03x04 - Haunt-a-Rooney

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Liv and Maddie". Aired: July 2013 to June 2016.*
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Follows Identical twins as they navigate life which includes dealing with their parents that work at their high school.
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03x04 - Haunt-a-Rooney

Post by bunniefuu »

Hello, Stevens Point!

It's Johnny Nimbus and it's Halloween here at Ridgewood, so we're exploring the freaky-deaky underbelly of Wisconsin right here on Nightmares with Nimbus.

And I'm here with senior Maddie Rooney.

Hey Maddie, let's hear your best scaredy-cat scream.

Uh, no can do, Johnny, on account of I do not get scared.

Ever.

Wow.

Well, that's good because here at Senior Scare School, the seniors scare the middle schoolers and not vice versa.

Yeah.

And I have been waiting three years to scare these middle schoolers.

And I'm talking to you, Parker.

Boo!

Scared me.

Even tinkled a bit.

You can't scare Dr.

P, Maddie!

He fears no one!

I mean, 'ol Johnny looks great!

Uh, Reggie, Maddie's no joke.

When I was little, she scared me into giving her all of my Halloween candy.

Ooh, that's cold.

How'd she do that?

Well, she said if I didn't, then I'm be haunted by a Scottish demon called the Goomery Goo.

That's a dumb thing to be afraid of.

You're afraid of balloon animals!

- Isn't everybody?

- No!

Only you!

So our school has put together the scariest Senior Scare School ever.

Well, the scariest thing I see is a lack of options at the snack table!

Oof!

The celery has got me!

Oh, this is how the gypsy said it would end.

Okay, Willow.

You can let him go.

Willow?

Seniors rule!

"Oh.

it's got me!

"The celery has got me!" That's it!

Show's over.

Maddie Rooney, you just ruined - Nightmares with Nimbus!

- Ooh.

I'll make you pay for this if it's the last thing I do.

Ooh.

- Boo!

- Aah!

Dangit, Maddie!

It's so dumb.

Hey guys, please stop laughing.

Oh, sorry, it's just Johnny Nimbus is so dumb.

Johnny Nimbus is dead.

What?

Yeah.

It's on the news right now.

He was covering the closing of a toilet factory, and a forklift dropped a port-a-potty on him.

Oh.

Oh, poor Johnny.

Death by doodie.

Oh, look, look.

They're running a tribute of Nimbus highlights.

Hellooo, Stevens Point!

Hellooo, Stevens Point!

Buenos dias, Punto de Stefano!

This is Johnny Nimbus signing off.

Did he ever get the weather right?

Not once.

All right, here is your autograph, Mr. Zombie.

I made it out to just like you asked.

Oh, please watch Voltage!

To promote my new TV show, Voltage, I got to go to New York City to be on Jimmy Fallon.

I k*lled it in my lip-sync battle.

I begged and I whined until Liv agreed to take me with her to New York.

I really wanted to go to the Central Park Spooktacular and debut my greatest Halloween costume ever.

See, it's me as a cat wearing a Joey t-shirt.

It's ironic, it's awesome, and I'm never taking it off.

Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo I hope the Spooktacular scares me to death nine times.

See, I'm a cat, so I have nine lives.

Right.

Yeah.

Yeah, I get it.

Why don't you go get your haunted house on?

Mostly because your freakishly large cat eyes are creeping me out.

If they're creeping you out, you can always just look at Joey.

This is the best costume ever!

See ya.

Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo Why Mr.

Wolf what big ears you have.

All the better to hear you with my Liv!

Holden!

Hi!

You're in New York City and you're dressed as the Big Bad Wolf.

And you're in New York City dressed as Little Red Riding Hood.

Look at us!

We're living a fairy tale!

So what are the odds that the guy that I like, but have been avoiding because he dated my friend Andie would show up in New York on Halloween at the same event wearing a costume from the same fairy tale as me?

Apparently 100%.

Wow.

Um, so so what brings you to New York?

I'm heading to Grandmother's house.

No, literally.

My grandmother lives on 86th and Amsterdam.

Oh Cool!

Uh, well great to see you.

Actually, it's really kind of awkward to see you.

Um the last time that we were together, you said some things, you know, sort of like "Hey, Liv!" and like, you know, "What's up, Liv?" and "I'll wait for you as long as it takes, Liv.

" You know Yeah about that.

Um I didn't mean to make things awkward between us.

Can we just hang out as friends?

Huh.

Yeah.

I guess maybe we could do that.

I mean, we were friends before all of this, right?

- Right.

Yeah.

- Yeah.

- Oh, yeah.

So right.

- Yeah.

Back-to-being-friends hug?

- Yeah.

- Yay!

No.

Back-to-being- friends handshake.

Yeah, being-friends handshake.

Now, what is going on, Pete?

We've had, like, three trick-or-treaters.

Well, we're handing out tongue scrapers.

We're that house.

Oh, here's one!

- Trick or treat!

- Oh!

Well, hello, Evan.

Aren't you just the cutest little hot dog?

Actually, I'm a veggie dog, the healthy alternative.

Well, why aren't you at Senior Scare School with Parker and the others?

Scaring people on purpose?

That isn't my cup of herbal tea.

Well, I'm glad you came.

We haven't had many trick-or-treaters.

That's probably because your house has a terrible rating on The Treat b*at.

What's The Treat b*at?

It's an app that rates all the neighborhood houses based on the treats they give out.

Let me see that.

You've got a two smashed pumpkins rating.

And a lot of rude comments that I wouldn't recommend reading.

- Told you, Karen.

Everyone hates us.

- Eh Anyhoodle, trick or healthy treat!

Oral hygiene device?

Wow, Mrs.

Rooney, even I think this is lame.

Well, I just don't want to be promoting tooth decay!

And I don't want to be the house with the worst rating on Treat b*at!

Might I suggest a happy medium?

Something healthy trick-or-treaters will love, like prune pops.

Senior Scare School is ours.

Must.

Get.

Snacks.

Oh, no!

I hope a hand doesn't pop out and grab me.

Balloon animal!

Reggie, be cool!

Be cool!

The Goomery Goo!

We just Goomery-gotcha!

Yes!

Say it, middle schooler.

Fine.

I was scared.

Well done, old-timey pilot lady.

I'm Amelia Earhart.

'Cause she was an inspiring female role model.

No.

'Cause they never found her body, and that's scary.

How did you know I was terrified of balloon animals?

Uh, isn't everyone?

See, Dr. P?

It's locked.

Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

That's really weird.

This door is, like, never locked.

All right, you already scared us.

You can stop.

That isn't us.

Channel Four microphone?

That looks like a Nimbus mic!

Why is it wrapped in toilet paper?

And why do I feel a sudden chill?

All right, you don't think the ghost of Johnny Nimbus is haunting us, do you?

Okay, stop.

There's gotta be a logical explanation.

I have a logical explanation for this.

Johnny Nimbus is haunting us!

Johnny Nimbus is haunting us.

Johnny Nimbus is haunting us!

Okay, so there is no way that we are being haunted by Johnny Nimbus.

- Runaway toilet paper is a message!

- Yeah!

He's coming to wipe us out!

Maddie, when you embarrassed him on TV, Johnny did say he was gonna get even with you.

"If it's the last thing I do do do.

" Wait, so he's only after Maddie?

Phew.

The pressure's off.

Where's the chip dip?

Don't worry, Maddie.

I've got a way we can find out for sure.

I'm not worried.

I never was.

We'll ask Johnny by summoning him from beyond the grave.

What?

Willow, they're out of chip dip.

This line is taking forever.

Well, I could huff and puff and blow this house down.

Cyd!

Cyd, are you seeing what I'm seeing?

I'm a bunny, Shelby.

I eat tons of carrots, so my eyesight's impeccable.

- No.

- It's Liv Rooney from Voltage.

Liv Rooney's here?

Where?

The gossip blogs will pay a ton of money for a sh*t of her.

She's over there.

Liv Rooney!

I'm your biggest fan!

You do it all, girl!

Thank you.

Oh, perfect sh*t!

Bingo and cha-chingo!

That sh*t is gonna be so great.

It's so romantic.

Oh, no.

We're we're not a couple.

Really?

Because it totally looked like you were about to kiss.

Yeah.

Super couple-y.

Oh, no!

But we're we're so friend-y.

Liv, if he publishes that photo, Andie could see it.

And think that we're sneaking behind her back to have a super secret NYC smoochfest!

He's gotta delete that photo.

Um sorry.

Excuse me!

Hi, excuse me.

Hi, Mr. Photographer Man.

Um, is there any way that you could delete that photo that you just took?

Just because we don't want anybody to see it.

Whoa.

That means it's worth even more.

Thanks for telling me.

You're all right, Liv Rooney.

No, that's So he's not gonna delete it.

We're gonna have to find a way to delete it ourselves.

Sounds like trouble.

I'm in.

You're kinda dark and weird for a fluffy bunny.

She gets me.

Here ya go.

Just like a cake pop.

Except they're healthy!


No chocolate, no sugar, and not as sweet, but just as fun prune pops!

Well I am so glad you decided to hang out with us, Evan.

Oh, our Treat b*at score has to be way up now.

Wrong.

It's dropped all the way to six smashed pumpkins.

Let's give the kids what they want!

You know what?

That app lies.

The kids love those prune pops!

You know what?

They emptied the whole bowl.

Oh.

Fine.

Give them the candy.

It's like I always say, Mrs.

Rooney.

If you can't b*at 'em, silently judge 'em.

Okay, we'll talk to the ghost of Nimbus by playing "Johnny, Johnny, Are You There?" Sorry, I'm already too busy playing "Parker, Parker, This is Dumb. " How does this work?

Okay, we ask yes or no questions, and his spirit will move the pencils From beyond the grave.

Here it goes.

Johnny, Johnny, are you there?

It said yes!

He's here!

Johnny, Johnny, are you angry?

He's angry!

Okay, please.

You're blowing on it.

He's not!

This is real.

Johnny, Johnny, it's me, Willow.

Will Joey ever admit that he loves me?

Will Chillow ever happen?

What was that?

It was the pencil moving towards yes!

You bumped it!

Okay, you guys, can you just knock it off?

I mean, we actually don't have time for this nonsense.

Let's just figure out a way to get out of here.

And also, oof, what is that awful smell?

P p p p p port-a-potty!

It's the port-a-potty that squashed Nimbus!

All right, is this flash-mob thing gonna happen?

Yes.

So, I have rounded up some of the Voltage fans here at the Spooktacular and with their help, we can distract the photographer and delete the picture.

And if we fail, we will accidentally hurt Andie and make an enemy out of a girl with a blowtorch.

So let's just sh**t for the first one.

- Yeah.

- That's a good idea.

All right!

The music is ready.

I can't believe I'm on an adventure with Liv Rooney.

I'm excited too, but able to contain my emotions.

Okay let's do this.

DJ, drop the b*at!

We're in a flash-mob with Liv Rooney.

Will you take a pic of us?

Yeah, sure.

Why not?

Oh, no.

Use her camera.

Ah.

Got it.

No, I think I blinked.

Do it again.

Definitely got it.

Thank you.

You're the best.

- Celebratory handshake!

- Yes.

Okay.

Let's get out of here!

Why won't these doors open?

It's coming!

We gotta get out of here before the haunted port-a-potty gets us!

It's alive!

Alive!

Here's Johnny!

I told you, Maddie, I'd make you pay if it were the last thing I do!

- No!

No!

- Now into the port-a-potty!

No!

No!

Not the port-a-potty!

I can't!

I'm scared!

I'm scared!

- Did you say "scared"?

- Yeah!

Well, you should be 'Cause you're on Nightmares with Nimbus!

Hello, Stevens Point!

Johnny Nimbus here with Maddie Rooney, the most fearless woman in town!

She just got the pants scared off her live on Channel Four!

Maddie Rooney, you just got nimboozled.

What's going on?

Parker and I have been planning to turn the table of terrors on you seniors for weeks.

And when you humiliated poor Johnny, you created the perfect opportunity for us to spring our trap.

Yep, I faked my death and together we all got sweet, sweet revenge!

And by the way, poor showing on my memorial page, people.

I mean, two condolences and one "He was no Al Roker"?

Come on, people!

Wow.

Well played, little bro.

Middle schoolers win.

Now if you'll excuse us, Reggie and I are taking a victory lap.

After you, Dr.

Parkerstein.

Hey, thank you guys again so much for your help today.

Are you kidding, Liv Rooney?

This was the greatest night of our lives.

The greatest night of her life.

I don't get starstruck.

Is that Austin Moon dressed as bacon?

Austin Moon?

Austin Moon, I am your biggest fan!

It's not really Austin Moon.

I just wanted to see her make a fool out of herself.

No, actually, I think that's really Austin Moon.

Austin Moon?

Hey, tonight was fun hanging out as just friends, you know?

Yeah.

There's really nothing awkward about this at all.

Do you maybe want to not awkwardly share a meal as friends?

Yeah.

Yeah, I'd really like that.

Um, let me just go get Joey.

Totally.

Yeah, take your time.

I'll wait for you.

As long as it takes.

I made that awkward again, didn't I?

Yes.

I'll see you at Stevens Point.

Okay.

Bye.

Give us a good rating on Treat b*at!

Take another fistful of candy!

Give us a good rating on Treat b*at!

Rooney house rules!

- Tell your friends!

- Better yet, tell Treat b*at!

Okay, bye!

You're up to a three candy corn rating.

Happy Holla-ween!

I'm glad I stuck around to see this, but I still don't get what the big deal is with candy.

Hey Evan, have you ever tried a piece of candy?

Never.

I choose willpower and healthy teeth that will last a lifetime.

I hear you, Evan, honey.

But you know what?

Once a year, it is okay to indulge in the sugary joys of Halloween.

Maybe I'll just try one.

Mmm.

Mmm Uh-oh.

Oh?

Honey, are you okay?

I feel funny.

Like I might blast off!

I guess I should call his mother.

Here's Johnny!
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