07x15 - Welcome to wherever you are

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The West Wing". Aired September 1999- May 2006.*
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An American political drama revolving around the White House Staff.
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07x15 - Welcome to wherever you are

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on The West Wing:

State-by-states are out.

Tied in South Carolina,
Arkansas and California.

You wanna be involved.

It doesn't come with an invitation.
You involve yourself or you don't.

I have an awkward question to ask
about your brother.

Did David ever mention anything
about another kind of space shuttle?

A m*llitary shuttle?

Did he ever mention anything
about anything like that?

The sentencing guidelines...

...even for a first-time offender,
were to months' jail time.

- You have an obligation...
- Don't bring up my kids!

When you walk out of here,
there'll be people out there...

...who think of you as a hero.

I just don't for a moment
want you thinking I'll be one of them.

- That was a rally.
- Thirty thousand people.

One hell of an opening act.

You know, he was
when he recorded that?

- That's kind of hot.
- You partial to young achievers?

Musicians, really.

- Okay, easy there, Stevie.
- Hey, if you can't boogie to the man...

You think she's singing about Leo?

Chicago, we hardly knew ye.

- We're in St. Louis.
- Really?

We should hit the town,
try some of that fresh frozen custard.

- We have an early rally in Scranton.
- That's not an option?

- Afraid not.
- Is sleep an option?

- Sleep is for the weak.
- You've had six hours in three days.

- You're starting to talk funny.
- We've added some jokes to the stump.

We'll get him to sleep once
we go over the schedule.

Man, it's ugly.
Four states and six markets a day.

- k*ller, huh?
- You sound excited about this.

- I'm just saying, Everest is for sissies.
- You're a masochist.

- This is news?
- Hey, I heard he did well.

Almost as well as Mr. Wonder.

- Where's Annabeth?
- I threw her in a luggage compartment.

- She's checking in with Leo.
- Apparently.

- Excuse me?
- Nothing.

- Really? Nothing.
- What?

- You don't wanna know.
- Know what?

- Let's take a look at the schedule.
- Good idea. Lou?

Across the top, days of the week. Down
the side, major battleground states.

Blue S's for Santos. Green L's for Leo.
Red B's for Bartlet.

The purple clovers entertain me when I'm
waiting for Josh to make up his mind.

- Nice touch.
- Tomorrow is Scranton, Bethlehem...

...Philadelphia, Cincinnati,
Dayton and Houston?

- It's all about hustle.
- Another stop in Houston?

It's a turnout game, so yes.
Plus, it's a bridge to Friday...

...when we cover Texas
then on to L.A. And Atlanta.

- Leo thinks we need a stop in Florida.
- He wants to add a stop?

Zogby's got us down by two,
and we're not there till Saturday.

- Congressman?
- Yeah?

- Sir?
- Okay.

- I could use some coffee.
- No more coffee for you.

- Helps with narcolepsy.
- Not with sleeping.

We're considering adding
a stop in Florida tomorrow.

We're down by two.

- The whole state is dark until Saturday.
- Sure, if you think...

- I will do it.
- No, honey.

Zoey Bartlet will be doing some women's
events outside of Miami tomorrow...

...if Mrs. Santos could join...
- Okay, you'll have her back...

...for the trick-or-treating
photo op in Dayton?

- No problem.
- Okay, good. Tomorrow, Pennsylvania...

...Ohio, Texas.
Friday, Texas then California.

Saturday, Sunday, Monday,
we hit the big five.

Big five: Pennsylvania, Ohio,
Florida, Texas and California.

- Five states a day?
- We're gonna play time-zone hopscotch.

- Fly with the sun.
- California's screwing up our sleep cycle.

- What sleep cycle?
- Congressman?

Five days, huh?

Hey, you can hang
by your thumbs for five days.

There you have it, folks.
Signed, sealed and delivered.

The last five days
of the Santos campaign.

Did you see the Illinois numbers?

- You should do the crossword.
- We're up three points.


People who do the crossword are less
likely to experience mental decline.


- I enjoy these calls.
- Miami-Dade, you need to pay attention...

- HQ e-mailed the latest ads.
- Hang on.

- Got Vinick's...?
- Every ad he's run all week.

- I wanna screen them.
- Pennsylvania numbers?

- Pennsylvania, Illinois, California...
- Miami-Dade voter registration.

You're a killjoy, you know that?
You're a doorstep darkener.

- You darken doorsteps.
- Yeah, you need to look in...


Vinick's remarks in Ohio and Texas.
Sullivan's remarks in Virginia.

- You got the...?
- Yeah.


And the rundown on the...

Thanks.

- Sorry. Go ahead.
- Miami-Dade.


- You're down two in Florida.
- It's pretty loud. Kind of hard to hear.


- You're down two in Florida, Josh.
- I'm on it.


- How many states are you hitting today?
- I think Josh Lyman over there...

...is sh**ting for about .

You got another meeting today?

- Yeah.
- Let's make a deal?

- Or not.
- Let me know how it goes.


Yeah, thanks.

- Okay, one more.
- Who do you like in the game?

Philly and New York? Both strong teams.
Should be a great game.

- Thanks, congressman.
- Thanks, guys.

- We are in Pennsylvania, right?
- Yeah.

- Harris Malbin, Pennsylvania party chair.
- Harris.

Got Wallace from headquarters on
turnout, Goodwin on legal contingencies...

...CIA briefer, former NSA Nancy McNally
on Kazakhstan. How you doing?

A lot of people out there
for an a.m. Rally.

Let's try that again.
How are you doing?

I'm okay. Except for
the thermometer stuck up...

- Congressman?
- Just checking in.

- Jon, good to see you.
- My pleasure, sir.

Lou mentioned all the work
you've been doing with Habitat.

- It's a privilege to have you.
- Thanks. It's a privilege...

...to play for the next president
of the United States.

Hello, Toby.

Toby?

- Yeah?
- We need to prep before...

What's a five-letter word
for "blow hard"?

- Toby?
- That's four letters.

We need to prep before
the U.S. Attorney gets here.

- Yes. Yes. No. And I already knew.
- Excuse me?

Wanted to prep.
Those are the answers.

I know because he's asked me
the same question five or six times.

- Okay. There's a reason...
- I should make a tape.

There's a reason the U.S. Attorney
keeps asking us down here.

- Counselor.
- Good morning.

- Good morning, counselor.
- Good morning.

No, I already got Vinick's schedule.
I need Sullivan's.

- A hearing aid and a pair of bifocals.
- And anything that we can get...

...on the status
of the troops in Astana.

- Okay? Thanks.
- Okay, thank you.

- Hey, Teddy.
- Hey.

- Welcome to the circus.
- Thanks.

- Did you get to meet Bon Jovi?
- Bon Jovi's here?

- Stevie Wonder opened last night.
- I'm a Jersey girl, Joshua.

Camaros, muscle T's,
a little Slippery When Wet.


- That is an album title, right?
- Guys, can we...?

- Yeah. Teddy, go ahead.
- I wanted to take you through...

...the election-day turnout.
- I don't believe it.

- What?
- They stole our slogan.

Yes, America can.

- Isn't that our slogan?
- Damn right.

- Teddy.
- You all right?

- No.
- Her back went out.

- Get me Donna.
- I have seven copies...

...of Vinick's schedule.
- Just keep talking.

- Can I get Sullivan's schedule?
- Okay...

- Election turnout.
- Right. We have , volunteers...

...in the major cities.
- I need copies of the first Vinick ad.

- Five thousand in New York.
- Latest polls from AP and Reuters.

- Thank you.
- An additional in New York, Boston...

Hey, hold on.
I need the polling detail for...

- Teddy, we worried about the inner city?
- Otto!

- We're fine. Talk about Latino turnout.
- We are concerned about Latino turnout.

I need the Colorado polling detail.
Miami-Dade voter registration numbers...

...are only up two percent
in the last four years.

- Miami-Dade's percent Latino.
- Sixty-two.

Thank you. So do you think
Miami is indicative...

- Latino turnout across the country? Yes.
- Given how crucial Latino turnout is...

Yeah, I got it.
So, what are we gonna do?

You know,
to remind everyone that I'm Latino?

- "Ineligible ex-cons in Florida."
- Have you see my phone?

It's in your...

A lot of states deny ex-cons
the right to vote.

Maybe that's why
we don't run on the bus.

We don't wanna push ex-con voting, but
a lot of these guys already cleared parole.

- They should be allowed to vote...
- This is a mess.

He's got the Times-Tribune call.

Do we think the governor
is stacking the list?

The suggestion he's trying to keep
Latinos away from the polls...

Would set the fire under the ass
of every goica.

But that's a hell of an accusation
for me to be throwing out there.

- Not you.
- See these Colorado numbers?

Yeah, that's why
I asked Otto for the detail.

- There's a rally in Miami at noon...
- You wanna send Helen there?

- She has to mention it.
- Late for the Times.


- We know!
- Why can't we get Ruiz...

...or Hinajosa to give that speech?
- Sir, if we're gonna do this...

...we gotta do it with a bang.
- My blond wife lecturing...

...the National Organization of Latinas.
Yeah, that's a bang.

We can't get the media trucks
if we don't have a headliner.

Okay. Thanks, Teddy.
Give me a couple of seconds.

Ms. Waterman, Mr. Ziegler.

- Mr. Blake.
- Sorry to keep you waiting.

- Mr. Ziegler, I invited you here today...
- A five-letter word for "blow hard"?

- Toby.
- Just asking.

Mr. Ziegler, as much as we both
enjoy these sessions...

...I was hoping we could
keep this one brief.

Thank you.
Now, there's a deal on the table.

As much as I wouldn't mind
locking you up for the next six years...

...the information leaked was classified.
You were not authorized to have it.

And the public, a group you should
have some allegiance to...

...has the right to know
where you got it.

You broke the law.
You didn't do it alone.

Say where you got your information,
we make it a year.

With time off for good behavior?

I appreciate you keeping it brief.
I'll keep it briefer. I'm not interested.

- Didn't think you would be.
- First five times I said no tip you off?

They did, in fact.
Which is why I'm adding a sweetener.

What is it?

- It's a second indictment.
- For what?

Obstruction of justice. Mr. Ziegler
tells me where he got his information...

...or I call the grand jury and have him
indicted for obstruction of justice.

Tomorrow.

You're adding another indictment
four days before a presidential election?

Not only will I indict you again...

...but I'm going to subpoena C.J. Cregg,
Leo McGarry and President Bartlet.

It'll look like he's covering up
for someone in the White House.

- No reason to believe he's not.
- You'll sabotage a national election?

No, you are.

Oh, and by the way, it's "storm."

- Excuse me?
- Five letters for "blow hard."

"Storm."

Pretty sure it's the word
you're looking for.

What will you focus on
in your first days?

We've been tossing around ideas.
We're just starting to narrow it down.

- Sure, but...
- It's our slogan.

- Yes, but tights?
- We used it two months ago.

- Not exactly presidential.
- I don't care if it's a coincidence.

- I'll see what I can do.
- Come on, there's a story here.

Hello? Hello?

- How you feeling?
- Terrible. They just hung up on me.

- AP?
- Reuters.

- Snotty.
- Little. How's it going with the Times?


I got off the phone with Stu
from The Tonight Show.


- Comedy writer?
- He thinks so.

You don't think the congressman
would wear tights on TV, do you?

- Tights?
- They want him to dress like Robin Hood.

- Why not Zorro?
- I'll call the Times.


Let me know if they bite.
Have you seen Jon?

- Jon?
- Bon Jovi. Sixty thousand people...

...in Bethlehem, the congressman
wanted to say thank you.

- I think I saw him on the press van.
- Great.

Jack, it's Lou.
I've got a story for you.

- How do you think you're doing?
- Those who are listening...

...know that we have fresh ideas.
- One more question.

Do you plan on watching
the game this weekend?

Philly and New York,
they're both strong teams.

- Thank you, congressman.
- Thank you all. Thank you. Thank you.

- You have my wife?
- She's on the phone with Josh.

Congresswoman Lea Stein.

Lea. How are you?

Barry, thanks for coming.
Just give me a minute.

- No problem, congressman.
- Thank you.

Yeah. Yeah, of course, ma'am,
we just... Actually, he's right here.

- She's pretty riled up.
- I wonder why.

- Hey.
- The National Organization of Latinas?


- You got those numbers for me?
- Yes.

- He does remember I'm white.
- He does now.


- Whiter than white. White Album white.
- Believe me, this wasn't...


White devil, white dahlia, the white witch
who lured a gorgeous Latino man away...

Honey, if you're not comfortable
doing this...

I'll go. But I'm not gonna give a speech.

I'll do the intro. Let Hinajosa
talk about the ex-convict lists.

Okay. Zogby's got us
down by four in Colorado?

- Yeah.
- And only because it's a good cause.

On behalf of big, gorgeous
Latino men everywhere...

I mean the million ex-convicts
who can't vote in this country.

- Right.
- My mother's flying the kids up at .


Make sure they don 't eat too much
Halloween candy before I get there.


She'll headline.
She wants Hinajosa to do the speech.

- What is happening in Colorado?
- Sullivan parachuted in last week.

- Seemed to have an impact.
- You think?

Donna's looking
for surrogates to send in.

- Berryhill's sick, no A.G.
- Takers on the slogan story?

- No Reuters or Post.
- Times?


- CIA briefer's here.
- So who are we sending to Colorado?

Leo's in Michigan and Illinois. Bartlet's
never been very popular out there.

- The V.P.?
- Plays well in the Rockies.

- Russell's in Michigan today.
- Get him on the phone.

You wanna send the briefer
or should I sit with Goodwin?

- Get him on the chat.
- The chat?

- Atrios just flew in.
- Atrios?

- You have a live chat on Eschaton.
- Really? I speak three languages, but...

It's a blog.

We're gonna bump the CIA and
Barry Goodwin for a guy named Atrios?

He's raised grand online.

He has almost as many readers
as The Philadelphia Inquirer. Sorry.


- Atrios. Welcome to the campaign.
- Sir, it's an honor.

There's more than enough here
to convince a grand jury.

- No way he'll go through with it.
- Toby...

This is absolute partisan garbage,
total political bull...

It's got nothing to do with politics.
The guy's a Bartlet appointee.

Plenty of moderate Democrats
in love with Vinick.

It's his responsibility
to uncover the truth.

- Be that as it may, he's bluffing.
- Maybe.

There's no way he's gonna throw
a national election.

- What?
- Look, Toby...

If you're trying to protect
your brother, then...

Damn it, Toby, he indicts you tomorrow.
You know that a McGarry subpoena...

...is gonna all but guarantee
a Vinick landslide on Tuesday.

He's not gonna do it.

Are you really prepared
to take that chance?

Yes, I get it. I need the Rasmussen poll.
Yes, I need to talk to Edie.

- Is that the latest polling?
- Oh, yeah.

How's it looking?

- Pretty good.
- Lou, I've got Edie.

- Tell her I'll call her back. Thank you.
- Cool, Illinois.

It is. And you know what else is cool?
Your new album. Fantastic.

- Yeah, I'll hold.
- I'm sorry, could you hold?

Donna Moss.

- I have a Bob on the phone.
- I'll call him back.

- You said there was a story on Drudge?
- Excuse me, I have to make a phone call.

- Sure, no problem.
- Living on a prayer?

- Aren't you on the phone?
- I'm on hold. What's on Drudge?

- Got the latest Rasmussen poll.
- It's skewed.

- It's got us up by four in Ohio.
- Ohio trends Santos. Story of the day.

- You wanna call...? Okay.
- Yeah.

- I've got Annabeth.
- I'll call back. I'm holding for the V.P.

You got that?
You still pushing the slogan story?

- It's dead. Why?
- Okay.

Vinick's "Yes, America Can" bus tour?
Buses were made in Canada.

You're a very attractive young man.

- You want me to call...?
- I got it.

- I got two good stories.
- I've got Annabeth.

- I'll call... Hi there.
- He's gonna call you back.

Yeah. Yeah, he can call back.

- Unbelievable.
- Russell ditch you again?

Only guy in America
that I can't get on the phone.

The Rasmussen poll.

Sullivan's back in Colorado?

- Pull Sullivan's schedule off the web.
- Ray Sullivan drew record crowds...


I'll get it.

- But perhaps the most surprising
development of the day...


... came an hour ago in Miami.

I'm calling again
for the vice president.

I understand he's a busy man.
I'm calling on behalf of Matthew Santos.

- It's a concern.
- Anything can you do...


Mrs. Santos, some Democratic
activists have argued...


... that laws against felon voting
should be abolished.


It's the largest block
of disenfranchised voters in the country.


I think it's something
we should look at.


- Yeah, I need to call him back.
- Can I call you back?

Hello? Hello?

Hi.

- Toby?
- Yeah.


Are you okay?

- Still coming over tonight?
- Yeah.


- Five o' clock, right?
- Sure.


Well, I thought maybe
I'd come over now.

- Help the kids get into their costumes.
- The kids are at preschool till .


- Right.
- Toby?


- Yeah?
- You're sitting outside my house.

Yeah.

- Can I come in?
- Toby, I have a lunch...

...and two campaign events.

I could tag along.

Probably not the message you wanna
send to your constituents, huh?

Why don't you come over
at like we planned?

Okay.

Vinick's tax plan has
so many exceptions and loopholes.

Tell him I wouldn't be a proponent
of any tax plan...

...that couldn't be figured out
on an Excel spreadsheet.

Let's go, let's go!

- I'm happy to type those answers.
- I gonna have to pull the congressman.

Not much of a people person.

- As many readers as The Philadelphia...
- I got it.


- Sullivan's in Colorado again?
- The V.P. Should neutralize him.

- He gonna do it?
- We're playing phone tag.

Ohio's trending Santos.

- Rasmussen poll?
- Story of the day.

Okay.

Am I gonna get to do my CIA briefing
on stability ops in Kazakhstan?

- Yeah.
- What?

Your wife just made a statement that
makes it sound like she's for felon voting.

In a universal suffrage,
"Free Capone" kind of way.

That won't play well with
law-and-order moderates in the West.

Not really, no.

- I have to take a position.
- Governor's teeing us up outside...

...and we need to get
a photo op in with DNC Finance.

What is the schedule after the rally?

Interview with the Inquirer, sit downs
with Goodwin, Nancy McNally...


Plus the Kazakhstan briefing.

- The Cincinnati event at .
- Yeah.

- We're behind.
- You wanna bump McNally?

No! See if Goodwin
and McNally can come to Ohio.

We'll talk about the rest
of this on the plane...

...and then talk legal
and Cincinnati in Kazakhstan.

- He meant the:
- Yeah, I'm gonna get him more coffee.

Hi.

Hi. Thank you, guys,
for all of your efforts.

Our pleasure, Mr. President.

I've taken pictures with
three commander in chiefs.

I think that's commanders in chief.

Oh, well. How about
leaders of the free world, then?

- Cart before the horse, my friend.
- Oh, no.

I know how to pick the winners,
and you're gonna win.

We'll be back for a photo
in the Oval before you know it.

- Santos! Santos!
- Santos!


I had more questions...

...for that CIA briefer about the troops
that are stationed at the...

- Yeah, we lost that guy at the rally.
- Probably not a field operative.

Congresswoman Cone,
Eighth District. How are you?

- Congresswoman, good to see you.
- Great to see you.

Well, can we make sure
that someone is in Ohio?

Yes. I'll have Lou put in a call.

- Thank you so much for your support.
- My pleasure.

You wanted to look over
the foreign-policy portion?

- We hear anything from Russell?
- No, but I got Leno on the phone.

- Is it Stu?
- Stu?

- He's one of the writers.
- It's not Stu.

Hi, Mr. Leno.

Yeah, this is Josh Lyman here.
Yes, I will hold.

Numbers from Michigan.
We're at five up.

- The congressman...
- We should pull Leo, send him south.

...doesn't wanna wear tights.

Can you conference me
into the McGarry Advance detail, please?

- Who are you holding for?
- The vice president.

- Getting a little existential in here.
- Hello?

Hi. We are waiting for him...

I have to take a pen
to this whole Israel section here.

- It's Josh Lyman.
- So I want you to set up...

...a conference call with Harold Waller...
- Want me to spell that?

...for later tonight.

- Any traction on that bus story?
- Eschaton blog picked it up.

- Your new pal Atrios is giving us love.
- What bus story?

Vinick did the "Yes, America Can" tour
on Canadian buses.

Anybody check
where our buses are made?

Otto!

I don 't know why people who break laws
should have a say in making...


- Surprise.
- It's not wine and roses for him.

He's losing footing
in the black community.

While locking up his base.

We need you to take another photo
with the senator.

- I took one on the tarmac.
- Congresswoman got one on the plane.

Make sure the press gets off this before
the weekend. Make a statement in Ohio.

These Jim Crow laws should've been
thrown out with the poll tax.

I'm not for giving the vote to
axe-murderers who get out of prison...

...but for the ones who are non-violent...
- I'll have Otto work on language.

Twenty-nine states deny ex-cons
the right to vote. We'll take a hit.

I'd be concerned about moderate Dems
in Texas and the West.

We're gonna be in Texas
till the election.

- But Arizona, Colorado...
- Yeah.

Did you try calling the vice president?

- Hey.
- Hey.

No costume?

Well, I thought about coming
as Julius Rosenberg.

- Hi, Daddy.
- Hi, Molly.

- I'm a baseball player.
- I can see that.

- She's an Oriole.
- Yeah.

What happened
to the Yankees stuff I bought?

She likes the little bird.

- Hi, Daddy!
- Hi, Huck. Come here.

Whoa, look at you.

He likes what she likes.

You guys going trick-or-treating?
Are we going trick-or-treating?

So do you wanna take them first?

No, you go ahead.

- Sorry, but if there's press...
- Yeah.

Okay, what are we gonna say?
Trick or treat!

Come on.
Stay close to Mommy, okay?

While I know this is primarily
a matter of state law...


... I think it's both imprudent
and unreasonable...


... for us to deny a political voice...

... to people who have
rehabilitated themselves.


- So you agree with your wife?
- Well, I like to when I can.

- Would you let all criminals vote?
- No.

But once non-violent offenders
have done their time...

...we should do everything we can...

...to help facilitate
a healthy return to society.

Okay, we need to wrap it up.

- Who do you like in the game?
- Philly and New York, both strong teams.

Should be a great game. Thank you.

- We're in Ohio.
- Go Buckeyes!

Play it again. Play it again.

All right.

- We gonna need to do follow up?
- With The Times and The Post.


- Leo's on the same page?
- He's giving a statement in Minneapolis.

- The fairy queen is on my bus!
- Hi, Daddy.

- Hi. That's a beautiful dress.
- It's itchy.

- Hey, Dad.
- Ice cream before dinner.

Graeter's, it's a Cincinnati delicacy.
Made for a great photo op.

- Where's their grandmother?
- I saw her chatting with Ben Affleck.

There's candy if you want
a head start trick-or-treating.

- I do!
- I do!


You know what?
I'll keep an eye on them for you.

- Thanks, Jon.
- He's fantastic.

An international rock star looking after
my kids. It's like a dream come true.

Oh, you want me to...

- I got McNally on Kazakhstan?
- Goodwin on the legal contingencies.

- And then McNally?
- Probably The Times.


- I've got Leo on the phone.
- Yeah...

...we were hoping to discuss
sending him down south.

And WKRC's been holding
for half an hour.

We'll try to squeeze McNally in
after the trick-or-treating.

Let's push the Waller call.
Can somebody find Helen's mother...

...and ask her to, you know, I don't
know, keep an eye on the kids.

How did we do?

Couple of Mars bars.

- Bit-O-Honey?
- That'll do.

- So the witch thing works.
- Yeah?

I mean, not as well as
the Catholic-schoolgirl thing, but yeah.

- I had a meeting today.
- Okay.

U.S. Attorney's office is threatening
another indictment tomorrow.

Obstruction of justice.

Which may very well screw
every Democrat...

...in the country running for office.
Not to mention the Santos campaign.

What the hell's the matter with you?

Just tell them it was your brother.

- Okay.
- Look, David's dead.

- Even if he were alive, he'd tell you...
- What if it wasn't David?

- Only you.
- What?

A Republican hasn't won
the Maryland Eighth in years.

I'm running neck and neck.

My campaign manager wants to make
"that's why I divorced him" buttons.

Just tell the U.S. Attorney it was David
and this will all be over.

- It's what he would've wanted.
- Don't tell me...

...what my brother
would have wanted.

He did nothing wrong,
and I will not consider for one second...

...defaming his reputation...

...over something he had
absolutely nothing to do with.

Is that what
you're gonna tell the kids?

- Hey, Josh.
- Yeah?

When you get a sec,
I'd like to pitch some ideas on service.

You know,
volunteerism on the national level.

We've been working hard
to make it hip again.

- "Volunteerism is the new black."
- Right. That's our slogan.

- Yeah, I saw it on Oprah.
- Great.


I'd like to come down to D.C.
Maybe during the transition.

- We'll set something up.
- Thanks.

- Sure, Jon.
- Thanks.

Was there something...?

Oregon early voting returns,
and I pushed the Waller call to .

What's the Waller call?

He wants to revisit
the foreign-policy stuff.

Wants Waller to weigh in
on Israel.

- That's not gonna happen.
- He was adamant.

Cancel it.

Okay? We're late.

- Annabeth said they'd be here soon.
- Yeah.

The congressman seems irritated.

- He's sleep-deprived like the rest of us.
- Sure.

Bartlet put his fist through a couple
of walls last week of the first campaign.

Where are we on Leno?

They've got this whole Robin Hood
Halloween skit they wanna do.

Robin Hood?

Santos talks about closing
tax loopholes for the rich.

Leno asks what he was for Halloween.
They cut to a bit...

...of the congressman trick-or-treating
in a Robin Hood costume.

I was thinking
maybe without the tights?

- Tights? My husband in tights?
- Mrs. Santos.

- Lock up the women's vote.
- You've never seen his legs.

- We're late. If we...
- Yeah.

- Where are my kids?
- They're in the press van.

They're getting a head start
on trick-or-treating.

- Oh, that's great.
- Mrs. Santos!

Not the best place
for me right now, huh?

If someone wouldn't mind checking...

...to make sure my kids are not
in a diabetic coma...

- I'm on it.
- Great.

- Oh, sweet Lord in heaven.
- Yeah.

About the Robin Hood sketch?

He's already showing the felons the love.
We don't need him to dress up like one.

- So how should I handle Leno?
- Come up with something funnier.


Trust me, you'll be happier.

Toby?

Yeah?

One out of every eight African-American
men are unable to vote.

It's clearly an issue.

Thanks. Oh, absolutely.

Excuse me?

No, we've had a lot of people out for
the rallies. I think we're doing all right.

- Six hundred lawyers in Florida.
- Leo wanted to double it.

- Gotta be a joke there somewhere.
- Some of this is routine.

Machines don't work,
folks are turned away.

We'll want lawyers
to keep the polls open.

- We've got legal briefs.
- We drafted those...

...in case we need to contest
the battlegrounds.

- Right.
- We'd rather things go smoothly...

...on Election Day, which is why
we mobilized , lawyers.

But the polls in Pennsylvania and Ohio,
they're really pretty close.

We need to be prepared
for a court battle.

Congressman, we're pulling
into Dayton.

Dayton. Thanks.

You ever get nostalgic
for the good old days?

When there was just
a winner and a loser?

Talk to my Republican friends in Chicago.
The good old days weren't really.

- How about a Top Ten list?
- That's Letterman.

- He's funny.
- Yeah.

What are you guys doing?

Trying to come up with a bit for Leno.

Something that doesn't
involve a costume.

- Does he play an instrument?
- That's not a bad idea.

He could jam with the band.

Congressman, do you play
a musical instrument?

Clarinet.

Yeah, that's not gonna work.

- Don't get into it with the Vinick masks.
- Thanks.

I've been holding
for the vice president for half an hour.

Can you please...? Sir, you need to...

Hi. Yeah, this is Matthew Santos.
Could you possibly...?

Turn on CNN. I'll wave.

Yeah. Oh, oh,
I appreciate your support.

Now, do you think you can possibly
find the vice president?

Thank you. Oh, no.
I'm gonna wait.

Happy Halloween.

Sorry to drag you away
from your kids.

Well, as long as you're willing
to explain it to my wife.

You did drag me down here
for a reason?

You're a pretty ambitious guy, huh?

What are you, , ?

Peter Blake, U.S. Attorney for
the District of Columbia. What's next?

Congress? The Senate?
A seat on the federal bench?

What happens when you sit down
with the DNC chair...

...in two years?
- You're kidding.

A congressional race
you wanna throw your hat in.

I'm wondering what
Mr. Chairman's thinking about.

- You're here to lecture me.
- Your Rhodes scholarship?

- Your performance on law review?
- I'm going to the grand jury.

No, you're not. You're not gonna
do this. It's wrong and it's irresponsible.

Irresponsible? How about chief of staff
of the United States...

...sharing classified information
with an unauthorized individual...

- That's not what happened.
- A deposition from Babish says that.

- She asked me a hypothetical question.
- You discussed the existence...

...of a secret m*llitary shuttle with Cregg.
You didn't have clearance, she did.

Now, it doesn't take a rocket scientist
to figure out what happened.

Tell me I didn't leave a crying -year-old
in a Dorothy costume for this.

- Keep them trick-or-treating.
- Hold the Houston crowd.

- Half-hour, tops.
- Hour and a half?

- Yes, both kids.
- He was mayor.

We need more than
a homemade banner.

You know, Advance promised us
, people.

Sure. It's : .

- I'll call you back.
- Call you back? Thank you.

Five days out and I'm wasting time
with Bob Russell.

Is he onboard?

He gives me a song and dance about
the other candidates he's stumping for.

- He said no?
- Oh, he didn't say no. He can't say no.

So we're gonna need surrogates
to take his place in Ohio.

Say, am I gonna get any time
with McNally before this day is over?

- Soon as we get back on the bus.
- Oh, yeah? And then what?

I get the minutes between here
and the airport to figure out...

...the impact of Kazakhstan on
our long-term foreign-policy approach?

- More or less.
- Get me Edie, please.

Try to make it look like you're
enjoying your time with the children.

- Hey.
- Sweetheart.

Sorry I'm late.

How are the spoils?
Whoa, that's a lot of candy there.

- My stomach hurts.
- Okay. Let me carry that.

- Can we go now?
- Just one more house, honey.

Okay? Come on. Here we go.

What, did you guys
raid the candy store?

Between the press and
the houses we've been at...

I'm sorry.

Who thought ice cream
was a good idea?

Well, you know,
it's been a bit of a day.

- Right here?
- I made a factual statement.

- It's not like I was banging on a drum.
- Helen, come on.

It wasn't your fault. Annabeth shouldn't
have left you out there on your own.

- Now that we got that cleared up.
- I said it wasn't your fault.

If you were concerned about me
opening my mouth...

...you shouldn't have sent me
to the damn event.

What do we have here?

Oh, my.

This is perfect.

C.J.'s got a problem. The president's
not doing what she wants him to do.

She does what she's done before.

She talks to you. Maybe she thinks
you have clearance or knows you don't.

Maybe she has no idea
that you're gonna leak it.

But you do. She's screwed.
It's your fault, you fall on the grenade.

- It wasn't C.J.
- Okay. What about Leo?

It wasn't Leo.

Toby, there was someone else.

You weren't authorized
to have that information.

All right, I assume we're done here.

"A citizen's safety lies in the prosecutor
who approaches his task with humility."

Justice Robert Jackson.

Your position is of such
independence and importance...

...that while being diligent, strict
and vigorous in law enforcement...

...you can also afford to be just.

It's my responsibility
to find out who helped you.

- That's my job!
- You can indict me.

Can thr*aten to put me
in federal prison for six years.

You can subpoena the president,
subpoena Leo McGarry, C.J. Cregg.

You can undermine a presidential election
and it won't change anything!

I'm still not gonna change my story!

- And that's it?
- Yeah, that's it.

I've dedicated my life to this country,
to public service.

Regardless of our
different interpretations...

...of the role of the prosecutor
in our legal system...

...I don't think derailing a presidential
election is part of your job description.

And I don't think
you believe it is either.

Okay, Leno puts on a Vinick mask,
steals a bag of Halloween candy.

Then the congressman comes in wearing
a police uniform and arrests him.

Not funny at all, huh?

Maybe we should go back
to the clarinet.

Damn it. We're not gonna
make it to Houston till .

Cancel the rally?

You think we could get another sh*t
at the trick-or-treating photo op?

- We're nowhere on Leno.
- Annabeth have any ideas?


- Annabeth likes the tights.
- Yeah.

Yeah, I know. It's okay, buddy.

We'll be home in just a few hours.

No, I got him, honey.

Come on. Come sit.

Can I maybe get some coffee?

- Where's McNally?
- Sir?

Nancy McNally, NSA.

We were starting to get into
the ramifications...

...of long-term troop deployment
in Kazakhstan.

- Right, she had an early meeting in D.C.
- She left?

- Nancy McNally left.
- Yes, sir.

- She had a meeting.
- Can we get her on the phone?

Sure. Sir, there's an issue
with The Tonight Show.


- The Tonight Show?
- Leno's got this idea.


It involves a Robin Hood costume.
We're not that wild about the costume...

Look, I need to get McNally
on the phone.

I've got a conference call
with Hal Waller at .

Think this is
the best use of my time?

It's all right. I canceled the call.

- Excuse me?
- The Waller call. I canceled it.

We've already pushed through
the foreign-policy section of the stump.

Half-hour conference call
on the Mideast...

We're gonna wind up
with , men in Kazakhstan.

We're gonna have to pull at least
, soldiers out of Israel.

That is gonna change our entire
Mideast peacekeeping timetable.

Which is why Otto and
the speechwriting team are working...

We're looking at three to four years
in Central Asia!

That is an entire presidency!

Otto and the speechwriting team
have barely scratched the surface.

- You want me to...?
- No.

No, I got it.

We need to start addressing
the real issues...

...and stop wasting time
on the beauty-pageant ephemera.

You know as well as I do that right now,
what you say on Leno...


...and how your family looks
are more important than...

- We need to focus!
- We are.

You like Goodwin and McNally?

Well, it's not like I had
a lot of time with McNally.

Berryhill had five minutes
years ago. You like her?

- Yeah, I do.
- Goodwin?

Great. We got an attorney general
and a secretary of state.

That's not bad for a three-state,
six-market day.

Now we're gonna have
this conversation about Leno...


...then you're gonna talk to Nancy,
then make up with your wife...

...so we have a relatively happy couple
for the rally in Houston.

Congressman?

Yeah.

Good.

- Josh?
- Yeah?

You think we're gonna win?

I do.
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