01x10 - K-Pop!

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Major Lazer". Aired: April 2015 to June 2015.*
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Set in the future, "Major Lazer" is a Jamaican superhero with a laser g*n for a right hand who fights against the dystopian forces led by Jamaica's leader President Whitewall and his servant General Rubbish. "Major Lazer" is assisted in his fight by President Whitewall's daughter Penny Whitewall and hacker Blkmrkt.
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01x10 - K-Pop!

Post by bunniefuu »

[Warbling, static]

[Theme music playing]

♪ Major... Lazer ♪
♪ Major... Lazer ♪
♪ Major Lazer ♪
♪ Major... Lazer ♪
♪ Major Lazer ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah! ♪
♪ Major Lazer [echoes] ♪


[Buzzing]

Dr. Acid! What is the status of Project X?

The ultimate w*apon that will help me defeat Major Lazer once and for all?

We're still in the testing phase, sir.

We're calibrating his evil software.

I do have something else ready I think you'll find quite interesting.

Oh, my! He's pretty.

But what does he do for us?

K-Pop is a synthetic humanoid.

He has been programmed to sing one song.

It contains a powerful subliminal message
at a frequency that only teenagers can hear.

That message? "k*ll Major Lazer!"

How brilliantly evil! President Whitewall will be most pleased when Major Lazer dies at the hands of his own fan base!

[Both laughing]

I'm a sh**ting star... genuine.

[K-Pop's music plays]

Eh, not bad. Let's see how it works on a teenager.

Hey Penny, come here for a sec.

Hey, Dad. What's up?

I want to play something for you.

Dad, you know we don't have the same taste in music.

Jesus Christ, will you please just sit down and listen?

Okay. Fine.

But keep in mind, it's... ya know, it's just a demo.

[K-Pop's music plays]

♪ Superpower lover ♪
♪ whoa ♪


So uh... ya know, what do you think?

Wow, it's actually pretty catchy.

Great. Does it make you feel anything in particular?

Yeah, it kind of makes me want to k*ll Major Lazer.

Nice.

Okay, is that it?

I got to go finish some homework.

Hey, you know what? [Bleep] homework!

Here's two tickets for tonight's K-Pop show at Splurt Stadium. Bring a friend.

Really?

In fact, hey!

Here's... Here's a bunch of tickets.

Bring the whole g*ng!

[chuckles] Awesome.

I love live music!

Major Lazer is mine!

Aw, man, we're gonna miss the concert!

Hey guys, it's Major Lazer!

Wagwan, teenyboppers?

Our convertible just broke down on the way to the K-Pop concert!

K-Pop? Never heard of him. What him sound like?

We actually don't know, but we heard he's going to be the next big thing.

Irie. Come now. I'mma take you there.

Awesome! Thank you, Major Lazer!

[teen girls chanting] K-Pop! K-Pop! K-Pop!

Sir, K-Pop is fully charged and ready to sing.

Good!

Now go out there and sing your poison song that will k*ll Major Lazer!

[Audience chanting] K-Pop! K-Pop! K-Pop!

K-Pop is forever.


Oh my god, there he is!

♪ Superpower lover ♪
♪ whoa ♪


[K-Pop sings in Korean]

He's so beautiful!

♪ superpower lover ♪
♪ whoa ♪


[K-Pop continues singing in Korean]

♪ hey, sexy lady ♪
♪ my fantasy ♪


[Continues singing in Korean]

[teen girls chanting] k*ll Major Lazer! k*ll Major Lazer! k*ll Major Lazer! k*ll!
Lazer, it's awful quiet out here today.

Yeah, man. The kids all at the K-Pop concert.

There he is! k*ll Major Lazer!

We got to get out of here!

All: k*ll Major Lazer! Die, Lazer, die!

Well done, K-Pop. Your song worked!

The kids loved it! [Laughing]

Thank you, dad. So I was thinking...

Thinking? You weren't programmed to think!

That's the thing. I'm advancing beyond my programming.

I have a feeling now, and I'm generating my own songs.

Here is a song I wrote. About the love.

You're an instrument of hate, not love!

But, dad...

You're a w*apon and that's all you'll ever be!

Now I've got important evil science to do.

So go to your dock, and don't come out until you're fully charged!

Teen girls: k*ll Major Lazer!

k*ll Major Lazer!

k*ll Major Lazer!

k*ll Major Lazer!


[Groans]

Get off me! Ya know I can't fight ya!

[Growls]

[Screaming]

All: k*ll Major Lazer!

All these girls chasing me.

They're all trying to k*ll me.

They're not the only ones.

Impossible! Me thought only girls liked K-Pop!

I have feminine sensibilities.

Kids have gone crazy!

Yeah, crazy for K-Pop.

Ah! [Groans]

President Whitewall: General Rubbish.

Yes, President Whitewall.


This K-Pop kid is incredible.

Just think about all the other subliminal messages we can get him to sing about.

I know! And his song is so catchy...

Hey, hey, hey, Rubbish!

Shut the [bleep] up, I'm still talking!

I'm sorry, my lord. Of course.

I want to get him back in the studio ASAP.

And then, on a non-stop world tour. 24/7, 365.

I love it! Success is at hand!

Teen girls: [chanting] k*ll Major Lazer! k*ll Major Lazer! k*ll Major Lazer!


[Chanting continues]

Is this sadness I feel?

Music isn't supposed to hurt, it's supposed to love.

I have to make this better, I have to save Major Lazer... with my heart.

Oh my god, there's K-Pop!

[K-Pop sings in Korean]

[K-Pop continues singing in Korean]

Dr. Acid!

K-Pop has gone rogue... he's singing a new song.

But that's impossible!

Unleash Project X... Evil Lazer!

Sir, it's too dangerous! He's not fully tested!

[whispers] He's too evil.

How dare you defy my command with your puny science!

Move, bitch! Get out the way!

Turn on now!

[Beeping]

I am Evil Lazer.

And I exist only to k*ll Major Lazer.

Evil Lazer, fly!

[Laughs]

Phew, that was a close one, Major Lazer. I really am very sorry.

Don't worry yourself, little man.

[Alarm wailing]

I am Evil Lazer.

And I exist only to k*ll Major Lazer.

If you want to k*ll Major Lazer, you have to get through me first!

K-Pop, look out!

Blkmrkt, look! Let's go, let's go, let's go!

Hey, that's my car!

[Engine revving]

[Honking]

I will be re...

[Powering down noise]

Ah!

Oh my god, K-Pop!

I'm sorry. I never meant to cause harm... just harmony.

♪ Superpower lover ♪

[K-Pop sings in Korean]

♪ superpower lover ♪
♪ whoa ♪

[K-Pop sings in Korean]

♪ superpower lover ♪
♪ whoa ♪
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