02x02 - Ship of Vipers

[bunniefuu]

[narrator] Previously on Dynasty:

I intend to spend every dime I have
before they put me in the ground.

-What do you want?
-Get my money, or I'm going to the cops.

Take it.
That's what you came for, isn't it?

You are obsessed with that family.
You should claim to be Cristal Flores.

-I may have gotten someone pregnant.
-This baby is what I need.

You're unbelievable, Sam.

I'll tell you what's unbelievable.
The fact that a premenopausal woman

got knocked up
by a gay man she slept with once.

I sent you away
because I thought you would be better off

in Australia with your mother.
I still think that's the case.

-Kirby Anders, all grown up.
-Thanks for letting me crash.

[Liam] Uncle Max.

I'm sure Liam mentioned,
you get on my bad side,

you'll wish you never heard
of the Van Kirks.

I'm lucky to have Liam's help.

He's lucky he has a wife
who's heir to an empire I wanna buy.

Fallon Carrington,
will you finally do me the honor

of being my wife?

Uncle Max is flying us to see my family.
They can't wait to meet my wife.

Okay, so we've covered
your great-uncle Roger.

-Yup.
-Your cousins Carter and Marsha.

Anyone else you need to warn me about
before I meet the Van Kirk clan?

I mean, I have a niece, Emily.

She's like every girl
you went to prep school with.

Can you tell me why
your uncle has so many enemies

that he needs armed guards?

I think it's about the quality of enemies
versus quantity.

That makes me feel better.

Now you know why I live in Atlanta.

But I love my family.
And Max's wife, Maura, is really sweet.

Though I think she might still be away
at the spa.

Oh, I know that code.

Listen, let's just get through this.

Get Max to sign the contract
so your family can own Carrington Atlantic

and I can stop having to memorize
the quirks of your relatives.

I'm on board.

But since my entire family thinks
that we're married,

we might have to actually kind of act
like we like each other.

We can just hold hands.

Whoa. That thing is sharp.
What happened to the ring I gave you?

Culhane replaced it with this one.
He proposed to me last night. I said yes.

-[cell phone buzzing]
-Oh.

-Hi.
-[Culhane] Hey, how's it going, babe?

I confirmed with the Plaza.

Liam and I have separate rooms.
We're not even on the same floor.

Fallon, we're engaged. I trust you.
That's not why I'm calling.

Apparently,
your father has some announcement.

After sleeping on it,
I realized we should talk

about what happened
at the anniversary party.

I'm glad you came to your senses.
That "Blake time" thing was embarrassing.

-Apology accepted.
-[Blake] Oh, I am not apologizing.

-Blake time is real.
-Did you have Anders trademark it?

I spent the morning mapping out

how I'm going to spend all of my money
or die trying.

Which includes changing my will
and cutting you all out of it.

What? I just got in it.

-Are you kidding?
-No, I am not.

After the sale of the company,
you will have plenty of money,

which means you will get no more from me,
including after I am dead.

That's eternal Blake time.

Tell them what happens next.

Mr. Carrington has directed that any money
left over will be buried with him

in the mausoleum.

-In case they take cash in hell?
-Do we need a 72-hour psych hold?

I have never been saner.

Morning. Hmm.

[sighs]

When did you sneak out?

Oh, yeah. More than once.
Didn't you hear them?

Mother, you realize I can see your nipples
from New York, right?

-Would you like me to get you a robe?
-I am perfectly comfortable.

-Does this mean we can eat now?
-Does this mean I can go now?

-Uh... Me too.
-[Blake] You can do whatever you want.

Anders and I will be spending the day
replacing the cars I lost in the fire.

Did you do anything exciting last night?

[Monica] Oh, good, you made coffee.

I've been up since 5 trying
to get everything done for tomorrow.

The DJ's booked. You hired extra security.
Are you forgetting something?

If I could think of it,
it wouldn't be forgotten.

Look, you only get to open this club once,
with our name on it.

I get that you built your fortune
on an app that never saw the light of day.

And like you, I wanna build a real name
for us, apart from the Carringtons.

But you've got to trust me. Okay?

-I've got this.
-[Kirby] Monica?

It's me.

Kirby. Anders.

It's so good to see you.

I just came out to get some clothes.

You could definitely use some.

Jeff has been telling me
about the club you're opening.

-Congrats.
-Thanks.

He also mentioned
you might need extra help.

And I worked at a ton of clubs back home.

It's like karma. [chuckles]
You need help. I need a job.

I think you mean kismet.

The last time I saw you,
you were being exiled from Atlanta

for attempted arson.

If you were me, would you hire you?

First of all, digging your honesty.
But I was never the crazy one.

Let me guess. It was Fallon.

I heard about what happened
between your two families,

-so who's the common denominator?
-That was Blake. Fallon and I are in a good place,
so don't go there.

But you probably could use an extra set
of hands, for today at least.

Right?

Fine. But no promises about the future.

Whatever you need, I can do it.
I'll just get changed.

You slept with Dirty Kirby?

Come on, that's just some bitchy nickname
Fallon gave her.

And the fact that she almost
burnt down Carrington Manor?

It was a long time ago.
Kids love playing with fire.

-People change.
-Clearly.

Kirby's sleeping with guys now, for one.

I'd do it all over again
if I could save poor Celia.

You mean Cristal Flores?

Well, who is she, really?
A tortured soul with a hard life.

Stolen identity.

[maid] It's another one.

-How can I help you?
-[Cristal Jennings] Yes...

I'd like to speak to Mr. Blake Carrington
if possible.

My name is Cristal Jennings.

I'm sorry, Ms. Jennings,

but the Cristal Flores gravy train
has left the station.

-Good luck next time.
-No, you don't understand.

If I could just talk
to Mr. Blake Carrington.

The answer is no.

[line disconnects]

[sighs]

[tapping]

Sam. What are you doing up here?

I can't stop thinking
about what you told me.

I'm worried Melissa Daniels is a liar.

You should be.
She is a lying, thieving predator.

The thing I didn't tell you...

is that she slept with Steven
when he was only 18. Was that before or after
you slept with her husband?

The point is, she's not getting any money
in the divorce,

so when she looks at Steven,
she sees dimples and dollar signs.

I have doubts that she's pregnant
with anything other than carbs.

We can't tell Steven until we have proof.
He'll think I'm petty and vindictive.

I can't imagine why.

[cell phone buzzes]

You know what they say.
Keep your enemies close.

So, ingratiate yourself with Melissa.

Maybe she'll slip up
and we'll catch her in a lie.

-This is insane. I'm not a detective.
-Well, maybe you can be now.

Law and Order: Fashion Victim.

[Fallon] Thank you. Aww.
Thank you. Yours, too.

I hope you know that half
that wedding-present money is mine, right?

Well, maybe if you're lucky.

Thank you.

Hey.

What are you trying to do,
consummate the marriage?

[Max] Fallon.

-Oh, Uncle Max, hi.
-Come here. Come here.

-Hey.
-Hey.

-Wow.
-Max, let the poor girl go.

You're suffocating her.

Liam. [Liam] Aunt Maura.

And this must be Fallon Carrington.

Are those extensions?

-Uh... No, all mine. Nice to meet you.
-[Max] I would like to make a toast.

To the marriage of the Van Kirks
and the Carringtons,

both personally and,
once I sign the paperwork, professionally.

Cheers.

And I'd like to add just a few words
of my own.

As you may know, I've been away
for the last couple of months,

recovering from exhaustion.

So, I just found out about all of this.

I may not have a vote in this acquisition,
but I do have an opinion.

And I think we would be foolish

to get mixed up
with this kind of new money.

New money?

My great-grandfather
started Carrington Atlantic.

We just celebrated our hundredth year.

Doesn't make you old money.
It makes you lucky.

And your father is clearly an imbecile.

Why else would he leave the company

in the hands of some diamond-encrusted
CEO Barbie?

Okay, that's enough, Maura.

Darling, I agree.
Our family should k*ll this deal today.

Or else I'll go to the press tomorrow
and k*ll it myself.

But in the meantime,

congrats to the happy couple.

I'd forgotten how fun it is to register.

-Right?
-Yes.

-It was the best part of getting married.
-[Melissa laughs]

-Second best.
-Here, Steven, pick something you like.

Yeah...

Oh, yeah. This bouncy bungee-cord thing
could be fun, right?

Yeah. It's possibly an accident
waiting to happen.

Yeah, I'm not even sure
why they're selling that.

Great. Good to know
my fatherly instincts are on the money.

To be fair, I don't think
my dad knew what to do with us

until we were old enough to golf,
and even then.

[Melissa] You're gonna be a great father.

Our baby is already so lucky
just to be a Carrington.

So, how are you feeling these days,
Melissa?

'Cause you look perfectly fine.

It's weird that you haven't been sick,
isn't it?

Well, the first trimester was not pretty,
believe me.

Oh. Have you thought more
about tomorrow night?

The prenatal meditation class?

I thought that was more
of a mother-baby thing.

Are you kidding? That sounds amazing.

-We could host it here.
-[gasps]

We never have enough pregnant women
around the Manor,

and it could be fun.

And real bonding time for all of us.

-I love it.
-Just let me think about it.

[Blake]
What are you driving these days, Anders?

Maybe it's time
we got you some new wheels.

Hey. What about this Bel Air, right here?

Very generous, but completely unnecessary.

Oh, no. That is where we disagree.

I wasn't kidding
about spending all my money.

-Anything look good, Mr. Carrington?
-Everything looks good, Charlie.

Here's the list of cars
that I need to replace.

Tough break with that fire.

Well, that's what I get
for storing my cars in a stable. What can you tell me
about those two gull-wings back there?

I think Mr. Anders here
has his eye on one.

-Exquisite.
-Takes you back, doesn't it?

-Which one were you looking at?
-Both.

-I'd like to corner the market.
-Well, there is one more left, actually.

It's in circulation
with a private collector in Florida.

Anders, looks like
we'll be making some calls to Florida.

-She's usually very sweet, I promise.
-Yeah, real bag of sugar.

[Max] Everything is fine.

Maura just had a long flight.
She's exhausted.

I have to apologize for my wife.

I don't care what you do
as long as the deal isn't in jeopardy.

Well, not anymore, thanks to me.

Well, then you are officially my favorite
of the Van Kirks. No offense, sweetie.

Did she say why she freaked out?

Apparently, her family had
business dealings with your father

that didn't go over well.

I knew nothing about that.

But once I told her
he didn't approve of the deal,

-she perked right up.
-Well, look at that.

My dad acting like a complete ass
finally pays off for me.

It only took 25 years.

So, now can we sign the contract
and move forward?

What is it with you?
Nothing but business, business, business.

We're in New York. Let's celebrate, okay?

You gotta be getting sick and tired
of that Southern food.

Okay, fine.

But we are stopping at Bergdorf's.
Barbie needs to change her outfit.

["Don't Stop Get It"
playing over speakers]

Sorry, but I thought these guys would work
harder if there was more energy.

Wait, what?

I was just saying I finished everything
you asked me to do.

And I even started
to consolidate the guest list.

Hope you don't mind.
You know, initiative and all that.

That guest list is worthless.

Well, you didn't even look at it,
and... I used a special font.

Migos is playing a surprise show
at Purgatory tomorrow.

-I don't understand.
-Migos? They're a hip-hop group?

I'm from Australia, not Antarctica.
But what's Purgatory?

A club three blocks from here.
This is not coincidence. It's sabotage.

-What are we gonna do?
-We aren't gonna do anything.

I'm gonna call a booker friend
and see who I can get to play here

on 24 hours' notice.

Hold down the fort.

I'm gonna fix this.

[Hank] I want my million,
not some picture.

As much as I value your knowledge
of fine art, Hank,

this is not just a picture.

-It's a Rembrandt.
-But when do I get actual money?

Being an idiot
is not gonna make it happen any faster.

This painting is collateral.

Well, great. Where do I sell it,
some kind of art store?

You don't sell it anywhere, moron.
You couldn't if you wanted to.

Do you not understand
what collateral means?

Maybe... not.

It means that you hold on to this
until I get you the money next month.

Then you give me back the painting,
and I return it to Carrington Manor.

-So, I'm not selling it?
-No.

Between the insurance payment
and Blake, I will get you real money.

But in the meantime, you lay low,

you be quiet about our deal,
or the two of us are gonna end up in jail.

Seems kind of small to be worth anything.
Do you have any bigger ones?

Wow. I didn't realize
my nephew had such good taste.

How many carats is this?

Well, a gentlemen never tells.

Since I'm not one,
I'll tell you it's a little north of nine.

[all laugh]

[cell phone buzzes]

Ah. Excuse me.

-Hello?
-This has been great, Max.

Please let me get the bill.
To thank you for saving the deal.

The bill has already
been taken care of, dear.

But if you really wanna thank me,

come to my penthouse tomorrow for dinner.

Maura's out at the Hamptons
with some girlfriends.

[Liam] Sorry about that.

Did I miss anything?

Just business as usual.

I should get back to the office,
but you two...

You should take her to the Met.

They got a couple of new Picassos.
They're beautiful.

Maybe we'll check it out.

Did you know Marie-Thérèse Walter was 17
when Picasso started sleeping with her?

He was 45, and married, incidentally.

Well, nobody's perfect, right?

I suppose we could all forgive a genius
for an indiscretion or two.

You two have fun, okay?

Uh... Max?

I think you dropped this.

-Oh.
-[Fallon] It's such a beautiful day.

we'll check out the park.
I look forward to hearing from your team,

or maybe you'll hear from mine.

This one keeps you on your toes,
doesn't she?

Oh...

This is stupid. I followed Melissa
through the grocery store,

and then some old lady hit me
with her cart in the freezer aisle.

-It's definitely gonna bruise.
-I need you to focus, dear.

What did you find out?

I don't know what smoking g*n
you think we're going to find,

but I'm guessing it's not smoked turkey.

Or brie. Now I'm just hungry.

She's buying deli meat?

A pregnant woman
isn't supposed to eat cold cuts, Sam.

-Oh.
-Or unpasteurized cheeses.

And where there's smoked turkey,
there's fire.

-We could do the Empire Club.
-You're a member?

Only to impress the girls.

Maybe 8? We can toast to your success.

I should make it an early night.
We can celebrate when the deal's closed.

-Of course. Don't wanna jinx anything.
-Right.

[phone beeps]

Do you know Northstone? Northstone Oil? Of course.

My uncle is having dinner
with them tonight.

What?

Why would he need another meeting
with an energy company

when he's about to own
Carrington Atlantic?

I don't know.

Maybe Maura was getting in his ear again?

Everything seemed great
when we left lunch.

Sorry to disturb you.

You're just the man I wanted to see.

I think we should build a track
for those cars.

Custom, just for us to race. Oh, I'll get right onto it.

I've been tracking the third gull-wing.

The buyer, as it turns out, is in Atlanta.

-And it may be a coincidence.
-What is it?

The buyer is Jeff Colby.

What does he want with that car?

I think it's less about the cars
and more about you.

Hi, I'm here to see Mr. Van Kirk.

-And, no, he's not expecting me.
-Fallon.

I just took my sleeping pill.
I have an early flight.

-I was looking for your husband.
-I'm sure you were.

I'm sorry to just show up unannounced.

It's just I needed to discuss
some of the details of our transaction,

and it's time-sensitive.

-Does Liam know you're here?
-We hadn't discussed it.

Max and I discuss everything.

He told me what you did.

I'm sorry, what did I do?

He told me you made a pass at him
in Atlanta.

You're kidding, right?

Do you think you're the first tramp
to go after my husband?

They all think he's an easy mark.

Handsome rich older man
stuck in a stale marriage.

But you're married to his nephew,
for God's sake.

If you don't have respect for yourself,
at least have some respect for Liam.

Look, I don't know
what your husband told you,

but he's the one
who's been crossing lines, not me. He's gotten to your head
if you think for one--

[keypad beeping]

[Max] Fallon. It's a little late
to be talking business, isn't it?

You're right.

Why don't we talk tomorrow night?

Leave that key with the doorman.
I'll be there.

[keypad beeps]

[people chattering]

-[man 1] Good night.
-[man 2] See you.

-Hold up. Hold up.
-Oh, I'm so sorry.

I know you're closing,
but I think I left my ID in the bathroom.

Can I run in and check?

Really quick? My Uber's gonna leave.

-All right, go ahead.
-Oh, thank you so much.

[squeaking]

I'm gonna call you Fallon.

How many people should I be expecting
for this meditation class tonight?

Sammy mentioned something
about it being hosted here.

Yeah, he's really embraced
this whole baby thing.

I'm starting to think
it's not a good idea.

The meditation class?
Or the whole baby thing?

I never have been good at meditation.

I don't wanna screw up another kid with...

-all of this.
-Well, I can assure you, you will.

Thanks for the honesty, I guess.

All parents screw up their kids.

I certainly did.

I'm sure this place had something
to do with it.

Well, I didn't do her any favors, though.

It's too late now.

You owe it to this baby
to give it your best.

And you owe it to yourself.

I'll call Melissa,
find out how many people are coming.

Cubano.

Just trust me.

-Huh?
-It's pretty good.

I used to walk through here on a break
while writing my book.

If my family knew, they probably
would've torn up the whole block.

Speaking of family,
have you talked to your uncle?

Called him this morning.
It was a big misunderstanding.

The Northstone guys heard about the CA
acquisition and asked for the meeting.

-He took it as a courtesy.
-Everything's on track?

He's meeting with his lawyers right now
to sign everything.

Oh, that's perfect. Now I don't have
to cancel my spa appointment.

-What, today?
-I need to get a facial before Monica's.

The city clogs my pores.
I'll meet you on the plane at 8?

Yeah. I might go check out
that Picasso exhibit.

Don't forget to take your ring off.
You might meet a cute art-history major.

See you later.

Bye.

If he can stay in Atlanta one more night,
we'll make it worth his while.

But I need to know in the next hour.

Yeah, call me back.

-Oh, my God. Did you hear about Purgatory?
-Don't tell me they got Beyoncé, too.

They got shut down.
Health-code violations.

Inspector found rats in the kitchen.

How gross is that?

Wait a second.

The Health Department
just happened to be at Purgatory?

Apparently, they got an anonymous tip.

-Did you have anything to do with that?
-Like I said, it was anonymous.

I know how important this place is to you.

I want you to know it means a lot to me
that you'd give me a chance.

Maybe we can find a place
for your initiative here.

[Fallon] It's good to see you again, Ally.

-You look great. I mean, so New York.
-Thank you.

I'm still an Atlanta girl at heart.

If you don't mind me asking,
how did you get into the, you know...?

-Escort business?
-Yes.

I assume you weren't doing this at Penley.

Oh, God, no.
No, I actually came here for fashion.

Then I started going to parties
and getting requests.

Realized I could make more in a month
than the lawyers and doctors I knew,

so here we are.

Speaking of which, what can I do for you?

Let's just say I have a date tonight,

one I have no intention
of taking to completion,

and I need somebody who can fill in.

-All right. And who's the guy?
-My uncle. In-law. Sort of.

And potential business partner.
Long story short, he's a real prize.

First he tries to get in my pants
even though I'm married to his nephew.

Then last night he convinced his wife
I was hitting on him.

I didn't sign on to this ship of vipers
to become the company whore.

I needed a contingency plan,
somebody on standby.

I'll wine and dine him,
butter him up, but...

if he wants more,
I'll tag out and tag her in.

You think he won't know the difference?

You'll have to get the right girl,
with my measurements.

Have her wear this. When he gets laid,

I get a very important signature

and your girl gets the biggest payday
of her life.

Everyone wins.

[Jeff] Always room for you, my friend.
Glad you can make it out tonight.

Hey, let me call you back.

What are you doing here, Blake?

What are you doing
buying a first-run gull wing in Florida?

You expect me to believe
it was a coincidence?

[chuckles]

Charlie and I are friends. We talk.

The whole town is talking
about your midlife crisis.

No crisis. It's just my turn.
My life has been about everyone else.

You really have the balls
to say that to me?

I'm not here to relitigate the past.
I just want the damn car.

You know you bought it to screw with me.

Fine. I'm happy to pay.
Just name your price.

Not for sale.

It's about time you learned
what the rest of us had to long ago.

-Can't always get what you want.
-Fine.

-I'll race you for it.
-Say what, now?

One of my gull-wings against yours.

I win, I take your car.
You win, you can have both of mine.

Now, what do you say
we raise the stakes a little? Hmm?

More than just money.

Name it.

Sorry about yesterday.
You caught me off guard.

-I thought you might be testing me.
-Earnest as earnest can be.

[Fallon chuckles]

I'm just glad you reconsidered.

Me, too.

I have to say, I admire your ingenuity,
convincing Maura to thr*aten the deal.

Don't worry about Maura.

She's in the country house for a week.
We've got the place to ourselves.

I can give you the grand tour.

Well, maybe you can show me
where you're keeping that signed contract.

-[chuckles] You have a one-track mind.
-[giggles]

But that's okay. So do I.

I'll have it for you in the morning,
barring any unexpected issues.

Well...

in that case, let's stay here.

Wow.

I have to say,
I like your proposal so far.

-Well, we're just getting started.
-Mmm.

What are you doing now?

-[shushes]
-[laughs]

The anticipation is k*lling me.

Give me your hand.

-What's that?
-Just a little jewelry.

[both laugh]

I knew you had some tricks up your sleeve.

[laughs] Well, I might have one more.

[handcuffs click]

[Fallon sighs]

Where you going?

Oh...

I'm going to turn on some music.
I like a real sensory experience.

I like the sound of that.

[soft instrumental music playing]

Don't get lost, now.

Don't worry. I'm right here.

This is our chance. Let's go.

Surveillance is one thing.
Breaking and entering is another.

It's not breaking if you have a key.

How did you know there was a key
under the herb box?

We shared a gardener.

Let's just say he wet more
than her plants.

Okay, I have to be
at that meditation class, too,

-so, we should go.
-Sam, this is for Steven.

What if she is lying?
Doesn't he deserve to know?

You check the mail. I'll take the bedroom.

[Alexis squeals]

What?

[Alexis] I knew it.

What's that?

A fake baby bump.

But this is way bigger than Melissa's.

She must have one for every stage.

I bet you Goldilocks is wearing one
right now.

[people chattering]

That name looks good in neon.

Congratulations, Monny.

Expanding the Colby empire.

I don't need an empire.

-I just need to throw a good party.
-[man] Ms. Colby. Quan is here.

Oh. Right on time.
I'm gonna make sure everything is ready.

-You coming?
-Yeah, I'll be there soon.

Gotta take care of something.

♪ Don't let that money fool ya, boy
Ain't sh*t changed ♪

♪ We in Miami on Biscayne ♪

♪ Forty-thousand for the big face ♪

♪ And they want another 50 thousand
Just to bust it down ♪

♪ I've been doing this sh*t
Since sixth grade ♪

♪ Teachers told me I would never make ♪

♪ No money off these words
Now I'm not worried 'bout nobody ♪

♪ Told that same teacher, "Look at me"
And I didn't go to college ♪

[woman] As we begin,
I want to thank you all

for bringing your divine energy
into this sacred space.

She's obviously never been here before.

-I don't know where Sam is.
-It's okay. Relax.

As we consider our intentions

for the time and space
we have made together,

we breath in the light

and exhale what is heavy.

[breathing deeply]

Oh, you really went all out.

Thought it'd be more down and dirty.

It's not Tokyo Drift.

I don't wanna damage the cars.
Though that loop-the-loop's pretty filthy.

[man 1] Rich people are so weird.

[man 2] You know these toy cars
cost way more than my real one?

Carrington saw them at a dealership,
and Colby bought one to screw with him.

-Like I said.
-[Jeff] Should we do this or what?

I'm all for reliving your childhood,
but I got a grown-up party to get to.

First one to the end of the track.
Winner takes all.

[man 1] I got 50 on Carrington. What the hell.

-I'll take that bet.
-Make it 100.

Let's go, let's go. Let's go, y'all.

[crowd cheering]

Let's go!

[chattering]

-[Culhane] Welcome home.
-Thank you.

Didn't realize
you were bringing a plus-one.

I had to come straight from the airport.

He offered me a ride.
It was only polite to invite him.

How's my lipstick?

-Perfect.
-I'm gonna go check.

[Culhane chuckles]

-I hear congratulations are in order.
-Indeed. Thanks.

Didn't know you were popping the question.

-It hasn't been that long, right?
-Four years.

I just hope this thing between Fal and I
didn't make you rush into anything.

How so?

Just that she might not be as excited
as you are.

[chuckles]

She's wearing my ring. I'm good, bro.

-What about me?
-I was just saying how gorgeous you look.

You always say that. Should we go in?

I think I'm actually gonna head out.

-Are you sure?
-Yeah, I'm sure. Have fun, guys. Three, two, one.

[crowd cheering]

Come on, Carrington. Let's go, baby.

[crowd cheering]

Let's go, let's go.

[all cheering]

-I got it. Yeah.
-Get off me. -[Blake] No!
-Whoo!

-Whoo!
-No!

Whoo!

[Blake groans]

A bet's a bet.

[Kirby] Fallon Carrington?
Fancy seeing you here.

You remember me, don't you?

-Your old mate?
-Kirby? What are you doing here?

Haven't you heard? I'm back.

Is that my dress?
I was supposed to wear that tonight.

Yeah. It looks good, doesn't it?

And my grandma's necklace.
Were you in my house?

-In my room?
-Just like old times.

-Give me my necklace back, psycho.
-When I'm done.

When you're done what?
Single White Female-ing me?

Let's just go upstairs.

Hey.

-[grunting]
-[Culhane] Hey, relax.

-That's right, bitch. Come at me.
-[Culhane] Security!

[woman] And now, as we fall
into the rhythm of our breaths,

we can become conscious of our partners

and bring our rhythms into sync.

Where have you been?

What are you doing here?

I am here to expose you.
The jig is up, you lying bitch.

[Culhane] Get her, please.

-Fallon!
-[yells]

Oh.

-That's--
-My stomach?

-You know what? Keep it.
-You think it's your clothes I want?

Maybe when I was 12.

-What the hell do you want?
-I want everything.

Everything you took from me
when you had me shipped back to Australia.

I'm gonna take your friends, your family,
your whole damn world.

[Steven] Is this a joke?

-It's not my fault.
-[Alexis] I don't understand.

We both saw the fake baby bump
in your closet.

-You broke into her house?
-[Melissa] I have an event in two months.

I needed to be fitted for my dress
ahead of time.

-I was approximating how big I'll be.
-And the deli meats, the cheeses?

I'm having a dinner party.
People need to eat.

It's called being a gracious hostess.

As much as I'd love to stay here and chat
with you about being a lawbreaking psycho,

your son's baby is pushing
on my bladder right now,

so, I'd like to go home.

-What the hell is wrong with you?
-It was an innocent misunderstanding.

We should talk about this later,
when you're not so upset.

This was all her.

She manipulated me
and made me think Melissa was a liar.

Don't try to blame this on Alexis.
You're a grown man, supposedly.

You chose to believe your crazy
mother-in-law instead of your husband.

She basically att*cked me. Ask anyone.
Or are you gonna frame me for this, too?

I can't believe you'd do this
on opening night.

You know better than anyone
what bad publicity can do.

Monica, you need to fire
this crazy bitch now.

-Excuse me?
-Get rid of this lunatic

before she burns the place down.

You cause a scene, and you wanna tell me
how to staff my club?

I mean, I am the one that paid for it
in the first place.

And you'll never let me forget it.

To solve that problem, here's a check...

for 3.5 million.

That's everything you paid plus interest.

And as far as who I fire, that's my call,
'cause this is my club.

And Kirby doesn't even work here.

Let's get out of here.

Can't say I didn't warn you.
That's one down.

Monica. What is going on?

My friends keep texting me
that people are fighting.

I took care of it while you were out
playing kids' games with Blake Carrington.

Who I thought we were moving on from.

Maybe you should deal with
whatever identity crisis you have going on

and leave me alone, okay?

I took the liberty
of calling the private nurse, sir.

I don't need a nurse.

I bruised my hand racing toy cars.
I know--

[gasps]

It may be broken.

Fortunately, the nurse that I called
is waiting for you in your office.

I assume, from the injury, that the race
didn't work out how you expected?

It did not.

-I lost.
-Well, I'm relieved to hear it.

Excuse me?

Well, if you'll excuse the metaphor,
you're behaving like a child.

Throwing tantrums,
spinning out of control,

all over some toys.

I bought those toy cars for you.

-For me?
-Yeah.

They reminded me of the days we spent
together racing them when I was a kid.

You were always around
when my father was who-knows-where.

I was gonna give you the set.

Well, I'm touched, sir.

Well, they're gone now. So, get over it.

Blake, are you okay?
I heard you were injured.

Ooh. We should get some ice on that.
Or is it heat?

Anyway, come upstairs.

Despite your lengthy stay in hospital,
we have a real nurse in there.

Good evening.

[door closes]

There's been a misunderstanding.
I'm not a nurse.

I tried to explain at the front gate,
but he assumed I was and let me in.

And I needed to talk to you.

-Well, who are you?
-My name is Cristal Jennings.

I was a friend of your late wife,
Cristal Flores.

You're the woman on the phone.

Oh, God.

[Blake] However you got in here,
you can go.

Tell me how much you want.
I'll write a check.

No, no, no. I don't want anything.

[sighs]

Here.

Look.

I think she wanted me to come here
and help you.

♪ I know that you love me ♪

I think you can help me, too.

♪ Though I'm young and stupid ♪

-[Jeff] You sure you're okay?
-Me? I'm great.

I got to show everyone
that Fallon is kind of unhinged,

and she ripped my dress,

which was actually hers,
so, seems like a win-win.

I'm learning that at some point
you gotta leave grudges in the past.

Otherwise, you start pissing off
new people.

[doorbell rings]

Like Monica.

Who's probably here
to chew me out some more.

Or fire me from a job I never even had.

[door opens]

-Kirby Anders?
-That's me.

How can I help you?

You're under arrest
for as*ault on Fallon Carrington.

♪ I'm just doing what I can ♪

You're pretty good at this.

What other hidden talents do you have
that I don't know about?

You'll have to wait
and discover them along the way.

Now, if we can just get this deal done,
Liam gone...

-I thought you trusted me.
-I do.

Okay, then don't worry, babe.
I can take care of myself.

Although I like it
when you take care of me.

-[cell phone ringing]
-Ooh.

This may be the call
we've been waiting for.

Hello?

Is this Fallon? I'm sorry.
I didn't know what to do.

Slow down. What's going on?

That guy,
he was blindfolded and handcuffed,

-and he wanted me to gag him.
-And then what?

He started freaking out,
so, I took out the gag.

He was turning red. He couldn't breathe.
He said he was having a heart att*ck.

-Well, did you call 911?
-No.

It was all so fast,
and then it was too late.