02x03 - Rebel With A Cuz

Episode transcripts for the TV show "K.C. Undercover". Aired: January 2015 to February 2018.*
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A high-school math whiz trains to be an undercover spy.
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02x03 - Rebel With A Cuz

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on KC Undercover...

Hi. Is this the Cooper residence?

I'm actually here for Kira Cooper.

I think she might be my mother's sister.

Say she is my niece; if she's anything
like her mother, that girl is no good.

I don't want anyone from this family

to have any contact
whatsoever with that Abby girl.

I'm sorry, I didn't get to
properly introduce myself before.

I'm KC Cooper, and I'm your cousin.

Come on in.

I'm so glad we got to hang.

The thought of having a cousin
is just blowing my mind.

Now we can say, "What up, cuz?"

and not sound dumb.

No, it still sounds dumb.

Any chance you can sneak
away again some time soon?

What my mom doesn't know
won't hurt her, right?

Right. It's not like she's some super spy

who knows what you're doing every second.

(Forced laugh)

My mom, a spy? That is hysterical.

'Cause my mom is not a spy at all.

In any way.

She's a spy. What? I should go.

Judy, what are you doing here?

I have a better question.

What are you doing here?

I, uh... am sleepwalking, and you should
not wake me 'cause it is dangerous.

What's dangerous is going
against your mother's orders.

- Judy, please...
- Don't "Judy please" me.

I have to tell Agent Kira.

Why can't we just keep a
secret between us sisters?

The last time you kept a secret,

you got everyone kicked
out of the Organization.

Okay, can we please
stop living in the past?

Look, I'm begging you.

Can you please just keep this between us?

Well, when you put it like
that, all I can say is...

She went against your wishes, lied to
you, then threatened me if I told you.

I think that about covers everything.

Night, everyone.

Good work, Judy. Good work.

See, I was testing her
surveillance and reporting skills.

She passed with flying colors.

That's my girl.

I'll show myself to my room now.

♪ Oh, when danger comes for you ♪

♪ You know I'll stand beside you ♪

♪ 'Cause ain't nobody
keep things hustle cool ♪

♪ I'll always find a way,
a way out of the fire ♪

♪ Don't tell nobody, tell nobody ♪

♪ I'm not perfect ♪

♪ So many things I wanna tell you ♪

♪ But I, I, I, I keep it undercover ♪

♪ Livin' my life, no way to learn ♪

♪ Doin' my thing, gonna make it work ♪

♪ Know I'm the realest,
baby, I'm fearless ♪

♪ But I always got your back ♪

♪ Nobody can do it like I can ♪

♪ I gotta find out who I am ♪

♪ Ain't got to worry about me ♪

♪ It's all part of the plan ♪

I keep it undercover.

I keep it undercover.

All right, the laptop
we're assigned to retrieve

is on the th floor, so once we get there,

we gotta break through the window, grab it,

- and then rappel down. Sound good?
- Why ask me?

You're just gonna do
what you wanna do anyway.

Why do I have a feeling we're not
talking about the mission anymore?

I specifically told you not to
see Abby, and you did it anyway.

Really? We're gonna talk about this now?

This can't wait till we're not
dangling stories in the air

dodging pigeon poop?

You could be putting us all
in danger with that girl.

That girl is your niece.

So she says.

For someone so smart, you're
acting straight-up stupid.

For all we know, she
could be an enemy agent.

Really? Who worked her butt off to get
a scholarship to Howard University,

and in between her job at the bookstore,

and studying for midterms,
she's plotting against us?

You said it, I didn't.

You just didn't like her mother.

How would you like it if people judged
you based on who your sister was?

They do!

Do you know how many times
I've been interrogated

by the Organization because of my sister?

And they look at me a little sideways
because maybe, just maybe, I'm like her.

And I have to prove to them every day

that I am a different person than she was.

Do you have any idea what that's like?

I didn't realize. I'm sorry.

No, you didn't.

Now promise me you'll never see her again.

- Promise me!
- Fine. I promise.

Good.

Fifteenth floor. Okay, get in there.

Uh, Mom, I think we calculated wrong,
because that's the men's bathroom,

and it's ocupado.

Is this East Grand Street
or West Grand Street?

It's North Elm. Do we even have a
mission, or did you just bring me up here

to yell at me where no one could hear you?

Hold up.

I've gotta talk to you, robo-snitch.

Talk to the hand.

You can't be trusted.

Ratting out KC was wrong.

Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Whatever. I'm programmed to tell the truth.

It's a robot thing.

Well, let me tell you about a human thing.

It's called looking out for your own.

I've had plenty of opportunities
to rat KC out, but I didn't.

Like the time she was
two hours late for curfew.

Or when she cut school to go
to that Stephen Hawking lecture.

Or when I found out KC told Marisa we
were spies. I could've ratted her out,

but I didn't.

I kept my mouth shut, and
never told a single soul.

Until now.

Uh-oh.

Please don't tell anyone I said that.

Relax. Just because you can't keep
a secret doesn't mean I can't.

Oh, good.

For a price.

Uh-oh.

Hey, KC, we still on for tonight?

(Unintelligible)

She said yeah, she always
enjoys hanging out with you.

(Unintelligible)

And she will wear whatever
adorable outfit I pick out for her.

Oh, don't bother. I like when she wears the
red plaid shirt wrapped around her waist.

(Laughs)

Fine. You two are a perfect match.

You don't dress well, and he doesn't care.

So tell me about this cousin of yours.

Is she pretty, is she fashionable?

Can she introduce me to cute college boys?

Yes, yes, and, um, why don't you
work on getting into college

so you can meet those boys on your own?

Ugh, sounds like a lot of work.

Abby's a lot of fun.

She likes reading and math and science.

I gotta say, it's really
cool having a cousin.

It's too bad your mom won't
let you see her anymore.

(Unintelligible)

You're still gonna see her?!

Well, yeah. She's my cousin.
I can't just walk away.

I can't believe you're going to
deliberately disobey your mother.

My baby's all grown up.

Look, people think KC Cooper is
some kind of goody-two shoes.

I'm not. Okay?

I am a rebel. I am bad news.

I am a rule breaker, you know?

Hey!

That goes in the recycling bin.

Thank you.

Thank you. Look at that.

Half meat lover's, half
vegetarian lover's pizza.

They look pretty happy together.

I guess opposites really do attract.

Oh! Whoa!

Man, that's hot!

b*rned my mouth. That was embarrassing.

Not only am I bad at dating,

but apparently, I'm not
very good at eating either.

Hey, everyone's bad at dating
until you find the right person.

Besides, you're getting better.

Last time we went out, you sh*t
apple juice through your nose.

Yeah. The worst part about that
was, I did it to impress you.

- It didn't.
- I see that now.

I hope you don't mind, but I asked
my cousin to join us later.

You invited someone else?
You really are bad at dating.

Yeah, I know, it's a
little weird, but our moms

didn't really get along, so
we're not supposed to hang out.

Hey, no problem. It's cool.

Good, because my grandparents
are actually gonna come later.

- Seriously?
- I'm kidding. Kidding.

All right? Not that bad at dating.

Oh, hey, Abby, right here.

This is Darien.

Hi, Darien. Nice to...
Wait, are you on a date?

I didn't know you were on a date.

I wouldn't have come. I
should leave, shouldn't I?

Wait, you invited me.

Is this normal? I wouldn't know.

- I'm really bad at dating.
- This must be your cousin.

Hi, I'm Abby.

Wow, you guys look like each other.

You kinda act the same, too.

Both: We're not that much alike.

(Giggling)

Both: Okay, maybe we are.

You know, Ernie, I was thinking about
this whole "keeping a secret" thing.

(Hesitantly) Yeah?

Well, it sure would be a lot easier
if I had a nice bed to sleep on.

You want me to buy you a bed?

No, don't be silly.

I want your bed.

Okay, but I have to warn you.

I sometimes snore.

It won't bother me, because once that
lid's closed, that baby is soundproof.

I'm not sleeping in there.

You will if you want me to stay soundproof.

You're late.

I know, I know. I'm sorry.

You were with Abby, weren't you?

You know, Mom, I cannot lie to you,
so I'm just gonna tell you the truth.

I was with Darien.

Darien?

That really cute football
player from school?

Is he cute? I didn't notice.

Yes, he's cute.

And you were out with him?

You missed your curfew,
and I am so mad at you.

Really? It looks like you're smiling.

No. No, I am scowling.

This is me not happy with you.

My baby is dating a football player.

We're not.

We're not dating, okay?
We're just hanging out.

Oh, fine, but if you
pull this nonsense again,

then I am grounding you, missy.

So I'm not in trouble?

Come on, KC, you're a good kid.

I am a good kid... except for the
lying and the sneaking around

and the deliberately disobey...

Oh, no. I've become Marisa.

Morning, sunshine.

Did you sleep well?

You know who sleeps well in a box?

Dead people.

Well, look alive, because Agent
Kira has just given us a mission.

We have to retrieve an important flash
drive down a manhole on rd Street.

Crawling into a sewer, that's gross.

Why can't you do it?

It's called a manhole, not a robot hole.

And if I can learn a human thing

like keeping a secret,
you can learn a robot thing

like crawling through a
wet, dark, stinky sewer.

I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it!

I'm doing it. I'm doing it.

Lord help me, I'm doing it.

Judy: Just look for the flash drive.

- I think I found it.
- (Squeaking)

Not a flash drive, not a flash drive.

Hey, you might wanna keep your mouth shut.

Why?

That's why.

I wanna go back in the box,
I wanna go back in the box!

Hi, Kira.

What did you just call me?

Come on, we've known each other forever.

I'm not just your daughter's
friend, I'm your friend, too.

It just seems so silly to be so formal

and call you...

Hi, Mrs. Cooper.

Hello, Marisa.

So, where's KC?

I thought she was with you.

Busted!

She, um, is with Darien.

Yeah, she was afraid that you would think

that they are spending
too much time together,

and the relationship is going way too fast.

She's with Darien, that's fine.

He's a nice guy and I think
they make a cute couple.

I totally agree, Kira.

I mean, Mrs. Kira Cooper, adult
lady who I respectfully respect.

(Knocking on door)

Hey, Miss Cooper, is KC here?

Darien, I thought she was with you.

With me?

Oh, no, I totally forgot.

She's with Marisa, helping her study.

You know that girl can use
all the help she can get.

I will have you know
that I get A's in school,

when I sit next to smart people.

Oh, did I say she was with Marisa?

- What I meant to say...
- Don't bother.


I know exactly who she's with.

I'm telling you, I'm a way
bigger nerd than you are.

- I don't think so.
- Oh, really?

How many library cards do you have?

You really wanna play this game.

- Let's go.
- Okay.

Read 'em and weep.

I've got Will County, Cook
County, DuPage County,

and now, the Howard University library.

Too rich for my blood, or is it?

We have Arlington County,
Hamilton High, Montgomery County,

D.C. Metro area, and what is this?

The Library of Congress?

No way! How'd you get that?

I filled out an application.

In person.

On a Saturday night.

Who's the nerd now?

All hail, queen nerd!

Mmm, I'm gonna be late for class.

Oh, I'll walk you out.

Hey, I need to talk to you.

What you pulled yesterday put me
in a really uncomfortable position.

Worse than that time you insisted on
doing hot yoga in your skinny jeans?

I am serious. If I'm gonna
look bad in front of your mom,

it should be because
of something that I did.

This cousin of yours is a bad
influence on you, and that is my job.

Okay, Marisa, don't worry, okay.

You will always bring out the worst in me.

Now can you please tell me
what you're talking about?

I was at your house looking for you,

and your mom thought that you were with me.

But because I can
think fast on my feet...

You mean lie fast on your feet.

Whatever. I said that you were with Darien.

She believed me, and everything
was fine until he showed up.

So she knows I wasn't with you or Darien?

Then she knows that I was with Abby.

Why am I still alive?

I believe she is going with the classic

"guilting you into telling
her the truth" routine.

It is an oldie but a goodie.

But don't fall for it.
It is a game of chicken,

and you have to be the last chick standing.

Wow. No one knows more
about lying than you do.

And I mean that as a compliment.

Which is how I took it.

See ya later.

Hey, I need to talk to you.

Oh, Marisa just told me. I'm
really sorry about that, Darien.

Yeah, here's the thing.

If you wanna go behind your mom's back,

and hang out with your
cousin, that's on you.

I know. It's messed up. I
gotta be honest with her.

Good, because the last thing I need is
for her to hate the guy you're seeing.

(Bell rings)

Wait, seeing? We're seeing each other.

We're seeing each...
We're seeing each other!

We're seeing each other.

Not you and me.

I can see you but... (Stammering)

Darien and I, we're... I gotta go.

We analyzed the glass you brought in,

and we have the results from the DNA test.

And that Abby girl is lying.

We're not really related, right?

No, it's a match.

No doubt about it.

So then... she's really my niece?

Yes, she is.

I can't believe it.

I have a niece.

And she has a mother.

Where is Erica?

I told you, she's dead.

We never found a body.

You know more than you're telling.

What happened to your sister?

For the millionth time, I
don't know, Agent Johnson.

I've never known, Agent Johnson.

But if I find out, I'll
let you know, Agent Johnson.

Now, does the rest of
her story pan out or not?

All right, take it easy.

Chill out, Kira.

Everything you wanna know is in the file.

I can't believe what I'm reading.

I gotta get to KC.

KC, I need to talk to you.

Mom, me first. I've been going behind
your back and spending time with Abby.

- That's exactly what...
- Let me finish, okay?

I lied, and I'm really
sorry, but you're the one

who taught me that family comes first.

We're the only family that Abby has.

- That's what I'm trying...
- Just hear me out.

Abby is a great girl, okay?

She's already become important to me,
and I think if you gave her a chance,

she could become very
important to you, too.

Are you done?

Yes, I am.

Good, because I ran a DNA screening

and a background check,
and I know you thought

she was everything she said
she was, and you were right.

It's all true.

Abby is your cousin.

She did grow up in Evanston, she
did earn a scholarship to Howard,

and believe it or not,
she spent all of last night

applying for a card at
the Library of Congress.

What a nerd.

Hey.

That's my niece you're talking about.

And I know she's dying to meet you.

Hey, Ernie.

How'd you know it was me?

I could smell you coming.

But I took five showers.

Have you considered taking a bath?

Oh, no. Standing water
is no longer my friend.

Maybe you need some new friends,

like a bar of soap and
a good, sturdy sponge.

Okay, enough is enough.

I know you love having power over me,

because I let it slip about
Marisa knowing we're spies,

but Marisa can be trusted, and
trust is something you earn, Judy.

You don't just blackmail your way into it.

So fine, just tell Mom.

Please. If I was going to tell her,
I would've told her months ago.

You already knew?

So you did all this just to mess with me?

Yep. By the way, the mission in the sewer?

Made it up.

That sewer was gross and disgusting.

That was the plan.

Well, glad I got rid of
those nasty, stinky clothes.

Where'd you put 'em?

Sweet dreams.

Thank you so much for letting me come over.

It means a lot, Ms. Cooper.

Oh, please, call me Kira.

Or Aunt Kira. If you want.

You don't have to. You know what?

Whatever makes you comfortable.

Thanks, Aunt Kira.

Oh, come here.

This is such a beautiful moment.

Let's not forget, this would not have
been possible if it weren't for me.

Oh, the gift. Give her the gift.

Right. Okay, Abby.

We have a little present for you.

Thank you.

Actually, it's a family heirloom.

And since you're part of the family...

What a beautiful locket.

Open it.

Is this picture of...

I can't believe it.

I can't believe I'm looking at my mother.

We figured that since your mom's gone,
this would be the next best thing.

You don't know how many nights
I laid in bed as a little girl

just wondering... what was she like.

Do I look like her?

Do I have her smile?

And now, I'm actually
looking at my mother's face.

Abby...

she's not gone.

I'm sorry, what?

- She's alive.
- What?

She's alive, and I know where she is.

I'm sorry, you know where she is?

Mom, this whole time, you said that...

I know what I said.

But I didn't say what I know.

Sweetie, let me explain something.

Listen very closely.

I've secretly been in contact
with your mother, Abby.

She's alive and in hiding.

It's all falling into place.

After all this time, Kira Cooper's
gonna lead us straight to her sister.

Rob, your name's on TV.
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