03x24 - Home for Christmas (Part 1)

[bunniefuu]

(bell rings)

♪ When I wake up in the morning
and the alarm gives out a warning ♪

♪ I don't think I'll ever
make it on time ♪

♪ By the time I grab my books
and I give myself a look ♪

♪ I'm at the comer just in time
to see the bus fly by ♪

♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

♪ If the teacher pops a test
I know I'm in a mess ♪

♪ And my dog ate
all my homework last night ♪

♪ Ridin' low in my chair,
she won't know that I'm there ♪

♪ if I can hand it in tomorrow
it will be all right ♪

♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell... ♪

♪ It's all right,
'cause I'm saved by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right, 'cause I'm saved
by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right,
'cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

- Mom, I'm home!
- Mom: Hi, honey!

I just got what
I wanted for Christmas.

- Jessie: What's that?
- Two weeks off from school.

Screech: Does that mean
I don't have to buy you a gift?

- Think again.
- He doesn't think

ever since he looked up the chimney
and Santa stepped on his head.

- Do I smell cookies?
- You certainly do, Kelly.

Zack helped me bake them.

- You baked?
- Yeah, I made gingerbread women.

Gingerbread chicks.
I like it.

For you, they should have made
gingerbread pigs.

Come on, help yourselves.

Hey, don't you have
any more cookie women?

Why? You need a date
for New Year's Eve?

Now that school's out, how do you all
plan to spend your holidays?

I needed to buy gifts for my sisters,
so I got a job at a men's store.

I didn't know your sisters
wore men's clothes.

I got a job at the mall,
in Gift Wrap.

Gift Wrap? Isn't that
an MC Hammer Christmas song?

Slater, you know, Gift Wrap can get
pretty hectic this time of year.

Don't worry about it, Mrs. M.
I'm good at everything I do.

Yeah? Not according
to the girls I talked to.

- What about you, Jessie?
- I'm working at a photo booth

where kids get their pictures
taken with Santa.

- I didn't know you liked children.
- I don't. I like $8 an hour!

I'm volunteering at a hospital.
I want to help cheer up kids

- who can't go home for Christmas.
- That's very generous of you, Lisa.

Sometimes the best gifts are
the ones you can't wrap.

You guys, don't forget
you promised to buy gifts

for the kids at our hospital
Christmas party.

And Screech, no gifts that breathe,
lay eggs or bite!

There you are.

I'm sure your daughter
will love the champagne glasses.

Oops. I guess
I forgot to tape the bottom.

You klutz!

Ma'am, please try to stay calm.
It's my first day here

and I don't want it to be my last--
what are you doing?

It was the only set of glasses
like that in the mall!

Preppie, help!

Ma'am, please. I'm sure this gentleman
will be very glad to pay for them.

- The money.
- Okay.

I'm sorry about this.
There you go.

(gasps)
Thank you.

- You okay, buddy?
- Whoa, this is some job.

I'm making $4 an hour,

I'm spending $40.

These are for the kids at the hospital.
Wrap them better, okay?

Kids just rip it apart anyway.

Okay, Tommy, smile for Santa.

- I don't want to.
- Okay, how about smiling for me?

No!

Tommy, if you don't smile,

I'm gonna tell Santa
not to bring you what you want.

Ow!

Santa's going to get you,
little brat!

Keep spreading
that Christmas cheer, Jessie.

Wait till you see what
I bought for the kids!

- Go get a table.
- All right.

- Ow! Jeez!
- Hey, watch where you're going!

Sorry, I didn't see you.
I'm sure glad I bumped into you.

- I'm Zack Morris.
- I'm... late for work.

- My lunch.
- I'm sorry.

An apple?
You call this lunch?

- I'm on a diet.
- Why?

- You look great to me.
- I do?

Well, thank you.
I got to go.

- Wait, I didn't catch your name.
- Laura. Bye!

Where are you going?

I don't know what it is, but there's
something different about her.

No there isn't.
Every girl in L.A. is on a diet.

You've got to help me find her.
She works in the mall.

Okay, but first,
check out this doll.

- It's called "Squeeze and Squirt."
- Very nice.

- Just have Slater wrap it.
- Not yet.

First, I want
to make sure it works.

I think it works.

Oh my gosh!
It won't stop!

- What do I do?!
- I don't know.

How should I know?
Take it to the bathroom, bathroom!

Good idea!
Men's or ladies'?

What?! Go!

Hurry up, Screech,
you've got to help me find Laura.

(toilet flushes)

- Why did you flush the toilet?
- She had to go to the bathroom.

- Did you have an accident, son?
- Oh. It's not what you think.

I'm potty trained.
She isn't.

You want to know how to get
your pants dry in a hurry?

Please. Zack won't be seen
with me in public like this.

Come on over here.
Stand underneath this hand dryer.

Point the nozzle down.

- Thanks for the tip.
- That's okay.

I've been caught in the rain
many times.

Thanks, mister!
Nice guy, huh?

Let's hurry up, man.

- Screech, look.
- He's shaving.

Don't stare!

How can I look
if I don't stare, dummy?

Excuse me, are you all right?

I'll be okay.
I didn't eat breakfast today.

You shouldn't leave your house
without breakfast.

It's the most important
meal of the day!

Screech, I think he's homeless.

- Then he should eat out.
- He doesn't have a place to live!

Oh.

Both: Oh!

Gee, mister, I didn't know.

- I'm sorry.
- That's okay.

I've got a bigger bathroom here
than I even did at home.

You live--

what I mean is...
you live here in the mall?

No, I just stopped in to do
a little Christmas shaving.

Kinda makes me look
like Santa Claus, don't you think?

Nah. He's fat.
He eats breakfast.

We've got to go look for the girl.

- There's money in here.
- Ooh, I got dibs on it--

- Is it yours, mister?
- There's no money in there, son.

I'd check again.

Merry Christmas.

Thanks to you, son.

So you're working
to buy Christmas gifts too?

No, I-- I just remembered there's
another box of sweaters in the back.

Hey, Kelly.
How's it going?

- Fine. What's up?
- Well, I'm looking for a girl.

Zack, we only sell clothes here.

No, it's someone I met
then I lost in the crowd.

- There she is!
- You mean Laura?

- Hi!
- Hi.

- I've been looking all over for you.
- Me? Why?

Because I want
to take you to lunch.

Hi! Zack, I looked all over,
couldn't find Laura.

- Keep looking.
- Right.

So, can I take you to lunch?

- I brought my lunch, remember?
- You brought an apple.

So is it a date?

- We just met.
- You know, Zack is my friend.

He's safe if you eat
near a security guard.

Hey, Zack, there's
that homeless guy again.

He's homeless?
The poor man.

Of course, he's poor.
That's why he's homeless.

I gave him some money.
I just hope he spends it on food.

- What do you mean by that?
- When you give a guy a handout,

you can't be sure if he's
really hungry, or a wino, or worse.

So, pick you up at 12:30?

Forget it.
I just lost my appetite.

Okay, let me get this straight.

The chick dumped you
before your first date?

Well...

yeah.

That belongs in the "Guinness
Book of Records!"

- Even Screech does better than that!
- Thanks.

Look, Zack, she's probably
playing hard to get.

- You think so?
- Uh-huh, and she's good at it too.

You're sitting there with your tongue
hanging out and no lollipop to lick!

Hey, Lisa, guess what
I'm wearing!

- Is that mistletoe?
- Yep.

- Make you want to do anything?
- Yeah, run away.

- Hi, guys.
- Hey. What's up?

Kelly, you go ahead and eat.

- I'll be back later.
- Laura.

I'm sorry if I offended you.

I really don't know much
about the homeless people.

In my neighborhood, a poor family
is one who doesn't have cable.

So... please stay.

You know, Zack is a good guy.

Yeah, give him a break.

Laura...

Christmas is supposed
to be a happy time,

but ever since Zack thought
he hurt you, he's been real sad.

- Who are you?
- Screech his geeky sidekick.

- You're a good friend.
- You think so?

- Want to go out Saturday?
- Hey!

I'm going to go get some lunch.
Do you need anything?

- No, thanks. I'm not that hungry.
- I'm sorry about that.

So, tell me about yourself.

You live around here?

- I live with my dad.
- Oh. Where?

Actually, we're in
the process of moving.

We move around a lot.
Could I have a chip?

- Sure.
- Thanks.

Does your dad travel a lot
in his business?

He's between jobs right now.

- I thought you said you weren't hungry.
- You know what they say about chips.

Oh sure.

Bet you can't eat just 50.

So, how's your ice cream?

Just what I needed
after your burger.

I guess I was hungrier
than I thought.

Have you told Santa
what you want for Christmas?

- Not yet.
- Then let's go do it!

- You're crazy!
- Come on!

Okay, who's next
for a picture with Santa?

Tommy, you're back!
Why?

My mom told me
to apologize to you.

Tommy, that's nice.

I'm sorry...
you ugly old bag!

You little brat!

And a Merry Christmas
to you, Jessie.

- Jessie, this is Laura.
- Both: Hi.

She has to be back at work,
so can we cut in?

- I'm sorry, this is his idea.
- No, it's okay.

As long as you don't
kick me or bite me.

Come on!

Santa, meet Laura. She's 17
and has been a good girl all year.

That's good, Laura.

- And have you been a good boy?
- (scoffs) Get real!

Tell me, Laura,
what do you want for Christmas?

I don't know.

Nobody's ever
asked me that before.

But I'll try.

Zack:
Thanks, Santa.

- Thanks for squeezing us in.
- Here's your picture.

- Jessie, how much do we owe you?
- Uh...

No charge.
Santa says it's on him.

Hey, what did you say to him?

- I can't tell you, Zack. It's personal.
- What's important is

that you have been a good girl all year.
So this is for you.

Luring girls with candy again?

- Hi, Mom.
- Hi, honey.

- Mom, meet Laura.
- Watch out for my son.

He starts with hard candy
then works up to chocolate kisses.

- That's how his dad got me.
- I'll be careful.

Mom, Mom.

- Is the play set for Saturday?
- What play?

"A Christmas Carol."
We'll do it right here in the mall.

I was just making
some last-minute arrangements.

"A Christmas Carol"?
I've always loved that story.

Would you like to be
in it with us?

That'd be fun.
The whole g*ng's in it.

I would love to...

but it's my first day on the job.

Don't you think it's early
to ask for some time off?

Not if you've worked
the whole morning.

I'm sure most store owners would love
to have their employees in the play.

- It's good for business.
- You really think it's all right?

Yeah. Your boss is letting Kelly off.
Why not you?

All right, I'll ask.
It was nice to meet you, Mrs. Morris.

- You too.
- Bye, Zack.

So do you know what you
want for Christmas yet?

Oh yeah.

I don't think I can find a box
big enough for her.

Slater, will you hurry up?!

If you take any longer,
that blouse will be out of style!

I'm doing the best I can.

Now, where did I put
that piece of tape?

- It's on your nose.
- Huh?

Ow!

I hope Dancer and Prancer
drop a surprise on your car.

- There, all done.
- Thank you.

Wait, Lisa.

Mind if I try?

Don't worry, I wrap
a lot neater than I look.

Is that okay with you, thumbs?

Fine.

I always did enjoy wrapping
Christmas presents.

- I always enjoy getting them.
- Do you like giving too?

Oh yeah.
She just gave me a headache.

There you go.

One Christmas bow
coming right up!

It's beautiful!
Thank you, mister.

- You're welcome.
- I'll see you at the hospital at 6:00.

Gift Wrap is not for me.
Thanks for helping.

Now, what can I do for you, sir?

I was wondering if you'd give me some
of those scraps you're throwing away.

Tell you what,
I'll do better than that.

- Here you go.
- Thanks, but won't you get in trouble?

Nah. I waste more than that
wrapping a ring!

When you buy your gift,
I'll wrap it for you.

Thanks, but I've
seen you in action.

Hey, come on, Slater, let's go.

We have to pick up the girls
and meet Lisa at the hospital.

I'll be on my five.

- What's up, buddy?
- What's up?

- Hey, guys, what's going on?
- I'm not sure.

Wait. I think someone's
lying on the ground.

- Guys, look who it is!
- Oh no!

Come on, let's help him!
Excuse me. Back up.

- Screech: Is he still alive?
- Are you okay?

- Screech, call 911.
- Right. What's the number?

Man! 911 is the number!
Call it quick!

- Open it up.
- Okay.

Put one hand under his neck
and left it gently.

- Got it.
- Put your other hand on his forehead

- and push back until his chin tilts up.
- Does this open his airway?

I learned it
in lifeguard training.

- (wheezing)
- He's having trouble breathing.

Give me that mouth guard.
Move, I got it.

(blows air)

Well, I'm out of here
in five minutes.

Thinking about Zack again?

I can't believe he took me
to see Santa Claus.

I'm surprised he didn't
make you sit on his knee!

- He's really fun. Look.
- Both: How cute!

Save the chatter
for your next pajama party!

I'm sorry, Mr. Moody. Laura was
showing me a picture of Santa Claus.

The fat guy in red!

He's got a cholesterol problem.

Mr. Moody, can I
ask you something?

You just did.
Now get back to work.

Please?

I know I just started, but...
can I be in the Christmas play too?

No! You'll be working!

Everyone wants me to be generous
just because it's Christmas!

Who needs to see
"A Christmas Carol"?

We've got our own Scrooge here!

Hi, guys.

Is something wrong?

You know the homeless person
I met this morning?

- He passed out in the mall today.
- What happened to him? Is he okay?

I don't know.
They took him to the hospital.

We'd better get there ourselves.

Lisa's waiting
for us to give out gifts.

- See you, Laura.
- Bye. I'll see you later.

Bye.

Would you like to hang
this star on top of the tree?

I'm too small!

Not anymore.
Hold this.

Place it right on top.
There you go!

I told you you could do it.

You know something?
You're cute.

So are you... for a girl.

When is Santa coming?

(bells ringing)

I think that's him now.

Santa:
Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!

Hi, Santa.
Is this Mrs. Claus?

Yes, she wouldn't stay
at the North Pole

when I told her I was
coming to California.

As soon as this party's over,
I'm taking the sleigh to the beach!

- Hey, Rudolph.
- Hey, Lisa.

Want to play any reindeer games?

What the heck?
It's Christmas.

She kissed me!
Santa finally gave me what I asked for!

Thanks!

- Merry Christmas!
- All: Merry Christmas!

Kelly:
Who wants candy canes?

All right!

Here you go.

Who wrapped this?

Hey, it's what's inside
that counts.

Oh. You wrapped it.

Come here, kid.

Kelly:
Is it a police car? Vroom, vroom!

Well, Lisa...
(laughs)

Your party is a big success.

Our party.

You know, Zack, I can't remember
a Christmas where I've had more fun

and didn't get a thing.

Santa will fix that!

- Here you go.
- Thanks. It matches my uniform.

- Hey, guys.
- Zack: Hey, buddy.

- Let's go visit that homeless guy.
- Yeah, good idea.

- Screech: We'll take him a present.
- Hey, Lisa,

you know the room
number of the guy?

No, but Monique over there would.
She's in Admitting.

Hi, Monique,
I'm looking for a man.

So am I, but here
they're either married or sick!

I mean a homeless guy who collapsed
in the Bayside mall today.

Oh, him.
Nice, but too old for me.

He's in the East wing, room 306.

- Thanks, Monique.
- Thank you.

Well, kids, Santa and his little helpers
have to be going now.

- There's a big snowstorm coming.
- It never snows in Los Angeles!

Says who?

♪ Dashing through the snow ♪

♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪

♪ Over the field we go ♪

♪ Laughing all the way--
ha ha ha! ♪

♪ Bells on bobtails ring ♪

♪ Making spirits bright ♪

♪ What fun it is to ride and sing
a sleighing song tonight ♪

♪ Oh! Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way! ♪

♪ Oh what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh ♪

♪ Hey! Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way... ♪

- I hope he's feeling better.
- Monique said he was just run down.

She's wrong.
There were no cars near him.

Laura?
What are you doing here?

Visiting.
He's my father.

(instrumental theme music plays)