02x01 - The Big One

[bunniefuu]

You don't think I could ever forget the night
we spent together at band camp, do you?

This is kind of my first date.

Yeah, it's kind of my first date, too.

That idiot's falling in love.

I'm pregnant.

Amy, you can't be pregnant.

Maybe we should think about adoption.

Oh, no. Mimsy, thank you for letting me stay with you.

My mom's here. She doesn't know you're not living here.

Adoption is not an option.

My parents gave me birth control pills.

Your parents let you go on the pill?

I'm going to get a job, and when I get a job,

I'm going to proceed with the divorce,

and you are going to be moving.

I don't believe it! The loan went
through! The house is mine!

How much are you thinking about paying me?

Let's go grab dinner and talk.

Here's what the church can offer you.

A job in the daycare center.

You could teach the little kids music,
and they'd pay you for that.

And we can all babysit for you.

You're moving?
I am.

Oh, George, thank you!

I think this is it, Mom.

I'm having the baby.

I think Amy's in labor. Just
meet us at the hospital.

What are you and Ashley not telling me?

Ashley's moving in with me.
The baby's coming.

I think you should be here. He's your son.

I know you better than anyone,
and if you ever need me, call me.

I'm thinking about getting back together with Jack.

I still think you could do better.

You don't get lonely?
I get lonely.

Are you Betty?
Yeah, I'm Betty.

How can making out be so good and sex so bad?

I'm not ready to have sex.
Not till you graduate from med school.

I don't know if I can wait that long.

Howdy, neighbor! Bought the house next door.

You left your wife?
And the boys.

You and my mom... you're not...
No. Not right now, anyway.

Why don't you name him?
John.

I like "John."

I'm tired.

Okay, Amy. Why don't you go back to bed?

I adore you.

And I'm not just saying that because
you slept with me on our first date.

Hi, John. Daddy's here.

I love you.

So, looks like you've got everything under control.

So, do you want to come say good-bye to Mimsy?

We're just hanging out with her and her friend.

Do I want to go over there?

Do you think she could come over here with her friend?

Kind of a mess over here.
Yeah. I know that.

You want to help me out?

Amy, if I help you out, you'll never
learn to do this on your own.

Then I'll just be a teenage mother enabler.

Bye.

Oh, and I think Mom adds milk
to the soup, not water.

Thanks. A lot.

All right.

I am just going to...

lay you down right here,

and then I'm going to finish making the soup,

and then give you a bath, and then
read you chapter 27 in World History...

"The Decline of the Roman Empire."

There you are.
Here I am.

You're late. And I've been
busy doing all this stuff.

And I cooked dinner... soup.

Soup and?

Just soup.
Well, I can go pick something up.

Why? Why would you go pick something up?

Because you, as a new mother, should
be eating more than soup for dinner.

I had a turkey wrap this afternoon after school.

Well, I didn't. I've just had an apple.

That's all I've had since lunch.
Good.

Meaning?
Nothing. Just good.

Look Amy, if you have something to say, why don't you just say it?

I read in this article that when women reach your age,

their metabolism starts slowing down.

Not that yours has slowed down or anything...

Uh-huh.
But it could at any time, so

I thought we'd just have soup.

In case my metabolism comes
to a dead halt tonight?

Mom!
Amy.

What's in the briefcase?
What?

What's in the briefcase?
What's in that brown paper bag?

Who wants to know?
I want to know.

That's not...
What?

Nothing.
What's wrong with you?

Mom, you're gaining weight.

You're tired all the time.
Your hands and feet are swollen.

You're not...
I don't know.

That's why I have an early
pregnancy test in my briefcase.

Early pregnancy test?
Well, they don't make late pregnancy tests.

I knew it. How could you
be pregnant at your age?

I don't know.
Mom!

Well, I would rather be pregnant
than be fat and eat soup every night.

Well?
Well, I'm not fat.

Whose is it?
That's the first thing you're going to say to me...

"Whose is it?"
I don't know what to say.

And I want to know whose it is.

Amy, I think I'm going to tell
the father before I tell you.

Oh. Thanks. I thought we were close.

I thought we weren't keeping
secrets from each other anymore.

Mother and daughter bonding.
Two mothers bonding.

Is it Dad's, or is it David's?
Amy.

Come on.

You told Ben before you told me.

In fact, you told everyone before you told me.

Fine. Who's going to tell Mimsy?

Who's going to tell your mother?

She could come back over here any minute.
Yeah. I doubt it.

She loves spending time with your father.

Besides, I'm going to tell Mimsy
when I'm ready to tell Mimsy.

See? Now you know where I was coming from.

Don't you like my new house?

Oh, I do.

The only thing that's missing is Anne. Poor Anne.

Well, she's either pregnant, or she's fat.

She was never this fat when she was pregnant.

She's 57 years old. She can't be pregnant.

Anne? She's not even 40.

You don't believe that, do you?

I did.
No.

I remember when I had her.
It was right after World w*r II.

Fred and I were in such high spirits.

The whole world was.

Well, except for maybe Germany.
And I remember I said to Fred,

"Let's usher in the new year with a bang."

And we did.

What year was that?
1951.

That's a few years after World w*r II.

Yeah. You bet.

I remember it was much more fun trying to
have a child than actually having a child.

Oh, that Anne.

Oh, she was so difficult.

Well, you know that.
I sure do, Mimsy.

That's why you've always been my favorite.

Oh, not that it wasn't nice being
over there with the three of them.

It was really nice. But it's much nicer being over here.

What makes you think she's pregnant and not just fat?

She's... stacked.

She's always been stacked. Yeah, she takes after me.

but Except that I'm thinner, of course.

But, you know, I don't like the way... it's not nice.

It's just not nice the way she
lets everything hang out that way.

And Amy... you really should speak to her.

You really should speak to both of them.

They're sending out the wrong message.
You know, they both could get pregnant again.

I think I might mind my own beeswax with that one.

That's more your area.
Okay.

We'd better be getting home, Mims.

Oh, yes, indeed.

I don't want to be late getting in bed.

You do mean that you don't
want to be late getting home, right?

What's your problem?

I'm having some fun. I'm allowed to have some fun.

Good night. Nice meeting you.

Good night.

Good night, all.

Okay, what's going on?

I mean, that guy's just the driver, isn't he?

I don't know.

But I think you might've just lost your inheritance.

You hungry?
Depends. Where do you want to eat tonight?

Depends. What time you got
to be up for school tomorrow?

Well, if I go, I guess the same time
that I've been getting up for eight years.

Got it.

I don't know. I want him to be happy.

And I don't mind if my dad dates.

It's just that she's nothing like my mother.

Would you want her to be?
I like her.

I like her, but I just don't
see her has stepmother material.

You're too old to have a stepmother.
She's not going to be your stepmother.

She's going to be your father's new wife.

I think you're both a little ahead of the game here.

They've just been going out for a few weeks.

Still, he's never dated before.

And if he has, he's never introduced me
to anyone before, so this could be serious.

I know it's serious.
I like her.

I'm not saying I don't like her. She just...

She makes me uncomfortable, for some reason.

Maybe it's her breasts. They're huge.

Doesn't make me uncomfortable.

So you said. But why do you like her?
Just 'cause she has huge breasts?

No.
Then what do you like about her?

I like her brain, too.
Right.

A woman can't be smart and have big breasts?

Of course she can. But I don't think
this woman is particularly smart,

and I don't think you like her for her brain, Henry.

Have it your way. I still like her.

What do you like about me, Henry?

Well, not your breasts.

I had to do it.
That wasn't funny.

Oh, come on.
Henry.

What? Don't you like Amy with bigger breasts?

Oh, God.

She has bigger breasts.
I hate that you've noticed.

It's not just me. Everyone's noticed. She's hot.

She's not hot. I mean, she's always been hot.

Now she's hotter, really.
She's nursing.

I don't care what she's doing. It's working for her.

When did you become obsessed with breasts?

And don't talk about my wife like that.

Everyone's talking about her like that.
She's the talk of the school.

Go home, Henry. Just go home.

Why? What'd I do?

And don't hate me because I'm sexually active.

One day, you, too, will have sex
with your girlfriend... or wife.

All right. Good night.

Breasts.

Oh...

Well, I loved meeting Ben and his little friends.

They're nice kids.

Yeah. Especially Ben.

I hope he liked me.

I don't care. I like you, and you like me,

and that's all that matters.
That's all that matters.

To me.
To you.

You are one of a kind, Betty.

So, tell me how you got into the sausage business.

I love meat.

What's to tell?
Tell me how you became The Sausage King.

It's a long story. You don't want to hear that.

And, besides, every date, we talk about me.

Somehow you turn every conversation back to me.

Let's talk about you for a change.

How did you become a court reporter?

I just have very good fingers.

You know, that's a really nice, uh...

What do you call it?

Blouse?
Breasts.

I wasn't looking at your breasts.

Really? I bought this blouse just so you would.

You don't have to seduce me.

I'm as attracted to you now as I was in high school.

Well, we're not in high school anymore,

and life has gotten a lot more complicated.

Our lives were pretty complicated in high school.

I should've married you.

But it wouldn't have lasted.

You would've felt trapped.
Maybe.

But we're not in high school now.

And I can't marry you now.

I'm still married.

I don't want to interrupt your evening, but

I have a test tomorrow.

The walls are thin. I can hear everything you're saying.

And not that it's any of my business,

but, um, if you two aren't going to get married,

maybe you should just move in together.

She is a smart girl.
Very smart girl.

But not as smart as her mother.

Hi, Ricky. I'm studying.

I'm going over to see John.
Then I thought maybe I'd drop by.

Ruben's here. Again.
Again?

You know what? You should just
get emancipated and get your own place.

You're all grown up now.

You're a father. You need a place.

I had a place. Then you got your mother
back together with your father,

and now neither of us have a place.

If they decide to move in together,

maybe they'll let me stay here
until the real estate market goes back up,

and then we can be alone again.

Okay. One, I doubt they'd let you do that,

and two, unless the real estate
market goes up by 11:00 tonight,

it's not going to do me much good.

Oh, hold on. I have another call. Hang on.

I'll call you later.

Hello, Grace.

I hope this is important. I was talking to Ricky.

It is important.

Jack and I are having sex for the first time.

And you're calling me right in the middle
of having sex for the first time?

No. I mean tonight.

Tonight is the night!

I just thought I'd call and let you know.

Okay. Do you have any last-minute advice?

Yeah. Don't do it.

What?

Don't do it.
Why not?

Because once you do it, it's over.

That's it. And there's only one first time.

And I know you, Grace.

You're not ready to have sex.

Yes, I am. I've been on the pill for a month,

and he's also going to use a condom. And...

we're ready.
No, you're not.

You are not ready. You're prepared.

You have the birth control to protect you,

but you're not mentally or emotionally ready for this.

Yes, I am. I've been praying about it for a long time,

and I know, in my heart, that it's perfectly
okay for me to express my love for Jack.

There are other ways to express your love.

You have sex. Why shouldn't I have sex?

Because I'm me, and you're you.

I thought you'd be happy for me.

No, I'm not happy for you.

Fine. Thanks for being my friend.

I am your friend.

Or, I'm trying to be your friend, anyway.

Then just tell me you're happy for me.

Hi. I'm here.

They're in there.

I hear. What's little John so upset about?

I don't know. What's in the bag?

Brought you girls something to eat.

I was grilling steaks for my family tonight, so...

Baked potato in there, too, with bacon bits.

Thank you. All I've had is soup.

You're welcome.

Can you believe it? The second
he touches him, he stops crying.

Makes me crazy.

Well, maybe if you weren't so upset,
John wouldn't be so upset.

You're hardly in a position
to give me advice, don't you think?

Yeah, I do think. I'm still your mother.

How did this happen, Mom?

I don't understand how this
could happen, especially at your age.

Wow.

David's going to fire you when
he finds out you're pregnant.

David is my boyfriend.

He's not my boss.

I'm a consultant to David's firm
as well as to other firms yet to be found.

And even if David were just
my boss and not my boyfriend,

he couldn't fire me just because I'm pregnant.

So, as a consultant, do you have insurance?

Yeah, I do have insurance. I
have insurance with your dad.

And how long is that going to last when he
finds out you're having someone else's baby?

Are you sure you're not just going
through menopause or something?

Would that throw off the pregnancy test?

I love you, Amy,

but mind your own teenage business, all right?

Is that meat?

Do I smell meat?

Mom! Did Ricky bring you that?

Us! He brought it for us.

I told him I made you soup.

Well, soup is not enough, Amy. I'm pregnant.

Wow.

That's great.

Congratulations.

I guess.

Love you.
Love you.

I'm... I'm not going to answer that.

Are you expecting someone?
Kind of.

You didn't lock the front door?

You think you're ready to have sex with a guy,

and you're not even careful
enough to lock the front door?

Hi, Adrian.

You told her?

Thanks, Adrian.

I thought we weren't going to tell anyone.

Can I talk to you?

I think you already talked to her, didn't you?

Just give me a minute, please.

Grace, I think it's the two of us who need a minute.

Adrian, I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

Ask all you want. I'm not leaving.

Adrian, you're ruining this very special night for me.

For us.

You're completely and totally ruining everything.

Good. As your best friend, that's my job.

Why don't you two best friends talk to each other?

I think I'll go.

This probably wasn't a good idea anyway.

The timing didn't feel right.
The timing didn't feel right?

We've been talking about doing this all year.

Yeah, I know.

But it just isn't the right time.

For me, anyway.

All right. I'll talk to you later, Grace.

You make me so angry, I want to spit!

Better than being so angry,
you have sex before you're ready.

I am ready!
I know why you're doing this.

Because your parents told you
they don't want you to do this.

No. My dad doesn't want me to do this.

My mom doesn't want me to do it, either, but...

She's a woman. She understands.

I don't understand. You're a Christian.

You're supposed to wait until you get married.

I can be Christian and have sex before I get married.

I'm in a committed relationship. I'm in love.

And one day, I am going to marry Jack.

This is the only guy you've ever really dated.

Hello! Ricky.

What about Ricky?

You never really dated him.

You've never dated anyone but Jack.

Fine. Going with that logic,
I've never dated anyone but Jack,

and I never will.

Adrian, this is between Jack and me,

not you and me,

and Jack and I are okay with this.

Of course he's okay with it. He's a guy.

All guys are okay with it.

Look... listen to me, Grace.

You are a good example for every girl
who wants to wait to have sex until she's married.

I'm not a poster girl for virginity, okay?

I'm not some spokeswoman
for abstinence. I'm just me.

And I understand these life choices,

and I have been a proponent of waiting until marriage.

However, I can no longer wait.

Because?
Because I need sex.

Ohh!

I want sex. I feel like having sex!

And you know what, Adrian?
Those feelings come from love.

And God is love. And I feel sure that God
is okay with my making love to Jack.

But why are you in such a hurry?

I'm not in a hurry.

We've been thinking about having
sex for the whole school year.

Jack's been doing more than thinking about it.

He's been having sex for the whole school year.

Not with me.
I get it now.

If you have sex with Jack, you think
he won't have sex with anyone else.

He won't.
He might.

I've been reading a lot lately, and...

He won't.

I'm sure that once he and I are together,
he's never going to go anywhere else.

Grace, sex is not a competition.

You can't keep Jack just by having sex with him.

My God, is that a hooker he's with?

I doubt it. He told me he had a girlfriend.

Come on.

Hey, Leo.

Hey. Hi there.

Hi, Leo.
Hi, Ashley, George.

I'd like you to meet my friend. Uh, this is Betty.

Betty, this is Ashley and George, Amy's sister and dad.

Pleased to meet you.

I heard all about your little Amy.

How is the baby?

Huh?

The baby is fine. John.

John? What John?

The baby. His name's John.

Oh, right. I knew that.

Ben sent me a text.

He's going over to say good night to them.

He's over there every time Ricky's over there.

Hey, it's a tough situation for my boy.

You two like to join us?

Oh, we wouldn't dream of it.

You enjoy yourselves. Nice meeting you, Betty.

I wish I could meet a girl like that.

I don't think it would be too difficult.

There's probably one on every street corner.

The man's been widowed for five years.
Why shouldn't he go out on a date?

Well, there's dating, and then there's dating.

What makes you think she's a hooker?
She's got "hooker"

written all over her.
No, she doesn't.

You don't know anything about hookers, I hope.

Look who just came in. The joint's a-jumping.

Jesus, Roark.

It's David.
The Fountainhead.

I knew that.

Let's invite him to eat with us.

No. I hate that guy.

I don't. I think he's great.

You only think he's great
if he's the father of the baby.

He's the father.
You hope.

No, I know.

I'll be right back. Order anything you want.

Hey, look who's here.

Oh. George. Hi.

So, is Anne meeting you here, or are you drinking alone?

You know I come here.

And, no, Anne is not joining me tonight.

She said Mimsy was in town and that
she was tired and wanted to go home.

Well, Mimsy left, and I bet Ann
was tired and wanted to go home.

Probably wanted to get that weight off her feet, huh?

I beg your pardon?
Come on. She's gained weight.

A lot of weight.
Who?

"Who." Your girlfriend, my soon-to-be ex-wife, Anne.

I'm not going to discuss Anne's weight with you.

I'm not even going to discuss Anne with you.

Hey, hey, don't get upset.

I'm just reaching out to you in your time of need.

"Time of need"?
You know what I'm talking about.

No, I don't know what you're talking about.

Are you and Anne expecting?
"Expecting?"

It's like talking to a brick wall. Hey, that's kind of funny.

You being an architect and all. "Brick wall."

I got it, George.
And yet you don't got it.

Anne's pregnant.

Congratulations.

Scotch. Something fancy and old. Straight up.

That about right?

Maybe.

I got to get back to my daughter.

But that Anne... she makes beautiful babies.

Wait, wait. Did Anne tell you that she and I are pregnant?

No, but I'm not stupid. I know she's pregnant.

I've seen her pregnant before.

Any possibility that she's pregnant with your baby?

Nope.

Enjoy your drink.

I just... I had to come by and
say good night to you and John, so...

Wow.

Uh, Ricky's in my room with John.

Think you might be moving him into the nursery soon?

Uh, John, the baby, not Ricky.

I don't know. You know, he still
wakes up in the middle of the night,

and it's so much easier just to reach over and pick him up.

Why?

I'm just... I'm not that comfortable with
Ricky hanging out in your room all the time.

What?

Ben, he's not in there for me, he's in there for John.

Okay.

You want some soup?

There's leftover soup from dinner.

Soup? I thought I smelled steak.

Yeah. Ricky brought over a steak for my mom...and me.

Oh, did he?

Was it rib eye? He bought rib eyes at the shop today.

I should've known he was trying to suck up to your mother.

Why would he be sucking up to my mother?

Oh, I don't know. So he can get closer to you.

Jeez. Really, Ben? What is going on with you?

You've never been this jealous
before. I don't know if I like it.

What are you staring at?
Nothing.

I know what you were looking at.

Well, it's not exactly as if you're
trying to hide anything lately.

Excuse me?
I think we should talk.

Before anybody gets really upset here,

let's just talk about this.

About... this?

I want to have sex.

I guess I showed up at a bad time.

I just wanted to say good night.

Amy, Ben, night.

I just had a baby.

Hey. Thanks for coming over.

You're so good with him... with John.

No problem.

I can stay over, if you want,
and take care of him all night

so you can get some sleep.

I can sleep on that chair in your room.

No. It's okay.

He should be all right now. At least for a few hours.

And, besides, if anybody's going to
sleep in Amy's room, it's going to be me.

Should I tell your driver? I think he's waiting for you.

I'm in driver's ed, you know. I'll be driving soon.

Yeah, if you can pass the test.

Will the two of you just leave, please?

You can sort this out at the butcher
shop tomorrow on your own time.

Oh, no! How does he know when he leaves?

Did Ricky leave?
Obviously.

Hello.
Hey, sweetie.

Hi.
Hi.

What's going on?
Nothing.

Or everything. Can I come over?

Well, I'm already ready for bed and,

besides, I'll see you tomorrow at work.

I don't know if this can wait for work.

Are you pregnant?
Are you drunk?

I asked you first.

Well, we'll talk about it when you're not drunk.

Is that a yes?
Where are you?

Do you want me to call you a taxi?

No. I can get a ride home from George.

Why they all flying on that little jet?

Why they don't fly on a big jet?

They're doctors.

They can afford a big jet and a big airport.

Well, that's Dr. Sigay's private jet.

He owns it, and he's a pilot.

It doesn't seem right to fly

to a Third World country on a private jet.

Tom.

All right. I should've stayed home.

Why didn't you?

I don't want to be there when

Grace has sex with Jack.

Grace is not going to have sex with Jack.

She's not ready to have sex with Jack.

I don't think that matters anymore.

She's just going to do it

because she wants to do it.

Tom?
Hi, honey. It's me.

We just got your dad on the plane.
I wanted to see how you are.

I'm fine. When are you coming home?

It's about a two-hour drive,
but Tom and I haven't eaten yet,

so we'll probably stop on the way.

You doing okay there?
Mm-hmm. I'm fine here.

Grace, they haven't taken off yet,

if you want to give your dad a call.

I do not want to give him a call.

Stop trying to make me apologize to him.

Why can't we just have a
difference of opinion like two adults?

Because you're not an adult, and he's your father.

And, for some reason, you suddenly
have no respect for his opinion.

I respect his opinion.

It's just my life.

I just don't like that he's going away on a long trip,

and the two of you are at odds with each other.

He thinks I'm a child. He's treating me like a child.

He's not treating you like a child

because he's suggesting that you wait
a while longer before you and Jack...

Do it!

I'll talk to him when he gets back.

I'll be older when he gets back.

A whole week older.

You are being very stubborn, Grace.

So is he.

He doesn't get to make this decision for me.

We'll be home around midnight.

Don't wait up. It's a school night.
All right.

Love you, Mom.
I love you, Grace.

Me, too.

You sure about this?

I'm sure.

I'm absolutely sure.

In sports, the National Hockey League

featured a busy five...

Hi.

My cell phone battery's dead. I just thought I could...

Plug it in here?
All right.

Just tell Adrian I came by, if you don't mind.

No, I don't mind.

But, uh, why don't you come in and wait for her?

Oh, I don't think so.
I said come in...

and wait for her.

Sit down.

Maybe I should go.
Or maybe we should talk.

All right. What do you want to talk about?

How's John?
He's okay.

He doesn't sleep through the night yet,

but that's to be expected with a boy at his age.

He'll get there.

Not before Amy loses her mind, but he'll get there.

And how are you doing with balancing school,

a job, going over to take care of him?

It's almost the end of the year.

My grades may have slipped a little,

but not enough to wreck my averages.

And the job's great. I love that job.

Working at the butcher shop?
Yeah.

What do you love about it?
I'm doing something that's useful to someone,

and I'm making some money.

Any further questions, Your Honor?

Hey, I'm just making small talk.
Why?

Why not?

You're sleeping with my daughter.

Maybe we should get to know each other.

Unless, of course, you don't intend to
be with Adrian the rest of your life.

In which case, you shouldn't be sleeping with her.

What's going on?

I was at the library 'cause I thought you'd
still be here, arguing with my mother.

Nothing's going on, so I'll be leaving now.

Ruben.
Adrian.

Don't you have to go home?
Back to my hotel room? No.

I might even sleep on the couch.

Fine. Ricky and I are going to talk in my room.

How long have you been here?

Long enough to become uninterested in having sex.

Oh, we can still have sex. He knows we have sex.

I'm not having sex with you while your
father's sitting on your living room couch.

I'll make you forget that.
No, you can't.

I can.

I'm going to go, okay? Maybe tomorrow night.

Bye.
Bye.

So you're not going to have sex tonight?

I hope it wasn't something I said.

What are you doing here, anyway?

That would be your business?
I could say the same to you.

You haven't been around for 16 years,

and now it's your business if I'm here with Adrian.

I've known her longer than you have.

I know more about her than you do.

Yeah, I may have gotten a girl pregnant
that I didn't want to marry,

but I'm there for my kid.

Hey, Cindy wanted to get pregnant.

She wanted to trap me.

And then when I offered to marry her,
she didn't want to get married.

She didn't even let me know when Adrian was born.

I see.

You offered to marry her,

and she missed out because she
didn't take you up on your offer.

I'm sure the offer must've made her feel very special.

Or it made her feel so insignificant

and out of control, she just refused
to have anything to do with you.

Is that what she said?
What?

No. That's what I said.

I happen to know a little something about women.

They don't want an offer.

They want to be loved. And you do, too.

You walked out on the best thing you could've had,

and you went looking for it over and over and over again.

Don't you come over here and hurt Adrian again,

because you've already hurt her enough
by not being around her whole life.

Good night.

You should've just gone back to your hotel
room so I could have sex with my boyfriend,

'cause you're never going to be able
to get what he just said out of your head.

Ben?

You awake?

No.

Well, wake up. I want to tell you something.

What?
I'm in love.

Dad.

I am. I'm in love with Betty.

I just want you to know that.
And I have to know that now?

Yes. I wanted to tell you now so that when
you run into Betty at the breakfast table,

it won't be quite so awkward.

Oh, Dad...

isn't it a little soon?

I haven't been with a woman in...

a long time.

It's not too soon, believe me.

Good night, Ben.
Good night.

What?

Happen to have a condom?

Wow. I'm an optimist.

Me, too.

You gave her the key?
No.

Amy?
Yes.

Dad!

Where have you two been? It's a school night.

Who are you, and what are you doing in my kitchen?

We need to talk.

And, Ashley, you need to go to bed and get some sleep

and not listen to the conversation
I'm about to have with your father,

no matter how loud it gets.

All right.

Can I get you anything?

Sardines and ice cream, perhaps?
I'm not pregnant.

Okay.
And if I am pregnant,

I would let you know, and
I would let my boyfriend know.

I don't need for you to let him know.
Okay.

I'm not pregnant.
You just said that.

Who are you trying to convince?
Me.

Did you not want to get pregnant?

Why would I want to get pregnant?

I just started my life.

Looks to me like you got a little buddy
joining you there, with your new life.

George, there's no chance that...

You're absolutely sure that
the vasectomy worked, right?

We've been having sex for
10 years since my vasectomy,

and you never got pregnant,
so don't try blaming this one on me.

I just want to make sure.
Are you having unprotected sex with David?

I really don't feel comfortable talking
about my sex life with you.

Yeah, I can imagine.

You want to spend the night?

With you?
No, not with me.

But you can have my bedroom since you're
probably not getting a lot of sleep over there,

and since you're pregnant
and pregnant women need sleep.

Hello.
Hey. Is Mom there?

Yep.

Yes, Amy.

Could you help me get John back to bed?

Every time I put him down, he starts crying again.

No, I can't.

I'm tired. Call Ricky.

It's after midnight.

Yes, it is, Amy, and I need to get some sleep.

So do I, Mom.

I'm coming over.
Thanks, Dad.

How is she supposed to learn anything when
you go and do something crazy like this?

Now I'm supposed to be the good example?

So I can go to sleep in your room?
Anytime.

I knew you were pregnant. You got that glow thing.

Congratulations. Are you happy?

I guess.

Happiness is overrated, anyway.

Does Ashley know?

Afraid so.
How could everyone know but me?

Denial?
It doesn't make sense.

David and I were careful.

Very careful. Doubly careful.

Things happen.

Are you okay?
I'm fine.

You sure? You look a little disappointed.

No.

I'm just exhausted.

It took a lot of energy.

I had no idea it would be like that.

Yeah, I didn't either.

I didn't expect you to be quite so...aggressive.

Yeah.

I... I don't know. I...

I thought it might be embarrassing or

hurt or something, but...

I don't... I don't know. Once...

Once we got going,

and I got over my fear,

I liked it...

a lot.

I wish we had time to do it again.

Really?
Yeah.

I feel... I don't know...

like, set free or something.

Really?
Yeah.

Jack, you were great.

I was kind of jealous that
you've been with other women,

but maybe it worked to my benefit,

'cause you made me feel totally comfortable,

and you were quite sensitive to my needs,

and skillful.

Thank you, Grace.

And, um, how do you feel emotionally?

I hate to run out and leave you alone.
Emotionally?

I feel stronger than I ever have.

I feel satisfied.

I feel no shame.

It's a natural and beautiful thing.

And it's fun, too.

You make me so happy.

No, you make me so happy.

I love you.

I love sex.
All right!

Well, as soon as we're of
legal age, let's get married.

'Cause I would love to marry
a woman who loves sex as much.

Good night.
Good night, Grace.

I love you.
I love you, too.

Oh, no.

Jack, where's Grace?

She's upstairs, and she's fine.

He's dead.

What? No, no, no. No one's dead. We just had sex.

What? You had sex?

Jack, Marshall's dead!

Mom, don't cry. I'm fine.

You k*lled him!

What?

Do I stink? You know, I haven't
showered in 24 hours.

Good morning, little fella.

Wow. Dad, did you do all this?
I was up anyway.

Dad, thank you. I... I really, really appreciate it.

No problem. Is that what
you're wearing to school?

Yes. Is there something wrong with it?

Yes, there's something wrong with it.

Have you been talking to Ben?
No, I've been talking to Mimsy,

and she thinks you and your mother been
showing off your figures a little too much.

Our figures?
You know what I'm saying.

Cover up, kid. You're a mom now,

and you don't want to be a mom again,

not when your mom's going to be a mom.

She told you?
I knew.

Well, yeah, we all knew. I'm just shocked.

Well, I think your mom's a little shocked, too.

And I don't think this was planned,
so don't make her feel bad.

You owe her.
Yeah, I know that.

I'm trying. I'm trying to do
for her what she did for me,

even though I shouldn't have to.

Well, she shouldn't have had to, either.

Ames, your mom is a good woman,

and she's been through a lot.

And I don't know how this
happened, but it doesn't matter.

We're all going to support each other's mistakes,

because that's what a family is.

Apparently our family makes a few
more mistakes than other families...

not that our little John here was a mistake...

but you never know what's going to be
good for the world around you and what isn't.

So don't judge her. You got it?
Yeah. I got it.

You do stink.

I know. I've been up all night with someone's son.

Someone's grandson. Just hold him for another minute.

Let me just grab some breakfast.

Amy, it's baby first. Always baby first.

Cereal. I'm just getting cereal.

It'll take two seconds.

Hello.
George, I have terrible news.

Yeah, I know. You told me last night.

This isn't funny.

Who d*ed?
Someone did die.

Oh, God. It's not Ashley.

No, George.

Hi.
Did you turn on the news this morning?

No.

There was a plane crash.

Oh, God.
No, no. Not your mom.

It's not your mom.

All right. Then who was it?

Please, not another t*rror1st att*ck.

No, Adrian.

No. It was a private jet.

Oh, no.

Oh. Good morning.

Morning, Ben. But it's not a good one.

Bad night? Things didn't go well with Betty?

It's not Betty.

Things went fine with Betty.
Then who had a bad night?

Ben, I don't know how to tell you this, but

I just got some sad news.

Not Amy. Dad, please not Amy.

No. Amy and John are fine.

It's okay, Mom.

I'm here for you.

It's okay.

Eat something.

You will feel better.

Thank you, Tom.

But, uh,

I don't think I'm going to feel
better for a very long time.

Dad is in heaven.

He's okay.

He's probably playing golf

with Jesus.

Yeah.

He probably is. He probably is.

I remember when

my birth mom d*ed.

It was a terrible time.

You took care of me,

and now I will take care of you.

But who's going to take care of Grace?

Who's going to take care of Grace?

I don't know if we can.

I don't know how she's going to get through this.

I'm sor...

I'm... I'm sorry, Dad.

I'm sorry.