01x07 - Episode 7

[bunniefuu]

[PANTS HEAVILY]

Let's just go to that next tree and then we'll stop.

Got a great tree right here.

Come on, Dan!

Throw another limp on the barbie.

How many more have you got left?

Have I done 'The Limportance of Being Earnest'?

Yes.

Then I have 'Deep Limpact', 'Homer Limpson' and 'New Zealand Aladdin'.

Why?

Because you've got a magic limp.

I said, because you...

Yeah, got it.

You've got a magic limp.

I heard it, I heard it.

Oh, if you don't want babies, Grace is the one who's supposed to take the pill.

They're vitamins.

Hey can I, um, see you in my office for a second?

Okay.

Did you find the pet rat I keep in the food cupboard?

The what?

I'm joking.

But I figure whatever I'm in trouble for will seem less bad now.

You're not in trouble.

Yes!

I've opened some of Mum's mail.

I think she's paying for a lot of the bills out of her retirement savings.

Oh.

That's bad?

Yes.

Worse than opening someone's mail?

Well, we're making a loss, Em.

Ohh.

We're going to have to make some cuts.

Like what?

No!

You're going to fire your own grandmother?

Shh! She's not my grandmother.

But, yes, that's the plan.

♪ Yeah, we know ♪
♪ Even if we had so far to go ♪
♪ Even if the pace is slow ♪
♪ Well, I'll be coming home to you again ♪
♪ If we find ♪
♪ Something to feel that we belong ♪
♪ If we could right all the wrongs ♪
♪ I'll be coming home to you again ♪

Barbara will m*rder you, and not in your sleep.

She'd wake you up to do it.

I don't want to.

We just can't afford to keep her on anymore. Maybe she wants to retire.

Maybe she's just hanging around out of loyalty to Mum.

There must be a better way to save money.

What's this?

Our electricity bill.

Great.

Switch to candles. More romantic.

Water.

We'll drink up when it rains and flushing the toilet is for cowards.

Yeah, Em...

Work with me here.

You don't want to fire your godmother.

She's not my godmother, okay? Or my grandmother.

She's an employee.

Is that how it is?

Look, I've got a meeting with the accountant at one.

If they can find any other way to save money, I'm all ears.

Great. And you and I can brainstorm over lunch.

Well, I was actually going to catch up with Grace.

You went for a run with her this morning.

I know. I mean, you can come if you want.

I want you guys to be friends, and Grace really likes you.

I like her, but you're the one dating her.

It's more important that you like her.

I do. I want you to like her.

I said I like her.

Yeah, and she likes you.

She likes you.

She does?

She should. I like you.

Yeah, and I like... Are you coming to lunch or not?

Why didn't you tell me it was going to be a romantic picnic?

Because it's not. It's just lunch, outside on a blanket.

Oh, yeah, well, that sounds perfectly reasonable then.

Did you only bring two glasses?

Yes. Sorry, that's fine. Uh, Grace and I can share.

After all, we've kissed on the mouth.

I just think you probably want to do that more.

Today. Alone.

No, no, we'll share a glass.

Then you can't do the romantic arm twisty drink thing.

It's just a casual lunch.

Is it? What'd you pack for food?

A piece of spaghetti and a meatball you can push around with your noses?

Salad, actually. Casual salad.

Oh, yeah, this is practically a business meeting.

Hi!

Hi.

Hey, how are you?

Emma, have these.

Me?

Yep.

Patients bring them in, but I get hay fever, so I was going to give them to Daniel.

Now I'm giving them to you.

Maybe they'll look nice in the office or your bedroom.

That is so nice. I'm going to take them there right now.

No, they'll last for hours.

No, sit down.

That was really nice.

This was a great idea, Dan.

Thank you.

How are your legs feeling?

Uh, yeah, good, thanks. Not even sore.

Really? We'll have to go harder tomorrow then.

Uh, well, that... they are...

They're the exact amount of sore they need to be to not go harder tomorrow.

Emma, you should join us on one of our runs.

Oh, I don't run.

Unless I'm in mortal danger, and even then, if it was going to be a quick death, I'd seriously consider it over running.

That's not a joke. I'd rather die than run.

So what do you do for exercise?

Sometimes I dream I'm flying.

Uh, Grace, do you mind if we share a glass?

I only brought two.

Of course not.

We exchange 80 million microbes each time we kiss, so sharing a glass is fine.

Well, here are some more microbes.

Well!

Em, seriously, stay. There's heaps of food.

It's fine. I just think you guys probably want to kiss a lot.

And you should because love is great.

Or liking each other a lot.

Wherever you're at. This is beautiful.

This... You guys, this whole thing, warms my heart.

Have a lovely outside blanket lunch.

I'll meet you at the accountants, Dan. Grace, I'll see you later.

At least take something with you.

What?

Um, I could put some wine in a Tupperware container?

Okay, bye.

How's the lamington?

Oh, I can't. Eating plan.

[DOOR SLAMS]

Danny McCallum!

Daniel.

Uh, hi, Steph.

I didn't expect to see you still in Rosehaven.

Of course! Rosehaven's the best. You living here now?

Thought you'd left us for the mainland.

Uh, yes, I came back to run my Mum's agency.

Couldn't hack it?

Hi, I'm Stephanie.

Emma.

Are you two...?

Oh, just friends.

But he tries it on, constantly.

He got you flowers?

His girlfriend did.

Weird.

How long has it been, Danny? 10 years?

Uh, yeah, probably.

Um...

Do you still like... drawing?

What?

Oh, I just remember you used to draw with, uh, chalk on your driveway.

No, I don't draw with chalk anymore. Do you still read comics?

Yes.

So, I'm assuming you're here because McCallum Real Estate is... [BLOWS LIPS]

What's... what's that?

In the toilet, financially.

Yeah, Stephanie, what happened?

Mum's been running it just fine for 30 years.

Did the market change or something?

No, your Mum did.

I've been trying to get her to sell for months.

Instead she let you take over. [LAUGHS] And that was smart.

Yeah, well, we're not selling, okay? I want to know how to fix it.

Sure, you could... you could sell a house.

I'm working on that.

In the meantime, you need to save some money.

Uh, well, I have actually already thought...

Oh, no, no, he hasn't. What do you suggest?

This.

Easiest thing to get rid of.

No way.

No.

No, no, no, no, no. No. No.

It's fine. They're young. They'll get over it.

Em, McCallum Real Estate has sponsored the Rosehaven Ravens since I was a kid.

Okay, our town is the reason Tasmania has a league now.

We were the first.

Yeah, but you don't appreciate anything when you're young.

You'll see.

It'll be a bunch of depressed teens checking their phones, wishing their parents didn't force them to go outside.

They're hating this.

Sarah! That looks like a blade!

Do you want to warp the disc?

Bruce must be taking over from Greg.

That's good. You can stick it to your old school bully.

That used to be me out there.

Okay, guys!

Can I get your attention, please?

So this is Barbara's son, Danny.

It's Daniel.

He's kidding. He loves being called Danny.

Now, his Mum is the reason you guys are able to practice.

So can we give him a big Rosehaven Raven shout out!

[CAWING]

Perfect.

We heard you were popping over.

I had the kids put together something for your Mum. Timothy!

Thanks, Timothy.

Okay, guys, take five while we have a little bit of a chat.

Not you, Sarah!

Surprised to see you pop by.

I have to say, uh, this is a great thing you're doing for these kids, so... thanks.

Bruce, McCallum Real Estate will no longer sponsor the Rosehaven Ravens.

Take back the card, Timothy!

You did the right thing.

Really?

Because I thought I just made 20 kids cry.

They were faking.

They're kids, Em.

Might as well have given the cup to the Rosstown Ravens.

Hang on, is there a Rosstown Ravens as well as a Rosehaven Ravens?

Yeah, they copied us. Now they'll be the only ones.

Why don't I shout us dinner tonight? You, me, parmas, beer.

I'm actually... having dinner with... Grace tonight.

When are we going to hang out?

We hang out every day at work.

That's not hanging out, that's work.

I know, I'm sorry.

It's just started with Grace and I so it's actually...

I get it. It's new, it's fun.

We're all very excited, but you are allowed to hang out with other people occasionally, for example your best friend, who is now going through a divorce.

Yes, you're right. Um, why don't we book in some time together?

What?

Well... well, you sync the calendars for the office, so why don't you book in some time for us to hang out, then I know not to organise stuff with Grace at the same time.

Book in time? You serious?

Well, it's just a thought.

Okay, I'll make an appointment with your secretary, if you don't fire her first.

I just did that so I don't have to.

Don't have to what?

Nothing.

Anything you want to tell me?

Yesterday I made a cup of soup in a bowl.

I hear you're the owner of the business now. Congratulations.

I got a phone call from Bruce.

Sounds like you're making sponsorship decisions which only the owner can make, so you must be the owner.

Mum, I can explain.

Good, 'cause I'm a bit confused when you took over.

Did I die? I hope not. I just made a casserole.

I've just been trying to look at some ways we can cut back.

You probably want to yell at him in private.

Daniel.

You've been eating into your retirement savings.

That's for me to worry about.

Well, I'm not going to let you keep doing that.

So you thought you'd end a relationship McCallum Real Estate's had with the community for over 25 years?

We can't afford it anymore, okay?

I didn't want to, but I'm not going to let you throw your money away just so some kids can play Frisbee.

That used to be you out there, and it's not your choice to make.

This is pointless.

Emma, can you please talk some sense into him?

You know what, Mum, it is my choice, okay?

I'm not a babysitter, I'm a manager.

Okay? If I make a decision, you have to back it up.

I didn't move my whole life back here just so I could be your assistant.

I had a tough choice to make, I made it, end of discussion.

I got these for you.

I'll just hold them.

[MAN] Stop taking everything I write so literally, okay? I'm sick of it.

Look, I don't have time for this conversation again.

No, you look.

I've brought me own glass and I want me free beer.

Phil, for the last time, it's a joke.

You still have to pay five dollars.

What can I get you, Daniel?

Uh, a pint, please.

If you bring your own glass, it's free.

It's not.

Em.

Daniel.

You're... here.

Yeah. Is that okay? Sorry I don't have an appointment.

It was just a suggestion.

Thank you.

Evening, Emma. Drink?

Heaps. Pint first, please.

If you bring your own...

Shut up, Phil.

Hey is, uh, is Mum okay?

She threw a Kn*fe at a photo of you.

Are you serious?

No. But you really left me hanging in there.

Yeah, sorry.

There you go.

Thank you.

Um, I only booked for two but we can get another chair, or...?

What for?

Oh, I'm not going on your date, you idiot.

Oh, right.

Um, good luck.

Why good luck?

Because it's a date.

Now I'm nervous.

That's normal.

Yeah, but I wasn't nervous before.

Sorry.

Hey.

Hi. Hey.

Hi.

I got your text.

But you probably know that 'cause I'm sitting here, and I replied.

You look great.

Thank you.

You know, you have quite nice eyes, both of them.

That's very kind. I enjoy using them to look at your face.

Oh, no.

What?

We're wearing the same thing.

Nah.

Yeah, blue pants, black top. Goddammit.

Oh, yeah.

That's the best.

Weirdo!

Trendsetters.

So I got a call today from one of my old lecturers.

She was a pretty big mentor to me at uni and I would love the chance to work with her.

Okay.

And there is an opening at her practice she'd like me to apply for.

In Rosehaven?

On the Gold Coast.

Right.

Um...

So what are your plans for when your Mum's back in the office?

Go back to the... go back to the mainland.

The Gold Coast is on the mainland.

Yeah. Uh, yeah, it is.

Danny McCallum.

Daniel.

Hi, Olive.

Do you like watching kids cry?

No.

I think you do.

Bruce said you took a great deal of pleasure clipping the wings of those kids today.

No, that... that's not true. I didn't want to.

I mean, Greg, you know I wouldn't have done it unless I had to.

Yeah, Danny, actually I just came to say hi, but Olive told me to stand behind her and stay quiet, so I thought...

Greg!

I'm sure he thinks he's doing the right thing.

He said she was just an employee. Am I just an employee?

I am worried that the rush of climbing the corporate ladder of rural Tasmania real estate is starting to affect him.

You know, that might be a very real possibility.

He hasn't even got time for me anymore, and I'm all he's got.

Of all the heartless, short-sighted, brutal things...

They can keep playing, we just can't pay for it.

And Doctor Howlett. I'm surprised at the company you're choosing to keep.

This was a really hard decision for him, Olive.

Then why is he out celebrating?

I'm not out celebrating.

And I'm not sure if frisbee's a real sport.

Oh!

So much for McCallum Real Estate being community minded.

My son Timothy hasn't left his room. He said, "What's the point?"

My daughter was throwing plates in the kitchen.

Said it reminded her of being part of something.

Leave him alone, you guys!

Thanks, Em.

If you want to speak to Daniel, you've got to make an appointment.

Thanks.

You're welcome.

[DOORBELL CHIMES]

Mrs Marsh.

Morning, Emma.

Big night?

I always wear sunglasses in the office.

Oh, I must have forgotten that.

What's with all the frisbees?

A present from Bruce. Oh, thanks for backing me up last night.

You're welcome.

No, that was sarcasm.

You didn't back me up. You made things worse.

Well, in my defence, I can't remember.

Daniel, there's some people outside who might want to talk to you.

[CHANTING] Ravens! Ravens! Ravens! Ravens!

[BOOING]

There he is! The chicken who ran out of the pub last night!

I didn't. I walked out, casually, while you made bird noises at me.

We want our frisbees back!

Yeah!

Bruce stuffed them in my office.

Yeah, he made me do it!

Said he couldn't wait to see the look on the kids' faces when the frisbees were gone.

[ALL] Boo!

That's clearly a lie. I'm not a Disney villain.

I heard that he's selling them to Rosstown.

The Rosstown Ravens are scum. I would never do that.

He works for Rosstown!

[ALL] Booo!

Everyone, calm down. That's enough.

Greg?

Oh, yeah, sorry, Danny. Bruce asked me to carry it.

Ravens! Ravens! Ravens! Ravens! Ravens! Ravens!

If I sneak out the back, are there any shops nearby that sell tear gas?

Give them back to them. Tell them I'm reinstating the sponsorship.

It's just frisbee, Daniel. They'll get over it.

No, that partnership has meant getting the business from all those children's parents whenever they've moved.

I was stupid to cancel it.

So you're only sponsoring them because of what you get out of it?

Yes, that's how you run a business.

Fine. We'll find another way to save money.

We already have another way. Look, we don't need Mrs Marsh anymore.

You've taken on most of her duties already.

So it's my fault?

No, I told Mum I'm making the tough choices.

How does it look if I don't follow through with this one and give them back the sponsorship money?

So why don't you fire me as well? That'll save even more money.

Em, stop taking everything so personally, okay?

I've got an employee who doesn't do her work anymore.

I'm letting them go. It's as simple as that.

Fine. Well, I don't want to be here when you do it.

Well, you might as well go home. You're hungover anyway.

Oh, I'm sorry, Mr Perfect.

I must have forgotten to take my five million vitamins that I don't even know what they do.

It's magnesium and it's for muscle recovery.

And if I'm hungover it's because we're supposed to drink together.

I get the sh*ts, you get the chasers. You broke the system.

Goodbye, Mrs Marsh.

Not feeling well, Emma?

Go home. Feel better.

[CHANTING CONTINUES]

Good news, everyone.

McCallum Real Estate will be sponsoring your stupid frisbee games again!

Oh!

Really?

Danny said that?

Yep.

And as an extra bonus, he's going to be f*ring a nice old lady who might have gone to w*r.

Oh, well, we didn't know about that.

No, you didn't. So I hope you enjoy your precious Frisbees.

Careful! They're expensive!

Oh, it's like all anyone cares about is frisbees and money!

And frisbee money!

It's all business!

Frisbee is the heart of this town!

Oi, you've got a pretty good arm!

You should come to practice.

She's gone. She didn't hear me.

Um, Mrs Marsh, can I talk to you, please?

Certainly, Danny.

Did you want a hot chocolate?

Uh, yes. Sorry, no. No, thank you.

Um, Mrs Marsh, you're here full-time, aren't you?

Open till close, six days a week.

And you're busy?

Right. Um, Mrs Marsh, I've been... I've been thinking, uh...

I remember when I taught you piano, you would always do this. Hesitate.

You need to be more confident, Danny.

I actually prefer Daniel now.

That's a good start.

Right.

Mrs Marsh, do you ever get, um, bored working here?

I like it.

You wouldn't rather be at home, um, reading, or...?

I get to do a lot here.

Uh, right.

Well, if you ever did want to leave, you would have my full support.

Not financially, obviously.

Daniel, what are you trying to say?

Mrs Marsh, I have to let you go.

Oh.

I'm so sorry.

[LAUGHS]

"Let go" means "fire", right?

Danny...

I don't get paid.

I'm sorry?

I don't get paid.

I just come in, or I'd be knocking about the house, otherwise.

But I can leave if you want, Daniel.

Oh, no. No, no, no, no.

No, please, uh, stay forever. I'm so sorry.

Thank you for...

Okay. Uh, thank you.

There's the man that's not afraid to make the tough calls.

Mum, I reinstated the sponsorship.

I know.

All right.

Daniel, I'm not an idiot.

I know we're in the red right now, and it's my choice what I do with my retirement money.

Maybe we should listen to Steph.

I don't care what Steph says.

I know I can turn it around once I'm back.

Meantime, I'd appreciate it if you didn't try and fire your godmother.

Oh, she is my godmother.

You overstepped your bounds today.

I'll be back soon and you won't have to worry about it, so stop second guessing me.

Hi.

Hi.

Come in.

Thanks.

Sorry if the place is a mess.

Yeah, it's pretty disgusting in here, Grace.

You okay?

Did you take too much magnesium?

No.

Any vomiting?

No.

Nausea?

No, no.

Sleepiness?

Yes but no.

Uh, no, I wanted...

You know how you mentioned the Gold Coast.

Yeah. But I know you have responsibilities here.

No, I think Mum's actually looking forward to getting rid of me.

What about Emma?

Oh, she's an adult.

I mean, she'll be fine.

I... I want to go with you.

To the... to the Gold Coast?

Anywhere.

But, yes, the Gold Coast.

I'm going to move with Grace to the Gold Coast.

What?

You did a final inspection this morning. How did it look?

[BOTH] Good.

We're going to have to clean the house.

With what? Our hands?

Are we... cool?

Yeah, we're cool.

Oh, Em, grow up!

All I've done is help you!

By showing up at my doorstep and sponging off me?

Come on, Damien.

True or false? An octopus has a beak?

False.

Incorrect. Drink!

On what continent would you not find bees?

Antarctica.

Correct. Drink!