02x02 - Shortchanged

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "Shut Eye"...

Charlie?

I'm a fraud, a charlatan, a fake.

So what do they give me?

A real vision thing.

I saw the future, and I was afraid.

Well, I'm not afraid anymore.

I am.

I got children.

Can't we just f*cking go already?

Ma?

Return her personal effects,

and bring her to me
as quickly as possible.

Take care, Sharon.

I do hope your mother's chemo goes well.

Thanks, Rita.
What are you still doing here?

I needed a place to crash.
I know your door's always open.

You like it? I got it for you.

I f*cking hate you.

I woke up today a million dollars poorer

than I was yesterday.

Now, you're gonna make things
right financially.

She banished me.

She won't let me see my kids ever again.

The Marks family accepts
the ruling of the Kris.

And Simza's son, Li'I Tony,
and my granddaughter are married.

I will move into this new home
with my granddaughter.

Okay.
Thank you, Rita.

This is a noble sacrifice.

Where's my f*cking money?

$1.7 million in sequential bills,

so you'll have to launder them
before you can use them.

Until then, you got company.

This all of it?

That's what I earned this week.

Thanks, Carl.

Groovy, man. Catch you next time.

Good morning.

You left early. Should've woken me up.

Well, it looked like you'd
just finally gotten to sleep.

Mm.

Well, between your sister's
partying and your boss' snoring,

it's kinda hard to get a good
night's sleep around here.

He's not my boss. And you know Sylvia.

She's never around for long.

That's what you said about Fonso.

It's going on a week, Charlie.

He just wants to be close to his money.

Why doesn't he just take
his money and f*cking go?

You know why.
No gypsy will do business with him.

And if he doesn't clean his money,
the Feds will nail him.

Maybe that's not such a bad thing.

I know, I know.

"He goes down, we go down."

We just have to stay patient.

The plan is working.

Trust me on this.

I'm trying, honey.

sh*t!

Oh, my God.

Charlie?
Oh, my God.

Are you there?

Charlie?

Oh.

Oh!

Ah.

You think that's funny?

You think that's funny?!

f*ck you!

Mom, I'm gonna be late.

Go and wait outside.

Your aunt's driving you today.

Whatever.

Sylvia?
What?

Why is this door locked?

Because you and Charlie
let that shaved ape crash here.

I guess we'll let anything crash here.

I need you to drive Nick to school.

What, now?
Yes, now.

Gotta see a doctor.

You don't look sick.

Whatever.

Your mom, she's a piece of work.

Your mom, she's a piece of work, huh?

Yeah.

I mean, she treats me like I'm a kid.

I'm, like, twice your age.

I just wish they'd stop lying to me.

All they do is lie.

Yeah, well, comes with the territory.

Because they're con artists.

It's kinda more complicated than that,

but, uh, yeah, sorta.

No, they never tell me the truth.

Like, the other night, okay,
one minute, we're moving.

The next, we're driving to
the middle of f*cking nowhere.

Oh, sorry.

What, for saying "f*ck"?
I don't give a f*ck.

So we come all the way back

just so my dad can talk to Fonso
or something, right,

who's now sleeping on our couch!

Who the f*ck does that?!

Hey, man, at you got taken with.

I got left behind to fend for myself.

Yeah, I guess.

You know what? They're complicated.

I'm sure they're doing
the best they can.

It is what it is.

That's not an answer.

Yeah. It's not, is it?

I don't think so.

All right.

Okay, all right.

Mm.

Thanks for the ride.

Yeah.

I think you're coming down
with something.

I'm not.

You wanna have some fun today?

Huh?

Ah.

Okay.

Yeah?
Yeah, all right.

Okay.

892, 897, 907...

912, 922, 927...

$947.

Good.
Now write it in the book and add it up.

If I may?

His math is off.

You're gonna come up short

because you counted some $10s as $1s.

Why can't I use a calculator?

Your father never used a calculator.

Yeah, 'cause he didn't know how.

Take this into your father's office

and count it again.

Without a calculator!

How's he handling all this?

Better than me.

Fonso wanted me to tell you
he's thinking about you.

You've seen him?

He's sleeping on my couch.

I never would have thought he'd...

Stoop so low?

No offense.
None taken.

I'd really like to help him.

But to be respectful,
I'm still bound by White T.

Wait.

You'd like to help him?

I would like him out of my house.

Ah. That's more like it.

There's an ancient tradition,
goes back to Roman times.

The master of the house

would allow a faithful servant
to buy his freedom.

How much are we talking about?

It's hard to put a number on it, but...

$50,000 should be reasonable.

Hmm.

I think $100,000
would be more reasonable.

$100,000 it is.

Tony! Get back in here!

It's the nicknames that piss me off.

"d*ck of Death" is my favorite.

Sorry.

Why not "Death d*ck Nick"?

It's got a better ring to it.

Come on, you gotta own it.
Then they can't hurt you.

You ever seen a shortchange?
A what?

Watch and learn, Death d*ck.

Death d*ck Nick, thank you very much.

Whatever. Watch my hands.

Hi.
Hey.

Uh, may I help you?
Yeah.

I was hoping you could do me a favor.

I've got, like, this big ol' wad of $1s.

Do you wanna just throw me
a $10 bill for 10 singles?

Sure.
Okay, awesome.

One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

There you go. Go ahead and recount them.

Uh...
Yeah.

One, two, three...

You know,
that's a really nice shirt on you.

Oh, thanks.

Yeah, it's a good color for your eyes.

Uh, there's only nine.
Are you serious?

Oh, my God. I am so sorry.

I think I need a little more coffee.

10... there you go.

Actually, you know what?

I still have, like,
all of these singles.

Do you wanna just give me
a $20 for 20 singles,

because I feel like you
could make more use of them

than me, right? Uh, all right.

So 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15,

16, 17, 18, 19, 20.

There you go.

Well, thank you.
No, thank you.

Green is your color. Don't forget.

May I help you?

What just happened?

$10 more than I started with.

My turn.

So, do you remember what happened?

I think she lost about an hour.
Yeah, that's not uncommon.

The good news is,
she's alert and oriented now,

and her neurological exam is normal.

That's great.

I don't see any immediate need
for imaging.

Okay.
But I would wait a couple weeks

before trying any more rail slides.

And wear a helmet
next time you go 'boarding.

Tony Hawk did.

Who?

Uh, before your time.

So just monitor her
for the next couple of... days,

and, uh, you can just,
uh, call my office.

Why don't you have a seat
in the waiting area,

and we'll get you booked for a...
a follow-up.

Excuse me.

Dr. White, I-I just need a second.

Me, too.

Oh.

I am sorry.

Totally unprofessional of me.

I'm just experiencing a little bit of,
um...

Morning sickness?

Hmm.

Charlie told you I was pregnant.

He also told me how he knew.

What... What exactly did he say?

That he sees crazy f*cking wacky sh*t.

Like dreams, but awake.

Huh. Do they seem to have
increased in frequency?

These incidents?

I think he had one this morning
while he was driving,

but he wouldn't talk about it.

I'm afraid he's gonna hurt himself.

I need a cigarette.
Do you mind if I smoke in here?

I don't know if you heard,

but the Surgeon General has said that,
uh,

smoking is bad for you,
so that would be a no.

Uh...

Listen,
I wish I had an explanation for you.

I really do.

All I can say is that
throughout history,

there have been
numerous cases of people...

I know. I read your research.

I ran every test.

Some, honestly, not even in the realm

of what you might call
traditional neurology.

In the absence of any
identifiable medical condition,

we have to consider
alternative theories.

He's shutting me out.

It's f*cked up. I need you to fix him.

I don't...

I don't know that he's broken.

You fill his head with this bullshit,

and now you're telling me
that there's nothing you can do?

What kind of f*cking doctor are you?

Linda, please.
Can you just take a breath?

My family is falling apart.
I cannot sleep.

So I don't have time to take
a f*cking breath, okay?!

This is destroying us.

I need you to do something about it!

What if he has a mental illness,

like... like schizophrenia?

While there are some cases
of late-onset schizophrenia

and head trauma does increase the risk,

having hallucinations alone

doesn't meet the diagnostic criteria,

not to mention that
all of his other testing

is perfectly normal.

What the f*ck is
happening to my husband?

A friend of mine...

A dear friend of mine told me once

that the universe is...
is always speaking to us,

and it's just, few bother to listen.

Maybe he can help.

More f*cking wacky sh*t?

I'm afraid so.

Thanks, Dr. White.

20 bucks.

That is not a bad start.

Gotta say, I've had my doubts,

but you've got Haverford
in your blood after all.

So this is what my parents do, huh?
This is it?

Uh, they pull a more creative variation,
but same idea.

Cool.

Oh, for f*ck's sake.

All right.

It's time to get you home, kiddo.

First, show me more.

Yeah, sure.

Yeah.
Hey.

Looks like the d*ck of Death
found his next victim.

d*ck of Death!

All right.

The most important part of the con

is actually identifying the right mark,
right?

Someone ready to be taken.

And you play on their emotional
blind spot, whatever that is...

so guilt, loneliness, greed, love.

That's how you reel them in.

I think I found my mark.

These two dolls are married.

They have to come
to White Tony's with us.

So, did you guys do it yet?

Well, did you? Shut up.

I bet it happens tonight.
I said, shut up!

Hey, hey, hey.

Enough already.

Drina, you should stop making it
so hard for your sister.

Hard for her? What about me?

What about you?

You're married with the head
of two families.

This is really good.
This sucks.

My life is over because of some
stupid f*cking Gypsy tradition!

Tradition is all we have.

Really, Grandma?

Mm-hmm.

Where's Glendale Heights, anyway?

Take the 101 to the 134
and get off at Hell.

Man, it could be worse.

Could be Tarzana.

Sim sala bim, and voila.

You need to put
a better lock on your door.

Eduardo.

You're here for your weekly reading?

There another reason why I'd be here?

No. Uh, how's things?

You're the psychic. You tell me.

The Lovers reversed...
A union of opposites...

the need to heal...

disharmony.

Is there a relationship in
your life that needs resolving?

Wheel of Fortune reversed...
Something is set in motion.

There are difficulties
that may continue.

The Emperor.

Friends and colleagues
have betrayed you.

Justice, also reversed...

Something remains in
flux and unresolved.

What do you think that means, Charlie?

It's more what
my interpretation means to you.

Humor me.

It means...

the wedding job didn't
satisfy my debt to you.

Not even close.

Most of those cheap bastards
were wearing knock-offs, anyway.

And I had to give some bling back.

What? What do you mean?
The father of the bride...

Turns out he's a buddy of mine.

How good of a buddy?

Don't worry.

I didn't tell him about you.

That's two strikes, Charlie.

There won't be a third.

I'm optimistic about this, Charlie,

if you can talk him into it.

I'll talk to him.
Eduardo!

Linda, how you liking the ride?
I love it.

Hey, I gotta run.
Let me know what happens.

What's all this?

I'm cooking tonight.

You're cooking?
Mm-hmm.

Don't act so surprised.

Listen, I need your fun money.

Why?

I conned Simza into a buyout
of our services.

How'd you do that?

I played on her affections

for everyone's favorite house guest.

Fonso and Simza.

But I need to get back to her today,

seal the deal with a down payment.

I scrounged a few grand,
but I'm really gonna need your stash.

My money.

Our money.

Remember my leopard boots,
knee-high, Vegas?

How could I forget?

Back in my closet, right boot.

Thank you, honey.

You'll be back for dinner, right?

I will be back for dinner.

You better.

Nice picture. Yours?

Pulled it off her Instagram...

nothing that can be traced back to me.

Smart kid,
playing on their emotions like this.

I mean,
they'll be tripping over each other

just to show how much of
a good friend they were to Emma.

Which makes them blind to the con.

Yes.

Okay, so now that you've laid
the trap and set the bait...

Mm-hmm.
...don't forget,

you still have to... Yank in the mark.

More like reel in the mark.

Marks... plural.

Look at those assholes.

I'm gonna take 'em all down.

Okay, now is not the time

to let emotion get in the way of things.

How are we gonna get
this message out to the marks...

plural?

Oh. Yeah.

Um, this is a roster

of everybody's school e-mail addresses.

sh*t!

Once I press Send,

it goes out from a dummy address.

So, what are you waiting for?

Do it.

Do it, do it, do it,
do it, do it, do it.

Nice.

Don't worry, kiddo.
Everything's gonna be fine.

Here. Drink up, big stuff.

Good work.

Great.

Oh, we have...

I got it, too.
I know.

Oh.
There you go.

Not bad. Good start.

$15! $15!

What?

How...?

Line it up.

Here, let's go.

There's Daddy!

Remember, Lala,
your father has been banished.

He is unclean. He's not even family.

She knows, Grandma.

Lala! It's Daddy.

Hey, baby! It's locked.

Open up. Sharon, please.

Yes, ma'am.

Baby?

Drina?

Drina.

Lala, please. Come on, baby.

Who the f*ck are you?

I work for Mrs. Marks.
Yeah, right.

Hey, Ma. Open up.

Step away from the car, please.
It's my f*cking car.

Not anymore.
Drina.

Come on!

Baby! Please?

Lala.

Please?

I won't ask you again.
Step away from the car.

f*ck off.

Aah!

Please, don't.

Aah!
Stop it!

Sharon, that's enough.

You f... Okay, okay, okay.

Ah!

sh*t!

Something's burning.
I know, I know.

Is Fonso here?
No.

I have a proposition for him...

something that just might
get him out of our hair.

Well, it better wait until after dinner.

I've been at this all day, God damn it.

Is that my Moroccan chicken recipe?

Sorry about the mess.
It's fine.

I mean, a messy kitchen is, um,
like they say, filled with love.

Oh, that is bullshit.
It is. I just made it up.

But I appreciate it,
with everything that's been going on.

Thanks.

Something's burning.

Got it. Thank you.

What have you two been up to?

My resume.
Just a school project.

Well, Mom made a special dinner.

I'm... I-I gotta go finish something.

Yeah, we're almost finished.

Hey, what'd the doctor say?

I'm fine. Thank you.
Good.

She worked really hard on it.

We're almost done.

You know what we haven't done
in a long time?

Had dinner, just the two of us.

It's fine.

Well, we should probably eat it
before it gets cold.

You saw your doctor?

Yeah, yeah.

That old insomnia thing.

Did he give you something for it?

You!

Come with me.

Fonso...
Now!

Fonso.

What are we doing? Where are we going?

Payback. Now get yours.
Get my what?

Get your f*cking g*n.

I-I don't own a f*cking g*n!

Well, get one. You're backing me up.

Are you looking for revenge

on whoever b*at the sh*t out of you?

They f*cking banished me!

I know.

I know,
but this won't get your kids back.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

You want payback?

You want vengeance?

There's more than one kind, Fonso.

Welcome to your new home.
Thank you for your hospitality.

Won't you come in?
Thank you.

Hey, girl.

Tennis courts and pool out back.

We have a squash court inside.

What's squash?

If you ever wanna learn
to play the piano,

we have this tuned once a month.

This is a second living room.

All marble,
Italian floors throughout the house.

And this is White Tony's home office.

What a mess!

I still can't get myself to go inside.

Oh.

Oh, Drina. I almost forgot.

Let me show you the bedroom you
and Li'I Tony will be sharing.

This way!

Hmm?

Isn't it wonderful?

Oh, it's very impressive.

I like sleeping on the right side,

but, for you, I'll switch.

So generous.

Best of all,

your bedroom is conveniently
located right next to...

the future nursery.

Mm.

Ew! it looks like barf!
Lala!

You should show respect
for our new host.

But it looks so gross.
It's the traditional Vlach,

a mourning dish from Romania.

You shouldn't bring
your telephone to the table.

Oh, he's fine.

Of course.

How...
How did things go with the Council?

I'm letting the accountants
deal with everything.

They say that I have
a cash-flow problem.

Need to scale back on expenses.

But I thought that White Tony...

Yes. Well, apparently, my dear husband

had most of our money tied up

in various schemes
that are hard to get out of.

I see.

Which is why Drina has to take herself

out of Harvard-Westlake next semester.

What?!
It is a luxury we can't afford.

And now that you're married,

you don't need to be spending
that much money

on your education, trust me.

But I...
I agree.

Now that you're married,
your life is dedicated to the family.

And an expensive education
is of no practical use.

So we understand each other?
Yeah.

There has been much change of late.

It is understandable that we all
have to make some sacrifices.

We should also discuss

consummating the marriage vows tonight.

It's time, don't you think?

Rita? Tonight's the night.

Unfortunately, I don't think
that tonight is the best night

for the physical union

to take place between our two families.

Hmm. And why is that?
An old Machvaia superstition.

But it is unwise to bring
a new spirit to the family...

while the spirit of White Tony
still lingers.

Unless you wish to copulate

while your father is still here,
watching?

Um...

I mean...

This house is still marime.

In our family,

the mourning period
to purify a house is 40 days.

Hmm.

Well, in the Ranko family,

we mourn for a fortnight.

A fortnight it is.

Good.

Oh, f*ck!

Shh.
Shh.

I'm telling you, this is a good deal.
It's a win-win.

Shh.

Listen, you get your money

out from under the pool
and into some real assets.

You want me to go legit?

Well, I mean, if you wanna

call real-estate developers "legit,"
then, yeah.

This could be the start
of something big, Fonso...

a new chapter for you.

Yeah. What's in it for you?

You're off my couch.

Why do you have a crowbar?

I'm breaking in.
To your own house?

Don't you have keys?

No, I've never had keys.

Is it locked?
Of course it's locked.

Easy on the Crown Royal.

Ahh.

Okay. Do that room.

We gotta go. We gotta go!

Yeah, I know.

Fonso.

Fonso!

Wait.

Stay here.

What are you doing?

Fonso, what are you doing?