That was our Trev on the phone. She's on her way now.
Then it's Kelly and Shaun from Kelly's mum's at 3:30, and then it's me, you, the g*ng and the open road, mate.
You moving out?
Say again.
I said, are you moving out, duck?
No, what you on?
Why have you packed so many bags?
It's for the rave.
We're only there for one night.
You said it was a nighter so I've brought enough for...
Yeah, a nighter. Not a yearer.
Yeah, but, if you think about it logically, it's a day, a night, and then another day and then...
If you're thinking about it logically, you need underpants, condoms and dr*gs.
They're in the odds and sods bag over there.
That's all you need, then, brother. That's all you need.
Yeah, but...
We need provisions, mate.
Provisions? Like him?
He coming?
Is he coming?
Doesn't have to come.
I weren't set on him.
There's a f*cking bag within a bag here. That's a bag inside a bag.
It's for souvenirs, mate.
In case we see owt for Lolly, Woody and the kids and that.
We're not going to American Adventure.
We're not going to get a picture of your chops going down the log flume.
We're going to a rave. We're going to get out our heads, have a mash up.
I'm just trying to think in case we stay, in case we end up somewhere.
You've thought way too much on this, man.
Way too f*cking much.
I'm going to go for a wank and a sh*t and a bath.
Downsize it a little bit.
Condense it down a bit, brother, because that's just ridiculous.
Music: Hallelujah by Happy Mondays
♪ Hallelujah ♪
♪ Hallelujah ♪
♪ Hallelujah ♪
♪ Hallelujah ♪
♪ Hallelujah ♪
♪ Hallelujah. ♪
Ergh.
That was a bit of a wild one last night, weren't it?
Yeah.
You was a bit wild, anyway.
Do you want me to do some breakfast? I can do a banging bacon butty.
No, mate, honestly, I've really got to go.
f*cking hell, is that the time?
Yep.
Well, can I get your number or summat?
I'm...
I'm never really situated in the same, like, place so that probably wouldn't really work.
Have I done summat wrong?
No. No. Not at all.
I just work with my mum and my sister and they're going to f*cking flip so I'd better go.
Nice to meet you, Stu.
Is it there?
Yeah.
Well, come on. Get it open. We can't eat our dinner till we know.
What if it's a no?
It won't be a no. It'll be a positive.
You were the star pupil on that drama course, Shaun.
Word travels fast, don't it?
It does, yeah.
Well, as long as you know that I tried even if it is a no.
Brilliant. It's a no.
What?
Little sod! He'll have me at it all day.
We're sorry to inform you that, after much consideration, we can't offer you a place on the photography course due to the manner in which you left the drama course back in January, 1989. That's a bloody mistake.
It has to be.
It's not a mistake, is it? It's right. I left the course.
It's a different course, Shaun. They've...
It doesn't matter what course it is. It's the same college.
Shaun, you was in bits over Michelle.
It doesn't matter.
Like they give a f*ck about that. They're not bothered.
I'm going to get Dr Lenny to have a word with...
No, you're not.
Shaun, you was on anti-depressants.
It doesn't matter.
You didn't just bloody swan off.
It doesn't matter. They're not going to take it into consideration.
Just leave it at that.
It does matter.
It doesn't f*cking matter! How many times?
It's my f*cking life! Not yours! It's my fault!
I walked off the f*cking course and I'm not bothered!
I did it to get you off my back anyway!
Fine. Look, just calm down.
I don't care!
Fine.
I don't care!
OK. Now calm down, Shaun.
Shaun, love, I'm sorry. All right, I won't say anything.
It's just the injustice of it, love. It's not right.
It doesn't matter, Mum. It says no. End of.
Gadge, what have we got here?
Survival gear, Trev.
Cousin's in the air cadets so he taught me a thing or two.
We're only going for a day.
Yeah, but, I've heard about these raves, Trev.
Go for a day thinking, "Yeah," you end up at another party, another party, another party.
Some people end up in Ibiza and everything, mate.
Yeah, all right, Gary.
You haven't listened, have you, mate?
Yeah, I have.
There's still a load of sh*t here. There's still a massive pile of sh*t.
Mate, that's like half of what you said I couldn't take.
It doesn't matter. There's still too much there, brother. Way too much.
It's all essential.
I can't believe what I'm looking at.
This is what Trev's got.
That's it.
That's what you've got.
You're a bloke.
We need it!
What do we need here?
That bag is your sleeping bag, mate.
Let's get what we need.
Let's get your...
Sleeping bag, yeah.
We need that.
Necessity.
We need a tent to sleep in, don't we?
Necessity.
But, in terms of, like, pig chow, sweets...
Mate, we need them, mate, for the road.
Harvey, don't be a d*ck!
f*ck off, mate.
That's my sweets, mate! One bag of sweets, made!
Large G&T, please.
No problem.
There you are, love.
Thanks.
Thank you.
There you are.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Cheers.
Right, that's me done.
All right, cheers.
What's up?
What?
So what am I going to do about Kelly?
Don't be too hard on her, Lol.
She has to do from nine to one, Mum, yeah? Who can't do them hours?
She's just struggling a bit at the minute.
Struggling with what? What?
Look, she's going away this weekend.
One final blow out with Gadge and Harvey and that.
Oh, God.
I'll sit her down on Sunday, have a proper good word with her. I promise.
She'll be here on time every f*cking day next week with bells on.
Yeah?
Yeah, fine.
You still on for the barbecue later?
Yeah, definitely.
Want me to bring owt?
No. You're good.
See you later.
Nice one. Thanks, Mum.
See ya.
Mate, just give her five minutes. We'll find her.
We can't go without her, can we, Harv? You're being a nob.
We can, boss. That's the thing. We can.
Are you taking the piss?
Come on.
I had my mix in here. Where is it?
She's just forgot that we told her hers.
She's probably stood outside Shaun's.
No, she's there.
Oh, there she is, Harv.
( Horn beeps )
3:30 at your mum's, Kel.
What?
3:30 at your mum's. Nice one. Where the f*ck were you?
At the pub.
Wicked. Nice one.
Are you getting in?
Weren't it 4:30 at Shaun's?
No. It was 3:30 at your mum's.
Get in, then.
Erm...
Swing by mine and I'll get ready.
Absolutely not, no.
I'll have a shower.
I'll literally be two seconds and I'll come straight out.
Not happening. Get in the car or don't get in the car.
My outfit's on the bed.
We've been driving round for an hour.
Get in the car or f*ck off.
Just get in.
You're not coming.
Come on.
You're taking the piss?
Absolutely not. Can we go?
I'll be one second. I'll go in, I'll have a quick...
Listen, you great frigging twat, get in the car now.
I've been driving round for a f*cking hour. Get in the car.
Kel, just get in the car. Come on.
Get in the f*cking car.
So I'm going to go like this?
Yeah.
I'm not f*cking arguing with you. I'm going. Bye, bye, bye.
Hold on, then. Stop being such a prick.
Thank you.
Budge up, you fat...
Budge up, then, you f*cking ginge minge.
I'm the only one that's not said owt.
( Car revs )
Hold on! I'm not even in the car!
Have you got a drink?
Right.
Who likes salmonella?
Yeah!
Who likes violent illness?
Yeah!
Who likes throwing up?
Doo-dee-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo!
Yeah, that's cool. Doing well, there.
How far can you slide down?
Whoo!
Oh, you big boy. Have you brought them out?
How are you, sweetheart?
I'm all right.
Give us a kiss.
You've got ketchup on your...
Don't be like that.
Get out of it!
Don't embarrass me!
Get off!
Don't embarrass me!
Oh, careful.
What are you doing?
Tried to kiss me.
You've got tomato sauce all in your...
Yeah, he just kissed me, as well.
Is it bad? How bad is it out of ten?
( Bottles clink )
Oh! Oh! Oh!
You've ruined the day!
Music: One Love by The Stone Roses Take a peek on these sweeties.
Oh, amazing.
Double barrels.
Just like a shotgun.
We'll go full. Me and you, we'll go full, Gadget.
Mate, mate, one at least.
Girls, you go halves on one.
Nah, I reckon I could drop one of them.
Shaun the prawn, you have a 16th.
Yeah?
Give it a nibble, see what you think.
Serious.
I know what you're trying to do.
Mate, honestly, it's like nothing else you've ever had.
It's not like this sh*t. It just makes you...
Makes you want to hug the world, basically.
This is what you feel like.
This is it.
All of the time. All the time.
Just love, man. Just love. Gay, straight, love.
You just want to love.
You want to mix with other people in love.
Now, then, is everyone full off impetigo burgers?
Yeah, bloody hell.
I feel sick but...
It's just as well.
You'll notice I didn't eat much during that whole affair.
Yeah, because you didn't want to get ill.
I didn't want to get ill.
That's correct.
But we will.
There's a reason for not wanting to get ill because we're going to find out who the hardest man or woman is via the medium of arm wrestling.
This is going to end in disaster.
I want to watch this.
Right, ready when you are.
I'll lay the table. Come on, Nicky. Come on.
Keep hold of the table. I'm on it.
Come on, Nicky! Come on!
I love his face!
Come on, Woody!
You have to touch the table.
Don't put your head on it.
Honestly, she's really hard.
Come on.
Oh, no.
Yes!
Yes.
Straights against lesbians, get on that.
Is that your w*nk*ng hand?
It is, yeah.
It's really strong.
Pathetic.
( Bottles clink )
Oh!
Ah!
Do it! Do it! Do it!
Go on, give your mum a hand.
Oh, sh*t. He's really strong.
Push it that way.
No. No. No.
( Cheering )
I'm not playing!
Erm, I don't want to be funny or anything but are you sure we're going the right way, because it seems a bit familiar, Gadge?
Yeah, no, no, we're on the right track.
That dry wall looks a bit familiar, Gadge.
We definitely have been down there, mate.
Yeah, yeah.
Please do, yeah.
A to Z.
You couldn't have got a pocket one?
Look out, fatty boom boom.
I couldn't get a pocket one, no. I'm sorry.
Are you serious?
What? I need to read it.
I need to match the map with the road.
I know, mate, but you don't have to put it up on the f*cking windscreen.
You're a f*cking liability, mate.
Do you even know how to read a map, Gadge?
Listen, I know how to read a map, mate, right?
That's all you need to know.
f*cking read it, then.
I'm reading it. Right.
What? Right here?
No, no, no, no, hold on.
We're this green line here.
And, when we get down to this little yellow line, we go left, right?
Right, you ready, Milk?
Er, yeah.
Don't lick it.
I've got to lick it. I've got to lick it to stick it on.
Wet it with your finger.
Just going to get that perfectly between them eyebrows.
Get it right there.
That's the mother. Right there.
Right, ask us some questions.
It's so you.
Am I male?
Yes, you are.
Erm, am I... Am I famous?
No.
Well, I don't know.
In the area, amongst certain females, probably famous.
Am I fat?
From what I've seen...
Yeah? - .. pale and tired.
Am I a penis?
You are a penis.
But it's in a certain place.
So close.
Quite close to where it is now.
You lot are dickheads.
( Cheering )
Dickhead!
Am I female?
Yes.
Oh, she's a powerful woman.
Well, she's...
Am I famous?
Yes, but for all the wrong reasons.
Do you know who she is?
No.
Maybe not ask the kids.
Oh, OK.
Am I Margaret Thatcher?
No.
No, boo!
Boo!
Thank f*ck for that.
You're worse than Thatcher.
Worse than Thatcher? sh*t the bed.
Give us a go on that.
Am I old, then?
No. No.
Not old.
I'll give you a clue.
I call you it all the time.
Oh, Myra Hindley.
( Cheering )
sh*t the bed. f*ck you.
Gadge, we've f*cking been past this.
We're not!
I'm telling you now, we've been past that f*cking sign about four times.
There's a place here called Cock End and...
You're a cock-end.
Mate, if we've been past Cock End, I'd know about it.
That mile sign. We've passed it, Gary.
We've not.
Yes, we f*cking have, mate.
That milestone?
That mile sign.
That mile thing. That milestone. Past it.
It's the third time passing it, boss.
You've not been watching the f*cking road.
I swear to God, mate!
I can't watch the road and read the map.
I ask you for one thing and you don't do f*ck all right, do you?
You watch the road and I...
I am watching the road.
You've been doing owt.
We have to work as a team.
Look, the f*cking map's got holes in it.
Good map, then.
It was the best we could do.
Well done, Gary.
I swear to God, mate, you're ruining our f*cking lives at the moment.
You have no f*cking idea, do you?
You have no idea.
As you can see, I have brought out my ghetto blaster.
It is not the most technical of devices but I have maxed up the volume there. It's on maximum.
I'm about to take you to another galaxy and we're going to party like it's 1999.
Whoo.
Right?
What's this?
Erect yourselves.
( Music plays )
Oh. Dancing. Do you want to dance, Milo? You want to dance?
Oh, man.
Eh, you having that?
( Woody grunts rhythmically )
Mate, there's too many lines.
Shut up, Gary. I'm driving here.
There's red, there's blue, there's green.
I swear to f*cking...
Oi! What's this?
( They all fuss )
Twat!
Oh, my God. Leave him. Leave him. Stop it.
Now look what you've done, you f*cking stresshead, mate!
You've got my arm.
Children!
Like f*cking children.
Now the map's gone.
f*cking hell, lads.
We don't know where the f*ck we are anyway, Gary.
That went too far.
Have a f*g if you want a f*g.
Cheers, mate.
Music: Fantastic Man by William Onyeabor Whoa. Careful. Be careful.
Taking turns. Taking turns.
Doing a little routine.
♪ Since I came to know you, baby, yeah ♪
♪ I've been telling you how sweet you are ♪
♪ I've been telling you how good you are ♪
♪ Now you want to try and tell me how I look... ♪
Oh. Yay!
Yay!
♪ You look so good ♪
♪ Fantastic man I'm drunk, Woods. ♪
I know you are. Don't be scared.
Can you forgive me, Gary, for what I just did a minute ago?
Yeah, I suppose so, just sometimes just watch, do you know what I mean?
Because now the map's gone, innit?
I know.
I'm dead sorry for getting physical and verbally aggressive.
I am very sorry for it.
Here you are. Hang on.
There's summat smoking over there. I think someone's broke down.
What?
Look. That's bad.
Hang on.
They might be ravers, though.
Could be. Could be.
Might know where it is.
Oh, what a stroke of luck!
f*ck's sake.
Drive round.
Help us.
Just drive past.
Stop.
Oh, holy Jesus.
Higgy, I know these people.
Get out the car.
Harvey.
How you doing?
Oh, it's amazing to see you, my friend.
How are you?
Better than your car.
Gary. Hello.
Hello, Kelly.
Gadge.
You all right, mate?
Is that boob juice you've got all over your top there?
Kelly, bless you, my child.
Oh, for f*ck's sake. What are you doing here?
I'm with my mates.
If I had some metal now...
Little bastard.
You broke down, have you, Flip?
Well, you... Kind of.
Well, it's more like just cooling down a bit.
It's heating up, mate, that. It's bad.
Well, it's a purring dragon.
Sometimes he just needs to land, fold his wings and just calm down a bit.
So, where you going, Harv?
Where you going, Flip?
Ah, to the rave up.
Ah.
Nice, yeah.
Yeah, Higgy loves a rave, don't you, Higgy?
Guilty.
Yeah.
He was nearly in tears till we saw you, yeah.
Where is it?
Nearly let him down. Same place you're going.
Where is it, though?
Yeah, we'd have met there, wouldn't we?
You tell us where and we'll come back, bring rescue.
It's local, innit?
But where?
Oh, right. Do you not...
Do you not know where you're going?
Yeah. Just it's...
No, we don't, Flip. No, we ain't got a clue, boss.
Oh, right.
Are you going to tell us?
If I tell you where the rave is, you're going to deny us a lift in that spastic wagon.
Mate, we'll get someone from the rave.
Listen, listen, come on.
There's no room.
We ain't not going to that rave.
You shut up.
We ain't not going.
Just look at the ground. Look at the ground.
I'm in the front, mate. They can f*ck off if they think...
One of yous is in the boot.
Ginge.
No, f*ck off, mate.
I'm already in the back.
Shaun, you're smaller than me.
You get in the boot, Shaun. Come on, Shaun.
No, mate.
Harvey, make Shaun get in the boot.
Carry on and you'll have no f*cking lift.
Let me know when you get there, yeah?
Sarcasm.
Oh, my God.
Move up, that's right.
Ow.
You feel that in your side, Kelly?
Everybody in?
It's man log.
You didn't know where it was, did you, Flip?
I thought I did, and...
It wasn't a wind up, honest, Harv, and...
I wanted to take you to your rave and...
I feel like I've let you all down.
We didn't know were it was anyway, boss, don't worry about it.
That's very kind of you all, thanks.
Shall we piss off then?
Ugh!
Mate!
What else we going to do?
There's no point in going home to do nothing.
We've got beer and that.
Stay in the f*cking woods?
Yeah, build a little fire out of drift wood, we'll be f...
There's no point driving all the way back home to do f*ck all, is there?
Come on!
We've got our pills.
Do you all really fancy it?
Yeah!
Why not? Whack some music on and that.
f*ck it, we'll stay here then. If you want, mate, I'll take you back to your car and you can piss off and all.
Well... I don't mind hanging with you guys... and your party in the woods.
Please don't take me back there, Harvey.
It's like American Werewolf in Yorkshire out there.
Truth is, mate, we ain't got enough pills for you.
Oh, we... we've bought pills to the table, Harvey! Yeah!
Pack of 30.
Pack of 30 what?
Pro Plus.
Different thing, we've got a completely different thing.
Three or four of them and you're up all night.
Voice from boot of the car: Don't make us leave!
( They laugh )
sh*t!
How long's he been in there?!
f*ck knows, man.
f*cking ages!
Swore he was right here!
( Cheering and laughing )
f*cking hell, mate!
Hig!
All right, dude?
Here he is!
I'm fine, me brother used to lock me in the cupboard, sometimes for hours on end and that, so I'm quite good in small spaces.
Fair play to you.
Happy times.
Let us stay, mate?
I promise I'll behave myself. I'll keep these bad boys to myself.
f*ck it, I feel really sorry for you boys, but it ain't just up to me.
That's the thing, like.
You reckon?
Come on, guys.
Can't leave them on their own. We can get a few in car.
Go on, then. Fine!
Let's get very happy, though.
You're in.
Brilliant.
Aww. That's really great of you.
Enjoy yourself.
Have half of this, though. If it's your first time, I'd have half.
Lads, I'm pretty big, and I feel I can handle a full one.
Honestly, mate, I'm telling you the truth.
Just hang on, have half first.
OK, I trust you, hombre. I trust you guys.
Thanks.
Gadgy.
Cheers.
OK, Wow.
Shaun, just have half with me to start off with.
I'll have less than half, mate.
Yeah, he needs less that half.
f*ck off!
To the night, guys.
To the night!
( Indistinguishable chatter )
Guys, here we go.
To the night in the woods.
To a night in the woods!
OK.
Can I have a bit of that drink, Trev?
Before you, Ginge. Jesus.
Have you just done yours with out a drink?
Oh, no, you still have it.
It taste like f*cking shite.
Yeah, I'm not feeling anything, Harvey. I can handle a full one.
I promise you, give it time, mate.
I'd say, half an hour at least, and you'll be off your head.
Brilliant.
Shall I put some music on, then?
Yeah.
The Ginger Ginge!
Shall I put some Roses on?
Yeah.
Where about's are they, Harv?
Down in floor, they were down near my foot.
Can't find it.
Oh, hang on, mate.
Is it the one with the red cover on?
Hang on, hang on. Shh, shh, shh. Wait, listen. Can you hear that?
( Distant music )
It's, like, drumming or something.
I can hear that, Trev.
We've found it, haven't it?
f*ck!
( Distant music and chatter )
( She gasps )
Ladies and gentlemen....
f*cking hell, boys and girls.
We're f*cking here!
f*ck YES!
( They shout, laugh and cheer )
Beautiful, man!
I told you I'd take you there!
I told you!
( Shouting and laughing )
( Drum music becomes louder )
( Chatter, shouting and laughter )
Flip: Let's do this!
( Laughter )
What the f*ck?!
That's not it, is it?
There's nowhere near 2,000 there, mate.
Is that a wigwam?
Trev: This definitely isn't it.
Looks like a f*cking seance!
Well, a party's, a party, isn't it?
Yeah, but, we can't all go in there like this, we'll stand out like a sore thumb!
Has she got her tits out?
What?
Loads of tits out, mate.
Yeah, some are nice.
Some are not so nice and long.
Jesus. Free tits, Harv!
Do you reckon we have it or what?
f*ck it, I'll suck anything!
( Laughter )
Come on, then!
Party!
( Shouting and laughter )
( Drum music )
( Laughter and chatter )
She's pissed!
f*cking hell!
Groovy shirt, man! Yeah!
Can I touch your stuff?
She's got her tits out!
Please let me touch you tits.
This bit. Just this bit.
Don't touch her, Gadge, she'll chop your hand off! Chop your hand off.
I want to touch it...
(LAUGHING)
'Do you really want to jump? Do you want to?
'Well, that's fine with me. Come on. Let's do it, assh*le.
'Wait a minute! Wha...
I want to do it.
Wait... What do you mean?!
'Oh!'
( Characters scream all the way down )
( Telephone rings )
(Get it.) - No way. - (Go on.)
( Telephone rings )
I'm just too tired, I am, Lol.
Get the phone, Woody.
No, it's me mum and dad.
Yeah, of course it's your mum and dad.
No, I've had enough of them now.
( Telephone rings )
Woody, get the phone. I'm not talking to your mum for an hour.
( Telephone rings )
( She sighs )
Hello?
Yeah...
Right, let me just nip upstairs and I'll take the phone up there.
All right, just one sec.
Right, Woody, it's me mum.
Mm.
When I shout, put the phone down. Are you listening?
Mm-hm.
Yeah?
Yeah?
Yes.
Right, put it down then, Wood.
Woody!
( They grumble )
Quick.
I'm doing it!
It's down.
Hi, you all right?
No. Milky's here, so I couldn't talk.
Come on, then, what's up?
You sound really stressed.
Tell me what's up, Combo.
( Brooding, bass heavy rock music )
( Laughter, chatter and shouting )
♪ You could take my time ♪
♪ And make it matter ♪
♪ Make it matter ♪
♪ To me ♪
♪ You could turn my head ♪
♪ You could turn my thought... ♪
Are you having a nice time?
I like this.
♪ Make it matter ♪
♪ You make it matter... ♪
This is great. This is great.
I love ecstasy!
( Shaun laughs )
♪ I'll never... ♪
♪ Feel this young... ♪
Is it too soon to say that I think I might love you?
♪ You can take my time ♪
♪ And make it matter ♪
♪ You can take my time ♪
♪ And make it real ♪
♪ You can... ♪
♪ Come on, I need... ♪
♪ Oh, you know you need me ♪
♪ Oh, no, I know you need me ♪
♪ I'll never... ♪
That's amazing.
♪ Feel this young ♪
♪ I'll never ♪
♪ Feel this young ♪
♪ I'm feeling older ♪
♪ I'm feeling older ♪
♪ I'm feeling older ♪
♪ I'm feeling older ♪
♪ I'm feeling older ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, older, older ♪
♪ I'm getting older ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, older, old... ♪
Hello!
Hiya.
How are you?
I'm good, thanks. How are you?
I'm very good.
Do you want to come in?
I'd... I'd love to, and to be invited, it's special.
Come in!
Oh, yeah.
It's gone a bit mental out there, hasn't it?
Yeah.
Mmm. It's good, though!
Yeah, it is.
It's very ni... It's nice out there, isn't it?
Yeah.
Just everyone....
Just happy, like.
Yeah, just doing what they need to do.
Yeah.
You coming in for a bit of quiet?
Well... Well...
I won't lie to you, I was... I was going past for a piss.
Yeah.
I was going past for a wee. Excuse me.
Gadg! Give us a beer, my friend.
For, you mate.
Do you know what? I love you.
This is f*cking nice, this.
I know. I know, it's wonderful.
You all right?
( Shaun and woman laugh )
Love you, mate!
Yeah, it's... It's special here, like, it's so different you know, to anything else.
Yeah.
Man on television: 'If you would kindly tell me everything you know, I promise I'll k*ll you quick.'
Second man on TV: 'I've told you everything I know.'
(Wood?)
(Woody?)
Woody?
Ungh!
( She sighs in annoyance )
So, like, I know it's rude to ask, and I shouldn't, but can I ask how old are you are?
I'm 47.
47?
Mm.
Wow. You're literally, like, five years older than my dad.
( She laughs )
I know... I didn't' mean any offence, like...
I don't take any offence!
No, no offence.
Yeah.
But...
Like...
Do you get on with your dad?
I di... I di... Yeah.
Course, yeah. I f*cking love him to bits.
But he's not here anymore, he passed away.
Aww, I'm sorry to hear that.
It happens, like, it happens. My dad was... He was a fighter in the w*r and he bought me up a fighter.
You know, like, he was one of them that...
Like, I know he can see me now, like he's looking from above and he's looking at me and you.
He's thinking, "f*cking go on, boy," that's what he's thinking.
And he was a fighter, and that's what I've always had in me, and he was a brave man.
Yeah.
Like, he fought for the country, he fought in the Falklands and...
He was just a brave man, and that's what he brought me up to be, and if he'd have been looking down on me now, if I was sat here, laying down there crying, he'd look at me and he'd go, "Shaun, f*cking hell. Sort it out. What you doing what you crying for? Crying's not going to bring me back." It doesn't, you know?
But if he'd have seen me down here, you know, having the time of me life and sat here having fun...
( Shaun chuckles )
He'd be, like I say, he'd be sat there going, "f*cking, Shaun, love you to bits, mate."
Yeah. So he's with you all the time.
All the time, all the time. But...
And how old where you when he passed?
I would have been 11, 12.
Oh, right!
Young.
Yeah.
I was young, and er, like...
I understand death at that age, obviously, but...
Yeah.
It's just one of them things, isn't it?
There's nothing you can do about it.
No.
But you miss him?
Yeah, obviously.
Yeah.
( Shaun cries softly )
( He inhales deeply )
( Acoustic guitar melody )
Distorted female voice: There you are.
Are you OK?
Are you all right?
Are you OK?
( Brooding, bass heavy rock music )
♪ Everybody speaks ♪
♪ But nobody hears ♪
♪ Everybody speaks ♪
♪ Nobody hears ♪
♪ They waste days ♪
♪ They waste years ♪
♪ I'm the first ♪
♪ I'm the last ♪
♪ I'm the future ♪
♪ I'm the past ♪
♪ Let the prime numbers rise ♪
♪ Let the prime numbers rise ♪
♪ This is God's song ♪
♪ Somebody listen ♪
♪ Do you speak my language? ♪
♪ Has the spirit risen? ♪
♪ I will protect you ♪
♪ I will guide ♪
♪ I will bless when you take my side ♪
♪ This is God's song ♪
♪ Let demons fly ♪
♪ It's you, you, you, you, you ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
♪ And obviously I ♪
♪ And obviously I ♪
♪ And obviously I ♪
♪ And obviously I ♪
♪ This is God's song... ♪
♪ This is the country ♪
♪ This is the drug ♪
♪ This is pain... ♪
♪ Of the beginning... ♪
♪ This is a god's song ♪
♪ I let you go ♪
♪ Slip away, slip away, slip away ♪
♪ This is God's song... ♪
♪ This is the country ♪
♪ This is the drop ♪
♪ This is pain... ♪
♪ Of the beginning... ♪
♪ This is a god's song ♪
♪ I let you go ♪
♪ Slip away, slip away, slip away ♪
♪ The click of my fingers ♪
♪ Goes well with thunder ♪
♪ I think you don't know ♪
♪ The curse you're under ♪
♪ Kingdom come... ♪
♪ I'm the heavens ♪
♪ I'm the sun ♪
♪ This is a god's song ♪
♪ You'll be obtained ♪
♪ You'll be reared ♪
♪ This is a god's song ♪
♪ Let demons fly ♪
♪ It's you, you, you, you you! ♪
♪ But obviously I ♪
♪ And obviously I ♪
♪ And obviously I ♪
♪ And obviously I ♪
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming ♪
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming ♪
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming ♪
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming ♪
♪ And obviously I. ♪
Voice of Kel's father: I love you so much. You know that?
♪ This is a god's song... ♪
(ECHOING) I love you so much. So much.
I love you so much.
You know that? I love you so much. You know that?
I love you so much.
( Men grunt )
Kelly's voice: Dad?
Dad...
♪ Ooooh, oooooh, oooooh ♪
♪ Oooooh, oooooh ♪
♪ Ooooh... ♪
♪ Ooooh, oooooh, oooooh ♪
♪ Ooooh, oooooh ♪
♪ Oooooh... ♪
♪ Oooooh ♪
♪ Here it comes. ♪
( She shivers )
( Bedroom door opens )
(Morning.)
Where have you been?
(f*cking down there on couch with him.)
Why?
Because you didn't wake me up, you bastard!
( He groans )
f*cking hell!
Is he still down there?
Of course he's still there.
He's like a turd that won't flush.
That's all the food gone, then.
I've hid it.
Where?
In the tumble drier.
Ew! Won't want to eat that now.
It's the only place he won't think to look.
He will. He'll sniff it out.
Is your mum all right?
Yeah, why?
She rang last night. I thought maybe...
Maybe Nikki had got her dildo stuck all the way up inside her.
No.
Was trying to spoon it out.
Oh, Woody, don't! Don't! You're disgusting.
I'm sorry.
No, it weren't my mum on the phone. It was Combo.
Oh, f*cking hell.
Is he all right?
No, not really.
Is he not?
No.
He was a bit... bit teary, to be honest.
Teary?
Yeah.
Was he?
Well, he's... he's trying to get out, isn't he?
Mm.
Yeah.
Only it didn't go very well last time and, well, he was telling me about all this stuff that he's got to get together and, you know, what they expect of him if he gets parole....
Go on, I can feel something.
Yeah.
Come on, then.
Well, he needs stability, he needs people for when he's out cos he hasn't got anyone, so he's obviously got...
Drop the b*mb. Let's have the b*mb.
He needs somewhere to live.
There it is. There it is.
Well, we got a year of happiness.
( They laugh )
Didn't we? f*cking hell.
Well, I've said... I've not said, like, defo yes...
I've said I'd talk to you about it.
Of course.
Of course he's going to have to stay here.
What do you mean?
He's going to have to stay here, of course he is. Lollipop...
You wouldn't mind Combo moving in?
No.
It's going to be messy, but I think... Well...
I wouldn't have a son, would I? I wouldn't have Jimmy... I wouldn't have the love of my life... without what that man did, so of course he's going to have to stay here.
Do you know what? He might not even get out.
They might not even accept it, so it might not even be a problem.
But if there's more of a chance...
If it's going to improve his chances of getting out, then of course he's going to have to stay here.
Oh, God. It's going to be...
Mm. Terrible.
.. a f*cking nightmare, Woody.
Yeah, all right, but it's not... We've been through worse, haven't we?
Let's not...
They're going to hate me.
No!
They're going to just hate me again.
No, no, no! I don't think so.
Oh, God! It makes me feel sick, Wood.
Really makes me feel genuinely like...
That's not cool.
Have a little time on me... on me chest-aroo.
Oh, that's better.
Oh, Christ, I love you. It's ridiculous, do you know that?
Thanks, Wood. You're the best.
( Birds chirping )
( He sighs )
Oh, man!
Oi!
Ah!
( He pants )
The f*ck you doing out here?
Just looking at this.
It's beautiful, isn't it?
Yeah.
Better that what we have back home, isn't it?
If someone, like, from Africa, who'd never been to England, and they had to draw a picture, this is exactly what they'd draw.
A mad one last night, wasn't it?
Mm, crazy.
Yeah, it got a bit crazy.
What happened to you? I didn't see much of you.
Just... around, really.
Cop off?
Little bit, mate, yeah.
The guy with the flaming whip, was it?
( He chuckles )
Yeah.
Was it, er, one of the topless ladies this time?
You wish.
( He chuckles )
You all right?
Mm.
No, you're not.
I am, Gadg.
Are you OK?
Yeah.
No, Kelly, come here, come here.
I'm fine. It's fine.
No, it's not, come here. What's up with you?
Kel, look at me. Look at me.
What's up with you?
I'm all right.
What's up?
I don't want to talk about it, to be honest.
Come on, what's up?
Come here, what's up with you?
Don't cry.
I'm a f*cking slag, Gadget!
What you saying that for?
Cos I am.
Hey, look at me.
(You're not a slag.)
No fucker's hurt you, have they?
If any fucker's hurt you, tell me now.
No.
Are you sure?
Just do what I f*cking want, Gadg, that's the f*cking problem.
Please don't say that, please.
Love you, babe.
f*cking love you. You know that as well, don't you?
I always f*cking have done, haven't I? Eh?
Music: Experience by Ludovico Einaudi