01x03 - Funeralia

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Flight Attendant". Aired: November 18, 2020 to current.*
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An American mini-series of a flight attendant who wakes up in the wrong bed, wrong hotel with a dead man and no recollection of what happened.
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01x03 - Funeralia

Post by bunniefuu »

- Okay, what was her name again?

- Miranda Croft.

Ugh, I Googled it, but that name has, like, 23 million hits alone.

I have Google alerts set up for Alexander Sokolov, Unisphere.

- That's not gonna be, like, a huge red flag if anyone ever checks your search history.

Okay, look, all we need is for this receptionist at Unisphere...

- Sabrina.

- To tell the FBI what she told you.

- Okay, well, what can I do?

- Please, please, just let me be the lawyer now, okay?

I will talk to Sabrina, and then we will go to the FBI together with this Miranda information.

- Move, move out of the way.

- By the time you get back from Rome, things might look very different, okay?

- All right, thank you.

I love you.

- So I begged the pilot to climb to 40,000, because that is what she's doing.

Like...

- Wow, that was a fun reaction.

So are you planning on doing the initial descent announcement sometime before we land?

- Okay, you know what?

This...

I'm the one who's annoyed at you.

Let's not forget that, Megan.

- Oh, right.

You mean when I called you out of concern and you lamented about your theoretical life spiraling into some crazy sh*t and then you hung up on me?

Yeah, I forgot all about that.

- Why'd you turn the lights off?

I just got an alert about your memorial service.

- It's at your family's house in Westchester.

It just feels so sad.

- Well, people gotta grieve.

You can turn the lamp off again if that helps.

I don't mind.

- Cassie!

- Yeah?

- What time are we going to la discoteca?

'Cause we are definitely going to la discoteca.

- Ooh, yes.

- Guys, you know what?

I'm not gonna go out tonight.

I'm a little bit tired.

I just...

- Wait, what are you talking about?

This is Rome.

We are in Rome!

- This new trend of you not going out is poor.

You are trending poorly, my friend.

- I don't blame you.

I'm just gonna drop something off with a friend and then grab some dinner.

- Sorry, do you have a friend in Rome?

- That's none of your business.

So, Cassie, since you're not going with Shane to that noisy, sweaty la discoteca...

- Oh, my God, it's amazing how lame it sounds when she says it.

- All right, guys, seriously, have fun.

I just really wanna be alone tonight, okay?

[soft music playing - Cassie.

Mamma mia.

- The usual, yes?

- Yes.

- Of course.

I didn't think you'd be in Rome this month.

I usually get at least a text.

- I know; I was...

I should have, but I've been really busy and very distracted and...

But I'm here now.

I was thinking maybe you could walk me back to my hotel.

You know, like, the "friend" part of "friends with benefits."

- You know, adults can be friends and sleep together without the cute name.

- Cassie?

Cassie, you said that you were staying in tonight, you big, fat liar.

- Hi.

- Who's your friend?

- Best friend.

Megan Briscoe, and this is my second glass of wine.

Actually, it's my third.

- That is quite a large glass.

- Pleasure to meet you, Megan.

- Yes, thank you, it's...

Oh, okay.

Oh, this...

I'm interrupting.

- No, it's fine.

- Okay.

It's kind of good, 'cause I wanted to talk to you anyway.

Cassie.

Cassie, I know you would be surprised to hear this, but...

I don't have a lot of friends.

- Wow, I'm surprised to hear you say that.

- Yeah, so I don't want you to be mad at me over this FBI thing, you know?

- Yeah, you know, that...

That wasn't great.

- And I'm so sorry.

It won't happen again.

I promise you.

And the calls...

I know I call a lot.

- It's okay.

- No, it's not.

I just...

I want you to know that I'm here for you, you know?

You're so glamorous, and I'm just...

Just want more than Oyster Bay, you know?

- Okay, first of all, I am not glamorous, okay?

Yeah.

Anyway, I'm sorry.

It's just, I've been keeping so many secrets.

It's good to talk to somebody about other things, you know?

- What do you mean, secrets?

- You are so bellissima.

- Sabrina Oznowich?

Hi, I'm Annie Mouradian.

I'm a lawyer with Davis & Carlisle.

- Oh, good for you.

Sorry, I really need to get to home.

- No, yeah... no, of course.

Look, I just have a quick question about a conversation that you had with Alessandra Ricci over drinks.

- I don't know her.

She looks fun, though, in, like, a sorority kind of way.

- It's an oddly keen observation.

Look, when you guys had drinks, did you discuss a woman named Miranda Croft?

- But I just said a couple seconds ago that we didn't get drinks.

- Right, yeah, you said that.

Look, Sabrina, you seem sweet.

Um...

it's a very bad idea to lie to me.

- Wait, I mean...

I mean, I do know her.

I mean, she had an emotional meltdown and broke an extremely important piece of art in the office.

But I never had drinks with her, and I don't know this...

Miranda.

Is there anything else?

Cool, okay.

I don't know.

- Ooh!

- Thank you for walking us back.

- Hey, it's the hotel.

Oh, this is so much better than the opera, Cassie.

- I think you're a little drunk-y.

- I can be drunk.

You have no idea what I can be.

- No.

Lovely, behaved woman, take your butt to bed.

Bye.

Ciao.

- Ciao.

- Ciao!

Ciao.

Okay.

- Ciao.

Be careful.

- I got it.

Buona notte!

- I guess Megan kind of h*jacked our night, huh?

- Oh, yes.

- Although I think it might be better.

- Better for your best friend?

- Okay, she's not my best friend.

Never mind.

Hey.

You know...

I thought I was in a place where we would do what we normally do, but...

I don't know.

I guess I met someone.

- You are a fun, kind, and... beautiful woman.

It had to happen one day.

Cassie, I'm...

Ciao.

- Any siblings?

- Yes.

Older brother.

- Nice.

- Lives in Denver with his family.

- Denver, huh.

- You?

- Only child.

Don't say you can tell.

Everyone always says they can tell.

I hate it.

- No, no, no, no, no.

I just think you act the way you do because you're rich.

- What?

- I would never say that to your face.

That would be so rude.

- I wish that I had siblings, someone else for my mother to focus her energy on.

Would've been great.

- Yeah, she's...

She's controlling.

- God, she hated my last girlfriend.

- I'm sorry, is that a challenge, or you just dropping a hint that you're single?

- What is it about you?

- I was thinking the same thing about you.

Also, I'd own your mom.

Annie, hi.

I know you're working.

I'm home.

Rome was so weird and frustrating.

Can you please call me back immediately?

I've gotta know what's going on with the...

Miranda thing, okay?

Love you.

Bye.

Hello?

Who are you?

What are you doing in the shower?

Where's Annie?

- She's getting fresh bagels.

I'm Max.

- Okay.

- I'm Annie's boyfriend, Max.

I'm not usually this naked.

You're Cassie, right?

- Yeah, but no, Annie doesn't have a boyfriend, so...

- Right, because of her weird rule about no labels in relationships?

- No, she just doesn't have a boyfriend.

- She does; she helped me out with some, like, legal issues, and we got close.

- I'm so...

legal issues, what?

- I'm good with technology, and rich people are kind of...

not.

Generally extortion.

You staying for breakfast?

'Cause she's only getting two bagels.

- Okay, I am so confused by what is...

- Okay, they didn't have chive, but I got scallion, which is, like, basically...

What happened?

- Well, I just met your naked boyfriend, Max.

- Yeah, no, I don't have a boyfriend.

- Oh, okay, yeah, sure.

- Label thing.

What can I do?

- Okay, listen, I'm in major crisis mode right now, but I do need to circle back and ask about this mysterious boyfriend I've never heard of.

- Yeah, that's Max.

- Yeah.

- He...

he's not my boyfriend, and that...

I feel like that kind of wraps up that discussion.

Now, can you just tell me, like, what is going on and why are you here?

- Listen, when I got back to my apartment today, my door was open.

- Cas, I told you not to leave that f*cking key above your doorway.

- No, this is not related.

That's just my hide-a-key.

No one knows where that is.

- It is 0% a hidden key when, like, half of Lower Manhattan knows where it is, so...

- Okay, I am f*cking serious.

This was scary.

Someone rummaged through my stuff.

Okay, things were moved just a little, but I could tell that it was...

- Wait, so someone, like, broke into your apartment?

- Yes.

Listen, could it be Miranda?

I know that sounds insane, but could she have followed me here from Bangkok and she's trying to send me some terrifying message?

- Who's Miranda?

Is that your stalker?

- Yeah, shutting it down back there.

Thank you.

- Okay, listen.

Have you spoken to Sabrina?

I need to know, because her story is gonna start getting me off the hook.

- So Sabrina claims that she's literally never heard of anyone named Miranda.

- What?

Oh, my God.

No way.

She's lying!

Look, you gotta call the FBI.

They need to question her about this.

She has to tell them the truth, right?

- Van White.

- This is Annie Mouradian, Cassie Bowden's lawyer.

- Yeah?

- We believe Sabrina Oznowich from Unisphere Capital has some information about this Miranda woman and her relationship to Alex Sokolov.

- Oh, we spoke to Ms. Oznowich.

Nothing of note.

Certainly nothing about this supposed Miranda person.

But if I was Ms. Bowden's lawyer, I'd be scrambling for alternative theories now too.

- Can you hold on for just a sec?

- Are you kidding me?

That's not really how...

- What...

what are they saying?

- Nothing.

- Annie.

- Shut up.

- Kendrick.

- It's Annie.

What's the latest on the Sokolov Bangkok m*rder case?

- Annie, you can't just call me up.

- Does your cousin's tenuous drug-related legal charge still require a lawyer, though, or...

- Bangkok PD found a shattered bottle.

They think it's the m*rder w*apon.

They're gonna reconstruct it, see if they can pull prints.

- We'll get back to you.

- Hey.

What?

- Um..

so they think they found the m*rder w*apon.

- Oh, my God.

The bottle, of course.

Of course they found the...

Oh, my God.

sh*t.

I've seen "Dateline." They zero in on one person.

That person is me.

I'm going to jail.

- You're not going to jail.

- Yes, I am.

I'm definitely going to jail.

- You're not gonna go to jail.

Um...

stop watching "Dateline." Look, I'm gonna report the break-in, and we'll see where that gets us.

And, um...

you're gonna stay here for a little bit, okay?

Just to be safe.

- Okay, thank you.

- Look, I'm gonna...

I'm just gon...

I'm gonna look into Miranda and Unisphere, and I'm just gonna keep digging.

And, um, it's...

It's gonna be fine.

- Annie's trying, but no one's gonna believe me.

I am so f*cked.

- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Stop this.

Stop this.

You can still find Miranda, right?

But it's just gotten a bit more complicated.

- Okay, but why is Sabrina acting like this?

If you dated her, then someone has to know...

Okay, check this out.

- I wish that I had siblings, someone else for my mother to focus her energy on.

Would've been great.

- Yeah, she's controlling.

- God, she hated my last girlfriend.

So my dating life was difficult.

Thanks for the reminder.

How is this helping?

- Okay, if your last girlfriend was Miranda, that means your mom can confirm she's real.

- How are you gonna get to my mom?

- Hey.

- Hi.

- Thank you for coming such last-minute.

You look fantastic.

- I think emotional support looks good on me.

- It does.

Here.

- Should we talk about the hat?

- What?

- It's a net.

- Just trying to be respectful or something.

- How did your friend die?

- Um, I...

he...

I'm not supposed to ask that.

- It's okay.

- I'm so sorry.

I've actually never been to one of these, so that's new territory for me.

- It's okay.

You're perfect.

Thank you for coming with me.

- Of course.

- That's all that matters.

Th...

Sorry, one second.

- Buckley?

Hey.

- Hey, how's it going?

- Yeah, you know, I don't remember putting your number in my phone.

- I did it.

I mean, you asked me to at the bar the other night.

- Okay, yeah, that sounds like me, actually.

- Cool.

Look, so I just was wondering if you maybe wanted to...

meet up at some point today if you're free.

- You know, I'd love to, but I have a training session at work.

Like, water landings and stuff.

It's a whole ordeal.

Can we rain check on that idea?

- Yeah, yeah, totally.

Just don't drown or anything, okay?

- Ha-ha.

Bye.

- Well, I'd love to know more about the water landings.

Look, he's super sweet.

I just don't wanna get...

Whatever.

Don't judge me today.

I can't.

- Well, should we catch a train?

- Let's go.

- Okay.

Are there boys on the train?

[soft pop music playing - Julian?

- Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Hi, a lot of these people came in after me.

Is my drink ready?

- What was the name?

- Megan.

- Are you sure it's not Mel Ann?

- Thank you.

- Always a pleasure to see you.

- Same here.

I'm sorry.

This is so exciting.

Corporate espionage.

- I know.

Shh.

- Now, did you get the flash drives?

- I did indeed.

All untraceable.

Well, untraceable for Long Island, that is.

- Wonderful.

So you'll just download the files we've requested off your husband's computer and pass the flash drive along to Mr.

Hak.

Well, why can't I just hand them over to you?

- Well, that's a beautiful idiom, but it's not an answer.

- Are you having reservations?

It is a shame the way that company treats your husband.

They just don't appreciate him, do they?

- Mr.

Ro, I don't have any issues with...

borrowing files from my husband's company.

I mean, it's just a facial recognition thing, right?

I mean, it's not like it's a big secret.

I just don't think I can do it today.

- No, don't do that to yourself, Mrs. Briscoe.

You are more than capable.

- Are you sure that no one is going to find out?

- Absolutely.

What's the worst that could happen?

If somehow things did get sticky, my company in Seoul will step in and help your husband, your entire family.

Because you are very special to us.

- Thank you.

You know what I'm gonna do?

I am going to text my husband and ask him to bring home his work computer so I can bid on a jadeite piece for my kitchen.

That will definitely work.

- f*ck!

- Uh-oh, what did the bad computer do now?

- Looking into Alex Sokolov and Unisphere and...

I mean, the place is f*cking...

It's squeaky-clean.

It's, like, "save the dolphins" clean.

The scrubbed image is f*cking suspect.

I mean, there's only so much that I can find.

You know, legally speaking, so...

Yeah.

That sounds hard for you.

That's really hard.

- Yeah.

- Maybe you need a massage.

- I'm not flirting with you right now.

- But if you were flirting, we'd both be flirting.

- I'm talking about hacking.

I'm talking about hacking, okay?

- Which I obviously cannot condone or even, you know, know anything about because...

Hypothetically, if I were to, you know, just accidentally drop this piece of paper on the floor...

- Then you'd be a litterbug.

It's not okay.

- So if you, obviously without my knowledge or express permission, hypothetically were to then, you know, pick it up and look into what was written on it, how long would that take?

- Probably 20 minutes.

Okay, okay, yeah, sure.

Cool, cool, cool.

- What?

- It's weird.

That guy was just on the train with us, and now he's here.

- Well, we were just on the train, and now we're here, so how is that weird?

- Also, he wants me, so there's that.

- Are you f*cking kidding me?

Who goes to the memorial service for a guy they slept with one time in a foreign country?

Kim, when you hear galloping, you think horses, not zebras.

- Why would you think that's a thing to say to me right now?

- 'Cause sometimes the right answer is the obvious one that's walking into that house right now in a stupid little hat.

- We're doing the legwork.

This is under Thai jurisdiction.

And we're gonna need more than your galloping to extradite a U.S. citizen.

- Okay.

How about the housekeeper's statement from Bangkok that Bowden was still in the room the next morning?

- And another employee saw her passed out on a bench on another floor at the same time.

Is she magic?

- Maybe.

- I'm sorry, what was that?

- When we find out she k*lled him, I'm gonna do a little dance.

- Oh, good for you.

That sounds fun.

- Honey, did you bring me to 3C's funeral?

- Actually, it's a... it's a memorial.

I think they do that when there's no body.

- That is not relevant.

Let me explain something.

How could you not tell me that we were coming here?

- Okay, I...

I...

I thought you would say no, and I needed someone to come with me.

- You thought right.

Cassie, I will not be rubbing shoulders with actual grieving pe...

These people are grieving.

- I'm sorry.

- I will not rub shoulders with actual grieving people like a sad tourist.

What I will do is leave you standing here with him.

Think about your life choices.

I need a drink.

Do they have drinks at memorials?

- Oh, my God.

Excuse me, have you seen Janet Sokolov anywhere?

Is she...

- No.

- Bet everyone here is telling stories about me if you're curious.

- Nope.

- Well, I am curious.

- Alex, please.

Focus.

I need to find your mom.

- If I dated Miranda, there should be dozens of people here who know her.

So why would you bother my mom at my memorial service?

- There are 500 people here.

I'm supposed to walk up to each one and say, "Hey, do you know Miranda?"

- Good point.

It is a big house.

- Am I crazy?

I mean, who invites somebody to a memorial service as a plus-one?

It's just...

- b*tches, am I right?

What did you say?

Tell you something.

We don't call women b*tches, okay?

That is a phrased used for delinquent fuckbois and sometimes male politicians.

She is my friend.

She's confused.

What's your name?

- Michael.

- Michael?

With an M or...

- Michael.

- Yeah.

- It's nice to see you.

- Bill?

Bill, honey, are you there?

Honey?

Stupid f*cking dog.

- Dearest friends, family, and colleagues, your presence here means the world to Janet and me.

Um...

The first time Alex b*at me in a game of chess, he was so surprised, he assumed we'd made a mistake.

- Oh, my God.

I'm...

I'm so sorry.

I...

sorry.

- Sorry.

Sorry, sorry.

As I was saying, I told him on that day that it was his turn to start...

To start teaching me.

- Excuse me.

I know.

I apo...

I apologize.

I'm so, so sorry.

Why are you calling me over and over?

- You need to come over right now.

- I can't.

I'm at a...

I'm at a spin class.

- What the f*ck are you doing in Westchester?

- Oh, my God.

Okay, I'm...

I'm at Alex Sokolov's memorial.

- Jesus.

Okay, Cass, the Sokolovs own Unisphere.

Like, the whole f*cking thing, okay?

Max did some digging, and he had to dig very deep.

- Okay, well, did he find anything about Miranda?

- No.

Look, I need you to listen to me, okay?

The Sokolovs are laundering money for some very scary people.

I shouldn't say this, but some of these people are my clients, and when they need to, they get very, very, very violent.

Do you understand me?

I need you need to leave that house right now.

- Okay, I hear you.

I hear you.

You're worried about scary people.

But if I don't find Miranda, I will never sleep in my place again...

If I'm not arrested.

- Cass, please, just get out of that f*cking house.

- Okay, whatever.

I'm sorry.


I love you.

I have to go.

- Cass...

m*therf*cker.

She f*cking dies, I'm gonna k*ll her.

- Hey, it's Cassie.

I'll probably call you back.

- Hey, Cassie.

It's me, Megan Briscoe.

I don't know why I said that.

Of course you know who it is.

Listen, are we still bid buddies?

Because I really need to get on that Tokyo-Seoul route next month.

So if you don't wanna go to Asia, let me know.

I can always ask Jada.

Call me back.

Bye.

- Is this your father's wake?

- What are you doing here?

You can't be here.

- It is, isn't it?

Wh...

Look at you.

You're so young.

- What...

that's not how this works.

You...

get out of my childhood memories!

- Whoa, whoa!

- Yeah, I don't think of those things, so you can't think of those things!

- Whoa, whoa, Cassie, I didn't ask to be there.

It wasn't volitional.

- So what were you doing there?

- I don't know.

Why don't you tell me.

How about that?

Oh, Jesus Christ.

- What are you looking for?

- A beer?

But aren't you, like, ten?

- Oh, my God, lay off.

It's a light beer, okay?

It's practically flavored sparkling water by adult standards.

- Your brother has the right idea.

- Yeah, well, you've never met him.

Excuse me.

I'm so sorry!

Oh, my God.

f*ck off, Alex.

My...

my dad only used to give me beer.

That was my first sip of hard alcohol.

I...

My God, I'm so sor...

I didn't mean to intrude.

- Then don't.

We can stand here quietly.

At least I know I can.

- You know, I only met Alex briefly, but...

I've never known anyone like him.

- He was generous.

More generous than I ever am.

Who knows where he got that?

I used to think he was born into the wrong family or some nurse switched him at birth.

You know that can happen.

- I used to think that of me and my brother growing up.

We should not have been in the same family.

But I guess you can't choose those things.

- Janet, you have a call.

Upstairs.

- I'm so sorry to do this right now, but I have to ask you a question.

It's about Alex's last girlfriend.

- What about Fiona?

- Sorry, Fiona?

I don't...

No, no, I'm talking about Miranda.

Miranda Croft?

- What an absurd...

My son never dated Miranda Croft.

Where did you get that...

Never mention that name to me again.

- So you were never even together?

- Or my mom's lying.

- Did you see her face?

She's telling the truth.

If you never even dated Miranda, then what the f*ck is going on?

- I can't speak to those particular concerns, but I was just accosted by a strange woman asking questions about Miranda.

Whatever else is going on, I will not let Victor, Miranda, or anyone else at Lionfish use my dead son as a scapegoat.

Where are the Lionfish files that Alex left here?

- I shredded the documents in your office this morning.

- All right, let's go back down.

- Hey, it's Cassie.

I'll probably call you back.

- Straight to voice mail.

f*ck.

- You're acting like she's about to be k*lled or something.

- That's not helping.

That's, um...

Look, I told her to call me in an hour, and it has been way longer than an hour.

And, you know, if she says the wrong thing to the wrong person there, then that, you know...

That...

f*ck.

Yeah, you know what?

I'm gonna...

Yeah, I can...

I can just call one of our clients, and I can ask them to just put in a call to the Sokolovs, you know, just in case, like, "Cassie Bowden, "harmless flight attendant, fixated on Alex, isn't that cute?" And my boss is gonna be furious, but, like, I can help, so...

- She might be totally fine.

- You really wanna go out on a limb for her?

- I mean, she's my best friend, Max, so yes.

- Best friend?

Cassie?

We basically live together, and I just met Cassie, so she can't really be your best friend.

- I'm, uh...

I'm s...

I'm sorry, you live here?

- All my stuff's here, so...

- Oh, okay.

So the totality of the things that you own are a toothbrush, two T-shirts, and a computer?

- You know I'm ready to unpack your commitment issues whenever you feel like it's that time.

- Look, if you wanna talk about Cassie, we can talk about Cassie.

It's, like, people have different types of friendships.

I don't care how it looks.

I'm making the call.

- Give it to us.

- Bowden's behavior has been erratic.

- Erratic how?

- She's been drinking heavily, she's made herself a recurring public spectacle, and she destroyed a tower of cucumber sandwiches.

Oh, I did see her go upstairs with Janet Sokolov.

- Maybe she did know Alex before.

- Can someone kindly explain to me why a federal battalion is camped outside my house taking photographs?

- We didn't mean any disrespect.

We're just trying to do our job.

- And I'm trying to find out why your pre-owned sedan is leaking oil on my immaculate drive.

Oh, do you think I should wait and ask at your son's memorial service?

That's how we communicate, right?

Now, I'll invite you all to leave.

- Do you know a Cassandra Bowden?

- Yeah, if I were a paper shredder, first thing I'd do is, I'd probably stop talking to myself.

Alex.

- Whoa.

Most people get pictures.

I have paintings.

- Yeah.

A lot of them.

Okay, focus.

Come on, paper shredder.

f*ck.

Oh, Mr. Sokolov, I'm so sorry for your loss.

I got a little bit turned around when I walked upst...

- You're a friend of Alex's?

- I'm actually not...

I'm not really a...

I'm not really a friend, just a...

I actually only knew him for a day.

Well, 12 hours, really.

It was actually just one evening.

But that evening was spent having se... making love twice.

Well, there's the infinity pool, so actually three times.

- I'm sure you can see yourself out.

- Yup.

- Here we are again.

Would you care to explain why you're in my house?

- Don't mind her, dear.

She's just one of Alex's good-time girls.

- Don't be stupid, Edward.

This girl was inquiring about Miranda.

Now she's upstairs snooping around.

- I actually have legitimate reasons for both of those things.

- Yes.

You're one of Victor's incompetent field mice.

- Victor?

Who?

- Oh, cut the theatrics.

- No, I'm a...

I'm a flight attendant.

Really, I'm...

I'm...

yeah, in the...

you know.

I have a badge.

I could show you.

It's got a little plastic thing, but it...

sorry.

Let me just grab it out of my...

- You really don't know what you've walked into, do you?

- Um...

- Wait.

- So your family's terrifying.

- Maybe they're better when their son didn't just die.

- Okay, they're not hanging out in libraries with g*ns because their son just d*ed, sorry, Alex.

Those are your parents.

You worked at Unisphere.

Are you associated with these people?

- It seems as if you're free to leave.

Unless you prefer to stay.

I don't...

I don't even know how this happened.

I am so sorry for your loss, really.

- Come on, let's go.

Just...

quiet.

- Gonna pull my arm out of the socket.

What is wrong with you?

Where are we going?

I didn't even wanna come here in the first place.

- Oh, please, I saw you liaisoning with the cater-waiter; I think you're okay.

- Liaisoning...

liaisoning?

That's a word, "liaisoning"?

That's a lot of judgment coming from a person who just crashed a memorial service.

What are you doing?

What is this?

This is a bag of trash.

You're a trash lady?

- Shut up.

Quiet.

- You...

you're hoarding?

What are you doing?

Yes, yes, I liaised with a man named Michael, a beautiful cater-waiter who's taking me to tacos in Bushwick on Saturday.

I don't know where Bushwick is, but it's gonna be f*cking magical, I'll tell you that.

- A magical taco Bushwick connection, wow!

- Maybe that's what happened with you and 3C and your magical night in Bangkok that you keep saying didn't happen.

Is there some other reason that we are here fully f*cking interloping on his actual grieving family?

- Shane.

- You wanted to go, I'm going.

- Shane.

- Get into it.

- I'm sorry.

Okay, you're right.

You're absolutely f*cking right.

I should not have come here.

I shouldn't have brought you here.

I just...

I thought it was the right thing to do, okay?

I thought it was important.

I did; I thought it was important, okay?

I wanted to clear my...

I wanted to clear my head of this horrible, horrible tragedy, but I didn't do that.

I just made a f*cking fool of myself in there 'cause I'm a mess.

I'm a f*cking mess.

I'm sorry.

Look, it doesn't matter.

No one in there even knows who you are, so let's just go.

It's fine, It's not the end of the world.

- Listen, you cannot tell anyone that I came here, okay?

It's f*cking crazy.

I know that now.

I'm sorry.

- I can keep a secret, Cassie.

Let's go.

Come on.

- Okay, okay, she's alive.

- What?

- Okay, okay.

- Okay, great.

- I'm gonna just m*rder her myself when I get the chance.

It's just like, she stops answering my calls and my text messages, and she scares the f*cking sh*t out of me.

- Okay.

So was that...

well, the favor you called in even necessary?

- Uh, yeah.

I mean, she got out in one piece, so...

f*ck, I don't know.

Maybe, but...

- It's great.

It's great.

You pulled some strings and you bailed out a friend.

Good job.

Your reward is some ramen.

- Right.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Max, that call that I made, my...

my boss is literally gonna have my head on a stick.

- I would be more worried about my payment.

- Your payment?

- My payment.

- For what?

- I believe I...

I believe I sent you an invoice for investigative services rendered.

- Oh, yeah?

- Yeah.

And I would like to be paid.

- Okay.

How would you like to take your payment?

- Well, I worked for, like, 20 minutes.

- I'm trying to think what you could do for, like, 20 minutes.

- What I could do for 20...

- 20 whole minutes.

- 20 whole minutes.

I don't know.

What could it be?

- I'm gonna figure it out.

- Let's get some ramen.

- Okay.

- Sir, where is the bar car on this train?

- Sorry, it's not that kind of train.

- It's not that kind of train.

- Hi, I'm Miranda.

- Miranda.

- f*ck.
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