01x11 - Wesley Jr.

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Gabby Duran & the Unsittables". Aired: October 2019 - present.*
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Gabby finds herself babysitting extraterrestrial children who are hiding out on Earth and vows to protect their secret.
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01x11 - Wesley Jr.

Post by bunniefuu »

♪♪

And why are you watching an egg?

It's some kind
of alien pet, I guess.

The owners are on vacation
in another galaxy,

predpolaga se e trqbva da predpoloja on it for the next couple weeks.

But don't get too excited,

it's not supposed to hatch
or anything until they get back.

(egg cracking)

- Oh, no.
- Oh, yes!

Witnessing an alien birth?

This is so high
on my bucket list!

Come on, little guy!
You can do it!

Push! Push!

(squawking)

Wow.

The miracle of life is...

(trills)

super ugly.

Don't listen to her, buddy.
You're adorable!

I'm gonna name you Wesley Jr.

(theme song playing)

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ I do normal like a fish
rides a bicycle ♪


♪ Fit in like summer
and an icicle ♪


♪ Don't fight it,
just be an original ♪


♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ I roller skate
outside the lines ♪


♪ When I try to stay in,
it's no surprise ♪


♪ It's a fail, it's okay,
I'm one of a kind ♪


♪ One of a, one of a kind ♪

♪ So anytime I feel
some type of way ♪


♪ Don't understand
the human race ♪


♪ So what, so what, so what ♪

♪ I do my thing,
I do my thing ♪


♪ You do your thing,
You do your thing ♪


♪ When we don't fit in ♪

♪ We stand out in the crowd
and we shout it loud ♪


♪ I do my thing,
I do my thing ♪


♪ I'm the one and only,
I'm the one and only ♪


♪ Don't try to fit in,
Don't try to fit in ♪


♪ Mm-hmm, I do my thing ♪

(squawking)

Gabby: Hey, buddy,
who's your favorite baby-sitter.

(pulsing)

Whoa, what was that?

I'm not sure,
but I have an idea.

Try petting him.

Oh-Kay...

(pulsing, rumbling)

Yup, just like I thought.

It looks like Wesley Jr. emits
strong vibrational energy

when he gets upset.

Don't you, guy?

(cooing)

Alien earthquake bird?

I guess we gotta
keep it happy then!

Also... how dare you like
Wesley more than me! (Scoffs)

(cooing)

♪♪

♪ The night is
all about you ♪


♪ Just go on
and have what you want ♪


♪ And do anything
that you'd like to ♪


♪ Oh, you don't even have
to stop, no ♪


♪ Set the world on fire... ♪

(pulsing, rumbling)

♪ So do whatever you like
It's your right... ♪


(pulsing, rumbling stops)

♪ You got the stars
in your eyes ♪


♪ Let them shine ♪

♪ And set the world on fire ♪

♪ Light up the sky ♪

(snoring softly)

All right, a little shading
on the beak there.

Oh, that's nice.

- Wesley, you have outdone yourself.
- (door opens)

(door closes)

(sighs)

I don't know what's worse:

Getting puked on
by an alien bird

or having to wear this shirt.

- What you working on?
- Check it out.

I've been working
on a field journal

with everything we've learned
so far about aliens.

Oh-Kay.

You realize we have
to burn this, right?

What? No! Why?

Because this alien stuff
is top secret, Wes!

What if someone found this?

Or what if Swift found out
I told you?

I could lose my job!

Is this all there is?

Yes and no.

Yes, this is all there is
of this journal.

Wes...

There's... two more.

(music playing on laptop)

I do not get it.

- You don't get what?
- Nothing.

Just a guy on the street saw me
and said he didn't like

my Dina Duran human interest
segments on the news.

Who cares what he thinks?
It's just one guy, right?

Well... when I said,
"On the street,"

I meant, "In my office."
And when I said, "One guy,"

- I really meant, "My boss."
- Olivia: Oh.

- That's bad.
- Dina: Yeah.

The ratings for my segments
haven't been great.

And if I can't figure out
why my feel-good pieces

are making people feel bad,
I might get cancelled.

Ooh! Can I help?

I love solving work problems.

They're so much weightier

and more complex
than school problems.

Actually, I could really use
an outside opinion.

Yes! I hope you're ready

for some
loving-but-honest criticism!

Okay.

Trust me...

this is for the best.

Do we have to?

I put a lot of work into these.

Every alien experience,
every story you ever told me...

All the more reason
we have to get rid of it!

Now where are
your matches? Huh?

Nope. Can't do it.

Hey! Give me those!

- I won't show anyone!
- I can't risk it!

You're forgetting:
I'm a little bigger than you.

You're forgetting:
I fight dirty.

Whoa!

- (screaming)
- (Wesley grunting)

- Give me those!
- No!

They're my journals!

(both grunting)

I'm the one who babysits aliens,
it's my decision!

Stop freaking out!

No one's gonna find out!

Man: Find out about what?

Hey. Mr. and Mrs.,
uh, Wesley's parents.

There you are!

What happened with your parents?

Bah! Don't worry
about it.

My parents don't think
the aliens are real.

But they do think
that I think they're real.

So I've got an appointment with

the school guidance counselor
this afternoon

to discuss
my "cry for help."

Wes, this is bad.

I know.

Terry keeps a big bowl
of butterscotch candies

on his desk, and I have,
like, zero self-control...

No! Now another person
is gonna see the journal!

You really screwed this up!

Me? This is your fault,
you know!

No one would have found anything

if you hadn't tried to make me
destroy my life's work.

Well, then you shouldn't have been
keeping journals in the first place!

You know what?

I'm starting to think you
shouldn't help me babysit anymore.

Well, you know what?

I'm starting to think I shouldn't
help you babysit anymore!

- I just said that!
- I just said that!

Wesley Jr. likes me
more than you.

(gasps)

How dare you!

Your parents are very worried.

And looking at
some of these pages,

I'd have to agree.

These images are...

somewhat disturbing.

They are?

Just in the drawing skill.

You're . You really
should be a better artist.

So, Wesley.

These "Gor-Mons" you imagine.
Do they talk to you or...

What?

No, they don't talk to me.
It's all make-believe.

Kinda like your own
imaginary fantasy world.

Exactly!

Well, I can relate to that.

I, too, enjoy
the world of pretend.

Only for me, it's a vaguely
medieval realm

where I'm called Prince Terry

and I rule a kingdom
of centaurs.

You know, people-horses?

(horse neighs)

Cool.

(gasping)

Terry: Wesley,
you seem just fine to me.

I see no reason why we need to...

Okay, Terry,
I'll take over from here.

Principal Swift.
This isn't your jurisdiction.

I was just dismissing
young Wesley here...

And I was just remembering

when you and your
dress-up buddies

used the school gymnasium

for an unauthorized
people-horse battle.

(horse neighs)

Good luck to you!

(ominous music plays)

(breathing heavily)

So, Wesley.

- Let's talk, shall we?
- Wesley: Sure.

Hey, here's a topic:

You ever notice how "flammable"

and "inflammable"
mean the same thing?

That's weird.
(chuckles nervously)

Here's another topic:

Aliens and what you know
about them.

(swallows audibly)

Dina: (on laptop) So if
you need a new cat groomer,


you paws-itively can't go wrong.

For Local , I'm Dina Duran.

And the ball's in your court.

So if you're looking
for a fun afternoon,


park yourself at the park.

For Local , I'm Dina Duran.

And the ball's in your court.

So it turns out the smell
was just a lot of squirrels.


For Local , I'm Dina Duran.
And the ball's in your court.


See?
Look, they're great!

- Uh, no.
- No?

"The ball's in your court"?
What ball? Whose court?

I say this with
all the love I can:

That's straight trash.

Okay.
So it's the sign-off.

Okay, mija. We have to
come up with something new.

Um... how about this?

I'm Dina Duran.
And that's the ticket.

I thought you were going
to take this seriously.

(sighs)

"Everything's fine,

Terry's got butterscotch."

It's like he's trying
to get me found...

(squawking)

out.

Whoa.

Wesley Jr.?

- (squawks)
- You grew up quick.

(thud)

(crashes)

Hey, would you cool it?

The neighbors are gonna complain
and then what am I gonna say?

(squawking, pulsing)

Okay, let's just, uh,
find something you like.

You like songs?

(clears throat)

♪ Go to sleep, giant bird ♪

♪ And stop shaking the house ♪

(screeches)

I liked you so much better
when you were an egg.

You weren't like this yesterday
for me and Wes...

You miss Wes.

Where did you get your info

for this journal of yours?

I don't know what
you're talking about.

I think you do.

And we're not leaving
this school

until you tell me.

I have got all day.

My life is quite... empty.

Shall we begin?

Okay, Wesley.

It's been an hour.

Let's up the ante, shall we?

(chuckles)

Don't mind me,
I'm just going to set down

this steaming hot plate
of fettuccine Alfredo.

I'm not hungry.

I just had a bunch
of butterscotches.

It's not for you.

It's for me.

To eat in front of you,

slowly... and loudly.

Mmm.

(slurps)
Mmm...

Oh! Mmm.

Mmm, mmm, mmm.

You're a monster.

Just tell me what you know,

and all of this goes away.

(evil laughter)

- (pulsing)
- Hey, little guy.

I'm your buddy, Wesley.

Look, I'm wearing my coat.

Remember what great pals we are?

Why don't you just sit down
and we'll figure out how to...

(screeches)

Okay, fine. I'm not Wesley.
I know that!

But Wesley did a very dumb thing
and so he can't be here anymore!

So, sorry, but he
isn't coming! All right?

So just chill the heck out!

- (screeching)
- (pulsing, rumbling)

- (glass shattering)
- (gasping)

(pulsing, rumbling continue)

(screeching)

I'm sorry I yelled at you,

but will you just stop already?

Ah!

I've got to get Wesley.


She clearly told you something.

If you want to save yourself,

just tell me
what Gabby told you,

and you can go home.

I don't think I know any Gabbys.

(sighs)

Also, you have a bit
of Alfredo sauce

on your jacket there.

Guh! Ooh!

I had hoped

I wouldn't have
to resort to this...

Please tell me, Wesley!

I just really need you
to tell me what you know!

(crying)

Come on, it'll be okay.

Why can't I break you?
You're a child!

(continues crying)

(sighs)

Well, that's just perfect.

Okay, yes!
Wesley obviously told you

all about how he's been
helping me babysit aliens.

And now you're crying
because you trusted me

and I betrayed that trust.

I get it. But right now,
we've got bigger problems.

He's been what?

I didn't tell him anything.

Wait. You didn't?

He didn't.

I ate a big plate

of fettuccine Alfredo
for nothing.

But now that I know...

There'll be plenty of time
for you to yell at me later.

But right now, we've got
an alien earthquake bird

that's about to level
a neighborhood.

Wesley Jr. won't calm down,

and I know you're probably
the only person he'll listen to.

Will you help me?

For Wesley Jr.?

Let's ride.

No.

Let's fly.

I'm Dina Duran,
your number one fan!

And boom goes the Dina-mite!

That's what's for Dina.

I'm your fave-ensburg
in Havensburg.

A.K.A. the Duran-tula.

(rips paper)

- (rumbling)
- (car alarm blaring)

(squawking)

(pulsing, rumbling continue)

Oh!

- (Gabby screams)
- It's worse than I thought.

This, combined with
many other valid reasons,

is why I hate birds!

(screeching)

See if it'll listen to you!

Hey there, buddy!
It's me, your papa!

Probably not the time,

but it's super creepy
that you call yourself that!

(screeching)

How about some funny faces?

Brr! Brr!

Step aside.

I'll establish dominance.

Caw caw!

- (screeching continues)
- Caw caw!

Caw caw!

(all gasp)

- (Swift grunts)
- (Gabby screams)

We need to find cover!

Wesley:
Come on.

Gabby: Quick!
Into the bathroom.

(screeching)

(screams)

Sorry, Mom.

We tried.

Or I tried at least.

Oh well... (sighs)
I guess I'm stuck

with the world's worst sign-off.

(rumbling)

Whoa, what's that shaking?

(angelic music plays)

I'm Dina Duran...

Both:
And that's what's shakin'!

Yes!

It's quippy, it's fun,

and it doesn't make me
embarrassed to be your daughter!

Yeah, it's the perfect sign-off!

Where's Gabby? She's definitely
gonna want to hear about this!

- (rumbling continues)
- (Swift whimpering)

Any ideas?

Wait... your journal!

Maybe there's something
in there!

Where is it?

I may have left it at school.

Ha!

(grunts) Ha!

(rumbling)

The centaurs are coming!

The herd is nigh!

Ah!

(both gasp)

Wesley, I don't want
to go out like this.

Not while we're still arguing.

Me neither.

I'm sorry about the journals!

I just wanted to be
a part of all this!

I'm sorry, too.
I shouldn't have made you feel bad.

Yeah, I know
it was silly, but...

this job isn't half
as fun without you!

(rumbling stops)

Wait. What happened?

We were hugging,
and then it just stopped.

(squawks)

(both sigh)

Ooh.

It appears this is
a Va'taxian Vibra-Bird.

An alien species that responds

to the emotional vibrations
of those around them.

They left
very detailed instructions

which you obviously never read.

I skimmed!

Responds to
emotional vibrations...

So when we were fighting
with each other,

it was angry.

And it calmed down
when we made up.

That makes perfect sense!

And, hey, everyone's happy now.

Everyone is not happy.

But in the interests of avoiding
another bird-quake...

(snoring softly)

perhaps we should postpone
this conversation.

Of all the nonsense
I've put up with from you,

this has to be the most
aggressively irresponsible!

You were expressly forbidden

from revealing the secret
of alien existence.

- I know, and...
- Do not interrupt me.

You gave me your word.

And then you told Wesley anyway.

So you've left me
with no choice.

Wesley, I must wipe your mind.

Swifty, you can't!

I'm ready.

Just leave me my fifth birthday!

Oh, I was just bluffing.

We don't have
mind-wipe technology.

This is just a box
I keep interesting stones in.

Gabby: Is that a tooth?

But I am still very upset!

We get that.
And believe me...

We're both going
to guard this secret

like our lives depended on it.

Totally.

See that you do.

This is so awesome!

The aliens of Havensburg
are counting on us, Gabby!

Us!

Gah, I just wanna shove,
like, a whole bowl

of butterscotches in my mouth!

I know, right?

And somehow,
with the journal stuff

and the earthquake
space chicken,

no one else found out!

"I know your secret."

Oh, come on!

Principal Swift: Next time on
Gabby Duran and the Unsittables...

Gabby: What if someone
really does know that

aliens live here
and it's all my fault?

Definitely panic time.

Swift: You put all your
alien friends in danger!


Now they're messing
with my family.

Nothing weird's happening.

(theme music playing)

Man:
Gorgeous!
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