05x02 - Blame It on the Rain

[bunniefuu]

- Previously on "Killjoys" -

- You, uh, recognize this kid?

- Nope.

A Killjoy has a warrant for our son.

Those guys don't come looking for you to say hello.

Did you just try to sh**t me?

What do you know about what's really going on?

Everyone on this moon is under some sort of mass hypnosis.

- No, no, no, no.

- [BRACELET BEEPING]

She's awake.

How?

Never underestimate my girls.

Kendry!

Do you know who I am?

I've been trying to forget you since the day we met.

What is going on in Westerly?

Terraforming.

- Wanna see?

- [THUD]

[CHUCKLING]

High stress levels trigger the decon bracelets and the showers encode a false memory.

It's like literal brainwashing.

Yalena Yardeen, we have a Warrant for your arrest.

- What do we do?

- Take this.

I can't do this without you, Zeph.

- [g*nsh*t]

- No!

[WHIMPERS]

She's all alone now.

Then why are you so scared of her?

[WHIMPERING]

Remember, you're never far from a decon shower.

Take a moment to locate the showers nearest you.

- Not here, b*at it.

- I haven't got a lot of time.

Did you get what I asked for?

This is a relationship business.

As in, if you want to do business with me, we need to have a relationship.

Yeah, sorry.

I'm not a relationship type of person.

Relax.

I know who you are.

You do?

Yala.

From the Royale.

No shame in buying a little street heat to dull the pain.

- Right.

- Vikes, and What's a gal like you want with antibiotics?

I'm gonna snort it.

In a drug person way.

[CHUCKLES]

Nice.

And how you want to pay for that?

What the dusty sh*t is that?

Vintage.

So are my balls, honey, but that don't buy me dinner.

[BANGING]

Get out of here, you damn drunk.

Sorry, friend.

Who you calling friend?

Zeph.

How are you doing?

Are you okay?

I got what you asked for.

Good, because I'm about to pass out.

Ooh.

Where's your healing wand?

Doesn't matter, something's stuck in there.

You're gonna have to operate.

Okay, you're up.

Try not to k*ll me.

Zeph?

Zeph!

Oh, sh*t.

[ROCK MUSIC]

Ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh Ooh, ooh [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

Keep your family safe.

Decon shower just in case.

Hey!

Oh, sorry.

- Wrong woman.

- Creep.

[EXHALES]

You'll never catch her.

I will if you help me.

And why would I help you catch my wife?

Because if I don't Someone else will.

You know what?

Find another bar.

We're closed.

Hey.

Stop passing out.

[GROANING]

I smell egg.

Did you make yourself a sandwich while I was unconscious?

Why, is it against your fancy medical rules?

Yes!

Did you even scrub up afterwards?

[GROANS]

Hey, you need to stay awake.

Come on, talk to me about science things.

Do you think we can really figure out a way to wake people up?

In theory.

Between the showers and the rain this Lady of yours is obviously using engineered proteins to rewrite memories.

If I can create an inhibitor, I should be able to [SHRIEKS]

I need more pain meds!

No, no, no, just hang in there.

You're maxed out.

Can you feel anything in there?

Some kind of bone shard?

- You have to pull it out!

- This is why I ate first.

Ugh!

Ew!

Good!

No, gross!

- Gods, this is not a splinter!

- Do you want me to stop?

[SCREAMS]

I want you to hurry up, woman!

I mean, relax, sweetie, you're doing great.

You're such a good doctor.

No, no, no, no, no.

Don't you dare.

Not unless you want a second belly button.

- Ah!

- [GASPS]

Got it.

Okay.

Good.

Now sew me up and let's never talk about this again.

Sew?

What's the problem?

Besides it being prehistoric I-I don't know how to sew.

I thought you said you were a princess in your old life.

Yeah, definitely not that kind of princess.

[GROANING SOFTLY]

Oh, tits.

Why does this have to be the one thing you're sh*t at?

Oh.

All right, people, you know the drill.

This is a Black Warrant.

So the danger is high, and the reward, ooh, is it sweet.

- Our target?

- Yala.

Your target has a name.

That she does.

Yala Yardeen lived and worked right here.

Odds are she's somewhere nearby being hidden by someone she knows.

First one to find her gets the prize.

I told you, you don't need to be here while we shake the place down.

I got nothing to hide.

Plus I want to be here when she gets back.

So what's a Black Warrant anyways?

Open competitive Warrant.

Brings out all the top Killjoys.

Only the best for my girl.

It's a Level Five, John.

A k*ll Warrant.

Pree.

She's a bartender.

What the hells are you doing?

They're calling her The Widow.

Well, that's just poor research.

I'm standing right here.

Word is she k*lled her first husband.

First husband?

And that she's a t*rror1st for hire.

Whoa, go back to that first husband part.

Look.

You're as much a victim here as anyone.

You don't owe her sh*t anymore.

So do yourself a favor and tell me how to find her.

Where's Yala?

Hey, Johnny boy.

Hey.

Turin's looking for you.

Better watch your back.

The dealer with the hair?

What the hells he want?

He says your wife stiffed him.

Yala was buying dr*gs?

Buying, yeah.

Paying, not so much.

How do you feel about watching the Royale for a bit?

No thanks.

I don't really see myself as a bartender, you know?

I'll see you.

Everyone out!

We're closing early.

Hello?

Hello.

Is anybody home?

We're closed.

Ha.

Funny.

Do you mind?

Ship, lights.

[THRUMMING]

You'll never find Yala.

Haven't we already had this conversation?

I've got a lead.

So about your offer?

I'm in.

Why?

Because this whole city is hunting my wife and I need to find her first.

And for whatever reason she trusted you.

So if I'm gonna help you, you have to promise to bring her in alive.

[SIGHS]

Ow.

- [GROANS]

- Oh, good, you're awake.

Come on.

Upsy-daisy.

Are you serious?

Agh!

I know, I know, I know.

D'Avin's a really good tracker, it's only a matter of time before he finds me.

So we need to shut down these factories before that happens.

I thought he was your family.

Yeah, but he doesn't remember that.

Okay, well, I guess my brain's not injured.

I can do this.

If I don't die of sepsis first.

All right.

So this Lady of yours has us re-terraforming our own planet so we just have to figure out why.

Whys are for later.

We need to figure out how to shut this sh*t down now.

Focus, Zeph.

There must be some kind of weakness, or sabotage point.

What do we do to find it?

More information.

Okay, good.

How do we get it?

Well, I've unlocked this slate.

But the Company keeps their high-value data on encrypted passkeys.

Only a couple of guards have access.

If I could get my hands on one of those Okay, good.

One passkey coming right up.

Uh Wait, you're gonna go out there with all those Killjoys on your tail?

Believe me, that's the least of our problems.

What?

[SHIP ENGINES THRUMMING]

Do you like her?

Who is she?

What is this?

Wait.

- What are you doing?

- [ANKLET BEEPS]

[SCREAMING]

Help!

Help!

Help me!

[SCREAMING]

[CRIES]

[DRAMATIC MUSICAL TONES]

Who are you?

You know who I am.

We're well acquainted.

Now you know what I can do.

You still think I fear your Yala?

Perhaps I'll wear her next.

[TENSE MUSIC]

[MAN WHISTLING]

Don't forget to decontaminate.

Take a moment to locate then nearest shower.

Well, well, well.

Just the man I was hoping to run into.

I heard you ran into my wife.

Not as hard as I will once I find her again.

About that.

We have a proposition.

Well, hot damn.

Does it involve me throat-punching one of you two?

No.

It involves you telling us what you know about Yalena Yardeen.

Now.

You team up with a Killjoy to turn in your own wife?

That is some tacky sh*t, son.

Who raised you?

Go flash your fascist-pig p*stol at some dumbass girl that cares.

'Cause we're not afraid of you, hoss.

sh*t.

You sure?

And I bought him lunch.

It's okay.

He'll get what's coming to him.

The scales always balance.

[SLURPS]

You know, you seem pretty relaxed for a man with a g*n on you.

Yeah, well.

I've made my peace with this world.

This is my time, it's my time.

Also your wife pissed me off.

I ain't doing squat to help you two little lovebirds reunite.

Okay.

What if I let you punch him?

What?

I'm listening.

Would that help balance the scales?

Screw your scales.

You know what?

I think it would.

Come on.

- Take one for the team.

- What, are you crazy?

[GRUNTS]

Hoo!

Really needed to knock my chakras back into place.

[COUGHING]

Feeling good!

Oh Now, about my wife?

She's smart, she didn't let anything slip.

But I do know something about that tech she tried to pay me off with.

Unusual stuff.

Old school.

There's only one other person in Old Town who deals in that kind of sh*t.

A woman I like to call Stinky Raincoat.

What kind of name is that?

One that is ac-cur-ra-tay.

You mean the crazy conspiracy girl who's scared of water who's always in my bar stinking it up?

Mm-hmm.

Where do we find Stinky?

Hmm.

Toxins can be anywhere.

Decon showers are always nearby.

- - [TENSE MUSIC]

Hey!

Why'd you grab my ass?

What?

I didn't.

Well, it didn't grab itself.

You're not even my type, man.

I'm everyone's type.

It's a curse.

You're kind of an assh*le, you know that?

Hey.

Sexy people have feelings too.

Keep your family safe.

Is the Warrant on Jaq still open?

I wouldn't worry about that right now.

Why, because there's a mother-sucking k*ll Warrant on my wife, too?

- Did I mention you're the worst?

- What can I say?

Your family's keeping me in the black.

Thanks.

Do you even know what she's after?

If I did, do you think I'd be here with you?

Look, the only way we're gonna find her is if you open the hells up.

I feel pretty open considering you just let someone sucker punch me.

I think this is it.

Remember, if you're Stinky Raincoat.

This place sucks.

What the hells is that?

Some kind of high-tech bird bath?

I think it's a weather station.

How do you know that?

I don't know, I just do.

Well, your guess is as good as mine.

Better.

My guess is better than yours.

[SCREEN CHIMES]

Turin's right, this thing's old school.

Doesn't have much range.

If she's tracking the data remotely, she's gotta be within a 700 meter radius.

It says so right here.

We should set up a search grid.

Sure, we could do that.

Or We could make her come to us.

Not again I'll deal with that later.

Blueprints.

Pull up the blueprints again.

Do you want to drive?

Maybe you'll do as good a job as you did sewing up my wound.

Right.

You saw that, did you?

Oh, yeah, it's great.

What woman doesn't want an extra pocket?

Now I'll never lose my keys.

And you call me the princess.

[BEEPING]

[GASPS]

What is it?

Did you find a way in?

Yes, but, uh I also found a problem.

A big one.

- I was wrong.

- About what?

Changing the ecosystem of something as large as a moon is something you'd normally expect to happen on geologic time.

Even terraforming, we're talking generations before you'd reach the tipping point where native life could no longer exist, but This, uh, Lady of yours, she has Zeph.

How long do we have?

27 days.

27 days of breathable air left.

There are so many of factories.

There's no way we can shut them all down in time.

No, but there may be a way to slow her down.

See these ones?

They're receiving a different shipment of chemicals.

Drawing more power.

I think each one might be some kind of hub.

If we can put even one of these hubs out of commission we might be able to slow it down.

Pull up the blueprints again.

If we can put detonators here, here, there, there, here, and probably right there.

This does not look like a one-woman job.

Well, good thing there's two of us.

Too bad only one of us can walk.

Good point.

Well, you're gonna have to go up there and fix my receiver.

I can't be your eyes and ears without that connection.

Okay, but I'm still gonna need backup, Zeph.

Hey.

You know how you were talking about being able to wake people up?

With a protein inhibitor?

That was a theory.

What if it was reality?

Because we need recruits, and I can't go around locking everyone up in rooms with their favorite childhood toys.

Anyway.

Wish me luck.

So is this what Killjoys do?

They just sit around and eat noodles?

It's called a stakeout.

Think you could do better?

Well, what's worse look like?

You know, I've seen your wife's type before.

Is this another motivational speech?

What do you think she's gonna do when we find her?

I think she's gonna yell at me for closing the bar.

We make serious bank on the weekends.

She's going to run.

How much do you actually know about her?

We're married, aren't we?

Has she ever shared any childhood memories?

Showed you any pictures?

When you got married was her family there?

What's her father's name?

What's your point?

All those questions you want to ask her, are you sure you want the answers to them?

This is bullshit.

I know Yala.

I know everything about her.

I know how she likes her Hokk.

What kind of shampoo she uses, that she likes to brush her teeth as soon as she wakes up.

We have a son.

Sweet.

Her side gig as a t*rror1st?

She tell you about that?

If you know everything about her, how come you haven't found her yet, hmm?

Where are you going?

I think I'm better off without you.

- You're fired.

- You didn't hire me.

Don't care.

You're still fired.

[PENSIVE MUSIC]

Ah, I should have found her by now.

- What the hells am I missing?

- Another drink?

Sure.

Why not?

Just 'cause he's the "professional" thinks he can stick his nose in my perfectly happy marriage.

[SIGHS]

Remember, if your bracelet chimes, you know it's time.

Head to your nearest decon shower immediately.

[WATER RUSHING]

Balls.

I shouldn't have been thinking of a 700-meter grid, I should have been thinking of a 700-meter cube.

Okay, come on, Johnny.

It's your wife down there.

You love this woman.

You know this woman.

I mean, you kind of know this woman.

Zeph?

Where are you at with the protein inhibitor thingy?

Working on it.

Well, work faster.

I figured out a way to recruit some new bodies but first we're gonna have to wake them up.

A woman who knows what she wants.

I am so into that.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Agh!

[SCREAMS]

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Hiyah!

[GRUNTING]

Hey, Ship.

How long have I been here?

I'm sorry, sir, I didn't realize I was supposed to be monitoring your whereabouts.

Oh, of course not.

Why would you?

You're just a dumb ship.

That alley behind me.

Are there any other entrances?

Ship.

It would appear your instincts are correct, sir.

It's fenced off, but there is another entrance.

And you didn't think to tell me that?

I'm afraid it didn't occur to me, being a dumb ship and all.

Yal?

Are you here?

Oh, wow.

I take that back.

I really, really do not know this woman.

[GRUNTS]

Hello, soldier.

I was hoping it'd be you.

What are you doing here?

I could ask you the same thing.

Just, uh Science.

With a side of ass-kicking.

But you know what I really want to do?

Play tag.

You're it.

Remember, you're never far from a decon shower.

Take a moment to locate the showers nearest you.

[COCKS g*n]

[GASPS]

You're not gonna sh**t me.

What makes you so sure?

I know you.

You can't.

Look, whoever they told you I am I'm just trying to do the right thing here.

How's that working out for you?

[SCOFFS]

Not great.

You're a Killjoy.

I'm a bartender.

We don't know each other.

But you feel like we do.

Why?

You have that kind of a face.

Look around you.

Ask yourself why it all feels so wrong.

Is this the point where you try to convert me?

I would if I could.

But it's not that easy.

I don't want to do this alone.

Your bracelet.

What's it for?

When you think about the past, how far back can you remember?

Why does it rain at the same time every single night?

Move any closer and I will sh**t.

Ask yourself why.

D'Avin.

Why can't you do it?

[BRACELET BEEPING RAPIDLY]

[BOTH EXHALE]

Who am I to you?

[TENSE MUSIC]

I am enjoying this new skin.

Was there something wrong with that other body?

You want to know about me.

I want to know about your missing daughter.

- Shall we make a deal?

- She's not my daughter.

You think of her as one.

You were inside her head.

What can I tell you that you don't already know?

[SCREAMING]

Tell me where she is!

Tell me why you brought me out of the Green.

Khlyen.

You're the one in chains.

And you're the one asking me for favors.

You think you can figure this out.

Don't you?

I love that confidence.

It's what I find most charming about humans.

Confidence born of generations of ignorance.

Why do you want her?

What is she to you?

The question you should be asking yourself is what are you to me if you don't deliver?

Dead, I suspect.

[MOCK GASPS]

You're not so ignorant after all.

[PANTING, GROANS]

Zeph?

They found us.

We have to get out of here.

- Who?

- Your husband.

I don't know how he tracked us down, or how he knows we're working together, but he was here, and he was going through my stuff, and I just feel very violated.

Also he stole one of my slates.

Your protein inhibitor thing.

Where are we at with that?

It's ready.

We just need to test it.

Didn't expect you back.

You were right.

I was?

We've been married for 16 years and I don't even know who my wife is.

Tracked her friend's tech to her hidey-hole, it's like a true crime vid down there.

Real t*rror1st sh*t.

Makes me wonder how crazy the both of them are.

She's not crazy.

What do you mean?

I don't even know if she's a t*rror1st.

I found her.

I had her.

Well, she had me.

She gave me this.

Blueprints for some sort of chemical factory.

Stinky Raincoat was tracking shipments to the same factory.

It's too easy.

She's gotta be setting you up, right?

Not if we get there first.

We?

Well, I made a promise.

Right?

Let's find your wife.

Oh, and also, I'll sh**t you if you screw this up.

Fair warning.

Understood.

You just have to get it right between my vertebrae.

[YELPS]

Great.

Are you sure you're ready to do this?

Yes.

Even if this goes wrong, it shouldn't incapacitate me too much.

I'm not talking about the science.

I know.

Just tell me.

What was I like when I was me?

Was I happy?

Did you like me?

Everyone did.

But some of your real memories, Zeph are gonna hurt.

You lost people because of me.

It's okay.

I need to know the good and the bad.

- You ready?

- No.

Yes.

Whatever.

Just When I say go, hit that button.

Okay, go.

Agh!

Meet me in the middle.

[GROANING, CRYING]

Pip!

[BREATHING HARD]

Pippin I don't want to miss him all over again.

I know, I'm sorry, Zeph.

I'm sorry.

It's all my fault.

It's all my fault.

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry.

No, it's not.

It's hers.

What do you need?

To make this bitch pay.

A shower a day keeps the toxins away.

All workers must be decontaminated before and after shifts.

Halt.

Come on, get out.

I'm a Level Six Killjoy, I have a Warrant to bring in a known t*rror1st.

Yeah, yeah, look, you're still gonna need clearance.

[YELPS]

Hi.

Well, sh*t.

I'm not gonna hurt you.

But I need you to come with me.

I will, I promise.

But not yet.

Hi.

Don't know if anyone noticed, but I'm standing right here.

What are you doing, Yala?

I'm saying goodbye to my husband.

I'm done playing.

I just want my wife back.

I can't give you that.

I'm sorry.

But I promise you in about a minute, none of this will matter.

[GRUNTS]

All right, Zeph.

Light 'em up.

Cuing up charge now.

[BOTH SCREAMING]

If this doesn't work, you have to get out of there, Dutch.

It will work, Zeph.

I don't have a lot of faith in people but I have faith in you.

[GROANING]

Dutch?

Is that you?

We've gotta move.

Ugh, I got a really bad

[GRUNTS]

taste in my mouth.

What is that, cheese?

Jaq.

Where's Jaq?

We found him.

With Delle Seyah, he's okay.

What about Aneela?

But I remember, we We destroyed the Green.

We still lost.

The Lady got out and we're running out of time.

Look, I'll explain everything later, but right now we're in one of her terraforming factories.

I'm sorry, did you say terraforming?

Johnny, I need you to plug Zeph into the security system.

Once she's in she can link up our com implants and then she can keep an eye out for bogies while we place charges and blow the sh*t out of this place.

Cool.

You used to work here.

Do you remember where the mainframe is?

Yeah.

It's that way.

Okay.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC]

Not to get super emo here, but were you guys, like, married, married?

What happens between a man and his wife is none of your business.

Well, if his wife is my girlfriend Am I your girlfriend?

Well, are you not my girlfriend?

It just sounds so young.

And I've, you know, k*lled people with forks.

Well, this is awkward.

Have you guys not had the talk?

No.

Because we're adults.

Oh, adults, really?

Because you're the one that kept hitting on - my fake wife, hoss.

- While under the influence of an evil extraterrestrial being.

Just saying it shows poor character.

Look, we've got about 17 minutes until the next of the patrols.

Move now, bitch later.

He's never been good with conflicts.

[SCOFFS]

Remember, in an emergency, always shower first before assisting others.

Zeph?

You should have access to the security system any minute now.

I'm in.

Linking up coms now.

Welcome back, boys.

Let's get this over with so I can take a shower.

Okay, boys.

Holster your inner bros.

It's go time.

You've got a bogey approaching from the north.

Darn it.

Is that Pree?

How did he track us?

Okay, let's split up.

You go ahead.

We'll take care of Pree.

Fine.

Take these detonators.

Try not to k*ll each other while I'm gone.

Five minutes to shift change.

You know, this place doesn't look like I thought it would.

What, compared to all the other alien terraforming factories you've seen?

Valid point.

A little bitchy, but valid.

Left or right?

Left and left again.

You've got another bogey up ahead.

You following me?

Great minds think alike.

Thought we were on the same side.

Oh, we are, cheekbones.

Only I know when I'm being led down the garden path.

We work together, I could help you move up.

Put in a good word with Interstellar.

Sure.

That offer come with a lap dance?

[SIGHS]

She was my target first.

Yeah.

Then you lost her.

Stop moving.

I don't want a pile of paperwork on my desk tomorrow.

- Hey, numb nuts.

- Son of a [LASER BLAST]

- Took you long enough.

- Hey, I'm not the one who was supposed to get him into position.

Wanna help me carry him?

You're the older brother.

I think you mean bigger.

Hmm, size is relative.

Just gonna leave that one hanging.

Hey, Dutch.

Where you at?

Hey, who are you?

Give me a second, boys.

Just dealing with a little distraction.

Heads up.

Don't move a muscle.

Inside that b*mb is a gyroscopic trigger.

Any movements, if you so much as breathe, or even blink They'll be cleaning you off the ceiling.

Have a nice day.

Zeph?

Are you seeing this?

I see it.

What is it?

[SQUELCHING]

And what the hells is that?

So these things Do you think they're her children?

Her species, at least.

Then there's gotta be a reason she's terraforming Westerly.

Maybe these things are it.

She's making them a home?

If you're gonna terraform a whole moon, I guess you want company.

Creepy, creepy company.

Excuse me?

Could you possibly tell me where the washroom is?

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Are you okay?

I'm fine.

Look, Zeph, if the Lady is using Westerly as a little cozy nest for these things, then what are we in the equation?

Uh, lots of possibilities.

Workers, maybe research - Food?

- Could be, yeah.

Well, that's a picnic I don't want to sit at.

Look, we can't be sure that these explosions is gonna take care of these things, so John, D'Av, finish laying the charges to secure our exit.

- While I'll deal with our - Dinner dates?

Not funny, John.

Better hurry up, it's about six minutes to your next patrol.

Thanks for all your help with Snoozy Sparkles here.

Well, it's my pleasure.

Hey, shitbird.

Remember the part where you broke into my ship and tried to sh**t me?

Didn't remember that you were my brother, it doesn't count.

I miss fake Johnny.

I missed you too, assh*le.

[TIRES SQUEALING]

Come to Mommy, you slimy ass-wipes.

[FLAMES WHOOSHING]

[GASPS]

[GRUNTS]

[SCREAMING]

No!

[FLAMES WHOOSHING]

[SCREAMING]

No!

No!

[BEEPING]

[ALARM BLARING]

What was that?

Dutch, was that you?

Might have been, yeah.

What?

Whoa, guys, are you there?

Guys!

Hey, Zeph?

Could we get a little help with the door down here?

Dutch, get your ass down here now.

Zeph!

sh*t.

Double sh*t.

Dutch, are you there?

[GRUNTS]

Agh, sh*t on toast.

Okay.

I'm gonna have to go outside.

[GRUNTS]

Took you long enough!

Did you find a workaround to open the door?

Not before a shitload of muscle comes down on our asses.

Zeph, are you there?

Okay.

Okay, Zeph.

Get it together.

[GRUNTS]

[THUNDER BOOMING]

No.

Gah!

Move, move, move!

Face down, now!

On the ground!

Get down, get down!

sh*t.

Gods damn it.

[BREATHING HARD]

[GRUNTS]

Well, that's weird.

What happened?

Good news.

We found her.

You'll never break her.

I know.

Take him to the transfusion chamber.

What are you doing?

She won't break for me, but she will for you.

She'll know it's not me.

You'll lose her.

And you'll never find Jaq.

Stop.

That's what you're after, isn't it?

Jaq.

That's why you want Yala's team, why you're playing with their memories.

You think they know where he is.

Are you trying to make a bargain, Khlyen?

Yes.

Then choose carefully, because you can only save one.

Your daughter or your grandson.

You know who I choose.

[WOMAN VOCALIZING]