04x19 - The Splits

[bunniefuu]

Yeah, I want to
get out, too.

That's your summer,
school and work.

Those are the
choices you made,
so live with it.

Good morning, Ben.

Good morning...

I'm Ben's cousin.

And who's this?

I'm not Grace's cousin.

I'm her brother.

He's not my brother.

Who told you
he's my brother?

I thought we were this
upstanding Christian family

but as it turns out,
we're just as screwed up
as everyone else.

Dylan and her friends
have been at school
with Ben all day.

All day?

I'm just trying
to be a friend.

Well, if you like Jacob,
and you're on his side,
then you are not my friend.

So you're basically just
breaking up with me and Jesse
for a second time?

I'd like to look at it
more as I'm letting go.

You want to
go out with Dylan,
go out with Dylan.

I know there's
a catch to this.

There is a catch to this.

You're responsible for
anything that happens.

And I'm not.

♪ There you were

♪ Beautiful

♪ The promise of love
was written on your face

♪ You led me on
with untrue kisses

♪ You held me c*ptive
in your false embrace

♪ Quicker than I could
bat an eye

♪ Seems you were
telling me goodbye

♪ Just a minute ago
your love was here

♪ All of a sudden
it seemed to disappear

♪ Sweetness was only
heartache's camouflage

♪ The love I saw in you
was just a mirage

♪ We used to meet
in romantic places

♪ You gave the illusion
that your love was real

♪ Now all that's left
are lipstick traces

♪ From the kisses
you only pretended to feel

♪ And now
our meetings you avoid

♪ And so my world
you have destroyed

♪ Just a minute ago
your love was here

♪ All of a sudden
it seemed to disappear

♪ The way you wrecked my life
was like sabotage

♪ The love I saw in you
was just a mirage

♪ You only filled me
with despair

♪ By showing love
that wasn't there

♪ Just like
the desert shows... ♪

Hi, there.

Oh, Ben,
don't you look nice!

Yeah, and he smells nice.
I can smell him from here.

Thanks, Dad.

So, where are you
taking her?
Geoff's.

Did you make
a reservation?
You need me to call?

No, Dad.
I don't need you to call.
I made a reservation.

Well, we hope
you have a wonderful time.

Oh, dear.
Did I just say "we?"

I'm sorry.
It's embarrassing.

Aw, come on,
I think we can say we

if we want to say we,
can't we?

Come on, you two
are disgusting.

I'll see you around midnight.
She has a curfew.

Just make sure you,
uh... Never mind.

I said I was going to
leave you alone and let you
make your own decision,

I'll leave you alone
and let you make
your own decision.

Just remember to, uh...

Have a good time.
Have a good time.

But not too good of a time.

Good night.

Bye.

He's so grown up.

He's grown up all right.
He's been married,
he's lost a child,

and his divorce papers
are sitting over there
on my desk.

And he doesn't know?

Seemed like the wrong night
to give them to him.

Yeah.

I got mine, too.
It's official.

Oh? Well, that's nice.

I mean, you know,
that they finally
came through.

Not that it's not sad, but...

It's not sad.

♪ Falling in love
is such an easy
thing to do

♪ Birds can do it
We can do it

♪ Let's stop talking
Let's get to it

♪ Let's fall in love

(CHUCKLES)
Wait. Oh, wait.

Okay, Mom, that's enough.
such a big deal.

Yeah, she still has to
before it's an actual date.

I know, but once she does,
This is so exciting. dating!

It's a little too exciting.

I just want everyone
to calm down.

This is what
normal girls do.

They go out on dates,
it's no big deal, okay?

Okay, you got
your cell phone?
Yes.

Cell phone's charged?
Yes.

You got money with you?

Yes. I have
money with me.

Okay. You know,
sometimes guys like Ben,

they think that
they are entitled
to anything they want.

You've met Ben,
he's not like that.

And there's
no one else like Ben.

No, probably not.

There's probably not
another high school senior

getting divorced
after losing a baby

who's going out with a girl
who's going out
on her first date.

Okay, that's enough, Robert.

Yeah, and don't...
(DOORBELL RINGS)

Hey! Stop right there,
both of you.

I'll get the door.

No funny business.

No pot smoking,
no fooling around,

dinner and come home.
make out in the driveway.

I know the rules.

Hello, Cecilia.
These are for you.

Oh.

And Dylan,
these are for you.

Smooth.

And the pressure is on.
no one was disappointed.

You're so thoughtful.
Thank you, Ben.

Yes, thank you.
How sweet.

Sweet.

I had Cubans for you,
but Dylan said
you'd given that up.

Yes, I hope to live
long enough to see Dylan
graduate from high school

and then graduate
from college.

And then start her career

and then get married
and then have
my grandchildren.

And in that order.

Not that other people
can't do it in another order

and still turn out to be
very fine people, Robert.

Okay, we better get going.

Midnight.

Or before if you want,
feel free to come home
before midnight.

That's it?
No inquisition?

No, I think
Let's just go..

Oh.

Oh.

(SIGHS)
He's a nice boy.

He's weird.

Hey.

Hi.

I found your mail
we left out for recycling.

Oh. Really?
Yeah.

Wonder how it got there.

(SIGHS) So,
how is your mom?

Fine.

Did you talk to her
about Jacob?

No, not really.

Other than to tell her that
Amy was nosing around
at school today.

Was she?

Yeah, she came up to me
at my locker and she was like,

"I met your brother,
he's so nice."

And?

And everybody was just
standing around waiting
to see what she was gonna say,

and waiting to see
what I was gonna say.

It's like she was taking
my personal tragedy

and putting it on display
for the entire world.

Look, Grace,
I know it was a shock
but it's not a tragedy.

I suffered a tragedy.

That's not a tragedy.
Look, just talk to the guy.

You know you're gonna
talk to him sooner or later,
so just talk to him.

I don't want to talk to him.
And I know what you
went through was a tragedy

but that doesn't mean
that this isn't a tragedy too.

My whole life has been
ruined by this guy.

It's like, it's like
losing my father twice!

Or it could be like
finding your father again.

And your father wouldn't
want you to be like this.

No, he definitely wouldn't.
And he didn't want me
to know about Jacob.

Obviously. 'Cause if he had
wanted me to know,
he would have told me.

Maybe he didn't tell you
because he couldn't.

Couldn't?
Yeah.

Maybe he couldn't.
Look, who knows when
he even found out.

Your family was
always so happy,
you were happy.

If he told you,
he probably figured that

you would never be
happy again.

So whenever he found out,
he just lived with it

and he was the one
who was never happy again.

How do you know?
Maybe he was twice
as happy as the rest of us

and none of us were
ever really happy because
it was all fake, fake, fake!

Where are you going?
We're just talking,

I'm just trying
to talk to you.

Yeah. About Jacob.
And I do not want
to talk about Jacob.

Why won't everyone
just leave me alone!

And why does everybody
want to give him what he wants

but nobody wants to
give me what I want?

Because it's impossible
to give you what you want.

The guy exists,
and you can't
pretend he doesn't.

(SIGHS)

I didn't come by here
to get a lecture.

I just wanted to come
pick up a shirt.

Jeez, all I said to Grace
was that I met Jacob
and he's a really nice guy.

Well, obviously
Grace doesn't want to
talk about him, Ames.

What, did she call you
and cry to you

because I said
something to her?

Oh, please, Wife Number One
called you and said
something to you

because Grace said
something to her.

That is ridiculous!
We're seniors!

We're all grown up now
and Grace still has to have
her mommy call my daddy

because I did something
mean to her?

Just call her
and apologize.

I've got a two-year-old
who wants his
favorite pajama shirt

before he'll go
to bed tonight.

And I haven't eaten,
I'm hungry

and all you care about is
Wife Number One's daughter?

No, that's not
all I care about.

No, it isn't, is it?
She's married you know,

just in case you were
thinking of trying to
get back with her

or anything stupid like that.

Kathleen Bowman-Tsegaye
is married.
For the third time now.

I know that.

Why can't you and Mom
just work things out
once and for all?

Your mother is gallivanting
around Europe with
your sister, and you know...

I know what?

Don't you and Ricky talk?

About Mom being gay? No.
You know why?
Because she's not.

And when would Ricky and I
even have time to talk?

I get up,
I get ready for school,

I get John ready
for his day.

I drop John off,
I go to school,

I go to the nursery
after school, we go home,

we have dinner,
we clean up and we go to bed.

There's no talking.

These are the good old days,
you'll see.

No, I won't see.
Ugh. I have to go.

Call Grace when you
get home, all right?

You're not like seeing
Kathleen or anything, are you?

She's married.

Do you come here
all the time?

Everyone seems to know you.

Yeah, my dad and I eat here
all the time.

Did you ever eat here
with your wife?

With Adrian?

Yeah, we came here
a couple of times,

but I was coming here
long before Adrian.

My mom and dad used
to bring me here
when I was growing up,

so it feels like
a family place to me.

Really, it holds
no special meaning
for Adrian and me.

Did you ever
bring Amy here?

Yeah.

I thought about
going someplace that
neither of us had been before,

but I was nervous.

I don't want anything
to go wrong

especially after waiting
this long to go out.

Me neither.

I hope I haven't
made you uncomfortable.

No. Not uncomfortable really.

Just maybe
a little jealous.

Jealous? Of?

Adrian and Amy.

I mean, you've been through
so much with each of them

and you even
married Adrian.

Believe me,
Adrian and Amy have
nothing to do with us.

Of course not.
As long as you don't have
anything to do with them.

Because I could be
extremely jealous.

I actually
kind of like that.

Really?

Well, you wouldn't be jealous
if you didn't really care
about me, would you?

No, I wouldn't.

+

if he's not even
seeing Kathleen?

That doesn't even
make any sense.

I don't know.
Can we talk about that later?
Or not talk about it at all?

I mean, I'm surprised
he's not taking
some pleasure

in finding out that
her marriage wasn't
so perfect after all.

He always thought that
she one-upped him somehow

by marrying a doctor
and getting a bigger house...

Hey, can you stop that?

Don't we have
an agreement about
not talking in bed?

Um, one, this isn't a bed
until we make it into one,

and two, no we do not
have an agreement
about not talking in bed.

Could we make one?

Ricky, I'm serious
about this.

About what?

I don't want my dad
to go out with Grace's mom.

It's none of our business.

Well, can we make it
our business?

Can't you talk
to him about it?
About Kathleen?

No.
Why not?

Because I don't want
to get involved.

Oh, you'd rather spend
Christmas and holidays

with my dad, Kathleen
and my mom?

Do you know
how miserable
my mom would be?

Maybe she wouldn't be
miserable at all,
and if he's happy...

He would never be happy
remarrying his first wife

and I would never be happy
having Grace as my sister.

Ugh. Can you imagine?

No.

Come on, Ricky,
just point out to him that
it would be a mistake, please.

He'll listen to you.

I don't want to talk
about this, all right?

Not to you, not to him.

Ugh. You don't want
to talk to me
about anything.

Oh, no, I want to talk to you,
I always want to talk to you.

For example,

I'd really like to talk to you
about when you might
want to get married.

If planning a wedding
is too much pressure,

maybe we could just
run off and get married
this summer, elope.

Elope?

Ugh. I don't want to do that.

(SIGHS)

I told her to apologize,
I don't know if she will,
but I gave it a sh*t.

I just don't think
people realize
how upsetting this is.

I mean,
Grace really needs time
to get used to the idea.

I'm still getting
used to the idea.

It's like I never even knew
who Marshall was.

He was with this woman
for 15 years.

I mean,
it's just unbelievable
and ridiculous and painful.

George, it's very painful.

Yeah. I'm sorry
that happened.
Hey, you don't think...

Nah.
What?

You don't think
that's why doctors

go on all these volunteer
missions, do you?
To cheat on their wives?

No, I don't think that.

Why would any doctor
have to go halfway
around the world

just to cheat on his wife?

Or to cheat on her husband.
I know there are lady doctors.

Is this supposed
to be comforting?

Oh, I thought
you were looking
more for an explanation.

I would like an explanation,
but not from you,
from Marshall Bowman.

Yeah, I don't think
that's gonna happen.

But if the other husband
is cheating, the new one,
maybe he could explain it.

(SCOFFS)

What?
You're not thinking that?

If I were you,
that'd be the first thing
I'd be thinking about.

Not that I want to plant ideas
in your head or anything.

What'd I say?

What did you say?

Oh, nothing. I was
just talking to Kathleen.

Anne is pretty much
halfway around the world
right now, right?

I don't know. Why?

Next time you speak to her,
ask her if she's
fooling around over there.

Why would I do that?

Because I'm asking you to.

I just wish she could
find someone, man or woman.

Why is that?
She deserves to be happy.

No, that's not it.

All right,
I deserve to be happy.

Yeah, that's it.

You think
you can't be happy
unless she's happy?

Not without feeling
guilty about it.

This family
is so screwed up.

I mean, for people
who don't do dr*gs or drink,

you're all still
completely dysfunctional.

You've been talking to Amy,
haven't you?

(CHUCKLES)

Oh, you were playing soccer
with Bonnie and Ronnie
all this time?

Yeah, they're pretty good.
And they're cute kids.

I don't know why
Tom doesn't like them.

Oh, he likes them.
He just doesn't want
to be responsible for them.

Oh, well, their mother
just got home

so she'll take care
of them, I suppose.

Yeah, I suppose she will.

And you are calling
your mother
every day, right?

You promised.

Almost every day, yes.

You know, she keeps
asking about Grace
and how she's doing,

I hate to keep lying to her.

I really want
to talk to Grace.

She'll talk to you.
Just give her time.

She won't even answer
a call from me, or a text.

I'm sure she will eventually.

Tom said he'd take me there,
to her condo.

You know if I wanted
to talk to her face to face.

Take you there how?
Tom doesn't drive,

and I'm sure Rachel
doesn't want to take
the two of you anywhere

after she just
got home from work.

Tom said he would drive.

He said he would
drive you or take you?

He... He probably meant
on the bus.

Tom knows
all the bus routes.

He has them
all memorized.

But, Jacob,
I don't want you
over at Grace's.

And I don't want
you and Tom

riding around
all over the city

on a bus
on a Friday night.

Let her come to you
when she's ready
to talk, all right?

I get the feeling
that's not just a suggestion.

No, it's not.
I'm telling you
not to do that.

No offense, but maybe
I'm a little more mature
than American guys my age.

My mother usually
lets me make my own
personal decisions,

my own rules.

Well, if you want
to stay with me,

you have to go by
my rules,

there are gonna be
rules, Jacob.

Yes, ma'am.

Is my husband cheating on me?

Dr. Tsegaye?

Your mother
runs the hospital,
so she would know.

Has she said anything?

Um, I... I think that
if there are
going to be rules,

then maybe there should
also be boundaries.

I, I'm sorry.
I don't know
what's wrong with me.

Same thing that's wrong
with everyone else.

It's me, having me around.

No, it's really
not you, it's...

Me.

Okay, well,
maybe it is you,

but, well, I'm really happy
you're here, I am.

I mean, we needed
to know the truth,

no matter how difficult
it is to deal with,

we needed to know
the truth about
Marshall Bowman.

And I need to know the truth
about Jeff Tsegaye.

Because
for once in my life,

I would like to
not be living a lie.

So if he's cheating on you,
then you have a reason
to dissolve the marriage.

But if he's not,
you have no reason
to dissolve the marriage.

Other than it's just not
what you want.

What happened
to the boundaries?

You are way too smart for 14.

+

Come on,
if I(crash your car,

I'll get you a new one.

But you couldn't get me
a new you if you crashed it.

Tom, you don't drive.

Where'd you hear that?

Well, you don't, do you?

Of course, I do.
I can drive!

A car?

Yes. A car.

My dad let me drive
all the time.

Do you have a license?

Yes. I have a license.
Don't worry.

But, Tom, you're not
on my insurance.

You're not covered
if you should happen to,
you know, hit someone else.

I will pay
if anything happens.

This is important
to my family.

All right, well,
I'll drive him.

I'll take Jacob
to Grace's condo.

Come on,
we'll get the kids,
we'll get Jacob,

and we'll drop him off
while we go get ice cream.

And then we'll go back,
pick him up
and bring him back here.

I want to drive Jacob myself.

And I would like to let you

because I'm tired
and I just want to
get the kids inside

and get them cleaned up,

and give them a snack,
and read to them,
and go to bed.

But you can't drive my car,
Tom, I'm sorry.

Please.

No.

We'll see about that.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

Hi, Amy.

I just wanted to apologize
about today.

I never should have
brought up, uh, that person.

Especially
when we were at school.
I'm really sorry.

I'm sure that
you're going through
a really tough time,

and if you need me,
I'm sure you'll let me know.

Well, that was really
nice of you, Amy, thank you.

And I will let you know.

I hope you will.
I will.

Because I do consider
you a friend, Grace.

Thank you.

Which makes asking you this
just a little awkward.

But, um, you don't think that

your mom and my dad,
the two of them,

you don't think they're
trying to get back
together again, do you?

My mother is married.

(SCOFFS)

And you know what,
she might be
a little crazy at times

but she's not crazy enough
to leave her husband
for your father.

(HANGS UP)

Uh-huh. Oh, well,
they'll do what
they want to do.

Yeah, none of our beeswax
as my dad says.

Well, they won't
listen to us anyway.
What do we know.

Yeah, I know.
Okay, well it was nice
talking to you, Grace.

Mmm-hmm.
Okay, good night.

She hung up on you, huh?

You weren't going to
find out anything for me.

You could have just
talked to my dad, you know?

Yeah, but I'm not
interested in talking
to him about Kathleen.

But I am interested
in talking to you

about when you think
we should get married.

Amy, come on,
the ring may be
enough for you,

but it's not enough for me.

I don't want to push you,
but I want to get married.

When are you
gonna marry me?

I don't know.

Maybe when you stop
trying to have sex with me

while I'm trying
to talk to you.

You can't keep doing this.

You're going to have to
talk to me at some time
about getting married

or why you don't
want to get married.

(SIGHS)

Hey, my mom told me
you were here.

Why didn't you text me
or call me or something?

It was kind of nice
being by myself.

Especially
by myself in here.

Remember when we used to
come in here and
sneak around and make out?

It was fun.
Yeah, it was fun.

And we could
do that again if
we weren't just friends.

I need a friend.

What's going on?
Who are you hiding from?

Oh, yeah. The guy that
came home from Africa
with your mom.

That's the one.

All right, well, I guess
you'll deal with that

when you're ready
to deal with that.

He looks like him, you know.

Yeah, kind of.

I couldn't help it.
Come on,
he doesn't look like him.

I mean, I wondered
if he was even
telling the truth.

It's in his eyes,
and in his mannerisms,

and how he digests everything
before he'll say anything.

And his smile.

He has that big smile
like my dad had.

It's going to be all right.

Hey, I know
we're just friends,

but, um, would sex
make you feel any better?

(CHUCKLES)
All right.

(CELL PHONE BEEPS)

Mailman.

Thank you.

Can I come in?
Yeah, you can come in,

but I thought
you were hanging
with the guys tonight.

And I thought
you were hanging out
with Grace tonight.

Is Grace here?
No, she's not here.

I tried to talk to her
about her brother again,

and she just can't
deal with it,
so she took off.

Good.

Why is that good?

Because now we have
the place to ourselves.

Yeah, but I don't feel like
doing anything tonight.

So if you just dropped by
to have sex, forget it.

(CHUCKLES)

Okay,

I didn't just drop by
to have sex.

I dropped by because
I didn't buy this whole

"take a night and hang out
with the guys" thing.

Yeah, it's Friday night.
We don't have to do anything.

It's nice just to be
alone with you.

We can just talk. Again.

What do you want to
talk about now?

I've already told you
everything about me.

I'm sure you know
more than you even
want to know.

Okay, why don't we talk
about this for starters?

This envelope has a court
listed as a return address.

Maybe it's jury duty.
I don't want that.

It's not that.
Why don't you open it?

Because it's personal.

Oh, look.
It's already been opened.

Look, don't come over here
and get in my face.

(CHUCKLES) I knew
there was a reason you
didn't want me over tonight.

You are so bad at being
vulnerable, you know that?

Maybe I'm not vulnerable.
So what?

You have your whole life
ahead of you.

(SNIFFLES)

You want to go talk
to Grace or don't you?

I guess it'll have to wait.

I guess it won't.

Tom, your mum says
you don't drive.

She doesn't know.
Your dad taught me.

But you don't have
a license.

I have a license.

Really?
Really. Let's go.

Oh, Betty!

What brings you by
on a Friday night?
Everything all right?

Oh, yeah, yeah.
Everything is fine.

I, uh... I just stopped by
to say hello.

I got some mail today.

Me too.

Uh, but change
is good, right?

Yeah, I... I miss you, Leo.

And you know,
I just want you to know

how grateful I am
for everything that
you've done for me.

Thank you again.

Yeah. Sure.
My pleasure.

Uh, it was really nice of you
to come by and tell me that.

And, uh, good night.

Uh, I know I should have,
uh, called first.

But you know I was, uh,
I was on campus today,

uh, yoknow for orientation.

And, and then, and then
some of the kids
invited me out for pizza.

And then after that
I just... I just really
didn't feel like going home.

You know,
this whole thing
is still new for me.

This, this, this...
This living alone thing.

Uh, in another month,
you'll be in classes.

That's pretty exciting, right?

Yeah, but it's scary too.

You know, I...
I was thinking maybe I could,

you know, live in the dorms
during the week and then,

uh, you know,
just go to my condo
on the weekends.

But I just can't decide
if I'm wasting your money
or if it's a good idea.

You know,
on the one hand,

I feel like, you know,
hanging out with
the other students,

you know, makes me
feel like, you know,
a part of things.

You know, makes me
feel like I can blend in.

But on the other hand,

I might not be able
to get any studying done
in the dorms.

What do you think?

I think you should do
whatever you want.

Give the dorms a try
for a semester

and if it doesn't work out...

Hey, you always
have the condo.

So, uh, good night, Betty.

Leo, you are...
You are like

God and Santa Claus

and Bill Gates

all just, like,
rolled into one,
you know that?

Yes, he is, isn't he?

Hello, Betty.

Good to see you.
I'm sure you and Leo
have a lot to talk about.

So, good night, Leo.
Thanks for dinner.

Oh...

How's that going anyway?

I'd love to see
where you work.

I'd love to see
the butcher shop.

Really? You're a vegetarian.
You want to go to some place
where there are dead cows?

Yeah.

Because it's a part of
your family.
It's a part of you.

All right.
I'll take you sometime.

Why don't we go now?

Now? It's not open now.

You don't have a key?

(SIGHS)
Well, I have a key,

but it's just that,
there are
security cameras around.

We might end up answering
a lot of questions.

And the answer would be
that you just wanted to
show me the butcher shop.

You know, we can't
get into any trouble,

we just can't.

We're not going to
get into any trouble.

+

Did Amy ever
kiss you like that?

No, she didn't.
I don't think.
Try it again.

No, definitely not.

Did Adrian ever
kiss you like that?

No, Adrian never
kissed me like that.

No.
No?

Don't forget
the security cameras.

My dad's in the security
business, you know.

Yeah, I know.

This is hardly
a high-tech system.

I think we can
work around this.

Don't worry,
we're not gonna have sex.

I'm just going to make
kissing me

more exciting than
having sex with
Amy or Adrian.

Hmm.

(CLATTERING)

Did you hear something?

Seriously,
I heard something.

BEN: Sorry, sorry,
it's just... It's us.

Was that Ben?

Ben?

Sorry, uh, we accidentally
knocked over that little,
uh, display area.

Hi.
Hi.

Do you know
what time it is?

11:00? I'm sorry,
are you in bed at 11:00?

Come on in.

Hello.

Hi, Amy, I'm so sorry.
Did we wake you?

Yeah.

Sit down,
I'll get you
something to drink.

You want something
to drink?

No, I'm sure they don't.

We're not gonna stay.
Uh, Dylan just wanted
to see the butcher shop.

I'm Ricky, by the way.

Oh, sorry, um,
this is Ricky.
Ricky, Dylan.

Nice to meet you, Ricky.

This apartment
is so charming.

It has so much character.

(CHUCKLES) Ben's dad
was nice enough
to let me live here

when I wanted to
get out on my own.

And he let us stay
when Amy and I wanted
to live together.

"Wanted?" Is that past tense?

Uh, no,
it is not past tense.

We're very happy
living here.

Obviously.
And that's a beautiful
engagement ring, Amy.

When are you two
getting married?

When I stop trying
to have sex with her.

(LAUGHS)

(FAKE CHUCKLE)

I've, uh, I've been trying
to settle on a date

but I haven't even been
able to pencil in
anything on the calendar

because Ricky and I just
can't keep our hands
off of each other.

(CHUCKLES) So thanks
for interrupting us

because now that
Amy's hands are free,

I'll get a calendar
and we can settle
on something,

even if it's just
a time of year,
a season, anything.

So stick around.
Maybe you can help us.

What do you think
would be a good date?

When's a gootime
to get married?

I think we better go.

Yeah, it sounds as if maybe
we came at a bad time.
BEN: Yeah.

(CHUCKLES) Wait.
Ben, how did you and Amy

pick a date
for your wedding
when you got married?

I think it was based
on my due date.

Good night.

Maybe the four of us
can go out some time...
Good night.

(CHUCKLES UNCOMFORTABLY)

You are such a jerk!

Pick a date.

You've been married twice?

Please, please do not be
upset with me.

I forgot that
we did that.

I forgot that
Amy and I got married.

You forgot?

Yeah, it was null and void
from the time we said "I do."

We were underage.
It didn't count.

So, if we ever
got married,

that would be
your third wedding?

Yes, but only
my second marriage.

(SCOFFS)

Did you ever have
sex with Amy?

What? With Amy?
No. No, I did not.

Are you sure
you didn't just forget?

(SCOFFS)
I'm positive
I didn't forget.

Believe me, if I'd
had sex with Amy,
I'd remember...

And that did not come out
like I thought it would.

I never had sex with Amy.

So you've only had sex
with Adrian,
with your second wife?

Amy was not my first wife.

We were never
husband and wife.

Just answer the question.

I spent a summer
in Bologna.

(SCOFFS)

I guess the truth is,
I don't want to be married.

It was a mistake
to get married,

and I don't want to follow
my husband to Africa.

So, I'm gonna tell him that.

Well, you should,
if that's the way you feel,

you definitely
should just say it
and get it over with,

and go on with your life.
You deserve to be happy.

Is that Anne?
I just talked to her.

It's Kathleen.

Sorry. Hi, Kathleen.

Is that Ricky's mom?
Hi, Nora.

She says hi back.

I talked to Anne
and she's very happy
over there.

Uh, she's having
a wonderful time
and she's very happy.

Very happy.
So you should feel
free to be happy, too.

George?

Uh, yeah, sorry,
we got interrupted.

Um, where were we?

You were telling me
that I deserved
to be happy.

Well, you do.
Everyone deserves
to be happy.

Are you happy?
Me?

Hell, no. I'm miserable.
I'd like to do my
whole life all over again.

And given that's impossible?

I'd like to do
parts of it over again.

Yeah, me too.

Can I come in?
I'd like to talk to you.

I'm sorry,
I don't want you to come in.

What the hell did I do?

It's not what you
did tonight, it's just...

...what you did.

I mean, how did you
ever marry that woman?

Camille, I, I had been
so sad for so many years

that I never even
thought of having a life
outside of work and Ben.

And you know that.

And then along came Betty
and she was fun,

and I got a second chance
at having a life
and I took it.

Now it wasn't the life
I really wanted
as it turned out,

but Betty was good to me,

and Betty's probably
always gonna
want to be friends,

and I'm gonna be
friends with her.

I told her not to just
show up again at the house,

but I'm gonna be
friends with her.

And I imagine, eventually,
she'll make a lot of
new friends at school,

and she won't be
around as much, and...

I want to have children.
Just think about it.

Good night.

I love you, Leo.

(SIGHS)

+

It's just not the way things
were supposed to turn out.

It's not the way
you thought things
would turn out.

But a lot of things
are just beyond our control.

Yeah, I know. But...

I grieved the loss of
my baby so intensely that

I think I didn't have
any feelings left
when it came to losing Ben.

Ben is a good guy.

He's not the guy for me,

and I know
we shouldn't be married,

we don't want
to be married,

but I just felt like
such a loser when
I saw this piece of paper.

I know you, and once you
admit to feeling like that,

you'll pick yourself up
and go right back to being

the same confident
and practically
arrogant girl that you are.

The thing is,

it took me so long
to get confident

that I'm afraid
the more times
I pick myself up,

the more times I leave
a piece of me
on the ground.

Well, maybe
there are some pieces

that you want to
leave on the ground
and move on, you know?

Like Ben Boykewich.

I'll put that envelope
back outside...

(CLEARS THROAT)

You and me,
we'll move on
together, all right?

Don't go breaking my heart,
college boy.

Right back at you,
college girl.

Just a few more weeks,
you'll be in college, too.

Hmm.
All right?

Thanks for
following me home.

No problem.
And thanks for
walking me to the door.

Just doing what
a friend should do.

(CHUCKLES)
What?

You look kind of
funny. There's...
(CHUCKLES)

So do you.

You know, I think
I'm gonna like
just being friends.

That was fun,
making out in the car.

It's like a parked car
has its own set of rules.

You can't go too far
'cause of people
walking by on the sidewalk.

I wonder what
the rules are like in there.

Oh, yeah. In there
is off limits.

Oh.

Thanks for letting me
come over.

Good night, friend.

Good night.
(CHUCKLES)

I... I don't know what to do
with friends hands, I...

(SIGHS)

Where are you going?

Nowhere.
I just thought that
maybe you'd like to talk.

I think we've done
enough talking
for one night,

especially you.

I want to talk.

I want to talk to you
about why you
don't want to get married.

Didn't we just have fun?

(CHUCKLES)
Yes, we just had fun.

But I still can't believe
that you said that
in front of them,

that I won't marry you
until you stop trying
to have sex with me.

Sorry, I couldn't
help myself.

(LAUGHS) Yeah.

I don't want to push you,
but I want to get married.

Tell me what's
really going on.

You've been a little nuts
ever since
I gave you the ring.

What's going on is
I feel like an idiot

getting married
in high school.

I know we have a baby
and I want to get married,

I feel so lucky
that you asked me,

but, jeez, it's like,

I'm already a teen mom,

and if we get married
while I'm a teen,

then maybe we'll have
enough time left

to get divorced
while I'm still a teen.

What makes you think
we'll get divorced?

Look at my family,
I don't want to be
like my mom and my dad.

What about my mom and dad,
the birth ones,
couple of winners there, huh?

Everybody's parents
are screwed up.

So what?
We're not like
anyone else's parents.

We're only like
John's parents.

And we'll make sure
our little family
doesn't end up divorced.

If we get married,
there's always a chance
that we could get a divorce.

But if we never
get married...

I want to get married.

I do, too. (CHUCKLES)

I'm just scared.

(SOFTLY)
I love you, Amy.

I love you, too.

I don't think
this is it, either.

Stop putting
pressure on me!

Tom, I thought you knew
where you were going.

I know bus routes,
I don't know car routes.

Couldn't we just follow
the bus route
you take to the condo?

You should have
thought about that sooner.

(SIREN WAILING)

Hey, look,
that's a police officer.

We could get
directions from him.

Oh, God, I'm,
I'm going to get deported.

We, we could go
to prison, Tom.

I was in prison anyway.
A guest house, two kids.

What was I thinking!

License and
registration please.

No problem.

Son, this is
a fishing license.

Is it?

Give the officer
your driver's license.

I can't.
You have to.

That's the only
license I have.

I, I didn't know, I swear.
He said he had
a driver's license.

I say a lot of things.

Well, do yourself a favor
and don't say anything else

until you get
a lawyer, all right?

Are you... Aren't you
Doctor Bowman's son?

He was our
family pediatrician,
Doctor Bowman.

Yes, I am Doctor Bowman's son.
And so is he.

Hold on.

DYLAN:
I had such a nice time
tonight, thank you.

I had such a nice time, too,
but I don't want it to end.

It doesn't have to end.
I'm sure my parents
are in bed.

Sneak into my bedroom
and have your way with me.

Again?

BOTH: Gotcha!

(SIGHS)

Good night.
Good night.