01x21 - Whoomp!

[bunniefuu]

Previously on
The Secret Life of the American Teenager.

???

If I get the job,

the first paycheck I get is
going straight to the attorney.

Gonna take you down to Boykewich's Butchers

and let you get your hands dirty.

And just so you know,
I'm gonna offer a job to Ricky.

It would be good if you
two could work together.

You mugged me, took the money,

and then you hit me in the head with a box.

I don't believe it.

The loan went through. The house e ine.

The only person I should worry
about getting on my side is you.

I want Amy to keep the baby.

Do you really think I
don't care about my baby?

You care enough to take care
of the baby before he's born,

but not enough to take
care of him after that?

How much you going to pay me?

Let's go grab dinner and talk.

Here's what the church can offer.

A job in the daycare center.

You could teach little kids music
they'd pay you for that.

And we can babysit for you.

Adrian volunteered to throw
the baby shower at her house.

Right. I know that you want to keep it.

I think that you could do it,
but it's not gonna be easy.

I know that I can be a good mom

because I' the best mom
in the whole world.

- Hello?
- Hi, Adrian. It's Grace.

Why didn't you call me???

- Are you expecting a call?
- No.

Your brother still hasn't called you?

- No.
- Oh.

- He'll call.
- Yeah, I know, he will.

He'll call.

I don't need your pity.

I'm not pitying you.

???need any help with the shower.

No.

When is that?

Adrian, it's tomorrow.

Ugh. Yeah, okay. I'll--
I'll get some chips and dip.

I got a present already.

Chips and dip?
What about petit fours?

Individual quichAB? Punch?

As in "I'll punch you if
you make another suggestion"?

We don't need all that stuff.

Okay, well, what games do you have plan?

Games?

Have you ever been to a baby shower?

I'm in the 10th grade.

Pardon me if I'm new at this.

Do you want a quincea?era? I can help.

Is that spicy?

???

Grace, it's just a bunch of girls coming over.

Okay, I'll bring the refreshments.

Fine. Who's coming?

You didn't send out the invitations?

Uh, you gave me invitations.

You didn't tell me who to send them to.

Ay dios mio, girl.
I'm coming over there.

Yeah, whatever.

You can come over here to yell at me,

but you can't come over here to visit?

I told my mother that maybe
I didn't get invited the shower

because I hadn't been a good
friend to you all this time.

- So now can I come?
- Of course.

- Me?
- If you want. I guess.

You guess?

I'll call Adrian.
I'm sure it was an oversight.

Really?

Didn't have anything to do
with what we said about Ben?

Madison.

We don't think he's pretentious.

We don't care if he has a driver.

Right. He-- He's a great guy.

Yeah, and we don't care
that he's taken you away from us,

or that you love him more than you do us.

We don't feel like you've
tossed us away at all.

Madison, I didn't know you
felt that way about Ben.

Until now.

My point is that we don't.

I'm not the one who called her a harlot. Twice.

That was Henry,
and I think he just said that

because he's sexually
frustrated and irritable.

All I ever said was
that she bamboozled you

and she doesn't even know I said that.

Unless you told her.

I didn't tell her anything.

I don't know why you didn't get an invite.

Maybe you should call Adrian.

Why? Adrian doesn't decide who
gets invited and who doesn't.

Amy decides who gets invited,

and clearly she decided not to invite me.

You want me to call Amy
and get you an invitation?

No, they probably just forgot to call me.

I'll go anyway.

Oh.

Hey, by the way, are any mothers
invited to the shower tomorrow?

Yeah. Amy.

No, I mean, any grandmothers? Aunts?

I hope not.

I can't believe they didn't invite me.

It's probably because of your
father and Adrian's mother.

What about Grace's mom?

Look, I don't know what you're thinking,

but I think it's just
for Amy and her friends.

- Okay.
- Okay?

Okay.

Hi, can I have the number
for Dr. and Mrs. Bowman?

George?

No. Anne.

Oh. Hi, Anne.

What a nice surprise.

And it wouldn't be a surprise
if George were calling?

You're a nice surprise.
He would be a bad surprise.

I'm just gonna come right
out and ask you this--

He only came here once,

and it was to try to get Marshall and
me to help him get rid of Ricky's father.

That's not what I was gonna ask,
but that's interesting.

Are there any mothers invited
to Amy's shower tomorrow?

Let me ask Grace.

Grace, it's-- It's Anne, Amy's mom.

Is she invited to the baby shower?

- Mm-hm.
- Oh. Am I invited?

Is Adrian's mom coming?

Oh, yeah, is she?

She's working, but you're invited.

Everyone's invited. Adrian
didn't get invites out in time.

Oh. We're invited.

Great.

- So I'll see you tomorrow.
- Okay.

Thirsty?

Good morning.

Good morning.

For you and for me.

- Oh, George, don't tell me...
- It's true, Anne.

- You're moving?
- I am.

Oh, George, thank you,
thank you, thank you.

So you're going to miss me, huh?

Oh, I will, I promise.

Do you have any other boxes?
Want me to help you?

I have plenty of boxes

and I have a truck coming later.

Today? You're moving out today?

I am.

- Do the girls know?
- Yep.

Oh, so once again...

You're last to know.

Well, I don't care.

The good news makes up for the timing.

- I'll be around.
- Call first.

You too.

Why didn't you tell me?

I didn't know I was gonna
get the keys until yesterday.

Oh, where are you going?

I'll let you know.

I don't care. The point is you're going.

Yes!

Oh. He told you.

He did.

Good. So now you know.

- So where's he moving?
- That I don't know.

I bet it's that house that's
next to Taco Taco Taco.

I just noticed that it
went from sale to lease.

He loves that house.

He loves the idea of being able
to walk across the driveway

to go get a burrito any time, day or night.

If that house had been for
sale when we bought this,

we'd be living there now.

- Uh-huh.
- So anyway,

need a drive to get Amy a
present or did you get one?

Wait, what are we talking about?

The baby shower?

Oh. That. Yeah, I wasn't invited.

Oh, you're going.

- Why?
- Why?

Because you're Amy's sister.

You're gonna be Aunt Ashley,
and don't forget,

you were the one who
begged her to keep the baby.

So now you get over there and
support her decision to keep the baby,

and you do that by writing
down every gift she gets,

writing down who gave it to her,

and their address so she
can send a thank-you note.

And please pretend to like everyone there.

Okay, and that will fulfill my obligation
as aunt for the child's lifetime?

That's just the beginning.

Hey.

You gonna be okay with him moving?

I know you're gonna miss him.

Maybe.

You know, before he goes,

you might want to ask him for
some money for Amy's present.

Dad, I'm eight-and-a-half months pregnant.

I'm a little irritable.
Tell me what you're saying.

All right, all right. I just
don't want your mother to overhear.

I was saying, if you want,
you can come and live with me.

You and the baby. I mean,
there's plenty of room.

I'm gonna build a nursery either way.

I think we'll be fine here.

And I think I'm gonna need help from Mom.

All right.

You need comic relief,
you know where to find me.

Yeah, and Mom should
know where to find you too.

I'll tell her when I want to tell her,

when she needs to know.

Why do we keep hiding things from Mom?

It's fun and she reacts badly to everything,

and it's practice for the other things I
gotta keep from her when I move out of here.

Hey.

Uh, what do you want for your shower gift?

That should be pretty easy, Ashley.

I don't have anything for the baby.

I have one pair of overalls.

Okay. So no overalls, then.

What about a pony? You want a pony?

- I got a big yard.
- I want a pony.

I wanted to get you a pony,
but your mother hates ponies.

???
motorcycles, cigars, hot tubs.

All the stuff that's
gonna be at the new house.

Maybe we are invited.

Maybe Adrian just forgot to call us too.

She forgot to call Alice. Alice is going.

Maybe we're gonna get the call.

I don't think we're getting the call.

I don't think guys are
invited to these things.

That's old school, man.
Guys-- Guys go to baby showers.

Oh. Wait.

Maybe Ricky's invited,

and it would be awkward
if you're invited too.

But awkward or not,

if Ricky's gonna be there,
you have to be there.

I don't think Ricky's invited either,

but even if he is, well, it's not my baby.

It's your Amy.

What are we gonna do? Nothing?

Hey, it's me.

I can be there in a half an hour.

Oh, can you?

I'm not looking for that.

I'm looking for that.

I'm calling to see if you have anyone
who should be invited to Amy's shower.

Your mom, aunt, stepsister, foster sisters.

Anyone you know who would come?

When is it?

This afternoon.

Yeah, well, thanks for
letting my family know.

I didn't let anyone's family know.

- Do you know anyone or not?
- Not.

Oh, come on, we're trying
to get swag for your son.

I'm working, I'll buy him what he needs.

Babies need a lot of stuff. A lot.

Yeah, yeah, I know. Thanks for calling.

Ricky.

You left your clothes in the dryer. Again.

I took them out so the rest
of us can do our laundry done.

Sorry. Thanks.

I was vacuuming,
I didn't hear the buzzer.

You know what I heard at work yesterday?

Uh, that Amy's keeping the baby.

Yeah.

I heard that at work instead of from you.

That's why I'm working.

She's keeping the baby
and I'm gonna help out.

Well, I guess you better start
baby-proofing this room down here.

You know, it's the only area in the
whole house that's not baby-proofed.

The baby's not gonna be here.
The baby's gonna be with Amy.

Oh, really. Every day for
the rest of his life?

He's never gonna be here?

I don't think so. No.

I don't think anyone's gonna be
comfortable with me babysitting.

Are you comfortable babysitting?

Are you going to be
comfortable being with your son?

What? I'm gonna touch my own kid?

Just because I was abused,

doesn't mean I would ever,
ever do anything to my son.

I know that.

I just wanna make sure that you know that.

I know it, but it doesn't matter.

I think Ben's gonna be
more like the father.

Think again.

I doubt Ben knows how to do laundry.

I doubt Ben knows

how to make a meal out of whatever
is left in the refrigerator.

I doubt if Ben knows to check
that the doors are locked

before everybody goes to bed at night.

I doubt if Ben can even drive,

or find an all-night pharmacy
when someone is sick.

I doubt if Ben can even take
care of anyone, even himself.

But you have been taking care
of yourself for a long time.

I mean, you even help me with
all these kids in and out of here.

I wish that you didn't have
to take care of your son

and be in high school at the same time,

???

you are.

The girls are having a
baby shower for Amy today.

Oh, and I wasn't invited, of course.

Well, do you wanna go?

Nah, I don't think so.

But you know what?

I'm gonna buy you something.

You're the father.

You're gonna be needing things too.

Is it over yet?

You just gotta get into it.

Yeah, Adrian, it's gonna be a great party.

Hey, I hope you don't mind,
I invited Shawna.

What'd she say? She say yes?

I had to talk her into it.

And how'd you do that, Jack?

How'd you talk her into it?

It doesn't matter.
We're happy to have her.

How'd you make out with the phone list?

I haven't called anyone except for Ricky.

You didn't call anyone
after I left last night?

I'll call them. Jeez.

I'm excited to meet Shawna.

What time you dropping her off?

Dropping her off?

No guys are coming. It's a baby shower.

- So?
- So it's for girls. Only.

I wish I would have know that
before I rented a helium t*nk

and blew up these balloons for you.

Oh, come on, we're friends.

You don't mind blowing up
a few balloons for me, do you?

You're not flirting with me, are you?

Do you want me to be flirting with you?

Depends on whether or not
you're still in love with Ricky.

Ricky is about to become a father.

I think we have to settle for just being friends.

Sometimes when you're friends with the person

it lasts longer than when you're
in a relationship with them.

I don't now, or never wanted
to be just friends with you.

So how serious are you about Shawna?

I'm serious about her. Yeah.

Grace, Shawna and I--

None of my business.

If it's just a girls' party,

I don't think I'll come
with Shawna after all.

Okay.

Well, uh, if you don't need anything else...

No. I think we've got
everything we need.

All right, look.

I know I shouldn't ask,
but I'm gonna anyway:

Did you really need balloons
or did you just want to see me?

No, we-- We really needed balloons.

Balloons are fun.

And I-- I wanted to see you.

Hi, this is Adrian from school.

The majorette?

Yeah, that one.

I'm giving Amy a baby shower today,
do you want to come?

She's the pregnant girl in the band.

Yeah, all right, whatever.

Hey, this is Adrian.

I need you to do me a favor.

I need you to come to
Amy's baby shower today.

So? I've slept with other
girls' boyfriends, so what?

Hi, it's Adrian.

Look, I'm having a party this
afternoon, you want to come?

No, it's not that kind of party.

I need some help with the phone calls.

Hey-- Did you say something?

Yeah, I said--

Why do you look like that?

Like what?

I know that look.

What look?

The flushed-in-the-face,
messed-up hair look.

Oh, no, that's, um--

That's just because we
were blowing up balloons.

Where are the balloons?

I thought we tied them--

We meant-- We meant to tie them.

Well, you must have had your
hands full with something else.

Yeah, they must have blown away.

- I can't believe it.
- What a shame.

After Jack came over
to help us and everything,

He worked so hard on that.

Yeah.

Okay, you're gonna have to call some people.

People don't like me. No one's coming.

Okay. Give me the phone list.

Hey, Marilyn?

Hey, it's Grace Bowman. How are you?

How's the new puppy?

Oh, I can't wait to see him.
I bet he's so cute.

You have to bring him over.

You know, my brother loves dogs,

and we were thinking a sasquatch
is the perfect breed for him.

Hey, listen, I know this
is totally last-minute,

and it's kind of a spontaneous event,

but Adrian and I are throwing
a baby shower for Amy--

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Aw, okay. Thank you.

And I can't wait to see the puppy. Bye.

She has an orthodontist appointment.

But I am sure there are plenty of girls

who don't have orthodontist
appointments who would love to come.

So I'll make the calls,
I'll get girls over here.

It's gonna be a beautiful afternoon.

He'll call.

Your brother?

He'll call.

I don't care about him.

It was a stupid idea to go out
with him in the first place,

and I hate all that romance stuff.

I mean, the flowers and the
teddy bears and everything?

It was all jusCFe.

He's cheating.

Jack doesn't want me to
go to the baby shower.

He's totally cheating on me.

Let's not mix business with pleasure.

He's not cheating on me,

I don't want to know about cheating on you.

Yes, you do.

I'm your sister.

And you don't like guys who cheat on me.

Aw, Shawna. They always
end up cheating on you.

That's just guys. Guys cheat.

And what do we do???

No. Nope. You're not going there again.

I am going to kick that 16-year-old Romeo
to the curb and run over him.

You have no proof.

I know when a guy's cheating on me.

Just like you know when
a guy's in love with you?

Yes, I'm free tonight.
You wanna go out?

- I need your help.
- Anytime.

I need guests for Amy's shower.

It's today at 3 at Adrian's. Girls only.

I'm on it.

Hi, we haven't been formally introduced yet.

I'm Joe Hampton

and I can tell you anything you
want to know about anyone here

at Grant High School in
exchange for a very small favor.

I can't tell her. You tell
her. She can tell me no.

No, she can't, Ash.

And she's gonna get upset,

and then she's gonna be fine with it,

just like she was when I toldr I want
She told you she wanted a divorce.

????

You didn't tell her you wanted one.

Yeah, that was the story
when I was in the garage.

Now that we're moving,
I asked for the divorce.

The man has to take the blame.

- Because?
- Because that's what a man does.

He accepts that everything
is his fault. I accept that.

But it's not your fault.

What about Adrian's mom?

CF, yeah.
So it is your fault.

That's what I'm saying.

I love you, Ash,
and we're all gonna be fine.

Everything's gonna be fine.

Just tell her.

Early. I hate early.

I couldn't call you.
Ruben talked to my dad.

They took my cell phone.

He knows you've called a hundred times,

??Td he said if I didn't break this off,

he and my dad would send me
to m*llitary school this summer.

He really, really doesn't want me to see you.

So you're here because...?

Obviously, I don't want to
go to m*llitary school,

I'd have to cut my hair,

but...

I miss you.

I like what you've done with the place.

I'm giving Amy a baby shower.

The pregnant girl.

Yeah, I know. Your boyfriend's one-night stand.

He's not my boyfriend.

Should I open that?

I don't know.

The timing doesn't seem right.
I think I'll just--

We only have a half-hour.

- I'll come back.
- No, no.

This'll be fun.

I don't know, Adrian.

I'd like to have more than a half an hour.

I mean, after all, this is your first time.

Didn't you reclaim your virginity?

Oh, no. I never really made that commitment.

We can wait till later.

You risked m*llitary school to come over here.

I am not gonna let you go off to
w*r without something to remember me by.

Hey, Jack, come on in.

Hey, bro. What up, dog?

You don't have to do that, man.

In fact, don't do that.

Question:

You're not cheating on my sister, are you?

What? No, why would you
think I'm cheating on Shawna?

No, I wa???
No. Shawna's thinking that.

Why?

That girl has a nose for cheating.

She got it through experience.

She could start her own business:
Cheaters, Incorporated.

She's a cheat savant.

All right, well, I'm not cheating on her.

I'm a liar savant.

And you, my mentor and friend,

are lying.

I am not.

And where's Shawna? We need to talk.

She's on her way to the
baby shower to meet the slut.

Which one?

The one that you've been with.

She went to the shower alone?
Why would she do that?

She doesn't know anybody.

Weren't you listening?

Said she's going to meet the slut.

She doesn't need you for that.

I't cheating, and she's not going there to,

you know, cause a scene
or something, is she?

No, Shawna's got class.

The scene is gonna be when she finds you.

This-- This isn't one
of your pranks, is it?

Uh-uh.

Now, tell me the truth,

are you cheating on my sister?

No.

You thinking about cheating on my sister?

I'm sorry you guys can't go to the shower.

Yeah, me too.

If you see Ashley, tell her I said hello.

I think I'll be seeing Ashley.

But she's been seeing someone, you know.

Still.

I could love that girl.

But don't tell her that,

just-- Just tell her I said hello.

I'll tell her.

I love you.

Oh, so we'll, uh, drop you off

and then we'll pick you up
after the shower's over.

And, uh, then I have a little gift for you.

No, Ben.

Ben, you are a gift.

I can't believe how you've stayed
with me through this whole thing.

You're so sweet.

Uh, we'd better get going, Amy.

Amy? Ben?

Benjamin!

Did you hear something?

- No.
- What's with you two?

I'm sorry, Mr. Boykewich.

I'm just so happy today.

Yeah, me too.

Uh, I'm gonna go to the restroom downstairs.

Oh. He's kicking.

A lot.

How much longer?

- Three weeks.
- Can't wait.

I can.

Bye.

You know, sexual activity can induce labor.

So be careful. That's all I'm saying.

She's got three weeks.

That counts as sexual activity?

Henry, you have a father, right?

Discuss that stuff with him.

Oh, I don't think he knows
anything about this stuff.

What, you think a stork dropped you off?

I got the ice!

Your manager let me use
the machine by the pool.

He's so nice.

And so are your neighbors,
the Ortiz family.

Mrs. Ortiz said she's gonna drop by

and bring a little something,
some homemade salsa.

She makes her own salsa
and she makes her own chips.

I had to invite her.

- You have to hide.
- Where?

there. Just stay there, and
lock the door when I get out.

I'll be right there, Grace!

- Oh.
- Yeah.

Oh.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- Are you...?
- Max.

You must be Grace.

I am so happy you finally called her.

Yeah, I am too.

Or you were about to be.

Did I just hear someone at the door?

Do you want me to get it?

Yeah, if you don't mind.

I think maybe I should get dressed.

Well, it was so nice to finally meet you.

He is cute.

No, no, no, no, no. Don't leave.

This shower will be over in a half-hour.

I have to or Ruben's gonna get suspicious.

Said I was going to the car wash.

No, please, don't leave.

Are you the slut that
had oral sex with Jack

and broke him up with his girlfriend?

Oh, no, no. No, no, no.

Um, this is the slut's condo,
but I'just answering the door.

But she's not really a slut.

She just has that reputation.

Adrian's really such a nice girl.

You're gonna love her.

Adrian, Shawna's here.
Jack's new girlfriend.

Oh, excuse me one second.

So you must be the girlfriend.

- The ex-girlfriend.
- Yeah.

Hi, Alice! Come on in.

Meet Shawna, Jack's new girlfriend.

Another one? Is everyone
here one of Jack's girlfriends?

Hi. Alice.

Hi, Alice. Shawna.

I don't think Jack's ever mentioned you.

He's never mentioned you either.

But Jack, like me, uses
discretion in his relationships.

We don't broadcast our
every move over the Internet.

You don't have to.

I know when a man is cheating on me,

and I know who he's cheating with.

And it's not you.

Would either of you two like some quiche?

Quiche? There's quiche?

Yeah, hi, come on in.

If we had gotten our invitation in advance,

we would have volunteered
to make full-size quiches.

??The little ones are finger food.

Uh, you two already know Alice.
But this is Shawna, Jack's girlfriend.

Come in, come in, sit down,
make yourselves at home.

- I'll take that for you.
- Oh, thank you.

Adrian!

Hi. I'm Grace Bowman.

Oh, the Christian girl.

Hi.

Where's Adrian? I wanna meet Adrian.

And Amy. And Ben. And Ricky.
Are the guys coming?

No, it's just us girls.

Oh.

I'm sorry, and you are?

Oh, yeah, right. I forgot.

I'm Marc's wife, Virginia.

Marc's wife?

- Marc Molina.
- Mr. Molina's wife?

Yeah.

What do you have to eat?

Oh, come in, sit down.

- I'll get you a little bit of everything.
- Okay.

I didn't know Mr. Molina was expecting.

???

????

That's my mother.

She had a little accident in the parking lot.

Thank heavens she dropped me off in front.

And you shouldn't know
that Mr. Molina's expecting,

because counselors should not discuss
personal business with students.

And students shouldn't invite
counselors' wives to baby showers.

Oh, that was probably Adrian.

No, someone named Joe.

Oh. Joe.

Well, I'm so happy you came. Come in.

I want to hit that lady.

It's okay, Tammy. It was
upsetting, but it's just a car.

Thankfully, no one got hurt.

I can't believe she did that.

You know, maybe Adrian knows who it is.

We should get her license number.

No, I think we better leave well enough alone.

She looked nuts.
I don't like to criticize,

but something was wrong with that woman.

I don't want her to know who I am.

- Are you okay?
- No.

I told her I didn't want
to come to this shower.

Yeah. Me neither.

I have a really bad feeling about this.

What up, G?

Please.

Didn't I tell you I'm
not a drop-in kind of guy?

I don't know what type of meeting this is,

but I'm gonna go wait in the truck.

What are you talking about?

Goodbye.

What's in the pillowcase?

Nothing.

Come on. What's in there?

What do you want?

- I wanna know what's in there.
- I don't.

It's none of your business.
It's my house. It's my room.

- It's my pillowcase.
- Goodbye.

Hey, if you tell anyone...

- I won't. I--
- I will.

I'm practicing diapering.
I've done it before,

but it's been a while
since there was a baby here.

I've never done it.
Let me try it. Here.

You open the gift. Duncan, you time me.

Okay.

Am I in a basement with
two guys playing with dolls?

Get this over there. Ah!

sh**t.

Hello, little mama.
Is the party for you?

Yeah, I'm Amy. You have to help me.

I think the baby is coming.

Can you get my mom, please?

Hurry.

Hola, Mrs. Ortiz.

Everyone, this is Mrs. Ortiz.

Is there a Mrs. Amy's mother?

That's me.

Everything's fine. You come with me.

I have a surprise.

Everyone, the surprise is
homemade chips and salsa.

Doesn't that sound like fun?

Adrian!

Amy, are you okay?

I think this is it, Mom.

I'm having the baby.

Oh, I don't know, Amy.
You still got a few weeks left.

And there's a lot of false
labor pains towards the end.

Well, false or not, now
we have an excuse to leave.

Mom, are you gonna take me to the hospital?

Ashley, call your father.
Have him meet us there.

Come on. Come on.

- Did you tell her?
- I didn't get a chance.

I think Amy's in labor.

Just meet us at the hospital.

Are you sure? I'm
paying these guys by the hour.

- Dad.
- No kidding?

You're on the way to the hospital?

Yeah.

????

Okay, I'm gonna go in the next room,

and I'm gonna turn the music on,

and then you'll dance your way in,

and I'll tell them that you're
the stripper for the party.

Okay, one, I don't think they
have strippers at baby showers,

and two, I'm not that good of a dancer,

and three, I want your friends to like me.

Walk around with your shirt
off and they'll like you.

Adrian!

What is going on?

I was having a baby shower for Amy, but--

Where is everyone?

Well, I hope it was worth it.

I hope one afternoon was
worth eight weeks of boot camp,

getting up at 4 a.m.,

running till you vomit,
and shaving your head.

It was.

I think I'm in love,
to tell you the truth.

- In love?
- Yeah, Adrian.

I'm falling in love with you.

And I want him to know that.

Really?

I'm not comfortable with him knowing that.

Why do you keep complicating my life?

I don't know. I don't mean to.

Yeah, you do. I think you do.

I don't hear you saying
you're falling in love with him.

Did you ever think I was
looking after your best interest

when I discouraged you from
going out with Adrian?

What do you mean by that?

It means you've got
a lot of growing up to do.

You're not ready to fall in love.

You don't really know what love is.

Could that be because my daddy
wasn't around when I was growing up?

Or could that be because you
don't know what love really is?

Tell him, or better yet, tell your wife.

He's been seeing my mom.

All those out-of-town seminars,

those are a lie.

You can thank me later for
getting you out of boot camp.

You know, they take girls too.

I really didn't wanna know.

And did you wanna tell me
you love me too, before I go?

I didn't think so.

You know, I think if I had
tried a couple more times,

I could've b*at him.

I don't-- I don't get the time-trial aspect.

I don't know why you have to
hurry up and put the diaper on.

I think the thing is cleanliness,

comfort and safety.

I mean, not that I wanna be
talking about this kind of stuff

while I'm eating or before I'm 30.

So you think I'm cheating on you?

Yeah.

With Grace.

We kissed. That's it.

You see, I went over there to
help out with the baby shower.

She wanted me to bring over one of
those helium tanks to blow up balloons.

I didn't see any balloons.

We were outside and we
weren't paying attention.

They kind of floated away.

But there were balloons.
I'm not lying about that.

What are you lying about?

Nothing, really.

I like you and I like being with you.

I just-- I don't really get the feeling
you wanna be with me for a lifetime.

I thought I did.

- And then?
- I met your friends.

What's wrong with my friends?

They're all...

teenagers, and I'm not a teenager,

and you should be able to be a teenager,

and I don't wanna take that from you,

and I don't wanna be a teenager again myself.

- Really?
- Really.

I like being 20 and I'm about to be 21.

And if there's five years
difference between us,

I could actually get arrested
for sleeping with you.

Yeah, but I wanted to sleep with you, so...

You said "wanted." Past tense.

Did I?

You did.

This where you tell me we can be friends?

Because I don't get that.

Okay.

Then I will just be Duncan's sister,

and you can still be Duncan's mentor.

Please. Because he really likes you.

And so do I.

I really like you too, Shawna.

So I guess I'll, uh...

I'll see you around?

- Okay.
- All right.

All right, I'll see you next Monday?

- Okay.
- All right.

Oh, my big sister's growing up.

Seriously, you did a great job.

It's hard to be a hostess
at someone else's house.

It wasn't too bad, was it?

No.

I can always say the first
time I threw a baby shower,

the baby came the same day.

Exactly.

- How did it go?
- It was nice.

Tammy called me and she said it was terrible.

Oh, it was a lovely shower.

And Tom, guess what?

Amy's on her way to the
hospital to have the baby.

Ouch.

I mean, oh, the miracle of life.

Hey, Mom, um,

there's something I wanted to tell you.

You sound serious.

I hope this isn't about
those birth control pills.

Oh, I hope they get a room ready soon.

It's okay.

Why don't you and Ashley go take a walk?

Oh, I don't-- I don't know, Mom.

I think I'd rather wait for the
pain medication and then take a walk.

Well, Amy, after you take the pain medication,

you won't be able to walk.

Oh. Yeah. I forgot.

Good thing we scheduled that marathon
birthing seminar for next weekend.

Good plan.

Ashley, can you...?

Thanks.

Are you okay?

No.

What if that big baby can't get
through that little girl of ours?

She'll be okay.

The doctor said she'll be okay.

How does the doctor know she'll be okay?

Because she's a doctor.

I can't believe that Amy's having a baby.

I still don't want to believe it.

Yeah, me neither. But it's true.

What are you and Ashley not telling me?

Some other time. This isn't the right time.

I wanna know.

You'll just get upset.

My 15-year-old daughter is having a baby,

and I'm not that upset.

I think I'm doing okay, don't you?

Yeah, you are doing okay.

You're a strong woman, Anne.

A lot stronger than I ever realized.

Thank you.

Ashley's moving in with me.

Are you scared?

Yeah.

But I can't wait.

I can't wait to see him.

Yeah, me too.

You're gonna help me with him,
aren't you, Ashley?

Of course I am.

You're not just moving in with Dad

so I can have your room for a nursery?

You're gonna use my room as a nursery?

I'm kidding.

Lot of changes this year.

Yeah.

Ashley, ??nt you to be in the
room with me when he comes.

Um, Amy,

there are things you can't really un-see.

You're kidding again, right?

Right.

I don't mind staying with you

as long as I don't have to see anything.

I feel the same way.

Hi, Amy.

We were waiting for you.

Thank you.

You can't be in the room.

I will be wherever you want me to be.

Did you call Ricky?

No, uh, someone will probably call him.

Adrian's probably already called him. Or Grace.

Shouldn't you call him?

Let's try to do the right thing,

you and me, for the baby.

Hi, Ricky. It's me, Amy.

I just wanted to tell you
that I'm at the hospital.

I didn't know if someone had called you.

No. Why are you at the hospital?
Is everything okay?

Everything's fine.

The baby's coming.

- Oh, my God. Now?
- Yeah.

I thought maybe you'd wanna be here.

You did?

I mean, I didn't know if you
wanted me to be there or not.

We never really talked about it.

Well, I think you should be here.

He's your son.