06x06 - Lactose Intolerant

[bunniefuu]

six six Lactose Intolerant

"Oompa Loompa"

Are you sure this is appropriate?

Don't children get k*lled?

No, they got punished, Bette.

And it was Max's favourite story.

Where are the Willy Wonka bars that you promised?

I wouldn't have made 'em if you'd told me that it was her idea.

What do you want me to do about it?

What I want you to do?

I want you to dump her.

It's not that easy, Alice.

Excuse me?

How do you know Max?

Oh, I haven't met him yet.

I invited her.

I hope you don't have a problem with that.

Max won't care.

She's helping me with my enduring test on Monday.

The ice cream cone needs to go exactly in the corner.

I want to get back in the bed.

I tell you what.

We go in, we have a quick drink, we say, "Hey, baby shower".

Hi the baby shower.

And then we leave.

Okay, you promise?

Welcome.

Wow!

Oh my gosh...

Yes, I've done such a good job.

That's quite magical.

You did.

You did a great job.

Big parties are all the rage.

That's lovely.

Thank you.

You guys look really happy together.

Thank you.

I'm very happy for you both.

So am I.

Me too.

I'm really, really, really happy for you both.

I'm gonna get you a drink.

I wanna give you a big hug, Missy.

Come here.

You...

You passed the test with flying colors.

I'm so happy for you.

We were watching you when we saw how at Hit you rebuffed Nikki Stevens even though she could have helped your career, and it was just so incredible.

It was very, very impressive.

What do you...

What do you mean you saw...

what does she mean she saw?

Saw what?

That I passed the test.

When we were watching her with Nikki Stevens on the big monitors at Hit.

Everone was watching me when I had my meeting with Nikki Stevens?

No, I mean...

well, that's not exactly how it happened.

It was...

No, there is, there is no need to lie.

I will fix this.

When one begins a relationship, you must start with a clean slate and be completely honest.

Which is what we're doing now.

You'd just better...

Nikki Stevens was a test?

No, no, that...

Dylan, that's not exactly what happened.

Do you know what?

It wasn't really, it wasn't even my idea.

I'm gonna f*cking k*ll you, girlfriend!

Surprise!

Happy baby shower day.

Baby shower day!

Okay, here is your golden ticket.

And here is your hat.

And here is a balloon.

Would you like some milk and cookies?

I'm Jamie.

It's nice to meet you, Max.

Hi, I heard so much about you.

She's the only non-friend here.

She's just so inappropriate.

She's gone!

Sorry.

Oh my God!

I don't know what to do.

Helena, I'm so sorry.

I truely am.

Call her.

Try to call her.

Call her?

Okay, I'm calling.

Okay?

Try to call her.

Hi, how are you doing?

I tell you, welcome co-worker with Alice.

I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to talk to you.

Oh, no, we had a great time.

I cannot believe Jenny said that.

What can't you believe?

Whe should just grap Shane and make a run for it.

Maybe she didn't mean for it to be so malicious.

Oh, yeah, no, no, no, Jenny's not malicious.

No, not at all.

Just completely and totally evil.

Okay, fine, she's malicious.

Oh no, I was sure that I had it right.

But I think that...

Look, mine is just as short.

So I already lose.

Ours is shorter too.

Yeah, ours is shorter.

Yeah, yes, it is.

Okay, you're next.

I'm sorry, Max.

Come on.

Alright.

Yeah!

Everyone, Shane is the winner.

I wonder what she won.

So, I think it's time for another game.

Do any of you guys have any suggestions?

Chocolate in a diaper!

Oh my godness, you're right!

That's exactly what the other game was!

You have to guess what kind of chocolate the sh*t is.

It's so disgusting!

It's gross!

I want...

What is this?

Is this we need the chocolate bars that you made?

Again with this.

Fast and out.

Why are you putting your nose so close to it?

It's a Skor bar!

You're right, Tina.

You know your sh*t, so to speak.

Thank you.

Good job, babe.

Good.

She always wins this, at every shower...

Thank you.

Would you like it, Miss Crankypants?

f*ck off, Jenny!

Hey, do you know what you're having?

No, not yet.

You didn't see anything?

You didn't wanna...?

You don't wanna know?

I guess if Tom were here, it'd maybe be easier.

Well f*ck, Tom!

I'd be more ready for this.

Yeah, you know what, Max?

I'm sorry, but, what an assh*le.

Yeah, such an assh*le.

He's not an assh*le.

He's just scared.

Have you spoken to him?

He changed both his numbers.

Oh, that's horrible.

What an assh*le!

Seriously.

It's so wrong.

And you know what, Max?

Don't be scared, really.

I mean, don't.

I mean, when the baby is born and you hold that baby in your arms, you're gonna know exactly what to do, I promise you.

It's finally cool to hang out with you.

Alice talks about you a lot.

Really?

It's nice to hear.

She keeps get over me these days.

Oh yeah, well, she's a little mad at your girlfriend, so I guess she probably hates you too.

You're being serious?

No, I'm just kidding.

She thinks of you as a really good friend.

She, like, she admires you and...

That's sweet.

I'm glad to hear that.

I mean, it's nice to hear this, I even, it's uh...

Thank you.

That's actually really sweet compliment.

Do you want more?

That's really good.

I know.

I hadn't smoke that in a long time.

Do you want more?

Maybe one more hit.

Sorry.

I just, uh, I just wanted to tell you that it's your turn for the game.

So...

and also, that, I don't mean to be like a narc, but the...

the pot is just drifting and Max is getting...

Okay.

I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go play the game.

Why did you do that?

Do what?

What "do what"?

I was talking to her!

Oh, come on, you were flirting with her.

Maybe, I was.

Yeah, so what if you were, I don't care.

Really?

I swear like you were giving me a weird look over there though.

'Cause I was just coming to tell you that it was your turn.

I'm not kidding!

Guess what?

What?

I got you a present.

I made something for you.

What is it?

I can't tell you.

When am I gonna find out?

Let's play the game.

Why are you...

what's wrong?

Oh they're everywhere these days.

'Cause I love you.

I love you too.

And that person would be?

It would, well...

It's present-cake time, mom-dad.

Self sufficient, I guess.

Hey be careful tonight, please.

And don't destroy anything.

Oh, look at the cake.

Look at that cake.

It's cake time!

Oh, Kit, I'm so sorry.

Oh, no, it's okay.

Happy baby, Max!

Wow, it's really big.

Do you wanna cut the cake?

I'm not so good at it.

Maybe, you wanna...

I can cut it.

Would you mind?

Here's Kit's present.

Yeah, open the present.

Thanks.

Yeah, it's right.

Did you take...

do you have it?

It's right here.

Don't worry.

You have to hold it up, Max, so we can all see what it is.

It's a little baby tee-shirt.

Those are actually called onesies.

Oh my god, it's like Jenny!

Thanks.

Oh look, there's a little punk rock baby.

Oh, there it is.

And here is our present.

That's fancy.

Tada!

It's so amazing!

A stroller...

But you see, it's more than a stroller.

You can just take this little part up and it's a car seat.

And if you take little handle, it's also a craddle.

You can turn it this way so you can drink a coffee from here, eat your babas.

Does it do the dishes?

No, just your taxes.

And then there's two little things here, you can have your coffee and a bottle...

There's also instructions down here.

It's really liked.

It also comes with a DVD.

It's about an hour long, so, if you have any questions.

Bette has read the instruction manual from cover to cover.

You think?

So, any questions?

It's really safe.

Thanks.

I appreciate it.

You're gonna need it.

I guess I'm gonna need a stroller, huh?

Whose are you opening next?

Max, do you have a birth plan?

Time for presents.

No, not yet.

Oh my God!

Our birth plan?

It went right out of the window.

I mean, I was to do a homebirth, in a tub, with a midwife, and we ended up in an emergency room, having a C-section.

Open the present.

But I still, I think it's good to have a plan.

No, you should have a plan.

I don't blame 'em when they have a C-section, because either, you know, you get all torn...

Open it.

... or you have an episiotomy.

What's that?

It's when the baby's head is too big to go through the vag*na and they have to...

cut it.

Just cut it with scissors.

Oh, you guys!

But the...

it's just the perineum and...

Really?

they numb it.

Open the present.

It's better to actually have episiotomy than to have it ripped because...

It's really gross.

... when it's ripped, it's like crocked.

Gross to talk about.

Open the present.

If they cut it, it's just like...

Open the present!

Can we just look at sweet baby clothing stuff?

What is this?

Hey, it's a present in your lap.

Look at that.

Open up!

Oh, that's your present?

Both from Jenny-Shane?

No.

I didn't know it.

What's in here?

What is this?

That's a, it's a breastpump, so.

Wow!

That's a nice one.

Can I just show you?

You, you attach it to your breast, and, while you're lactating, and then you, the milk goes in here and you can feed the baby in milk.

No, I'm not gonna...

you know, I'm not gonna do breastfeeding.

You do wanna breastfeed, you do.

I mean, it's what's best for the baby.

All the doctors say so, and it's a wonderful bonding experience.

I had such a good time with Angie.

You know what?

I get, I understand that you identify as a man, but I think it's important as a parent that you can't be selfish for the child.

She's been...

she's given life lessons now.

It's my own f*cking choice for the breastfeed.

Jenny, what do you know about any of this?

Bringing up kids, family?

What do you know about that?

It's time for, you know...

I'll make a speech.

Big day, huh?

Listen.

You, mister, have had the unusual benefit of knowing what both sexes go through and how they love in all those kinds of things and because of that, you are gonna be a very caring and very fantastic father, okay?

Don't you?

In this world, Max, it can be harsh, we know.

You know more than any of us about that.

But that's, that's giving you knowledge, you know, and knowledge is gonna give you strength and you know, strength is gonna be something you can import to your child, you know?

It's gonna help the two of you on this journey that you're gonna make together!

Sure, it's great to have two parents, like, hello!

These two.

Exhibit A!

Two adorable parents, but, listen to this, Max.

You, being alone, is better because you don't have to go through all that bullshit, you know?

Like, Of like figuring it all out with someone else like, "Let's circumcise" or "No, we can't circumcise" or...

"Let them stay up late!", "I want them to go to bed", you know, it's like, much better if it's just you.

You and the kid, huh?

What is she doing?

Doing what she always does.

Watch her.

She's on a roll.

You don't have to do that.

It's all you.

So, Max listen, to you.

Everybody, cheers.

This is amazing like bringing a life into this world.

And I can only hope, really, that this child, you know, will turn out to be someone who has values.

Who knows the real meaning of honesty, the real meaning of trust and real friendship, you know?

Someone who will stand up to their girlfriend when they know she's wrong.

I can hope, we can all only hope that this child will not grow up to be a thief, someone who would steal people's ideas and lives and things like that.

So I pray, Max, for your child, that they won't grow up being malicious and manipulative and f*cked up.

Yeah!

Good thing!

That's what I'm saying to Max!

To Max.

This is just big and, again, it's your... are you okay?

I think...

Oh, he's gonna throw up.

Is she throwing up?

You're okay?

She's gonna throw up!

Oh my God!

I don't think I can do this, okay?

I have to ask you something.

Do you think that maybe you could adopt my kid?

Max, you don't know what you're saying.

And you know what?

You're just such good parents.

We're already adopting another baby.

I know, but...

It's already done.

You guys, I think he's having a panic att*ck.

Listen, I have some extra Diasopam in here.

Give her air!

Air!

Xanax.

I can't breathe.

In our room.

Okay, I can't breathe.

Just breathe slow.

It's in our bedroom.

It's okay, it's gonna be alright.

Would you get the Lexapro?

It's in...

where is my purse?

Where is your purse?

Go get the valium in the bathroom.

Oh my... somebody can call ?

Can .

I can't do this.

I'm scared.

I have some Lexapro in my purse.

Where is my purse?

Okay, people!

People, she's pregnant.

You can't give a pregnant lady dr*gs.

He.

He is pregnant.

"He", okay.

He is pregnant, okay?

He is pregnant.

I'm sorry.

Okay, he's pregnant.

She didn't... just... I'm sorry.

I think we should get on the phone with .

That's crazy, I can't breathe.

I don't wanna do this!

So, the birthmother knows you're lesbians.

Yes, we were very clear with Marcy.

She's totally comfortable.

Except for her stepfather and her mother.

Doesn't matter what they think.

They have no rights here.

I just need to make sure that Marcy's committed to seeing this through.

Well, she assured us that we were her choice.

And she really doesn't like the other potential adoptive parents.

Excellent.

Sounds like you're in good shape.

I look forward to welcoming a new addition to the Porter-Kennard family.

So, you heard the good news, right?

Phyllis accepted.

Congratulations.

Damn!

We haven't set a date yet.

We're waiting on Gavin's availability.

Gavin Newsom, mayor of San Fransisco.

He's officiating.

Great!

Well, a mayor.

Well, I think we have one more trip to Nevada, right?

And that's just to take Marci to the doctor's office, but other than that, it's very routine.

She's from Nevada?

Why?

Well, Nevada's problematic.

It's one of the few states that doesn't allow gay couples to adopt.

Wait, but Marcy chose us.

Doesn't matter.

The state won't allow it.

This is crazy.

There has to be something we can do.

You can adopt as a single parent.

What does that mean?

At the hospital in Nevada one of you presents as a single parent and adopts the child.

And once you're back in California, we do the second on adoption, just like you did with Angelica.

Fine.

No!

Let's do it!

Come on.

No, there's no way.

We can't start this whole thing out with a lie.

We cannot lie about who we are, escpecially when it comes to our family.

We can't do that to Angelica.

Or to our potentially new son.

We just can't.

You're right, you're right.

Thought you might take that position.

There is one other thing that you can do, but I can't imagine you'd want to.

What is it?

You can have the birthmother come live with you in Los Angeles.

Arrange for her to have the baby here.

If she gives birth in California, then Nevada law has no juridiction.

You're both so sweat.

You k*lled me.

Guys, I'm never ever ever doing that again.

It was fun.

You know who's gonna be really sore tomorrow and actually next days?

I'm dead now.

I'm sore now.

The quads, your quads are gonna be k*lling you.

It was good though.

My quads...

Those stairs...

Oh please, what the hell are you so tired for?

You did like two jumping jacks.

Don't start with me when I did the whole thing!

Oh really?

I took a couple of breaks.

A couple as in many many ten?

You did great.

I was surprised.

Really?

You did like of those.

You're actually really good.

You could have easily made the squad.

Seriously.

Oh God, no, I'm so out of shape.

What?!

Are you on cr*ck?

Oh my God!

Really?

Look at you.

Yeah, you're really out of shape.

Shut up!

Oh sure, you're out of shape.

Okay, guys, I'm gonna go home, and take a shower and I'll meet you at the restaurant.

Oh my God, no!

That would take forever.

Why don't you just shower here?

Yeah, but I don't have any clothes and I'm all sore, I'm really.

I could give you something to wear.

I mean, we're like the same size, right?

But, I mean, you're a little smaller.

No, we're about the same size.

Yes, you are.

But I have something that will fit you, I'm sure.

You're sure?

Yeah.

Remember where it is?

Sorry.

I think theses are, these will fit.

Yeah, these are perfect.

Thanks.

Okay, sorry.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

What?

But she's in the other room...

Shh.

Are you serious right now?

That feels really good.

You're sure you wanna f*cking doing it?

Shut up!

She's finished.

I'm gonna...

No!

Dont stop, my God, don't stop!

Not yet.

Oh my God!

f*ck!

That was crazy.

That was a really nice shower.

Hey, are you done?

Yeah.

It's all yours.

I'm gonna jump in.

Great.

Was it good?

Yeah.

Great.

I think I'm gonna go shower with her.

Cool?

Oh, yeah, go for it.

Go, I'll arrange myself.

Alright.

Awesome.

Well, Marcy seems pretty up for it.

Yeah, but you know, who's gonna take care of her kids?

I just...

that's strange to me.

I think they're gonna stay with her parents, right?

You know what I'm worried about?

I'm worried about the car.

Will she need a car?

I don't know.

Will we have to drive her everywhere?

That's hard.

Well, I don't have the time to drive her everywhere.

Do you have the time?

What if the house isn't done?

Weezzie, how are we coming?

Good news, ladies.

We're only three months behind schedule.

Just a little contractor humour there.

Actually we're ahead of the game, ladies.

I guess my guys do more than just look good, huh?

Actually I just wanted to give you the heads-up that, that we're expecting a houseguest for about a month or so.

So what is it critical here?

So am I gonna have to do some massaging of the boys so I don't get to pull them some extra hours?

I just want the perks of the job, I guess.

Can I, uh, Weezzie?

Actually I wanted to talk to you about the master bath.

There was supposed to be a wrap around deck.

Oh yeah, changed that.

That's not gonna happen.

But don't worry, I talk to the architect.

He's a handsome fellow, huh?

I wouldn't kick him out of bed for leaving crumps, huh?

Okay, I am so confused.

Are you confused?

Oh, I'm very confused.

She's a d*ke, right?

I don't know.

She doesn't know she's a d*ke.

That's because she's a yikes!

Yikes!

He's...

He's an handsome fellow.

sh*t!

That's mean.

That's mean.

That's crazy!

She's doing a good job.

She's awesome.

Alright.

This, what is it?

Is the surprise, Oh really?

that I was telling you about.

Yep!

This is your own photography studio.

Catch your keys.

You don't have to share them with anybody.

Look at this, here.

Look, look, natural light, you get all natural light.

This, here, is your seamless for when you wanna do your beautiful portraiture.

And look at this, white walls.

Look, white space, white space.

You know what that's for?

That's when you wanna have your own photography show so you never have to ask anybody for a favor ever again.

These are your tripods, right here.

These are you strobes, right here.

This is your uh, your bats for when you wanna do the fashion photography.

And this is the dark room.

What do you think?

Is, I don't know, is this gonna be okay?

I don't deserve this.

I don't deserve any of this.

Yeah, you do.

No, I don't.

Yes, you do.

I haven't even been taking that many pictures, Jen.

Well you should, 'cause you're talented.

I just think that you should have your own space so you can work.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Hey, T., your car is here.

I'm coming.

I just... doesn't it look crazy?

To have Marcy come here?

I mean, it's exciting, but it's...

You know what?

We're doing the right thing.

I'm gonna stay with Weezzie and make sure that the room is ready.

Alright?

I call you from the gallery tomorrow.

Okay, I just...

I just what?

It's a crazy time, you know.

You have to go.

Don't worry about missing the opening.

There'll be many many more.

I know.

It's just never gonna be a first.

You know what?

You just go to New York and get this new movie off the ground.

Alright?

That's your job.

Kiss Angie for me.

Every night.

I love you.

I love you.

Don't forget.

You're okay?

Jesus!

What are you still doing here?

You're putting pressure on me, woman.

I'm not gonna let you down.

Oh, thanks.

Is you sister going to New York?

My sister Kit?

I thought her name was Tina.

Tina's not my sister.

Tina's my partner.

She's Angelica's other mother.

Yeah, I get that you're partners.

I just thought that you were sisters.

Is she a Wentworth?

What?

No, she's a Kennard.

Then why does she go to New York?

Isn't she gonna be at your opening tomorrow?

So I won't see her, then.

Are you going to the opening?

I'm pumped.

I hear the art openings are a great place to meet the fellows.

And I am looking.

I'll see you tomorrow.

See you tomorrow.

I'm just confused.

Hey, what you're doing?

Oh, you know.

Yes, yes, I see.

Would you get us some water?

I don't want water.

I'm fine.

No, you're not fine.

You are a mess.

You had way too much to drink here.

We need to get you home.

Come on, come on.

Kit, listen, I'm fine.

Would you please just let me...

You are not fine.

Just let me stay here.

No.

Would you get your...

you're not my f*cking mother!

I know I'm not your f*cking mother!

You know, it's not your fault, okay?

So where did you get this?

I got it from her.

It's a present.

You like it?

I love it.

This thing with Dylan, it's a disaster!

She'll get over it, girlfriend.

She's got a good thing here with you.

Helena messed up, okay?

And I really think she needs to try and fix it up with Dylan.

They belong together!

Helena and Dylan?

But, don't you love Helena?

Yeah, I love her.

Yeah.

Then why do you push her in someone else's arms?

You two, you have more than just a romance.

You're partners.

And I think that you're good for each other.

You actually thought that I was a lesbian?

Well, you see, my body, it doesn't respond to his own kind.

You know?

But, like, this is ooh...

this is what I'm talking about right here.

Get out of my face.

Listen, I want you out, and you...

I gotta check this on before it gets out of control, okay?

I'll meet you here at : .

Look, Dagmar, I'll be here at : a.m.

if you insist, but you know Grace is gonna scoop you.

Why don't you just swing by on your way?

I promise, you will not be disappointed.

Okay, great.

Alright, see you then.

Bye.

Dagmar Venas is coming and so is Chris Knight from the L.A.

Time!

Wentworth-Porter takes L.A., baby.

You can come down, I'll do it.

Thanks.

Any celeb's coming?

James, can you check if we heard back from Nikki Stevens?

I put another call to her publicists.

I invited her.

She might come.

I also invited a whole smooth of agents from C.A.A.

Oh my God!

My ex just texted.

He wants a Dugo Gram.

How's that?

Left?

Any one in particular?

He wants a female nude, of course.

I wouldn't begrudge him liking a female nude.

No, I wouldn't either.

Just as long as he's paying full price.

Oh, he's overpaying, my love.

How is it going in New York?

It's actually going incrediby well.

No one here seems to care about the mystery of the stolen "Lez Girls" negative.

Can you put that on my table, please?

And all they want to talk about, you know, gossip, they wanna talk about movies.

Interesting.

Don't you love New York?

I do.

I'm starting to see what you were talking about.

How's the show?

God, the gallery's looking great.

I wish you were here.

Yeah, me too.

My lunch today is with Jane Rosenthal.

She's De Niro's partner in Tribeca.

Well, that sounds exciting.

The meeting I had yesterday, it actually went better than I expected.

We have a slight emergency.

Sorry, T., I gotta run.

Minor artist crisis.

Yeah, okay, no problem.

Actually I see my lunch walking in the door.

I'm gonna be completely slammed for the rest of the afternoon, so I won't call you until late tonight from the hotel.

Everything goes really really well.

And I love you.

I love you too.

So, what's the crisis?

Okay, we're getting all these last minute RSVPS, and I'm just concerned because I don't think we're gonna have enough oysters.

Are you kidding me?

No, it's just we're expecting people...

No, I mean you're kidding me?

You got me off the phone with Tina to talk to me about oysters?

I'm sorry.

I don't know.

The call it seemed like it wasn't so important.

It just looked like she was checking up on you.

No, we don't do that to one another.

We support each other.

Then what's up with tonight?

I mean, I don't think that's very "supportive".

She would be here if she could.

She has business in New York.

More important than being here for you?

Kelly, you know what?

It's taken us a long time to get to this point, but Tina's work is just as important to her as mine is to me and that's a good thing.

It's good for our relationship, it's good for our bank account.

I'm surprised, I mean, I don't know she strikes me as your wife.

No, not a wife.

That's good.

I'm coming!

Coming, coming!

You look amazing!

Really?

I was gonna change.

I wasn't really so sure about it.

No, you look great.

Who's this?

That's Bubba.

Hey, Bubba.

Did you tell him to lead us in?

It's like this way.

Wow, this is amazing!

Thanks.

Really cool.

It's really nice.

Hey, mister.

How long have you lived here?

Since like .

Wait, did you live here with Mona?

Oh, for, first second she moved in and she moved out.

I actually got it well, as you will see.

It's really cool.

These are your brothers?

Yep, and that's my dad.

Is that you and your mom?

Yeah, separate and not equal.

She's really pretty.

Thanks.

Hey, could you, could you help me with this, it's like...

Sure.

What do you want me to do?

Zip it?

I haven't worn it for a while.

Yeah, like just...

I'm gonna pinch you.

There.

Thank you.

Okay.

What do you think this one?

Is this...

Yeah, it's great.

I don't like too hoochi.

You look nice.

Really?

Okay.

So I think of these as exploratory paintings.

Really, but combinate in a line of three dimensional space, you know actually when, when I think of my life it's really all about the search for the fundamental substance of the line and you know, when you think of this...

Look at this.

My sister's back!

Wow, she really knows how to throw a party.

The Grams were completely sold out, I think.

Are you serious?

I think so.

Can I just...

It seems we're lucky.

I have to tell you that Elope...

How are you?

Oh, I'm just great.

Oh my God!

This looks fabulous.

You like?

Isn't this amazing?

Wentworth-Porter.

Spectacular.

I'm Helena Peabody.

I know.

Good to meet you.

Kelly Wentworth.

You too, you too.

Guys, you know what?

Can we get, can we get a couple of pictures?

Sure.

You look is fabulous.

Oh, that's a little close, no?

Could you back it up a little?

Hey, one full length just 'cause we've gotta get the great shoes.

Oh yes, absolutely.

Work it.

Thank you.

Thank you, that's great.

Thank you.

You guys enjoy.

You know what?

You can start up with that room.

It's Dugo Gram.

I think it's one of our favorite artists.

And the paint is "Kelly Cooper".

Okay.

Great.

I'm gonna get a drink first.

Great.

See you.

Take it easy.

Enjoy.

Later!

Those are two lovely art dealers.

Sleazeball.

You're here to look at art, not women.

How are you?

What?

You gave me sh*t 'cause you think I'm flirting with that girl, Jamie, and now you're gonna do the same?

Don't flip me!

Do not flip me!

Isn't this cool?

Yeah, this, this one in particular is really something.

Yeah, Bette has really outdone herself with this art.

You must be proud of her.

I am proud of her.

You know that.

Look at Miss Bette over there.

And it's a gorgeous gallery.

They do make a very beautiful couple.

They're not a couple.

I know they're not a couple, but they look like a couple.

They're just both tall.

And you have excellent taste.

Cheers!

Cheers!

Thank you.

I don't know how you can eat those things.

You don't like them?

I don't like them because it reminds me of a guy coming in your mouth.

I'm just saying.

Don't throw...

Why, why would you try to do that to me?

I just wanted to say that that's why I don't like them, you asked me why I don't like them, so I said...

Well if that's the case then you can kiss me because you know what that tastes like.

Don't!

This is my first showing with this gallery, but you know, I tell you Bette and Kelly just really inspired me by all their work.

It's like a giant cat threw up, huh?

What do you think?

I don't get it.

Well, it's art.

You see?

Who is it?

Nikki, over here!

You know what?

Thanks.

You're welcome.

Alright, thanks guys.

Thank you.

Over here, Nikki!

Beautiful!

Nikki, this way, over here!

Bye!

Thanks guys.

Come on.

Bye guys.

Thank you!

No, no, we didn't get to talk yet.

Hi!

Hey, it's Bette, right?

Oh gosh, I'm so flattered that you remember me.

Of course.

How are you?

This is my business partner, Kelly.

Hi, Kelly, how are you?

Business partner?

Welcome.

You know, you know what, do you mind if we get a quick picture?

Oh, no, not at all.

Oh, great, thank you.

That dress is gorgeous.

We just wanna get a couple, okay?

Alright, just do it.

Great.

Just a couple full length too.

Perfect.

Thank you.

Great.

Thanks.

I'm gonna take a look around.

This is great.

I mean, I don't really know much about art, but it looks awesome.

Thank you.

If you have any questions, you know, feel free to ask.

Okay, great.

I don't know if you know but Chris Knight is here from the L.A. Time.

Oh great.

Just, you know, ahead and we won't, you know, they're not gonna bug you.

You're here, you're safe, it's all good.

I'm sorry.

Enjoy.

No, it's okay.

Thank you.

Take care.

What up sexy Shane?

What's up, Nik?

So uh...

I think I've seen enough of this place.

All in two seconds, you're done?

All in two seconds.

Yeah, you wanna get outta here?

You, uh...

You have a car?

I do have a car.

Let's go.

Alright.

We're gonna have to sneak by these two at the door.

Yeah, you go first.

Alright.

Come on, I kinda need a bluff.

You go first.

Are you guys going?

Wait.

No, I just forgot something in my car.

I'll be right back.

Alright, great.

Shane's gonna come with me.

Help me look find it.

Yeah, you got it.

Okay, cool.

Cool.

Have fun.

Oh, I wish those could be one at a time.

I'm not doing, Kit.

I'm gonna go home.

You're gonna be alright.

Yeah, I'll just, uh, I'll take a sleeping pill.

Good night.

You know, love sucks.

It really does.

Then again, it can be grand.

Have we met?

Briefly.

I noticed you earlier.

Right, right, right.

And I thought to myself that's one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen.

And I'd love nothing more than to take her home with me tonight and wake up in the morning with her arms and legs wrapped around me.

You know her?

Yeah, we work together.

Unfortunately she only thinks of me as her girlfriend.

They're like the ultimate power couple those two.

Who?

Bette and Kelly?

I know they're not a couple.

They just seem like one, don't they?

Look at the way that they touch each other, the way that they finish each other's sentences.

Have any of you guys seen Shane?

Did somebody say something?

Alice, I'm serious.

Have you seen Shane?

We haven't seen her.

I feel sorry for her.

Don't!

She just wears that she's been really damaged.

That's the one thing that scares me about having kids.

I thought you did...

I thought you wanted them.

Oh, I do.

Without question, but, at some point there's always history you have to overcome.

And just parents can...

I know what you mean.

I thought you loved your parents.

No, I do, but, I don't know, like, it scares the sh*t out of me when I, when I see myself acting just like them.

Behaving like them.

Yeah, exactly.

Like my dad.

He was such an assh*le.

I don't know how my mom put up with it.

Did your dad pull any of that macho m*llitary sh*t when you were growing up?

Oh yeah, big time.

Yeah, so did mine.

It was just cops though.

He did never...?

What about your bros?

He'd b*at the sh*t out of them.

I remember one time he'd b*at my oldest brother so badly that my mom had to keep him from highschool like three days.

And then she covered for my dad.

It's crazy.

God!

My mom used to cover for my dad too.

I mean, he never touched me or my mom, but...

Actually he never noticed us.

I got more decorations than any of my brothers and this was the point like where I said, "Yeah, he's gonna notice me now", but he still didn't give a sh*t.

That's why I quit the academy.

Right when I was in the middle of it I realized that I was doing it just to get his attention.

The only time my dad ever paid attention to me was when I got my discharge.

And then he said that that I'm disgraced by my country.

Oh God!

You didn't disgrace anyone.

You are amazing.

You're amazing.

Why didn't you tell me any of that?

Ever?

I don't know.

Well, it doesn't really matter.

You know, it's how it's always been.

It's not gonna change anything.

Well, you've got me.

I'm gonna give you lots of attention.

Jamie, huh, I've gotta thank you.

I mean, Tasha's never opened up like that before.

I guess it's 'cause you're a counselor.

Maybe.

Anything I could do to help.

So what are you doing right now?

I'm just focusing it.

That's good.

Is everyone as old school as you?

Prehistoric devices?

Yeah, I really like to, you know, honor tradition.

And that's the image right there?

Yeah, that would be the image.

It just lightens up the shadows a little bit.

We'll see.

Oh, you really know what you're doing.

Not really.

I've just like tried it earlier one at the time.

This is so cool.

Don't tell me you've never seen this before?

I actually have not.

I forgot you were born in .

Oh, good one.

It's alright, grandpa.

Wait, who is that?

Is that Molly?

She looks good on that picture.

Yeah, she does.

When did you take it?

I don't even remember.

Well, that's really beautiful, Shane.

You think?

You're quite the photog there, Shane.

Maybe sometime you could sh**t me.

What are you doing?

You know what I'm doing.

What's wrong?

What?

What is it?

Shane?

Oh God!

You don't think you're contagious, right?

Shut up, Nikki.

I'm just going.

Thank you so much.

Oh, she was an angel.

I'm glad that it was such a big success.

It was ?

Did I not...?

Oh no, sorry.

Cool, I'll see you next time.

Yeah, good night.

Drive safely.

I will.

How are you?

What are you doing here?

I was home and I just, I just, I'm overly excited.

I mean this night was just beyond, you know?

Can I, can I come in?

I just, I wanted to, to continue celebrating with you, so...

God, this is wow, amazing.

Hey, leave a message, I'll call you back.

Hey, Shane, where are you?

I've been to the Hit, I've been to the Falcon, I've been to Truck Stop, I've driving from one end of Santa Monica Boulevard to the other, I'm getting ready to go to the f*cking police station.

Can you...?

Where have you been?

Although I...

I think I ate something.

Here.

Oh f*ck!

Come on.

It's time to go home.

Here, put your arm around me, okay?

Are you gonna be sick?

Wait a second.

Oh honey, my poor angel.

It's okay.

f*ck!

It's okay.

Oh God!

Are you gonna be sick again?

I'm coming!

Do you understand that everyone knows about us now, okay?

The night was so amazing!

Everyone is calling me from New York, Wentworth to Porter!

This is incredible!

The show pratically sold out.

Can I have some of that, please?

Shake it, don't fake it.

Wentworth-Porter.

Give me some.

Wait, wait, wait, Ed, can we talk about Ed?

Ed, excuse me, Brocher, was there, okay?

My dear friend.

He comes to all of my openings.

Come on, wait, tonight, can I just say that I would k*ll to show him what...

Just take it easy.

Give it a couple of years and maybe we'll approach him.

That would be waiting.

Just trust me.

Cheers.

Good night.

It's gonna be better tomorrow.

I'm gonna be right next door if you need me.

Good work!

Oh partner!

What are you doing?

I'm just cashing in on a little rain check?

You think so?

You're drunk?

No, I'm not.

Yeah, you are.

I'm, I'm telling you how I feel.

You're really drunk 'cause you know what?

That coupon it expired like years ago.

Oh no, I don't think so.

Yeah, it did.

Read it closely.

Really?

I am in love with Tina and I have no intention or desire...

Stop it.

Nice move, Wentworth.

Jesus, I'm calling your mother.

Oh my God!

Please tell me these are not destroyed.

Sleep well.

Thanks for taking care of me.

Of course.

I'm always gonna be there for you, Shane.

Good night.

How about you get a cab and drive you home?

sh*t!

I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

Yes.

Oh my gosh...

We're just gonna forget about this, okay?

I'm sorry.

Oh, Bette...