03x19 - Prom-asaurus

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Glee". Aired May 2009 - March 2015.*
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A high school teacher tries to reinvent the Glee Club.
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03x19 - Prom-asaurus

Post by bunniefuu »

So here's what you missed on Glee: Rachel choked at her NYADA audition, which meant she blew the biggest audition of her life.

Oh, God.

Which, as far as she's concerned, is now pretty much over.

I had my chance and I choked.

Quinn's in a wheelchair, but her rehab's going well, partly because Joe's been going with her.

Brittany probably forgot she was elected senior class president.

And Puck failed his big geography exam about Iberian precipitation, which means he's not gonna graduate.

And that's what you missed on Glee.

Everything dies.

Maybe the saddest death of all is the death of a dream.

For 18 years, I've had Broadway, stardom.

It was like wings that kept me hovering above the fray.

But I flew too close to the sun and now they're gone and I'm just Rachel Barbra Berry of Lima, Ohio a flightless bird.

A penguin.

Do I look different?
I feel different.

In some ways, it's a relief to be part of the crowd.

My dreams are smaller now, maybe even more real the wedding, winning Nationals but first, prom.

I'll never walk the red carpet as a Tony or Golden Globe nominee.

That's what you get for having no backup plan.

Prom is my night to trip the light fantastic.

Next to my wedding, my prom dress will be the most important gown I ever wear.

I'm surprisingly okay with it all.

That dream was just a favorite old sweater that I kept around even though it didn't fit anymore.

I can grieve it and move on.

I may have lost NYADA, but I still have Finn.

So I'm not going to get everything I thought I ever wanted.

Doesn't make me a loser.

What are you doing?
I am practicing my Prom Queen victory wave.

I'm going to win.

You know, there's a lot of stiff competition this year, Becky.

I wouldn't want you to be disappointed.

Would you mind taking your loser talk somewhere else?
I don't want to catch your failure.

Sexy teen trollop.

Many months ago, to much fanfare, you were elected senior class president.

Oh, yeah.

Since that day, you have accomplished nothing except one memorandum written in crayon saying "Drill, baby, drill." Yeah, I no longer believe we should be drilling for babies.

Your do-nothing presidency has me seriously considering abolishing the post altogether.

And as you are flunking each of your classes, you need class president on your transcript if you hope to gain admittance into college.

No, I don't.

I've already been accepted at Perdue.

The university?
No, the chicken factory.

Miss Pierce, you are making a mockery of this student government, and if you don't make an impact with the rest of your term, your presidency will be this school's last!
I now realize I wasted an entire year belaboring the nuances of my fluid teen sexuality and getting caught up in Lord Tubbington's Ponzi schemes.

Then for a while, I stopped talking.

But I don't want my presidency to be the last one at McKinley.

I don't want that to be my legacy.

Well, Madame President, prom is coming up.

And if you want to rehabilitate your image, perhaps that's where you should start.

Okay.

I don't know who any of you guys are.

Oh, we're the Prom Committee.

We've been meeting since September.

We've sent you 14 memos.

Did you get my memo about drilling for babies?
No.

Good.

'Cause that's not the solution to soaring gas prices.

We're a little behind schedule, but we think we have a great theme for this year's prom.

Cool.

This year's prom theme is "Castles in the Clouds." Nice.

I like your unicorns; Those are great.

But I'm gonna have to say never, 'cause there's no way I'm ever gonna let that happen.

Castles are very heavy, so putting them on clouds would be extremely dangerous.

I seriously think the three of you should be put in jail.

Okay.

Um, what about "Stairway to Heaven"?
Not unless we also build escalators to heaven for the disabled students.

Plus, I'm not really sure if they're even allowed into heaven.

It's clear that the three of you are incompetent fools, possibly some sort of t*rror1st cell.

So, as president, I'm gonna decide what the prom theme is going to be this year.

And I think that it should be "Dinosaurs." Dinosaurs?!
Yeah.

The Bible told me that dinosaurs and cavemen lived side by side for millions of years in peace, and I think that's something that we should totally celebrate.

No, you can't be serious.

That's the worst prom theme ever.

When you insult my dinosaur prom theme, that's bullying, and I will not accept it.

By the power vested in me as president, you are all fired.

Sorry, Rachel, that includes you.

But I guess I'll see you in Glee Club, so Good meeting, guys.

Good morning, McKinley High!
First of all, to those of you thoughtful enough to leave maternity gifts outside my office, both I and my unborn child thank you for your lackluster cr*cker Barrel meat-and-cheese medleys, and I'm sure that my trash can will find them delicious.

Now it's time to announce this year's Senior Prom Court nominees.

Your choices for Prom King are Rick "The Stick" Nelson.

Yeah!
You know this!
President Brittany S.

Pierce.

That's weird.

And also, Finn Hudson.

And now on to the category we all really care about: Prom Queen.

Becky for Prom Queen 2012!
Missy Gunderson.

Santana Lopez.

And Quinn Fabray.

Congratulations to all our nominees Becky, Becky, Becky!
That's an antique!
I was robbed, Coach!
So are you bummed you didn't get nominated for Prom Queen?
In what world would I ever be nominated for Prom Queen?
Well, I voted for you.

And I got that crossed-eyed dude in my study hall to vote for you, too.

That's very sweet of you, but I'm not upset at all actually, because I am gonna be spending my entire prom night dancing with my devastatingly handsome future husband to be.

We'll make your posters later, okay?
Okay!
A big congrats to all our prom nominees!
But, hey, listen up.

We are all winners, because Principal Figgins asked New Directions to sing again this year!
Come on!
Fantastic.

All right.

Brittany has an announcement.

Hello, my fellow Americans.

The theme for this year's prom will be "Dinosaurs." Sheer genius.

Thanks.

I was inspired by the new girl Joe, who reminds me of a cavewoman.

The refreshments will be berries, meat and rainwater.

As you are no doubt aware, the U.S. elections are riddled with corruption.

Therefore, to keep the prom elections completely aboveboard, I have appointed Santana and Quinn to count the ballots.

What?
That makes no sense!
Shut it, Richard Simmons.

Yes, Quinn's my homegirl, but I don't trust her, and you know she doesn't trust me.

We'll keep each other honest.

You know, It's actually not a bad idea.

And last but not least, all hair gel has been banned from the prom.

Right.

I'm actually not joking.

Hair gel was not invented until almost 30 million years after the Upper Paleolithic Stone Age.

And frankly, I don't like the way you look.

Therefore, anyone who shows up to prom wearing hair gel will be turned away at the door.

I hereby decree this to be the best prom Ever.

Okay.

Let's start thinking of dinosaur songs.

Hey, did you know about this?
I know you knew about this 'cause it was hung at eye level and I know Quinn couldn't reach up that high to put it there.

Whoa, whoa.

Remember when I told you that if you come at me with the crazy right off the bat that my head goes all empty and I can't really have a productive conversation?
This isn't crazy, this is mad, this is hurt.

This isn't a big deal.

Not a big deal?
I'm gonna have to watch my fiancé dance in front of the entire school with his ex-girlfriend at my senior prom.

If you haven't noticed, Quinn can't dance.

She just about d*ed coming to our wedding.

She asked me if I would campaign with her, and I figured it was the least I could do for our friend.

I can't believe how selfish you're being.

Yeah, well, if you haven't noticed, I'm kind of having a bad week myself.

I can't believe that my entire high school career is gonna end the exact same way it started just some sad little Jewish girl watching you get all the attention with the pretty blonde cheerleader.

Oh Come on.

Good, good, good.

Come on.

All right, now let go of your hands.

You got this.

Just-just let go.

I promise you'll be okay.

You got it.

Good.

Come on.

This is all you.

Look at you.

You have it.

Just-just No-no-no-no-no!
Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm okay.

I knew you could do it.

That was fantastic.

You're amazing.

Thank you for always coming with me.

Totally selfish.

I get to hang with you.

Take a break, then let's show everyone.

Glee and No, no.

Why?
This is huge.

Because it has to be real.

I mean you know, maybe if I practiced a lot, I could walk into the choir room.

Or even prom.

So until then, just promise me you won't tell anybody.

You're gonna be dancing at prom.

I know it.

I, Becky Faye Jackson, was born to be Queen, but my crown has been stolen.

Queens don't always have to look the same, you know.

Sometimes they look different.

Sometimes they're shorter.

Or wear glasses.

What are you smiling about, poster-people?
And stop staring at me!
It's not fun to be stared at.

Becky, I understand you're upset, but this scorched earth reign of terror must come to an end.

First, you declared w*r on xylophones.

Then, you ransacked the cafeteria line.

But, Coach, I want to be Prom Queen, just like I just saw in that commercial.

Oh, Becky, commercials aren't real life.

Advertisers are manipulative alcoholics who use images to play on our emotions.

Haven't you seen Mad Men?
No.

Neither have I.

Becky, let's be realistic: You just didn't have the votes.

For starters, your posters sent a bit of a mixed message.

But my paintbrush doesn't have spell check, Coach.

And second and I mean this as a compliment you're a bitch, Becky.

With a bad attitude.

And honestly, with Quinn Fabray in a wheelchair, the sympathy vote was split.

But here's the goods.

You're coming to prom with me, Becky Jackson, where I'm making you deputy in charge of guarding the punch bowl.

Chin up, Jackson.

And please be careful walking past my brand-new xylophone.

That's the attitude right there, Becky.

The smell of your skin Lingers on me now You're probably on your flight Back to your hometown I need some shelter Of my own protection, baby Be with myself and center Clarity, peace, serenity I hope you know I hope you know That this has nothing to do with you It's personal, myself and I We've got some straightening out to do And I'm gonna miss you Like a child misses their blanket But I've got to get a move on with my life It's time to be a big girl now And big girls don't cry But it's time for me to go home It's getting late and dark outside I need to be with myself and center Clarity, peace, serenity, yeah I hope you know I hope you know That this has nothing to do with you It's personal, myself and I We've got some straightening out to do And I'm gonna miss you Like a child misses their blanket But I've got to get a move on with my life It's time to be a big girl now And big girls don't cry.

Rehearsing for prom?
'Cause I love that song, but it's sort of a downer, don't you think?
It's just how I'm feeling right now, okay?
I don't want to watch Finn and Quinn get crowned the king and queen at my prom.

I don't want to watch him dance with her.

I-I know that she can't really dance anymore, but I'm sorry.

You know you know what I mean.

She's right.

Prom sucks.

Yeah.

I don't want to go, either.

Well, you have to go.

You're the reigning prom queen.

You have to crown the next one.

As much as I love a good coronation, I can't risk it.

With this school's strong and insane tradition of write-in ballots, I could get elected prom queen again, all right?
And I know I put on a brave face last year, but it was humiliating.

And, had I known, I would have worn a full kilt, so How do you think I feel with Brittany's insane ban on hair gel?
It's prom.

There's going to be balloons all over the place, not to mention the taffeta and the silk blends.

The sheer amount of static electricity in that room is going to be terrifying.

It's crazy.

You've never seen my hair without gel it's-it's baby-hair fine.

No, it I'm going to look like Medusa.

It's not funny.

I don't want to go.

Well, if we're all going to be so miserable about it, who says we have to go?
You're right, Kurt.

But I have a better idea.

So Kurt and Blaine and I are throwing an anti-prom party.

What's an anti-prom party?
It's a party for those of us who maybe feel a little, you know, disenfranchised by the actual prom.

And I got us a hotel room at Lima's best hotel, Red Rooster Express Suite, and everyone's invited.

You're supporting this?
I'm supporting her, and I'll be there as soon as I'm done fulfilling my obligations.

The mood will be celebratory, the food will be catered, the libations will be plentiful, and the dress code will be creative black tie.

Optional, optional, optional.

And keeping up with the anti-prom theme, everyone is welcome, and unlike the actual prom, which ends at 11:00 p.m., ours goes until the wee hours of the night.

It's where the fun's at, you guys.

Okay, how is everyone welcome when this is clearly just a party for you and the two gay Winklevii twins?
Actually, Santana, we've invited most of McKinley's underclassmen.

I wanted to invite you to our anti-prom party.

Who's going?
Me, Kurt Boring.

Who else?
Well, we just came up with the idea.

I'll think about it.

- I'm in.

- But what about your tradition of trying to spike Coach Sylvester's punch bowl?
I almost lost my teeth for it last time.

It's impossible.

Plus it's a bummer, always failing at everything.

Can we just talk about what this really is?
Rachel Berry isn't getting her way, so she's punishing the rest of us.

Santana, that's not the case at all.

Stop acting like you're fine and start dealing with your crap.

Look, you choked at your big audition.

I get it.

I'm sorry, but it happens.

And I understand that you're pissed off at the universe, but imploding on one of the last nights that we have to spend together because, basically, you're just not in the mood to dance is maybe the pettiest thing you have ever done.

So have fun at your "I'm a victim" party, acting like you're not some selfish, self-centered, lame-ass wannabe diva from hell, because me, I'm going to go to my senior prom with my girlfriend and my friends.

You can't be too pleased by that stunt Rachel's pulling.

I'm not, but I kind of feel bad for her.

She's going through a lot of rough stuff.

Rough stuff?
Did you forget that you're talking to a girl in a wheelchair?
Yeah, looks good.

We've come full circle.

Yeah, just like old times.

Though, to be clear, there will be no extracurricular activity this time.

I'm going to Yale, and there are no tire store majors there.

Well, neither are there at the Actors Studio, where I'm applying.

Oh, my God.

Quinn Fabray you're so brave to be doing this.

Thank you.

The atrophy in my leg is a constant reminder of the slow, withering remnants of my past life.

The toll can, at times, be physically and emotionally hard, knowing that I may never walk again.

People like you inspire me.

Your healthy, normal legs are beautiful.

You deserve this.

You've got my vote.

Wow, that was super creepy.

It won't be when we're standing up on that stage soaking up the applause.

Don't you feel kind of weird using your injury to get the sympathy vote like that?
Votes are votes, Finn.

Do you want to win or not?
This is awesome.

I actually really love dinosaurs.

Whoa.

Triceratops.

D-I-N-O-S-A U-R a dinosaur D-I-N-O-S-A U-R a dinosaur An O-L-D M-A-N You're just an old man Hitting on me, what?
You need a CAT scan Yeah, you're pretty old Not long till you're a senior citizen And you can strut around with that sexy t*nk of oxygen Honey, your toupee is falling to your left side Get up and go, bro Oh, wait, you're fossilized, ha You sit down, buy me a martini Won't go away, my hips aren't sinking You say "Hey, wanna come with me?" I'm about to barf, seriously D-I-N-O-S-A U-R a dinosaur D-I-N-O-S-A U-R a dinosaur An O-L-D M-A-N You're just an old man Hitting on me, what?
You need a CAT scan Hey, dinosaur Baby, you're prehistoric Hey, dinosaur That's what you are, ha Hey, carnivore You want my meat, I know it Hey, dinosaur That's what you are, ha Hudson Hog, take a deep, meaningful drink of Sue Sylvester's Special Prombrosia.

I don't know if it's the sentimental fetus in me talking, but I think it's my best batch ever.

Nothing but Fruit Juicy Red, Manhattan Seltzer and seven tablespoons of Visine, just so we get out of here on time.

Uh, have you seen Quinn?
I-I want to make sure that I can, uh, get her and her wheelchair up on stage when she wins.

Well, she had a couple of cups of punch earlier, so I'd probably start with the little girls' room.

D-I-N-O-S-A U-R a dinosaur D-I-N-O-S-A That's what you are, ha.

Hello.

Hey, Quinn, Quinn, you in here?
You you can walk?
Yeah.

Isn't it amazing?
You're seeing me take my first steps.

So you-you you lied to us.

To everybody.

No, I mean, my legs are getting better, but I wanted it to be a surprise.

You know, for when I walk up there and and get my crown.

The crowd will go wild.

I really want this.

Yeah.

You may want this, but Rachel needs me, and and I picked you over her.

Do you know how stupid that makes me feel?
You have everything.

You're going to have your crown.

You're going to go to Yale.

Rachel has none of that.

And tonight, thanks to you, she doesn't even have me.

We're a shoo-in.

I need you.

No, you don't need me, okay?
I-I-I thought going through all that terrible stuff this year made you cooler, but no, you're still the same old Quinn.

All that matters is you.

Come on, stop!
Please.

Look, it's mandatory for the nominees to have at least one dance together.

I know you don't understand how much this means to me, but will you please just stay here for me?
Please.

Oh, my God.

All right.

Let the very first annual McKinley High Anti-Prom begin.

Oh, look, there's chocolates on the pillows.

We got room service.

Minibar!
Whoo!
Nice!
So, uh, what should we do now?
Duh play strip poker.

I brought condoms.

Becky, Blaine and I are gay, remember?
Never stopped me before.

Well, I mean, no matter what, it'll be better than prom.

Yeah!
Who wants to be in that smelly old gym, anyway?
Prom's a sucker's paradise.

Prom sucks!
Let's get wasted!
Whoo!
Becky, Becky, we appreciate your enthusiasm, but will you just keep it down with the shouting?
Keep your big honking nose out of it, Berry!
Oh, snap!
Oh snap!
So, I wouldn't mind watching a little TV.

Um, maybe some Bravo?
Dude, it's a hotel.

It's gotta be Skinemax.

We could put on a fashion show!
Yeah!
Let's go all Sound of Music and make some old-timey couture out of the drapes and bedsheets, huh?
Too gay!
I second that.

Well, I'd love to show you guys my prom dress.

I wouldn't want it to go completely to waste.

It's in my car.

I can go get it.

Worst anti-prom ever!
It's been said and done Every beautiful thought's been already sung And I guess right now here's another one So your melody will play on and on With the best of 'em First time we danced together like this was at last year's prom.

I remember.

And remember when I told you we were gonna get back together and you told me I was crazy?
Crazy.

That's 'cause you are.

Yeah, but you kind of love it.

And I want you to know, baby I, I love you like a love song, baby I, I love you like a love song, baby Looks like everyone's happy tonight.

I, I love you like a love song, baby And I keep hitting repeat- peat, peat, peat, peat, peat I, I love you like a love song, baby I, I love you like a love song, baby I, I love you like a long song, baby And I keep hitting repeat- peat, peat, peat, peat, peat Constantly, girl, you play Through my mind like a symphony There's no way to describe what you do to me You just do me What you do And it feels like I've been rescued Rescued I've been set free Set free I am hypnotized by destiny Destiny You are magical, lyrical, beautiful You are, and I want you to know, baby I, I love you like a love song, baby Just one dance.


Come and finish it with me?
Yeah, I will as soon as you stand up and show everybody how much you deserve this, how much you deserve to be Prom Queen Are you really doing this right now?
What, making you walk?
Make you stand up and show everybody how much of a crazy liar you are?
Yeah.

Come on.

Stand up!
What's going on, dude?
Did you know that she could walk, too?
You must have with all that physical therapy you've been giving.

Hey, just finish the dance with me!
Stand the hell up!
Come on!
What is wrong with you?!
Hey, hey, hey!
You forcing me to eject you from yet another prom, Hudson?
Not this time, Coach.

Good idea, Frumps.

What are you looking at, Jar-Jar Binks?
Touch those peanut M&M;'s, and I will end you.

This is a repeat.

It's the one with the passive-aggressive lesbian and the doggy care.

I wish Tabatha would take over this anti-prom.

Gosh, this sucks.

Yeah, well If you wanted to go to the prom, I would have gone with you.

I am not going to give into Brittany's insane ban on hair gel.

Freedom to use hair care products?
It's in the Bill of Rights.

Didn't the founding fathers all wear wigs?
You haven't seen me without an enormous amount of gel in my hair.

It's, it's really bad.

Finally, the room service is here.

I want my shrimp cocktail!
Hey, Becky.

Where's Rachel?
She's been in the bathroom for 45 minutes.

I'm guessing the runs.

All right, let's let the anti-prom fashion extravaganza begin.

Hi.

What are you doing here?
Well, I'll keep it simple.

I love you.

You're beautiful.

Prom sucks without you.

Prom sucks without all of you, guys.

This is the last t time we're gonna get to be together like this.

I want to dance with my fiancé, dance with my friends.

Well, I'll just pretend to be an iceculpture if Brittany sees me, and then she'll just pass me by.

So, you guys gonna come?
Not until I get my shrimp cocktail.

I'm good.

And you guys go ahead.

Come on, dude.

You're my wingman.

I'll go next year.

Come.

Are you ready for strip poker, Puckerman?
Socks count as one item.

I'm so glad you guys came.

Better late than never, right?
Come on.

Let's dance.

You're insecure, don't know what for No, sorry, Blaine.

I said no hair gel, remember?
I can totally smell it.

Let's go!
You can do this.

The way that you are is enough Everyone else in the room can see it Everyone else but you Baby, you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell You don't know, oh-oh You don't know you're beautiful If only you saw what I can see You'll understand why I want you so desperately Right now I'm looking at you And I can't believe you don't know, oh-oh You don't know you're beautiful, oh-oh That's what makes you beautiful Na, na-na-na, na-na-na, na, na Na, na-na-na, na-na-na, na, na Na, na-na-na, na-na-na, na, na Na, na-na-na, na-na Baby, you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell You don't know you're beautiful You light up my world like nobody else The way you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed But when you smile at the ground, it ain't hard to tell You don't know, oh-oh, you don't know you're beautiful If only you saw what I can see You'll understand why I want you so desperately Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe You don't know, oh-oh You don't know you're beautiful, oh-oh You don't know you're beautiful, oh-oh That's what makes you beautiful.

Suck on these, Puckerman.

Trip aces.

Crap.

I'm getting sharked.

Where'd you learn to play?
In the joint.

Well, I'm one losing hand away from an extremely awkward situation, so would you mind laying off a little bit?
I can't.

I'm too pissed off.

Why?
'Cause I didn't get nominated for prom queen like that girl in the commercial.

Coach Sue said I couldn't get the votes.

You really wanted that crown, huh?
More than anything.

It hurts, Puck.

Becky Jackson I'm putting some clothes on 'cause I have an idea.

Really?
Yeah, check it out.

We still haven't crowned a king and queen for the anti-prom, have we?
No, we haven't.

I'm gonna bust out my Kn*fe.

If you ask me, I think the anti-prom's the most important prom of all.

First, we need a king.

Nice.

And then now, we need a queen.

Hmm I hope I get it.

Becky Jackson I crown you the Queen of the anti-prom.

Take a look.

Oh, my gosh!
I did it.

I'm so happy.

Your Highness, what do you say we get out of here?
Sure.

My prince.

Hey, I got your text.

You have three minutes.

The voting has started, and I need to get out there and press the flesh.

Look, I owe you an apology.

I-I found out that you and Finn were campaigning together, and I kind of freaked out.

I got really jealous and irrational, I just, I should have been supportive.

Well, since I had no idea that was going on, it's pretty easy to forgive you.

So I'm glad we cleared this up.

Wait.

Do you not understand what you mean to me?
When we first met, you were everything I wanted to be: You were beautiful and popular, and you had Finn.

How the mighty have fallen.

No, you don't understand.

I still see you the same way, okay?
That's why I got so crazy.

Because I wasn't seeing the new Quinn.

The still-beautiful, but humbled and inspiring Quinn.

I, I've lost so much over these past few weeks.

And I honestly don't know what the hell I'm gonna do to do with my life.

But when I look back on my high school career the one thing, the one accomplishment that I'm gonna be so proud of is that I found a way to be your friend.

So I'm apologizing to my friend.

And I also want you to know that I voted for you for Prom Queen.

And I really think you deserve it.

Stop making out with Berry and get to the Spanish room, Quinn.

It's time to count the votes and declare me the winner.

Right.

Bye.

Good luck.

Drop that ladle, Cohen-Chang!
Ooh, I'm onto you, lady.

You're trying to spike my punch!
No, I'm not.

I'm just thirsty.

I'm dehydrated from all the crying.

Yeah, right.

That dress is hideous.

Becky Faye Jackson, you've done it!
You're at senior prom with a crown on your head, and a hot piece of booty on your arm.

And for once in my life, I don't mind everybody staring at me.

Game on, beautiful.

Born for this, Puckerman.

Becky, I don't care which dope we crown here tonight, you are truly the queen of this joint.

Thanks, Coach!
Oh, my God!
Is that a sn*per in the rafters?
Oh, I knew I should've done another security sweep.

I don't see anything.

Use your infrared glasses, Coach.

Good idea, Becky.

I don't see anything.

Dance with me, Puckerman?
Thank you for making my dream come true, my queen.

My count for king is the same as yours.

I don't get it.

How could Brittany have only gotten four votes?
This Dino Prom theme was a smash.

Well, maybe it has something to do with the fact that she's a girl.

Well, screw this.

I don't want to be queen if Britt isn't king.

Well, good, because my count for queen was the same as yours.

I won by one vote.

I won.

It's everything I've ever wanted and I don't feel any different.

Cool.

I mean, I guess you deserve to win, right?
What with being a crip and all.

You know, we really have had the dream high school careers.

Mega-popular, doing whatever we wanted.

Whoever we wanted.

You know, I'm really not surprised that you and I were the top two candidates.

Yeah.

Well, you know, it would be boring if we weren't so awesome.

Don't you want to leave this place having made a difference?
Oh, my dear God.

Don't make fun of the new kid with the bad 'fro.

It's hair-bullying.

That's not a new kid.

That's Blaine without hair gel.

Is it really that bad?
Yeah, you're Mr.

Broccoli Head.

It's not that bad.

Yeah, it is.

It's really bad.

And you made your point.

I abuse my power as president but to help save the prom, and to keep people from turning to stone when they look at you, I'll give you special permission to wear hair gel, immediately.

Quiet, please, children.

I'll be right back.

Thank you, thank you.

Don't you dare.

I love finally getting to see the real you.

The man without the product.

And I want everyone here to know just how proud I am of my brave, handsome, bushy-haired boyfriend.

Come on, Barrette.

First I have an announcement to make: There are reptiles living in McKinley toilets no more.

The family of snakes has been safely removed to the zoo, and they can life out their lives in the toilets there.

And now, this year's Prom Court: Nominees for the Prom King are: Finn Hudson Rick "The Stick" Nelson I love you, man!
And President Brittany S.

Pierce.

The nominees for Prom Queen: Missy Gunderson Santana Lopez (applause, whoopin and Miss Quinn Fabray.

I would like to invite last year's queen, sassy male student Kurt Hummel, to crown this year's winners.

And this year's Prom King is Hmm Mr. Finn Hudson.

Go, Finn!
And the winner for Prom Queen is Students, for the second year in a row, we have prom anarchy.

Receiving the majority of write-in votes, I would like to welcome on the stage Miss Rachel Berry.

Smile and breathe.

McKinley Titans, bow down to your new leaders!
And now first dance of this year's Senior King and Queen!
Watching every motion in my foolish lover's game Is this some kind of joke or something?
I mean, like Kurt last year, is someone going to throw pig's blood on me next, like in Carrie?
Look at me.

You're sexy, you're beautiful, you're an inspiration to every single person in this room, just like you are to me.

From where you began, to where you are now you're amazing.

Watching in slow-motion as you turn around and say You take my breath away Take my breath away Hey, are you really crying?
I just don't want it to end.

Prom night?
Everything.

This whole year.

I just wish it could go on forever.

You take my breath away Watching every motion in this foolish lover's game Haunted by the notion Somewhere there's a love in flames Praise!
It's a prom miracle.

Turning and returning to some secret place inside Watching in slow-motion as you turn my way And say You take my breath away My love Take my breath away, oh Away Take my breath away Never in a million years would I have thought that someone like me would win Prom Queen.

But if my friends believe in me enough to see me this way, then I don't know, maybe anything's possible.

Away Take my breath away My love Take my breath away
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