01x03 - Power Play

[bunniefuu]

Chase, what you doing?

Oh, I just reinforced all the windows with an impenetrable polymer I designed to keep this place safe from any thr*at.

Oh, yeah? Well...

I just made myself a grilled cheese.

Mm, something smells good.

Yep, that's my sandwich.

No, smells more like reinforced polymer.

Oh, you.

Oliver!

I'm sorry. It was an accident.

I'm still trying to get the hang of my powers.

Oh, you poor thing.

It must be so hard for you.

Skylar, that's not what I meant.

No, no, no.

Thank you once again for reminding me how you have powers and I don't.

Alien chicks, am I right?

I still don't get it.

If Skylar was born a superhero, then why doesn't she have any powers?

She used to, but a human turned mutant named the Annihilator drained them out of her, put them on a shelf as a trophy.

Okay, I'm sorry, but you have to agree.

That just sounds ridiculous.

Look, if Skylar's gonna be a part of this team, then I have got to figure out a way to get her powers back.

No, I have to be the one to get her powers back.

Why you?

Because. Then she falls in love with me, then we get married, then we live our happy little superhero lives together forever in a space castle.

You know, in your funny yet creepy little world, I believe that could happen.

I've been trying to get her powers back for years.

So far, no luck.

Well, that's 'cause you didn't have my vast scientific knowledge to help you, and now you do.

I'll even give you all the credit so she thinks you're the hero.

Thanks, buddy. You're the best.

One day, I'm gonna do something for you.

You could start by getting me a towel.

How's it going down here?

I think I might be on to something.

If Skylar was born with powers, then the cells that created them are still inside her body; they're just dormant.

So if science applies, which who knows if it will, since we're dealing with...

Well, let's just call her what she is.

A freak.

We might be able to stimulate those dormant cells.

Does Skylar have any weaknesses?

Nope. She's perfect.

Although she'd tell you that one of her knees is higher than the other, but I know that's not true.

I've measured them many, many times.

I meant physical weaknesses.

Doesn't every superhero have one?

There's a chemical compound in coal that's harmful to her.

I've seen it; it ain't pretty.

I couldn't even look at her knees.

Great.

Then if I use coal to shock her immune system, it should wake up the cells.

No, Chase, you can't give Skylar coal. It's too dangerous.

In abundance, yes.

But a trace amount should safely stimulate the regeneration of her superpowers.

Oh.

I wish I had thought of that.

Good news. You just did.

Hey, Skylar, guess what.

Don't tell me.

You've just discovered another power.

What now? Can you sh**t torpedoes out of your nose?

No, I thought I could a few weeks ago, but turns out it was just a sinus infection.

Anyway, I, Oliver, have been working with some of Chase's lab equipment, and I, Oliver, think I, Oliver, have found a way to restore your powers.

You did?

Yes. I, Oliver, did.

He did?

Yep. He, Oliver, really did.

And I would know because I, Chase, am the smartest guy in the world who comes up with the fixes for everything.

Except for this.

But, you know, I could've, if I wanted to.

But he didn't.

Right.

But I could've.

But he didn't.

See? That wasn't so bad.

You made us stop on all 110 floors.

Look, Bree, if I have the opportunity to push a button and make it light up, I'm gonna do it.

Why is there a pig in our hallway?

I'm guessing he came into some money on the farm.

Hey, little guy, how'd you get up here?

Well, I'm sure he didn't press every button on the elevator.

Oh, Petey, there you are.

Oh, thank you for finding my dear pet Petey.

Wait. This pig is your pet?

Yes.

Awesome.

I've always wanted a pet pig.

Look at his tail It's got a little mind of its own.

It's very nice to meet you.

I'm Bree, and this is Kaz.

Oh, lovely to meet you. I'm Mrs. Ramsey.

You know, everyone's been wondering what sort of classy people would be moving into the penthouse.

Come on, Petey.

Give me a kiss.

Hit me with that porky pucker.

(Laughs)

Yeah, that's us. Classiest kids in town.

You must be a pig person.

Oh, now I know this is out of the blue, but I have to visit my daughter this weekend.

Is there any chance that you'd wanna watch Petey for me?

Of course.

No.

Kaz, we're not pig-sitting, okay?

There are already three teenage boys in this penthouse.

The last thing we need is another disgusting animal.

I'm sorry.

I was unaware you are pigaphobic.

Look, I'm sorry, Mrs. Ramsey, but you're gonna have to find someone else to watch Petey.

But it was really nice to meet you.

Oh, well.

Come on, Petey. This one doesn't like you.

I'll take the elevator down with you.

How sweet.

Oh, I hope you don't mind a long ride.

Petey just loves to push all the buttons.

Come on, he's perfect!

I can't believe this is really happening.

I've waited so long to get my powers back.

Well, my dear, your wait is over.

The serum!

It's not ready.

I'm sorry. My assistant informs me there will be a slight delay.

Can I make you more comfortable?

Would you like to put your feet up?

So you can measure my knees again? No, thanks.

How exactly is the serum gonna work?

Well, uh, you see... the serum will be, uh...

Injected.

Injected... into you, thus...

Activating.

Activating the...

Cells.

Cells... which...

Are currently dormant but innately have superpowers.

Just trust me, Skylar, I know what I'm doing.

The serum is ready.

Whoa. It's a big needle.

Do you have anything in chewable form?

No. But if you prefer, I can administer the injection.

No way, Frankenstein. This is my beautiful monster.

Yeah, it's all you.

Okay. There you go.

(Sighs)

I don't feel anything.

Oh, well, it will take some time for the serum to kick in. Right, Oliver?

Oliver?

Sorry. I'm a little woozy.

Okay, Skylar, sit back, relax, and the medical software will wirelessly monitor your vitals.

Yes, and you'll have your powers back in a matter of minutes.

Hours.

Hours!

Mm-mm. Lunch is served.

And then, after you're done, I'll draw you a nice mud bath.

Bree: Hey, Kaz.

Uh-oh.

Hey, have you seen my purse anywhere?

Uh, no, but, um, good luck searching everywhere but here.

Eww.

What are you eating?

Oh, that. That is, uh, that is my lunch.

Recycled vegetables.

(Laughs) Is it a carrot, is it a beet?

Who knows?

Oh, that's neither.

(Petey grunts)

What was that?

What was what?

(Petey grunts)

That.

I was snoring.

Sorry, but you're not the most interesting person.

And you're not the most clever.

Okay, it's not what you're thinking.

You brought the pig here behind my back?

Okay, it's exactly what you're thinking.

Kaz, I thought we agreed that bringing the pig here was a bad idea.

I know, but I told you, I've always wanted a pet pig.

It's just one weekend.

No, I'm gonna call Mrs. Ramsey right now and take him back.

Too late. She already left to go on vacation to see her daughter.

Okay, well, I'm sorry, but he's gonna have to stay with someone else.

I guess I could ask the guy who lives downstairs.

You know, the butcher.

He said he would watch him.

Until dinner.

Okay, fine. He can stay.

(Crashing)

Just keep him away from me, and clean up that big mess.

I think you mean that pig mess.

Okay, I'll go get a mop.

Good work, Petey.

(Squealing)

Hey, you found Bree's purse.

I bet it was in the last place you looked, right?

Every time.

Look what your hero brought you.

Flowers for your new superpowers.

(Both screaming)

What's wrong?

Uh... nothing.

You're just shockingly beautiful.

Like, so beautiful, I have to look away.

None of my powers have kicked in yet.

I don't think the serum did anything.

It did something.

This is bad.

Yeah. I mean, it'll be a little weird being the good-looking one in the relationship, but I'll get used to it.

I'm serious.

Her body is rejecting the serum.

The coal must be deteriorating her organs from the inside out.

So are you telling me we just...

k*lled her.

Something's wrong, Oliver.

I don't feel good.

Why haven't you found the antidote yet?

You're supposed to be perfect.

You know what really helps in a high-pressure situation?

You interrupting me every five seconds to ask me why I haven't found the antidote yet.

Sorry.

But have you?

I knew we shouldn't have given her coal.

You gave me coal!

Coal?

Is that what you heard? That would be crazy.

Why would I inject you with your one true very lethal weakness?

(Stammering)

He did it.

Okay, yes, I was the one who suggested shocking your system with coal, but I've also said that you should never mix superpowers with science.

When did you say that?

Just now. Keep up.

(Coughing)

I must've given her way too much.

Her body's rejecting it and expelling it as a vapor.

Is it dangerous?

Just to living things.

Petey.

Petey, you can come out now.

The butcher only wanted to borrow a cup of sugar.

Let me guess.

You lost the pig?

No.

We were playing a game of Hide-and-Seek, and I underestimated his skills.

Yeah, I lost the pig.

Kaz, the door's open.

Oh, no.

Petey!

Why are you looking up?

You know that expression, "when pigs fly."

Yeah, and do you know the more accurate expression, "when pigs plummet to the street"?

Petey. You're alive.

Why'd you close the door?

I didn't.

I think Petey did.

Okay, that's ridiculous. Pigs can't close doors.

(Lock activates)

But apparently, they can lock them.

Okay, stand back.

I'll use one of my powers to break the glass.

You can't. Chase just reinforced all the windows.

They're unbreakable.

We're stuck out here unless we can get Petey to press "unlock."

Hey, little Petey.

Come here.

(No audible sound)

Bree: Come on, you can do it.

We're in luck. Mrs. Ramsey's back early.

Wait, how did she get in?

Hello!

Hi. We're...

Good-bye!

I don't believe it.

She's a thief.

And Petey is her muscle.

I told you taking that pig in was a bad idea.

Okay, but to be fair, you were worried about him making a mess, not engaging in a pig-people partnership to rob us!

Okay, using my force field to seal in the vapor was a good idea.

We still have enough time to figure out an antidote.

Okay, good.

(Skylar coughing)

Uh, Chase, what's happening?

(Coughing)

I thought you said your force field was impenetrable.

It is. It's built to withstand lasers, b*ll*ts, even atomic explosions, not alien freak gas.

I told you that was gonna happen.

What? When did you tell me that?

Just now. Keep up.

If that gas escapes, and spreads into the vents, it'll k*ll everyone in the building.

That's thousands of people.

I think you know what has to be done.

You're holding an electric toothbrush; I got nothin'.

No.

This is a sonic de-atomizer.

It'll stop the vapor at its source by sending a lethal blast of energy through her body.

Lethal?

Yes.

The only way to stop the vapor from spreading is to destroy Skylar.

Absolutely not. Give me that thing.

Mine!

I'm not letting you destroy her.

That girl means everything to me.

She's the reason I wake up in the morning.

I can't imagine a life without her.

(Coughing)

The gas is coming out.

I'm taking that space witch down!

(Gasping)

Skylar!

You're okay.

I'm not. That's cool. Focus on her.

And you just used one of your superpowers.

I did?

I did!

I guess all that vapor was just part of the healing process.

So then the serum worked.

Yeah, it totally did.

And it's all because of...

Chase.

Chase? What about me?

You were about to destroy me.

What?! No, I would never.

This is, uh... (Stammering)

Oh, come on. Not my video games.

You're a monster!

Oh, wait. Those are Oliver's.

Never mind.

Hey, Bree, what'd you do last night?

Oh, nothing. Just got fleeced by an old lady and her pig.

Hey, look. There's an open window.

I can fly up there, sneak in and surprise 'em.

Great. What about me?

Use your super speed.

For what?

I don't know.

I'm just trying to make you feel useful.

How about I make my bionic kick useful?

Well, that about does it, Petey.

Let's head over to Big Sal's pawn shop on Fifth Street.

You're not going anywhere.

How'd you get in here?

It was easy.

How did you train a pig to steal?

I had to.

The ferret wasn't pulling his weight.

Well, the game's over.

I'm here to stop you and Petey.

Speaking of which, where is that adorable porker?

(Petey squealing)

Usually, I don't roll without my sil*ncer.

But this'll do.

Oh, look, it's a pig.

Kaz, you've always wanted a pig.

She's got a g*n!

Look out!

You guys okay?

Yeah.

My faith in pigs is a bit shaken.

Wait. Skylar, did you just...

Yep. I got my powers back.

Wow. Good job, man. You finally did it.

Actually, it was Chase.

Oh, that's gotta sting.

Can't believe I was duped by a barnyard animal.

Again.

The police officer said Mrs. Ramsey's been using the pig for over a year to break into dozens of high-end apartments.

But now they're in custody, all thanks to Skylar.

Really we should be thanking you.

You're the guy who got Skylar's powers back.

We get it. Chase is great.

He's the best thing ever. Everyone loves Chase.

You know, I always thought I'd be using my powers to stop an asteroid or something, but I guess stopping a pig from stealing video games is a close second.

We should go out to dinner to celebrate.

That's a great idea, Oliver.

Are you sure it wasn't Chase's?

Actually, it was.

Hey. Hey, guys!

Guys, what are you doing? I'm still out here. Guys!