
♪ living it up, living it up, living it up ♪
♪ life ain't a party ♪
♪ you're the passion by my side ♪

[Applause]

♪ mm ♪
♪ living it up, living it up, living it up ♪
♪ life ain't a party ♪
♪ you're the passion by my side ♪
♪ love comes close to you ♪
♪ your love, it makes me stronger ♪
♪ no matter what we're going through ♪
♪ I won't look back ♪
♪ won't look, won't look back ♪
♪ I won't look back ♪
♪ won't look, won't look back ♪

[Cheers and applause]

Mm, are you already going back to work?

Shouldn't you be taking it easy?

It's a short shift.

Besides, I feel so much better.

Yeah? Thanks to a little TLC maybe?

[Slurps]

It's not often that a doctor makes house calls outside of reruns of "Little House on the Prairie."

Admit it, Karen, it's a little weird.

It's not like that. If you knew them... they have the most beautiful marriage.

Mm-hmm.

It's actually giving me something to aspire to.

Okay.

Now, I want to hear about what happened with you last night.

Ugh.

[Knocking on door]

[Door opens]

You must be Karen. I'm Calista.

Nice to meet you. I've heard so much about you.

Oh, well, hope it hasn't been all terrible.

Not at all.

I'm gonna be late.

Uh, there's coffee in the pot if you want some.

Thank you.

Well, this is for last night.

Where's the coffee?

I looked for you after the party, but you took off so quick.

Oh, whoa, Calista, this is way too much.

You earned it, Joss.

Mm, yeah, you bailed me out.

You really did.

Hmm.

And that's why I want you to be my event planner.

Full time.

Hmm?

I'm not gonna lie. It is a very demanding job.

But I think you would be amazing.

Unless you're not interested.

No, it's just, uh... It's...

[sighs]

The "stalking Harry" thing made it weird between us?

Yeah, it's a little weird.

I'm sorry.

Look, when I like someone... and it is rare, believe me... then I like them.

I'm an intense person.

My relationships are intense.

I get protective.

Protective of me? I don't... why?

Yes.

I mean, look at you.

You're... you're open and vulnerable and raw.

It's like all your nerves are on the outside of your body, and, you know, I just wanted to make sure he was worthy of you, and then I saw him speaking to that girl, and it annoyed me.

But you know what? It was my own baggage. It really is.

And I looked at Harry through my crap-colored sunglasses because of my situation with Luca, and I shouldn't have.

Thank you. [Chuckles]

And you know what?

I actually think you might be right, so...

I'm sorry?

I went to Wunderbar last night, and there was definitely a dynamic.

Okay, so... What?

She's into him.

Mm-hmm.

Big deal. We don't know if he's into her.

And even if he is into her, we don't know if anything's happened yet.

Come on, it...

But what, Joss, what do you want?

Seriously. Don't think.

Just what do you want?

I want Harry.

Then get him and don't let anybody stand in your way.

Forget it.

Alec: Hey, just checking in.

You probably feel better but still look terrible.

I'm working on my beside manner.

How'd I do?

What are you doing?

Uh... I'm downsizing.

You might see a few changes around here, some, uh, belt tightening.

Is this gonna affect the almond butter?

'Cause I notice you buy the good stuff.

Yep.

Thanks to you and what you shared, I am taking responsibility for my situation.

What situation?

I, uh...

I kept Paul's insurance money, even after I knew Paul wasn't really dead.

I'm basically Carmela Soprano.

Minus the acrylic nails and hot pants.

[Chuckles]

I guess I felt so entitled to my anger, I didn't see my own part in it.

Now I do, so let's just hope we all don't wind up living in your R.V. as a result.

[Chuckles] Well, you're always welcome, but I don't think that's gonna happen...

'Cause I'm turning over a new leaf, too.

What is this?

My share.

As long as Scotty and I are here, I want to contribute to household expenses.

You don't have to do this.

Oh, I know.

That's what makes it so awesome.

I'm basically a saint.

[Chuckles]

Oh, and, uh, I rescheduled that interview with Harry.

I spoke to my sponsor. He thinks I can handle it.

And so do I.

[Stomping on stairs]

Now, that's gonna be a problem.

[Knock on door]

[Sighs]

I thought we weren't talking.

We're not.