03x06 - My Own First Enemies

[bunniefuu]

♪

Syd, that was definitely
your best show ever.

That's so nice.

Not that the other ones
weren't also amazing,

but this one was super amazing.

Aw, so sweet.

Not that the other ones
weren't super amazing...

-Olive.
-Thanks. We would've
been here all night.

Hi. I just wanted to say

you must be so proud
of your daughter.

She is so talented.

Thank you.
She gets it all from me.

-Really?
-Not even a little.

[laughs]

Well, it's nice
to meet an honest man.
I'm Georgia.

Max.

Mama, can we stay
a little bit longer?

I wanna get a picture
of me and Sydney.

[sing-song]:
I love her!

[chuckles]
Okay, but don't
take too long.

That's my daughter, Lily.

Well, don't we have a lot in common.

We both have daughters, we both...

-love music nights.
-[phone buzzing]

We both want me to buy
us dinner this weekend.

Sorry, what'd you say?
That was my husband.

Nothing that wasn't
totally embarrassing.

Nice meeting you.

Too bad, Max.
You were this close.

Why'd she have to be married?

She was so nice
and standing right here.

That's all I could want in a woman.

That's why you need
to get on a dating app.

It's so easy.
You create a profile,

and it matches you
with single people.

Thanks, but I prefer to
meet people in person.

Ah, yes!
The way they did it
in the days of yore.

And by that, I mean the days
of you're... still single.

-Hi.
-Oh, hello there.
What's your name?

I'm Lily Elizabeth Chu,
and I'm your biggest fan.

-Aw.
-Can I get a selfie?

Of course.
Let me have your phone.

One day, I wanna write a song
as good as Find My Own Way.

I just wish it was online
so I could listen
to it all the time.

You could, but someone
won't let me post her music.

Yeah, well maybe that someone

isn't ready to share
her music with the world.

Excuse me, can I get my selfie?

Someone has an early bedtime.

Oh, right. Of course.

[shutter snaps]

I agree with your friend.

You really gotta get
your music out there.

Well, the people have spoken.

Maybe it is time for me
to put my music out there.

If one Lily likes it,
there might be a bunch
of Lilys who do

or maybe even
a Skyler, or some Emmas!

Or even an Edgar!

Probably not an Edgar.
They're mostly into dubstep.

♪ Do do do do ♪

[theme music playing]

♪ Like father, like daughter,
we don't always agree ♪

♪ But looking at you
is like looking at me ♪

♪ The more things change,
the more they stay the same ♪

♪ Like father, like daughter,
from different times ♪

♪ Taking all the best
from your decade and mine ♪

♪ The more things change

♪ The more they stay the same

♪ Do do, do do do do,
do do ♪

♪ The more they stay the same

♪

Ooh! I see you took my advice
and signed up for a dating app.

No. It is a database for
people who are looking for...

Okay, fine.
It's a dating app.

Read me your profile.
Let's see what you got.

Okay.

"Single dad and big bike fan

enjoys quiet evenings
watching cooking shows."

[snoring]

How did I not see that coming?

Why don't you let me
give your profile a glow-up?

'Cause I can't think
of anything sadder

than my mother getting me dates.

Sadder than you in a bathrobe
at : on a Saturday night?

It's a silk kimono,
and it's usually
around : .

Okay, Syd,

you ready to make
your first music video?

Yep! Feeling good,

I'm feeling loose, let's do this.

-And three, two, go!
-[beep]

Hey, everyone! I'm Cindy.

I mean Snidney.
I mean,

did my mouth forget my name?

-Cut!
-[beep]

Sorry. I'm just
a little nervous.

No worries. Let's go again.

-Three, two, go.
-[beep]

Heeey!

Nope, that's too long.
One more time.

[low pitched]: Hey!

[normal voice]:
Nope. Too low.

[high pitched]:
Hey!

[normal voice]:
Too high.

[southern accent]:
Howdy, y'all!

[normal voice]:
Where did that come from?

Hey, everyone!
I'm Sydney Reynolds.

Hey! I didn't say
"Snidney" that time!

Ah, man.

-Cut.
-[beep]

Syd, why are you so nervous?

I don't know.

It's kinda scary putting
a song out there.

What if everyone hates it?

Everyone who hears
Find My Own Way loves it.

Just take a breath
and do what you always do.

You got this.

Thanks, Olive.
I needed that.

-Three, two, go.
-[beep]

Hey, everyone.
Uh, I'm Sydney Reynolds,

and, uh, this is my
first time posting music.

I'm gonna play a song that
I was lucky enough to play

for Ricky Angelo.

Hope you guys like it.

[playing guitar]

♪ First thing when I wake up

♪ I look in the mirror
and I see ♪

♪ Somebody

♪ I wanna be

♪ I know that I'm young, but

♪ Can it possibly be
as impossible ♪

♪ As it seems?

'Sup, Bucky?

Hey, Max. Is Leo here?
I just got a new computer,

and I wanted to give him
my screen name for IM.

Your what now?

Screen name.
For instant messaging.

It's this new online service

where you can talk
to anyone in an instant.

-Hey, Bucky, can we talk?
-Sure!

See?
That was pretty instant.

Yeah, but we're in the same room.

With IM, you can message anyone.

Anywhere. Even on
the other side of the world!

Who do you know on
the other side of the world?

No one!

Then I rest my case.

It's lame.
Besides, Leo isn't here.

He's studying for our
Spanish test tomorrow.

Or as the Spanish would say, uh...

Hm. Maybe I should study, too.

Next time you see Leo,

can you give him my screen name?

Feel free to keep it
for yourself, too.

Thanks, but I-M
for sure never gonna IM.

-Hey, Alisha!
-Hi, Max! What's going on?

Not much.
Bucky was just telling me

about that whole lame
instant messaging thing.

Oh my gosh!
I love instant messaging!

Me, too!

You do?
I'll give you my screen name,
so we can IM.

Awesome.

"G-R-L power."

Grall power? Gruel power?

[giggles]
It's girl power.

I woulda gotten there eventually.

♪

I don't get it.
Why would you wanna
go to a movie

when you just dropped
your first music video?

Don't you wanna see
all the likes roll in?

Or dislikes. I just don't
wanna sit around all day,

waiting to see what
people think of me.

Now, come on!
Let's go to the movie.

You love a good prom com.

Prom com?

Yeah. A comedy set
at a high school prom.

I made it up.
Fun, right?

Stick to songwriting, Reynolds.

[beep]

Wow! Looks like
your video is...

Bup, bup, bup!
Don't wanna know.

-But there's... But you... Fine.
-Bup! Bup! Bup!

Sorry, just slipped out.

-Sydney, you got
a bunch of likes.
-Olive, I told you I don't...

wanna...

Well, just how many likes
are we talking about?

A lot!

-Really?
-[beep]

[beeping]

Whoa, that is a lot.

People really like my song!

Whoa, Olive.
Mandy called my song

the best thing she's ever heard.

Olive?

Olive?

♪

♪

How's the dating app going?
Any matches yet?

It's going super well.
I'm basically

dodging ladies at this point.

-So, none, huh?
-Not even one.

Okay, here's the problem.
Instead of "bike shop owner,"

you should say
you're a private investor

in alternative transportation.

I'm not gonna lie!

It's not lying.
It's embellishing.

It's adding sprinkles to the top of

a very bland vanilla ice cream cone.

Hey, vanilla is a very
underrated flavor.

Don't put that in your profile.

[beep]

Well, look at that.
Plain old vanilla Max

just got his first match.

Nope. It's a coupon
for a funeral home.

You could use that
to bury your love life.

Okay, I give up.
What would you
put in my profile?

I already wrote it.

And by the way,

you won Portland's
most handsome bachelor

in and .

What happened in ?

Boy, for a guy with no dates,
you sure are greedy.

Wow, Syd. Did you see
what RockNJoel said?

-"Syd's new song
made me feel seen.
-"...made me feel seen.

Both:
She's the voice
of our generation."

Yeah, I might've seen it.

You should be very proud, Syd.
Your songs really say something.

Forget what my songs say.

You should hear what my fans say.

Yeah.
Listen to this.

"The lyrics are straight
from that girl's soul.

Hashtag musical genius."

Oh, I would never say genius.

But if SmileyRiley says it,
who am I to argue?

Boy, Syd, you've
really come a long way

from being afraid
to put yourself out there.

I know, right? I mean,

I always knew
I was a good songwriter,

but it turns out, I'm...

an incredible songwriter!

Olive:
Yeah, you are!

And you were afraid
people wouldn't like you.

I know.
What was I thinking?

It's me!

Syd, we gotta find a way
to thank your fans.

Oh, I know!
I should post another song.

Yes! The fans
need more content.

And what better way to thank
them for loving my music than...

giving them more to love.

You're so good to us.

[dial-up modem
connecting to internet]

And just like that,
I'm on the worldwide web.

Alright.
Let's see what's up
with G-R-L Power.

Hi. How are you?

Max! Get off the internet!

You know I can't use
the phone when you're online.

But, Mom, this is important.

Oh. Are you doing homework?

No. I said it was important.

I'm instant messaging with Alisha.

Ooh, Alisha. Your crush.

-Mom...
-[beep]

Look! Look,
she wrote me back!

"So cool running
into you today."

-Cooler running into you.
-[gasps]

Oh, my little boy is flirting.

-Is that what I'm doing?
-Yeah.

Then get outta here!
I don't want my mom
to see me flirt!

Okay, Olive, you ready to sh**t this?

Yep. And three, two, go.

What up, Syd-Queens?
It's ya girl, Syd, here.

Olive, why aren't you recording?

Oh. I thought I'd
let you get a few

"Snidneys" outta your system,

and maybe a "howdy, y'all."

Nope. All ready.
Let's do this.

You got it.

-And three, two, go.
-[beep]

What up, Syd-Queens?
It's ya girl Syd here.

So, this next song is super personal.

I know it'll speak to your souls

as much as it does to mine.

Like, comment, subscribe below.

♪ How can I say this?

♪ My hands are shaking

♪ I feel the weight
all around ♪

♪ And I can't tell if

♪ I'm being selfish

♪ Would I be
letting you down? ♪

-[typing]
-[beep]

Are you still IMing with Alisha?

Yeah! It's going great.

It's so much easier to talk to girls

when you don't have
to actually look at them.

In fact, I think I'm ready
to tell her I like her.

Ooh! How you gonna do it?
Flowers? Candy?

A shower wouldn't hurt.

Nah, I'm just gonna IM her.

What?

I can't believe you
wouldn't tell Alisha

something this important in person.

Why not? This way,
if she doesn't like me back,

I'll just tell her a cat
ran across my keyboard.

Oh! And we'll have to get a cat.

Well, at least you've
thought it through.

-[typing]
-Hey.

This may surprise you,

but I really like you.

-[click]
-[beeping]

"I really like you, too.
You're a really good friend."

-[typing]
-Actually,

I like you more than a friend.

-[click]
-[beeping]

"I like you more
than a friend, too!"

Oh my gosh!
She like-likes you!

-Mom! Play it cool.
-[beep]

"Would you like to have lunch with me

at the food court
tomorrow?"

-[typing, beep]
-It's a date!

-It's a date! It's a date!
-We have a date with Alisha!

[laughing]

Why haven't any of
the comments loaded yet?

Relax. My fans are waiting

for just the right words.

Fame. Am I right?

-[beep]
-Ooh! Wait, first comment.

What's it say?

"Syd's new song is terr..."

You know, let's just
read the next one.

Oh, would you look at that?
My phone just d*ed.

"Leave You Behind

is a boring song by a basic girl"?

Boring?

Basic? I'm boring and basic?

Don't listen to that guy.

His handle is Bob .
Talk about basic.

Well, this girl
says that my song is
capital M-E-H.

What does that stand for?

I think she means "meh."

Or maybe she means meh!

I appreciate you
trying to cover, but...

I think everyone hates this song.

Not everyone.

There's a bunch of likes
and some good comments.

Like from your old fan, SmileyRiley ?

What does SmileyRiley know?

Last song, she called me
a musical genius,

and, obviously,
she was wrong about that.

You're just getting
stuck on the negative.

Try focusing on the positive.

Okay. I'm positive
my song stinks.

This is exactly what I was afraid of

about posting my music.

Don't worry.
I don't blame you.

I didn't think you were.

If anything, blame that
adorable little girl.

I do.

♪

-[beep]
-You hear that, Mom?

My dating profile is blowing up.

Ladies love new and improved Max.

See? You did need your
mother's help to get dates.

Why am I bragging about that?

Have you responded to anyone yet?

Not yet. I'm still working
on my opening line.

Can I pull off a,

"'Sup, girl?"

Aw, Max. Of course you can't.

Hey, Syd!
You gotta see all the reactions
my profile is getting.

-Your dad is on fire.
-Oh, speaking of fire,

I can't wait to see
the comments
on your new song.

I've been meaning to look.

Well, why don't I give you the recap?

"Horrible. Uninspired.

Thinks she's Taylor Swift,
but can't pull it off."

-Sydney, that's awful!
-Yep, that's in there, too.

I'm so sorry.
I don't get it, Syd.

Everyone loved your other song.

Well, they don't love my last.

What do you mean your last?

Well, obviously, these comments
prove I'm not a songwriter.

I'm just a girl who got lucky
and wrote one okay song.

♪

♪

Hey, Syd.

Please tell me
you're not still looking

at those negative comments?

I don't need to.
They're b*rned into my brain.

You can't let a bunch
of faceless haters

stop you from writing your songs.

Who knows? Your next
song could be a hit.

You have no idea what people like!

That's the problem, Olive.
I don't know what people like.

-Or do I?
-Do you?

-I do!
-Ooh!

Wait, what are we talking about?

Everyone already told me what
they liked in these comments.

I have everything I need
to write the perfect song!

You're gonna write another song?

Is it about me?
Is it about how

I'm the greatest friend in the world?

Is it about how you'd
like me to leave

so you can work on your song?

I'm thinking the third one.

Hey! I guessed
what it was about!

♪

You just keep getting
better with age.

Hi, Max!

Oh! Alisha! 'Sup, girl?

Ready to go to the food court?

Food court?
Thanks, but I already ate.

[laughs] Very funny.

O... kay.

Hey, what happened last night?

I thought you were gonna message me.

I did message you.
We talked all night.

No, we didn't.

Then, who was I talking to?

Hey, Max!
You ready to go
to the food court?

Gah!

Well, I'm gonna go
crush some zombies.

And don't forget to
message me tonight.

G-R-L Power, no I.

Hey! That's like
my screen name.

G-R-L-L Power, no I.

'Cause me and my dad love grilling.

He grills, and I watch!

Sometimes, he even lets me clean!

I am so psyched we're
having lunch together!

-Right. About that, Bucky...
-Max,

you may not have noticed,

but I don't have a lot of friends,

so this means a lot to me.

It does? Really?

Yeah. That's why it
was so great to hear

that you liked me
as more than a friend.

'Cause I think of you
as a best friend, too.

So, what were you gonna tell me?

Oh! Um, just that...

you better be hungry
'cause we're hitting

every place in the food court.

Oh, you're on!

Tonight, we should IM all night long.

In fact, why IM when
we could have a sleepover?

♪

Hey, Syd.
What's all this?

I'm writing a new song!

On this side are the lyrics to
Find My Own Way.

I've circled in green the phrases

people specifically said they liked.

-Okay.
-And on this side is
Leave You Behind,

with the phrases people
hated circled in red.

Now, all I have to do is
avoid all of these circles,

but include these circles, and then,

I will have written the perfect song

that everybody loves
and no one hates!

Looks great... if you're
trying to solve a m*rder.

But, is this really how
you wanna write your songs?

Before you judge, Dad,

take a listen.

♪ Morning, morning,
wake up, breakfast ♪

♪ Mirror, shiny glass,
I wanna be ♪

♪ I'm young, not old,
I wanna twist ♪

♪ Impossible, mm, probably!

So, what do you think?

-Well... I don't hate it.
-You hate it.

Well, you should because I hate it.

Sydney, why are you writing
a song that you don't like?

It doesn't matter what I like
because according to the data,

this is what my fans like.

Okay. How'd it feel when you
got all those positive comments?

Great. Like I could
do anything.

And how'd it feel when you
got all the negative ones?

Awful. Like I couldn't
do anything.

Sydney, you can't give so much power

to a bunch of anonymous opinions,

either good or bad.

If you do, you won't know
who you are anymore.

Oh, you mean like Max,

the alternative
transportation investor?

Wow, you're right.

As much as I like getting
all those matches,

they're not matching
with the real me.

Which is why I am
gonna go back to being

plain old boring vanilla Max.

That's good for you,
Dad, but this different.

I mean, isn't the whole
point of writing music

making something that people
actually wanna listen to?

Well, sure, but you still have
to write songs that you love.

And if little girls like
Lily are inspired by it,

then that's an added bonus.

You're right. I mean,

the reason I started writing songs

was so my voice could be heard.

You know what? I'm gonna
keep posting my music

and forget about the comments.

I am done with those.

-I'm proud of you, Syd.
-I'm proud of you, too.

In fact, you've inspired me
to write a song

about how vanilla is the most
underrated flavor.

-I love that idea.
-I'm not accepting
comments, Dad.

[laughs]

♪

Nice to see you writing a song

with a guitar and not a whiteboard.

Yeah. The whiteboard
got kicked out of the band.

Creative differences.

[beep]

No way, I got a match!
Someone likes vanilla Max!

Syd, I don't know what to say!

Alright. Stay calm.
Just be yourself.

Okay. If I were me,
what would I say?

- "Hello"?
-Hello.

Hello. Yes!
That is what I would say!

Oh, she responded.
She wrote...

dot dot dot.
What does that mean?

It means she's still typing.

-Oh, right.
I knew that. [laughs]
-[beep]

She said,
"Cool matching with you."

Cooler matching with you.

I don't wanna see
my dad flirt. I'm out.

♪

♪ Do do, do do do do, do do

♪ Do do, do do do do, do do

♪ Do do, do do do do, do do

♪ Do do, do do do do, do do

Man:
Oh yeah.