05x10 - The 7th Is Made Up of Phantoms

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Twilight Zone". Aired: October 1959 to June 1964.*
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Collection of fantasy and suspenseful stories.
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05x10 - The 7th Is Made Up of Phantoms

Post by bunniefuu »

You unlock this door with the key of imagination.

Beyond it is another dimension.

A dimension of sound.

A dimension of sight. A dimension of mind.

You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas.

You've just crossed over into the twilight zone.

Still burning.

How long, you figure?

Three, four hours at the most.

Any idea how many?

My guess is if general custer's really looking for the Sioux, he's gonna have his britches full of 'em before the sun goes down.

Is that the junction over there?

Bighorn and the little bighorn. That's where they converge.

That'd put them in at the ford, about four miles up.

That's where he's thinking about crossing.

Them Sioux. Wonder where they are now.

I wouldn't be too impatient, mr. Two stripes.

We can go on back and tell your general Custer this Indian trail is just as fresh as ever.

Little too fresh for my pay.

Hey, those were sh*ts, weren't they?

Yeah.

Hey, tiger! Whoa, easy. These are just maneuvers.

Everybody starts getting trigger-happy, it's gonna turn into a real w*r.

Hunting season, huh, maybe?

How about that, McCluskey? How'd you like to go hunting some buffalo?

Let's, uh, go have a look.

Well, if it's the enemy, I'm giving up.

They can take me prisoner of w*r, and I'll sit out the rest of the games.

I'm getting mighty hot in that portable oven we're driving.

McCluskey, I'm surprised at you.

The old man, the sergeant here, we've had our eyes on you, son.

We was thinking of recommending you for o.c.s., wasn't we, sarge?

Other than the fact that you read a map upside down and, uh, couldn't navigate a plow across a ballroom, we think you've got a lot of potential.

It's a wigwam. An honest-to-Pete wigwam.

Oh, there's a million men in national guard, but it's just my luck to ride around in a t*nk with the last of the red-hot eagle scouts.

You're right, McCluskey, that's a wigwam.

Now, why does that make you so happy?

Well, it's interesting.

Right over there's the junction of the bighorn and little bighorn rivers.

Not far from there is where Custer fought.

Yeah, Custer? Custer who?

General Custer. That's where the 7th cavalry fought the Sioux Indians.

Hey, take a look at that.

Hey, where'd you get that?

Seventh cavalry. How do you figure, sarge?

Well, I figure it's in pretty good shape, considering it's been laying around here for about 80 years, wouldn't you say?

You know, there must be a lot of ghosts running around a place like this.

Oh, yeah, ghosts, sure, mm-hm.

Yeah, mccluskey's got it right.

Somewhere along this river they fought a pretty big battle.

Custer and 200-odd men against 2,000 Sioux, probably.

Yeah, custer's last stand. Didn't you ever hear of it, langsford?

I-I heard of it, McCluskey. I heard of it.

Why don't you boys get you a job in a museum?

Maybe they'd send you out here on an expedition and pick up some antiques.

I thought this was supposed to be a motorized patrol, sarge, and I thought that we were supposed to be involved in some w*r games.

Personally, I don't care. I'd just as soon be out reconnoitering in some dark saloon someplace or, uh, maybe hanging around the y.w.c.a.

In a pinch, I'd settle for something tall and cold and...

Do-don't you think we'd better get back and find the c.p.?

sh**t, what's the matter, McCluskey?

Don't you want to hang around and wait for the union cavalry, huh?

So, this is where they fought, huh, sarge? Right around here?

Yeah, yeah, it was around here someplace.

You know, when I was a kid, I read about everything that was ever written on it.

Custer and the seventh were an advance guard for a general named terry.

The last thing anybody ever heard from Custer was that he was dividing his regiment into three parties.

He was planning on surrounding what he thought was a small bunch of Indians.

And, uh, see, captain benteen took three troops and he went south.

And major Reno, he crossed the river and he followed an Indian trail.

And Custer went right up the middle, and rode right into 'em and he was slaughtered.

1876. That was the year.

Ah, now, come on, now, sarge. Somebody planted this thing around here for a gag.

That canteen's not 80 years old.

Well, sh**t, it's practically new.

Either that, or, uh, we've had some...

Come on, let's get out of here.

Come on, you guys. Let's get back to the t*nk.

What was that?

That was the wind.

Yeah. The wind.

Yeah, that's what it was, the wind.

June 25, 1964.

Or if you prefer, June 25, 1876.

The cast of characters in order of their appearance:

A patrol of general custer's cavalry and a patrol of national guardsmen on a maneuver.

Past and present are about to collide head-on as they are wont to do in a very special bivouac area known as the twilight zone.

All units reported in now, Finnegan?

Yes, lieutenant.

Good.

Bluebird 7, come in, over. Bluebird.

Connors, the captain wants to see you in his tent right away, and it sounded like to me it was a little more than an invitation.

Captain?

How nice of you to come back.

Did you happen to bring the t*nk with you? You were gone so long, I thought maybe you drove it out to a lot and traded it for a convertible.

Well, sir, we got a little, uh, hung up down by the riverbed there.

Hung up by what? The blue team went north of us, you went south.

For a guy with as much regular army as you've got, you've played this one bonehead from start to finish.

If there'd been an umpire around, you'd have your t*nk crossed off and your men.

I'm sorry, sir, but we heard some r*fle fire down there and we went to check it out.

r*fle fire? According to the lieutenant, you were down at the little bighorn, forty miles away from where you were supposed to be. How'd you hear r*fle fire?

That's just it, sir. We never found out where it came from or who it came from.

I think you guys must have had a bottle in that t*nk.

Tomorrow you'll take your t*nk and head up here, rosebud creek.

Follow the creek for about 15 miles.

We figure the blue team must've moved across to...

What's the matter with you, Connors? Are you hung over?

No, sir. No, sir, nothing like that at all, sir.

But that rosebud creek, that's custer's route.

When he left the Yellowstone river, he went with a major Reno, and Reno followed a trail along that creek.

Sergeant, let's synchronize, shall we?

My watch says 23:20 hours. My calendar says 1964.

If you've got a big thing for these Indians, you got here a little late in the day.

Captain, I want to tell you we heard "em! Indians! Their w*r cries!

Where? When?

This afternoon, sir, at the junction of the bighorn and the little bighorn.

Captain, now, I know this sounds crazy.

Believe me, I know it. But we found a canteen...

Well, I must have left it in the t*nk, sir.

That canteen is marked seventh cavalry. And we found a tepee close to the river.

A tepee? Are you bucking for a section eight, sergeant?

That's the same tepee that reno's scouts found the night before the battle!

Reno's scouts, huh? Reno being?

Major Reno. When Custer split his force into three columns he sent Reno's to the north...

All right, Connors, that'll do. Line up your patrol and head out at 0600 tomorrow morning.

And if you meet any Indians, if you meet Indians, will you take it very slow?

Because they're all college graduates and they're probably running tests on the soil.

Where to now, sarge?

Well, we'll, uh, we'll follow this trail about two, three more miles.

That's reno's route.

Yeah.

For pete's sakes. Are you guys still on that?

It's Reno this, benteen that, Custer something else.

I don't know what's the matter with you. You talk about it all night.

Hey!

Hey, wait a minute. Hold on, now, wait a minute.

That's an incinerator, or it's somebody cooking a steak or something, or it's some tourists that don't dig smokey the bear. Will you guys knock it off?

It figures. It has to.

Reno's scouts found the tepee the night before the battle, and the following morning, the column saw smoke signals.

And late that morning, they got their first Indian.

When the w*r party went by, one of their troopers sh*t the last rider.

Aw, will you stop it?

Come on, now, I can take a joke just like anybody else, but this is too much, man. I'm telling you, this is too much.

You're going to tell me that somewhere around that bend we're going to run into a w*r party of Sioux!

I'm telling you if that happens, I'm checking myself in with the medics, man, for the rubber room.

But I wanna make a reservation for three, you understand me?

McCluskey, you moron! Kid, what are you sh**ting at?

Give me that...

McCluskey, look!

Oh, my dear god.

An Indian horse without a rider.

I k*lled him. Sergeant, I just fired blind into that dust cloud, but...

All right, langsford, you, uh, you got something to say, well, why don't you say it?

No, sarge.

I got something to ask.

I'd like to know what's going on around here.

I don't know. I don't know for sure.

But I got an idea. Somehow, some way, we're following the same trail that Custer did.

Look, let's figure it out.

Now, first, the tepee. Now, when did we find it? Yesterday afternoon, right?

Just like the scout did before.

And the smoke signals, just like reno's column saw the next morning.

McCluskey, he gets himself an Indian, just...

Just like on the day of the battle.

All right, Connors.

Okay, let's say-let's say that you're right.

Let's say that this thing is happening, just like you said it is.

Let's say that we're gonna follow this trail just like, uh, well, just like they did it, huh?

Now, what I wanna know is what's gonna happen next?

We're gonna wind up at a m*ssacre.

That's what.

You gonna stop it?

Yeah, stop it, or join it.

Finnegan? Has Connors reported in?

Not yet, sir.

Get him.

Yes, sir.

Bluebird nine? Bluebird nine. This is c.p.

Bluebird nine, blue bird nine, over.

This is bluebird nine, go ahead, c.p.

They're acknowledging, sir.

Connors? This is the captain.

This is McCluskey, sir.


McCluskey? Do you think you guys might extend yourselves a bit and give me your position?

We're about four miles down rosebud creek. We're about to cross over.

You're about to come back here on the double. You're about to report to me personally.

You're about to do it within the next half-hour or you'll be spending the next three national holidays in the guardhouse, read me?

Yes, sir, just a minute. Here's sergeant Connors.

Captain, this is Connors.

Connors, do I have to send a couple of m.p.s down there?

Captain, look, we're just a mile from where major Reno met the Sioux!

Listen to me, Connors. I'm going to give this to you just once.

When these maneuvers are over, you can come back here on a vacation and dig arrowheads, or anything you like.

But right now, I want a government-issue t*nk back here at the command post with three national guardsmen named Connors, McCluskey and langsford right alongside it.

Now, you've got exactly 30 minutes to bring her back here. Acknowledge!

Connors, acknowledge! Connors!

He's broken off, sir.

Lieutenant!

Take a jeep and three men down rosebud crick.

Just follow the tread marks, and bring 'em back.

What if they resist?

I'll tell you what you do, lieutenant.

First apologize to them, then sh**t each one in the leg. Now, do you read me?

All right, let's move out.

Nothing.

Nothing and no one. And right down there is where Reno had his battle.

Well, you guys better manufacture a couple of Indians in a hurry.

Because, uh, I know a national guards captain that's probably on his way here with a net!

Where are they, sarge? How come we missed out?

How come we missed out? You want an explanation?

We missed out because we're looking for dead cavalry, buried Indians, and an 80-year-old battle.

That's why we missed out.

I've been doing some thinking about this thing, see, and I got it figured out.

This whole thing is strictly an illusion. That's the goods. It's an illusion!

We've talked ourselves into a stinking illusion.

No, that's not it. That's not it at all.

McCluskey, do you remember what it was that Reno found before the battle?

He even sent a message back to Custer about it.

Sure, the village.

What village? What village?

What do I have to tell you guys to straighten you out, huh? Tell me.

Reno's scouts found an Indian village, and it was an hour after that that the whole troop went into action.

Aw, man, my aching back. I swear, I give up.

I give up!

This is where the men separate from the nutsies.

Where're you going?

I'm going to cut back to c.p., if I can find it.

But don't worry, boys. I'm gonna send you a padded ambulance.

Arrivederci. You all!

It's the village.

That's a mirage, is it, langsford?

It's not really there, is it?

I don't know, man, don't ask me anything. Don't-don't ask me nothing.

I'll go down and scout it.

You know, an hour ago if he'd said that, I'd have laughed at him or shut him up, but now I don't know.

Just be careful, McCluskey.

All right, what happens now, sergeant?

I mean, what happens next?

Beyond the village is where benteen engages.

Well, I mean, uh, what about Custer?

He loses a right arm.

And as of the moment Reno got cut off back there, custer's column was doomed.

Man, this is wild. I mean, you know, this is really wild. It's, uh...

It's like chasing history.

It's like chasing history and trying to change it.

Yeah.

Connors? Langsford?

If it's a mirage, it sure went the route.

Kid, you all right?

What's the matter?

I just seen the granddaddy of all mirages.

This one's sticking out of my back.

Bluebird nine, bluebird nine. This is c.p. Come in, bluebird nine.

Captain.

You'd better tell me they're just a few hundred yards behind you.

I can't tell you that, sir.

You'd better be telling me something else, like the whereabouts of an m-4 t*nk.

We found the t*nk, sir. And this was on it.

"crossing rosebud creek. Trying to reach seventh cavalry.

Have to."

I don't get it.

I swear I don't get it.

What's he mean by the seventh cavalry, captain?

Who's the seventh cavalry?

It's Avery hot outfit headed up by a tiger by the name of George Custer.

And don't ask me any more ‘cause I wouldn't be able to tell you.

Come on, just hang on now. We're gonna to make it. Just hang on.

I'll make it all right.

Just a few hundred more feet, that's all. They're right over that ridge.

Come on.

All right, fellows. Let's do it!

There's no sign of the men on either side, captain.

The t*nk's up there on the ridge, but there's no sign of the men. No sign at all.

Keep looking.

Yes, sir.

Put them on report, sir?

Put 'em on report.

Captain!

"William Connors, Michael McCluskey, Richard langsford."

Kind of a coincidence, sir?

Quite a coincidence.

Too bad they couldn't have brought the t*nk up. It would have helped.

Beg pardon, sir?

Nothing, lieutenant.

I didn't say anything.

Sergeant William Connors, trooper Michael McCluskey, and trooper Richard langsford who on a hot afternoon in June made a charge over a hill and never returned.

Look for this one under "p" for phantom in a historical ledger located in a reading room known as the twilight zone.

And now, Mr. Serling.

No one likes to age, but it's a natural process like death and taxes and the weather.

But next time on twilight zone, we tell the story about what happens when a certain man doesn't age.

As a matter of fact, he grows younger.

Patrick O'neal stars in a short drink from a certain fountain.

Now, if this one doesn't pull you up by the shoulders, I don't think anything will.

I hope we see you next time.
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