01x10 - It's Laughter They're After

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Monsters at Word". Aired: July 7, 2021 to present.*
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Animated series continuing the story of Monsters, Inc. Film, it follows a graduate Tylor working as a mechanic in the Facilities Team.
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01x10 - It's Laughter They're After

Post by bunniefuu »

(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

And there we go.
"It's laughter we're after".

Yeah. New slogan's kind
of growing on me.

And our very own MIFTer,
Double T, came up with it.

- That's right.
- I still like mine.

"Funny business is our business.

And it's none of your business,
so mind your own business".

- (ENGINE STARTS)
- Yeah. Yeah. That is way better.

- (KIDS LAUGHING)
- (TEETH CHATTERING)

(HONKING)

Remember to tip your monster.
I'll be here all week. (CHUCKLES)

Hey, hey, Mikey!

How's my favorite monster of comedy?

On top of the world, Sulley.

Look around. My comedy
classes have really paid off.

Only one laugh station left to fill.

Yep, Monsters Inc.'s future
could not be brighter.

(ELECTRICITY SURGING)

(POWERING DOWN)

By brighter, I meant
more bright than this.

- Like, not dark.
- (BUZZER SOUNDS)

Although some dark is actually okay.

But this dark, it's...
it's very not bright.

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLES)

Good night

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

So I said to Celia, "Listen, order
mine with the mildew on the side,

- I'm watching my shape..."
- CELIA: Mike! Sulley!

She's back!

(OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING)

(SULLEY CLEARS THROAT)

- Yikes!
- Mike...

(GRUNTS)

Roz, so nice of you to gross
us with your presence.

You've been oozing weight.

The Monstropolis Energy Regulatory
Commission has determined

you're not generating enough power.

You work for M.E.R.C. now?

There's a lot about me you don't know.

Roz, laugh power's ten times
more powerful than scream.

The commission isn't
convinced it's reliable.

Therefore, we're transferring
all power needs to Fear Co.

- Fear Co. still uses scare power.
- We won't go down without a fight.

We can provide all the power
the city needs.

There's gotta be a way we can prove it.

Sure, Sulley. But it's not like we can

generate a million gigglewatts in a day.

- It's a deal!
- Deal? What deal? I made a deal?

Generate a million
gigglewatts in one day,

and laugh power is saved.

But we only generate half that now.

Just give us time to figure
out the laughgistics.

- Tomorrow.
- Tomorrow? Right, well... (CHUCKLES)

That gives us plenty of today time.

All righty, MIFTers, as you all
have heard, Monsters Inc. has to...

Whoa! Who put you in charge
of the dry erase board?

You need deputy supervisor permission
to use that equipment.

Can I use the dry erase board, Duncan?

Yeah, go ahead. No big deal. Continue.

Monsters Inc. has to increase
its gigglewatt output,

or we're shut down.

So, I thought us MIFTers could
get to working on some ideas.

I got an idea. Go back to scream power.

- If it ain't broke...
- Duncan!

Bump my pay, I'll laugh all
the way to the bank, amigo.

Uh, okay, let's think this through.

Ten times the power means
ten times the canisters.

So, maybe instead
of the little canisters,

we make a bigger canister.

FRITZ: But bigger than your drawing?

'Cause the one in your drawing
looks so small and cute.

Fewer canisters,
less load and reload time.

A more efficient Laugh Floor.

I like my "bring back scare power"
idea. Boom, scream, done.

Cutter, make a prototype,
but bigger than the drawing.

Big canister. Picking up what
you're putting down. On it.

Well, uh, there's probably gonna be
more stuff to figure out.

You think you'll have time between
regular work and comedy class?

Oh, well, I, uh...
I wouldn't worry about that.

- VAL: Huh?
- I am not going to comedy class anymore.

- Uh, but, uh...
- I threw all my jokester stuff away.

You know, the books,
the naked poultry, the...

No, you didn't.

Yeah, threw it all away in the trash.

- All of it.
- I don't believe you.

Yeah, Val, the, uh...
The jokester thing just...

was, uh... never really gonna happen.

But, uh, you know,
full-time MIFTer here.

(CHUCKLES) Guess you're
stuck with me for good.

ANNOUNCER: Tylor Tuskmon,
report to the Simulation Room.


The doctor said he couldn't
see him right now.
(CHUCKLES)

Are the peels supposed to do
something or is that on me?


Box, box, box. Rope, rope. Wind.

As you can see, Mr. Tuskmon,

you are a tragically unfunny monster,

which is what I said out loud,

right to your face
the last time I saw you.

But... then this happened.

See that?

Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry, Ms. Flint.

Mini Monster Day was
kind of, uh, rough for me.

No, no! That!

My daughter. She's smiling.

Because of you.

It's the power of laughter,
and you have it.

I do?

Oh, I share your disbelief.
But I've crunched the numbers.

Those horns combined
with an uncontrolled fall

resulting in debris hanging
from said horns

yield significant gigglewatts.

The simple physics of physical comedy.

What she means is,
"Kid, you're a natural".

Well, he auditioned times.

Kid, you're persistent.

And we got one station left
on that Laugh Floor.

I need you to fill it.

- You mean, I'm a jokester?
- In training.

You help us hit a million gigglewatts,

I'd say you got a pretty good chance.

Internal transfer document,
child hazard release,

life liability waiver, I- form,
anti-social security.

Boy, you must be excited
to be getting out of MIFT.

Well, it's not official.
Just, uh, in training.

Talk about a bunch of weirdos!

Well, they're actually not that weird.
They, uh, kind of grow on you.

Wait a minute.

You still wanna be
a jokester, don't you?

- Oh, yeah! Well, yes. Of course.
- Good!

Closet malfunction insurance,
laffateria discount,

gross salary plus over-slime.

SULLEY: "It's laughter we're after".

You're the one that came
up with that, remember?

Your first day here.

You've done something even
James P. Sullivan himself hasn't done.

Gone from scarer to jokester.

Just, uh, in training.

You're nervous. I understand.

(SIGHS)

I just wish we could go back
to scare power, you know?

I mean, that's what I'm good at.

And you, you could be back on the
Scare Floor, be Top Scarer again.

I never told you about
what happened with Boo.

The fear in her eyes
when she was scared.

I... I didn't like what I saw.

What I saw in me.

Laugh power is the heart
of the new Monsters Inc.

And it's also the right thing to do.

- (GASPS) Are those Krispy Screams?
- Yeah. Yeah. (CHUCKLES)

Should have a big canister
prototype soon.

Very good, Cutter.

(SNIFFS) Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Krispy Screams!

Yeah. I'm trying to cut back, hon.

So, uh, only three for me. Yeah.

Give me seven.

So, what happened?
You never came back yesterday.

I mean, I was getting
my hopes up. (LAUGHS)

Um, well, uh, yesterday Mike said

he's got one station left
on the Laugh Floor and...

- Well...
- He made you a jokester?

TYLOR: Uh, jokester in training.

Congrats! It's what you wanted
since the day you got here.

What? Oh, yeah, great. Yeah, totally.

A jokester? But I thought
you weren't funny.

It's just for today. It's not
like, you know, official.

Come on! If you help 'em
hit a million gigglewatts,

there's no way
Mr. Wazowski's letting you go.

Yeah. I guess. Um...

But, hey, you know what?
I'll still be around.

So, it's not goodbye.

MIKE: (OVER PA)
Can I have your attention?

Tylor Tuskmon, please
report to morning warm-up.


Tylor... Tylor, get up here!

(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING)

Goodbye.

And don't let the door hit you
in the horns on the way out.

- (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
- (HORN TOOTS)

A million gigglewatts! Let's get
those funny bones warmed up.

Keep going. Fit monsters
are funny monsters.

Funny face, funny face, funny face.
Hallway light!

Spin left, spin right.
Spin left, spin right.

More donuts, more funny.

Kid, that's funny. Perfect!

Hey, Fritz, I cleared out Tylor's desk.
Where do you want all this?

FRITZ: (CRYING) Who cares?

I gotta get back to working
on the canister, so I'll just, uh...

put this here before
you start blubbering.

(SOBBING)

Too late.

On his first day here, I told Ty-Ty
I could be like a father to him.

- He's got a father.
- A grandfather.

- Okay.
- Great-grandfather.

- Okay.
- Or the father that he never knew he had,

and then shows up one day
with a lousy explanation

- as to where he's been all your life.
- Uh-huh.

(SOBBING) I just want him back!

Uh, you realize, if it all works out,
he'll just be upstairs.

Right.

Hey, that gives me an idea.

(BANANA BREAD SPUTTERS)

Heya, Winchester!

Welcome aboard! Hope your
first day isn't your last. Ha!

(CHUCKLES) Me too. Me too. Thanks!

- Yeah, I'll... see you out there.
- See ya!

- "It's laughter we're after!"
- SANDERSON: You got it.

- (DOOR CLOSES)
- I came up with... I came up with that.

Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!

TYLOR: Big day, huh?

Tylor Tuskmon, new guy.
Uh, Phlegm, right?

Uh, yeah.

But, um, I actually use this time

to prepare mentally for my performance

and prefer no distractions.

Oh, sure, sure. Yeah, I get it.

Thank you!

Ouch! Ouch! (YELPS)

All right, monsters of
comedy, this is it.

One million gigglewatts is our goal,
or... (IMITATES SLITTING THROAT)

See you on the Laugh Floor in one hour.

Ty-Ty, we need you down in MIFT.

- There's an emergency!
- What kind?

I can't tell you. It's a surprise.

A surprise emergency... with cake!

- VAL: Surprise, Double T.
- Thank you. You're welcome!

A surprise emergency!

- VAL: Whoo-hoo!
- (HORN TOOTS)

I know we don't have much time,

but we wanted to wish you good luck.

- Help yourself to some dead David cake.
- VAL: Not dead!

It's been in the freezer for a few
years, so it's got a little bite.

Aw! Thanks, guys. That's really kind.

I wish I had more time,
but I have to get upstairs.

Right! Now, everybody,
pick a letter in Tylor's name

and say something nice
and good luck-y about him.

Oh, I'll go first.

Uh... "T".

"T" is for "treason".

Something nice!

Tedious. Tiresome. Two-faced!

- VAL: Duncan!
- Yeah, yeah, all right. Uh...

Well, "T" is, uh, for
(SNIFFLES) "thank you".

Thank you for being a worthy,

stupid adversary.

"Y" is for "You proved me wrong, kid".

Figured you'd leave here in a box.
Consider me impressed.

"L" is for "love".

As in, we love you, Tylor.

And we sure would love
you to stay, but...

"O" is for "Oh, well".

"R" is for "remember".

Remember when I met you
in Origins of Fear class?

(CRYING) I thought to myself,

"One day that big doofus is gonna
be my best... (SNIFFLES) bud".

(SOBBING)

Uh, wow, guys. Thanks. It means a lot.

The day I got here,

this was the last place
that I wanted to be.

I mean, the fluorescent lights
gave me headache.

It smelled like Roto's pee. But now...

(SIGHS)

Maybe this is where I belong.

- CUTTER: You're staying?
- You want to stay?

- You wanna stay?
- Are you sure?

'Cause I know you, and you really...

Don't question it, Val.

He wants to stay. He just
said he wants to stay.

Well, okay.

You did throw away all your joke stuff.

Welcome back to MIFT, Ty-Ty.
Val, help me with his box.

(SINGING) ♪ I was so sad ♪

♪ The boy I never had ♪

♪ Up and ran away ♪

♪ But now, I'm filled with joy ♪

♪ My metaphoric boy ♪

♪ Has come back... ♪

- (TOY SQUEAKS)
- Huh?

(FARTING NOISES)

I knew it. He didn't throw
out his joke stuff.

"Dear Mister Tuskmon..."

- (KIDS LAUGHING)
- (TOYS SQUEAKING)

(PHLEGM GROWLS)


Oh, boy. Thank you, Winchester.

MONSTER: Yeah! Yeah!

(MONSTERS CHEERING)

You all set, jokester-in-training?

Oh, it's just for today,
for Monsters Inc.

You know, for Sulley.
Then back to being a MIFTer.

- Right.
- MIKE: Great! There you are, kid.

Come on, we're about to go live.

All right, this is it.

One million gigglewatts is our goal.
No pressure. Have fun.

But we're dead if we don't do it.

(BUZZER SOUNDS)

(BEEPING)

- (HORNS HONK)
- (BREATHES DEEPLY, YELPS)

(SPUTTERING)

(TEETH CHATTERING)

Uh, sorry. Celia, I don't have a door.

Is there someone who...

Oh, we're a little understaffed.

I was gonna help you, but Roz has
me up to my snakes in paperwork.

Maybe Fungus could help?

I'll do it. I know how
to run the door station.

Perfect. Here, this
should get you started.

Oh, thank you, Val.

Door time.

(BEEPS)

(DINGS)

I'm really glad you're here.

Me too. Now, let's get those giggles.

- (HORN TOOTS)
- (CHATTERING)

Ready? In five, four, three, two, one!

(BUZZER SOUNDS)

(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

(SIGHS)

Here goes.

(FLOORBOARD CREAKING)

Whoa! (GRUNTS)

(GIGGLING)

(TRILLS)

Hey, good job.

Was it? I mean, she hardly even giggled.

- Well, it's a start.
- FRITZ: Ty-Ty!

- Get back in there, muscles!
- You got more giggles to get.

Rah-rah, sis boom blah.

- (DOOR DINGS)
- Here we go!

Whoa!

- (BOY LAUGHING)
- (BEEPS)

(CHEERING)

(KID LAUGHING)

MIKE: Get me another canister, Fungus.

I'm going in.

(CHILDREN LAUGHING)

(LAUGHING)

(GURGLING)

(DINGS)

(YELPS, SCREAMS)

(CHILDREN LAUGHING)

(DINGS)

(DINGS)

CELIA: Two minutes remaining.

Almost there.

It's all up to you, Mikey.

- Okay! Load her up, Fungus.
- Yes, sir.

(MIKE GRUNTING)

We're out of canisters!
No more canisters!

No! It's okay.

- Smitty found one more out back.
- Thanks!

Come on. Come on. Come on.

(RATTLING)

Faulty canister. Faulty canister! Run!

(CRASHES, HISSING)

Where out back did you
find that canister?

Out back by the dumpster.

- (BUZZER SOUNDS)
- Faulty canister, sir.

Well, get another one!

There are no "another ones"!

Except for mamma's sweet baby.

- What is that?
- (CHUCKLES)

- Is that a...
- Tylor's idea.

Laugh power is ten times
more powerful than screams.

- So you need a bigger canister.
- Cutter likey.

Well, hook it up. Hook it up!

Forty-five seconds.

- You got this, Mikey.
- Good luck, Googly Bear.

(EXHALES)

(CLOCK TICKING)

- (KID LAUGHING)
- (CANISTER TRILLING)

Fifteen seconds.

Ten seconds.

- Five sec...
- Thank you, thank you. Well?

- (BELL RINGS)
- (BUZZER SOUNDS)

- Laugh power is saved!
- (ALL CHEERING)

Nice going, Mike.

Monsters Inc. is saved.

Congratulations.

- Way to go, Mike.
- You're the comedy king, Mr. Wazowski.

Say, Roz. Why don't you get Roze
over here to celebrate?

It's strange, I haven't
picked up her scent today.

Called in sick.

She's not sick. You're her. She's you.

- (GROANS)
- You change sweaters and hair color.

Two monsters can't have
the same bad breath.

- Reveal your true identity!
- Ha-ha!

Up top!

- MIKE: Come on!
- (BOTH CHUCKLES)

You know what? I think we made
a pretty good team today.

Yeah, we did.

Oh, Ty-Ty, I am so proud of you.

That big canister saved the day.

Yeah. (CLEARS THROAT)

Not bad, College Boy. Could
have been worse, but it wasn't.

MIKE: You bet it wasn't.

In fact, if it wasn't for your laughs
and that big canister,

we'd be out of business.

- Welcome to the Laugh Floor.
- Wait, you mean...

Kid, you're officially a jokester!

We'll see you back here
first thing in the morning.

Nice job, Tylor.

No, no, no, no.

This was just for today.
I'm, uh... I'm going.

We got your new desk all ready for you.

ANNOUNCER: Welcome...

- (SIGHS)
- ... to Monsters, Incorporated.

Remember, "It's laughter we're after".

Morning, Tylor.

- Morning.
- Morning, Tylor.

- MONSTER: Welcome!
- Nice to see you.

Good morning. Morning, everybody.

Hey, morning, Sulley.

Good morning, Tylor.

(KID LAUGHING)

Great job, Mikey. You filled your
quota on the first kid of the day.

Not bad, huh?

Only somebody with
perfect comedic timing

could produce this much
energy in one sh*t.

Uh-huh, and laughter being
ten times more powerful

than scream had nothing to do with it.

Oh, Googly Bear! Come here, you.

Schmoopsie-poo!

(KIDS LAUGHING)

MIKE: I'm on the cover of a magazine!

(FRITZ SNIFFLING)

I don't know how I can be so sadly happy

and happily sad at the same time!

I am emotionally conflicted.

Hey, guys. What are you doing here?

Oh, we just wanted to wish you
good luck on your first day.

Official jokester.

- We're proud of you.
- Eh, they made me come.

Well, thanks.

I'm just waiting here for
my official laugh assistant.

(WHIRRING)

Uh, wait.

- You're my assistant?
- VAL: Yep.

Yesterday was a blast!

So, I talked to Celia
and got a transfer.

Besides, we gotta bring some of that
MIFTer spirit to the Laugh Floor.

(CHUCKLES)

So, uh, work buds.

Work buds.

(SNIFFLING)

Go make 'em laugh, Tylor.

- (KID LAUGHING)
- (DINGS)

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

FRITZ: It's over?

Sad sigh.

Anybody know if there's a season two?
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