03x03 - Part III

[bunniefuu]

Hey.

Hi.

I'm sorry.

I know I'm not easy to be with right now.

I'm just... trying to figure things out.

Figure what out?

Everything, I guess.

You think maybe, um, what you're going through is about the baby?

Becoming a father?

You know, all that sh*t with your dad, and then your mom passing.

And it's all got to be coming up.

I think you should talk to somebody.

Do you believe in God?

Do you really believe in some higher power who has some grand design?

I want to, but... do you feel like you know why we're here?

Or what happens when we die?

We don't.

It's all a total mystery. We don't know anything.

But in spite of that, we're going to have a child?

We're going to bring a baby into this f*cked-up existence that we don't even understand?

And then at some point, break it to them that they're going to die.

That they have no choice.

Why would we do that to our child?

Jamie, we are having a baby to have more love in our lives.

Or are we doing it because we're scared of dying, and we feel like this will make our lives have some kind of meaning?

Like a spiritual Band-Aid.

We feel better, but the child still has to face death alone.

We just kick the can down the road.

So, uh, what are you trying to say?

You don't want to have our baby?

I am giving birth... in days.

Jesus Christ, you don't get to do this. Not now.

It's not like I'm choosing to do this.

You are choosing.

You know who did not have a choice?

My dad.

My dad, who hauled cement 60 hours a week in Jamaica for sh*t.

He didn't even have time to think.

You, this... this is privilege.

Don't. Don't put that on me right now.

That's not fair. Life's not fair.

You still got to pull it together and deal.

What? So I don't get to have a moment because I'm white?

You're walking away? We're talking.

No.

We're not talking.

We will talk when you get some help.

Oh, hey. Oh...

It's you.

I thought you were that policewoman.

You spent the night?

Most of it, I guess.

Oh, that's kind of you. Yeah.

I at least slept a few hours knowing that someone was out here.

I brought this for whoever.

I was a photographer at first, so I like to sh**t a lot of reference.

Some models even sit for me, which is nice.

Always men?

Mostly.

For some reason, I see them more clearly.

He looks familiar.

That's Tom from the Gulf station.

Oh.

Ooh, uh... and...

Nick Haas and Jamie Burns, they never modeled for you?

I wouldn't forget that, no.

And you never met them outside of work?

I keep asking myself that.

That's what's been keeping me up at night.

No. It's just hard to believe that they'd dig a grave on your property for no reason.

Well, what did Jamie Burns say?

He says he doesn't know anything about it.

He was in the car.

That doesn't necessarily mean that their motives were aligned.

What does it mean?

Yeah.

You keep looking at me like you think I'm hiding something.

It's just... there has to be a reason.

I agree, and I-I don't exactly feel comfortable sitting here waiting for the guy, Jamie Burns, to come back and finish what he started.

You don't have someone you could stay with for a while?

I have deadlines. This is where I work.

I can't just uproot everything.

Well, don't you have some kind of security system here?

You got cameras or something, right?

I have an old shotgun in the shed.

Well, you ought to have some kind of security anyway, right?

I mean, your paintings... you get a pretty good price for them.

Oh, you've been researching me.

I'm working a case, so...

sh*t.

Excuse me, sir.

You're kind of taking up two spots.

You can fit.

All right, one.

Very good.

Tickets, please.

Thank you very much.

You got a problem, bro?

What the hell?

f*ck this.

Whoa, there you are.

You're okay?

Yeah, yeah, fine.

Just a little bit of sciatica.

It comes and goes.

Ah, yeah. Yeah, my dad had that once.

Got laid up for months.

You got anything for the pain?

Pills make me too drowsy.

What do you got?

Forensics, they found fibers and hairs at the site.

You talked to Burns? Yeah, yeah.

He said he didn't know anything about a grave.

Think that's bullshit?

How long on the DNA?

A couple of days. I don't know.

Anything from college? Yeah.

Jamie left school mid-term on his own.

But he was in the middle of a disciplinary hearing.

Apparently, he att*cked his roommate.

Well, we should track that guy down.

I did.

He's a dermatologist.

He works in the city.

I'll have to head down there later today.

Oh, okay, good, good.

You want company?

Well, no, I'm fine.

I'm fine. Got you.

Yeah, who dreams of becoming a dermatologist, right?

Yeah, how much fun could that be?

Okay, don't forget to take a look at the early writings of Winston Churchill.

We'll go over that next time.

I'm so sorry, Mr. B.

I didn't want my parents to say anything.

I didn't even want to show them the letter.

But my mom was being like a crazy person...

It's okay. I'm so pissed at them.

I need to talk to you.

But not here.

Meet me at Three Brothers over on Lexington at 3:30.

Off-campus?

Um, well, I have model U.N. at...

You're skipping that. 3:30.

Okay, um... see you there then.

Jamie Burns.

Does he know that we're speaking?

I mean, is he going to find out?

I'm just trying to get some background information for context, so no.

Uh, well, when we were roommates sophomore year, everything was fine.

We were friendly, but not too close.

Just perfect roommate distance, you know?

So we re-upped junior year, and that's when he completely changed.

Why was that?

It was this guy he started hanging out with, Nick Haas.

He's a weird guy... dark.

Jamie kind of fell under his spell.

They were inseparable.

Jamie got really distant. He wouldn't speak to me.

And I'd catch him looking at me sometimes like he hated me. He ever thr*aten you?

No, not really.

But then, uh, one morning, it's maybe 6:00 a.m., I wake up.

I find him sitting on the floor covered in dirt, his hands bloody, just staring at the wall.

He wouldn't speak.

dr*gs? Something...

No, it felt different than that.

He... he seemed almost... too alive.

That was my limit.

I took some pictures of him to petition for a room change.

And, uh...

That's when he att*cked me.

For taking pictures?

No, at some point, I put my hand on his shoulder, like, to get his attention, and it was like a trip wire.

He started screaming, pushing me.

He took this damn lava lamp and cracked me over the head with it.

I had 22 stitches.

It really screwed up my year.

Pictures... you still have those?

Uh, yeah, somewhere.

I could find them and send them over to you if you like.

Great, great.

Appreciate the time.

Uh, Detective.

If you need someone to come in and testify against his character, I'll make the time.

What I'm trying to say is you're making a mistake.

I don't understand.

Emma, I know you.

I know how wound up you get about doing well.

I know you're taking Adderall to compete...

That's not true. I've seen you passing pills with Lisa. I know what you're doing.

It's just to help me focus. Really, I promise.

Look, I don't care... I shouldn't be punished for trying to do well. I don't care about the Adderall.

I don't care, okay?

My point is that going to Brown is only going to make things worse.

You're k*lling yourself to get good grades.

Going to an Ivy and meeting the right people... doing what everyone else is doing... it's a dead end.

But you've been telling me to go this whole time.

I was wrong.

Really wrong.

You just can't let other people tell you what to do.

But I chose Brown. Because you think you have to go.

Emma, think. God damn it.

You're a smart girl. Can you think bigger with me for just a second?

We are living on a giant rock.

We are flying through space, and no one knows anything.

School makes you think they have the answers, but they don't. No one does.

Well, if that's true, then I shouldn't believe you either.

You're right. You shouldn't.

I can't not go. I mean, my parents...

Screw your parents.

That's easy for you to say that.

You want to keep feeling the way you do now?

Stressed out and scared and never thinking you're good enough?

Look, I know you're unhappy.

I have watched you be unhappy for three years now.

Is that how you want to live?

You think you're finally going to get somewhere, arrive, but trust me, I did that, and you never get there.

You never feel like...

I'm sorry, I...

I should...

What? I'm sorry. This... this isn't fair.

I-I gotta...

I'm sorry.

God damn it.

Hi. Hi.

Oh, my God. You're right on time.

Contractions are about seven minutes apart.

We have time. Okay.

Hey. Hey.

Yeah. You okay?

Well, it feels intense, kind of like a gripping. But, yeah, I'm okay.

For now.

I'm happy.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Good, good. Yeah.

How do we keep the tub temp consistent?

Oh, hey.

Hey. You're here.

Brian's been here all afternoon.

I'd like him to stay if that's okay.

All afternoon? Y-you called him first?

He was home.

Right.

Okay, B.

Oh, okay, okay, okay. Okay, deep breaths.

Okay, here we go.

You're doing great.

Well, when is he free?

Should a ten-year-old be that busy?

No, I know.

I know. It's...

All right.

Just let me know.

_

_

Oh, oh, my God.

Oh, my God...

Oh, my God. It's a boy.

Oh, my God. We have a son.

We have a son.

Daddy, your honor here. Oh, yeah, yeah. All right...

Right here? Mm-hmm.

All right.

Hey.

Okay, okay, okay.

Well, you want to make sure that security techs install those varifocal lens cameras.

I don't know what that means, but I'll make sure I pretend to.

And you can get that emergency call button.

Mm. And keep it on your keychain.

I-I know this is designed to make me feel more secure, but it's not.

Well, it makes some of the rest of us feel better.

Well, that's something.

See this red oak would be a great camera position.

That's a healthy looking tree, isn't it?

Yeah, I'm not so lucky with my blue spruces.

I lost a bunch to needle cast last year.

I can help with that. I have a fungicide that will mitigate it.

I've never met anybody with a mitigating fungicide.

Yeah, it can help.

So this is you over here?

Going this way, it's all the way out to that aspen grove?

Yup, up to the road. Uh-huh.

Help me.

Thanks.

I didn't do very much.

You're pretty steady on your own.

Well, one of us had to make the first move.

Hun?

Hey.

You barely slept the last few nights.

Why don't you go lay down?

What if something happens and he stops breathing?

Babe.

Baby...

He is a champion, first-in-his-class breather.

Hey.

You just got to loosen up a bit or you're going to wear yourself out.

I'll just stay a bit longer, okay?

Okay, I think maybe five minutes...

Yeah, yeah, I got it.

I got it.

Okay. Yeah.

Hey.

Aw, yeah?

Package for you.

For me?

Yup, it's from Michigan.

Thank you.

Detective Ambrose.

What?

Huh? What's up?

DNA came in.

Jamie Burns is a match with the samples from the grave site.

Thanks.

Shh, I just got him to quiet down.

What are you doing here?

Leela needed to lie down for a bit, so I took over.

He's doing great.

I'll take him.

He just fell asleep. It's okay.

Just give him to me. Trust me, Jamie.

I know from personal experience.

Once you get him down like this, you just...

Give me my son, okay?

Okay.

Sure.

Come here, buddy.

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh!

You just won't leave me alone, will you?

I can't seem to.

You know, you can stop lying now because it's over.

I know what you did.

What are you talking about?

I know you were at the grave.

We got a DNA report that proves it.

This thing isn't going to go away.

So I was at the grave. What does that prove?

You lied to me.

I know that in college, you att*cked your roommate.

And I know that something happened that night between you and Nick that made you snap.

And I know that after the accident, you k*lled him.

You kept him from calling for help.

And then you wiped your prints off his cell phone.

That's true, isn't it?

It's manslaughter.

How do you even prove that?

What kind of evidence do you have?

You don't, do you?

I just want you to know I'm watching you.

Why do you care so much about this?

You broke the law.

That's not it.

Anyway, this whole thing is over now.

Is it?

I think you let Nick die because you didn't like that he had a hold on you.

But he still does.

Doesn't he?

I mean, assuming you're right, what would you do about it?

If you were me.

I'd accept the help I'm offered.

You mean confess.

Yeah.

Nick Haas, I remember well.

Brilliant young man. A bit eccentric.

You only find students of his caliber every once in a while.

He was with him, Jamie Burns.

He survived the accident.

He was also in your class.

Obviously didn't make as much of an impression on me.

Sorry.

His former roommate took this picture.

This is why I came here.

Übermensch.

From what I understand, it's Nietzsche.

It means some kind of Superman.

A bit reductive in translation, but yes, that's right.

The highest form of man.

And Nick and Jamie would have covered Nietzsche in your philosophy seminar.

Many disaffected young men take to Nietzsche.

It's usually just a phase.

Pretty strong stuff from what I've read.

Übermensch ignoring morality.

No, that's not quite right.

The Übermensch creates his own morality.

Nietzsche contends that our modern ways have led us to lose our faith.

God is dead.

It's up to the Übermensch to forge new values to live by.

It's a challenge, one that requires will and discipline.

And if somebody were to rise to that challenge?

Ostensibly, you conquer fear.

Live at a higher level than common man.

Discover the truth of existence.

That's probably what appealed to these two.

So you become your own God.

You try.

But there are pitfalls.

Such as?

The temptation towards elitism.

Belief in one's self-created superiority.

h*tler used Nietzsche to justify the Holocaust, for instance.

That's a bit of a slippery slope.

Nietzsche warned of it himself.

"If you gaze long enough into the abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you."

Emma Hughes's parents are livid.

Isn't that their resting state?

I had to talk them down off a cliff.

They want to take this issue to the Trustees.

What did you say to Emma?

What did they say to you?

Well, apparently she's questioning whether or not she wants to go to college at all now thanks to you.

Maybe they should listen to their daughter.

What did you say to her?

I encouraged her to think independently.

Isn't that what we do here?

Jamie...

What is going on with you?

I just, I don't understand...

I'm only trying to help her.

No, you're deliberately sabotaging her.

Who do you care about?

Really. Is it Emma? Or your job?

I'm pulling Emma out of your class.

That's not going to help with anything.

Her parents have asked that you not communicate with her again, and I think it's a good idea.

Well, f*ck you then.

Excuse me?

We may have been colleagues before I became your boss, but you cannot speak to me that way.

Are we done?

Yes, I think we are.

For the moment.

Oh, oh, that's great.

That's great, and how are we doing on inventory?

Did you place that order?

Great. Oh, yeah...

Attaboy.

Dream away, little guy.

Dream away.

He looks just like you.

Give him to me. No, please.

He needs to learn.

Give him to me.

Hey.

Hey, what's going on?

Take him.

Is he okay?

Jamie.

Hi, baby. Okay, okay.

Anything good?

Nah, still working. Yeah.

Michigan VA Home.

Something from your old man?

Yeah. Personal effects.

Oh, I didn't know.

Oh, sh*t, Harry. I-I'm sorry.

That's okay.

I mean, I know you weren't close, but, you know, still.

Your father.

Barely.

Anyway, hey, condolences, man.

Uh... yeah?

Detective Ambrose, you got a Jamie Burns here for you.

Looks pretty upset.

Okay.

Okay.

Easy. Just take it easy.

Yeah, it's just, I'm trying to hold it together, all right?

I really am, I am. Good.

But what? What is it?

What the hell are they talking about in there?

Jamie. Okay.

Is anybody hurt? No, no, I just...

I was... I was holding my baby...

And?

You were holding your baby, and?

Help me. Please help me.

I will, I will.

But you got to tell me what's going on.

Captain, I'm just going to escort Mr. Burns for a consultation at St. Emilia's Hospital.

Okay, sure.

I'll catch up with you tomorrow.

Great.

And what happens after that?

The doctors are going to ask you a few questions.

We can at least get you something to calm your system down.

I'm so f*cked.

No, you're not.

You have a child now.

You're going to have to get better for him.

Hey.

It's like Nick infected me.

I didn't want it, but now I can't get it out of me.

You can do this.

A step at a time.

Right over here.

We need some security, but it's got to be quiet and at a distance.

A thr*at to himself or to others?

Both.

We need to detain him as soon as possible.

I'll tell the doctor.

Hopefully, we won't have to wait too long.

You're doing good.

What's going on?

I don't know, but... those guys, they get 15 bucks an hour to look at their cell phones.

Jamie Burns? All right.

You're doing the right thing. Come on.

You can wait here until we're finished.

No, he can stay. I want him to.

All right.

So I assume you're aware of your rights and that I can't hold you here unless I deem you a thr*at to yourself or others.

Hold me? You mean involuntarily?

That's only in extreme cases when someone's suicidal.

Right. People who have trouble controlling themselves. That sort of thing.

Okay then.

Just need a few boring details to start.

So, uh, Jamie. Is it James?

James. James.

Date of birth?

November 5th, 1981.

And you live at 325 Washington Avenue?

Yeah.

And the reason you're here today is because you've expressed a concern about your mental well-being.

I guess so.

Why are you concerned?

I...

Try just telling me how you feel.

I have this feeling all the time, like I'm trapped.

Like there's this big thing looming over me and I'm the only one who can see it.

Can you describe what the thing is?

It's like...

The fact that we're alive.

That we're going to die.

You ever hear voices in your head?

No.

Any hallucinations?

Seeing things that aren't there?

Sometimes I imagine things.

You know, like daydreams.

Like daydreams or something more real?

He's not schizophrenic.

Why don't you let me do the evaluation, Detective?

Have you had any suicidal thoughts?

I've thought about it.

But I can't do that.

Why not?

Because then you're just avoiding pain.

And pain is the gateway.

That's what my friend used to say.

So you feel you can control those impulses.

Well, you think you can until you can't.

Isn't that right?

So you don't feel you can control those impulses?

No, I'm saying that's a stupid question.

You ever have thoughts of hurting others?

If I answer yes, what will you do?

You'll keep me here against my will?

Is that what this is about?

This is about getting you the help that you asked for.

That's all. Is it?

Have you had urges to hurt others?

Have you ever held a baby?

Yeah, you know the feeling when you have him in your hands and you feel the weight there, this helpless, fragile thing.

And you get this jolt of fear because you know you could drop him.

You could just let him go, let him break on the floor.

The possibility is right there, so close.

And you feel this dread, like there's some part of you that you can't control that will drop him just to relieve you.

Just to make it go away.

You know that feeling, don't you?

We all do.

You should lock us all up.

Jamie, just... Hey.

Jamie. Don't, Jamie.

What the hell was that?

You trying to get me locked up?

That's how you help me?

You're not going to figure this out on your own.

Let's go someplace and talk.

You and me.

Just you and me.

Nick was right.

Jamie.

Jamie, hey, hey...

Jamie. God... sh*t!

Ah...

How'd it go?

Couldn't hold him.

He took off into the woods.

What? What do you mean?

He just ran off.

He's not stable.

We got to post somebody at Sonya Barzel's place.

And I need an emergency warrant on his cell phone right away.

But we can't get a warrant that fast.

We have to. He's out there.

He's going to do something.

We have to find him.