02x15 - My Best Friends' Ending

[bunniefuu]

OK. Something phone.

They'll never get this.

Wait a second! Pirate.

Arrr, ear.

Rear! Rear phone! Butt phone!

-I mean, butt-dial!
-Yes!

Wow, that was amazing.

What can I say?

Two people, one mind.

OK, our turn.

-Kelly Clarkson!
-Bam!

Whoa. How'd you get
Kelly Clarkson off a dot?

At her concert during our th birthdays,
there was a guy with a laser pointer.

And he was being really annoying
during the finale.

Three security guards kicked him out.

That's amazing. You guys make Syd and I
look like we don't even know each other.

Hey, guys, let's lock in
this friendship moment with a selfie!

All: Four Amigas!

And an Amigo!

-Dad.
-What?

I thought photobombing was cool.

Aw, it's so cute that
you think that, Mr. R.

Check it.

We're already raking in the likes.

And a comment!

JillIsChill just posted,

"Cute pic, Soph.
Loved hanging with you yesterday."

Wait, yesterday?

Yesterday was my aerial arts show.

You said you couldn't come
because you were sick.

Uh...

And who is JillIsChill ?

She's a camp friend.

She was in town, and it was
the only night I could see her.

So you lied to me?

You know what isn't a lie?
How much fun this game is.

Yeah, the funnest!

You guys go.

It's the first show
I've missed in two years.

It doesn't matter. You still lied.

OK, we'll go.

I had to lie to you. If I had
told you the truth, you'd flip out.

Flip out? I never flip out!

I've never flipped out
in my whole entire life!

-I'm leaving.
-No, I'm leaving.

OK, guys, come on.
It's just a little misunderstanding.

Stay! We'll have...

-(door slams)
-...fun.

Who wants sundaes?

I'm eating four sundaes, aren't I?

(theme music playing)

♪ Do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Like father, like daughter
We don't always agree ♪

♪ But looking at you
Is like looking at me ♪

♪ The more things change
The more they stay the same ♪

♪ Like father like daughter
From different times ♪

♪ Taking all the best
From your decade and mine ♪

♪ The more things change ♪

♪ The more they stay the same ♪

♪ Do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do ♪

♪ The more they stay the same ♪

Whoa! Bucky just walked in wearing--

-Sky Johnsons!
-(angelic music playing)

Those are the flyest
basketball shoes in the world.

They even make Bucky look cool.

Bucky.

Hey, Bucky, sweet kicks.

-Thanks.
-Can we touch them?

-Did you wash your hands?
-Today?

I'll touch them for both of us.

I'll never forget this moment

-as long as--
-OK, that's enough.

Leo, I need those sneakers.

I know. Those were shoes.

These are random strips of leather
pretending to be shoes.

That's right. I'm talking about you.

What are we gonna do?
They cost a hundred bucks.

-I don't have that kind of money.
-Well, most of my money's in the bank.

Retirement's gonna be here
sooner than you think.

Have you heard from Emmy and Sophia?

They got pretty intense.
I had a hard time getting sleep.

Although that could have been
the four sundaes.

Dad, don't worry about it.

They've never stayed mad at each other
for more than a day.

Yeah, they're Emmy and Sophia,

the Dynamic Duo, the Cute-Some Two-Some,

the Zesty Besties.

I'm still working on that last one.

Well, I'm glad to hear that.

And don't give up on "Zesty Besties."
There's something there.

-Hey, ladies.
-Whoa.

Aren't you kids
supposed to be in "school"?

Yeah, that's him.

This is my crew from my psychology class.

The place we always study at closed,
so this is our new hang.

Gee, thanks, Mom.
Nice of you to think of me.

Please, make yourselves at home.

So, what can I get you guys?

We've smoothies,
veggie wraps, avocado toast.

-Five ice waters, please.
-You got it. And what else?

Thanks?

Hey, guys! Happy Saturday!

Emmy. Hi! How are... things?

Things are great.
I'm just gonna go grab a drink. BRB.

I knew they'd be over it already.
They're the best best friends ever.

Hey, ladies! What's...

she doing here?

She's wondering what she's doing here.

Emmy, Sophia, why don't we just sit down
and talk this through?

I mean, disagreements
between friends happen.

I wouldn't even call it a disagreement.
It's a tiff. You're tiffing.

You know what? Let's put it all out there.

Emmy, you're upset that Sophia
didn't come to your aerial art show.

-She lied!
-OK, let's put a little less out there.

And, Sophia, you're upset because you felt
pressure to go to Emmy's aerial arts show.

Pressure? She programs her shows
into my calendar, with ten reminders.

-(cell phone chimes)
-I don't even have to look.

Guys, are you really
gonna let this one little thing

get in the way of a friendship
that you've had since preschool?

Well, now that you say that,
it's not just one thing.

She's always been demanding.

In fourth grade,
I wanted to take orchestra,

but Emmy made me join choir.

Wow. You told me you liked choir.
Was that just another lie?

Syd, do something!

Uh... But... Er...

I'm running out of sounds.

You know what?

If I'm so demanding,
why don't I unfollow you?

Then I'm unfollowing you.

Don't do something you'll regret.

If a friendship doesn't exist online,
it doesn't exist.

-Well, then I guess it doesn't exist.
-(phone beeps)

-Fine by me.
-(phone beeps)

Mom...

my shoes are k*lling me.

They're too tight!

So soon?

That's what I get for feeding you.

I need new shoes.

And if it's all the same to you,

I'm really leaning towards
these Sky Johnsons.

A hundred dollars? (chuckles)

Not unless they come with $
stuffed inside them.

I thought you might say that.

But what if I said you could make this
my next three birthday presents?

Max, you already used your
next three birthdays on that model rocket.

And the five after that on the window
you broke with the new model rocket.

I'm basically covered 'til you're .

(knock on door)

-Any luck with your parents?
-Nope.

My dad gave me the...

"When I was your age
I was lucky to have shoes" speech.

Which is a lie,
his father owned a shoe store.

Well, I'm not giving up.

I've got to get those shoes, Leo.

I've got bucks.
Do you think they'd sell me one shoe?

Wait, Max. I've got bucks too.
Do you know what that means?

They might sell you one too?

Or... we could buy one pair together
and share them.

-We are the same size.
-How do you know that?

Please. My grandfather owned a shoe store.

Mom?

You have been here
for two days and haven't bought a thing.

Any chance you could,
I don't know, buy something?

Max, we're college students.

We've invested all our money
in our future.

And replacing phone screens.
I dropped, like, three this week.

Well, then I am going
to need to get tough.

Would you please ask them to leave?

Me? I don't own the place.

And if I did, I'd do a complete remodel,
starting with you.

You do it.

But I don't want to be that guy.
I want to be this guy.

Everybody cool?

All right, cool.

This is horrible.

Emmy and Sophia can't break up.
They did everything together.

Yeah. They bought clothes together.
They got braces together.

They didn't wear their retainers
and had to get braces again together.

(gasps) Oh, no.
What are they gonna do for Halloween?

They've always gone as a pair.

You're right. Last year they went as Zoey
and Claire from Werewolf Girlfriend.

(gasps) Werewolf Girlfriend.
We always watch it with them.

And it's on tonight. What are we gonna do?
We can't have them both over.

And these kind of things
are gonna keep coming up.

Let's face it, we're fun people.

We just need a fair system
so that we can hang with one at a time.

You think Emmy and Sophia
will go for that?

Totally. As long as we don't tell them.

What if we switch off every other day?

That's greeat.
Instead of being The Four Amigas,

we'll be The Two Amigas
and Two Every-Other-Day Amigas.

It just rolls off the tongue!

That's right,

you're feelin' me.

OK, dude. Time for the handoff.

Now, I put together this bag
of shoe-care products.

There's wipes, a shine kit,
and plastic shoe covers

for rainy days.

Well, actually,
they're my mom's shower caps.

Thanks, dude.
But I'm going to the skate park,

not playing bingo in an old folks home.

Skate park? You can't skate in these!

Um, they're athletic shoes.

-That's what they're made for.
-No, no, no.

These are works of art.

Would you skate in a Picasso?

If he made sneakers.

I'm so excited for Werewolf Girlfriend!

I bet Zoey finally tells her prom date
that she's a werewolf.

Yeah. How does he still not know?

He caught her howling at the moon
and eating a live rabbit.

OK, guys. I've finally caught up
on all episodes of your show.

So how about Dad gets to watch it
with you tonight?

Wow, I'm impressed.

Man, that twist with
Daryl and Monica was crazy.

Uh, Dad, you watched the wrong show.

That's not Werewolf Girlfriend,
that's Vampire Boyfriend.

What? But...

I'll be in my room.

(knock at door)

Who's ready to watch
a werewolf go to prom?

(howls)

-I am.
-Me too.

Oh. Hi, Emmy.

You OK, Olive?

Yes. Of course. So OK.

Hey, you know what we should do?
Watch upstairs in Syd's room.

It'll be darker, scarier,

upstairs-ier.

I'm not sure I want it to be scarier.

Sure you do. Here, take these snacks,
and we'll be right up.

OK, I'll be checking under the bed.
If you hear me scream, come up.

And if you hear silence, also come up.

Why are you acting so weird?

I invited Sophia to come over.
She'll be here any second.

Olive, what happened
to our every-other-day schedule?

We agreed we'd start the week with Emmy.

Yes, and tomorrow's the start of the week.

-Monday.
-Not on my calendar.

The week starts tonight. Sunday.

What are you talking about?
Sunday is part of the weekend.

Week-end. It's right there in the name.

Olive, we're wasting time.
We have to stop Sophia from coming over.

-(knock at door)
-Too late.

I wish we had more time to fix this.

Well, on my calendar, we had one more day.

We'll just have to tell her
that something came up.

Who's ready to watch werewolves kiss?

(howls)

-Actually, Sophia--
-I know.

This hasn't been easy on you guys.

But I'm so grateful you invited me over.

I'd hate being home alone,

knowing you guys
are having fun without me.

Well, then, let's watch
some Werewolf Girlfriend.

Right, Olive?

(howls, yelps)

This is a disaster. What if Emmy
and Sophia find out they're both here?

Look, we just need to keep them apart
for one hour.

I'll go upstairs and be with Emmy,
and you stay down here with Sophia.

Great. But what happens
when Emmy asks where I am?

I'll text you that we need more snacks
and then you'll come up.

Wait, but we can't leave Sophia alone.

-Hi, girls.
-Problem solved.

Hey, Dad, when I text you,
go watch Werewolf Girlfriend with Sophia.

I have no idea what's going on.
But let's do this!

-What a great plan.
-It's brilliant.

Sydney: OK.

(both scream)

-What is she doing here?
-What is she doing here?

What am I doing here?

Look, guys,
we didn't mean to have you both here,

we just had a little scheduling mix-up.

By the way, you guys consider Monday
the first day of the week, right?

Olive.

Sorry. But you can't be friends with me
if you're friends with Sophia.

You can't be friends with me
if you're friends with Emmy.

Are you guys asking us
to choose between you two?

But we can't do that.

Well, you're gonna have to.

Come on, Sophia, let's talk about this.

There's nothing to talk about.

(door closes)

You're late!

You owe me three more minutes
with those tomorrow.

And an extra minute
for pain and suffering.

Relax, I lost track of time.

I did tricks I've never done before.

Well, I didn't, the shoes did.

Max, what did you do?

They're filthy.

And what is this?

I'll just scrape that off on the sidewalk.

Sorry, I must be hearing things.

It sounded like you just said "scrape."

Yeah, I'll do it tomorrow.

Oh, tomorrow's been canceled.
You're never wearing these again.

You can't do that! They're half mine.

Sorry, Max. I have to protect
our investment.

OK, I understand.

Seriously?

I know where you live!

This is crazy. There's no way
we can choose between Emmy and Sophia.

We have to save their friendship.

But how? We already tried.

OK, well, this is where
you come up with a brilliant idea.

All we need to do is...

And then we...

Come on, Syd. I'm doing my part.
Meet me halfway.

Honestly, I don't think
there's anything we can do.

-This is so unfair.
-You wanna know what's unfair?

Customers that don't pay for anything.

Mr. R., we're just kids.

No, not you.
I mean my mom and her friends.

Why don't you tell them to leave?
It's time you lay down the law.

With them, not us.
You know, we've got a good thing going.

I can't kick them out. I abide by
the most important rule in business,

the customer's always right.

Hey, Judy's roommate,

still waiting for those water refills.

You know what?

You guys have been hogging
this table for days.

Don't you think it's time
you eat something?

-Good idea.
-Thank you.

How about poppin' this burrito
in the microwave?

All right, that's it! I've had enough!
Get out! All of you!

OK, people.

Time of meltdown
two days, hours, and five minutes.

What's going on?

This was an experiment
for our psych class.

We wanted to see how long it takes
an average man to lose his cool.

Wait. I was a test subject?

I prefer the term guinea pig.

Well, I prefer the term
get out of my store!

-What? Even me?
-Especially you!

But be home by six.
(whispers) I'm making meatloaf.

Wow, good for your dad.

He stopped letting them push him around.

Olive, that's it.

Wait, before you say anything,
let me do my part.

All we need to do is--

Just let me have my moment, man.

Judy: Max, is that you?

-Yeah.
-Judy: Leo's here.

-Judy: Max?
-Be right there!

Hey, buddy.

Hiya, pal.

Is something going on between you two?

Do I want to know?

Did I just answer my own question?
All right, dinner will be ready soon.

I'm here for the shoes.

I will not let you destroy them.

Just 'cause I know
how to have fun with them,

doesn't mean I'm gonna destroy them.

You know what? Forget it.

I never want to share anything
with you ever again.

Not a problem.

Boys, dinner is served.

Oh, no!

I can save them!

Is it sad that these smell
better than my casserole?

Stay with me! Hang on!

Dude, they're in a better place.

And it's all my fault.

I can't believe I hid shoes
in a microwave.

No. It's my fault.

I never should have expected you
to keep them so clean.

I've seen you eat dirt.

I guess we're both to blame.

You're right.

We let these get in the way
of the most important thing we share.

-Our friendship.
-Totally.

You know, we should keep these
as a symbol of what happens

when we let something come between us.

-(sniffs) Boy, they stink.
-You're right. Let's just toss 'em.

Is this really gonna work?
Not that I'm worried. Are you worried?

-I'm a little worried.
-Yeah, me too.

(knock at door)

Hey, guys. Thanks for coming.

So, you've made a decision?

Yes, we have.

Which one of us did you choose?

It was a difficult decision.

But after weighing our options,
we've decided to pick...

neither of you.

Both: What?

Sadly, it's the only fair solution.

And now, we'd like to make it official.

Emmy, Sophia, please follow us.

(funeral music playing)

What is this?

Emmy, Sophia,

welcome to the funeral for our friendship.

Please be seated.

Seriously?

Ladies and...

ladies...

we are gathered here today to say goodbye
to a foursome's amazing friendship.

One that has so tragically come to an end.

But while a funeral is a ceremony
to honor the past,

it's also a way to say goodbye
to what could've been.

Sydney: Here we are,

not celebrating
our high school graduations together.

And here you aren't again...

not being bridesmaids at my wedding.
The most talked about event of the season.

Who will catch the bouquet?

Olive? Grandma Judy?

Beyoncé?

Sadly, we know two people
it definitely won't be.

-And here you aren't at my baby shower--
-Stop this! It's horrible.

I don't want to lose the two of you.
Our friendship doesn't have to end.

Sorry. You've given us no choice.

Olive: But, hey, we get it.

It's not like you guys are overreacting.

You ended your friendship
for really good reasons.

Yeah. Sophia, it's OK for you
to hate going to Emmy's shows.

Wait, I don't hate going to Emmy's shows.

You don't?

No. I love your shows.

I just want to have a choice.

When you just expect me to be there,

it feels like you don't care
about what I want.

Really?

But I would never want you
to feel that way.

There's nothing more important
to me than what you want.

So then why do you make Sophia
come to all your shows?

I just get so nervous
in front of all those people.

Seeing your face out there
gives me confidence.

You bring out the best in me.

I do?

I never realized how important it was.

I'm so sorry I lied.

It's too bad
they never said this to each other

when their friendship was alive.

What if I promise I'll always ask you
if you want to come to my shows?

And I promise I'll never lie to you again.

-Really?
-Really.

Both: Aww...

I missed you so much.

I missed you too!

-Well done.
-Right back at ya.

And now we get to be bridesmaids
at your wedding!

I can't wait to meet Beyoncé!

(howls)

Who's ready to watch
some Werewolf Girlfriend?

-I am.
-I am.

-I am.
-(howls)

I definitely am.

How?

I've binged all episodes,
and I'm all caught up.

Sorry, guys.
Mind if my dad watches it with us?

Sure. As long as The Four Amigas
are watching together, I'm good.

Man, I can't wait to see
the look on your faces

when we meet Zoey's
long-lost werewolf mom.

I read all about it online.

Mr. R...

Oh, right. Uh...

Spoiler alert.

♪ Do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do ♪

♪ Do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do ♪

♪ Do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do ♪

♪ Do do, do do do do ♪

♪ Do do ♪

Man: Oh, yeah.