02x10 - Ken's Apology

[bunniefuu]

Molly. I found boy for you.

What? Why?

At the Korean barber.

I go twice a week for trim upstairs and downstairs.

Hair and mustache.

Longest second of my life.

His name is Jae. He's my barber's grandson.

He's perfect for you.

He's Korean and a boy.

Oh. Thanks, but I'm good for now.

I really want to start college single.

So you can study a lot and have no distractions?

Yeah!

He also has bad-boy vibe.

Very sexy!

Grandpa, I don't think you get it.

She wants to focus on her studies.

I don't know how I feel about your dad setting Molly up.

Eh, It's a Korean thing. He used to set me up.

It was a Dumpster fire every time.

That's how I knew you were the one.

When am I gonna know you're the one?

I'm glad your dad feels at home here, but he needs to ask before he just does things.

He's been digging a hole in the backyard for a week and won't tell anyone why.

And, despite what our grocery list clearly states, he buys crunchy instead of creamy peanut butter.

I hate crunchy. You can't spread it.

Fine. I won't tell anyone.

I almost forgot... I bought you some new jeans.

Boot cut is out.

I know. She's stuck in the '90s.

Say hi to Smash Mouth for me.

Okay, well, I'm headed to the wellness seminar.

Call me after and let me know how it went.

How what went?

Tell me you didn't forget.

I didn't forget.

What didn't I forget?

Dave's parent/teacher conference.

You promised you'd cover it.

I would if I could, but I'm draining Mr. Jacobs' knee.

It's his daughter's wedding this weekend, and he can't do the "Achy Breaky Heart" on crutches.

I mean, I could, but I'm an exceptional dancer.

How does that work its way into every conversation?

I don't know, Allison. I guess I'm just that good.

I can go to Dave's conference.

No. No.

Th-That's very nice, but it's a parent/teacher conference.

I'm a parent.

[Gasps] Good point, Papa.

I'll leave you to discuss.

I...

My dad can handle it.

I mean, he went to all my parent/teacher conferences, and Dave's are just about how great he is.

Pretty different than mine.

"Ken doesn't sit still. He talks too much.

But, man, is he an exceptional dancer."

Fine!

Dad, you're in.

That's why I get mustache trimmed twice a week.

You never know.

Just get the facts, okay?

A-And try to smile.

I smile all the time.

I'm smiling right now.

Great.

Oh. And can you also pick up some creamy peanut butter?

Creamy peanut butter is a rip-off!

Where's the nuts?!

Okay, I love you guys, too. Bye.

[Telephone rings]

Chello?

Oh, hi, Dr. Yee.

Mm-hmm. I did see Mr. Hubert's bloodwork.

It seemed fine. I called him.

No, I didn't know Mr. Hubert had a history of prostate cancer.

It wasn't in his file. I didn't...

Excuse me?

You're accusing me of making a mistake?

Whoa! Dr. Park doesn't make mistakes, son, so you must have the wrong number.

Yes, obviously, it's the right number. I answered it.

That was just a colorful way of making my point.

Well, you must be a very proud grandpa.

[Chuckles]

Dave's so bright and engaged.

I've been teaching a long time, and you don't come across many Dave Parks.

Oh, and his smile... I love his smile.

[Chuckles]

Smiling is overvalued by Americans.

Well, okay. Maybe. [Chuckles]

But he has a good one. [Chuckles]

And Dave's easily getting straight A's, so no complaints here.

Well, complaints here.

E-Excuse me?

This work is nonsense.

He's not feeling challenged.

Well, I'm certainly feeling challenged in this moment.

No student should get straight A's so easy and smile all the time.

I promise I create a-a challenging environment.

Me too!

And what is the capital of Peru?

Lima!

Right again, Dave.

Great job.

And who knows the capital of Argentina?

That's it?

No, no, no, no. That's too easy.

Make Dave list all of Peru's bordering countries and major exports... in Spanish.

Mr. Park [chuckles] as we discussed, the school allows silent observers in class.

So when the hand goes up, the mouth goes...

That may work with these sheep, but it's not gonna work on me.

Dave know this stuff already.

But the other students don't.

That's their problem!

When they grow up, they'll be working for him!

Okay, thanks, Grandpa.

By the way, the capital of Argentina is Buenos Aires.

Guess we're past that.

I can't believe that weasel-faced urologist... calling me at home, accusing me of making a mistake.

Wait. I thought you never met him before.

I haven't, but I could tell he has a weasel face over the phone.

That's how powerful it is.

I obviously didn't know Mr. Hubert had a history of prostate cancer, or I would have known his PSA should have been zero before it was sent to the urologist for review.

Right?

It's like "urine" [You're in] the wrong, Weasel Face!

[Both laugh]

To be clear, I'm only laughing because it supports my point.

So, Dave's principal called.

There was a fight at school.

Get it, Dave!

It wasn't Dave. It was Ken's dad.

Get it, Ken's dad!

He caused a disturbance, demeaned children, and said he'd stop when he was dead.

Ha! Classic Papa.

This is why I didn't want him going to Dave's conference.

You have to talk to him tonight and tell him how out-of-line he was.

I will totally do that and not sit in the driveway until I think you've already done it.

Ha! Here it is.

Mr. Hubert's medical intake form.

Zoink!

This will vindicate me. [Chuckles]

Right under "medical history," it says...

"prostate cancer."

Damn it!

Aw, man.

Ken, it's okay.

Luckily, Mr. Hubert has no symptoms and is being followed up with appropriate treatment by Dr. Yee.

But he was my patient.

Okay, just get ahold of I.T.

We got to make sure oversights like this never happen again.

Will do. Right away.

Hey.

Hey!

Everybody makes mistakes.

Hmm? No. Impossible.

There are no mistakes at Welltopia... just acts of God we could never legally anticipate.

Well, I made a mistake, and not a small one.

Call Mr. Hubert. I want to apologize.

Whoa! Whoa.

There are no apologies at Welltopia.

No, an apology is an admission of fault.

Mr. Hubert? Please hold.

I got him on the line.

I got this.

Hello. This is Pat Hein.

I'm the supervisor here at Welltopia, and I just want to say from the bottom of my heart, I understand that you were dealt a bad hand, but all's well that ends well.

Okay, then. You have a good day.

"All's well that ends well"?

Yes, Ken.

That's what we at Welltopia call a statement of non-apology.

It pacifies the patient without admitting legal fault.

You're welcome to say things like "I regret your misfortune" or "Ooh! Tough stuff, buddy."

This is ridiculous, Pat. Mr. Hubert could have d*ed.

Bup, bup!

No one dies at Welltopia.

They just become inactive patients.

Oh. Hello.

Mm.

Anything you want to tell me about Dave's conference today?

I smiled the whole time.

Bad advice. Did not go over well.

Are you sure it was the smiling that didn't go over well, or could it have been you insisting everyone at school was bad at their jobs?

Seems like the smiling thing.

Come on! Don't you think Dave should be challenged more?

Maybe he could be, but I'm not sure calling Miss Flanagan a glorified babysitter is the way to get there.

I never said "glorified."

Great. You're home.

Why don't the two of you have a chat, while I call everyone on Dave's class phone tree and tell them they're not sheep?

But they are!

Dad, what were you thinking?

I was just trying to help.

Even if you're trying to help, Park men aren't always the perfect gods we believe ourselves to be.

Sometimes we make mistakes.

Sometimes they're big mistakes we really should have caught.

I really think it was the smiling thing.

Well, talked to my dad.

How'd it go?

Excellent.

He was quick to see the error of his ways and pledged to do better.

Really?

No. He's my dad.

What's wrong with you?

[Sighs]

I did something wrong.

I really want to apologize, but... I can't do it.

Ken, it's okay.

Next time, just don't forget about the conference.

Oh, no, it's not about that.

That was totally on you for not reminding me.

It's about a patient.

I missed an abnormal PSA.

Oh, Ken. Really?

It was right there in his chart.

I never make mistakes like this.

[Sighs]

I know it's hard, but you're gonna get through this.

I'm so sorry.

How's the patient doing?

He's asymptomatic. He's getting treatment tomorrow.

Well, that's a relief.

No symptoms? Sounds like he's gonna be fine.

Yeah. You're right.

[Scoffs]

Maybe I'm just blowing it out of proportion.

You're being sued.

Mr. Hubert's suing me?! I'm being sued?!

I'm just gonna close this.

This is why we don't apologize for mistakes we never made.

Or maybe he never would have sued at all if I had apologized.

Yes! Preach!

Or he would have sued anyway, and you'd be on record admitting fault.

Yes! Preach!

Sorry. I'm... I'm so easily swayed.

Ken, just lay low, all right?

Thanks to your nagging, the new system's already in place, and the problem's been solved.

Just let the lawyers handle it.

Those sick bastards love this sort of thing.

But this doesn't seem right.

I'm sorry, Ken.

Let me rephrase that.

Ooh. Tough stuff, buddy.

But it's company policy.

I get it. I'm a Welltopia employee.

But I'm a doctor first.

Find Mr. Hubert.

Yes! Preach!

He won me back.

What's going on? I had to cancel a session to come down here.

I figured out a way to fix everything.

Sixth grade's too easy. Dave could move to seventh grade.

They just need your signature.

What?! No! I don't want him skipping a year.

But Dave is so excited.

You already told him?

Here, kid. I won't be needing this where I'm going.

Mommy, did you hear?

I got promoted to seventh grade!

Which is perfect, because in seventh grade, you can take robotics, and as the club motto goes, "The best way to make friends is to build them."

I'm sorry, Dave. You're not moving up a grade.

But Grandpa said I...

Grandpa doesn't get to decide.

Why?! Why?!

Because I'm your parent.

I get to decide what grade you're in and what consistency your peanut butter is.

Whatever.

Great job, Mommy!

Sorry for the up-and-back.

Clark.

Yeah.

You seen Dr. Park?

Yeah, I have seen Ken... a bunch.

That's pretty vague for someone charged with knowing his whereabouts.

Damona.

Huh?

Have you seen Ken?

Yeah.

I mean, he's skinny, so, you know, he's very easy to miss, but, yeah, I've seen him.

Uh... [Coughs] Computer. [Coughs]

Are you trying to hide something on your computer?

Um...

Uh... No, I was...

No, he's, um, he's looking at p*rn.

p*rn... yeah. p*rn... Yes.

Nasty stuff.

It is.

This is really... It's pretty bad.

Pat: Oh, yeah.

It's that bowling-themed p*rn.

Starring our patient Mr. Hubert and his bowling league that apparently meets tonight at Pins N' Things in Long Beach.

Yeah, I like it when there's a story.

[Pins crash]

Ken!

Ken, Ken, Ken, Ken, Ken, Ken, Ken!

What are you guys doing here?

Pat knows you're here.

We tried to call you, but he's on his way.

And his eye was doing that twitching thing, so he means business.

Or he just has to pee. One of the two.

Okay. Then it's now or never.

Excuse me. Mr. Hubert?

Dr. Park. What are you doing here?

Looking for you.

How'd you find me?

Oh, I Facebook-stalked you and saw that your bowling league met tonight.

And, uh, happy belated birthday.

Thank you!

Aren't you his nurse?

And friend.

And you're his friend, too?

No. I just drove all the way down to Long Beach to bowl.

Look, my lawyer told me not to talk to anybody from Welltopia, so...

Okay, look, Mr. Hubert, I came here to say I'm s...

An idiot.

I mean, as a man.

As a doctor, he's legally beyond reproach.

Walk with me, dummy.

Ken, you cannot do this.

You cannot apologize to that patient.

I have to. He deserves better...

Ken, listen to me.

If you apologize to him, you will lose your job.

Then you will not be able to give any care to any patient.

Now, who's that gonna help?

I knew that twitch meant business.

Be scared, little man.

Yeah, but go with your heart, big man.

I don't know. I'm just trying to build him up.

I don't know what you're all doing here, but you're making me uncomfortable, so either you leave or I'm gone.

But, Don, we've got nachos coming.

W-We're leaving.

Come on, Ken.

Fine.

All right.

What the hell?!

That was a mistake.

No crap! That was a full beer!

What kind of doctor is this?

I'm the kind of doctor who doesn't knock beers out of people's hands.

You just did. We all saw it.

When I do knock a beer out of someone's hand, that person deserves an apology.

I'm sorry I knocked the beer out of your hand.

It's just a beer.

Stay with me here.

The beer results...

They were normal for normal beer drinkers, but you're not a normal beer drinker.

I should have caught it.

[All] Ohhh.

I should have apologized to you, but I work for a giant corporation, and they have strict rules for this sort of thing.

But I'm not some doctor who makes a mistake and doesn't think about it afterwards.

I'm a doctor who makes a mistake and is never the same again, because the cost isn't just some patient.

The cost is you.

I'm really sorry I let you down, but we've already implemented a system to ensure this will never happen to you or anyone else.

Thanks for apologizing.

It means a lot to me.

Well, that's why it's our policy.

Look, I'm just relieved you're okay.

You know?

Uh, Don, you want Mike to roll for you?

Tell him "Yes."

Molly. I have Jae's number for you.

Maybe you can call him right now.

Oh. Um... I'll do that later.

Oh.

When you have more privacy to flirt and giggle?

Oh! Nice jeans, Mom.

Those new?

Look, I'm sorry I snapped at you at the school.

Dave should be in seventh grade.

I had Ken skip a grade so he was challenged.

And it wasn't good for him.

He was the smallest kid in elementary school, high school, college... even medical school, come to think of it.

But Ken's a doctor.

Yes, he's brilliant and successful, but a lot of times, he felt like an outsider.

I just don't want the same for Dave.

I was very nervous for Ken.

He didn't lose his virginity until med school.

That's younger than I would have guessed.

But being challenged is important.

It is.

But you need to trust us to figure out how to do that.

I'm a great mom, and Ken is a... good dad.

He learned from one of the best.

Next time, let's just talk about this stuff first.

I just want to be able to help around here, earn my keep.

Don't worry.

We'll find a way to get the most we can out of you.

Okay.

So... what's up with the hole in the backyard?

Are you planting a tree?

[Laughs]

Uh, sure.

Molly, there's a Jae here to see you...

Korean, bad-boy vibe.

[Scoffs] The guy Grandpa's trying to set me up with?

He's here?

I'll get rid of him.

Hi.

Oh. Hi.

I'm Molly.

I'm Jae, your Korean setup.

And no pressure, but our grandfathers are outside with a minister and a deejay.

[Laughs]

[Chuckles]

All right, pal, move it along.

Dave. Why don't you go upstairs?

Okay.

But you're wasting your time, K-Pop.

She wants to focus on her studies.

So, other than being Korean and a boy, what else are you about?

Well, that's most of it.

But I-I want to hear about you.

Uh, your grandfather said you want to be a doctor?

[Laughs] Yeah. That's not true.

Hey.

Where have you been?

I drove all the way to Long Beach to apologize to that patient.

You made that kind of effort to apologize to someone?

Spare me the lie and just tell me you're having an affair.

So, he's okay?

More than okay. He bowled a 240.

And the legal department just e-mailed me.

They already dropped the lawsuit.

That's amazing!

[Laughing] Oh!

I'm really proud of you.

Thanks.

And while I'm on my apology tour, I'm sorry I forgot about Dave's conference.

I don't always listen to you, and sometimes that just means me missing the backstory as to why you always cry at car washes, but... sometimes there are worse consequences.

Look, I know your dad's just trying to help out around here, and I realize I could use that to my advantage.

He's gonna help Dave build a robot after school.

Your dad was an engineer, and it's a good way to challenge Dave.

See? That was long, and there were some really boring parts, but I listened to the whole thing.

I really am sorry.

Wow. I'm getting so good at this.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Well, now I guess I can drop my emotional lawsuit.

Mm. You sure you want to do that?

Because you're going to be awarded some pretty delicious damages.

[Gasps] Creamy peanut butter!

[Laughs] It's for my girlfriend, but she won't mind.

[Laughs]

Ohh!

[Laughs]