04x05 - Slumber Party-A-Rooney

[bunniefuu]

(Bell rings)

Falcon, we need your help!

I'm here for ya, Finch.

The cafeteria's serving shawarma and enchiladas.

Which should we choose?

The answer is an enchilada stuffed with shawarma: the shawarm-ilada.

I don't even have to taste that to know that it's amazing.

I never believed Falcon would last this long.

But they eat up every word I say like it's candy.

Is that a "Hey, you're so cool" slow clap or a "Hey, I'm mocking you" slow clap?

A slow clap is always "Hey, I'm mocking you."

But I guess you don't know that because you're soooooo cool.

You got yourself a name, slow clapper?

My name's Skeeter.

I'm the coolest kid at BOOMs.

At least I was, until you took my place while I was away at Space Camp.

(Scoffs)

The coolest kid at BOOMS went to Space Camp?

And I was the coolest kid there, too.

Well, then I guess BOOMS has two cool guys.

You're not as cool as you pretend to be, Joseph Gilligan Rooney.

How did you find out my middle name?!

Not that that is my middle name, 'cause it's not...

unless it is, but I...

I doubt it.

Soon, I'll uncover all your secrets, and I will take you down.

You must have really worked on your slow claps at Space Camp.

(Theme music playing)

♪ Better in stereo ♪

♪ B... B... Better in stereo ♪

- ♪ I'm up with the sunshine ♪

- ♪ Let's go ♪

- ♪ I lace up my high tops ♪

- ♪ Oh no ♪

♪ Slam dunk, ready or not ♪

♪ Yeah, show me what you got ♪

- ♪ I'm under the spotlight ♪

- ♪ Holler ♪

♪ I dare you, come on and follow ♪

♪ You dance to your own b*at ♪

♪ I'll sing the melody ♪

♪ When you say yea-ah-ah ♪

♪ I say no-oh-oh ♪

♪ When you say stop ♪

♪ All I want to do is go go go ♪

♪ You you, the other half of me me ♪

♪ The half I'll never be-e ♪

♪ The half that drives me crazy ♪

♪ You you, the better half of me me ♪

♪ The half I'll always need ♪

♪ But we both know ♪

♪ We're better in stereo ♪

♪ Sometimes in life you've got to... ♪

Ruby, acting: Being the new kid at any school is hard.

The good news about Monahan Academy: we wear uniforms, so at least I blend in.

The bad news?

There's always that one girl who singles you out.

Okay, new girl, now's your chance to prove you're one of us.

(Snaps fingers)

This is a month's worth of toenail clippings.

Gross!

Put them in Stephanie's soup.

Why would I do that?

Two reasons: every new kid punks the dorm big sis.

And the girl who tells you what to do just told you to do it.

So, do I punk Stephanie Einstein, the one person who's been nice to me, or do I tell Priya, head of the Hoover Hall Hooligans, to stick it in her eye?

Gimme the toenails.

Come on, people, it's all about survival.

(Clears throat)

Mmm!

(Crunching)

Mm!

Whoa!

Crunchy croutons today.

Ha ha!

(Crunching)

Wait a second.

These aren't croutons.

I've been... toenailed!

(Laughter)

- Cut!

- (Bell rings)

Yay!

Great scene, Priya, and you, too, Ruby.

Look at you girls go.

A whole new generation of...

♪ Sing It Louder!! ♪

On my old show, Sing It Loud!!, I made such great friendships.

I really hope that Ruby can make some.

Maybe she and Priya will end up being best friends for life.

(Gasps)

Did you just feel that tingle?

I have goose bumps.

So, what are you two gonna do between takes, huh?

You gonna get into some mischief?

You gonna pull some pranks?

You two gonna become best friends?

Actually, I need to learn my lines.

Yep, I don't have time to goof around.

Well, uh...

Okay, wait.

Hold on, hold on.

I mean, there's always time for costars to make lifelong friendships.

I already have a best friend.

It's my pet rat.

Bye.

Bye.

So...

wow.

Priya seems fun, huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Liv, what are you doing?

No, I'm not doing anything.

It's just, now that you're on the show, you're going to be spending so much less time with your old friends, and you're going to be working with Priya.

So, why don't you two, uh, hang out, huh?

Huh?

Huh?

But, I don't really know her.

I mean, not yet.

What do you say that after lunch, you, me, and Priya go to wardrobe and try on every outfit ever?

I hear they have frog costumes.

How fun is that?

We'll see, if I have time after I learn my lines, my dance steps, and do my math homework.

I'm a busy girl, Liv.

Hey, Gemma.

So, um...

Priya and Ruby don't seem to really want to have fun together.

They're taking their jobs like so seriously.

Serious is good.

We're making a TV show.

You know, uh, they flinch when I walk by.

I love them.

It's just, like, on the old show, I put so much pressure on myself and having a BFF there helped me to have fun, and I just so want that for Ruby.

You know.

South Salamanca and I used to drive golf carts around the lot, and we used to dance around and sing in old wigs, and we used to have slumber parties on the set.

You had me until "old wigs." That's disgusting.

Maddie, would you like a fresh-baked muffin?

Um, have you met me?

Yes!

Bam!

Muffin!

Noooo!

That is so gross.

Your Aunt Dena's experimenting in the kitchen again.

And this one is a spelt chia-spinach muffin.

That explains why it is so gross!

Exactly.

I told her that I would try them, but I cannot choke them down.

Dena, oh, ate the whole muffin... delish!

Mom, I can't eat this.

- Then hide it somewhere.

- What?

Another home run, Dena!

Aah!

What?

Where am I supposed to hide this?

Ohh!

Whaa!

No!

Hey...

Maddie.

Parker, are you digging tunnels again?

No.

Bye.

Okay, okay.

Hold it, Shawshank.

You promised that you were gonna stop this!

I did, but then I helped Ruby build a sand castle, and it all came rushing back.

I was born to dig.

Parker, you literally destroyed our home in Wisconsin with your tunnels.

Have you not learned your lesson yet?

Yes.

I made these tunnels safe.

I used titanium beams and Da Vinci arches.

You gotta see her.

She's a beaut.

I mean... there is nothing in this world that could make me want to get in those tunnels right now.

Karen: Maddie, your Aunt Dena made cheese out of seaweed.

Wanna try some?

Get in the hole.

Hey.

Hey.

(Tires screech)

Heyyy!

I am creating a bonding environment for Ruby and Priya.

It may look like I'm driving a golf cart, but really, I'm driving the fun train.

Destination...

Best Friend City.

Chug-a chug-a chug-a chug-a...

Who is ready for fun?!

Punch it, Liv!

Yeaaaah!

So, I may have run the battery down.

Just give me a minute to plug this baby in and in six hours, we will be whooping it up!

That's okay.

I should finish studying my lines for the next scene, anyway.

Yeah, I've got a song to learn.

Oh, wait, okay, hold on.

Guys, guys!

Just...

If you were at home right now, what would you be doing to have fun?

Me and my friends like slumber parties.

I love slumber parties!

Yeah, ya do?

What am I seeing right now?

Did you two just become best friends?

Pretty sure all that happened was we both agreed we liked slumber parties.

Well, I mean, hey, I like slumber parties, too.

Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking right now?

Probably not.

You're kind of a wild card.

Wild is right.

Who wants to have a slumber party here on set tonight?

Are you serious?

No way!

Are we gonna dance?

Are we gonna do each other's hair?

Are we gonna eat waffles?

Somebody tell me what we're gonna do?

Okay, first thing we're gonna do is calm down.

And then get excited 'cause we're having a slumber party on the set!

(Screeching)

Looks like you got yourself a new wallpaper, kid.

Good idea, taking that photo.

Now there's a record of the last day you were cool.

Skeeter, I'm afraid we got off on the wrong foot.

Hello.

I am Falcon, and I come in peace.

I come for w*r.

Tonight I will scour the Internet to find your secrets and tomorrow, the Falcon goes down.

You know, if you take me down, you won't have a nemesis anymore.

Oh, I make enemies quickly.

Falcon, you look concerned.

I've never seen that before.

Is the planet okay?

Finch... you deserve the truth.

You know me as Falcon, but... at my old school, I was... uncool.

How uncool?

Well, I wore kitty cat T-shirts.

That's not so bad.

(Squeaky)

And this is my real voice.

Finch, Falcon's not real.

I'm just Joey Rooney, and soon the entire school will know.

How?

Some kid named Skeeter, he wants to expose me.

Wait, Skeeter's back from Space Camp?

It's cool against cool.

He's gonna go online and dig up my secret uncool past.

Not on my watch, Falcon.

Come here.

Wh-what are you doing?

Erasing your past.

My supercomputer will scan the Internet and delete all things Joey Rooney.

I'll need your middle name.

Oh, um...

It's, uh...

It's...

Gilligan?

Not gonna lie ...that stinks.

So, why are you doing this for me?

When Skeeter was the cool kid, I was nothing.

Under the Falcon regime, I am number two.

And you're my friend.

Oh... thanks, Finch.

Can you say that as Falcon?

(Deep voice)

Thanks, Finch.

Behold.

Parker Tunnels West.

Ohh!

Wow!

That's all you got?

How about, the walls are a nice shade of genius.

The floors are waxed with "how you like me now?"

And the reinforced steel beams are all, "you better ask somebody!"

Yeah, I really hate to admit it, but this does look...

a lot more solid than your old Parker tunnels.

Yep, this time I focused on making them % safe.

Aaaah!

Water!

What do we do?

Oh, that was a surprisingly simple fix.

What... where is this water coming from?

Uh... the... the ocean?

That's a s*ab in the dark.

(Scoffs)

You built tunnels under the ocean?

When I was digging, I thought I heard gophers, but now I'm realizing, that was dolphins.

Parker, you do realize that you could flood Aunt Dena's house!

How are you gonna fix this?

Don't worry, I've got an idea.

I'll be right back.

Don't drown.

Okay, girls, time for the first unofficial, unsanctioned, unapproved sleep-over on the set of...

♪ Sing It Louder!! ♪

♪♪ ♪ We are wound up like a clock ♪

♪ Rollin' like we rock ♪

♪ Comin' out to play ♪

♪ Say hey ♪

♪ Kids just buzzin' like a wire ♪

♪ The roof is gettin' higher ♪

♪ Ain't nothin' in our way ♪

♪ Say hey ♪

♪ When we hear the bass ♪

♪ We'll be losing our minds ♪

♪ Say hey ♪

♪ First note of our song ♪

♪ Is one that goes like ♪

♪ Say hey hey hey ♪

♪ We're gonna make it shake tonight ♪

♪ Just dance your fears away ♪

♪ Say hey hey hey ♪

♪ Who cares if we are wrong or right ♪

♪ We're living for today ♪

♪ Say hey hey hey ♪

♪ While our song is on ♪

♪ Everything's okay ♪

♪ Say hey hey hey ♪

♪ We're gonna make it shake tonight ♪

♪ We're doing it our way ♪

♪ Say hey hey hey ♪♪

(Laughter)

Chug-a chug-a chug-a chug-a...

Errrrrr!

Oh, what's that, Conductor?

Next stop is...

Best Friend Station?

Ahh.

Toot-toot!

Chug-a chug-a chug-a...

Okay, girls...

Wow!

We're just two frogs, all hopped up on dancing and fun!

We are going to catapult that helmet back onto the suit of armor.

Okay, did you two just become best friends?

We're just having fun being dressed like frogs and launching helmets into the air.

Why do you gotta make it weird?

, , ...

both: Ribbit!

(Clang!)

Go, go, go, go, go!

Okay, I'm making some quick-drying Parker Paste.

How's it going over there?

Oh, you know, just holding back

THE ENTIRE PACIFIC OCEAN WITH MY FINGER!

Girl, you have no chill.

It'll plug up that hole in no time.

Uh-oh.

The quick-drying Parker Paste dried a little too quickly.

What should I do?

Ha ha.

Come closer so that I can k*ll you with my free hand.

Relax, we'll figure this out.

(Sighs)

Do you have something to eat, because I am starving!

I could go upstairs and get one of Aunt Dena's gross muffins.

I still have one of those in my pocket.

(Sobbing)

It's like I'm chewing wet cement.

Wait, cement?

Maybe we can plug the hole with it.

(Gasps)

Bleh...

I did not think these muffins could get any grosser Okay.

On the count of , you pull and I'll plug.

- Ready?

- Yeah.

, ...

!

Aaah!

(Gasping)

What?!

That just worked!

The tunnels are safe again!

Or...

Or I'll shut down the tunnels tonight.

I got rid of every trace of Joey Rooney on the Internet.

Thanks, Finch.

If there's anything I can do...

Please record my new outgoing message.

Sure thing.

Hello, you've reached the phone of Finch, Falcon's best friend.

(Chuckles)

Please leave a message after the screech.

(Screeches)

Well, someone thinks he's something, doesn't he?

There's no trace of Joey Gilligan Rooney anywhere.

Well, how unfortunate for you, Scooter.

It's Skeeter, and you know it!

Be gone, enemy of Falcon.

Unless you have any stories of Space Camp you'd like to share.

I will share nothing with you!

Except my wrath!

This is not the end, Falcon.

Not... the... end!

So...

a headless knight, yeah?

...was coming at you, and then, somehow, knocked down a massive stage light...

hmm?

...and then shattered an antique table that the crew of ♪ Sing It Louder!! ♪

Had to fly in from Scotland!

Ahem.

Yes, that is exactly what happened.

Because that is so believable, right?

(Gemma chuckles)

Oh, well, I'm not buying it.

Someone talk.

Hmm...

Okay, I'm really sorry, Gemma.

This whole thing is my fault.

My fault.

I begged Liv to let us have a slumber party on the set.

No, it was my idea to build the catapult.

This is my fault.

But it was my idea to launch the helmet.

Ruby, stop, I don't want you to get in trouble.

I don't want you to get in trouble.

Awwwwww!

You two are taking the blame for each other.

You just became best friends!

Whoa!

I think we did.

Yeah, we did!

Gemma, look how cute!

Awwww!

Best friends.

I don't care.

My table is still broken!

I will forgive this whole thing under one condition.

You name it.

You owe me a slumber party.

Yeah, that's right.

I will see you tomorrow night with sleeping bags in tow.

Oh, uh, fair warning.

I scream in my sleep.

Okay, the tunnels are officially filled in and sealed.

A little piece of me just d*ed, Maddie.

I hope you're happy!

Your tunneling days are over.

So, why don't you give me your headlamp?

Thank you.

And your shovel.

Awesome.

And your backup shovel.

And your emergency shovel.

Amazing!

All right, is that it?

Yes.

Parker?

Fine.

What...?

How...?

You have a problem!

Yeah, I know!

You better ask somebody!