02x02 - Business Award

[bunniefuu]

- What are you doing?
- Bagging.

Okay, Mr. Kim,
if you don't care about me...

I don't.

At least care about the sea turtles.

Did you not read
the pamphlet I gave you?

No. I threw in garbage.

First of all, that should have
gone in the recycling,

and more importantly,

sea turtles are dying
because of your plastic bags.

- My bag?
- Yeah, your bag, their bags,

I am boycotting all plastic bags.

Hmm. So, how you carry?

I will be like the majestic
sea turtle and adapt.

Did you know that

plastic bags k*ll
more sea turtles than sharks?

You mean, uh, bag k*ll shark,
or shark k*ll turtle?

Either way, it is a travesty,
and it needs to be stopped.

Oh, you right. I help.

Take bread, put in hand. I insist.

Turtle very important. Like this.

- Yeah. Yeah.
- Okay.

Take a banana and put it in the pocket.

- All right.
- It's tight...

- Okay.
- Yeah. Okay.

You can have a little bit more
inside here,

use other hand, too.

Here.

And a can under chin... (CHUCKLES)

Okay. That's unflattering.

Again you saving the sea turtle?

- You understand me.
- I get door.

Okay, well, always a nice casual visit.

- Okay, see you.
- Bye-bye.

- He not gonna make it home.
- Not even close.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Thanks.

There he is, Mr. Fitness.
Making us all look bad.

Hey, I'd drive a car
if you paid me more.

And take all this away from you?

The fresh air, the exercise, the...

- (SIGHS)
- Joie de vivre. (CHUCKLES)

And it's fast.

My average speed on the trip in was...

Nine hundred kilometres an hour.

Ooh! That's my boy.

I think that's just the
number of calories I b*rned.

(CHUCKLES)

- No, I think it's just : .
- Still, you're on time.

I used to bike all the time back home,

zipping through the streets. (CHUCKLES)

"There goes the town bike," they'd say.

Not in that way.

The bike was actually shared
by everyone in the town.

And, boy, did I get around.
Again, not in that way.

You should totally get one.
We could be bike buddies.

I don't know,

there's a whole big city bike
culture I don't understand.

The gears, the bells,
the helmet, it's a lot.

It's a bike.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Hi, Umma. Hi, Appa.

Hi, Janet. Hi, Janet's dirty laundry.

Hi, Janet.

Yah, something wrong
with you own washing machine?

No, I just miss spending time
with you guys.

Oh, miss spending time
with the free hydro,

free detergent, the free food.

Appa, don't be mean.

Yeah, Appa. That's not
award-winning behaviour.

I'd expect more from

the Moss Park
Business Person of the Year.

- What, you hear something?
- No.

Janet.

I just have a good feeling about it.

Don't jinx.

They announce tomorrow.
I have good feeling, too.

Just stop talking, hmm?

I never win,
whole thing is just stupid.

Then why can't we talk about it?

No more talking until tomorrow.

In general, or about the award?

- Just stop.
- Janet, we go upstairs now.

Make space on the Don't Touch Wall

for, you know, something.

- Like an award?
- I can still hear you.

(BICYCLE BELL RINGS)

I got a surprise for you.

No... What is that?

A buddy of mine fixes up old bikes.

I got it for practically nothing.

I have to pay you something for it.

Oh, forget it. It was like bucks.

Forty with the new rims, but...

- So, $ ?
- Well, it was $ total,

- but it's a gift so, $ . $ .
- (BICYCLE BELL RINGS)

(CHUCKLES) I love it.

Oh, I almost forgot.

The helmet was $ .

But seriously, don't worry about it.

Uh, are these eggs free-range?

(SIGHS) Not free. Price is on the top.

No, like, are the chickens
kept in cages?

(SIGHS) We don't have chicken here.

Do the farmers keep
the chickens inside cages?

Oh, good question.
You go to farm, you find out.

Uh, these are local.
Very fresh. You will like.

Oh, okay, thanks.

- Oh, Mr. Chin, good morning.
- It certainly is.

And as Secretary of the Moss
Park Business Association,

I am happy to say someone here

is about to have
a very rewarding morning.

(CHUCKLES) It's nothing.
I just try to work hard.

- Congratulations, Mr. Kim.
- Oh, thank you...

Oh, no, the winner
isn't Mr. Kim, it's Mrs. Kim.

What?

- No.
- Oh, yes.

You both received votes,

but Mrs. Kim blew away
all the competition.

Congratulations, Mrs. Kim.

Well, it must be some mistake.

No mistake.

And believe me,
I asked for several recounts.

(SIGHS)

Congratulations on you award.

- (MR. CHIN CHUCKLES)
- Our award.

She's right, you should both
be very proud.

But mostly Mrs. Kim.

(UMMA SIGHS)

You using the washing machine?
I wanna do a load.

No, I did mine at my parents'.

Sweet.

- What?
- Your load is one shirt?

Yeah. That's all that's dirty.

Then wait until other things are dirty.

But I wanna wear that shirt.

Is this the first time
you've done this?

Yes.

This is why our hydro bill is so crazy.

But this way, I don't risk

ruining my shirt with other colours.

Your shirts are all black.

Because I carefully wash them.

Individually.

Fine!

- Happy?
- Not really.

GERALD: Hmm.

My wallet is in there.

Oh, God...

Life in the bike lane, am I right?

Hey, you are looking
a lot better today.

I think you're really
getting the hang of it.

Oh, yeah. (CHUCKLES)

I mean, a lot of people yell
when you ride on the sidewalk.

And I might have something
called saddle rash,

but I think I'm hitting
my stride. And just loving it.

Yeah, it really gets the heart pumpin'.

(CHUCKLING) Is that what that is?

Usually, I bring a fresh shirt
to change into.

Oh, I tried that, but it looks like

the sweat went
right through the backpack.

- (PANTS)
- Whoa.

It's weird because I know the AC is on,

but I feel like I'm getting hotter.

It's a cool-down period,
you'll get used to it.

It's so great, right?

So great. (CHUCKLES)

(CHUCKLES)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

- JANET: Hey.
- Hey.

So, I was thinking about
our conversation last night,

and maybe, we just need to be
more considerate?

Yeah, I totally agree.

Which is why I'm doing all my laundry

in cold water from now on.

Great.

Yeah, because our hydro bill
is so crazy.

- I know, right?
- Yeah.

And I know how you love

to take those really long, hot baths.

And then shower,
like, right afterwards.

To wash off the bubbles.

And that's no problem.

But you know what would be
super considerate?

Is if you could clean your
hair from the drain

and the wall when you're done?

Yeah, of course.

That would be awesome. Thank you.

You know what else would be,
like, so considerate?

Mmm?

If after shaving,
you could clean the sink

and the floor, for some reason.

- Done.
- Hmm.

And before I forget,

did you make scrambled eggs recently?

Not today.

Oh, no, they're definitely
a few days old.

I'm soaking the pan, okay?

Okay, well, while the pan soaks,

maybe you can clean up
your used tea bags

from our coffee table,

and, I don't know, everywhere.

I'm reusing them.

It's called being good
to the environment.

Unlike your one shirt
k*lling-the-planet wash!

My pants and wallet were in there, too!

Again, they shut you out.

What is this, years in a row, now?

Oh, I'm not counting.

Who won this year?
Oh, let me guess, a woman.

Why you say that?

Oh, please.

Business association,
so politically correct.

They don't give awards to
people who deserve them,

- just the flavor of the month.
- What flavor?

It's all optics, to gain flavor
with the city. It's a racket!

Actual, Mrs. Kim
is win award this year.

Well, in that case, they've
made an admirable choice.

Besides, we've all won this award.

It's good for a woman to win it, right?

I never win.

Not recently, but you must have...

Never, never?

Oh.

MRS. MEHTA:
You're a celebrity, Mrs. Kim.

Oh, that's a good price on cauliflower.

Yeah. It's just community paper.

You can keep, I have lots.

So proud of you.

Though Mr. Kim doesn't look too happy.

I think he think
he is going to win this year.

Don't let his disappointment

take away from your achievement.

This store wouldn't be
half the success it is

without you.

- Yeah, you right.
- (CHUCKLES)

Well, I must be going.
Where's my husband?

- He left.
- Of course he did.

"Marry a Mehta," they said.
"He'll take care of you."

I had servants in India.

Now, I live with a man

who microwaves cheese on toast.

Hey, everything okay?

I'm just so mad right now.

What's wrong with people in this city?

- What happened?
- (SIGHS) My bike was stolen.

Oh.

That sucks.

And I so looked forward
to that morning ride.

I mean, yes, sometimes,
it was a challenge,

but, boy, did I love that challenge.

And somebody stole that from me.

(SHANNON SIGHS)

We could try getting you a new one.

I mean, probably
not for the same price...

I'm just too mad to even
think about it right now.

I get it, I'm sorry.

Hey, you look nice today.

- Not now, Terence!
- Okay.

- That was a bit harsh.
- It's a tough city.

Excuse me, do you have Apple Pay?

- Appa pay?
- Yes.

Why would I pay?

Oh, no, I'll pay, but with Apple Pay.

We take cash and debit over $ .

- Great, thank you.
- (SIGHS)

(CASH REGISTER BEEPING)

Oh...

- Congratulations.
- Thank you very much.

Yeah. Store wouldn't be "half
as successful" without her.

Of course it would be. Exactly half.

We both work hard, together.

But Mrs. Kim work so much harder.

I only open store,
close store, go to wholesale,

but Mrs. Kim, she rearrange
cookie on the shelf,

and that make all difference.

I do more than that.

I get involve in community,
work with other store.

I am kind to customer, not like you.

Maybe that's why I win.

Only reason you win
is because you is woman.

I'm going to go.

So, thank you both, equally.

When I say you is a woman...

You don't even care about the award.

Why would you?

Award is so stupid,

only dumb woman like me can win!

I not say you is dumb.

You care about award so much.

Here, you take. Take! Take!

- You win, you keep.
- No, no. I don't deserve.

- You take it.
- No, no.

- Take!
- No!

Oh, fine. Nobody wants!

Yeobo! Yeobo!

My card...

(CLICKS TONGUE) Appa pay.

See, a weekday picnic is possible.

All it takes is a little
Sunday night meal prep.

Dude, I thought you boiled the eggs.

That's what the timer was for.

Ugh.

Hey, Kimch, check it out.

What, more chipmunks?
They're not going to hurt you.

No, that guy.
I think that's Shannon's bike.

Yeah. That's definitely it.
You up for this?

Oh, yeah.

Hey, bro, nice bike.
Where'd you get it?

- Someone gave it to me.
- Oh, yeah?

That's pretty ironic

'cause, uh, it looks exactly
like my friend's bike.

That's not how irony works.

You better give us that bike.

Look,

there's obviously
been a misunderstanding.

(SIGHS)

I can't believe Appa would say
something so stupid.

Yeah. He don't appreciate what I do.

Gerald's exactly the same.

I mentioned one thing about
how he washes his clothes,

and he gets all up in my face.

Yeah. And your Appa only still
thinking about himself.

And then he goes on
about how I'm so messy

and don't do dishes every day.

But I'm trying to save the planet.

He doesn't get that.

You know, all men is the same.

Your Appa don't even see how much I...

And who doesn't
take a shower after a bath?

- Janet, this is not about you!
- I know, it's about Gerald.

No, this is about me.

Your Appa don't appreciate,
you don't listen,

and Gerald is right.

Okay, I get that you're in
a sensitive place right now,

but it's not my fault your generation

let men diminish the achievements

of hard-working women.

I work hard, deserve award!

And you could work harder
to cleaning up!

Because I'm a woman?

No, because you is messy like a pig!

I am... You...

(GRUNTS)

Wait, Janet, come back here!
Janet, you tea bag!

Janet! Janet,
the tea bag is here! Tea bag!

FRANK: Is it AA or AAA?

What they should do
is make a combo pack.

Just buy both,
and make combo pack at home.

Oh...

Ooh, someone's in the doghouse.

Woof.

- Can I offer some advice?
- No.

Never go to bed angry.
Or hungry for that matter.

Bernice and I used to stash

a box of crackers in the night stand...

Frank, why I would take advice
from you when you is divorce?

- (SIGHS) What I mean is...
- Hey, hey... No, no, no.

I stuck my hand in a gopher
hole, and I got bit. Yeah.

Mrs. Kim is win award for business.

Uh-huh.

I tell her only reason she win
is because she is a,

you know...

Asian?

- A woman!
- Oh, right, right.

- Wow, that's a doozie.
- Yeah.

I was never any good
with awards, either.

They all went to my brother, Dean.

Provincial track champ,
which is where he met Kathy.

She had a speech impediment,

but I never held that against her.

Frank, what's you point?

The point is,

I used to sneak into Dean's room

just to stare at those trophies.

One day I took one down,

and accidentally smashed a mug

that Kathy had potted for Dean.

I tried to bury it in the backyard,

which is how I dug up
Cinnamon, our Irish setter.

(CHUCKLES)

Dean had quite a laugh at that.

But who's laughing now?

I don't know.

Not Dean, he got hit by a truck.

And I miss him dearly.

- You see what I'm getting at?
- No.

I never got to apologize
for the comic book.

What comic book?

Did I not mention the comic book?

(APPA SIGHS)

That's really key to the whole thing.

The point is,

I don't wanna be remembered
for the things I broke,

I wanna be remembered
for the things I fixed.

Now, I've forgotten why I came in here.

Right, box of crackers.

Did you see the look on his face?

Oh, man, so shocked!

Hey, look what we found.

- K-Town boys representin'!
- Whoo!

Where did you find it?

We caught the guy red-handed.

Some sketchy-looking dude
says he found it.

No, no, no, someone gave it to him.

Right.

- Jung was badass.
- (CHUCKLES)

- You didn't hurt him, did you?
- What? Of course not.

Good. Because I did
kind of give it to him.

- What?
- I felt bad for him.

It seemed like he could use it more

with his nomadic lifestyle.

Seriously? The rims alone
are worth bucks.

Okay, I'm sorry,

I wanted to love it, I really did.

But it's just so hot,
and the seat kills,

and you can't carry a coffee,

and the hand signals
are all so confusing.

Like, why is this right turn?

- It's not.
- See?

So, you just gave it away?

Yeah.

Dude, we just stole a guy's bike.

No, I'm the one that
actually paid for the bike.

But I gave you money for it.

Well, not the full amount, but yeah.

And she gave it to that guy.

Yeah, we stole that guy's bike.

So, our neighbour
keeps calling me "Ray."

I think I've let it go on for too long.

I might just have to run with it now.

Look, I overreacted before,
and got defensive...

I know, I got defensive, too,

and then my hands started sweating...

I'm really sorry.

Oh, it just happens,

I think it's stress in the hand glands.

I mean, I'm sorry about yelling.

Oh, yeah. Me, too.

Um...

- Are you moving out?
- No.

- I cleaned.
- Oh.

Feels a lot bigger in here
without all the stuff.

That we both leave around.

(CHUCKLES LIGHTLY)

Okay, I'm going to bed.

- Okay.
- Good night.

Oh, um, before you go to bed,
one more thing...

So, when you're spreading
peanut butter around,

can you just use all the peanut butter

instead of leaving half of it
on the Kn*fe and in the sink?

Oh. (CHUCKLES)

Ha ha.

Okay. Good night.

(SIGHS) Yeah, closing time.

- I don't want cookie.
- You deserve cookie.

You think cookie fix?

I think cookie taste good.

- I do lots of thing, Appa.
- I know.

I don't need award.

I don't care what other people think,

I only care what you think.

- And you think we is not same.
- No, we is not the same.

(SCOFFS)

I want chip over here,
you move chip over here.

We sell more chip.

I want Clear Pepsi.
We order Clear Pepsi.

We still have Clear Pepsi.

You want second baby.

I don't think it's a good idea.

- Then we have Janet.
- (SOBS AND CHUCKLES)

I still don't think it's a good idea.

(CHUCKLES) Appa.

You not win award because you is woman,

you win award because you is smart

and good at business.

(UMMA GASPS)

You fix.

Frank help.

But not for Don't Touch Wall upstairs.

Here, everybody can see.

(GASPS)

I like there. (CHUCKLES)

(APPA SIGHS)

Frank...

Dude, we are so sorry.

It's okay.

KIMCHEE: - Huge misunderstanding.

Please, take the bike.

It's all good. Got a new bike.

That's your bike?

Yeah, I forgot my key.

Seriously, take this one.

Mine's way nicer.

It's got better shifters,
carbon forks, this thing.

Here, grab the other end, and
we'll get some leverage going.

Come on.

MAN: Hey. That's my (BLEEP) bike!

Okay, I'll take it.

Dude, drop the cutters.

Are you kidding? These are
worth, like, bucks.

- Let's go!
- Yeah, that doesn't look good.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)