02x03 - The Butler Did It

[bunniefuu]

Previously onDynasty...I'd like to speak

to Mr. Blake Carrington.
My name is Cristal Jennings.

I was a friend of your
late wife, Cristal Flores.

I think she wanted me
to come here and help you.

Well, you remember
me, don't you?

Kirby?
[shrieks]

To the marriage of the Van Kirks
and the Carringtons.

If you really want
to thank me,

come to my penthouse
tomorrow night.

How did you get into the...Escort business?

I have a date tonight and I
need somebody who can fill in.

LEAH: Something bad happened
and I didn't know what to do.

He started freaking out
and he couldn't breathe.

He said he was having
a heart att*ck. He's dead.

JENNINGS: So she went from head
of PR to COO in four years.

BLAKE:
I know how to pick them.

Well, I'm not surprised.

I mean, Celia was everyone's
favorite back at the hospital.

Hospital?

She volunteered at a
hospital in Mexico.

That's how we met.

I was a patient, and
when she told me

what she had been
through in Venezuela

and how her dream was
to come to America,

I gave her my identity
to start a new life

since I thought
mine was over.

You really didn't
know any of this?

♪ Forever was haunted by...

Okay. Relax for a second.

Don't move.

Face down.Uh, what are you doing?

[neck cracks][grunts]

There you go.
I'm a healer.

That was our deal.

Trust me, your hand
will heal faster.

You have a lot of
tension in your back.

It's from an entire family
riding on my coattails.

[chuckles]
Yeah, I'm fine.

You know, what really
hurts is learning

that I did a miserable job
getting to know my wife.

What do you want
to know about her?

Ask me anything.

Would you go
to dinner with me?

So you can tell me
more about her.

Okay. Someplace where it's
acceptable to wear jeans

because that's
all I brought.

I have an idea.

I'll be wheels up by noon.

Hey. So, good news.

Max's head attorney, Vance,
has the ex*cuted contract

we need to complete
the sale of C.A.

Bad news: he wants me
to fly to New York to get it.

Can't you just ask him
to FedEx it to you?

So, worse news:
Max propositioned me,

so I sort of had an escort

pretend to be me and sleep
with him to get the contract,

but then he d*ed.

I'm sorry, you did what?

Look, it was an accident.

I'm just scared that
Vance might know something

and try to blackmail me.

And while you're
giving me that look,

which guts me, just know
that I know it was wrong,

morally and professionally,
maybe even spiritually.

Please say something.

Just seems like every time we
get close to starting over,

the world just keeps
trying to screw us.

Are you sure you still want
to be engaged to this?

Can you believe it?

So your plan is to fly to
New York to get the contract.

Yes, and to handle
the escort.

Let's just pray she likes
leather suitcases

stuffed with cash.[knock at door]

Miss Carrington?

Liam Ridley is waiting
downstairs for you.

They found him naked
in his penthouse.

They said he d*ed
of a heart att*ck.

Nobody saw it coming.

Well, I'm so shocked

and sorry.
I mean, I know

how much Max meant to you.

[sighs] Yeah,
well, there's more.

All of our family in New York,
they'll be throwing a memorial.

Oh, well, we can go to New York.I can't.

See, my mom wasn't close
with her brother,

but she knew I was, so
she's flying over from Capri

to see how I'm doing...
and to meet my wife.

What?I'm sorry,

but she's gonna be the one
taking over the company now,

which means she's gonna have
to sign off on the sale.Of course she is.

Unless Uncle Max signed
the contract before he d*ed,

but I don't think he did.

I called his lawyers
this morning

and they couldn't find
the ex*cuted copy.

[scoffs] Listen,
I'll leave you two alone,

but can I talk to you first,
please, Fallon?

[whispering]: Oh, I
don't know what to do.

I do.

You're staying here
and I'm going to New York.

We're gonna do
whatever it takes

to get you the hell away
from these people.

Then it's just us.

So, are you here to apologize
or just violate my Dolce?

No, I came because I wanted
to put our differences aside

for Steven's sake.

Oh, and the baby's, who is
innocent in all of this.

Well, every despicable human
was once an innocent baby.

Would you let us

host a baby shower?

It would mean the world
to Steven.

Was that an apology?

An invitation. Don't push it.

Okay. I am sorry
for doubting your pregnancy

and for exposing your naked body
to all those strangers.

Now...

can we host the shower?

Well, that depends.

What do you want everyone
to call you from now on?

Nana Alexis

or Mimaw

or something more classic
like Granny?

Listen, you low-level
vaginal climber,

we can have a judge
take that kid from you

faster than you removed
your diaphragm.

Don't be jealous, Alexis.

It's an even worse look
than that suit.

[laughing]:
"Jealous"?Well, you will be

once your grandchild is the heir
to the Carrington fortune

and won't have
to settle like you did

for whatever scraps a two-bit
divorce lawyer can get.

But yes, you can
host the shower.

Steven texted me earlier.

Of course he did.

Where is she?Calm down, Kirby.

Fallon!

Come out, come out
wherever you're coiled up.

What is happening?

Oh. Glad to see you

looking so well,
Mrs. Carrington,

after all you've been through.

Kirby.

You don't seem
very happy to see me.

Such a surprise.

I would've expected
more tattoos,

perhaps the names of other
families you've tormented.

Just yours, Alexis.

Right across my ass.

What's she doing here?

I'm looking for your spawn who
pressed charges against me

so now I have
to go to a week

of court-ordered anger
management therapy

just because I wanted to have
a few words with her.

I believe those words were

as*ault and battery.

And I believe Fallon paid
off a judge to say that.

I want her out.
Let's just
give her a chance.

The situation
is only worsening.

She set fire
to Fallon's room.

I told you a million times,
you cow, I didn't do it!

Sorry to interrupt, but
U.S. Customs is calling

about a $400,000 shipment.

A bit busy, Gunnerson.

KIRBY:
I'm fine, Dad.

You can go.

I promise.ALEXIS: Not far,

in case she decides
to manhandle me again.

Do you understand what it does
to a little girl

to be ripped from a parent,

to be shipped halfway
around the world for no reason?

No reason?

[chuckles]
Are you off your meds?

We both know I didn't
start that fire.

You were always a dramatic brat.

I was a kid and you
thought you got rid of me.

You told everyone
I was the problem child.

Well, I'm back, bitch.

And I'm your problem now.

♪

Careful. Gently. They've had
a long flight in from Japan

and any additional stress
can affect their tenderness.

I've heard that music's quite
good for treating stress.

Should I sing to them?

These are no ordinary
baby back ribs, Anders.

These are Kurobuta.

They're from pigs
that have not only

been fed Japanese beer,

but they've had Japanese beer
massaged into them.

I want their life.

Except for the
slaughtered part.

I'm concerned that your
baby-tacular shower

seems to be overover the top,
even by Carrington standards.

Don't be.

I need to make this an event
Steven cherishes forever.

And wait till you see the baby
giraffes and baby elephants.

Totes adorbs.

Baby animals are...
totes adorbs,

but their fecal
business, not so much.

Not in this house.
You can have your ribs,

but that's it.

LAURA: Miguel, you know that
I like my black-eyed Susans

to have more space.

These are strangling
each other

and they cannot breathe.LIAM: Hi, Mom.

I do not love this
haircut on you.

You must be Fallon.

My God. You are stunning.

You're too kind.
[chuckles]

I'm so thrilled
to finally meet you.

And George and I, we would have
rushed right down here

to Atlanta for your wedding,

but Jack or Liam,

whatever it is

he's going by these days,
he neglected to even have one

or even tell us about you
until afterwards.

[gasps] Ooh.

We can get to know
each other now.

And I'm truly sorry
for the loss of your brother.

It's so tragic.

Yes, the tragedy
of Max's passing.

It's that I could not be there
to be with him on his deathbed

to give him the finger
one last time.

Why am I always late
to the party?

Hey.

How are you?
All right.

Fallon, this is my
stepfather George.
Hi.

Wouldn't you have made
the most gorgeous bride ever?Oh.

Mm-hmm.Would you be on my team?

I hope you like to swing.

[laughter]

Oh, my God, this is like
a Barneys catalog in 3-D.

You like the Dior. Excellent.

They're all stunning, Blake.

But I think I'd feel
a little weird

trying on my friend's clothes.

My dead friend's clothes.

Cristal would want you to.

The Carrington style team

will make sure that everything
fits you perfectly.

["Just Can't Get Enough"
by Depeche Mode playing]

♪ When I'm with you, baby

♪ I go out of my head

♪ And I just can't get enough

♪ I just can't get enough

♪ All the things you do to me,
and everything you said ♪

♪ I just can't get enough...

Liam.

Maybe guard the alley for once.
Or do you want her

to get it past you
for the seventh time? Huh?

Sorry, but tennis is a
blood sport around here.

People have been ex*cuted
for missing a backhand.

♪

[shouts]

Liam. Are you okay?

Oh, he blocked my sh*t.

And that would've been a winner.

You always do exactly
the wrong thing, Liam.

Always.

We're gonna play
that point over.

Are you okay?

Yeah.
LAURA:
Unbelievable.

♪ It's getting hotter...

KIRBY:
How many of these ridiculous,
court-appointed sessions

do I have to sit through,
Dr. Toscanni?

It would help me get to the
root of your anger issues

with the Carringtons if I
knew your history with them.

Tell me some of your earlier
memories before you left.

You mean before I was banished?

They blamed me for setting fire
to Fallon's room

and they kicked me
out of the house.That sounds painful.

I spent a lifetime trying to
forget the rest of my memories.

That makes me smart, not crazy.

Look, there's something
I don't typically do

with my clients.

Don't even think
about it.

Hypnosis.Oh.

Would you be open
to me unblocking

some of those memories?

Only weak minds
can be hypnotized.

I may be a lot of things, but
weak-minded is not one of them.

I have to agree,

but focus on my fist
like it's a magnet,

pulling those memories
out of your mind.

Just focus
on the magnet.

And tell me,
what do you remember

before the Carringtons accused
you of starting that fire?

I am seeing something.

A man.

A man who...

thinks his fist
is a bloody magnet,

and I'm the one
who needs therapy.

[scoffs]

Ugh, I'm...

so spent. [laughs]

LIAM: You k*lled it
out there, George.

I'm impressed with Fallon.

Your competitive spirit

is almost as intense as mine.

Oh, no. You wiped
the court with us.

And I had to carry Liam's ass,
as usual.

[sighs]
[phone vibrating]

Who's that?

Oh, just a business call.

Well, this has been a blast,
but I have to run.

I'll see you tomorrow?

Oh...Well, this is
disappointing.

We were just getting
to know you,

and now, I want
to know everything.

I want that, too, obviously,

but we'll have
several days to connect

before you and George
leave Atlanta.

GEORGE:
Atlanta rocks.

We need to come more often.

Miguel, I love the flowers.

This is so strange, Fallon.

Liam is staying here,
so why would you want to leave

instead of being here
to sleep with your husband?

[slurping]

Her first session was
more unpleasant for me

than it was for her.

Kirby is a
hardheaded woman.

Hardheaded little bitch
is more like it.

So what'd she tell you?

All I got is she remembers
being blamed for the fire.

Damn it, Nick, I didn't
bribe you onto the case

to hear what I already know.

I need you to find out
exactly what Kirby remembers.

She's a woman now.

It's gonna be a hell of a lot
harder to take her ass down.

I can't wait till Alexis
finds out she's no longer

the most conniving mother
in Atlanta.

I should set up a cage match.

The bed's all yours.
I'll take the couch.

That's sweet,

but that would still
be disrespectful to my fiancé,

so I'll just slip
into another bedroom

once Mommie Dearest
goes to sleep.

LAURA:
Knock, knock.

FALLON: Oh, I guess
I've been doing it wrong,

knocking before I enter.

Yes, you think I would've
learned by now

after walking in on Liam
doing so many... lonely things.

I wanted you
to have something

noticeable to sleep in.

How very considerate.
Oh, that's the front. Okay.

[chuckles]
Mm-hmm.

[door squeaks closed][chuckles]

Once she takes
her sleepy pills,

you'll be able
to sneak out...[door opens]

Oh, and I almost
forgot to say,

please, to keep your
nighttime activities quiet.

My bedroom's right
across the hall,

and, well, I can
hear everything.

[door squeaks closed]

Thank you for coming,
Mr. Culhane.

Ada Stone.

I'm sorry, there must
be a mistake.

I'm meeting Vance.

You like
my new baby?

A 2,000-year-old
black granite sarcophagus

discovered 16 feet
underground in Alexandria,

fully sealed.
He's still in there.

How such a
significant object

managed to slip out of Egypt
and into my possession

is an excellent
question,

but one thing I've learned
in business is:

it's best not to ask questions.

I've recently acquired
another valuable possession.

The ex*cuted sale
of Carrington Atlantic.

The only copy
Max Van Kirk signed

before his untimely death.

You look like a serious man,
so I'll cut to the chase.

You give me a million dollars
and I'll give you the contract.

Where's Vance?
And how'd you acquire this?

Two questions. Ballsy.

You know Vance is Max Van Kirk's
attorney-- was his attorney--

but he also does
consulting work for me.

I have high-level consultants
in many places, Mr. Culhane,

and I suggest those
be your last questions.

Now, do we
have a deal?

I have no interest in doing
business with you, Miss Stone.

Thank you.

Take care, homie.

Thanks for
letting me crash.

You're the only
person in my life

who hasn't tried
to kick me out... yet.

You know what? You are crazy.

What?

You escaped
the Carrington psycho ward

and now you're trying
to bust back in?

That's certifiable.
Personally,

I'm happy you're back,

but if they're
not treating you right,

if not even your own dad
is standing up for you,

then what are
you doing here?

Kirby? What are you doing here?

JEFF:
Kirby?

Hey.

Are you okay?

What if I did set fire
to Fallon's room, Jeff?

I worry about
that sometimes.

Did I block it out?

What if I'm the monster
they say that I am?

Don't go there, okay?

That's exactly what
they want you to think.

Lucky for you, you are
in excellent company

of people the Carringtons
have screwed over.

JENNINGS:
I'll admit, when you said

you were taking me out
for Japanese food,

I thought you meant
in Atlanta.

Well, why stay
at home?

The best Japanese
restaurant in the country

is just a jaunt
away in Miami.

[chuckles] Well, this is by far
the nicest living room

that I've ever been in
that's moving 600 miles an hour.

Ah.

Marlow, you read my mind.
What do you have for us tonight?

In addition
to our full bar,

Mr. Carrington,
we have

the Nocturno-- features
a house-made squid ink syrup;

and our classic
cabin special,

the Maine Lobstertini.

Oh, well, they all
sound delicious.

I think I'll go
with the Nocturno.

You should try the Lobstertini.

It sounds great, too, but
I really want to try squid ink.

I think you'd like
the Lobstertini.

Maybe on the way back.

Cristal loved
the Lobstertini.

Okay.

I'll have the
Lobstertini,

and the Nocturno.

[chuckling]It's a two-hour flight.

Thank you.

Why are we getting
another piano?

This is a Fazioli Brunei.
Handmade in Italy.

It's a baby grand
for a baby shower

for my baby daddy.

Sam, we already have
a baby grand.

Not in the nursery.

[scoffs]
I think we have a problem.

Don't tell me
you ordered one, too.

You are the problem, Sam.

What are you talking about?

I know I screwed up,
and now I'm k*lling myself

to make you a baby shower
that'll be the envy

of all future baby showers.

Exactly. You're overcompensating
on a party

instead of just connecting
with me emotionally

about having a baby.

I wanted to experience
this journey together,

but this just makes me
want to be alone.

Classic Steven.Classic what now?

You're running away
from reality, your go-to.

Okay, reality police,
illuminate me.

My pleasure. You're projecting
your baby issues onto me

and avoiding the real truth that
you're not ready to be a father.

What? That's outrageous...

Just admit it, you don't
want this baby either.

No-- [sighs]

[sighs]

[line ringing]MICHAEL: Hey.

Please tell me you got
the contract from Vance

so I can be done
with the Van Cuckoos.I wish.

His people are not who we want
to be doing business with.

Crap.Trust me, Fallon.

I got a bad vibe.Of course I trust you,

but don't worry, I'm winning
Liam's mom over somehow,

so the sale will go through
even without the contract.

And then we can ditch Atlanta
and start "Falhane" together.

You don't know
how badly I want that.

Listen, just pay off the escort
to keep her quiet,

and then get
your k*ller ass home.

[whispering]:
I can't wait to see you, love.

No knock this time?

I thought I left the light on.

Can't wait to see who, love?

Oh, my brother.

I can't wait to see him
at his baby shower tomorrow.

Oh, you and George,
you must come.

George would love Steven.
They have so much in common.

I didn't want the,

uh, the phone call to wake Liam.

He's such a light sleeper.

So can I help you
find your room?

Oh...It's a big house,

wouldn't want you
to lose your way.

Okay.

I know this is all
very overwhelming,

but I really appreciate
what you're doing for me.

Is there anything I can do

to make you feel
more comfortable?

There's one thing.
Name it.

I got to take these shoes off.

I know they cost a fortune,
but they're k*lling my feet.

Shall I?
Please. Yes.

[clears throat]

Thank you.

Oh, and the earrings, too heavy.

Don't do that.Do what?

Would you put
them back on?
Why?

You said I should
be comfortable.

Just put the damn
earrings back on.

Cristal would never
have done that.

[scoffs, mutters in Spanish]

I want to go back to Atlanta.

You can't just...

This was a mistake.

You said you wanted to know
more about Celia,

but all you want is a date
with your dead wife.

Turn the plane around.

Please.

ANDERS: There will be
one baby giraffe outside.

That's a compromise, so smile.Steven was right.

This is way too much,

and we're not even close
to making up.

Surely you didn't think

that this was going to make
Steven forgive you.

It would've worked for me,

and I'm the one making
the sacrifice here.

I know what it's like to raise
a child that isn't yours,

but this isn't about me
and it's not about you.

It's about Steven.

This was a gift

from Steven's baby shower.
The theme was "Golden Spoon."

Damn it, I should've
thought of that.

He got lots of extravagant gifts
and one very simple one,

from me-- ended up
being his favorite.

[chuckles] Steven was
never into excess.

He just wanted people
to be there for him.

That's still the same today.

He's terrified
of fatherhood, Sam.

He assumes you'll
be there for the baby,

but what he needs is for you
to be there for him.

A pillow wall?

I-I could just sleep
on the couch.

Your mom is already suspicious.

Who's to say
she's not gonna drop by

in the middle of the night?

Besides, my mom used to build
a wall on Steven's bed

every time he brought a girl
home, and it always worked.

I wonder why.

I used to do this
to my sister's bed

whenever my high school
friends would visit.

They only really ever
wanted to be around her.

Or on her.

Well, better a sister
than a mom.

High school pool
parties at the manor,

all the boys would come to my
yard for Alexis's milkshakes.

You want to make this
an emotional scar-off?

'Cause I'll win.

Bring it.

My mom forgot me in Aspen.

Left me alone
on a mountain for 12 hours.

I was eight.

My dad sent his assistant
to my middle school musical.

I was the lead, and it wasn't
even his first assistant,

it was a temp.

2005 hunting season.
Dad sh*t Layla, my Dachshund,

'cause he thought she was a fox.

Damn. You win.

Did you ever forgive him?

Uh, he wasn't
his best at the time.

He d*ed a few months later.

Well, I'm sorry
to hear that.

Right after that,
my mom had a mental breakdown.

I've been... scared
to hurt her ever since.

Which is why I just sit there
and say nothing

rather than telling her
to shove it.

It's just... easier.

Well, sometimes it's good
to stand up for yourself.

Yeah? How's that working out
with you and Blake?

Ha. You're like the Steven
of the Van Kirks.

Both of you turned
your backs on the business,

walked away from the family...

Both of us protected
by pillow walls.

Then why aren't you
walking away now?

I don't want
to mess up your deal.

Lies.

I don't know.

[laughs softly]

For some crazy reason,
I still want her approval.

It's pretty stupid, right?

It's not stupid at all.

Night.

Night.

I'm pleasantly surprised you're
open to trying this again.

As long as you don't try that
amateur magnetic hand crap.

Let's just give it a sh*t.

Close your eyes.

Begin to let go.

[clock ticking]

Just relax.

So much so that
you won't mind

[echoing]: going to
sleep for a little bit.

[crying]: Don't let them
take me away! Don't!

[gasps softly]

No. I don't want
to do this anymore.

It was working.Let's go back to the hand.

We can't stop now, Kirby.

All right? Facing it
is the best way

to get the answers
we're looking for.

Okay?

[echoing]: You're going to find
it hard to keep your eyes open.

[echoing]:
Blake called his divorce lawyer.

ANDERS: Oh, it's just
a bump in the road.

You'll-you'll get past it.
You always do.

Yes, he said he'd destroy me,
and I would get nothing.

And if he ever
found out about us, I...

So that's what
you're worried about?

That was years ago, Alexis.

A night I will regret
for the rest of my life.

FALLON:
Have you seen Kirby?

That little bitch let Mr. Hoppy
out of his cage again.

I can't find him.Well, Fallon, I'm sorry.

I'll help you find him.

[clattering nearby]

Kirby?

What are you doing?

You shouldn't be here.
You shouldn't have done this.

[echoes]:
You shouldn't have done this.

What did you see?

I got to go.

You're not allowed
to leave, Kirby.

This is court-ordered
therapy.

Good morning, everyone.

These hydrangeas
look wilty.

I should probably get
a hold of Miguel.

Aren't you going to ask
your wife what she wants?

Forgive my son, Fallon.

Fallon, can I please see
your plate?

You're sweet.

But I am an independent woman,

fully capable
of serving myself salmon.

Well, of course you're
an independent woman.

God knows, you wouldn't want to
have to rely on my eunuch son.

Which is why after being married
to you for an hour, Liam,

she already has
someone on the side.

Y-You, you have no idea
what you're talking about...

Don't think that I didn't notice
all those calls to "Michael"?

But there's nothing
to be ashamed of.

My son, on the other hand...
[scoffs]

Weakness, that is
an inexcusable trait.

Sadly, you have married
the king of it.

Okay.

Listen up,
you Joan Crawford psycho shrew.

Your son doesn't
fight back

not because he's weak, but
because he's protective of you,

or are you too much
of a self-absorbed witch

to even notice?

Ever since I met him,
he's asked nothing of me

and he's given
me everything.

I mean, anyone could
see his strength.

But you have to look close
to see his soul.

So, open your eyes,
if you still can,

because you have no clue
what you're missing.

KIRBY: You had an
affair with Alexis?

Are you out of your mind?

Don't. Don't deny it.

[sighs] Alexis is right.
You need to leave.

I remember now.

I watched you and Alexis have
a fight because she was afraid

that Blake would find out
you two had an affair.

She saw me hiding and then,
a few days later,

Fallon's bedroom
mysteriously caught on fire,

and guess who got blamed?

I always thought spoiled brat
Fallon did it because

she wanted me gone,

but it wasn't her,
it was Alexis.

She needed to get rid of me
in case I let something slip.

I was 12 years old, Dad.

I had no idea what that
conversation meant,

but I still paid the price
when it was all your fault.

Kirby, please, you have no idea
what you're talking about.

Stop it. Stop protecting them
and taking their side

over and over again.

Your affair is the reason
I was sent away.

You are the reason I grew up
without a father.

I was never crazy, but this
family told everyone that I was,

and you chose to believe them.

All is good with the escort.
Falhane for the win.

We'll celebrate with a case
of champagne when I get back.

I hate to be the one to burst
our bubbly, but I screwed up.

Big-time.

I sort of told Liam's mom
to shove it.

What? Why-why did you do that?

She was being rude to...
the staff.

Look, I'll win her back, it's
just gonna take a little longer.

And you'll still
be married to Liam.

I am sorry, Michael,
but what do you want me to do?

This is the last chance

we have to get
the contract back.

ADA:
Well, well, well.

Knew you'd be back, Michael.

People don't
usually turn me down.

I can wire you the money
in an hour.

Mm. I want to show you
something first.

Nice escort.
k*ller cheekbones.

Not a great negotiator.

I gave her double
what you offered.

She should have held out for
more, but I do have her story.

I think your Carrington
friend's in deep trouble.

How much more do you want?

I wonder if Fallon's career
would be over

if she went to prison for fraud?

Manslaughter? Ooh.

[laughs]

That sounds bad.

But maybe it would be
good for her.

Cervantes went to prison
right before

Don Quixotewas published,

and it was only a hit
because of it.

Take your contract.

I don't want your money.

What do you want?

You're gonna be
my new consultant.

It just so happens,
I need someone in Atlanta.

Say no, and I go public
with the photos.

And the escort's testimony.

The one she and I agreed on,

with a few embellishments,
of course.

See,

I don't just bargain
for antiques, sweetheart.

I bargain for power.

♪

♪ My baby don't care
for shows... ♪

[whining]

Thank you.

Well,
you look positively...

matronly.

[laughs]

And how is that
little lottery ticket of yours?

Feeling quite at home.

And you must promise
to come and visit us.

Alexis. A word?

Oh, excuse me.

♪ My baby don't care for...

It's ridiculous, right?

Sam went tragically
overboard.

It's nice.

Thank you for lying.

I'm glad you're
here, though.

Despite your whole
Blake being Blake thing.

Actually, it's "Blake-Time."

Oh, I know.

And I'm thankful for it.

Made me realize
that I owe you an apology.

I've been
critical of you,

as a father, as a Republican,
as a g*n nut...

This is a terrible apology.

But you were the one who stayed.

You were the one
who accepted me,

and always welcomed me back
every time I left,

no questions asked.

No, there were some questions.Dad.

What if I can't be that?

What if I am a terrible father,

and end up running away
just like I always do?

After we lost Adam, I was
scared to have another child.

I didn't know
if I could ever love again.

It wasn't until the day

that you were born
that I realized how wrong I was.

These things just come.

You can't force it.

Sam is trying to show you
how on board he is with it;

he's not even the father.

That's something,
isn't it?

As for you,

you will feel it when
your baby's born, son,

trust me.

Am I interrupting?

We're literally
in the middle of a hug.

Listen, I know
it's another gift,

and you're into this socialist
no-luxury agenda thing, but...

Sam.

I should have appreciated
everything you've been doing.

It's not what I would've done.
I mean, not even close.

You were right.
I am scared.

But I still want to go
on this journey with you.

Thank you?

It was yours.

It's humble and solid.

It gave you support and comfort
when you needed it.

And that's my job now.

So why don't we
rock this horse together.

[chuckles]:
No, that was weird. I meant...

If you knew how to handle
that hellion,

we wouldn't have
this issue, would we?

I refuse to have this discussion
right now, Anders.

I have Melissa's thunder
to steal.

You were the one responsible
for sending Kirby away.

This is absurd.

It makes perfect sense.

You wanted her gone, so you did
the most despicable...

I did what I had to do.

She was 12. She didn't have
a clue what was going on!

She could have
exposed us then.

And who knows?
She could expose us now.

We slept together
once, Alexis.

And to think that that's why
you sent Kirby away,

when you didn't even
know what she heard.

You set fire to
Fallon's bedroom,

you destroyed my daughter's
life, and for what?

To protect your reputation?

Unless there was something else.

I once asked you about this
and you said no.

Alexis?

Joseph, please.

Am I the father?

Yes.

Congratulations.

Don't let them
take me away, please!

I didn't do it, I promise.

Don't let them take me away!

Please!

Fallon?

♪ My mind is crazy

♪ Whenever you come around

♪ My view is hazy...

Too subtle?

I think I got it.Scale of one to ten,

how much does your mom hate me?

Well, do you know
how much she hates me?

Mm-hmm.It's times that
by a thousand.

[sighs]
God. I buried myself.

You said some surprising things
about me.

It's almost as if
you were saying...

It was a tense situation.
I didn't know what I was saying.

Say it now, Fallon.

Do you have feelings for me?

Hey, hey, hey.

Hey.

Special delivery.

Is this the contract?

I hate to see any
marriage fall apart;

I'm afraid yours is over.

Didn't know you guys
had a plan B.

Actually, we had a plan A.

I hope you get
what you truly want.

You okay?

Yeah. Yeah.

Um, what happened
to Vance's creepy people?

They were all bark
and no bite.

Now you don't need
anybody else.

I never did.

♪ To slow down...

[phone ringing]

Uh, give me two seconds

to find us some baby
champagne to celebrate.

Now is not a good time to talk.

Oh, I get it.
You're in a tough spot.

What would Fallon think
if she found out

you put her existence
in grave jeopardy?

Oh, well. Not my problem.

Now, ready to talk?

All right, I'm listening.

Liam.

I-I was thinking you could stay
on for the transition team.

You know, as a way to
earn your mom's approval?

I'll see you
at the office... boss.

[sighs]

♪

Fallon. I'm so happy
you're here.

How's therapy
treating you, babe?

Seventh time's the charm?

Oh, come on. That's no way
to talk to your sister.

Crazy, right? Sister?

Isn't that a slap in the face?

Another one.

♪ When we meet inside the fire

♪ Oh, we'll just
watch it burn... ♪

Okay,

I'm wigging out here.

Kirby just got up in my face
and called me her sister.

I mean, what is that?

So a crazy person
said something

crazy to you, and you're
accepting it as gospel.

♪ Do you think I'm drop dead?

[laughs softly]

Thank you guys for coming.

♪ g*n to the head...

STEVEN: I can't believe
I'm saying this,

but I love our weird family.

♪ g*n to the head...

Come here, crazy.

♪ Do you think I'm drop dead?

♪ Uh, oh, oh, oh,
g*n to the head... ♪

JENNINGS:
Sam.

I came back to say good-bye.

What?

♪ The way I'm praying over you

♪ Don't blame me now...

♪ Don't, don't blame me now...

Cristal?

We're in the middle
of a hug here.

[Jennings laughs softly]

[speaks Spanish]

♪ Uh, oh, oh, oh

♪ g*n to the head...

Hi. I didn't think I'd see you
again, but I'm glad you're here.

I wanted to return these.

Oh...

It didn't feel right
keeping them.

Hope you find peace, Blake.

I thought I could give you
closure, but I made it worse.

Are you kidding me? Idid.

My behavior
was unacceptable.

You showed up, this ray of light
after all the darkness.

I don't deserve a second chance,
but I don't want to lose you.

Would you please stay?

I don't think that would be
a good idea, for either of us.

[exhales]

[glass clinking]

I want to thank you all
for coming to this event,

which has so much meaning to me

because it's a celebration
of family,

and a new arrival in our family,
and I couldn't be happier,

boy or girl.

I would especially like
to thank Sam, my love,

for making this
spectacular event happen.

Well, thank Melissa.

She really
made it happen.

[laughter]

Now let's do this
gender reveal.

It's, uh, pink
for boy, right?

WOMAN [over video]:
Is it a boy?

MAN:
Is it a girl?

WOMAN [distorts]:
Is it a boy...

ALEXIS [over video]: If you knew
how to handle that hellion,

we wouldn't have this issue,
would we?

I refuse to discuss
this now, Anders.

I have Melissa's thunder
to steal.

ANDERS:
You are the one responsible

for sending Kirby away.

ALEXIS:
This is absurd.

ANDERS:
It makes perfect sense.

You wanted her gone,

so you did the most
despicable...

ALEXIS:
I did what I had to do.

ANDERS:
She was 12.

She didn't have a clue
what was going on!

ALEXIS:
She could have exposed us then.
And who knows...

[people gasping]

Uh, I am so sorry
about the confusion.

Video wires must have
gotten crossed.

Well, the security
camera footage

is just a menial
household matter.

Let's get back to what's
really important, and that is

revealing the sex
of my grandchild.

You all need to know
the whole story!

The truth.ANDERS:
This is neither

the time nor the place.

When is the time or the place
to tell everyone

that you and Alexis
had an affair?

[people gasping]An affair and a child?

What?Fallon.

That's... no.

You have been a troubled child

since you stepped foot
in this manor.

Liar.
You're a filthy liar, Alexis,

and everyone here knows it.

I am a liar?

I am sorry, but...

well, I think you
all should know

that the court
ordered Kirby

to see a therapist,
and he diagnosed her

as a sociopath.

That's not true.He was required

to report it to me

because she is a thr*at
to my daughter.

I am not.

Kirby, we have tried
to be discreet about this,

but I am going
to make sure

that you get the best care
in a secured facility.

No. I heard it.

She had an affair
with my father.

And a child, Fallon.

You have to believe me...ANDERS:
Enough.

Kirby is telling the truth.

[people gasping]

Anders, don't.

She's right
about the affair.

But Fallon
isn't my child.

[exhales]
Oh, thank God.

Steven is.

Okay, wait, so,

my son wouldn't be
a Carrington heir?

I can't
do this anymore.

I mean, I can just see
the headlines now:

"The butler did it."

You're not
the father, Steven.

My gyno is.

[crying]:
What?