02x02 - Downtime

[bunniefuu]

-Good afternoon. -Good afternoon.

-Reggie, thanks for meeting with me. Everything okay out there?

-Yes. You know. Anyways, I think I know why you're here.

-So, yes, uh, you know, nobody deserves this more than I do.

I have been working so hard.

My customer satisfaction rating is higher than any other person.

An angry old man walks into a grocery store, and he says to the young clerk,

"I'd like to buy half a head of lettuce."

The young clerk takes this in and goes,

"I'm sorry, sir, we only sell whole heads of lettuce."

Now, the old man starts to get real angry now,

and through his bad breath and his snarled teeth he says to her,

"Listen, assh*le, I want half a head of lettuce."

"And if you can't make that happen, you go find me a manager or supervisor or somebody who can."

She says, "Of course, sir," and she walks to her supervisor's office and says,

"I've got this angry, stinky old man out there who wants to buy half a head of lettuce."

And as she's saying this,

she realizes that the old man has followed her into the supervisor's office.

And without skipping a b*at, she says,

"And this fine young man would like to buy the other half, so problem solved."

He leaves.

The supervisor says, "You're quick. Where are you from?"

She says, "Canada, but I left, because everybody's either a hooker or a hockey player."

The supervisor crosses his arms and says,

"My wife is from Canada."

And without skipping a b*at, the clerk says,

"That's wonderful. What team does she play for?"

-So you're the clerk, huh?

-Come on, Reggie, you know I deserve this.

I have worked so hard.

-Michelle, the job's yours.

I've never seen anyone so dedicated to this place.

-Thank you. I can't imagine doing anything else.

This means so much to me.

-I can tell. You really picked the right life.

-What are you gonna do now that you're retired?

-You know, I was thinking of becoming a CEO or maybe a rock star.

-Oh. Well, when you become a rock star, you come and stay here.

I know how you rock stars get, and I can handle it.

-I... might have told some of the other staff about the promotion.

-Bobby? Are you just getting back from your break?

-I started five minutes late. I did. I work for Michelle Weaver.

Learned from the best... you're not gonna catch me slacking.

-Hurry up. We can't have guests waiting 20 minutes for their clothes.

-Yes, ma'am. Uh, congrats on the promotion.

-Thank you. Let's go, let's go.

-I said I'm sorry, sir. But there's nothing I can do about that.

-Well, that's just not acceptable.

You need to either be better or let me speak to your boss.

-My boss is...

-Is here. Hi. How can I help you?

-Are you the manager?

-I am.

-Good. This gentleman caught a very bitchy attitude with us.

-I did not catch an attitude.

-Yes, you did. You really did.

-I simply told you there's nothing I could do.

-Attitude.

-That's attitude. Okay. Go on.

-They have a king suite...

-No, we don't. We paid for a king, but we're not in a king... That's the problem.

Our room has three windows.

The king suite in the brochure shows four windows.

-You know what?

Why don't you get the bellman here to the front desk, please, Geoffrey.

I am so sorry for the inconvenience, Mr. Desmond.

-Well, I'm sorry, too, but we're gonna need more than a little apology.

-Mr. Desmond, we're upgrading you to our penthouse suite.

It has a double king and has lovely views of our garden.

And you know what, why don't you enjoy a complimentary beverage

in our bar while we turn your room over?

-Well... thank you.

-Okay, then.

-Seriously, I don't know how you do it.

-People get so unreasonable.

That's when you have to be extra reasonable.

-Right, right. Yeah.

-I'm gonna go on my break now.

But, Geoffrey, you did have an attitude.

-Congratulations, Miss Manager.

-I'm not gonna lie, it feels good. I think I could really master this.

-Oh, come on. You have mastered this.

-Well, almost.

-Well, we're celebrating tonight. What time do you get home?

-Uh, probably 9:00 at the latest.

-9:00? Aren't you the boss now?

-I did not get to be the boss by half-assing, so I'm not gonna start now.

-Okay. Well, I'm gonna order some dinner and watch Ovation myself, then.

-I will k*ll you.

-This is a huge achievement.

All your sacrifices have paid off, and I love you.

-I love you, too.

-All right, Miss Manager, I'll see you at home tonight. Bye.

-What's going on?

-Have you ever seen anything like that?

-We should run, right?

-Run?

-See you soon.

-Yeah.

-Yo. How long did they say?

-What?

-Downtime. How long is Downtime?

-Michelle Weaver is a woman who's worked her entire life to get where she is in the world.

Now, as this new chapter begins, it's the world itself that's about to change.

She's about to take a break from life as she knows it

and book an extended stay here, in The Twilight Zone.

-You're traveling through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind.

It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition.

And it lies between the pit of one's fears and the summit of one's knowledge.

You are now traveling through a dimension of imagination.

You've just crossed over into The Twilight Zone.

-What is going on? Hey! What is happening?

What is wrong with you people?

Hello? Officer!

Officer, can you help me?

What is that?

-It's just some world maintenance. It was scheduled.

-What-what are we supposed to do?

-We just wake up.

-No. No, no, no, no.

Carl?! Carl! Carl? Carl?

-Hey, hey. Thought you said 9:00.

-Oh, thank God you're okay.

-Hey, I'm here, I'm here.

-Did you see that thing?

-What thing?

-The-the red thing?

-What...

-It's doing weird things to people, it's putting them in a trance or something.

-What? Trance? What?

Jesus, Mary and Joseph. It's the bloody Downtime signal.

-Why are you talking like that?

-How do you forget a thing like that?

It completely slipped my mind.

It's been scheduled for a while now, too.

Issue with the birds or something.

I don't know what's wrong with me.

Must be losing my mind.

-Carl, stop. Stop playing.

-Yeah. Sorry. Danny. Name's Danny.

-Wait. Where are you going?

-Where do you think? I'm going to wake up.

-Wake up? Wake up from what?

-Are you having a laugh? You can drop the character, mate.

-You're starting to scare me.

-You don't remember who you really are, do you?

-I am Michelle.

-No, I mean before Michelle.

-Stop. You're Carl Weaver. You're my husband and my best friend.

You have a crooked big toe and you like to hide little strawberry candies in the bedside table.

-You might want to wake yourself up.

-No. What are you... What are you talking about?

Are these people awake?

-They're not awake. I wish I could help you. I really do.

-Wait, no, don't leave. I-I need... I need you.

-I'll contact them, make sure they send help.

-Who's "them"? Carl, no, no, no, no.

Carl, Carl, no! No!

Carl, please. Don't leave. Please.

Don't-don't move. Who are you?

-We understand you're experiencing an issue?

-Get the f*ck out of my house.

-We're customer service.

-I am not joking.

-Okay, so, basically, we just need to diagnose the issue and get you up and running.

-Who are you?

-She doesn't remember anything. What do we do?

-I don't know. I've never seen this before. Do you know who you are?

-Why does everybody keep asking me that?

-We got to be sensitive to whatever she thinks she's going through right now.

-I got this. Let's lose the Kn*fe.

-What...

-Ma'am. I know you're scared, but you can trust me.

Look, can I play something for you on your TV?

-Hello, dreamer, and thank you for purchasing

the Sleepaway package, the newest in identity tourism.

I'm Kelly Fox, and I'm going to orient you in how it all works.

So, what is it?

Sleepaway is an alternate reality monitored and controlled by our servers

and shared by millions of dreamers around the world.

As you approach REM sleep,

our patented subsonic suggestion technology will sync you up with our servers.

Basically, we use your brain as the computer.

Once engaged, you can create an avatar or select a premade one at random.

Any type of person is inhabitable, and the only rule is, stay in character.

Live an entirely different life while you sleep.

Then, by the end of your character's day,

it'll be time for you to wake up and enjoy your own with fresh eye... With fresh eyes.

-This doesn't make any sense.

So what you're telling me is that none of this is real?

That I am a character played by somebody else?

-S. Phineas Lowell.

-S. Phineas Lowell? Is he a man?

-Yes, you are a man.

Your life and all its specifics were put together

and customized by Phineas Lowell, and then further shaped

by the choices and consequences of his gameplay.

-Okay, okay, okay. Just give me a second.

Okay, even if what you're saying is true, how come I don't remember any of that?

-Truth is, you synced up to Sleepaway last night at your house around 11:15.

You played for a few hours, and then you had a a heart att*ck.

Which sent you into a coma.

-What?

-Phineas is still unconscious.

He's being looked after and monitored, but he's still synced up.

To be honest, we don't even know if or how much of him is still inside of you.

-None of him, okay? Zero percent.

-I think what we're gonna have to do is perform a force-unsync from this end.

-Whoa, whoa. F-Force-unsync. What does that mean?

-If we're gonna restore Phineas, this the best and safest solution.

-Best for whom? For him or for me?

Don't look at him! Look at me.

What does a force-unsync mean for me?

-Well, sir...

-"Sir"? You're not talking to Phineas.

You're talking to Michelle Weaver, okay?

I got a promotion today.

On my own blood, sweat and tears.

This is my life. Just leave me alone.

I'm fine. I'm gonna wait until this Downtime thing is over

and then everything will just go back, right?

-Yeah. Hey. No, she doesn't want to.

No, I don't think that...

Okay. Of course. Send her in.

-Phin?

-What is this? Who are you?

-It's me. Ellen.

-Well, it's really nice to meet you, Ellen, but who the hell are you?

-Ellen's your emergency contact.

She doesn't remember.

-We're married. Phin, I'm your wife. If you like, we can, um...

-You know what? You've done enough.

-Okay, now, hold on.

-No, you hold on.

People pay an arm and a leg for this service,

and as far as I can tell, nobody really understands how it works.

-We understand how you feel about this, but we have the situation in hand.

We think we should force-unsync Michelle in order to...

-No, stop, stop. No one is doing anything to him.

Just... Let me talk to her.

-World maintenance ends in 20 minutes.

World maintenance ends in 20 minutes.

-When I heard that you were still active, I knew that I had to talk to you.

-Look, I-I'm... I'm sorry.

-I'm not going anywhere. I-I'm gonna stay here.

I'm gonna wait until this Downtime thing is over.

I mean, I understand why you wanted to experience "Michelle."

You're strong, brave, you're in control. You're beautiful.

-Thank you. I'm a little freaked out right now.

-We can... I mean, we can just sit and relax for a second.

"Don't break it."

-What?

-It's the first thing you ever said to me.

We were at an-an antique shop by the beach up by where I grew up

and... I was looking at a lamp and when I went to touch it, it just, it cracked in my hands.

And we were the only ones who heard it.

And you mouthed to me, "Don't break it."

Five years later we were sitting in a park kind of like this one but in the real world,

when you got down on one knee and you pointed at your heart and you said...

-"Don't break it."

-"Don't break it." Yeah.

-Phineas Lowell, um, sounds a little corny, to be honest.

-Yeah. You have no idea.

Listen, this is serious, Phin.

If you don't unsync soon, Downtime will end, and you'll be gone forever.

What if I don't get you back, Phin?

It's weird, I have this instant connection to you,

like I've known you my whole life. I can feel him.

And if he is in there, he, he just doesn't know how to get out.

-He's not in here.

-How... How do you know that?

We have been married for 15 years.

We have two beautiful children.

They're waiting for you. We all are.

-Okay. Okay.

I mean, you say that you see him in me, and I feel like me, so maybe I am him.

At least, I'm willing to try.

-Thank you.

-One... Two. I'm sorry. I can't.

-She's here somewhere. Send the bird.

-Oh, sh*t.

-World maintenance ends in five minutes.

World maintenance ends in five minutes.

-Okay. Let's find her.

-World maintenance ends in three minutes.

World maintenance ends in three minutes.

-Hello. Hey. Sorry, didn't mean to startle you.

I'm Tom. I'm, uh, I'm escalated priority customer service.

Gosh, I just want to say I am so sorry for the inconvenience during this Downtime today.

I'm so sorry.

-Call them off.

-I did. I did. They're leaving. They are.

They were just trying to help.

That's all they were trying to do... we're all trying.

To help with this... truly unforeseen error.

-Error?

-Yeah.

-Is that what you're calling it now?

-Yeah, we've had an embarrassing amount of issues for us.

Some mapping inconsistencies downtown that had people

entering a Laundromat and exiting a manhole.

On the other side of town.

And then there was you.

And we're still not quite sure what happened with you,

but we're-we're trying to be very, very careful.

But, um, Downtime is almost over, and players are gonna start logging back in,

and the game's gonna begin for millions of people around the world.

Listen, um... if-if you want to stay and continue as Michelle, that is, that is 100% fine with us, absolutely.

We just ask that you sign this form clearing us of responsibility.

Let me just get this.

-Just like that, huh?

-Sorry?

-Just gonna sweep old Phineas under the rug?

-Don't... please don't think of it like that.

Phineas's family is completely taken care of.

-I'm gonna wake up.

-Okay.

-Just... How could I stay in a world that I know isn't real?

I am not real. Phineas is real. Ellen is real.

I don't know sh*t about their lives, but I feel like it's worth giving it a sh*t.

-You need to forget about Phineas.

-Forget? How can I forget?

Since this orb showed up, all anybody's been telling me is how I am not real and he is.

-It wasn't just a heart att*ck.

He drank a sleeping pill smoothie before syncing up one last time.

Phineas was taken off life support 45 minutes ago.

He passed a few minutes later.

If you log out, there's nothing to go back to.

There's no Phineas.

-But I think I can feel him now.

-Stay here. You can run this hotel.

You can go back to normal.

Okay? All you got to do is just play the game.

-Thank you.

-Please remember the one rule: Don't break character.

You have until the end of Downtime to log out.

Of course, that's up to you.

-Well, what if I don't want to play anymore?

What's the point?

Downtime will end in

ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five,

four, three, two, one.

Downtime is over.

The game has begun.

-How would you feel if you spent your life making your dreams a reality...

Only to find out that reality itself was a dream all along?

We can never know what makes something real,

but today Michelle Weaver has found meaning

in an otherwise synthetic world.

-I would like to rent a room for a few weeks, please.

-And that's good enough for her, here in The Twilight Zone.