02x02 - To Die or Not to Die

[bunniefuu]

Man: The heavens shall bruit again. Respeaking earthly thunder. Come away.

Oh, that this too, too sullied flesh would melt.

Thanks for coming to see Jared.

He's very good.

He is. Although Shakespeare's never been my thing.

Mm-hm.

Though that thee everlast.

I'm never quite sure what's going on.

Shh, Mike. This is the good bit.

To a nunnery, go.

Jared's always had a way with the ladies.

Farewell.

Oh, yeah, being sent to a nunnery gets us every time.

Oh, heavenly powers restore him.

Help, angels, make assay, with strings of steel.

A hit, a very palpable hit.

The drink! The drink!

I am poisoned.

It is here, Hamlet. Hamlet, thou art slain.

Flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.

I think that's what you call milking it.

Perhaps he got a bad review.

Is there a doctor in the house?

What is it?

Get away.

Get him his thing! Ruth!

OK.

An ambulance! We need an ambulance, please!

Excuse me.

Oh, goodness.

Oh, Christ. He's dead.

(SCREAMS)

So much for breaking a leg, fella. Looks like you went a little too far. What do you know about this?

It isn't real. It's a stage wound. Blood balloon, containing fake blood. See?

It's very realistic.

Yeah. The props guy's really good.

Can someone please tell us what has happened?

And you are?

Sorry, Senior, this is Ralph.

'Rafe'.

It says here Ralph. Ralph St John.

'Sinjin'.

Ralph is the director of the play.

He was such a lovely boy.

Ralph, darling man. Jared.

Ralph.

Paula, Paula Worthington.

DSS Mike Shepherd.

Is there anything I can do to help?

Uh, no, I think we've got everything under control, thank you.

Benny, I loved him like a son.

Sorry, if you don't mind.

Apologies. I'm all over the place. Any idea how or...

There'll be a post-mortem.

Of course. Wasn't he a wonderful Hamlet?

Uh, yes, he was.

If it's not too much trouble, I wonder if I can be interviewed as quickly as possible. I need to get home to my twins, Viola and Sebastian.

Your children are home alone?

They'll be wondering where I am.

Shouldn't be too much longer. Breen, could you take Mrs Worthington's details?

Ms.

Ms Worthington's.

Thank you.

Come with me.

♪ Green turns to blue Fading afternoon... ♪

What's going on up there?

One of the cast got a bit hysterical, needed to be sedated. Doctor says it has all the hallmarks of an asthma att*ck. Ben was known to be asthmatic.

Can you smell that?

What?

You can't smell anything?

No. What? (SNIFFS) Oh. Is this where you tell me it smells like bitter almonds?

Mm.

Tim, that's so unfair.

It's no big deal.

Not everyone can detect that smell.

I know.

It's a genetic thing. I know. It was my big fail at police college.

It was the only fail, I'm sure.

Yeah, there is that.

Well, it's definitely there.

So...something is rotten in the state of Brokenwood. Were you awake for any of the show?

Let's get him to the mortuary, arrange a post-mortem. Probably more fun than Shakespeare.

We are dealing with something very unusual.

As well as pantaloons, tights and fake blood. What's this?

Chafing from the ruff he had around his neck.

But it's different from this.

That's where it gets interesting.

What was the performance?

'Hamlet'.

The Russian play.

Hamlet was from Russia?

No, but he's very Russian.

He worries too much, complains about everything.

Takes too long to make up his mind and when he finally does, it all ends badly anyway. Such is life.

Are we talking asthma?

Sudden respiratory failure, yes, but this pinkish discolouration around the mouth tells me it wasn't asthma.

With asthma, typically it is very pale, even bluish.

Gina, do you smell bitter almonds?

No, I smell musty old sneakers.

Oh!

Don't worry, Mike, in Russia the quality of almonds means they smell very similar to sneakers.

Right.

Toxicology will confirm.

How do you think it was administered?

That's the thing.

Here in this little blood bag there is a sharp device.

When the bag was crushed, the device could have broken the skin, causing the real blood to mix with the fake blood.

Are you saying the fake blood contained the poison?

I think so, yes.

But there is no actual wound on the deceased's arm, so how did he receive the lethal dose?

Well, that would depend on what it was. So, the type of poison was?

Why do you ask me this, Mike?

Because it's your job to tell me.

But I can see you already know.

Mm.

Man: One minute the guy's taking a bow, the next he's lying on the ground, flapping around like a dying fish.

Shakespeare will do that to you.

Cyanide will do that to you.

Cyanide?

Potassium cyanide, most likely. KCN. Tests will confirm.

Oh, wow! Cool.

I mean, not cool for the guy, obviously.

The cyanide, that's pretty... unusual, is all I'm saying.

Do we know how?

No. The blood bag was set to break the skin, but it didn't. Perhaps he inhaled the fumes, but would that be enough to k*ll him? What do we know about this kid?

Ben Faulkner, 21 years old. He was an orphan. He lost his mother to cancer at age seven and his father to a car accident 10 years ago. No siblings. Ever since then, the Brokenwood Theatre Society of which his parents were members have acted like a surrogate family. Most notably, Paula Worthington. He spent a lot of time with her.

And presumably her kids.

She has kids? I don't remember that from her details.

She was very keen to get back to them last night. Twins, Viola and Sebastian.

Right, 'Twelfth Night'.

What?

Viola and Sebastian were the twins in 'Twelfth Night'. Another Shakespeare play. Never mind. Up until several weeks ago, Ben was dating Juliet Phelps, who played Ophelia.

The one who goes crazy?

Oh, you were awake for some of it.

Do we have her witness statement?

No, she's in hospital. Heavily sedated. She's had something of a breakdown.

That's called irony.

Or convenient. Jilted lover takes revenge, then removes herself from suspicion by hiding behind an emotional collapse.

Like it.

I suggest we start with Ruth Phelps, her mother and also the stage manager for the show.

Breen, head down to the hospital. I'm returning to the scene. Kristen, we need to know all the cyanide suppliers and licence holders.

Could I take the cyanide?

What?

I mean, if it made no difference, could I follow up on the cyanide?

Let's get this Ruth Phelps talking while her daughter's indisposed.

Yeah, see, Mrs Phelps was my English teacher at Riverstone High School.

So?

It's just Shakespeare was her specialty and it definitely wasn't mine.

She was intense about it and I'm pretty sure I never handed in my last assignment, which was ironically on 'Hamlet'.

She may still be expecting it.

You'd rather work with cyanide?

It's nowhere near as lethal as Mrs Phelps.

Never picked you as a Shakespeare type.

Oh, me neither. I always really liked the words, you know, a bit like hip-hop without the fat bits, but one day I was just grabbing a coffee...

Ralph St John. Have you ever done any Shakespeare?

So, to be or not to be Hamlet, that became the question.

You were discovered, as they say.

Yeah, I guess.

These are all the props?

Yep.

The blood bag, how did that work?

Ah! Say you're Laertes.

OK.

Thrust at me.

Ha-ha-ha. Oh.

I grab my arm, the little balloon breaks, blood comes out and I hold it out to the audience.

Very good. For a moment I thought I'd hit you there.

Ah. The magic of theatre.

And the blood bag sits here?

Yeah, we put them on at the beginning of act five.

And there's a space for yours and one for Ben's?

Mm-hm.

Who has access to this area during the show?

Everybody moves around back here.

Exiting, entering, grabbing props.

Did you and Ben ever mix up your blood bags?

What would it matter if we did?

Why?

You said the props guy's really good. Is that right?

Nah, Gray Jenkins, he runs the Brokenwood Hire Costume place.

I didn't realise the Elizabethans were so advanced.

Yeah. Ben always gets a bit wheezy, mostly after act five.

Used to take a puff before the curtain call.

I heard people crying like...

I think we knocked them dead, bro.

Yeah, no, felt pretty good, alright.

We k*lled it!

Tallyho!

Is that what happened then?

What's that?

An asthma att*ck?

My guess is there's more to it than that.

I'm a suspect, aren't I?

Let's just say you're helping us with our inquiries.

I had a cousin that did that once.

Problem was, he was so good at helping with the inquiries, he ended up in jail.

Was he guilty?

Well, technically, yeah.

Mm.

Mm.

We're in a process that needs to be gone through, that's all.

So I'm free to go?

My vines won't prune themselves, although it might be wise not to associate with the other cast members until all the other witness statements are in order.

Yeah. questions for you.

OK.

Hello, Juliet. Last night did you notice anything odd about Ben back stage during the play?

Ben, yes, I remember him.

Well, I know that you knew him. I'm sorry for your loss. I understand he was your boyfriend.

We must be patient, but I cannot choose but weep, to think they lay him i'th the cold ground.

Damn medication. It's either too much or not enough. Those doctors, they don't know their backsides from their bellybuttons. Could we have some help in here, please?

Where is the beauteous majesty of Denmark?

Ophelia's lines. How now, Ophelia?

♪ How am I your true love know From another one ♪
♪ By his cockle hat and staff And his sandal shoon... ♪

Alas, sweet lady, what imports the song?

You know, I might come back later.

Yes, I think that would be a good idea. I think she may be slipping into a coma. No, no, I want an actual doctor, an actual doctor. If you don't mind, Detective.

Of course.

Ophelia.

I will send it to the ESR for more tests, but the canister, it's factory sealed.

I can't see anywhere the poison could be contained.

You could take a puff with no fear.

I'll pass.

Chicken.

What? No, no.

If you were a Russian man, you might need to prove your manliness.

But I'm not asthmatic.

That's why I respect you, Mike.

Because I'm not asthmatic?

Because you know manliness doesn't come with wrestling chickens.

Detective Sims, back again so soon.

Actually, I have a couple of questions for you, if that's OK.

Well, we're not out of the woods yet. They've told me I have to wait here in the corridor. Why? So that I wouldn't bear witness to their incompetence. I'm her mother, for God's sake.

Well, perhaps then you could spare me a couple of minutes.

The diagnosis was that Juliet was overcome with hysteria at Ben's sudden death.

You don't agree?

She's a sensitive girl. She's suffering from a much deeper ailment.

A broken heart.

Very good. Perhaps you should become a doctor. I'm sure you'd be better than those apes. Breaking a young woman's heart is not something to be underestimated. The damage can be very serious indeed. And I did insist on calling her Juliet.

The star-crossed lover. So Ben was her Romeo.

In so much as he ended up dead. At least there's one of your team who knows a thing or two about Shakespeare, unlike Samuel Breen. I saw him last night, pretending to be a detective. He avoided me, of course.

I can assure you he's very good at his job.

Oh, really? Well, perhaps he'd like to solve the mystery of the missing Year 12 assignment. It remains outstanding.

Uh, do you have any idea why Ben would want to break things off with Juliet?

He was young, foolish, insensitive and confused.

By?

Perhaps you should ask Paula Worthington about that. She fussed over him like the mother she never was.

She doesn't have her own children?

God no. Which is just as well. Who knows what kind of mother she would make? Her...her intentions towards Ben were far more than maternal.

What exactly are you suggesting?

I'm sure you can draw your own conclusions, Detective.

(PHONE RINGS)

Kristen.

Hey, according to Ruth Phelps, Paula Worthington doesn't have any children.

OK, thanks.

Good morrow, Michael.

Morning. Viola and Sebastian, I presume?

My twins.

Viola and Sebastian.

From 'Twelfth Night'.

Oh, well done.

You like your Shakespeare, Michael?

It's limited. More a country music fan, but from what I can work out, all the same things as Shakespeare, but done in three minutes rather than three hours - no offence. I thought they were your children.

In many ways they are.

Not identical twins then?

But born on the same day.

They didn't suffer too much with your late arrival home?

You might not think so, but they're carrying a very sad disposition.

They sense that Benny is dead.

He was very close to them.

Is there any confirmation on what caused Ben's death?

Not yet.

There's a rumour it was asthma.

It would seem like the most likely scenario.

Oh, my poor Benny.

Oh, I suppose the rest of the season will be cancelled.

With an actor dead and another one in the hospital, I would presume so.

What a shame!

But appropriate, I would think.

Well, yes and no.

The proceeds were to go to a charity, you see.

Awesome Orphanz.

I see.

It gives grants to orphans who show exceptional promise in a certain area, like Ben.

Perhaps when this is over... Excuse me. G'day, mate. This is Mike Shepherd. Have you collected all the rubbish around here? Right, what have we got?

Well, Ruth Phelps doesn't suffer fools. Paula Worthington...

Mm, just bumped into her. Someone who treasured Ben like a mother, she's very, um, business-like.

A mother, or maybe more.

What?

Well, according to Ruth Phelps, Paula Worthington possibly had more than a maternal interest in Ben.

OK.

Juliet Phelps is still flaking out on sedatives. Ralph St John?

Ralph St John is coming in tomorrow to complete his witness statement.

Hard to pin down.

Nigel Midlock, Timothy Ward and Billy Franks have all completed statements, as has Neil Bloom.

I remember him from the golf club case, the chemist.

Pharmacist.

Mm. OK. Cyanide.

Are we missing someone?

Who?

Jared Morehu.

Shouldn't he be up there? Just saying.

Put his name up.

I checked out all local controlled substance licence holders.

No-one reports anything out of the ordinary.

No break-ins and, to be fair, they were all so uninterested in the idea of a Shakespeare play, it was hard to sniff out any connection or possible motive from their end.

No cyanide thefts in the entire district?

Nope, although I'm yet to hit up the deceased smelly Nellie Jenkins.

Good luck with that.

Smelly Nellie?

Jenkins, old-school possum trapper.

Lives in the foothills of the Riverstone Ranges.

Completely feral.

Always trying to tempt you with a possum pie while flogging off possum skins and other by-products as the panacea to the ills of modern-day life.

Is she related to Gray Jenkins?

Hmm, don't know.

Pass.

Jared mentioned him as the props maker. Another person of interest. So, why don't you get up to this Nellie Jenkins?

Squad car's in the shop.

What?

Six month service and all the other cars are out.

Did you mention you're investigating a m*rder?

Can't fight the system, senior.

Then take mine.

Your car?

What's wrong with it?

Oh, nothing, it's just... it's your car.

Here. Don't disrespect it.

No, boss.

Right. So apart from not having a who or a why or even a how, which gives us no when, we're doing really well. Why? When? How? Who? Why? When? How? Who?

Don't mess up with the car. I'll chase up Neil Bloom.

Mm-hm. Hello. Hello.

(CLATTERING)

Anybody around? Hello. This is Mike Shepherd. Hello.

(MUFFLED YELL) (PHONE RINGS) Kristin Sims.

She can talk now, but keep it brief.

I'm so sorry.

I was fixing a hinge on the breast plate and trying it on and it got stuck.

Yeah, no harm done. Gray Jenkins, is it?

No, I'm Billy, his assistant.

Is Gray about?

No, uh, he didn't come in today. He's very upset over Ben's death.

Do you mind?

You were in the play. Oswald?

Osric, and Marcellus and Rosencrantz in the battlement scene, a small but very important part.

Right.

Although, as Ralph says, there are no small parts, only small actors.

But you're OK?

OK? Well, thanks, I guess.

Oh, no, I mean you're OK to come into work?

Oh, it's just we're so busy and then 'Flintstones', the musical, opens in Riverstone next week and we still have to finish all the fur detailing and then after 'Hamlet', there's 'Spamalot', hence I was fixing the suit of armour when... So stupid.

I'm sorry.

Any idea why Ben and Juliet broke up?

No. He just dumped her and that was that and...

And?

And she deserved to be treated better than that.

I'm sure. Do you have Gray Jenkins' address?

Yeah.

(PHONE RINGS)

What have you got?

These two results confirm what I knew. The fake blood contained cyanide.

OK, thanks. The fake blood, do you sell much of it?

Halloween, kids' birthdays. Gray makes it himself.

It's very good.

Appreciate it.

Sweetheart, you remember Detective Sims?

Yes.

She just wants to ask you a few more questions about Ben.

Actually, would you mind if...

Oh, I'll be just over there, darling, if you need anything or you feel upset.

OK.

She'll be fine.

You don't know that.

Right. What I'm trying to get a handle on is why you and Ben split up. Was it amicable?

When is getting dumped out of the blue on a cold winter's night ever amicable?

Now? What about the show?

As Polonius says, "To thine own self be true."

Screw Polonius, Ben. This is real.

It hurt, really bad.

I'm sure.

But not so much that I would do anything bad.

You're not thinking that?

Just trying to put a picture together.

Does your picture include Ben being hit on by Gray Jenkins?

In what way?

Gray was always teasing Ben about his sexuality.

Testing, flirting.

And was Ben...?

Ben wasn't interested.

He was interested in me.

And then he wasn't, but it doesn't matter now.

I have someone new.

You have a new boyfriend?

Let's just say if Ben were alive, he'd be feeling pretty jealous.

Are those flowers from him?

They're from my Hamlet.

Feeling very tired now.

OK. Thanks. Ruth, the roses, were they from Jared Morehu?

Apparently. I wasn't here at the time.

Right.

I don't believe for a second they're from a new boyfriend if that's what she's saying.

Well, she does seem smitten.

Maybe of the effects of the medication, either too much or too little. Oh!

Ruthy.

Hi.

How's our girl?

Oh, she's mending. You know Detective Sims?

Yes.

Any news about things?

We're working on it.

Asthma, it's a dreadful business.

It would help if we had all the completed witness statements.

Yes, I apologise. It's been a ghastly day. I'll pop in tomorrow.

Please.

How fares my Juliet?

That I ask again, for nothing can be ill if she be well.

Daddy, another bouquet.

Popular girl. They're from your cast of 'Hamlet'.

They want their Ophelia back.

Daddy?

Didn't you know, Detective? A union over The Bard led to a permanent connection but we choose to maintain separate lives.

Who are you?

DC Sam Breen, Brokenwood CIB.

Not a cop car.

Actually, it is. It belongs to my senior.

Watch you don't trip.

What do you want?

A routine check on your cyanide supplies.

I've got a licence.

I know, and with that licence comes security requirements that are subject to random checks.

Oh!

Well, get in here then.

Keep it all in there, locked.

OK, good. Can you unlock it? Wait, are you serious?

Well, I don't want to lose it.

There you go.

I'm guessing you don't keep an updated register.

I know what's what.

Yep, still good.

Plenty in that one.

Oh, that one's expired.

Ah, no, thanks, that's cyanide.

Relax, it won't k*ll ya.

Unless you're an idiot.

Are you an idiot?

No.

Then chuck it in the bin.

You can't just chuck the stuff in the bin. It's cyanide and you can't have the key out in plain sight.

Hardly no-one comes up here, so it's not a problem.

How old are you?

25.

Mm.

Lot of lines around your eyes for 25.

What?

Stress?

No.

You should try some of this.

Smear it under your eyes. Makes the lines disappear.

What is it?

Possum fat. I use it all the time.

I'm good. Thanks.

Your loss.

Do you know a Ben Faulkner?

Nup.

21, used to perform with the Brokenwood Theatre Society.

Used to? Crap, was he?

Dead, actually. Cyanide poisoning.

Oh, I don't go to the theatre.

Are you related to Gray Jenkins?

Is that what this is about?

What?

Has Gray been up to no good with that young Ben boy?

Meaning?

Gay, that's Gray's preference now.

Right. But you're not related?

Oh, I didn't say that.

So you are related?

Nup.

What then?

Oh, don't get shitty with me, boy.

We're only related in so much as he was once my husband a long time ago, but that's all.

I've got nothing to say about him.

Is that it? You done?

No reception?

Who cares? I wouldn't touch one of those things with a barge pole.

They'll give you cancer, sure as a bull will hump a heifer.

Right, thanks for your time.

Hey, you sure you don't want some?

I'm good.

Flat battery.

I don't believe it.

Might have to stay the night.

Tracking down Gray Jenkins.

Are you alright?

Yeah, yeah, all good. Hey, could you pick me up in a bit? 56 Middleton Road.

Are you on foot?

Yeah, doing my bit to save the planet.

I'll be there.

Neil Bloom, isn't it?

Detective Shepherd.

I was looking for Gray Jenkins.

You're in the right place.

Right. So...

He's sleeping.

He barely got a wink last night. The news about Ben destroyed him.

I see.

Gray is my partner.

You don't live so far out of town anymore?

Well, separate dwellings, but I stayed over last night, consoling Gray.

He can call you when he wakes.

Thanks.

Do you need a glass of water?

Yeah, I'd appreciate that, yeah.

Just wait here.

Ta. You were very good in the play, by the way.

Oh!

Great beard. I like the line about how you've got to be honest with yourself.

"To thine own self be true."

Hm, that's the one.

Thanks. That's a nice part, probably my favourite line.

Being a gay man in a small place like Brokenwood, it has an extra resonance.

Maybe Ralph hasn't been.

Ralph? St John?

The postie. Amateur theatre doesn't pay the bills, Detective.

I was to be Claudius, actually.

I'd even learned the lines, but it was not to be.

Why's that?

There was a last-minute reshuffle.

Because?

Ralph was to play Hamlet, but he was, of course, too old.

The Society voted for Ben, but in the end he wasn't up for the task.

Seems a good actor to me.

Ben was a nice kid, but not as talented as some might have thought.

So, Ralph found Jared by chance and the rest was a happy accident, as they say.

I'm not sure Ben would see it that way. Ah, my ride. Thanks for that. Actually, one other thing - as a chemist, do you stock cyanide?

Detective, as a pharmacist, I dispense dr*gs to heal people, not k*ll them.

I'll take that as a no.

You do that.

So, that was the detective.

Mike Shepherd is very thorough.

We need to be very careful.

Ralph St John is Juliet's father.

Oh! Does that change anything?

I don't know yet, but Ruth Phelps has got serious attitude about life, love and doctors and Juliet, who after being dumped by her boyfriend, then seeing him die in front of her eyes all in the space of two weeks, thinks she has a new boyfriend.

Who?

Jared Morehu.

(PHONE RINGS)

Mike Shepherd. I'd appreciate that. See you soon. Gray Jenkins is suddenly up and about, wants to meet at the costume company. Can you double back?

You could drive yourself. Or not.

Well?

It's not as bad as it looks, OK?

It just needs a new alternator.

I had to walk for an age to call for a tow truck.

I mean, well, what did you find out?

Oh.

Um, Nellie Jenkins has a lot of cyanide under lock and key in the loosest sense of the term and she used to be married to Gray Jenkins.

How long ago?

20 years.

He came out, it was all over.

That alternator was original, by the way.

Probably why it needs replacing.

What's that under your eyes?

I don't want to talk about it. I'm taking a shower.

No point.

Why not?

There's work to be done and showering might be pointless. What you're looking for is small, silver, plastic and if you find it, handle with extreme care.

This is about the car, isn't it?

No, it's about finding the metalware. Working late, Mr Jenkins?

Just making up for lost time, Inspector.

Rough night, I hear.

We all lost a dear friend.

Makes you wonder what the point of it all is sometimes, doesn't it?

Doesn't Hamlet say something like that?

Over and over and over.

Ben was a talented boy.

It's such a waste.

Was your relationship anything more than professional?

Could we deal with a couple of facts?

Facts are what I'm here for.

Firstly, the Brokenwood Theatre Society is amateur, not professional.

A mistake Ralph often makes.

There's a big difference.

And secondly, Ben was straight.

I had a lot of time for him, but that was all.

You make the props for the play, I understand?

And costumes. It's my contribution to the Society.

But you're an actor.

I'm more comfortable behind the scenes now.

Could you show me how these blood bag devices work?

Oh...an elastic bandage, drawing pin, small water balloon, filled with fake blood.

That you make yourself?

Yes, and that is covered with an adhesive paper-based plaster.

That you get from a chemist?

Pharmacists stock them, yes.

And that is strapped round under the costume and the actor clasps it like so.

You have blood on your hands.

Fake blood. Cochineal, maple syrup, coffee, water.

Nothing else?

No.

So not rocket science then.

Anybody could do it.

Well, anyone with access to all these bits and pieces.

Well, they're all commonly available.

In amateur theatre we have to make a little go a long way.

Do you have any access to cyanide?

What?

Cyanide, do you have any use for it?

That's a strange question.

Not if you're someone who uses cyanide.

Is that what took Ben?

Not necessarily.

Oh, it is.

As I said, not necessarily. But you have no access to it?

No. Never.

Detective, I had nothing to do with Ben's death.

I wasn't even at the performance.

But you set up the props table.

Well, yes, I do that each night. The blood capsules and the blood sleeves, parchments, etc, but then I leave.

Ruth Phelps is the stage manager.

She looks after everything.

Not a Shakespeare fan?

I love Shakespeare.

I hate 'Hamlet'.

Now, if you have no further questions, I really must finish the 'Flintstones'.

♪ When you won me over You took my heart... ♪

I have Ralph St John in for his witness statement.

Oh, good.

Mm.

Not good?

Hm. (MAKES MOCK-expl*si*n NOISES)

Did you see anyone that didn't belong there?

No.

Mind you, it's frightfully busy back there, but if there was anyone, Ruth would have shooed them away.

Right. You and Ruth were married?

No, we share a beautiful friendship through a wonderful daughter.

Juliet, who's a very good actress.

Very.

I thought Jared Morehu was very good too, for the record.

Yes, in a raw, primal way he has that quality of a savage glistening in the sun, bathed in sweat, speaking the language of the gods.

While wearing doublet and hose.

You may poo-poo, Detective, but by honouring Shakespeare's period, we are feeling the language through the filter of the clothing, hessian, silk, pantaloons - authenticity.

"I thank the stars I am happy. I will be strange, stout, in yellow stockings and cross-gartered."

Ah, Malvolio. You know The Bard.

I studied him in university.

Yes, yes, study, study, but have you ever let him actually flow through you, stood on a stage and allowed yourself to be a vessel?

You mean, have I ever been in a Shakespeare play?

Yes.

No.

Well, perhaps you should try it.

I offer classes, you know, in acting and vocal technique.

I can see you as a marvellous Lavinia in 'Titus Andronicus'.

That's a kind offer. Would you excuse us? Would you think any less of me if I vomited on your shoes?

I can get a bucket.

That man is the kind that gives Shakespeare such a bad name.

I couldn't possibly comment.

For the record, Lavinia gets her hands chopped off and her tongue cut out.

Shakespeare, eh?

Yeah. Bet you don't get that with Patsy Cline.

Sorry, if we're done, Detective, could I have a private word?

Sure. Please, take a seat.

No, I won't keep you long.

This is a most awkward thing to ask. I'm in a pickle, you see.

Paula Worthington has asked me whether it's possible to continue the season.

Of 'Hamlet'?

Yes, yes.

I said, "Paula, darling, no, no, we can't.

An actor has passed away.

It's insensitive."

I would have thought so.

But it's for her charity, you see.

Awesome Orphanz is her charity.

Yes, yes, and Paula thinks it would be the perfect way to honour Ben's memory.

What do you think?

How could we go on?

Imagine performing that monumental play each night knowing that one of us isn't there anymore.

Then say no.

Paula's a very forceful type.

I was wondering if perhaps there was a legal reason we couldn't continue.

The stage and backstage area are a crime scene. Until our investigation is complete, you wouldn't be able to use it.

Brilliant.

I shall tell her forthwith.

Mm.

That comes as something of a relief.

He worked with Sir Ian McKellen, you know.

Right.

You don't know who he is, do you?

Sir Ian...

McKellen. We worked together on 'Rings'. Fabulous actor.

He played Gandalf in 'The Lord of the Rings', 'The Hobbit'.

Of course.

You never saw 'The Lord of the Rings'?

I've got this thing about hairy feet.

Is this where you tell me a story about one of your ex-wives? Sorry. I didn't mean...

I don't believe any of them had hairy feet.

Well, good. I mean, not that it would matter.

Well, it would to me.

Obviously.

Do you want to change the subject?

Yes, please.

Yeah. Paula Worthington wants the show to go on.

What's that about?

In the name of charity. You've crossed out this guy.

Timothy is the most sensitive forklift driver I've ever met.

(BLUBBERS) I'm just so...

I'm so...

I'm just so...

So sad.

Yeah.

I doubt he has the emotional constitution for m*rder. I did learn something interesting, though, when I asked our witnesses why Ruth Phelps wasn't in the play.

She's kind of bad.

Ruth's a really good stage manager for sure.

Actually, her acting is a bit like fingernails on a blackboard.

She's not very good.

Ruth is an academic. She acts with her head, rather than her loins, plus she has some strange ideas. And all those in favour of Ruth's idea that Hamlet should be played as a woman by her, raise your hand. Oh, Ruthy, not this year... Again.

Hamlet as a woman?

Mm, very avant-garde. The point is, Ruth Phelps had a serious axe to grind with the rest of the Brokenwood Theatre folk.

For being snubbed.

Possible.

But why pick on Ben? Why not Paula?

Well, the only thing she likes more than Shakespeare is her daughter. Ben hurt her daughter. Motive?

But until we know how the cyanide was administered, it's difficult to know who had the opportunity.

Why? When? How? Who? What?

Yeah.

Senior.

Yes, back on the road.

Joyride?

Oh, it's always joyous.

Man: To be, or not to be, that is the question.

Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them: to die, to sleep.

Oh, Billy, there is so much to do.

But it's my lunch hour.

But as long as an hour is an hour.

Billy.

I... I was just leaving.

He thinks he's in love.

Is that a bad thing?

Oh, to be young again.

Swings and roundabouts. Billy's an asthmatic?

Isn't half the population these days?

Something's bothering me. I'm wondering if maybe you could help me out.

As long as you don't mind me keeping on working.

Not at all. Your aversion to 'Hamlet', what's that about?

How's that important?

Humour me.

I played Hamlet myself back in the '70s when I was a professional actor. It was quite a famous production.

Good for you.

Not really. I played the whole thing with a paper bag on my head.

OK.

It was the '70s, that sort of thing was very de rigeur. Some said it was cutting-edge. Some said it was incredibly moving. Most just said it was really hard to hear what I was saying.

Probably quite hard to see as well.

The director was trying to put across the metaphor that Hamlet was blinded by his indecision. Stumbling about just added to that effect. After that, I was done with the damn play.

At least Ralph St John doesn't have any crazy ideas like that.

He doesn't have many ideas at all.

He has worked with Ian McKellen, though.

Oh, please. He was a dead orc, third corpse from the left in the Battle of Helms Deep. Ralph tends to exaggerate his resume and talent.

Why didn't you mention your connection to Nellie Jenkins? When I asked about cyanide. She's licenced to obtain and possess cyanide.

There's no connection.

Apart from you being her ex-husband.

I have nothing to do with that woman. She's a bigot, a tedious, odious, not to mention odorous woman.

She's also a supplier of possum skins, which, if I'm not very much mistaken, are what these are.

I haven't seen her for years.

So these furs are not from her then?

Anything I have to do with my mad ex-wife is purely business.

So they are from her? Have you been up to her place recently?

No, I have not.

Has she paid you a visit?

I have already said, I haven't seen her for years.

OK. That's all, thanks.

We need to talk now.

Excuse me.

Ruth, hi.

I'll take those. She's just in there. Don't stay too long. She tires easily. Go on, off you go. Just in there.

How are you feeling?

Hello, Billy.

I brought some flowers.

Your mum's just getting a vase. I see you already have some.

Aren't they amazing?

Hey, are you OK to talk?

I mean, I don't want to impose.

No, it's fine. It's really good to see you.

Your dad called.

Um, there's talk that the play's going to resume.

Isn't that great?

So soon?

Yeah. I'll finally get my chance to play Laertes.

Good for you.

Do you think that you'll be up to it?

I'm not sure.

'Cause, like, I was thinking that you could focus your confused feelings in the part.

Billy...

I mean, we could run lines.

Billy, slow down.

Yeah.

Sorry. It's just Laertes.

I mean, wow!

Are you going tomorrow?

Yeah, of course.

And Jared?

I guess so.

I mean, everybody will be. Why?

I think that's enough. Thanks for the flowers.

Yeah, I should go.

Bye-bye.

I'll see you tomorrow.

Sure.

Bye.

Hallelujah! I'll get this over to Gina.

So, what have I missed?

Not much. If that's the smoking g*n, at least we can focus on opportunity, but motive?

'Hamlet', what happens?

Well, a prince suspects his uncle of k*lling his father.

He can't decide what to do.

Everyone dies.

Perhaps you should write that down and give it to Mrs Phelps.

Then you'd be investigating two murders.

Well, not if you said Hamlet was a woman.

What? Really? Hamlet as a woman.

Breen...

Yeah?

Shower?

Right.

Hamlet as a woman.

So...

I look at all these people and what do they have in common?

Love of theatre.

Mm, specifically a love of 'Hamlet'. What if the answer is in the play?

Good luck with that.

Academics have argued over centuries over its deeper meaning, but for me one thing is clear. Hamlet had major mother issues, which is why he treats Ophelia so badly and says some ambiguous things about what he'd like to do to Gertrude. Hamlet is both a mother-lover and a mother-hater.

What has this got to do with Ben?

No, I'm thinking about the mother.

Paula.

I just spoke to her again.

I loved Ben, but he was no saint.

Meaning?

As if it wasn't bad enough breaking Juliet's heart, he then had the gall to up and die on stage in front of her.

Not that it was deliberate.

He was a troubled boy.

I wouldn't put it past him to stage something grand and ridiculous.

Are you saying he could have been suicidal?

I'm saying he was troubled.

In what way?

Ben was a boy gifted with too much attention.

When he lost his parents, many in the Theatre Society took it upon themselves to tend to his every need. Ruth Phelps in particular.

Turning him into a Shakespeare prodigy.

He was smothered, if you know what I mean.

Well, no, I'm not exactly sure.

Oh, Ms Sims. Take the 'S' off smothered, and what do you get?

The real mother in the fray, Ruth Phelps, the only one in this whole scenario with an ounce of motive. Ben hurt her daughter, she wanted him to suffer.

Well, then, the same would apply to Ralph. Juliet's his daughter too.

Oh, yeah, but does he really care about Juliet as much as his play? He is so self-absorbed. I think not. What if Ruth didn't mean to k*ll Ben, but was just trying to send a message?

Cyanide, that's some message. Let's see if we've got the smoking g*n first. How is it?

Tough day at the office, eh?

Hey, have you been following my advice?

Yeah, always.

What advice exactly?

About not associating with the other cast members.

Oh, yeah, I've just been here.

You sure?

Did these vines prune themselves?

Did you like Ben Faulkner?

Uh, yeah, he was OK.

What do you think about Juliet?

She's a bit young for you, Mike.

What? I'm not talking about... What about Ruth Phelps?

I definitely wouldn't go there if I was you.

I'm not talking about going there with any of these people.

Yeah, because you know the female praying mentis bites the head off the male praying mentis after they've mated.

Well, that's Ruth.

Just ruthless.

Ha-ha. Thanks for the insight.

I'll have these players play something like the m*rder of my father before mine uncle. I'll observe his looks. I'll tent him to the quick and if he do blench, I'll know my course.

Senior.

We were hoping for a word. We have something of a confession to make. Well, Gray does. I'm moral support.

Alright.

We realise we need to front-foot this before any rumours and false allegations arise.

I'm all ears.

We talked about this. Honesty is the best policy.

I admit to having been somewhat infatuated with Ben.

It was a foolish thing.

Destined never to go anywhere because...?

Ben was not gay.

Or interested. Gray made a couple of clumsy overtures after a few too many wines.

How about this one?

No.

Great, I need a bigger rapier.

Talented and beautiful. What's your secret?

I think we're done here.

You old fool.

Gray, I need a longer rapier.

For Christ's sake, find it yourself.

It wasn't a secret.

It was a clumsy secret. As embarrassing as it is, I...we felt it was important to come clean.

Mm. Was it just the once?

There were several public displays.

Granted, I humiliated myself, but...

But he was not driven to any kind of homicidal rage in case anyone should cast such aspirations.

Now, we have a funeral to attend.

Thank you for your candour.

It's been a very emotional time.

I'm sure. Tell me, Neil, by any chance, did you fill Ben's prescription for his vaporiser inhaler?

As a matter of fact, I did, why?

Is it a common brand?

The most common these days.

Billy Franks uses one too.

Yes.

Anyone else in the cast?

Not that I'm aware of.

OK. Thank you. Neil, one more thing. When did you last fill Ben's prescription?

Oh, three...no, four weeks ago. I remember he'd lost his.

"To be, or not to be," Ben, please!

Sorry, I just...I need my inhaler.

Where's my inhaler?

Here, use mine.

That's a sure way to spread illness amongst the cast.

That was the beginning of the end for Ben as Hamlet.

Hamlet can't be an asthmatic.

Ben is lovely and he's trying.

To be... (WHEEZES) Or not to be.

Really, it's amateur.

We are amateurs, Ralph.

Only in so much as we don't get paid, but that is no reason to set anything other than professional standards.

I suppose I may have to do it.

A hundred years ago. Hamlet is a young prince, for heaven's sake.

Quite.

Well, best you find someone ASAP.

I can but try.

Is that how Jared came to be involved?

Mm. A happy accident, as they say.

How all occasions do inform against me, and spur my dull revenge.

Oh, my goodness, Ralph. What a find.

How did you feel about Gray's attitude to Ben?

The course of true love never did run smooth.

♪ Only tears Is that all I can do? ♪

And as we say farewell to Ben, we remember his vitality, his love of life and that, though taken far too young, he was loved by those around him.

♪ No need for such a show... ♪

And so earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust...

Now pile your dust upon the quick and dead. Till on this flat a mountain you have made. T' o'ertop old Pylon...

Pelion.

..Pelion in the skyish head of blue Olympus.

Marvellous.

You right, mate?

Come on. Come on.

Jared?

Oh, no, she's right.

I'm sorry, this feeling just came over me.

Not at all, it was very apt.

Well done, Billy.

You are a star, just waiting to shine.

And, as we know, Ben was a supernova in a night sky filled with baby stars.

We miss you, Ben.

Paula.

Thank you, thank you, Ralph, and thank you, Ben. Ralph and I have been talking and in Ben's name we feel that it is appropriate that we carry on. Billy, you have thoroughly proven with your fitting tribute to Ben that you're more than capable of taking on Laertes. And the rest of us will just cover, that is assuming that our Ophelia, Juliet, is fit and well.

Ready and willing.

Those in favour, raise your hand.

I.

Bravo!

Bravo, Ben!

After what we discussed, aren't you jumping the g*n?

Paula was very insistent.

The venue was still a cordoned area.

Yes, it was then that she pointed out that we simply move to a park, perhaps, in true, travelling player style.

Ralph, while I admire your enthusiasm, it wasn't the venue that k*lled Ben. It was someone quite possibly in your cast that did.

But it was an asthma att*ck.

Asthma can be triggered in different ways.

Someone in this room?

Possibly.

I find that hard to believe.

Well done, you gorgeous man. Such fortitude. Don't you think, Michael?

Mm.

Thank you for the flowers.

Flowers?

Playing coy.

The beautiful bouquet that you sent with my dad.

Remember, they're from your Hamlet. He wants his Ophelia back. He loves you very much.

Yeah, no, I'm not really a flowers guy.

Then I feel all the more special.

No, I mean, I didn't actually...

Sending my father as an emissary, I mean, kind of old-fashioned, but very romantic.

You know, it's really sad what happened to Ben, but there's always a silver lining and we have to carry on, don't we?

I see. I didn't send them, eh?

How could you say that?

Don't say that.

I got to tell it like it is, eh?

Have you no heart?

Do you know what I've been through?

I have to rest.

What have you said? What have you done this time? Really, now, speak.

What's with the flowers?

Sorry?

Juliet said you delivered flowers from me, but I didn't send any.

Yes, I delivered flowers, but not from you.

They're from your cast of 'Hamlet'.

They want their Ophelia back.

They love you very much.

It's the medication, I would think. She's young and confused, but really, Jared, you need to be more sensitive.

Maybe you need to find another Hamlet. I just...

Hello, another diva was born.

(PHONE RINGS)

Really, Ben's wake too.

Gina.

You have the mind of an assassin. The inside of the inhaler's mouthpiece was laced with cyanide paste. When the victim took off the cap and depressed the canister, it would have dispensed a little amount straight into his lungs. He would have inhaled deeply, thinking it would ease his asthma. It would have acted with fury.

Let's go through it again.

OK. Someone wanted Ben Faulkner dead. The reason, yet to be determined.

They switch his inhaler. He essentially executes himself, then the perpetrator later dumps the inhaler in the rubbish bin.

Inhaler, sophisticated. Rubbish bin, clumsy.

Suspects?

Billy Franks who wanted to play Laertes and now may get his chance.

Is that reason to k*ll?

In or out?

In. Neil Bloom?

Could have been trying to eliminate Ben. Jealous of Gray's affections.

Jealousy beats amateur theatre aspirations, in my book. In.

Are these images off Ben's phone?

Yeah.

King of the selfie, eh?

On the other hand, Gray is the only one with an obvious connection to the poison.

He swears he hasn't seen Nellie in years.

But he made the props.

In the end, it wasn't a prop that k*lled Ben.

In or out?

Leave him in. Ruth Phelps?

Wanted to hurt Ben for hurting her daughter. Wanted to hurt Ralph for not letting her perform.

In.

Ralph St John.

Tosser of the year, put a play ahead of everything else.

But why would he m*rder someone who was making him look good?

Ben was good, wasn't he?

Oh, depends on who you talk to. In. Juliet Phelps, in. Paula Worthington?

Yeah, who coveted Ben, but one would have to say seems very keen to move on in the interests of her charity. Why do people insist on making things plural with a 'Z'?

Is the charity legit?

Ben is the sole beneficiary and Paula is one of two trustees. I'm still tracking the other one down.

In. Four days in and we've managed to put everyone back up on the board. And we haven't proved that any of these people have actual access to cyanide.

Well, maybe we have.

Senior.

Here. That's Ben with Billy Franks.

Yeah.

That building, it's Smelly Nellie Jenkins' place.

So Billy was up there with Ben.

Which means Billy had opportunity.

And someone else, whoever took that photo.

Well, yeah, it's not a selfie.

No, they're doing that dumb gangster stuff with both hands.

So presumably it was Nellie.

She wouldn't touch a mobile, reckons they give you cancer.

Someone else took that photo.

DSS Mike Shepherd. Ms Jenkins, do you recognise these boys?

Maybe.

Yes or no?

That's Gray's little man Friday.

Gray told me that the two of you have had nothing to do with each other for the last 20 years.

He's right about that.

Then how do you know that Billy is his man Friday?

Came up here to buy skins.

You sure you don't want some?

No, thanks.

And Ben Faulkner was with him?

No, that was another time.

Billy's visited twice?

Why? What's it to ya?

Did you take this photo?

No.

Then who did?

Might have been the brown boy.

Brown boy?

Yeah, Maori fella.

Jared Morehu.

Rings a bell. There was a bunch of them.

You told DC Breen that no-one comes up here.

I said hardly no-one comes up here. Check your facts.

Then who?

Nellie.

No.

Ralph, I don't know. Probably gone by then.

Ralph St John?

How many Ralphs do you know?

What were you doing up there?

Rehearsing.

The beauty of the world...

He reckons the place is a natural amphitheatre.

The paragon of animals.

Good to practise our vocal technique, mainly because Ben and Billy were asthmatics and needed to develop their breath control.

Oh, treble woe, fall 10 times treble on that cursed head.

Up you go, Jared.

No, I'm all good. I felt like an egg.

Why was Ruth there?

Stage manager, prompting lines.

Why did you go to Nellie's?

Well, she rumbled us.

What the hell are you fellas doing in my gully?

Next thing you know, we're back at the hut.

Got pies.

We're fine.

Nourished by the language of The Bard.

Hey, I have just helped too much with your inquiries?

No.

(LAUGHS)

Well, here he comes.

Good morning.

Bang on time this morning, Bill.

Thank you, Jean.

You know Detective Shepherd.

Yes.

Oh, let me get you a cup too.

What do you take?

Gumboot with milk.

Oh, right.

With a view like this, who would want an office job?

Yeah, I suppose so.

Up here, I imagine you could almost get the same resonance as Echo Gully.

If that was the case, I wouldn't go all the way up there.

Echo Gully has a remarkably unique quality.

Yes.

As does Nellie Jenkins' tea, I understand.

I wouldn't know.

Really?

Some of us went up to Echo Gully for a sojourn. Nellie invited us in and served some extremely odd tea, yes, but I didn't drink it. Echo Gully is where we go to practise vocal technique.

Ralph, why did Mrs Malik call you Bill?

What I do here is merely another role that I play.

Bill, the postie.

Something like that - bringing the news, important news.

Ralph...

Bill.

Bill, I strongly advise you not to go ahead with the play.

I couldn't agree more, but I fear that train has left the station. Paula has contacted the press. It's a sell-out. Like you, I feel very conflicted. You know, there's a rehearsal tonight for Billy. Perhaps you could come along and make sure everything went well.

I might just do that.

But, now, if you don't mind... ..I really must go. See you tonight. Bye, Jean.

Bye.

There you are then.

Off he goes.

Thanks. Tell me, why Bill and not Ralph?

Bill as in Buffalo Bill of the Pony Express, the bringer of news.

The mail must go through.

Yes. Bill always says, "Without me, people would be cut off, stranded in suburbia with only the tice of internet."

Yes, mail is the last bastion of true human connection.

Then Shakespeare, I expect.

Oh, of course.

Wasn't Jared a wonderful Hamlet?

Mm.

So it's true then?

What's that?

Young Ben Faulkner was practising h*m* with Gray Jenkins.

No.

Oh!

It's an ongoing investigation.

Of course.

You hurt her again in any way, I will deal to you, you understand?

You need to calm down, Billy.

You need to stop acting like Casanova and start considering people's feelings!

Billy, what is going on here?

Why don't you ask Hamlet pants? He sends her flowers, romances her and then denies it, makes her even more confused.

Threatening people is a serious offence.

Oh, yeah? Up there with heartbreak?

I understand you've been up to Nellie Jenkins' place?

So what?

Were you ever there on your own?

No.

What about when you went to pick up the skins for Gray?

I don't know, maybe.

Was Nellie with you there the whole time?

Yes.

Are you sure?

The place stinks, nothing could make me stay there a moment longer than necessary.

Not even the chance to play Laertes?

I don't know what that means. I have to go.

So, have you been getting it on with Juliet Phelps?

No.

Seriously, she's not even my type.

I've got to go to rehearsal.

I thought you might be chucking it in.

Yeah, well, the show must go on and all of that, eh?

Yah! Yah!

Ow, OK. Chill out, dude. I will deck you.

Stop! Stop! That is not the line. Focus, please! And where is Juliet?

She's unwell, Ralph.

But we must rehearse.

Yah!

A hit. A hit. A palpable hit.

No, it's not.

Are you looking for a part?

Oh, I'm looking for something. You're not meant to be...

Already dead.

Oh!

I'd leave but I have to wait for notes.

It's the rhythm, you see. Mimics the heart, the b*at of life, baboom, baboom, baboom, baboom. Everyone, please.

Baboom, baboom, baboom, baboom.

What do you make of all this?

I'm a Shakespeare Luddite.

Mm, not the Shakespeare, this group. Gray wanting Ben, Ben not loving Juliet, but Billy does, yet Juliet has the hots for Jared, who's decidedly uninterested. Ruth is estranged from Ralph and, Ralph, well, he's completely asexual. Gets his kicks from being both mother hen and stern father to them all. That is the thing about amateur theatre. Everyone is trying to sleep with everyone else.

Stop! Stop! Everyone, please. Really, must you? Your talking's very distractive.

Apologies, Ralph.

When I suggested you come, it wasn't to be disruptive.

That was not my intention.

I appreciate you being here, I really do, but, please, as a courtesy, be as quiet as you can. Picking it up from where we left off, please.

How does the Queen?

She swoons to see them bleed.

No, no, the drink. Oh, my dear Hamlet, the drink. The drink. I am poisoned.

Let the door be locked. Treachery, seek it out.

The King is to blame.

Then venom to thy work. Yah! Treason!

Treason!

Oh, yet defend me, friends, I am but hurt.

Here, now, thou incestuous, murderous, damned Dane. Drink this poison. Is thy union here?

Oh, damn it. Jesus Christ.

That's not the line.

Dude, are you alright?

Ralphy?

He's not acting, is he?

Ralph! Ralph! Ruth! Ruth! Ruth!

An ambulance!

I'll try...

Call an ambulance, please.

Oh, the 'Brokenwood Courier'. I can see the headline now - 'Death-defying Performance'.

Oh, so kind of you to come.

We're pleased we're still only investigating one death, not two.

Believe me, so am I.

Ralph, you crashed the blood capsule in your teeth.

Yes, after Hamlet wounds me. There's nothing unusual in that.

Except that it contained cyanide.

Yes, well, if I'd known that...

The doctors said it's a miracle I'm not dead.

It is.

It seems whoever laced that capsule didn't use enough.

Who would do such a thing?

Whoever it is targeted Ben and now you. Do you have any idea why?

No.

Is the blood capsule something you carry or is it given to you?

Ruthy hands it to me just before I go on.

But that was just a rehearsal.

Technical rehearsal so Billy would know exactly what was going on.

And Ruth gets them from Gray Jenkins?

Please, Ruthy wouldn't, no.

But we have to consider all the options.

You should get some rest.

It was a sell-out, you know.

The performance?

Critics from the city were coming.

It would have been lovely for the cast.

Better that you're alive.

I owe you an apology.

It seems you were right all along.

One of these people wanted Ben and Ralph dead.

It's got to be Gray Jenkins.

Motive?

He doesn't like Ralph.

He doesn't respect him. I'm not sure if he hates him.

He wanted to sabotage the play.

Why? His partner Neil was in it.

How much does he care about Neil?

He admitted he hated the play and he k*lled Ben because of some jealous response to being spurned.

Very Shakespearean.

Or country and western. Just saying.

Sabotage, you reckon? Really? I say we search his premises, bring him in for a formal interview. We might be able to hold him on the basis of what comes to light.

Gray? No, I don't believe it.

He's yet to be charged, but I thought you should know.

But why?

Well, hopefully the reasons will come to light after a full interview. I admit to being none the wiser over this, though.

He means many things to many people.

That's The Bard's magic.

Oh, the cordon's been lifted on your stage. You could proceed with the charity performance now. Up to you.

If only I had the strength.

That Ralph St John put in his mouth.

Well, he's an idiot, isn't he?

He nearly d*ed.

For God's sake, the capsules, they pull apart, anyone could have put anything inside them.

Did you?

No.

Did you poison Ben Faulkner?

I most certainly did not.

Your partner's a pharmacist, he'd be pretty handy with capsules like these.

He doesn't deal in fake blood.

What about cyanide? Oh, no, that's your ex-wife, isn't it?

I have never handled cyanide.

I guarantee that these capsules do not contain any trace of cyanide.

In fact, I'll show you.

Hey! Oh, Christ, that's evidence.

You see? You see?

There's no cyanide here, you see?

OK, that's just really messy. Let's get you cleaned up.

Get me cleaned up. Get me a bloody lawyer.

That went well.

Crazy bastard.

Still think he's the one? You better hope the SSG comes up with something. The perpetrator didn't expect us to find the inhaler. They wanted us to think that the blood bag on Ben's sleeve k*lled him. They wanted us to think that Gray did it.

Or he's playing a double bluff.

Or... Some research on what Munchausen Syndrome by proxy where mothers hurt their own children to seek attention. We should reconsider Ruth Phelps.

Is this about how Hamlet is all to do with mother issues?

What if she's been deliberately harming Juliet, both physically and psychologically?

She kills Ben to get at Juliet?

That's a way of hurting her.

But Ben had already dumped Juliet?

Yeah, but you saw the way his death affected her. She had a complete breakdown and then mummy steps in to care for her with all the attention of the medical world at her beck and call. I mean, it's textbook stuff.

Then why hit Ralph?

Well, just as Juliet is bouncing back, she hurts her again. This time by hurting her father.

The same father that wouldn't let Ruth act in the beloved play.

I told you she was a psycho.

She was the stage manager, Mike, in charge of the props table. She had all the time in the world backstage to switch those inhalers.

And we can place her at Nellie's hut.

Well?

It doesn't explain one thing. How did Ralph manage to have a cyanide pill crushed in his teeth and survive? Whoever it was that planted that capsule was either trying a copycat k*lling and they didn't know what they were doing or...

Or they were trying to send a message and knew exactly what they were doing. (PHONE RINGS)

Kristin.

The SSG have come back negative on cyanide at the costume company and Gray Jenkins' home.

Right.

Should I let him go?

No. I have a question for him.

I'll have grounds more relative than this. The play's the thing wherein I'll catch the conscience of a king.

Hey, hot off the press. "Mr Ralph St John, a personal friend of Sir Ian McKellen, is delighted to announce that the show will go on. Despite losing an actor to a fatal asthma att*ck and himself suffering a recent hospitalisation, Mr St John says the Brokenwood community deserves theatre of a professional standard. With all proceeds going to Awesome Orphanz, tonight's show is a sell-out."

That says a lot.

Yeah, about Ralph St John's massive ego.

I think you're right about the Munchausen's thing.

Seriously? Can I get Ruth Phelps in here?

Let me talk to Gray Jenkins first.

Where's my lawyer?

My question isn't about you, it's about putting on a play.

Well, if I don't like what you ask, I won't answer.

Fair enough. Billy Franks was the understudy for Laertes.

Yes.

So who was the understudy for Hamlet?

No-one. The role was too big. No Hamlet, no show.

Well, you could do it. You've done it before.

Oh, 40 years ago, yes.

What about Ralph? He must know it.

Detective, there are 30,000 words that Hamlet speaks, plus he's too old.

Every male actor thinks they have the definitive Hamlet inside them.

In the end, most of them get too scared to try or are never asked.

The rest are often terrible. Most of them get too old and the chance passes them by.

At least I had my chance, paper bag or no paper bag.

And Ralph never did.

And never will, which is why he resents me so much.

You should get yourself cleaned up.

Oh, hey, I've just realised if Ruth Phelps wanted to hurt her daughter, who would her next target be? Who was she in love with?

Jared. Best we get to the theatre.

I can't go on knowing Jared thought I was a joke.

Oh, nonsense.

You'll be magnificent.

And men like that, they get what they deserve.

That boy does not deserve you.

Alright, places, everybody.

It's beginners, standby.

Hey, you can do this. We can do this. Please, for me. And especially for your father.

Ga, ga, ga, ga, ga, ga.

Red, yellow...

Yee, yee, yee, yee.

Am I late? Am I late?

We had an earlier call.

Yeah, I didn't get the message, and why are you wearing my costume?

Jared, we've talked amongst ourselves and decided that you will be stood down as Hamlet.

What?

All this nonsense, playing with the young girl's emotions.

Jared, it's bollocks, mate.

Really crap, actually.

We can't have you falling apart on stage, mate.

And we weren't sure quite how far you would go.

What's going on?

As Ralph is the only one with the working knowledge of the part, he will play the title role.

Yeah, good luck with that.

Ladies and gentlemen, the role of Hamlet tonight will be performed by Ralph St John. Thank you.

Hey! Hey! You're OK?

Bit of hurt pride, but, yeah, why?

Taking cyanide, that's a hell of a way to move the spotlight off yourself.

Excuse me?

That must have taken some guts, but then you did have the amyl nitrate.

Pulls out all the ageing toxins in your skin. Stop it. Come here. I can't lift ya.

What are you talking about?

The casing of the ampoule I found in the Theatre Society toilets. Still, if you're going to mess around with cyanide, it pays to have the antidote handy too.

An ambulance, please.

Damn plastic, wouldn't disappear. Like the inhaler in the bin.

Are you aware there are over 150 people out there waiting for the show to begin?

Mm, yes.

I don't have time to read the paper.

Oh, but it's all about you. It's the interview you gave before we spoke to you at the hospital.

Well, I gave many interviews.

Meaning you had already decided that the show would go on.

There are some very influential people in that audience who will not appreciate being kept waiting.

You knew there was no danger because the danger could only come from you.

Critics from the city.

And why's that, Ralph? They were all here to see what the commotion was about. This play has garnered incredible attention for all the wrong reasons.

It's a marvellous production.

See, that's the bit I couldn't quite work out. Until my esteemed colleague, Detective Sims, posited the notion of Munchausen's by proxy.

What is this nonsense?

Detective?

Where a parent deliberately hurts her own child in order to seek attention. In 78% of reported cases it's a maternal perpetrator, but..

In rarer cases it's the father. Ben was expendable. You knew you had Billy waiting to step up.

This is nonsense.

Nonsensical nonsense.

k*lling Ben was hurting the thing you love the most, your precious play, to get the eyes of the world on you. Having first doctored the blood bag to point the finger at Gray, you then engineered to play the title role yourself by casting Jared as the bad guy, ensuring that your Hamlet would be seen by all the most important people and that long, overdue recognition would be rightfully yours. Isn't that right, Ralph? Or Bill or... whoever it is you think you are.

Listen, this has to wait till after the show.

What, arrest you later so that you can fulfil your dream?

So many people, you see.

To be...

Or not to be...

Ralph St John, I'm arresting you for the m*rder of Ben Faulkner.

Using your own flesh and blood. You sad, pathetic man. Jared? Where's Jared? Jared, you're on.

Should we get this show on the road? Let's go break a leg, Billy.

Ladies and gentlemen, excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, another change to this evening's show. The title role will again be played by Jared Morehu. Thank you.

Sorry about before.

Love your work, really, Jared.

We can do this.

OK, here's the thing.

I would have handed in that assignment, but I thought my thesis was too radical.

I always thought to gain a better insight into Hamlet's psyche, he should have been played as a woman.

Really?

Yeah, crazy, I know.

Well, that's a shame. You would have received an excellence for it.

♪ We got thrown together By some good fortune ♪
♪ Down in the wilds of November Toward the quarter moon... ♪

Who is there?

♪ Somehow we kept connected... ♪

Nay, answer me. Stand and unfold yourself.

♪ Just made it up as we went along ♪
♪ I've never dreamed for the life of me ♪
♪ We'd still be singing this song ♪
♪ It goes don't let go Don't let go ♪
♪ Don't let go... ♪
♪ No, don't let go Don't let go... ♪