11x03 - My f*cking Balls, My Cock, My Hole, or My Tits?

[bunniefuu]

It still feels weird
coming back here

after being gone for so long.

Hey, Mrs. Johnson!
Lawn's looking good!

But, you know, we got all
the tables and lights set up,

so hopefully,
we'll have everybody

that's been growing
vegetables for Bubs

switched over to growing clones
by the end of the day.

I mean, that's the plan, anyway.
Donnie:
Dirty f*cking whore slut!

Jesus, Donnie! You're
going to have a f*cking
heart att*ck, buddy!

f*ck you!

That guy's so f*cked.

So, you know. I really
don't know how I feel
about coming back here.

I mean, Bubbles and Ricky,
they're like my brothers

and I do miss
hanging out with them

but they seem
to be doing pretty good

without me being around,
so... you know, who knows?

But one thing I don't miss

is the constant f*cking
nightmares and bullshit

you've got to deal with
living in Sunnyvale.

Okay, Motel, no big deal.

Just sit there like that.
That's great.

What the hell?
Ricky:
That's it.

Julian:
Oh, for f*ck's sakes!

(Squeaking,
emergency brake clicking)

Ricky:
Here comes grampie.

Julian:
What in the f*ck
is going on here, boys?

Ricky:
Okay, just down on
the groundie-woundie

for Grampie-wampie.
All right?

Ricky, how the f*ck
did he get that?
No idea.

Well, you better hope
the f*cking safety's on.

Of course the
f*cking safety's on!
I'm not a idiot!

(Click)
Oh, f*ck, he just
turned it off.

I'm going to
have to go in.
Oh, Ricky!

Ricky, what
are you doing?
Ah, f*ck!

It's a habit.
I'm sorry.

How in the Christ did
f*cking Mo get a handgun?

He must have
found it in the car.
I don't know.

I've been looking for
that g*n for three years.
I love that g*n.

Oh, he's got your
favourite g*n, does he?

f*ck.
Okay, Mo, just point
it at the ground.

Just point it
at the ground.

Grampie's going to
come and get it, okay?

Bubbles:
Ricky, be careful.

That's it, just
pass it to Grampie.

That's a good boy.

(g*nsh*t)
(Screaming)

Bubbles:
Ricky! Ricky!

Oh, Jesus' f*cking horse-cock!

Mo just blew my
f*cking nuts off!
Bubbles:
Ricky!

Oh, my f*ck!
What?

(Anguished screech)
Ricky!

(Theme music)

(Crying)
Ricky: It's okay, Mo.
Grampie's okay.

It's okay, little buddy.
It's not your fault.

Grampie's just
f*cked in the head.

Yeah... yeah.
(Wailing)

It looks like
both your nuts are
still there Ricky,

but there's a big hole
in your duffel bag.

(Crying)

Here, sweetie.
What the f*ck happened?

Aw, is he okay?

(Crying)

I can't believe you let
Mo play with a handgun!

I didn't let him.
He must have
found it somewhere.

All I can say,
Ricky, is "wow".

Not now, Sarah, please.
Wow-w-w.

Let's go.

(Ricky panting)

Okay, Ricky.

Let me just have a look.

There is one little
tube thing hanging
out the side here...

Oh, f*ck me, Jesus!

Jesus Christ!
It's connected to
something, is it?

Yeah, my nut!

Oh, sorry, Ricky.

Here, it just...
doesn't look like

there's a whole lot of
damage to the inside.

Just get that, just...
Looks workable.

Julian:
Well, glue the f*cking
thing shut, man.

Glue me?

When you're six miles out
to sea and you cut yourself,

you just can't go
to the hospital.

Best thing you can
do, and a lot of people
don't know this,

but you can use Krazy Glue
to seal up the cut.
Works perfect.

Normally I wouldn't grab on
to Ricky's bare genitals
like that with my hands

but he's one of my best
friends and this is an
emergency situation.

That's what best friends do,
get right in there!

(Clicking tongue)

f*ck's sakes, that's the...

(Straining)
end of the glue right there

but you're f*cking sealed up
pretty tight there now, Ricky.

Ah, f*ck! How
does it look?

Well, if I'm being
completely honest,

it kind of looks like a...

fresh-out-of-the-oven heaping
portion of blueberry grunt

crushed into a roadmap
and covered in matted hair.
(Chuckling)

What the f*ck
does that mean?

Let's just say I'd...
cancel any boudoir
photography appointments

you have booked for
the next couple of weeks.
(Wheezing laughter)

Any what?
Okay, boys,
come on, let's go.

We've got a lot
of work to do.
Get up, Rick.

Just wait, a lot of work
to do? Julian, he needs
medical attention.

No, he doesn't.
He's fine, man. Look.

Ah, f*ck!
No more gooey sh*t.

We're all clean.
Let's go.
Julian!

That is some
of my best work

but I can't guarantee
that's going to hold.

He needs medical
attention.

We're f*cking going
for it right now.
Case closed.

Oh, f*ck.
All right.

Medical attention.
That's what we'll do.

Thanks, Julian.
All right,
no problem, bud.

Bubbles:
Try to keep your
legs together, Ricky.

One more time, boys.
Two parts of the green sh*t,

one part of the blue sh*t,
not two, Cory,

and half a part of
the f*cking pink sh*t.
Do you got it?

Yeah, totally, dude.
But what's a part?

Holy f*ck, you guys
are stupider than
f*cking June bugs.

The dumbest f*cking thing
on the planet, aren't you?

I know what a part is.
Don't worry, Ricky, man.

We got this.
Why are you guys
talking about parts?

What are you making?
f*ck off!

We're talking about
my parts, Randy,

which ones you might
want to tongue-lick.

My f*cking balls, my cock,
my hole or my tits.

Take your pick.

Haha, very funny, Ricky.

Why do you got chicken
fingers on your privates?

'Cause it feels f*cking
wonderful, Randy.

I'm pretending they're
your f*cking mother.

(Laughs)
Oh my God.

I want you out of
the park, Julian, now!

Make me.

Make you?
Yeah.

You want me out of the
park, f*cking make me.

Okay, I will.

All right, do it
then! Make me!

What are you? Scared?

'Fraidy-cat,
'fraidy-cat!

You want me to make you
get out of the park?

Yes, I do. Make me.

All right,
you asked for it.

Ah! Ah! Aaah! Ahh!

Julian! Julian!

Let go, Julian!
It hurts. Julian!

Julian!

Uh!
You're out of
your league, Randy.

Now f*ck off!

That frigging
hurt, Julian!

Ricky:
f*cking p*ssy!

You got honker
stomped, Randy!
f*cking honker stomped.

(Panting)
Take it easy, man.

Keep everything
cinched together, Ricky.
(Squirrel chirping)

You think this is
f*cking funny, do you,
you little fucker!

Ricky! Ricky...
Ahh-ahh-ah! f*ck!

Here, sh**t him, Bubs!
sh**t him!

I'm not sh**ting
a squirrel.

Bubs, give him a hand.
This thing is f*cked!

Why don't you get a
f*cking normal-person-Jeep?

This is normal
f*cking Jeep.

Yeah, a normal person
Jeep if you're G.I. Joe.

f*ck's sakes!

♪ G.I. Jo-o-oe ♪

Randy:
Officer Randy, continuing
my investigation.

I'm now located
at Elm Lake Road.

Cory:
Yo, that was the best
explaining I ever heard, dude.

Jacob:
Yeah, I really got into
the zone there, didn't I?

Yeah man, talking
about the colours

and the parts right
and sh*t, man.
That was awesome!

Man, you should do this one.
I think you can do it.

All right.

Marguerite:
Yeah?

What?
Hey, Marguerite.
Ricky wants us to come by

and go over the new
set-up with you.
Is that cool?

Oh, what? I can't be
bothered with that
bullshit right now!

My f*cking shows are on.

Well, it's not
going to take long

and Ricky will be really
pissed if we don't
do this now. Please!

Oh, Jesus Christ!
All right.

Come on in,
you little pissants!

You can show me
all that when the
commercials are on.

Suspects have entered
the residence of
Marguerite Murphy,

a definite indicator of the
suspicious criminal activity

taking place in
Sunnyvale trailer park.

Bubbles:
See if you can
wrap them, Ricky.

You want surface area.
Ricky:
Ahh.. ahhh.

Julian:
Okay, I'm going to go
inside and set sh*t up.

You guys wait here.
Ricky:
Right on, Julian.

What? Where the
f*ck are we?
Sam Losco's.

Losco's? Are you
f*cking crazy?

There's no way that
fuckhead's going anywhere
near my nuts, Julian!

You said we were
going to the hospital.

No, I said we were going
to get medical attention.

That's what the
f*ck we're doing.

Julian, he needs to see
a f*cking real doctor,

not a slobbering Neanderthal
caveman veterinarian.

Okay, we're going to
stroll into the hospital
and say, "Hey, everybody!

Ricky's grandson got a
hold of a f*cking handgun

and blew his nuts off."
Is that the plan?

Oh, boys, everything's
going numb.

My f*cking cock, my balls,
my jungle bridge,

even my ass.
Jungle bridge?

What the f*ck is your
jungle bridge, Ricky?

You know, the place where
your vagin-er would be
if you f*cking had one.

But it's like a bridge
from your ass to your balls,

and it's jungle-y...
a f*cking jungle bridge!

No, Ricky, the technical term
for that area is perineum.

But it's also
commonly referred to

as your taint,
your gooch or your choda.

I don't give a f*ck
what the medical term is!

Mine needs to see a doctor
at the f*cking hospital!

A real doctor's not a
f*cking option, Ricky!

Okay, fine.
Fine, Julian.

So we just let our
best friend suffer
a slow painful death

bleeding out through
a Krazy Glued g*nsh*t
hole in his nutsack

and then we just go about
our business like nothing
f*cking happened.

(Clicking)
Is that the plan, then?

We're talking
about my nuts. My nuts!

Okay! Not some
unimportant
part of my body

like an arm
or a leg or head!

I want to go to the
f*cking hospital!

Okay. You guys win.

We're going to go to
the f*cking hospital.

Because you guys always
know what's best, huh?

Yes! Yes, we do.

Now, Ricky, get those
frozen chicken fingers

under your balls
for support.

Can you cradle them, Bubs?

Cradle what? Your balls
or the chicken fingers?

Both, if you're okay
with that. Oh, my god.

How's that?
That's f*cking perfect.
Thanks, buddy.

Bubbles:
Come on, Ricky.
(Car door shuts)

Careful.

Careful.
Ricky:
Okay...

Julian:
Easy.
Ahh, f*ck!

Jesus!

These f*cking
things are thawed.

Thanks for doing this,
Julian, man. You're
a good f*cking friend.

Hey, man, you've got to
do what you've got to do.

This is a f*cking
serious situation...

Hey, easy.

All right, boys.
We've got to get
our story together

before we go in there.
All right?
Okay.

You were lighting
fireworks off, one went
down your pants...

Yeah.
...b*rned a b*llet-sized
hole right through your bag.

There's no other
damages, no burn marks,
no nothing, right?

Perfect.
Okay, let's do this.
Let's give it a sh*t.

If we end up in jail,
at least we tried, right?

What are you talking
about jail for?

You said this could work.

Yeah, it could work
but, then again,

it could not
work, obviously,
and if that happens,

the cops are going to
be involved. Let's go.

Well, can we f*cking
worry about that when
it happens, at least?

You're right.
It's not a big deal.

You know. They start
investigating this thing.

Once they find out
it's a b*llet wound,

and, you know, they'll
trace it back to Mo.

You'll lose
him forever,

but that's chance we've
got to take, right?

Yeah, I see what
you're doing here, bud.
What? Come on.

Let's go.
Guess what?

Reverse psychology
does not work on me.

I'm not using reverse
psychology, man.

I'm just making sure
we're on the same
f*cking page here.

Yeah, by trying to use
reverse psychology.

It goes right
off me, Julian.
Bu... Bu...

I would never
f*cking use reverse
psychology on you, man.

You're too smart
for that sh*t.

I'm just making sure that,

you know, if you do
lose Mo forever,

it was our decision
together as a team.

Okay?
Jesus f*cking Christ...
All right!

We've got to think about
this maybe one more time!

I'm here for you.
That's all I'm saying.

I'll go in, I'll do
whatever you want.

f*ck's sakes.
We can't go in there!

Come on, back to
the f*cking truck.

What are we going
to do with my balls?

I've got a plan.

Oh! You've got
a plan. See?

Now it all comes
out in the open.

What?
This is the
plan all along.

You were never planning
on going in there.
What... the f*ck?

Are you kidding me?
I was planning on
going in there!

Then you guys started acting
like dicks, so I came up
with a f*cking plan!

Just like that,
Julian's f*cking plan.

Yeah, well, at least
I've got a f*cking plan.

Here, easy man, easy,
easy, easy, easy...

Ah, ah, f*ck!
Something just tore!
Oh, Jesus.

Oh, f*ck! It feels like
it's wide open again.

I think something's
hanging out.

Oh, my god!
For f*ck's sakes, Ricky.

Oh f*ck!
All right, we're going
to move on to Plan C.

Get him in there.
Let's go.
Oh, you've got a Plan C too?

Of course I've
got a f*cking plan!

Do you have a
f*cking plan?
B... Plan B, Plan C.

You've probably got
a f*cking D, E and F
and an L, M, N, O, P.

Just get in the
f*cking Jeep.

(Dramatic music
on television)

(Sigh)
Ohh...

So, yeah...
Like we were
saying, Marguerite,

um, we've got to take
two parts of the first...

Oh, for Christ's sake,

I already got that
the first time
you explained it,

you noodle-head.

And it's not exactly
f*cking rocket science.

Well, it's kind of
like rocket science.

Oh, get out.
Come on, get out.

No! You can't make us...
We can't leave the
guy in the coma,

there's a guy in a coma.
Please, I just want...
Go on, get out.

No!
Get on, get,
the two of you! Get!

Cory:
(Sniffling)

Man, are you okay, dude?
Yeah, man.

It's just the guy in
a coma and everything.

Like, I feel so bad.

I'm pretty sure that
wasn't real, Cory.

Come on, man,
we're k*lling this!

Only more places to go.

Yeah, man.
Let's do this.

Only more what, guys?
What are you guys up to?

We're not up to
anything, dude.

Oh, come on, you must
have been talking
about something.

I'm just curious.
Not for any reason.

Yeah, right, man.
I know what you're doing.

You're acting all nice
to get information
out of us or sh*t.

But we ain't doin'
that, 'cause Ricky
would be pissed.

Ricky would be pissed?
What would Ricky
be pissed about?

We can't tell
you that, Randy.
Seriously.

If we told you what
Ricky was going
to be pissed about,

then Julian would be
way madder than Ricky.

Oh, so Julian's
involved too.

What are Ricky and
Julian doing together?

Dude! We told you.
We're not saying sh*t!

Peace!

You already told
me everything
I needed to know.

What'd we tell him?
Oh, man, I don't know.

Oh, man, well, you don't
know and I don't know,
then he don't know.

Guy's f*cked.

Hold still, Ricky,
for f*ck's sakes.

This is the extra
strength stuff.

You've got to get it
right in the right spot.

Just hurry the f*ck up.
(Grunt)
Jesus Christ!

The f*cking thing went
right in his mouth!
Shh-h-h!

It did not, Ricky!

It just got me on the cheek.

I know what a mouth
feels like, Bubs.

(Sobbing)
It didn't go in there.

Just hurry up!
Well, stop shoving me!

This needs to be accurate.

Okay, here, one
dab right there.

Okay, pinch it shut.
Ahh!

You got it?
Yeah.

(Phone rings)
Don't get...
Jesus Christ!

Keep it off your
leg, Ricky.

Hello, Ricky's
NHL ball hockey camp.
Can I help you?

Yeah, starts Monday.

As far as I know,
they're still
f*cking coming.

I left them
lots of messages.

You know what? If you
want the f*cking spot,
bring your kid money.

If you don't, I don't
give a f*ck. Paul's in
your court. f*ck off.

It's "ball", Ricky.
Man:
Holy f*ck, that guy's naked...

Who gives a f*ck if the
cock-sucking NHL d*ck-dumbs
f*cking show up or not?

f*cking Jesus!
Man :
Hey, excuse me, excuse me.

Please keep the swearing
down in the store, folks.

Oh, sorry about that.
Yeah, I can keep it down.

Can you keep the f*ck
off and up, though?
Like, way up.

Hey... What the hell
are you guys even doing?

You're opening stuff?
Yeah, I did that.

My friend's trying
to glue my bag shut,

thanks to you f*cking
hilli-billy mule whores.

Wha...what?
Who the f*ck put this
thing here right now?

I did.
Yeah? Well, maybe next time

you won't want to put
a f*cking claw rake
at bag height. See that?

See the f*cking
hole right in my nut
chamber right there?

Oh, Jesus! I... Look,
I'm... very sorry...
Yeah, you should be.

Sir, do you want
me to call, like,
an ambulance or...

No, I don't want you to
call a f*cking ambulance.

If you call ambulance, you'd
probably get f*cking charged,
maybe go bankrupt.

Won't be able to buy my
sh*t here anymore, okay?

Don't want that to happen.
I'm a nice guy.

So, instead,
maybe I could...

yeah, I could maybe
take one of these
no-cord drills here,

one of these suck-her-up
vacs, paper towlies...
Um...

Pretend like this never
happened. Okay, bud?
Sh... yeah...

You know what? I'll take
one of those for Coolnow.

Coolnow would like that.
(Dog toy squeaking)

Yeah, okay, uh,
I think that is, um...
more than, uh, fair.

You're f*cking right it's more
than fair, it's better than
a lawsuit, right?

Yes. So... uh...
It's not your fault.
You were born a little dumb.

It's okay. See you
next time, bud.

Thanks for being
so understanding.

(Chanting)
Ohm-m-m-m...

(Engine whirring,
metallic rattling)

(Chanting loudly)

(Engine gets louder)

(Engine shuts off)

Hey, Barb, can I talk
to you for a minute?

You know what, Randy?
It would be great

if you could get
something a little quieter.

That is so noisy.

Oh, the electric ones
are really expensive,

and this one's more
like a cop car.

I need the practice.

Can I talk to
you about Julian?

What about Julian?

I think you should let him
move back into Sunnyvale.

Absolutely not.

Sunnyvale has been just
fine without Julian.

But he's... he's doing
something with Ricky.

I don't care, Randy.

That is not my problem.

Well, I think it is.

They're going to do
whatever it is that
they're doing anyway.

And if Julian was here,

it would be a lot
easier to make a case
with the cops.

I'm confident I could
take them down, Barb.

I'm training to be
a police officer

and this would
go a long way

to getting me into
the police academy.

No, Randy!

You know, you are beginning
to sound exactly like...

like Jim used to.
And if you're not careful,

Julian will drive
you totally crazy.

(Puffing)

Well, maybe I do sound a
little bit like Mr. Lahey.

But there's one
big difference:

I'm not drunk.

I'm confident
I could do this.

And I could do it while
you're away in Tibet.

Tibet? Oh, for God's sake,
I'm not going to Tibet, Randy.

I'm going to Cape Breton
for a Tibetan retreat.

Well, wherever it is,

let him move in
while you're away

and I promise I'll
take him down for good.

(Sigh)
Fine.

Great!

Thanks, Barb.

(Engine ignition)
(Chanting)
Ohm-m-m-m...

(Loud bang)
(Chanting loudly)

Do, do, do, do.

Hey, I'm Dennis
the Tennis Dog.
(Squeaking)

How are your nuts
feeling, Ricky?
Want me to lick them?

(Squeaking)
f*ck off, Bubs.
That doesn't help.

Oh, come on.
I'll just give your
jungle bridge a lick.

Coolnow's going
to love this thing.
(Squeak)

What's up with
you, man? I thought
you didn't like dogs.

You f*cking love him.
Do not.

Do so.
Do not. I'm just saying
he's going to like the toy.

I only got it to distract
him from my kitties.

I don't love him.
(Squeak)

Okay, boys.
You guys ready?
(g*n clicking)

What the f*ck have you
got your g*n out for?

Because it's Sam Losco.

You guys almost
k*lled him, remember?

You know he's not going
to agree to do this sh*t.

(Sigh)

Are we ready?
Yes.

All right, let's go.

Jesus Murphy,
look at this place.

Just take it easy, Ricky.
Hey, buddy, is Sam around?

It's me, Julian.
What?

Sam?

Oh, my f*ck, what
happened to your face?

I did a little
work on myself.

I look years
younger, don't I?

No, you look
times more f*cked.

You look kind of
like a half-chewed
caramel, Sam. No offense.

You guys are just
f*cking jealous!

Besides, now,
when I jerk off,

I can actually f*cking
suck on my own titties.

Oh, that's... wonderful.

Listen, Sam.
f*cking emergency here.

I got sh*t in the nuts,
man. You've got to
f*cking help me, please.

Nope. I do Botox,
Ricky, not bag-tox.

Sam, I did a bunch of
glue-work to it already,

it would be a
simple stitch job.
I said no.

Every time you
guys come around,
my life goes to sh*t!

The answer is no!

The answer's yes.
f*ck!

Fix his f*cking bag, Sam!

f*ck, calm down, Julian.

Put the f*cking g*n down.

Come on, Ricky.
Come in the back.

I'll f*cking take
a look at it anyway.

Oh, thanks, Sam.

Keep hobbling
there, Ricky.

It's not going to be
that big of a deal,
Sam, I'm telling you.

Like, I did a lot
of the glue-work

and it's all lined up,

so it's really
just some stitches.
(Squeaking)

Drop your drawers
and jump on the gurney here.

Let me take a look.
I'll see what I can do.

Careful,
Ricky, careful.

Yeah, you definitely
sh*t yourself in the bag.

I haven't seen one
of these in... years.
(Laughing)

I think if I were
to just uhh...

All right, m*therf*ckers!
Ah f*ck!
What are you doing?

Get the f*ck out of here
or I'm going to cut
his f*cking cock off!

Put down the
f*cking Kn*fe, Sam!

No! You put down
the f*cking g*n

or this thing's
coming off, I swear
to f*cking God!

Julian...
Ricky: Julian. Put the
g*n down, man.

Sam, please, come on.
Don't cut my cock off.

Please, man.
We can work this out.

Listen, I've got actually
a f*cking brand new...

uh, one of those
sucker vacs

and a non-corded...
one of the drills.

It's in his f*cking
Jeep out there.
You can have them.

Just don't cut
off my cock.

You've got a Jeep now?
What year?

Bubbles:
Careful, Sam.

Ricky:
Careful, Sam. Careful with
that f*cking door, man.

Don't let that Kn*fe slip.

Sam:
I'm not going to slip.

Okay, okay. All right.
Easy.

Take it easy.
Wow! You must get a lot
of p*ssy with that rig.

Do you?
Yeah, I actually...

I do pretty f*cking good.
Don't like to brag but...

I'm not talking
to you, dumbass!

I'm talking
about the Jeep.

Hand over the keys
there, Lara Croft.

You're not getting
my Jeep, assh*le.

Yeah?
(Wincing) Okay, now
he's cutting into the shaft!

Julian, come on, man! We can
get you another Jeep, you
can't get me another cock!

Either the Jeep
is staying or the
cock is staying.

You f*cking decide.
Sam, don't do it.

Come on, Julian,
there's no choice
to make here!

(Keys jingling)

All right.
Stitch him up!

You stay out here.
Get the f*cking door.
Thanks, Julian.

f*ck...
Okay, release the cock.

Is there any paperwork
with that f*cking thing?

No.
Perfect.
(Kiss)

You f*cking owe
me one, Ricky!

f*ck's sakes!

It's been a weird day.

Bubbles:
How's the old duffel
bag now, Ricky?

Still pretty f*cking sore,
but it's better than it was.

I think he did a
pretty good job.

You think he was
serious when
he said I can't b*at off

or have sex for
two weeks, though?
Yes, he was serious.

Think about it.
You could jerk-tear it.

It's not going to be
easy, I tell you that.

You know how f*cking
horny I am, boys.
Oh, I know.

What the hell's going
on over there now?

(Laughter)
Bubbles:
Oh, looks like...

people hanging out,
getting along,
acting like a family.

That's what we
should be doing.

Come on, Julian,
just move back to the
park already, please.

Move back. I miss
living with my family too.
Look man, look, look...

I'd probably consider
moving back if it
was even an option

but it's impossible
anyway, so just get it
out of your head, man.

Actually, Julian,
that's not true.
Jesus f*ck!

You scared the nuts off me.
Almost literally-ly!
What?

Randy, you just
appear like a f*cking
gas now, do you?

What are you talking
about, it's not... true?

Well, out of the
goodness of my own heart

I've pulled some
strings with Barb,

and she said you
could move back in,
if you want to.

Ricky:
Are you serious?
What?

Oh, my God, Julian, you can
move back to the park now!
That's awesome!

(Cackling)
Right on, boys.

Bubs, I've got to take
a drink. Let go of me.

Bubs, let go of me.
I've got to take a drink.

Not lettin' go!
Bubs, please!

Hugging my buddy!
(Cooing)

Ricky:
You going to do it?

I'll think about it.

What do you mean,
you're not going to help
me to take them down?

It's not worth it, Randy.

You're going to lose, bud.

I don't think so,
Mr. Lahey.

I can pretty much guarantee
they're growing dope

or something just as bad.

You have a hunch,
is that what you're saying?

Yeah, a frigging
good hunch.

Randy, do you know
what a hunch is worth

when you're dealing
with people like Ricky

and the Sunnyvale
Police Department?

Jack-sh*t!

I'm taking them down,
with or without
you, Mr. Lahey.

Randy, I'm telling you,

leave Ricky and
his family alone.

There's a lot more at play
here than you could ever know.

Wow. If I didn't
know any better,

I'd say you had
a crush on Ricky.
(Chuckles)

I don't have a crush
on Ricky, Randy.

Don't be ridiculous.

What is it then?

What is it?

Randy, Ricky...

Ricky and his family

are deserving of
a second chance.

What the frig,
Mr. Lahey?

(Inhaling)
sh*t of veggies, Bubs?

Ricky...
(Sighs)

It's not a sh*t of
veggies. You're still
just smoking dope.

No, but you get all the
nutriments of the veggies
in the f*cking smoke.

(Whispering)
Oh my God.
Okay.

So explain to me exactly
what they f*cking
told you so I'm sure.

Oh, well, okay.

Well, you're
supposed to mix

two parts of this sh*t,
Yeah.

with one part of this

and a half-part of this
g*dd*mn stuff, ain't we?

That's right,
isn't it?

That's exactly
right, actually.

Well, boys. I'm
f*cking impressed!

Pfft... 'cause
we k*lled it.

Yeah, man, kicked
ass and k*lled it.

f*ck man, we totally
kicked ass today.

We explained the whole
process to everybody

and we shut Randy
down when he started
asking us questions.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa...

What do you mean,
Randy was asking
you questions?

Well, he just popped
up out of nowhere

and started asking
weird questions.

So, you know, we...
Oh, f*ck.

And what did you say?

I don't know.
"I don't know."

Just, well,
I said... stuff.

Stuff...
Stuff, see,
stuff means stuff.

Stuff. Things
were said. Stuff.

What the f*ck
did you say, boys?

We just made it really
clear to him that we
couldn't tell him anything

or else Ricky was
going to be pissed.
(Coughing)

You f*cking told him I
was going to be pissed?

Yeah!
Well, that was f*cking
brilliant, boys!

Oh, thank you, man.

No, he's being
sarcastic, Cory.

What the f*ck
is in your brain

you can't pick
up on sarcasm.

This is f*cked,
Julian. This is f*cked.

Randy's going to know
something's going on now.

Randy already knows
something's going on, man.

Why do you think he let
me back into the park?

Out of the goodness
of his f*cking heart?

That...
did seem fishy.

No, he knows
something's up.

And that's why I've
got to move back in.

What? You're moving
back into the park
officially?

It's official?
I'm moving back.

(Giggling)
Right on, boys.

I've got to keep
my eye on him

while he's keeping
his eyes on us.

Oh, I get it.

The old "Keep your
friends close but get
your enemies' toaster".

We've got to get
Randy's f*cking toaster.

Ohhh, Ricky...

What?

Did I f*ck that up?

Yeah, you
really did, bud.

It's all right.

(Theme music)

(Seabirds squawking)

Fish:
f*ck! f*ck! f*ck off! f*ck!...

f*ck off! Jesus Christ!

(Whisper)
f*ck.

(Light clicks off)
f*ck off.