01x08 - The All-Night Bus Ride

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Roadies". Aired: June 2016 to August 2016.*
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"Roadies" is an insider’s look at the reckless, romantic, funny and often poignant lives of a committed group of "roadies," who live for music and the de facto family they’ve formed along the way. The music-infused ensemble comedy series chronicles the rock world through the eyes of music’s unsung heroes and puts the spotlight on the backstage workers who put the show on the road while touring the United States for a successful arena-level band.
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01x08 - The All-Night Bus Ride

Post by bunniefuu »

Phil: Previously on Roadies...

Bill and Shelli.

That's like your parents having sex and cheating on each other all at the same time.

How was your day? Tell me everything.

Sean had someone hide a birthday gift for me in the seats.

Right, congratulations. It's nice.

It can't be true.

People actually think that I'm... I'm hooking up with Reg?

Why don't you s*ab my f*cking eyes out and blind me so I no longer have to witness this g*dd*mn travesty?

I find it incredibly sexist that people think I'm making love to him in his spendcentric socks.

You worked with my favorite band of all time, the original Lynyrd Skynyrd.

This was given to me in 1976 by Ronnie Van Zant, and I have not taken it off since.

Who's Robbie Van Zant?

Phil: Who is Ronnie Van Zant?

There's a tradition on this adventure, and you need to bone up on whose shoulders you're standing on.

You are invited to leave the organization now.

Let me just talk...

About you f*ring me...

Listen, Phil. I did not fire you.

Preston fired you. I was just the messenger.

This is a... This is a very special day.

Phil: Get on in here.

Get you some. God I missed you people.

God I've missed you people.

[bluesy music playing on phone]

[knock at door]

♪ ♪

[knock at door]

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

Hey, front desk ain't answering, Bill.

sh*t.

Hey, come here.

You got your cell on you?

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay, I need you to call the police.

[touch-tones beeping]

[pounding on door]

Yeah, hey, I'm calling the cops about a possible situation at the Marriott.

You're... you're on the phone with the cops now.

Uh, yeah, sorry.

It's okay.

His name's Phil.

Right, Phil Valentine.

Phil Valentine.

Right.

What the f*ck is it that you want?

Oh, sh*t.

Phil, put that down.

You're alive.

Of course I'm alive.

My body wakes up when I'm needed.

Easy, White Buffalo.

Jesus, did I oversleep?

Yeah, we... we're all good. Phil's okay.

Yeah, you overslept.

But thank you, cops.

Hey, I'm on probation.

What are you calling the cops for?

They're not coming.

You weren't answering, man.

Why is everybody freaking out?

Is it... Is it daylight savings time?

Phil, I-i-it is not daylight savings.

That was two months ago.

sh*t.

It's all right. [clears throat]

Now, just listen to me, okay?

There was a b*mb scare at Cory River Arena, okay?

So we're gonna leave early to get to San Diego for the Funko corporate gig that Reg arranged.

That limey douche bag m*therf*cker.

He's actually turning out to be not that bad.

A rattlesnake makes a pretty little noise before he sinks his teeth into you, Bill.

And a rattlesnake is trained to do one thing, bite you, k*ll you, and move the f*ck on.

Now, what time you need me on the bus?

[Tyler Lyle's "California" playing]

♪ ♪

♪ I'm not sorry I fell in love ♪
♪ I'm not sorry ♪
♪ That you never cared enough ♪
♪ It's just motion, it's just time ♪
♪ Every day we find ourselves ♪
♪ By myself ♪
♪ The next time you see me, well, I'll be someone else ♪
♪ There ain't no gates around heaven ♪
♪ Ain't no gates round hell ♪
♪ Just the sunset ♪
♪ In the distance ♪
♪ And the dark on its tail ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Well, I did right ♪
♪ And I did wrong ♪
♪ You did too ♪
♪ That's not why ♪
♪ I'm gone ♪
♪ It's just motion ♪
♪ And it's just time ♪
♪ Every day ♪
♪ We find ourselves ♪
♪ A little further down the line ♪
♪ I'm going to California ♪
♪ By myself... ♪


Bill: Phil, what can you tell me about the European leg of the tour?

'Cause I'd heard that...

Shh, Dead Sex.

I think Jen's alive.

Rick: Harris DeSoto, Rick Davidson, head of search operations.

Remember how surly you got with me when you told me that she d*ed in the Plague?

Remember that?

I knew you were wrong.

God, do I hate myself for loving this show.

But it's g*dd*mn powerful stuff.

You can't escape us, Harris.

Now, we need to take you back to the center to have sex to see if there is hope for the rest of us and for the future.


It's embarrassing, you and me watching this, two grown men.

None of you understand the burden of having to father an entire new generation.

I mean, well, we should be watching a documentary or something.

Yeah, a documentary...

about the making of Dead Sex.

Harris: I'm not a god.

[sighs]

It's gonna be a long one tonight.

That's what I told my old lady the first time we were about to get naked.

Gooch, I'm coming to you with a... a problem.

About what happens when this tour ends?

How did you know that?

It's in the air, baby.

Nobody has a retainer but Shelli.

That means this whole crew could break up, you know.

They could find cheaper people in Europe.

That does happen.

I'm just really f*cking worried that I'm gonna lose something special, you know?

This feeling on this tour.

Yeah, you know, you say that, but what I'm hearing is, "What am I gonna do without Kelly Ann?"

Yes.

Let her go, Milo.

She already traded you in for a real Englishman.

No... no, she didn't.

That... that's just, like, a rumor.

Look, you're good-looking. Plus, you're tall.

And lately you've been smelling moderately better.

Thanks.

I mean, look, there's no reason why you can't find someone that's wonderful and equally odd.

I don't want this tour to end.

Wesley: All right, take it away, West Coast.

[upbeat, twangy music playing on guitar]

All right, y'all, I got it from here.

One, two, three.

♪ Now, beer, beer, beer, beer ♪
♪ I can find it near or far ♪
♪ And I drink my beer out of cans and bottles ♪
♪ sh*t, I'll drink it out of this guitar ♪
♪ Guitar ♪
♪ Now, I love beer ♪
♪ And you love beer, man, f*ck it, so does Bill ♪
♪ Bill doesn't drink anymore ♪
♪ But he did when he saw Phil ♪

[laughter]

Oh.

♪ ♪

Have you heard any more about the European dates?

No.

Everybody's asking, though.

Tell me about it.

Wesley: All right.

woman: All right.

Wesley: ♪ Give me a joint, and give me a fire ♪
♪ Hell, I don't need no amplifier ♪
♪ 'Cause one of these beers right here will turn me up ♪
♪ We got 12 more hours on this bus ♪
♪ And sorry, Phil, I don't mean to cuss ♪
♪ But God damn it, Gooch, hurry up ♪

Milo: Yeah!

Ahh, this is gonna get old.

[mellow rock music]

What are you gonna do when this tour ends, Kelly Ann?

Kelly Ann: Hmm.

I don't know.

I mean, the band's holding dates in Europe, unless they bag 'em.

I bet our boy with Extantion has got something to do with that.

He's in the front with Harvey right now.

I don't care if he's up my ass making shepherd's pie.

The end of the tour reveals all.

He's going over the financials right now on this very bus, who gets a retainer, what vendors get cut.

It's true.

I think it's all being decided tonight.

I can smell it coming like a steak house fart.

Kelly Ann, you're the only person who'd get the truth out of Reg.

I got to know if I'm still on this tour.

I got Halsey's people calling.

Apparently, she's trying to steal our whole crew.

♪ I can't sit or stand around... ♪

Hi.

Hi.

Reg, I think you need to tell everybody who's gonna be hired to go on the European leg, 'cause...

I just think people are really desperate.

Well, now, I just... I just assumed that everyone was going.

It never occurred to me that... That everyone wouldn't go.

I just assumed that it would continue intact with the, uh... With the same crew.

At least that was the... that was the recommendation that I made.

You did?

Yeah.

Thanks, this will really soothe the crew.

Yeah.

Ooh.

Harvey.

Kelly Ann.

[upbeat bluesy rock music]

♪ ♪


Hey, Phil, can I ask you a naive, silly question?

I'd be surprised if you didn't.

Wesley: How'd you get mixed up in all this, you know, like, the music and the touring and the badassery?

Well, we don't have time on a 12-hour bus ride to fully answer that question, but the short answer is this.

You don't pick it.

It picks you.

Okay, but who was the best, Phil?

I mean, who was your band?

Nah, I got to be in the right mood.

What the f*ck mood are you waiting for, man?

We're on a bus for 12 hours. Just tell the story.

Yeah, well, you got to have a few more rings on your tree before you can push a button and demand my expertise.

Phil... tell the story.

♪ ♪

All right.

[laughs] Nice.

Now, to tell this story properly, I got to introduce you to a man, my father.

They ran a bait shop.

I used to hang out in the back from a young age, and I definitely new this, at my father's back office, they never talked about bait.

Fellas, I can't make it to Atlanta with the cigars.

I mean, who is this guy?

He's a promoter, Vince Packard.

He works with rock bands.

We just need someone to drive them to him in Atlanta.

He's been a big customer.

He needs 'em tonight.

I'll go.

Phil Sr.: You know, I remember this guy Packard back from when we had that Asian Zircon mail-order situation going.

Pop, let me go.

Son, you may be on to something.

No one would think twice about him crossing any state line.

Les: Well, you're right.

Just look at that honest face.

Phil: Well, the next thing I know,

I'm delivering a big box to a promoter in Atlanta doing a show at the Omni.

Now, it's The Who and Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Now, I don't know music at all, all right?

But I'm nervous, but I'm excited.

Right before I leave, my dad says, "Listen..."

Make sure you get paid, okay?

It'll be in a yellow envelope.

Uh, Father, am I doing something illegal?

Would I let my own son do something illegal?

Vince: Ah, the illegal Havanas are here.

All right.

Thanks, kid.

All right, you enjoy that show, all right?

Uh, well, I-I need a yellow envelope.

It's all taken care of. Enjoy the show.

B-but Father said that I need an e-envelope.

Mr. Packard.

♪ Ooh-ooh ♪
♪ Ooh-ooh-ah ♪
♪ Double b*ating... ♪


Phil: Sometimes destiny has a way of walking right into you, walking right through you.

♪ ♪


Uh, Mr. Packard, I was thinking about our conversation, and I know for sure that you're supposed to give me reciprocation in a yellow envelope.

I don't know what you're talking about.

I'm quite sure that I'm right.

Excuse me.

My name's Ronnie Van Zant.

My band Lynyrd Skynyrd's opening up tonight for The Who.

If you owe this man something, you've given him your word, you should pay him.

Otherwise, I got no reason to play for you tonight or ever.

Now, do what's right.

You really want to get involved in this?

Oh, yes, sir. I do.

And I got a whole bunch of people out there with me who feel the same way.

sh*t, I was always gonna pay him.

Right now.

Come to my office.

[Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Gimme Three Steps" playing]

I'd wash that jacket if I were you.

What's your name?

Phil.

Phil.

You better just go on home before somebody comes after you with a loaded firearm.

Your luck ain't pretty tonight.

Oh, I think it is.

I appreciate you getting me paid, and sorry about your black eye.

I don't know much, but I know when somebody sounds honest and when they don't, and you sounded honest.

Well, I-I look forward to enjoying your music sometime.

No time like the present.

I got to get back to Texas and help my dad run his bait shop.

Playing Fort Worth tomorrow.

Phil: I was with 'em for three days, and I'd never seen anything like it.

Lynyrd Skynyrd would play these amazing sets and then go find the perfectly wrong bar.

[all speaking indistinctly]

[upbeat country rock music]

♪ Well, I pulled out of Pittsburgh... ♪


What kind of place is this?

Are you sure you don't want a drink?

Oh, no, I don't... I don't drink.

Well, you can't say no if you never tried it.

Oh, well, I don't need to try it.

You should meet a gentleman by the name of Mr. Jack Daniel's.

♪ But I don't see a cop in sight ♪
♪ Six days on the road ♪
♪ And I'm gonna make it home tonight... ♪


[coughs]

It's good stuff, right?

Ooh!

You got a girl back home?

I sure do.

She's mean as hell, but I love her.

You gonna marry her?

If I'm lucky.

[laughs]

Oh, I like Jack Daniel's.

So does he.

You Lynyrd Skynyrd?

You tough guys think you can come in here and drink?

Your band ain't sh*t compared to The Allman Brothers Band.

You may be right about that.

Easy. We ain't gonna fight.

You ain't gonna fight?

How can you live with being a hypocrite, man?

I read about you guys being so tough.

I don't see nothing!

Excuse me, but you're bothering Mr. Van Zant.

♪ ♪

I don't mean nothing.

♪ But I could never make believe it's all right ♪
♪ Six days on the road... ♪


Look at that.

The hell got into you?

I don't know what got into me, except he was being an assh*le.

Whatever it was, boy, I'd hang on to that.

Oh, I just did what came naturally.

Hey.

Hey.

Reg.

Harvey, come and look at this.

I don't know.

There's no easy answer, is there?

Phil: And they had about five solid hits under their belt, great songs, and the one true classic, "Freebird."

Right.

But in the day, everywhere Skynyrd went, one of the guys would get drunk or somebody'd get drunk, and the sh*t would start flying.

And it was for that as much as their songs they became known.

And that's all anybody outside the band wanted to do or talk about was fighting.

Is that when you started drinking?

Well, Mr. Jack Daniel's and I have had a love affair that has lasted to this very day, but he holds nothing compared to the feelings I had out on the road.

Phil Sr.: Lynyrd who?

It's a band, Pop.

It's... it's a group of people from Florida, and I enjoy their company.

[Lynyrd Skynyrd's "T For Texas" playing]

♪ ♪


I raised you to be my partner.

I found something else I like better.

I left home for 18 months while Skynyrd toured every city you can imagine.

Now, Ronnie had a foolproof method for clearing up the hangovers.

Pure oxygen can cure a hangover in five minutes.

♪ Give me a T For Texas ♪
♪ Give me a T for Tennessee... ♪


I barely made it home for the birth of Vernon, my son, and, boy, was Ella mad.

I still got the picture in my wallet.

Let's see.

Yeah, she looks f*cking pissed.

[laughter]

Well, I had the problem that we all have.

What, you didn't particularly want to go home?

Phil: Exactly. - Mm-hmm.

I became the assistant road manager known to many a hotel manager.

I became indispensable to 'em.

woman: They smashed my lights, two tables, and my neon sign.

That's $1,000.

Oh, well, I'm here to settle the bill.

And then came the Canada incident.

Ron Eckerman and the assistant road manager, Dean Kilpatrick, and I told everybody not to bring any dr*gs, I mean nothing, and everybody threw everything away back in the States.

Did you see what they wrote about us in CIRCUS magazine?


"They'll fight anybody anywhere."

Who puts this stuff out there?

I don't know, Ronnie.

All I do know is that everybody likes a bad boy.

You might be right about that.

Mm-hmm.

I felt respected by 'em, you know, part of the family.

Billy: Hey, Phil.

Phil.

What?

Could you hold my bag?

Sure, brother.

♪ ♪

♪ Give me a T for Thelma ♪
♪ Woman made a fool out of me ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Give me a T... ♪


Phil: Now, I knew at that moment I was ready to go to jail for these boys,

'cause I believed.

But I sure wasn't comfortable.

We found cocaine, quaaludes, a lot of seed-filled marijuana.

Now, something tells me that doesn't all belong to you.

You don't even have to speak.

Just nod your head, and you walk.

Does this bag belong to the band?

Sir, I'm gonna tell you the truth.

Now, the leader of this band, whose bag this is not, will be greatly affected by this incident, and I believe him to be one of the finest gentlemen you could ever imagine.

He gave me stand-up work, and he did the same for every one of them boys outside that window.

And he is struggling right now with the band and helping them grow.

And if you arrest him, all they'll be known for is arrest and v*olence.

But if you let him go, he's gonna turn this group around.

See, he is the soul of this group, and he is the future of what music is gonna be.

Ronnie Van Zant.

He's gonna be one of the greatest of them all.

His music is gonna last forever.

Now, you can help him, or you can hurt him.

It's in your hands.

Well, you don't get the dr*gs back.

Thank you.

Birth of Phil right there.

Milo: f*ck yeah, dude.

Right there, man.

Shelli: Hallelujah.

[laughter]

How did you feel about them using you to bring the dr*gs across the border?

Truthfully, I felt disrespected.

Hmm.

And for a year or so, I took work elsewhere.

They left to make an album with Tom Dowd, and I went to work with Pink Floyd.

But I'd always hear from Ronnie, my birthday, Christmas.

[telephone ringing]

Production. This is Phil.

Ronnie: How you doing there, Phil?

Ronnie, how's it going, man?

Ohh, brother, I don't want to go this next round without you.

And I want you there when we open up for the Rolling Stones.

Look, I don't need you for long, okay?

We're going to London at the end of summer, but we're gonna stop early.


I want you there, Phil, and, God damn it, you owe me.

I rescued you from a life of selling shitty Cuban cigars.

I couldn't. My wife, she's...

She would b*at me.

She's mean.

I need your help, Phil.

♪ I paid my dues, and I changed my style... ♪
You went, didn't you?

Of course.

[laughs] My boys, man, Skynyrd.

Yes.

Phil: Well, Ronnie added another guitarist, Steve Gaines, and his sister Cassie on vocals and two other singers together called The Honkettes, and that band was on fire.

Everybody had an assignment.

Shut the f*ck up.

You boys are gonna take this chance and do it.

That's it.

Otherwise, we can leave it all alone right now.

I realized something.

I didn't get into this to be a footnote.

I want all of us to be great together.

Now, I didn't ask to be your daddy, but I will, and like my daddy kicked my ass, I will kick your asses raw.

Pull it together.

Any one of you m*therf*ckers who ain't built to go the distance, you just go right now.

I ain't f*cking around.

Leave right now.

♪ ♪

Good.

Now, let's go kick the f*cking Rolling Stones' bony English asses.

I love this story.

Bill, you remember when SHB opened for the Stones?

Yeah, it was with Lenny Kravitz and them in Virginia, and yeah, I remember it didn't go well.

There was a nude guy sunbathing two rows in.

Phil: Course there was.

'Cause opening for the Stones is the toughest gig in rock.

It's like performing for a f*ring squad.

Whoever you are, that audience does not give a f*ck.

And... but Ronnie said to us one time, he said, "On any one day, any band can be the greatest band in the world."

And he wanted Lynyrd Skynyrd's one day to be that day they opened for the Stones, and we trained for that day like it was the Olympics, which it was in a way.

He rebuilt that band and was ready to take no prisoners, and he was gonna start by taking down the biggest band in the world.

We practiced every day for three weeks in a shack out in the country, and there would be no drinking, there would be no fighting, there'd be no messing around.

Just pure magic.


The plan was to catch 'em by surprise.

Let 'em fill the dressing room with liquor.

Let everybody think it was gonna be a good old drunk and brawlin' Lynyrd Skynyrd.

But when them boys showed up, they hit that stage on all eight cylinders.

And as the sun went down, under a silly orange stage with that big Rolling Stones tongue they were not allowed to walk on, the full band delivered the best show I have ever seen or will ever see.

Eighty-five thousand people.

Not one person left to piss.


They tore it up.

[laughs]

That's right.

And there was Ronnie walking between Allen, Gary, and Steve, runnin' the band, the father figure, the coach, the leader.

It was the birth of that band as a global act, and you could see Ronnie.

Soon as he knew they were killin' it, he's just pushin' those boys further down that big orange tongue, and I turned around, and I saw the whitest m*therf*cker I'd ever seen in my life.


This guy had no color at all. And it was Mick Jagger.

And he had to follow that.

Shut the f*ck up.

Oh, my God.

Phil: It wasn't a performance.

It was a street mugging.

Now, how do you top that?

You just do.

And you don't have to do it alone.

You get there with the help of your crew, everybody together,
band and crew.

You can do anything.

And that kind of connection only happens once or twice in a lifetime.

[cell phone chiming]

That's weird.

Hey, everything okay?

Oh, God.

Um, Sean's father passed away.

Yeah, yeah, I'm here.

I know, honey. I'm so sorry.

I-I can't believe it either.

Yeah.

Just a sec.

Um, yeah, okay, I'm... I'm gonna try to get off the bus.

Gooch, we got a problem.

Shelli's got to fly home.

Sean's father d*ed.

Yeah.

Yeah, just got to get her home. You got any ideas?

We could get a flight out of Redding Airport.

We'll pull over in Weed.

[Cocteau Twins' "Iceblink Luck" playing]

♪ ♪

♪ I'm seemin' to be ♪
♪ A little alive... ♪


All right, I'll... I'll let you...

[mouths word]

Um, I'll... I'll call you from the airport, okay?

All right, bye.

Hey, Bill.

♪ ♪

♪ Expose the daughter ♪
♪ Of yourself well ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Me, I think ♪
♪ That you're in her heart ♪

♪ ♪

♪ You're the match of Jericho ♪
♪ That will burn... ♪


Uh, Kelly Ann?

I just wanted to, uh... [laughs softly]

I feel like I've been a little bit of a, uh, clown.

Oh, Milo.

Yeah, I know.

It's never gonna happen.

Well, I want to be stirred up and filled with passion.

I mean, that's what Phil's story is all about, passion and where it takes us and...

I think Phil's story is about destiny, where it leads you.

Do you take the path of the unknown, or do you just chicken out and do whatever it takes to make the next dollar?

Attention, store customers.

This is the weed police.

I will be confiscating all of your marijuana this evening.

God, I love weed.

[laughs]

Ooh, jerky.

Try this one. This one. This one.

[Robyn Hitchcock's "The Ghost In You" playing]

If you can just pop the trunk, I got it, thanks.

♪ ♪

♪ A man in my shoes... ♪


Each one kills you in a different way.

♪ All the papers lie tonight... ♪

Right, Bill?

Not like this, though.

♪ ♪

♪ Is the news of the day... ♪


Everybody's talking about the tour ending.

You know, Phil's story has me thinking.

I don't know that I'm built for this forever.

The other day, I found this old hard drive from when I was 16.

And I read this letter I wrote to myself.

I mean, just incredible stuff about dreams and what I wanted out of life.

I mean, it was like the child me grabbing the adult me by the collar and saying, "Hey, be f*cking bold."

You know, it was filled with such power, dude.

I wanted to build a school in India.

I was 16.

And, you know, I thought about it, and I said, "Okay, well, this used to be me, and it still can be," but I've piled so many layers of sh*t and doubt over myself that I barely even recognize me.

It was like I knew me better before I was even me.

I don't know; it was just an amazing piece of writing.

Of course it was. It was my hard drive.

I wrote that about me.

sh*t. Are you kidding?

No.

No wonder it sounded like me but... better.

Because it was me.

Even when you question your entire life, you are taking things from me.

Well, here.

You take it, then.

It's awesome.

You know, it's like the story Phil's telling.

Get connected with where you started.

♪ ♪

So you think I'm a coward. Is that it?

I don't know what you're talking about.

I just heard what you said about me.

I'm chickening out.

I was talking about myself.

I'm questioning sh*t.

I know Laurie and our future kid is my destiny, and I'm scared.

Well, for your information, I'm f*cking... lost.

So there.

I just said that to the sound girl.

Do you have any idea what's going on?

Look, I wish I had an answer for you about the European leg.

I'm not talking about that.

I'm talking about Kelly Ann.

She's right in front of you.

Wake up.

Ronnie: This is a song I wrote about the South, and I believe in it.

And it goes something like this.

[soft music playing]


Well, after the Rolling Stones victory, everything was all sweetness and light.

We marched into Tokyo like an unbeatable army, and, my God, it felt good.

We all met down in the bar.

Ronnie wanted some Dom Perignon, but they didn't have it, so he spent an enormous amount of money buying imported Jack Daniel's for the house.

All right, arigato, my friends.

together: Arigato.


Sick.

Now, this was the liftoff.

This was the new chapter.

Your rough-and-tumble John Wayne American image is so famous.

It's kind of an exaggeration.

We got in fights, like any kid would.

Yeah, we did that for a long time.

You know, show me your biggest badass, and I got an appointment with him outside.

But no more.

And we're not kids anymore.

We're 27 and 28.

Does your image make it important for you to be angry at Neil Young?

You're talking about "Sweet Home Alabama."

No, we love Neil Young.

He just sent use some new songs if we want to do 'em.

woman: Why do you perform barefoot?

If I can't feel the fire onstage, I know I failed.

He just don't like shoes.

Ronnie: That's true.

♪ Sweet home Alabama ♪
♪ Where the skies are so blue ♪
♪ Sweet home Alabama... ♪


They k*lled their shows in Tokyo and Osaka.

And on that last night, I could swear that stage was on fire.

Those boys could play like no one else.

There were a raging, rolling machine.

Ain't been nobody like 'em since.

Reg: I just can't get these figures to work.

It's like, with two different band leaders, two different revenue streams going outbound...

...we can't afford another leg, not with these expenses, especially not in Europe.

No amount of cutting is going to work, unless you cut the pie in half.

[laughs]

[sighs] I'm going to bed.

Good work.

I know it wasn't easy.

[exhales deeply]

Good night.

[women moaning]

Harris, what you just did will help the world replenish.

Look, I know it wasn't easy having sex again, even if it was with the most attractive women of the entire human species.

Now... give me Jen.


Rick: Harris, we couldn't find her.

I was just a pawn?

I trusted you.

How foolish.

My silly need to fit in and be accepted.

That's how you lure me in?

But I'm here to serve a bigger, more cynical plan.

Why didn't I see through this?

Because that's how they trick you.

They take an average man and make him feel... beautiful.


I'm a pawn.

Well, last night in Tokyo, the promoter, Mr. Udo, took everybody to a Japanese disco that kind of catered to an English-speaking clientele.

The translation of the name of the disco was, uh...

Was "Casual Mind Universe," whatever the f*ck that's supposed to mean.

Everybody was in a good mood, celebratory, loose.

[indistinct chatter]

[upbeat disco music playing]

♪ ♪


This reminds me of the first time we met.

Meet in all the best places.

How you feeling, Ronnie?

Never better.

Things are going so well, I-I just don't feel comfortable.

I keep waiting for something that's gonna just take it all away.

[laughs]

You know, at least when I was drinking and fighting, I knew where the hurt would come from.

I did it myself.

Damn right.

Now I-I feel so protective, I just want to run away.

But I can't.

I'm Papa Ronnie.

You... you know, I just don't want my baby girl to grow up and read about me like I was some fighting redneck.

Hmm.

I got this voice inside, man.

I-it's just telling me, "Don't wait.

We got to get there."

I can't shake this feeling, Phil.

What do you call it, huh?

Oh, I know what they call it, and I hate it.

both: Growing up.

Let's go get a drink.

Like grown-ups.

Now, growing up is trying to do the right thing.

Problem is, doing the right thing sucks quite a bit of the time.

Ronnie Van Zant said that.

Yeah.

He was my first real hero.

And even heroes got to grow up.

So what is it you wanted to ask me?

[chuckles]

Would you be the godfather of my son?

Phil, that'd be my honor.

You've been holding out on me.

Mr. Udo kept sending over bottles of Dom Perignon to the table.

[indistinct chatter]

A group of German airline pilots appeared at the next table, started to try to figure out who the band was.

[laughter]

American rednecks Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Hey, Americans.

Whoo!

We got recognized.

And then the sh*t hit the fan.

man: Big, strong Southern girls.

We gonna take that sh*t?

Yeah, we're gonna take that.

This ain't Florida.

Hey, Phil, what do you really think about our band?

Well, I've never seen a better band live.

I've never felt more at home than when I'm on your stage.

Sorry, I can't quite hear you, 'cause these assholes are talking so loud.

You're like my other family.

man: Girls are very pretty.

Allen: Hey, y'all better back off.

Oh, they say you are the tough guys from the South who like to fight.

Not no more.

Your girls are so pretty.

Do you screw them?

Phil: This is where I began to get nervous.

Dean leaned over and said...

Phil, let's get out of here.

Where's Mr. Udo?

I don't know. I don't want to leave the table.

If any of you hit anyone, we'll never get you out of the country.

Gary: You know I got a mean left.

What about getting out of the country?

That was the deal getting you in here, that we wouldn't fight.

That's starting to become a problem.

man: Just talk to us.

We like your girls.

Don't be rude.

The boys are busy. Thank you.

They are not boys.

They are big Southern men, big, tough Southern men with girls with pretty titties.

What if he hits me first? Can I hit him?

That's self-defense.

Hey, just leave us alone.

Okay, guys, the band doesn't want to talk right now.

We just played a big show.

Because we are German, you don't like us.

No, not at all.

Oh, we just want to have fun.

Can we please play with her titties?

You shut the f*ck up.

Hey, Ronnie.

Well, we had a plan.

Don't fight.

And it really worked...

Don't fight.

Till it stopped working.

But don't fight.

♪ Oh, it's the Saturday night special ♪

♪ ♪

♪ For $20 you can buy yourself one too ♪

♪ ♪


Were you in the fight too?

I was just trying to keep the peace.

♪ ♪

[panting]

We got to get him out fast.

Well, what do we do?

I'll get Ronnie out the back.

You go out the front and distract the cops.

What if I get arrested?

I'll come take care of it.

By the time they figure everything out, we'll have the whole band out of the country.

Here, put that on.

Don't lose my hat.

Let me look at you.

You look good.

[laughter]

You don't look much like me.

I'll get this back to you.

You keep it.

Now, go be me.

How am I gonna do that?

Follow your instincts.

♪ Here we are, here we are, here we go ♪
♪ Here we go ♪
♪ Rockin' all over the world ♪

See ya on the other side, brother.

Phil: That was the last time I ever saw Ronnie.

Harvey.

[sighs]

What do you know about why I was hired?

What?

You once said that you were loyal.

I need you to be loyal to me right now.

What are you talking about?

Come on, man.

Come on.

Preston wants Tom to go solo.

f*ck.

You didn't hear that from me.

We had to show Tom the numbers that he can make more money without Christopher.

Mm.

So no amount of savings I found would ever have mattered?

Mm-mm.

Preston would have given Tom the same result.

Mm-hmm.

[gentle guitar music]

♪ ♪


I was brought in to break up the brand.

♪ ♪

Well, three days in a Japanese jail will give you some time to think.

They smuggled the real Ronnie out of the country.

I went home after the lawyers did a little do-si-do.

Took a year off to raise my kid.

It was Ronnie's idea.

I could have done both.

I missed that band.

Later that year, they decided to get a private plane that was fairly cheap, a Convair 240.

The third one ever built, had 29,000 flight hours on it.

It was a tired plane.

Aerosmith and Peter Frampton had both looked at it and turned it down.


The band was worried about it.

The plane ran out of gas over a swamp in Mississippi.

Ronnie d*ed instantly, and... so did... Steve Gaines and Cassie Gaines, his sister.

So did their assistant road manager, Dean Kilpatrick, and two others.

It was the first time someone I'd known and loved d*ed.

And I still haven't gotten over it.

'Cause I know in my gut if I'd have been on the plane...

...I might've saved people.

I should've been on that plane.

Allen Collins lived for many more years, and so did Leon Wilkeson, Ron Eckerman, Billy Powell.

Gary Rossington still tours with a version of Lynyrd Skynyrd with Ronnie's little brother Johnny singing lead.

I couldn't listen to their music for 20 years.

But I hear Ronnie's restless spirit talking to me every day.

[Lynyrd Skynyrd's "All I Can Do Is Write About It" playing]

He was the father of that band till the day he d*ed, and when I feel sad about what he might have become, probably the Merle Haggard of his generation, I think about how a man learns to become a father.

♪ But the things they write about us is just a bore... ♪

How do you spend this little dance with destiny?

That's up to you.

But when you find your band, you find your band.

And that was my band, Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Years later, I found another band, and that's this band and this crew, the Staton-House Band.

That's why I came back.

I listen to a voice inside, and if I don't like ya, I tell ya.

And if I love ya, I'll tell ya.

But whatever that voice says, I listen.

And I thank my friend Ronnie Van Zant for that.

♪ Slowly creepin' ♪
♪ Lord, take me and mine ♪
♪ Before that comes ♪


[Wesley and Milo playing gentle guitar music]

♪ ♪

♪ Well, Mama told me ♪
♪ When I was young ♪
♪ Said, "Sit beside me ♪
♪ My only son" ♪
♪ Said, "Listen closely ♪
♪ To what I say ♪
♪ And if you do this ♪
♪ It'll help you some sunny day ♪
♪ Oh, yes, it will" ♪

♪ ♪

♪ "Oh, take your time ♪
♪ Don't live too fast ♪
♪ Troubles will come ♪
♪ And they will pass ♪
♪ You'll find a woman ♪
♪ Yeah, and you'll find love ♪
♪ And don't forget, son" ♪

all: ♪ "There is someone up above" ♪

All right!

♪ "And be a simple ♪
♪ Kind of man ♪
♪ And be something ♪
♪ You love and understand ♪
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