01x03 - The Curious Disappearance of Mr. Donovan

[bunniefuu]

Grinder: There's still one thing that doesn't make sense to me.

The senator's su1c1de.

But the coroner said...

I know damn well what the coroner said.

I broke into the morgue last night.

I re-performed the autopsy myself.

And I found this.

You want to bet that this matches the g*n the FBI found in your apartment?

It's over.

Admit it.

What gave me away?

You... just... did.

That's right. I had nothing on you, Ivy Dexter, but a hunch.

And this b*llet that almost took my life in Macau.

She's all yours, guys.

What?!

Damn you, Grinder!

Damn you!

So, are we gonna have The Grinder just on all the time now?

In 170 countries.

And in none of those countries do they have a problem with characters that just confess for no reason?

I don't think you understood the plot.

Oh.

Yeah, I probably didn't get it.

Yeah.

So, The Grinder had a real dilemma in this one, 'cause he had to lie.

Those scenes really took it out on me.

Oh, did they?

They took a lot out of you? How much did they take out of you?

A lot.

A lot?

These scenes took a lot out of you?

Can't walk in my shoes.

Oh, Dean.

I could see you struggling with it.

Yeah.

Because he values justice, but he also values honesty.

And he only lied to expose the truth.

Which is a good lie.

Exactly.

No!

Not exactly.

It was not a good lie, Ethan.

There's no such thing as good lies.

Can we please not use episodes of The Grinder to teach life lessons to my kids?

I'm sorry. Would you rather him learn it on the streets?

I think there are more than those two options for him, but if you're making me choose now, I would say, uh, the streets.

I would say the streets.

Streets by a mile.

Stew, hope you don't mind. I borrowed your robe.

Oh. No. It's all right, Dad.

Just wish you hadn't taken it while I was still in the shower.

Oh, did you need it?

Yeah. That's... why I hung it there.

Well, just say that, Stew.

Okay, yeah, next time, I'll...

I'll just say it.

Anyway, thanks for letting me crash while they paint my house.

You're always welcome, Dad.

But there is something we need to talk about.

Yeah, whatever you want.

Thank you.

Oh, thanks. Yeah, appreciate that.

Last night, we tried to watch... Ray Donovan.

Okay.

But we couldn't because someone deleted it off the DVR.

It wasn't me.

Wasn't me, either.

I hate to be that guy, but maybe we look to Uncle Dean for this.

Dean: Nice try, big fella.

But after what the DVR did to the traditional ratings model, I don't touch the damn things.

You heard 'em, Ethan. Time to fess up, bud.

Do not let her play you like this.

We're not even upset about Ray Donovan.

We're a little upset about Ray Donovan.

We're a little upset about it, but what we're really upset about is the fact that you guys are lying to us right now.

Two siblings locked in the stalemate of a lifetime, neither one giving an inch.

Thank you, Dean.

Yes.

Always appreciate your narration.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, I'm happy to do it.

You know what it reminds me of?

When your dad broke his bedroom window and tried to blame it on me.

Dad, you did that?

No!

That is not at all what happened.

That's how I remember it.

No.

Your grandfather just believes your uncle because he's a better actor.

I always thought you were a tremendous actor.

You just never gave yourself enough credit.

Great. Thank you, Dean.

Your father's just bitter because he got caught.

And then I had to ground him, and then he missed his prom or whatever.

It was not my prom or whatever.

It was the sophomore overnight field trip.

And you know... You know what?

Doesn't matter.

Let's just forget about it. It was a long time ago, so...

But I will tell you this.

If I did break the window, and I'd been lying about it this whole time, I certainly would be big enough to admit it now.

And how do we know that that isn't a lie?

All right, kids, we are not letting you follow in the footsteps of your uncle, so, until one of you comes clean, you're both grounded.

What? Oh, come on.

That's not's fair. She did it.

Tell him you did it.

Are you kidding me, Ethan?

Two siblings pitted against each other in a battle of consciences.

Who will prevail?

Please stop.

A father... at the end of his rope.

You broke the window.

Okay, uh, last piece of business.

There's been a little setback on the personal injury case.

Rozz/Landy's introduced some new evidence that we need to go...

Sorry. Which case is this?

It's the one where the mom tripped on the broken step in front of the school.

Rozz/Landy's trying to get out of paying our client's medical bills.

They found out she has a preexisting ankle injury.

How? The client told us that in confidence.

We don't know, Todd. Sometimes these things just happen.

Or... do we know?

And these things don't just happen?

What are you thinking, Deano?

Season six, Episode 13, "Fire in the Mole."

"Fire in the Mole."

Ivy Dexter was leaking secrets to the Santino crime family.

Everyone trusted her.

No one saw it coming... except me.

Except your character.

Hmm?

Nobody saw it coming except your character.

You didn't do anything.

You just said the words they wrote down for you.

Dean Sr.: No need to nitpick, Stew.

We all knew what he meant.

This is a family law firm.

Rozz/Landy did not plant a mole to get an edge on a $900 injury case.

Okay, nobody in this room is working for the other side.

Mm-hmm.

I'm sorry. Dean, are you suggesting that it's me?

I'm a mole?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No one's suggesting anything.

But that said, wow!

A little defensive.

Okay, well, I'm gonna go, maybe circle back and look for some witnesses.

Stewart: Thank you, Claire, for presenting an actual solution.

All right, I'm gonna run over to the court.

Everyone else have stuff to do?

Tons of stuff. Very valuable here.

We'll hold down the fort.

Obviously it's Claire, right?

So what are we thinking? Fire her?

Start beefing up my role here?

Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Todd.

You got to remember, one step... at a time.

One step at a time. Yes.

(whispers): Stew?

Stew?

Oh, my God.

Are you sleeping?

Yes, I'm sleeping.

What do you want?

Dean?

Hi, Deb. I need to talk to you. Hallway.

Are you insane? Are you a crazy person?

It's the middle of the night.

Two seconds.

I'm... Oh, my God.

Thanks for coming out in the hall.

Do you not sleep?

This is gonna be very hard for you to hear, because I know how much you hate admitting that you're wrong.

The broken window thing.

You broke the window.

I didn't.

You, Dean, broke the window.

I didn't bring you out in the hallway to argue with you.

I have something very important I want to tell you.

Dean, Claire is not a mole.

Okay, hear me out.

She's a new hire, she worked for the other side, she refuses to sleep with me.

Good night, Dean.

It adds up!

It adds way up.

Todd: That bitch isn't fooling anyone.

Dean and I are onto her.

She's a mole, Murph.

Okay.

Let's see, what else happened at work that I can tell you about?

Oh, another free one.

Thanks, dawg. You always hook me up.

You know, you come by here a lot and you seem to be a pretty decent guy.

I appreciate that.

I got to tell you something.

It hasn't been me buying you these drinks.

It's been them.

Oh!

Hey, Rozz/Landy!

Murph: Those lawyers send over sh*ts to get you drunk, and then they write down what you say about your cases.

What?

Murph: Like the other day, when you were talking about those medical records.

Then, a couple of weeks ago, you were talking about that client that got hit by a car and how that case went against you.

(echoing): And, oh, my goodness, the time you were talking about that divorce settlement.

I mean, they just kept feeding you drinks all night.

Dean, I-I need to tell you something, and it's important.

Well, Todd... you can always tell me anything.

Because we're friends?

I wouldn't get hung up on why.

Claire's clean.

She's not the mole.

What? H-How do you know?

Because it was me!

I was yappin' my big, dumb mouth at the bar, and Rozz and Landy heard everything.

I am the leak.

I am so embarrassed.

Do you know what this means?

Yes, that you hate me and you hate everything about me.

Ugh. No, it's worse.

I was wrong.

We both were wrong.

All right, you need to promise me something.

Anything.

Stewart can never know.

So I think it's time we have a frank, adult conversation.

I just need 20 Can you give me 20?

Turn off the TV.

Isn't that the show that you two just got grounded for erasing?

Yeah, it's on demand.

I don't know what they're so pissed about.

Well, they're pissed about the lying.

Ethan did it.

Oh, my goodness, Lizzie did it.

Ethan, you're being ridiculous right now. It's...

No, I'm not being rid...

You guys are more stubborn than your dad ever was.

Well, maybe it's because he's telling the truth and he didn't break that window?

Well, Dean didn't break it, so who the hell did?

I was so wrong that it made you wrong, too.

Well, it's fine for you to be wrong.

Everybody expects you to be wrong.

Sure.

It is not a good look on me.

It's why The Grinder was never wrong on the show.

Because I could never believably play it.

It's my one flaw as an actor.

Great news. There's been a breakthrough in the case.

Claire: A security camera caught the fall, and I got an X-ray of her ankle that supports our timeline. Open and shut.

Wow! That is great work, Claire.

You've done something for us that directly affects Rozz/Landy in a negative way.

Yes, that was the idea.

Hmm.

Claire: Well, we should head over there and put an end to the whole thing.

Yes.

Todd, could you give us a second?

It was good talking to you.

Anything you'd like to...

Like to what?

Dean. Come on, you can admit it.

You were wrong about Claire.

Or...

There is no "or."

She's playing a deeper game than we thought.

She absolutely is not. Dean, you don't have to double down on this. Just admit it. You were...

Not thorough enough.

I was not thorough enough. Thank you.

That was a great note.

And...

...freeze.

The step was... broken.

Stuberto.

(exhales)

Coming in with a last-minute case closer, Grinder-style.

(chuckles) Look at you, bud.

Proud of you, big dog.

Thank you, Pat. That means so much.

We'll come by with the settlement tomorrow.

Make sure that settlement includes all medical expenses, plus fees.

Ooh, what a team. He's got the video, she comes in with the legalese.

It's really working, huh?

Yeah. Sorry we had to steal her away from you guys.

Well, they didn't exactly steal me. I wanted out.

Desperately. You two are terrible.

I hear you. And we're working on that.

But we were a little chapped when you left, so that's why we took advantage of your boy.

Uh... what do you mean? Who's my boy?

Todd. At the bar.

Not proud of it.

No.

Thinking back, not our finest moment, because, dude, we respect you. We do.

We just don't show it.

No hard feelings, right?

Stewart: Rozz and Landy say hi.

Oh, uh, cool, cool. Uh... Tell 'em I said what's up.

Todd.

I'm sorry, okay? I wanted to let you know, I swear, but Dean wouldn't let me.

Dean knew?

No...

Dean... knew it was you, but he couldn't admit it.

Don't be mad at Dean. This is all my fault. Don't be mad...

Listen to me, listen to me.

You have to promise me something.

Anything.

You can't let Dean know that I know he knows.

I will not let-let Dean know that you know that...

Don't let Dean know that I know he knows.

Got it. I'm not involved in that.

Dean, you... Dean.

Right.

Okay.

Say it back to me.

Don't let Dean knows that you know that I know...

No, no. Dean knows he doesn't know.

You can't let Dean know... that I know he knows.

I promise. I prom...

Are you sure?

'Cause you just let me know that Dean knows.

Oh, I see what you're saying. Oh.

Right? So you have to do the opposite and not let Dean know that I know he knows.

Got it.

You got it?

Got it.

All right, good, good.

I'm not gonna repeat it back to you, but I got it.

I think I would feel better if you just said it once back to me that it was clear.

Okay, I'm gonna be you and repeat it back to you.

No, don't just repeat my words, say it in your own words, so I know that you got the message.

But if I do it as me, then all the...

But you say it in your own...

...pronouns, the pronouns change.

Again, to review, you need to know not to let Dean know that I know.

You see?

Okay.

Wait, why?

Because I'm gonna make The Grinder admit he was wrong.

Thanks so much for your hospitality.

No Dad, stay anytime.

They love having us.

Oh, we really do.

Guys, if I could have your attention.

I have to get something off my chest, and it's been really tearing me up.

I think I may have deleted Ray Donovan.

Oh, Ethan, you did?

Ethan: I don't specifically remember doing it, but...

I think I may have done it by accident.

And if there's one thing I know, Lizzie wouldn't do this to me, lie like this and let me go down for something I didn't do.

Because she's my sister.

Wait.

What's going on?

I did it, okay?

I deleted Ray Donovan by mistake.

Got her!

What? You were faking?

I was acting.

There's a difference. Right, Uncle Dean?

There sure is.

Okay, well, you're both still in trouble for lying.

So just, you know, take it back upstairs and we'll talk about this later.

(scoffs) I don't believe this.

Ethan, you better watch your back.

Wait, what-what just happened?

That was quite a piece of acting.

Yeah.

Thanks. When I was deep in it, I actually believed I was guilty.

Yeah, I saw flashes of that.

But I also saw some false moments.

Okay, I'll work on that.

Well, you'll have a lot of time in your room.

Let's go. Come on.

Stewart: I'm very alarmed that Ethan can make himself cry so believably.

Oh, I know. That's new.

But it worked. Got Lizzie to confess.

God, I wish I would've thought of that back in high school.

You know, missing that sophomore field trip extended my virginity another 18 months.

Oh, yeah? You've done that math a couple times?

Uh-huh.

So Ethan actually guilted Lizzie into confessing.

Oh, no.

I see where this is going, and I think you should stop.

I can break him. I got it.

You think so?

Yeah. Look at Ethan. Ethan got results.

Okay. Yeah.

I can't cry like him, but...

I can break him Deb.

I got it!

Good luck.

(sighs)

What are you doing in here?

Oh, hi.

I'm just really distraught.

And sad.

What's going on?

I fired Claire tonight.

Really?

Yeah.

She did not take it well.

Probably the... hardest thing I've ever had to do.

I'm sorry to hear that.

Um, you did the right thing.

I had to do it.

You were so sure about her.

(sighs)

You couldn't be wrong.

Right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Probably also gonna... have to report her to the bar.

Oh. Have to.

That means she won't be able to practice law anymore.

Her career will be... ruined.

A fitting end.

Just want to make sure you're okay with that.

(inhales deeply)

Yeah.

I'm gonna go and sleep.

Like a baby.

Oh, come on!

You talked to Todd.

Well, what exactly are you asking me, Stewart?

Are you asking if Todd told me that you know that I know?

I knew that guy couldn't keep his mouth shut.

Aw, brother, Todd didn't tell me anything.

You... just... did.

Hey.

Could I ask you something?

Yeah. Sure.

Sorry, I was sleeping.

Why did you confess earlier?

I don't know. I felt bad Ethan was getting punished.

Yeah, but they didn't have anything on you.

I mean, y-you could've taken that to your grave.

You could've just lied to yourself until you believed it.

I hear that... works for people.

But then I would've been totally trapped.

Like you with the window.

Like your dad with the window.

Remember, he's the liar there.

Right. Sorry.

Rozz: So our client will pay medical bills and attorney fees.

And in return, you agree that no one is at fault.

Claire: We can agree to that.

Uh, sorry, hold on.

Someone was at fault.

And when someone is at fault... they should be held responsible.

Stewart, that's not what we discussed.

This world is filled with people like your client, who think they don't have to take responsibility for what they do.

When someone's wrong, they should admit that they're wrong.

I'm a tad confused.

Yeah.

Shouldn't Grinder do the big speeches?

Don't mind if I do.

I have an announcement to make, and it's gonna shock a lot of people.

Stewart isn't talking about the case.

He's talking about me.

And the fact that I've been living a lie for most of my life.

The truth is, I... broke the window.

Oh, my God. He admitted it.

After all these years.

I'm sorry I lied. I'm sorry that you had to miss that field trip. You definitely didn't deserve to have your virginity dragged out like that.

Ah, we don't have to talk about... I'm fine now.

But mostly, I'm sorry... that it took so long for me to say I'm sorry.

It's okay, Dean.

Nice to hear you say it now.

(chuckles softly)

Okay.

I'm sorry, too, Stew.

I should've believed you.

(chuckles)

Feels kind of weird being here for this.

Yeah. We're done here, right?

Uh, yes.

We are, uh... we're done.

No, we're not.

There's one more confession you need to hear.

It's also gonna shock a lot of people probably.

I... was the mole.

Todd, literally every person in this room knows that.

Yeah, you told me to my face.

I think I got it in an e-mail.

We made you the mole.

You were our mole.

You knew?

I did. I did know, Todd.

Okay, never mind.

Next time, I'll think of something.

I'm sorry that I just wasted everybody's time.

Tired of fixing things for people who don't deserve it.

All right. Wait. Hold on.

So-so Ray was telling the truth the whole time?

(groans)

I'm sorry.

I'm completely lost.

Lizzie, this is what happens when you miss an episode.

Okay, I already said I was sorry.

I'm not gonna feel bad about it anymore.

I know exactly how you feel.

Yes, you do, son, and I'm proud of you.

Yes, Dean, we're all very proud of you for admitting something you did 20 years ago.

You're really not mad at Dean for lying to you?

Eh, he did what he had to do to get out of trouble.

Can't fault him for that.

I would argue that you can fault him.

Yeah, you can fault him for that. Yeah.

He's your son. He lied to you for 20 years.

You faulted me for the same thing for, like... Yeah.

Water under the bridge, Stew.

You can't say it's water under the bridge.

I say it's water under the bridge. I'm the wronged party.

"Water under the bridge." Glad you're okay with it.

I haven't felt this good in years.

This whole clean conscience thing, I-I could... I could get used to it.

Well, Dean, I mean, your conscience is still-still a little dirty.

What do you mean?

Well, your uncle was wrong about the whole Claire-mole nonsense.

We were both wrong.

What was Dad wrong about?

Your dad said that there was no mole when, in fact, there was one.

Oh, right. Okay.

There was no mole.

Wasn't Todd the mole?

(scoffs) I mean, yes, I guess...

Yeah, Todd was... a-a kind of a mole.

And that makes you...

I was wrong.

And I was wrong about the mole's name.

So... I guess it's kind of a tie.

Is that what you need to tell yourself to move on from this?

Yes. Yes, it is.

Would you un-pause that?

Sure.

Ray Donovan: It's got to change.

Who's that?

All: Ray Donovan!