01x04 - The Happy Roswaal Mansion Family

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Re: Zero, Starting Life in Another World". Aired April 26, 2012- present.*
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Series based on Japanese light novel centers around Subaru a hikikomori who suddenly finds himself transported to another world on his way home from the convenience store.
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01x04 - The Happy Roswaal Mansion Family

Post by bunniefuu »

I don't know this ceiling.

[SUBARU] The wound on
my stomach... it's gone.

All things considered,
it must've been Emilia.

And that healing
power she has...

Well, at any rate,
looks like I was able

to get out of using Return
by Death this time around.

Even so, isn't it
normal to wake up

and see a girl by your bed
asking, "Are you awake?"

after she spent all
night caring for you

while you were
asleep and healing?

Kinda lame for a story
about being summoned

into another world...

[SUBARU]
A looping hallway, huh?

I bet I can't get out until
I find the right room.

The typical pattern dictates the
first door is likely the goal!

What a profoundly irritating

and aggravating man
you are, I suppose.

The first NPC found!

You're gonna ruin
your cute little face

with that cold
attitude of yours.

Come on, smile! Smile for me!

The only smile appropriate to
give you is a derisive sneer.

Are you upset because I guessed
the right door on the first try?

I've always been pretty lucky

when it comes to
stuff like that.

I can understand why game
masters would want me

to see all the cut
scenes... but sorry!

So what is this place, anyway?

[BEATRICE]
Betty's multi-purpose room,

which serves as a library
and bedroom, I suppose.

Man, talk about
your token response.

So are you one, uh,
those manual girls?

[BEATRICE] Betty has had
just about enough of you.

I think it's time to teach
you a lesson I suppose.

Hang on, wh-what are
you gonna do to me?

Stay right there, and
don't you dare move.

Anything you'd like to say?

How about, "Don't hurt me"?

[screams]

[SUBARU] What did you do to
me, you drill-haired loli?

Oh, nothing much.

I only collected the mana
from your body, I suppose.

By doing so, I've confirmed
that you are not an enemy.

You little freak.
You're not human, are you?

I mean, outside of your
sparkling personality.

Took you long enough
to notice, I suppose.

[SUBARU]
I take it back.

Your personality
isn't human, either.

[BEATRICE] Do not measure
a proud, noble being

such as myself by your
standards, human.

I know this ceiling.

[REM]
Oh, he has awakened, Sister.

[RAM]
Indeed, he's awakened, Rem.

Hard to believe a
total night owl like me

can wake up so early.

I'm getting all emotional.

I should probably go to
sleep a second time.

No, wait a sec.

I woke up earlier, so that
would make this the third.

[REM] My, what a deadbeat
thing to say.

Did you hear that, Sister?

[RAM] Truly the words of a
loser. I heard him, Rem.

Hey!

Who are these two voices that
keep criticizing me in stereo?!

N-No way...

Short-skirted maid costumes
exist in this world, too?!

[SUBARU]
In my mind, maids were always

the very personification
of elegance.

This is gonna be awesome!

[REM] What terrible thoughts
this one is having.

You are being
repeatedly violated

in the mind of
our guest, Sister.

Truly terrible, indeed.

You're experiencing the
ultimate shame over and over

in the mind of our guest, Rem.

Don't underestimate the
capacity of my mind.

You're both fair prey in
my fantasies, little maids!

[knocking]

Seems like you can't even wake
up without causing a commotion.

Huh, Subaru?

[SUBARU] Whoever picked that
outfit definitely gets it!

I'm not even going
to pretend to know

what you're talking about,
but the fact that I know

it's something stupid
is disappointing.

Listen to this, Miss Emilia.

Without provocation,
my dear sister

was just violated by that man.

Please listen to
this, Miss Emilia.

Rem was just held prisoner
and shamed by that man.

That's enough, you two.
Don't tease him so much.

Yes, of course, Miss Emilia.
My sister is very sorry.

Yes, of course, Miss Emilia.
Rem's sorry, as well.

Tell me, are you
feeling all right today?

Does anything feel "off" to you?

[SUBARU]
Huh?

Nah. Just a bit groggy
from oversleeping.

So you were the one who saved
me, isn't that right, Mee-Lee?

Huh? "Mee-Lee"?

Why would you call me that?

Uh, it's just a
nickname, no big deal.

Seriously, though.
Thank you. You saved me.

Not at all.

Honestly, I'm the one who
should be thanking you.

You barely even know me,

but you still risked your life
in order to protect mine.

It's only natural I'd
heal your wounds

after something like that.

Well, then once again,

I guess it's time to go out
and start a brand new day!

[SUBARU]
This place is really huge.

This isn't a yard,
it's more like a field.

Those movements
are quite unusual.

What are you doing?

My homeland's ancient practice

of warm-up exercises
and calisthenics.

Come on!

You should try and
do 'em with me, Mee-Lee!

Routine number 2!

Bounce briskly on both feet
to loosen up your body!

Huh? You're kidding!
That's weird!

Just do whatever I'm doing.

I'll drill the essence of radio
calisthenics into you, okay?

[SUBARU]
Now, raise both your arms

and shout, "Victory!"

V-Victory!

[PUCK]
Victory! Victory!

Victory!

Hi there, Subaru!
Great morning, isn't it?

Well, to be completely honest,

it's been nothing
but total chaos

from the minute I woke up.

There were looping hallways

and a mean little
girl on a rampage...

And after that, shedding
the sweat of passion

with Mee-Lee.

There's no need to make
it sound so scandalous.

Good morning, Puck.

Really sorry I put you through
so much yesterday.

Morning, Lia.

I came really close to losing
you back there, didn't I?

I'll never be able to
thank Subaru enough.

I think I should do
something for him.

Yeah?

Okay, let me pet your fur
whenever I feel like it!

Huh? Is that seriously
all you want?

For a first-rate fur
master such as myself,

being able to love on the object
of your petting affections

any time you want is
worth just as much

as the troves of a
multimillionaire's riches!

[SUBARU]
Oh, man, these ears!

I'm so in love with how
soft and cuddly you are.

I know you feel that way since
I can kinda read your mind,

but I'm amazed you
can actually say it!

It's okay, Lia.

'Cause I can't find
any trace of hostility

or malice in him at all.

It's so cute how you
call her "Lia," too.

It's not half as cute as
when you call her "Mee-Lee."

You really are a
strange one, Subaru.

[SUBARU]
Huh?

Well, look at this.
What brings you two here?

[BOTH]
Miss Emilia.

Our lord, Master Roswaal,
has finally returned home.

Please come inside.

[BEATRICE]
I was watching you from upstairs

and you know what?

It would appear that you are
quite the imbecile I suppose.

[SUBARU] And just where do you
get off saying that, you loli?!

What does that word mean?

I've never even heard it
before and it irritates me.

I think you just made it up.

Betty, haven't seen
you in four days.

Hope you've been doin'
well and staying ladylike!

Hello, Bubby!

I've been waiting so eagerly
for you to come home!

Will you stay with me
today, do you suppose?

Yeah, sure, no problem.

Today's the day we can
finally relax together.

Aww, this'll be great!

Feeling bewildered, aren't you?

Beatrice is so taken with Puck;
she can't get enough.

I can't believe you just said
"bewildered" unironically.

[ROSWAAL] My, my! How unusual
to see you here, Beatrice!

I'm so happy you're
dining with me.

I do ever so love your company
and treasure our times together!

That boy is more than enough

addle-brained fool
for me, I suppose.

Betty was only waiting
around for Bubby!

[SUBARU] Wow, so you
guys hired a clown

to entertain you
before each meal?

I'll never understand
how you rich folks think.

U-Um, Subaru?
That man is actually--

Oh, no, it's quite
all right, Miss Emilia.

I'll handle the introductions.

What's going on?

I am, in fact, the lord of this
manor, Roswaal L. Mathers.

So very pleased to make
your acquaintance.

Subaru Natsuki, right?

This is way better
than normal food!

[ROSWAAL]
Mh-hm!

Despite her appearance, Rem's
cooking is quite impressive.

So this was cooked by the
one with the... blue hair?

I think I got that right.

You made this?

Yes, that's correct.

I'm responsible for all of the
cooking in this household.

My sister doesn't happen to
be very good at cooking.

Ah, so it's the old
"twins who are good

at different things" trope, huh?

So your sister good at
cleaning then, I take it?

Yes, that's correct.

My sister excels at
housework chores,

especially cleaning and laundry.

So while you're
good at cooking,

you're probably bad at cleaning
and laundry, right Rem-Rin?

On the contrary, I'm generally
good at all household tasks.

I'm also better at cleaning
and laundry than my sister.

[SUBARU] Seriously?! Does your
sister even have a purpose?!

You are truly a
unique young man.

You come to the mansion
of Margrave Mathers,

in the Kingdom of Lugunica,

and you say you don't
understand a thing.

So what do you mean by that?

Is something bad
happening in this country?

Well, it is not in
an agreeable state.

Which only makes sense.

After all, Lugunica
doesn't have a king.

Now don't look so alarmed,
there's no need to be concerned.

Everyone in this country
is already quite aware

of that circumstance
being their reality.

Wow, really?

I expected a "Now that
you know my secret,

I can't let you leave
here alive" thing.

[ROSWAAL]
Roughly around the same time

the king went into hiding,

an epidemic began to spread
throughout the castle.

The king and his children
are the last of his line.

At this moment, the nation
is being managed

by a council of wise men,

and that council is
currently in the process

of selecting a new king.

Okay, think I'm startin'
to get the picture now.

On top of the king's absence,

the royal selection is causing
confusion in the kingdom.

Suddenly, I appear
from another country--

Wait, I'm totally suspect here!

And on top of that, you made
contact with Miss Emilia,

thus initiating a direct
connection to my household.

Ahh, the dilemma.

Hey, hold on a second,

why would the lord of the
mansion call her "Miss Emilia"?

I'm not sure how things
are where you're from,

but here, we address those with
higher status resectfully.

But, uh, that would mean
Mee-Lee here is, uh...

Officially, my current title is:

Candidate for the 42nd ruler
of the Kingdom of Lugunica

with the backing of the
honorable Lord Margrave Roswaal.

What?!

Sorry to surprise you like that.

I wasn't trying to keep
it a secret or anything.

[SUBARU]
Hey, it's that insignia.

This qualifies one to be
a candidate for king.

It's a ceremonial touchstone
that's used to determine

if one is worthy to
sit at the throne

and lead this country
as a monarch.

Wait a second!

Are you saying you
lost an insignia

that qualifies you
to rule the kingdom?!

Now don't put it like that!
I didn't lose it!

It was stolen from
me by a thief!

That's the same thing!

And what happens if you manage
to lose that thing, anyway?

Will a government office
issue another one?

[ROSWAAL]
Oh, what a dreadful scenario!

If you'd lost it, then
there would be no doubt.

The belief would be that
one who can't even protect

a tiny insignia has no
business being entrusted

with the nation's rule
and that would be the end.

Well, knowing those facts,
I'd say I did a damn good job.

And it totally raises my
expectations for a nice reward.

Yeah, you're right about that.

You're a true savior to me
and I'm very thankful.

So ask me for anything.

Ah, yes, you heard the lady!

Any reward you desire!
Just name it!

[laughs]

[SUBARU] Well, in that case,
I have but one request.

I'm starting to
like this mansion.

Hire me to work here!

A-choo.

[EMILIA]
No, that's not quite right.

Wasn't there anything
else that fit, Subaru?

[SUBARU] Oddly, some of the
girls' stuff fit me, but...

Our deepest apologies on the
wardrobe, sir. I mean, Subaru.

I must say, you look
utterly ridiculous, sir.

I mean, Barusu.

[SUBARU]
Oh, good job, Ram.

You just turned my name
into a blinding curse.

Rem, notice anything about
Barusu's ludicrous appearance?

Well, the shoulders
fit him funny,

his legs are short,
and his eyes are scary.

Two of those are things I can't
do anything about, okay?!

[RAM]
We can't allow you to work here

in such shoddy-looking attire.

People would begin to question
Lord Roswaal's dignity.

Let us alter the jacket,
at the very least.

Rem, if you wouldn't mind...

If you'll excuse me, I have to
study for the royal selection.

Good luck with
your work, Subaru.

Yep! Leave it to me, Mee-Lee!

[ I'll take your measurements
for the fitting.

So stand still with
your back straight.

[gasps]

Please don't make strange
noises during this process.

It's unpleasant for me.

Unpleasant for you?

And that was beyond my control!

This is awkward for
a guy, you know!

[RAM]
This is the VIP room.

This is the bathing room.

This is the kitchen.

And this is the lavatory.

[SUBARU]
In a mansion like this,

I bet the restroom
is frikkin' huge.

My sweet Bubby. Oh.
Aww, I love your fur.

[BEATRICE grunts]

Don't worry, I won't
tell a soul about this.

The feel of that fur
would make anyone--

[SUBARU yells]

Ow! Come on, now let me
finish, you little--!

You just witnessed Miss
Beatrice's Door Crossing.

Oh, really?

So it's a spell that can connect

any door in the mansion to
her own room, is that it?

And once Miss Beatrice has
eliminated her presence,

there's no way to find her
without trying every door.

She's in here!

[BEATRICE screams]

Impressive, Subaru!

All right, how did you
pick the right door again?

Look, I told you
before, remember?

I'm a flag crusher who
makes game masters cry.

[BEATRICE] I have no idea
what you're talking about!

[SUBARU] Tell me, how do you
fit in around here, anyway?

You Roswaal's little sister?

I would never want to be
his sister, I suppose! Hmph!

Betty is the librarian
who oversees

the Roswaal Mansion's
forbidden library.

[RAM] Master Roswaal is
the greatest magic user

in the kingdom.

He has many books that
mustn't be seen by others.

And Miss Beatrice
has been contracted

to protect them
from prying eyes.

Understand now? Then go away.

[RAM] This concludes our
tour of the mansion.

So do you have any questions?


I know it's no use saying
this after it's over,

but don't you think
it would've made

a whole lot more sense
for Mee-Lee to be the one

to take me around
for the tour event?

If you have no questions,

then let's get to the ins
and outs of your job.

Basically, you'll be helping
with my work, Barusu.

This must be the moment
when my hidden skills

as a butler finally
reveal themselves!

[RAM]
My work today consists of caring

for the front yard and garden,

helping to prepare lunch,
polishing the silver,

airing out the futons,
doing the laundry,

cleaning the bathrooms,

and the mansion's
monthly soot cleaning.

[bell tolls]

[sighs] Oh... Finally...

[knocking]

[REM] This is Rem. Do you
have a moment, Subaru?

Sure, yeah, I'm good.

I won't do anything
weird, so come on in.

[REM] Your permission makes
you sound less credible.

Pardon me...

You already finished
the alterations?

When it's Lord
Roswaal's clothing,

I must be careful and precise,
but since this is yours...

[SUBARU] Wait, you cut
corners 'cause it's me?

I hate to admit it,
but it's perfect.

How do I look? Good, huh?

With this outfit over
the bizarre attire

that you were
originally wearing,

no one in any strange
garment could rival you.

[SUBARU]
Not a compliment at all!

And what shall we do with those?

[SUBARU] This one's easy.
Got a needle and thread?

Yes, I brought them.

Would you like me to
repair them for you now?

Nah, that'll be okay.
I can do it.

Don't underestimate
my sewing skills.

I'm honestly surprised.

I must give you full
marks for your sewing.

I'd like to add, however,
that much like you,

it doesn't appear
useful whatsoever.

[SUBARU]
Ow!

You may get full
marks for sewing,

but you're still useless
with a Kn*fe, Barusu.

As always, you make
such a lovely image

when peeling vegetables, Sister.

Your bias is so blatant,
it's almost comforting!

I'd like a comment on my work
too if you can muster one up!

[REM]
How about "I pity the farmer

who grew those vegetables"?

[SUBARU]
Stop being so cruel!

You're breaking my heart!

You don't know how to
handle a Kn*fe, Barusu.

You should hold it still and
simply turn the vegetable.

My best dish is steamed tatoes,
if I do say so myself.

How can you say that

with such a triumphant
look on your face?!

Damn it, just watch!

My favorite blade,
sh**ting Star,

will show you a thing
or two about slicing!

[SUBARU screaming]

[ROSWAAL] How has Subaru been
since he started working?

Five days have passed
since his arrival.

Shouldn't we be seeing
something by now?

[RAM] Cooking...
laundry... cleaning...

He's useless at all of them.

[ROSWAAL]
How very harsh of you.

And? What are the
chances he's a spy?

I can't deny that such
potential exists,

but I think the possibility
is slim, at best.

'Cause for better or for worse--

for worse, in this
case in particular--

he's too conspicuous.

And if he's too
conspicuous, then...

Well, despite the odds
of that possibility,

he certainly is
carefree, isn't he?

Personally, as I see it,

it would be wise to
interfere with things.

[RAM]
They're both only children.

Even if we let them be,
nothing will happen.

[EMILIA] It's not that
exciting to watch, is it?

You may think that,
but nothing's ever boring

when I'm hangin'
around you, Mee-Lee.

That's good to hear, even
if you're only flattering me.

Besides, the two of us haven't
had a chance to just talk

for the past few days, have we?

[EMILIA]
That's true.

Bet it must've been
difficult for you

to learn the work
expected of you here.

Ain't that the truth!
It's k*lling me!

I wish I could be tenderly
comforted in your arms,

your chest, and your
lap, in rotation.

If you can go around making
tasteless jokes like that,

you're probably fine.

Wow, the moon sure is pretty.

And it's up in the heavens,
far beyond our reach.

[SUBARU]
Well, what do you know?

I got a really touching
response without even trying!

On another matter,
don't you think

you're a bit lacking
in ambition?

Like that one time with Puck.

And in the capital, when
you asked for my name.

You just don't get me
at all, do you, Emilia?

I want what I want at
that exact moment,

and I want it from
the bottom of my heart.

It's self-gratification
in its purest form.

Huh?

Right then, I wanted to your
name more than anything.

I had no expectations
for tomorrow;

I was simply trying to
make it through the day.

And on top of that,
I was in a new land,

nervous and so uncertain
about my future.

Looking back on it, there
were probably other things

I should have wanted.

But I can't lie to myself
about things like that.

Same as the request I made to
Roz. I'm flat broke right now.

I could choose to cheat him out
of a fortune and live it up,

but I can just as easily obtain

an ongoing source
of livelihood, right?

In that case, why didn't
you simply choose

to become a permanent guest
rather than an employee?

I never thought of that!

[gasps]

Oh, man, what an idiot!

Talk about a
pathetic effort, huh?

Do you want me to
use my healing magic?

[SUBARU]
Nah, I'm fine like this.

Really? Why?

It's kinda for me to explain,
but... the way I see it,

this is proof of all the
effort I've been putting in.

I don't actually dislike
exerting myself, you know.

Learning to do something
I couldn't do before?

To be honest,
it's... not so bad.

Yes, I see. I would never've
thought of it that way.

You're such an idiot, Subaru.

Well, that wasn't the
reaction I was expecting.

Wasn't I charming?

You could never be.

Well, maybe just a little.

E.M.A...

Huh?

Oh, it's short for
"Emilia, Major Angel."

I was being so sincere, and now
you're joking around again?

Anyway, I know
you're working hard,

but how did your
hands get like that

just by doing some
household chores?

This hand I cut
with a kitchen Kn*fe.

And the one on the other hand

is from when I went to town
in the evening to shop,

and a little animal some kids
were playing with bit me.

It wasn't the result
of your labor efforts?

[SUBARU]
Those kids were ruthless,

hitting and kicking me, and
wiping their runny noses on me.

Gotta say, it kinda sucked.

You do seem like
the type of person

who'd be good with
small children, Subaru.

Hey, wait! I've got an idea!

Wanna come with me tomorrow to
get revenge on those little--

I mean, to watch the kids

and that small animal
play together?

It's not as if I don't want
to go out there with you...

Fine, then! Let's go!

But if-if I come along,

it might end up causing
a lot of trouble for you.

Okay, understood! Let's go!

Are you even listening to me?

I am, I swear!

I hang on every word
you say, Mee-Lee!

Fine, then.

But only when I'm able to take a
break from all of my studying

and your work is done
for the day, okay?

Yeah! All right!
This is gonna be great!

[BOTH laughing]

[SUBARU humming]

Hey, loli girl!
I see you're still up!

So now you can just casually
break through my Door Crossing

like it's natural, I suppose.

Well, I just wanted to say
hello before going to bed.

Can I try that, too?

[BEATRICE] Only Bubby has
permission to touch me,

I suppose.

Why should you get to
have all of the fun?

I'm in a good mood--

[BEATRICE]
Enough! Get out of here!

And that had nothing to do
with Betty, I suppose.

[SUBARU]
For our date tomorrow,

I'll have to come up
with a clever excuse

to ditch the kids
in the village.

Oh, but first, I've gotta find
out where all the good views

and flower fields and
other stuff are...

Crap! I can't sleep while
I'm thinkin' about this!

Oh, I know!

One Puck to pet...
Two Pucks to pet...

A hundred and one
Pucks to pet...

[SUBARU] A new dawn has
come across the land!

A dawn of hope!

Subaru Natsuki is going to
make giant strides today!

What are you two doing in here?!
This is so embarrassing!

You should've said something!

Sister, Sister, I do
believe that our guest

appears to be a bit confused.

What do you think?

Rem, Rem, yes I agree.

It looks as though our
guest has gone crazy.

Hey, why are you
calling me a guest?

You two and your
silly little jokes...

[SUBARU]
The wounds...

They're gone!
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