06x08 - O Mother Where Art Thou?

[bunniefuu]

When I was a kid,

art was just a bunch
of old white guys from Europe

painting other old white guys.

And then I saw my first Basquiat.

It was art,

but it was also confrontational,

revolutionary,

and somehow undeniably black.

It changed everything for me,

and because of that,
my house is festooned

with the works of prominent
African-American artists.

"Soul Power" by Fahamu Pecou.

A bold painting by a bold artist.

Oh, I love this one
because it tells the world

that black people can swim,

even though I can't.

And this is one of the last pieces

the great Noah Davis did
before he passed away.

And the man who did Obama's portrait

did my T-shirt,

because Kehinde Wiley is smart enough

to get paid while he's still alive.

Good morning, family.

- Morning, babe.
- Mm.

Notice anything different about me?

Hmm. You're getting less needy?

- No, that can't be that.
- Mm.

How is it possible

that in a house so full of people,

I can feel so alone... and so cold?

Dre?

Is this an original Noah Davis?

Oui, Lynette.

I never knew

- you were an art lover.
- Oh.

Lynette loves anything
that gets better with age, son.

Wine, art, moi.

I have a bachelor's degree
in Visual Arts from Spelman.

I wanted to study Art History,

but they talked me out of it.

- Oh, boy.
- One of the last things

- me and Ruby agreed on.
- Mm-hmm.

That and that cheese is not a dessert,

no matter what Europe says.

We did you a favor, son.

Name me one successful Black artist.

Unh-unh. Besides the guy who
makes them happy little trees.

Mama, I keep telling you,
we cannot claim Bob Ross

just because he has an afro.

He ain't one of us.

Well, I'm gonna have to see
his mama before I'm convinced.

- Believe. That right?
- Think about it.

Hey.

This is what I was born into.

Well, Dre, don't listen to them.

- Thank you.
- You and Rainbow have great taste.

Okay, first off, Rainbow has
horrible taste. That's all me.

All right?

She wanted to hang
stupid family pictures up.

Whoa, wait.
You chose all those paintings?

I thought they came with the house.

I tried to take these philistines

to the Kerry James Marshall
exhibit, but no.

They wanted to go to a birthday party

at a trampoline park.

The trampoline park had pictures
of people on the trampoline.

That's art, too, Dad.

And I got to see the Mona Lisa
of ankle breaks.

- Mm-mh.
- The way his wife laughed

after he hurt himself?

- They're probably divorced by now.
- Oh, yeah.

Andre, if you ever want
to talk about art,

you can do it with me.

Really?

Oh, it is one of my favorite things.

- I am a member at LACMA...
- Ooh.

...The Hammer, The Broad...

The California African American Museum?

I have a plaque at the plaza.

A plaque in the plaza?

Right between George Lucas' wife

and Robert De Niro's wife.

This... is amazing.

Lynette, you're amazing!

Okay, okay, okay.

Get your own fiancée.

- She's amazing, Pops.
- We have to go now.

Lynette has to referee
the Urban League's

annual charity basketball game.

- Oh. Okay.
- Say goodbye, baby.

Oh, bye.

But I loved catching up with you.

Oh. I love you, too.

- What'd you say?
- I... I-I...

As in the band, U2.

I love U2, UB40, Us3,

- anything with a "U" in it, Pops.
- Mm-hmm.

"You Be Illin'."

Yeah! Huh!

Get off me!

No! Get away!

I've got pepper spray!
I've got pepper spray!

Wait... What...

No, Mom, Mom, I'm... I'm fine.

It's... It's just a game.

Right now, I'm defending
a children's hospital

from the undead.

- Seen a lot of awful things in those halls.
- Hmm.

- But I've also seen a lot of hope.
- Hmm.

You want to join?

Oh, I'd love to, but no. Mnh-mnh.

I just made myself a pot of tea,

and I'm gonna read a book.

Uh, come on, Mom.

We both have the day off.

Wouldn't it be great to do

some mother-son zombie-busting?

Okay, well, we can agree
to disagree on that one...

...and you can agree
to put all of this...

back when you're done.

- Okay.
- Yeah?

I promise I will put
everything back perfectly

as soon as all of the children
are safe and sound.

- Whatever.
- Okay?

All right.

We are back in the ga...

Uhp. I'm dead.

All right.

Hey, guys. This is good news.

The vape industry will pay us
a lot of money

if we can rehabilitate their image

by proving their product
is not for kids.

Now, how do we market

gummy-bear-flavored tobacco for adults?

Go.

Chewy smoke.

Okay, Dre, what do you got?
You got something?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

I just got a text from Lynette.

Oh, okay.

So, it finally happened, huh?

What finally happened?

You got yourself a mistress.

- Well done.
- What? No, man.

Lynette is my father's fiancée.

- Oh.
- Oh. Oh. I'm sorry.

No, we're both fans of Black art.

- Okay. Sorry.
- Oh.

So am I.

- Word?
- Yeah.

Airbrushed pictures of dead rappers,

Maya Angelou quotes on plywood
in pretty fonts,

oil paintings of naked women in afros

posing with various big cats.

Okay, that's not what
I was talking about, Charlie.

I'm talking about Black artists.

- Oh.
- Fine artists

whose works are in museums.

You know, like Charles White,
uh, and Emory Douglas.

You guys know
who I'm talking about, right?

Obviously, we don't know them, Dre.

And the fact that you're even asking

makes me wonder if you even know us.

Okay.

How about Basquiat?

Everybody knows Basquiat.

- Mm.
- The cheese?

This is insane.

You don't know
who Jean-Michel Basquiat is?

He brought street art
into the fine art world

decades before Banksy.

Uh... Kara Walker's
nightmarish silhouettes

tells the story
of American sl*very and racism.

- So sad.
- I'm sorry, I don't... I don't know.

This is where I am.

I can't talk to one person
about one of my greatest loves.

Sweaters?

- Cannolis?
- Art.

You know what? This is crazy.

You know what?
I'm just gonna call Lynette

and ask her if she wants
to go to a gallery.

She understands me.

You go, Dre.

You go be with her.

And while you're at it...

bring me back a painting
of a woman with a white tiger.

Matter of fact, here's $40.

Get me one that lights up.

So, Lynette and I got together,

and going to a gallery

with someone
who loved art as much as I did

was everything I hoped it would be.

It was a great day,

and there was one way
to make it perfect.

It's been a minute

since I've been
to The Cheesecake Machine.

This is me and my mama's favorite spot.

You know, I love how they put
a whole fried chicken

on a leaf of iceberg

and call it a salad.

It's hard to find a 5,000-calorie
salad in this town.

It ain't Georgia.

I see somebody's eyes
were bigger than his stomach.

I told you not to fill up on that bread.

Now, we have a bit of a ride
to get back home.

When was the last time
you went to the bathroom?

I went at the gallery.

Did you?

Okay, you know what? You're right.

I-I should go right now.

- Well, hol... hol... hold on.
- Mm?

There's just a little something...

- ...just right there.
- Where? Uh-huh?

- Ooh.
- Mnh.

- Got it.
- Oh.

Thank you, Mama.

I mean Lynette.

Uh-oh. I'm not cheating on my wife.

I'm cheating on my mother.

Whoa! What's happening, Black Jesus?!

- Wow.
- Mm.

- You're cheating on your mother.
- Ah.

- Congratulations.
- Okay.

You moved past Oedipal
and created your own complex.

Okay, here's the thing about it, Bow.

Hmm?

- I kind of liked it.
- Ew.

It felt so right.

Lynette does a thing for me.

Mm.

This is like the worst
Shakespeare play ever.

No, babe, we had a great day.

- Mm.
- We genuinely connected over art.

I didn't realize how much I was
missing it until I found it.

Aww.

Well... too bad you're gonna
have to drop her.

'Cause you know your mom
is easily threatened.

What?

I'll just top this off for you.

- Okay.
- The hell you will.

You don't know how my baby
likes his beer poured.

Go on, get out of here.

Okay.

Here, baby.

- You all right?
- Yes, Mama.

She's mellowed.

All right, look at how she's handling

Pops' and Lynette's relationship.

She's not threatened.

You're just saying that, Dre,

'cause you want to keep
hanging out with Lynette.

No, Bow, I...

I want you to see it from
my mother's perspective.

- Okay.
- Okay?

It's half the work, and she
doesn't always have to be on.

Everybody wins.

It's a win-win-win.

Okay, I've expressed my concerns,

and I've told you how I think
this is going to turn out.

So I have no guilt in allowing you

to walk into this situation.

But...

God bless you.

- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.

- Oh. Hey, Mama.
- Ooh.

Um, I'm going to the museum
with Lynette and the kids,

and I would love for you
to come with us.

Oh. Oh, oh, sorry.

I got my earbuds in.

What did you say, sweetie?

I said I'm going to the museum
with Lynette and the kids,

and I want you to come.

Sure. Sounds great.

- Does it?
- Yeah, sounds like fun.

Look at my baby.

Taking his children and his mama out

for a day at a classy museum.

- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, boo.

- Mwah.
- Mwah.

- Thank you, Mama.
- Proud of you, baby.

- Thank you.
- Uh-huh.

Having two mamas is gonna be great.

Hmm.

Uh... how do you feel

about adding an extra wife
to this situation?

I mean, you know,
you always talk about how,

you know, you hate doing the laundry.

I just feel we could... you kn...

Okay. I was just, you know...

Like I said, I was just, um...

just asking for a friend.

- How's the book, Mom?
- Aah! Ah.

Hey. Hey.

Hey, Junior. It's good.

Yeah, it's really, really good.

- Yeah, it looks like a real page-turner.
- Uh-huh.

- It's all right.
- Mom, I know you're a book person,

but you should try this.

- VR is an incredible stress reliever.
- Oh, come on.

Okay.

I don't know if I'm gonna get into this.

Die!

Die, you zombie jerks!

I'll see you in Hell!

This is all I ever wanted.

It was all happening.

I was on a date with my art mom
and my birth mom.

It was the type of thing
dreams are made of.

♪ My chérie amour ♪

- Mmm.
- Aww.

- ♪ Lovely as a summer day ♪
- Mmm.

You want some ice cream
with that pie, baby?

Bow says I have to cut back
on the dairy.

You see any Rainbows
around here, Lynette?

Clear skies from what I can see, Ruby.

- Shall we, Dre?
- Put it in my mouth.

Ah!

Mmm. Mmm!

Mmm!

- Mom mom mom mom.
- Yes! Oh!

♪ Mom mom mom mom ♪

♪ Mom mom ♪

- Dre. Dre.
- Huh? Hmm?

The hell is wrong with you, boy?

Nothing, Pops. It's... It's all good.

It's all very good.

Hey, guys, where should we start first,

upstairs or downstairs?

- Upstairs.
- Downstairs.

Okay, you know what? I'll choose.

Let's go to the sculpture garden.

- Okay.
- Okay.

This will be fun.

You just got to get into the spirit.

Why are you so on board with this?

You think Lynette is the first woman

to drag me into a museum?

Look, she's not even the first woman

to drag me into this museum.

I've learned as a black man of my age

that there are certain subjects

that people assume I know a lot about...

jazz, boxing, ribs, the w*r...

- Which w*r?
- It doesn't matter.

Once a brother gets a few
gray hairs in his head,

white people just assume you're wise.

Why do you think Morgan Freeman
has played God so many times?

'Cause he's got that old Black magic.

So, you could just lie to people?

No, I don't just lie to people.

I use their assumptions about me
against them.

Mm, I don't think people
are that gullible, Pops.

Watch and learn, Jack, my boy.
Watch and learn.

This piece leaves me cold.

Well, you have to admit

the artist does have
masterful control of the medium.

You know, I didn't notice that before.

Now I feel like an idiot.

Did I see you open for Herbie Hancock?

I'm just here with my family today.

So let's just keep it our secret.

The interesting thing about this piece

is that it's all about
the objectification

of the Black male body.

- Mm.
- Well, there's not much to objectify.

Ma... Mama, come on.

Well, I'm just saying, there should
be a little more "there" there.

- You know what I mean?
- Amen.

- Come on, now. You know what I'm saying.
- "Amen"? Huh?

Like a little, old penis, okay?

I don't know about you,

but I think this artist shows
amazing control of the medium.

Mm-hmm. Absolutely.

The medium is totally controlled.

Amazingly.

Aww.

That's so adorable.

You kids have no idea
what you're talking about.

Excuse me.

I think what they meant to say

is that this particular artist

shows amazing control of the medium.

Oh.

I see it now.

Hey, I don't know why,

but I feel comfortable asking you...

I haven't talked to my dad in 15 years.

Should I call him?

Let's talk about it, son.

And I said, "Well, in this house,

your name is O'Shea Jackson,

and no, you cannot have another soda."

Look at us,

two single mothers who raised Black sons

in Los Angeles in the '80s.

Oh, we went through a lot.

Yeah. The riots.

- Mm.
- O. J.

Ooh.

- The Kobe-Shaq beef.
- Mm.

Oh, that one
almost tore my family apart.

But we survived it all.

There should be streets named after us.

Ruby Boulevard.

Lynette Avenue.

I know.

Dre, three bread baskets
at The Cheesecake Machine,

and not once did you tell me
all the things we had in common.

- Well...
- Wait a minute. What was that?

Mama, she's joking, all right?

We talked about you the entire time.

No, no, no. Not that part.

You took her to The Cheesecake Machine?

Yeah.

The one on Sepulveda?

Yeah. That... That's the closest one.

You could've taken her to sushi
or some other nonsense,

but instead, you took her to our place?

If she wants to go, you let
her son Doug take her.

- I...
- That tacky-ass restaurant

is where you take your mother!

You betrayed me!

Oh. Oh, oh, oh. Come here.
Oh, I see you, I see you!

Okay, I don't have

the energy for whatever this is.

So, I had made a mistake

and got too comfortable
with my side mom.

Now there was hell to pay.

Ma?

Brought you some Rolos.

Your favorite.

You can just leave them on the table.

Look. Hey, Mama.

I'm sorry I took Lynette
to The Cheesecake Machine.

I didn't know.

How could you not know

that The Cheesecake Machine
was our place?

Ma, because it's everybody's place.

It's the one thing
that everybody agrees on.

If they put one in the Middle East,

I think everything would be good.

But still, it was something special

just between the two of us.

I don't know if you've noticed,

but your tastes have changed.

Ever since you went off to college

and started experiencing a world
outside of what I know,

I've been losing parts of you.

Mama, that's not true.

Ah, yes, it is, Dre.

But still...

I guess it's also just a part of life.

I don't want to be
the reason you don't grow.

I've adjusted to you living
in Sherman Oaks.

Mm.

And I've adjusted to Rainbow
being in the house.

I guess I'm just gonna have to adjust

to sharing you with another woman.

I'm glad you've got an art friend.

- You are?
- Mm.

I really am.

Come here.

These saved your life.

So, Mom was cool with me
hanging out with Lynette.

But something still felt off.

All right, Mom, I have got my headset,

and I'm ready to go.

Uh, Mom, are...
are you dead in the game?

Are you dead in life?

Shh.

Junior, I b*at the game.

I made my way to Catalina

and k*lled every damn zombie
on this island.

Once I was safe,
I dragged over this couch,

found a copy of my book,
and put my feet up.

Come on. Join me.

Let's relax together.

Oh, yeah, this is nice!

I bet we could find a golf cart
and go for a joy ride.

I could get used to it here.

Please, sweetie, don't make me ice you.

You're right, Mom.
Let's just do it your way.

Let's relax.

Love you.

Love you.

Even though Mama said she was fine,

I could tell she needed
some more convincing.

- Hey, Mama.
- Hey.

You remember that poster
I had on my wall as a kid?

You know, the one from "Good Times"?

Ah, yeah.

The one with all them Negroes sinning?

So you do remember it.

You know that was the
first piece of art I owned?

Oh, Dre. You know I only
bought that to cover up

the hole I punched in your wall

after they canceled "St. Elsewhere."

You know, it doesn't matter why.

What matters is that
no corner of my life

has not been inspired by you.

Aww.

I mean, Mama, you may not have
taught me about art,

but you showed me how
to be passionate about the arts.

All that time we spent
listening to records,

you don't think
that had an effect on me?

Mm.

Mama, everything I am is because of you.

- Oh, I know.
- Mm. Are you sure?

Mm.

Because you will always be
my number-one girl.

Ain't no competition.

So, you don't want to take Lynette

to the gospel brunch
at the House of Blues?

- No, I don't.
- Mm.

In fact...

I've cleared my schedule.

So, if you want to go to the
Farmer's Market, let's go.

If you want to go to church, let's go.

But it will be just the two of us.

All right, then.

- I already know.
- Hmm?

I want to go to The Cheesecake Machine.

Done.

In Palm Springs.

- Palm Springs?
- It's a new one!

They just opened, Dre.

There's not even any graffiti
in the bathroom yet.

Yeah, that's...
that's more of a weekend.

Great! Then we'll make
a whole weekend of it, Dre.

You go tell your wife.

I'll start packing.

Rainbow, we're going away
for the weekend!

You can't come!

And next, we have...

this self portrait by James Adams.

As with all the other paintings
that we've seen today,

you might notice that this piece

clearly displays his trademark
control of the medium.

Excuse me.

I don't recognize you.

Are you one of our docents?

That depends. What's a docent?

Security?

No need. I'll let myself out.

Remember, control of the medium
is within all of you.

Well, that sucks. He was our ride.