03x11 - Lady Liberty

Complete Collection of episode transcripts. Aired: July 1, 2008 to June 3, 2013.*
Watch/Buy Amazon  Merchandise


Amy Juergens finds out she's pregnant after a fling at band camp, her whole world changes as she deals with family, friends, school and life.
Post Reply

03x11 - Lady Liberty

Post by bunniefuu »

So, everyone's going to the park to
celebrate the last day of school!

I don't feel like celebrating.
I still haven't heard from Amy.

I think I maybe wanna stay a day or
two extra at the end of the program.

Maybe you could think about me flying
to New York at the end of the program

just like all
the other dads are doing.

Amy, is that really you?
I'm just calling to let you know

that I will talk to you at some
point but not over the phone.

I don't know if I can not
call you for two more weeks.

I wanna do something with you
that you haven't done with her.

Something else like what?
Spend the night at Grace's guest house.

I wanna be a doctor.
I wanna be a doctor.

No way.

The only girl
I'm interested in is Amy.

Well, I've got news for you.

Ricky's flying to New York
to see Amy this weekend.

What?

It's really good
to see you, Amy.

Good morning, Doctor.

This is my baby.

And I'm just going to accept
that this is my fate,

and I'm gonna marry Adrian
and learn to love her.

Could we ever have sex again?

Could you ever not sleep
with every girl

you got the chance to sleep with?
I'm working on that.

Ricky, it's one thing
to say that.

It's another thing
to actually not do it.

I just thought I'd call.

Oh, for no apparent reason?

No. Just wanted to say hi,
see how you are.

Thanks, Adrian.
I've been wondering how you are, too.

Really? I would've thought Ricky
would've told you this weekend how I am.

Oh, no. We really didn't have
a lot of time to talk about you.

Oh? Why is that?

He was only here for a short time,
and we had a lot to discuss.

Like?

Like stuff about John. So how are you?
How are you feeling?

Just like I told Ricky last week
when he came over

and stayed
half the night talking to me,

I'm feeling good, really good.

So no more morning sickness?

No. You know,

Ben was really upset
that Ricky just took off

and flew to New York
without telling him.

He still loves you. Ben.

He's a nice guy... Ben.

I'm sure he'll be
a responsible dad.

I'm sure.

You know, my dad
really wants us to get married.

I mean, how crazy is that...

Ben and me married?

I mean, everyone knows
that he's in love with you.

He's always been in love
with you,

just like Ricky's always kind of
been in love with me, you know?

Yeah. Well, babies have a way
of making relationships change

whether you want the
relationship to change or not.

What do you mean by that?

I mean, relationships change.

Things happen, babies are born.

Then the babies grow up.
Sometimes so do the parents.

Are you telling me I need to grow up?
Is that what you're saying?

Oh, no, no, no.
That's not what I'm saying at all.

I'm sorry you took it that way.
Please don't take it that way, Adrian.

I really want us to be friends.
And I think we have a good sh*t at being friends.

I do, because it's a very difficult
experience having a baby in high school,

and, you know, girls tend to relate to
each other based on common experiences.

Well, we also have the common
experiences of Ben and Ricky.

Actually, I've never had sex
with Ben, remember?

Oh, yeah. I forgot.

Well, he surprised me.

It was a lot of fun.

It was the only time I've ever seen
him let loose and enjoy himself.

I don't think we should be talking
about what the two of you did.

It's all very personal
and private and all that.

I'm just saying

maybe you should
sleep with him.

Adrian, I don't think I'm gonna have sex
again with anyone I'm not marrying.

You and Ricky... you're not thinking
of getting married, are you?

You didn't get married
this past weekend, did you?

Adrian, Ricky and I decided to keep what
happened this weekend between the two of us.

But then you'll tell
Lauren and Madison,

and Madison will tell Jack,
and Jack will tell Grace,

and she'll tell Ben, so you
might as well just tell me.

Can't. Sorry.
Why don't we talk about something else?

Because I wanna know what's
going on between you and Ricky,

and I would think you would wanna know
what's going on between me and Ricky.

No. No, that's between
Ricky and you.

Just tell me!

Closing time.

Good night, and good luck,
and may the best man win,

and may that be before
you two come back tomorrow.

What's that supposed to mean...
"May the best man win"?

Trying to make light
of a dark situation.

It's not funny.
He saw Amy.

He went to New York this weekend and
didn't even tell me that he was going.

It wasn't any of your business. And you know what?
It's still not any of your business.

Or any of mine.

The only thing that's my
business is this butcher shop.

And if the two of you
wanna keep your jobs,

I suggest you get together
and talk it out

and come back tomorrow
with a new attitude

before I give you
your walking papers.

How are we supposed
to talk about anything

when everything
is none of my business?

It's between Amy and me, okay?

Fine. Amy will tell Madison
and Lauren what happened,

Madison will tell Jack, Jack will
tell Grace, and Grace will tell me.

But I'm not gonna tell you.

I'm gonna tell you both
one more time.

Talk it out outside of the shop

and come back tomorrow
with a new attitude.

Tell me.
Tell me. Tell me!

You're fired.

Both of us?

So, are you and Amy
getting back together?

If I don't sleep with any other women
for the rest of my life, maybe.

Hi, Adrian.

* Falling in love *

* Is such an easy
thing to do *

* Birds can do it
We can do it *

* Let's stop talking
Let's get to it *

* Let's fall in love *

So she didn't call you?
No, she didn't call me, she texted me.

Did they have a good time?
What?

Just wondering.

Just wondering because...

Uh-huh. Because Grace wants to
know if they had a good time.

No, not Grace, Ben.
Ben asked Grace to find out,

and she asked me to find out,
and now I'm asking you.

You know you're gonna tell me sooner or
later, so why don't you just tell me now?

Give me something general,
like he slept in a hotel

because they got into a huge
fight or something like that.

He didn't sleep at a hotel.
He spent the night with her?

You tricked me.

And so what if they spent the
night in the same room together?

So did we.
We didn't do anything.

Hey. What are you
doing in here?

Nothing.
Something.

Nothing.
Is that your phone?

This one? No.
This isn't my phone.

This is Madison's phone.
She left it at home.

I was just
returning it to her room.

Are you reading
her text messages

while you
return it to her room?

I have a good reason.
Excuse.

Lauren's dad called me.

Hey, Dad.

You startled me.
What are you doing here?

I just came by to say hello
to you and your brother.

Mom and David took Jason out
to get some stuff for med camp.

He wants to look
all professional this year.

Last year, apparently
he took a lot of shorts

and no one
was wearing shorts, and...

What'd I do?

I don't know.
What did you do?

I didn't do anything.

Maybe you did,
and maybe you didn't,

but when I was talking
to Jason yesterday,

he said you spent the night
at Madison's Friday night.

I've spent the night over at
Madison's lots of Friday nights.

Yeah, but I don't think you spent the
night over there last Friday night.

And before you say anything,

let me ready you an e-mail
I got from you yesterday.

"I hope no one finds out

"we're at that guest house.

"You better not tell anyone...

"anyone... we're at
that guest house

because my parents
would k*ll me."

What guest house would that be?

What e-mail would that be?

The one obviously
intended for Madison.

Rats.
How did I do that?

I don't know,
but you did do that.

What guest house?

Jack's guest house.

You spent the night at Jack's
guest house with Jessie.

It wasn't quite like that.

Whoa. Whoa.
Put that on hold.

Who are you texting?
Madison?

Yes.

Lauren, I'm surprised at you.

Me, too.

What did you do?
Hey, Dad.

Jason.
Get out of here.

Don't you wanna see
my new shirts?

No, I don't.

Hi, Kenny.
How's it hanging?

Hi, Dave.
Do you mind, both of you?

I'd like a few minutes
to talk to my daughter alone.

Is this a family matter?
Because Lauren's my daughter, too.

Not really. No, she isn't.

Not for purposes
of this discussion she's not.

Ooh.

You really stepped
in it, didn't you?

What's going on?

Jason, out.

Bye.

Is there a problem?

I can handle it.

I'm sure you can, but...

Hey, surgeons don't operate

on their own family members,
so maybe you shouldn't...

Maybe I shouldn't what?

Do you want me to stay here?
You want me to stick around?

No, Dave.
Thanks, but no.

Because if you want me...
She doesn't want you, Dave.

Thank you for that.

I really think this should
be between the two of us.

You mean, between
the three of us, don't you?

Dad and I need to talk,
just the two of us.

Well, I'll decide that.

Look, I just wanna talk
to my daughter, all right?

So you came
all the way over to the house,

unannounced, to talk
to our daughter about what?

I spent the night with Jessie
over at Jack's guest house.

But we didn't do anything.
You lied?

You lied to me and told me that you
were spending the night at Madison's,

so I don't know if I care

if anything more
than that happened or not.

You are on restriction,
young lady, for the summer.

No Jessie, okay? The two of you
are not gonna spend this summer

doing what I know
you want to do.

So no Jessie.

And next time, call.

You're supposed to call me before
you just drop by over here.

That's our agreement.

I didn't do anything.

They're right outside.
Put that down.

I pay for the phone.
Put it down.

Put it on the bed and back away,
Morgan, before anyone gets hurt.

Uh, what's going on?

Red alert from Lauren.
You tell me.

What are you doing
with my phone?

I'll let you two talk.
No, you can stay.

I don't wanna be in the
middle of this one. What one?

Were you reading
my text messages?

I got a call from Lauren's dad asking
if she slept over here on Friday night.

Um, I...

slept over...

not here Friday night.

Where?

You slept over where
on Friday night?

Okay, I slept at Jack's guest
house, but we didn't do anything.

I slept on the bottom bunk
with Lauren,

and Jessie was on top.

On the top bunk.

And Jack was all the way across the
room in a chair and so was Tom.

You lied. That's the thing, Madison.
You lied.

All right. I... I lied,

but only because I knew you wouldn't
let me do what I really wanted to do.

Uh-oh.
And that would be?

I want to go to Phoenix with Jack
for a week to visit his parents.

No.

Okay, that's it.

That's the end of you and Jack
right there with that.

Oh, no.

What? Emily,

if she wants to act
like a little child

and stomp her foot
because she doesn't get her way,

then she's certainly not old enough to
spend a week away with her boyfriend.

She's not even old enough
to have a boyfriend.

Morgan...
Emily.

Well, you can't stop me.
Madison.

Emily.
Really, Madison,

you are just too young
to have a serious boyfriend,

and you're too young
to have friends with babies.

And you're not gonna have a baby because
you're not gonna see Jack anymore,

and that is it.

Can I have
my phone back, please?

And who are you texting?
Lauren.

To tell her that we're
not gonna be friends anymore.

And you know what?
We're not gonna be friends anymore either.

I don't wanna be your friend.

I am not your friend.
I am your father.

Hi, Amy.

Hey, Lauren.
What's up?

Nothing good.

Oh.

Well, I'm sorry
I didn't text you back.

I just thought I'd call.
I miss you.

My dad's over here.
He just screwed up

my entire life in one visit.

Your dad dad?
That one.

How?
Oh, I e-mailed him by mistake.

I was e-mailing him
and e-mailing Jessie

and e-mailing Madison,
all of them one after the other.

I guess an e-mail I thought I
sent to Madison went to him.

Oh, that's too bad.

I'm sorry.
What did it say?

Oh, wait.
I have another call.

Can you hang on?
It's probably just Madison.

I'm glad you're still speaking to her,
because I'm not speaking to her.

Oh, and you wanna
know something else?

Amy? You there?

And now he tells me that we can't
be boyfriend and girlfriend anymore

because he thinks we're gonna do
something stupid like get pregnant.

Yeah. That is a pretty
stupid thing to do.

Can I call you back?
I have Lauren on the other line.

Oh, that is so just like her
to try to get to you first.

And I didn't mean stupid.
That was a bad choice of words.

Uh...

Hello? Amy?

Hey.
Here you are.

Oh, hi. I was just talking
to some friends back home.

Hang up.
You're going out with us.

Oh, no. It's okay.
I'm just gonna stay in tonight.

Nope. We're not
taking no for an answer.

You never go out.
Tonight you're going out.

We're gonna take you
to that new club... Pajamas.

And no admittance without
pajamas, so get dressed.

Well, actually, undressed.
Go on. We're gonna wait for you.

Lauren?

Madison?

All right, all right.
I'll just be a minute.

And don't stop
to call John or Ricky or anyone.

Let's go.
It's your night, Amy Juergens.

Hey, there you guys are.

Sorry. Those ladies
at the nursery love to chat.

Can I help you with something?
Got it all under control.

All right. If you don't mind, I'm gonna get
John ready for bed before dinner tonight

'cause I need to run over to my apartment
and take care of some things later.

I'll just be gone about an hour,
if that's okay.

You taking him with you?
I'm gonna ask Ashley if she'll keep an eye on him.

Okay. Let me know
how that goes.

Yeah.

I can't watch John tonight.
Hi, John.

Say hi to Aunt Ashley.
Hi, Aunt Ashley.

Why not?
I'll just be gone an hour.

I don't have an hour.

Ohhh.
It's a private conversation.

We'll just cover our ears.

I don't know why
you're so upset.

I'm the one
who should be upset.

You told everyone
I was in New York.

You didn't have to do that.

It wasn't anyone's business
if I was in New York.

Your sister and I
needed to talk.

Do you really think
you're in love with Amy?

I don't know.

All I know is I might
wanna find that out

before she's in love
with someone else

or I fall in love
with someone else,

because your sister and I
have a baby together.

And you really think
you're ready for a relationship?

A monogamous relationship?
You?

I might be.

I could be.

Yeah, you could be,
but that would mean

that you'd have to commit
to being with Amy

and only Amy
for the rest of your life.

The rest of your life.

Let me say that again.
The rest of your life.

So?
So I doubt you're ready.

All right.
That's what I need the hour for.

I wanna go to therapy tonight.

So, will you watch John or not?

I'll watch him!

I hate being in a house

where everyone can hear
everything I'm saying.

Thank you.
I appreciate it.

You're welcome.

Hi, honey. I'm home.

So, how was it?

It was great.
It was really great.

I have so much stuff to tell you
that Donovan and I came up with.

But how was your day?
Dull as dishwater, just like I like it.

I don't know, George. I don't know
if you're really gonna be satisfied

staying at home watching Robie
and cooking and cleaning.

Who's staying at home?
We went to the park with Moose after you left

and went to the pet store
and let Moose get some new toys.

Then we came home and cleaned up
and had some lunch and took a nap.

Then we watched Oprah
while we folded some laundry.

Now he's sleeping, and I'm making dinner.
Piece of cake.

How did you find the time to go
to the park and watch Oprah?

I never had the time to go to the
park and watch Oprah. I don't know.

Is that bouillabaisse?
Oui.

I love you.
I love you.

Oh, knock it off before no one
can enjoy the bouillabaisse.

Why don't we tell her?

What? No, it's supposed
to be a surprise.

Oh, I hate surprises.

Your dad and I
are getting married again.

Like I said, I hate surprises.

Well, it's not that big
of a surprise, is it?

It's not such a big surprise
that you hate it, is it?

No. It's more like I don't care.
No one cares.

You're as married/divorced as
you were when you were married.

So if you wanna get married
again, get married again.

Thank you. I think we're going
to as soon as Amy gets back.

Oh, something else
to look forward to.

Let's call Amy and tell her.

Yeah, more fun.

You want to?
Let's do it.

Do we have to?

You know, every party has a pooper,
and that's what we invited you for.

Party pooper, party pooper.

* 'Cause I'm ready *

* To break free *

* Comes to me *

* I've been waiting *

Dad, is that you?

Where are you?
I'm at a club.

You're at a club?
At a club? Really?

Who's at a club?
Amy.

We just called
to tell you some good news.

What's she doing at a club?

Dad, I can't hear you.
Talk louder.

What kind of club?
What kind of club?

It's a pajama club.
You have to wear pajamas to get in.

Pajama club. You have to wear
pajamas to get in. Interesting.

Not really.
I'll be back.

Amy, your dad and I
are getting married again.

Really? Tonight?
No, not tonight.

What?
I can't hear you.

What?
Just hang up.

Okay, Amy,
I'll talk to you later.

I love you. Bye.

So, when Amy gets back?

When Amy gets back.

* Comes to me *

* I've been waiting *

There you go, Lady Liberty.

* For so long *

* Now I'm ready *

Need some help with that?

No, I don't.

But...thanks.

You're welcome.

I thought you were staying
home tonight with John.

I thought that's why
you couldn't come over.

Change of plans. See you.
Wait. Not so fast.

How was New York?
New York was New York.

I talked to Amy.

Amy didn't tell you anything about New York.
I know she didn't.

She didn't have to
tell me anything.

I could read between the lines.

And, well, she sounded as if...

Never mind.

As if what? I don't know.
It's just that...

Just that what?

I guess I can tell you.

I mean, we're friends,
so why not?

Look, I think maybe you confuse
Amy by going to see her.

How's that?

You know she loves Ben.

She's always loved Ben, and now
she won't even speak to Ben.

She wasn't speaking
to Ben anyway.

I think that has something
to do with you, not me.

It could, but...

Look, I think someone
at the program

told Amy she should be
with the father of her baby

and that all girls should be
with the father of their babies,

even if they're in love
with another guy.

Did Amy say that?
Not exactly, no.

But she's not...

She's not trying to get you to marry
her or something like that, is she?

I mean, that's what they probably
tell those girls at those programs...

to get the baby's father
to marry them.

I mean, that's what
my own father is telling me...

to get Ben to marry me.

But like I told you,
I would never marry Ben

because he loves Amy,
and they belong together.

And what?
We belong together?

We don't belong
together, Adrian.

I'd like to be friends
if that's possible,

but we don't belong together.

You're having Ben's baby,
not my baby.

Ben's baby.
So maybe Ben and Amy

weren't meant to be after all.

And maybe like your father said,
you and Ben should get married.

I think you should get married.

How come you're moving
the baby seat out of the car?

You going out?
I'm going to therapy.

No, I don't think so.

You don't move the baby seat out
of the car to go to therapy.

You move the baby seat
out of the car

when you're planning
on getting together with,

well, whoever you can get
together with.

I know you really well.

Good night.

Ricky, I know you, and I accept
who you are, unlike Amy.

She is never gonna understand
you the way I understand you.

Good. I'm glad, all right?

I don't want her
to accept me or understand me.

I want her to change me.

No one can change you, Ricky.

And no one can change you.
Good night.

Hey, you coming with us?

Oh, you're still here?
I thought you and Betty had left.

No, it's still early.
You coming?

No. I think I'm gonna go over
and see Grace tonight.

Grace? Why is that?
I thought I might

ask her opinion
about a ring for Adrian.

A ring?
What kind of ring?

You know what kind of ring.
I don't think I do.

You can't be talking
about an engagement ring

while you're walking around here
still crying

'cause Amy hasn't called you and told
you all about last weekend with Ricky.

I could be.

You're gonna marry Adrian

to get back at Amy
for not calling you?

Did you not learn your lesson

when you had sex with Adrian
to get back at Amy?

Guess not.

Wait until Amy gets home.

Wait until you sit down
and talk to her.

Clear the air,
give it some time,

and as things go along, see how
you feel about Adrian, all right?

No, not "all right."

I'm just gonna marry Adrian
and get it over with.

Not out of spite
you're not. Uh-uh.

I thought that you and Ruben wanted
me and Adrian to get married.

We do. But we want you and
Adrian to want to get married.

If you don't wanna get married, it's not gonna
be a good marriage for either one of you.

And you can't get married
out of spite, you hear me?

I hear you.
But you know what?

I'm a big boy now, and I'm
gonna do what I'm gonna do.

Yeah, unless, of course,
I tell you you can't.

You can't get married. When and if the
time is right, I'll go along with it.

But I'm not gonna go along with it
right now under these circumstances.

Then how's this?

I accept that Amy and I are not
ever going to be together.

Maybe because I'm having
a baby with Adrian,

or maybe because
she had a baby with Ricky,

or maybe for no reason at all other
than it was just never meant to be.

But I'm going to suck it up,
I'm gonna be responsible,

and I'm gonna marry the woman who's
gonna be the mother of my child.

And unlike Ricky, I wanna do
that before the baby gets here.

Unlike Ricky.
Unlike Ricky.

You don't wanna be like Ricky.
I don't wanna be like Ricky.

What's being or not being like
Ricky have to do with anything?

Okay. Fine.
Don't be like Ricky.


Go over to Adrian's house
and tell her father

that you wanna marry her, 'cause
that's just what he wants to hear.

You wanna do it, do it.
I change my mind.

I'm not gonna stop you.
Go ahead.

You wanna get married,
get married.

For whatever reason or no
reason at all. I will.

Go. Maybe after I
go over to Grace's.

Yeah. Pick out the ring first.

That's the important thing...
picking out the ring.

That and trying
to put it on the finger

of your best friend's
ex-girlfriend

because he screwed up your life

by getting
your girlfriend pregnant

before she was even
your girlfriend.

Hey, Benjamin.

Uh, Leo, Bunny wants you
to call her before we go out.

Really?
Mm-hmm.

She called here at the house?
Mm-hmm. Yep.

She said she didn't
wanna disturb you,

and she said that she wanted

to apologize
for what she had to do.

Yep, that was the message...

that she really wanted to talk
to you about what she had to do.

What'd she have to do?
I don't know.

What'd she have to do?

I don't know.

Are you sure you don't know?
You were at the shop all day.

I guess she might be
referring to the fact

that she had to let me go.

Let you go where?
She fired you?

You got fired from the family business...
a business with our name on it?

For what?
Attacking Ricky.

He wouldn't tell me what
happened with Amy last weekend.

For the love of Pete.
Is he dead... Ricky?

Because, well, if he is dead,

she's gonna need Ben
more than ever.

I mean, not that I would want
Ricky to be dead.

It's just that if... if...

Ricky isn't dead, is he?

I mean,
is he hurt or something?

Unfortunately, no.
He lives and lives on in John.

So that's what's driving you
to get married.

You got angry with Ricky and got
yourself fired from the job,

and now you wanna get married.

I don't know how much more
of this I can take, Ben,

without losing my temper.

Without really
losing my temper.

And no one wants
to see me really lose my temper!

Jeez, Ben.

I'm really hungry.

I mean, this probably means we're
not gonna go to dinner now.

Probably.
I should've just told him.

I thought I had more time
before he found out,

and I'd use that time wisely
to do something stupid.

Well, look, Ben,

you can't just run around
and go attacking some guy

because he's... he's with
a woman you can't have.

You know?
Yeah, I know.

And you can't run around
and marry some girl

just because she's the woman
you can have.

Yes, I can, Betty.

Unfortunately, I can,
and I'm going to.

Probably.

Hey, Dr. Fields, right?

Right. Aren't you...

Leo Boykewich.

Right.

My daughter goes to school
with your son.

Lauren. She's Amy Juergen's
best friend.

Oh, right. Lauren.
Nice girl.

So, how's the shrink business?

A patient didn't show up.

I had my own problems
I needed to deal with tonight,

so I left my family
and went back to the office,

and then the patient
doesn't show up.

So the shrink business stinks.

Thanks for asking.

Nights like this make me think

I should just quit
while I'm ahead.

Not that I'm ahead, I mean.

Nights like this make me think I
should get out of the meat business.

My son, Ben,
got fired from his job

at our butcher shop
this afternoon.

I mean, he's obsessed
with Amy, and...

You know,

my daughter lied

about where she was spending
the night Friday night.

I found out, and now her mother

has forbid her
from seeing this guy.

I don't think she and this guy
were doing anything.

I don't think
they were doing anything.

It's just that she lied
about where she was.

They weren't doing anything.

They weren't.

Why'd she lie?

They wanted to spend
the night together.

To do what?

To do...nothing.

I mean, what teenage boy isn't
gonna do it if he can do it?

I wish it weren't true, but...

Statistics say otherwise.

Only half of teenagers
have sex in high school.

What, and the other half
are girls?

Who are all these boys
doing it with, huh?

They're not all doing it.
They're not.

That's how Ben
got into trouble.

He had the chance,
he took it, and now...

And now he's having a baby.

I'm scared to death that's
what's gonna happen to Lauren,

which is why I got upset
about her lying.

But they weren't
doing anything.

They weren't.

Ben and Adrian had sex
to get back at Ricky and Amy.

Now he actually wants to marry
Adrian to get back at Ricky and Amy.

I mean, the two of them, if they wanted
to get married, that would be one thing.

But to get married
out of spite.

Can you believe that?
Married?

My 16-year-old son is having a
baby and he wants to get married,

and it all comes
from getting back

at a ex-girlfriend
and his best friend.

I mean, what kind
of marriage is that?

What kind of life is that to be married
to someone you don't wanna be married to?

How's your marriage going?

You got married recently,
didn't you?

Yeah. Yeah, I did.

And?

We're happy.
We're very happy.

Very happy.
Both of you?

Look, I only answer
for myself, of course.

You're very happy.

You don't look very happy.

You know, maybe I'll
call your office. Mmm.

I'll tell you
what my problem is.

I want my family back.

I want my wife back.

Yeah.

Yeah, me, too.

But in my case,
that's not possible.

But in your case...

She remarried.

Oh. She's not dead, is she?

No.

No, she isn't.

Come in.

Oh. Hey, Ben.

Grace isn't home.

She and Grant went to pick
up some things for med camp.

Or at least that's where
she said she was going.

They're probably out somewhere
making out.

Okay.
You can wait here if you want.

Can I?
Yeah. Why not?

It's not your house?

Yeah, well, no one's home, so...
Mmm.

Madison's dad
is making us break up.

I'm thinking
about getting married.

Oh, well, if you're thinking about marrying
Grace, you're out of luck, and so am I.

I think she's in love
with this Grant guy.

No, I'm not thinking about
marrying Grace.

I'm thinking
about marrying Adrian.

I just feel compelled
to marry her.

Because of the baby?
Yeah. Sort of.

And because I think it's unfair

that Amy's getting back
together with Ricky.

I mean, I think she is.
I have a feeling she is.

Why couldn't I have just gotten
her pregnant instead of Adrian?

Wasn't she already pregnant
when you met her?

Yes. Yes, she was,

but I fell in love
with her anyway.

What is this, a meeting
of the lonely hearts club?

We need to get out there
and get our women back.

How are you supposed
to get Tammy back?

Forget it.
She's married, Tom.

Every relationship
can be broken.

Not every relationship.
Not Ricky and Amy apparently.

Every relationship.

How'd I get myself into this?

I just wanted to have some fun.

Yeah, that's how most people
get into it.

Where are your parents? They're at a medical
fund-raiser for some kids in Africa.

And you're okay with this?
I'm okay with this.

What is this?
We're just making out.

We've made out before.

Not with our shirts off.

Uh, I said with your shirt off.

Yeah, okay. What about pants?
Pants off?

No. Pants on.
All pants stay on.

Especially underpants,

which I prefer to call knickers.

Knickers, huh?

How about knickers on
but pants off?

Uh, I don't know
how I feel about that.

You like to dance?

We could have
a pants-off dance off.

Really?

That sounds fun.

Or we could just dance,

because I have a feeling
that if anything comes off,

we'll get ourselves into a
situation we can't get out of.

And what would that
situation be?

That situation would be sex.

Yeah.

I don't wanna have sex.

I wanna have sex,

but it may be a little early
in the relationship to have sex.

Besides, we have the whole
summer to have sex at med camp.

Do they even check to see
if the car's in the driveway?

No. They hear we're out
for the evening,

and they think we're out
for the evening.

Did you hear that?

No, I didn't hear that.

What didn't I hear?

He said they have the whole
summer to have sex at med camp.

Yeah, that's what he said...
that Grant.

Well, he's right, you know?
They do.

And that's part of
what med camp's for, you know?

To get these young, would-be,
could-be doctors into bed together

and get them ready
for medical school.

What? I'm joking,
Kathleen, all right?

I'm joking.
Look, teenagers

don't need med camp as an excuse
to have sex with each other.

No. They just need
a pants-off dance off.

A what?
Yeah, that's what he suggested...

a pants-off dance off.

Interesting approach.

Points for creativity.

They're not gonna have sex, all right?
Not yet.

You don't know that.

Oh, I know that.

Hey, Grace, we're home!

Thank you.

So, do you dance?

Shut up.

We can't do it again.
I have to go.

You don't have to go.
I don't have to go.

No one has to go anywhere
until we're ready to go.

You said you only have an hour.
It's been an hour and a half.

I know. But it was
really nice. Really.

What happened in New York?

Someone promise someone
he'd be faithful?

Yeah. It makes me run
in the other direction, too.

We didn't agree to be faithful.

I'm not breaking
any promises here,

and she's not breaking
any promises there.

Even if she is out at a club?

Even if she is.

All we said was
we'd think about it.

Well, I like the way you think.

Good night, all right?

I had a really nice time.

Really nice.

But I have to go.

Call me, or don't call me.

Good night.

Good night.

No text from Ricky?

No.

No text from Madison or Lauren?

No.

From your sister?
No.

Not even from your mom or dad?

No, but whatever.
I had a really nice time.

You should have a picture.

All right.

Nice.

What are you doing?
I'm sending it to Ricky.

Whatever. Let's go.

We have class tomorrow.
It's late.

It's late.
We have class.

We shouldn't have any fun.

We're mommies.

Enjoy it. The real world is coming
back sooner than you think.

What are you doing here?

Your dad let me in.

Oh, did he?

Hmm. Nice of him to ask me
if I wanted company.

Sorry. But, uh,
I saw that your light was on,

and I left my phone at home, and I was out
driving around, thinking about things,

and I just felt
like seeing you.

So Amy still didn't
call you, huh?

No.

She might if
you had your phone.

No, I don't think so.

I'll just wait to talk to her
when she gets back.

Mm-hmm.

So I guess you talked to Ricky?

I saw him out
in front of the house.

Be careful. The front of
the house can be trouble.

Yeah, it can be.

But as far as Ricky goes,

I think that trouble is over.

I'm over him.
Are you?

Maybe.

Look, Ben, we've been
acting like idiots

because we're not ready
to let go of Amy and Ricky.

And as ridiculous as that is,
it's true.

Yeah.

Here's what I'm thinking.

And don't think that I don't
care for you, because I do.

And I care for you,

but let's face it, we're not
in love with each other.

No. So what would happen
if we got engaged?

What would happen if Amy and Ricky
thought that we were gonna be

unavailable to them
for the rest of our lives?

Okay, if you give me a ring,

I think my dad might insist
you marry me.

I would know
it was a fake engagement,

and you would know
it was a fake engagement,

but if no one else knew
it was a fake engagement

and my father
thought it was real,

I just don't know
if you could get out of it,

or if we could get out of it.

I'd be willing to take that chance.
Would you?

I think you should
text them all.

No. I don't care,
really.

You do, too, care.
And you know what?

You should say that you care.

You should say how you feel.
You should let people know.

If you are upset about something,
you need to let them know.

That's what we've been
talking about in group.

Been talking about
not trying to be perfect

just because
we totally screwed up.

I mean, we still have feelings,

and some of those feelings
towards people are not so great.

Your feeling towards your friends
and family tonight, for example.

I mean, you could
let them know in a nice way,

but you should let them know.

Here. Let me take
another picture...

a picture that you
can send to everyone.

And put "Happy birthday to me"
as the subject.

I don't know.

Do it.

Wait. It's Ricky.

That's sweet, but why
would he send me that?

I'll tell you why.

Because he thinks you're
out at a club having fun

while poor Ricky
is home alone with John,

which I doubt, by the way.

He probably just got home.

That sounds about right.

Happy birthday, Amy.
Post Reply