03x06 - Troubleshooting

[bunniefuu]

Previously, on "Casual"...

- Got an interview.
- Ooh.

Some new company
in digital branding.

And, as Chief Technology
Officer, I would, what?

- Head up the development team?
- The CTO is more of, um,

- an IT professional.
- Yeah.

You want me to be the guy who tells you
how to restart your computer?

Hey, there.

Got a minute to stick it
to the oligarchy?

You don't think maybe the people

backing this initiative have a less than
philanthropic agenda?

The Clean Renewables Institute?

It's a group of rich old men
who want to sell natural gas.

I'm always looking for interns.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Jack Briggs.

He can sustain a relationship
about as long

as he could probably hold
a boom box over his head.

I just don't wanna see you get hurt.

- Do you find me attractive?
- I do.

Do you think you can
have sex with someone

you find attractive,
no strings attached?

[squeaking]

♪ ♪

[car door slams]

♪ ♪

[car door slams]

[car beeps]

- Hey, could you pass the milk?
- Yeah.

All right.

Did you know
you have three cartons of eggs,

and the oldest carton is,
like, four months old,

and there's only one egg in it?

Eggs don't spoil.

So do I ask why you're in costume,
or do you just tell me?

Yeah, it's my alter ego,
Tybalt, a medieval

Scandinavian sorcerer.

- Right.
- [exclaims]

- Of course.
- [chuckles]

Oh, wait, sh*t, it's your first day.

- Yep.
- Are you nervous?

- I'd be nervous.
- Nervous? No.

I'm so f*cking nervous.

I haven't been a wage sl*ve
since my s.

Do you think they'll haze me?

No, I'm sure they'll just stick to

pre-formed social groups
and subtly isolate you.

Thank you, that's helpful.

- Yeah.
- What do we have here?

Ah, "Magic: The Gathering."

Bunch of friends are coming over
to play cards.

And you wear costumes for this game?

No, I just love costumes. Bah!

- [door bell chimes]
- Oh, will you grab that?

♪ ♪

Tybalt here?

RAE: Aha!

BOTH: [laugh]

[exclaiming]

[phone buzzes]

Good morning.

Leon, you're not gonna believe this,
but I need your help.

What seems to be the problem?

ALEX: You sounds weird.
Why do you sound weird?

Are you happy?

Of course not.

Oh, okay, do you think
you could watch my house

- for the day?
- Why?

ALEX: Rae is hosting a costume party.

There are multiple strangers
with foam weaponry

tramping around my living room.

ALL: [chanting] Fireball, fireball,

fireball, fireball!

ALEX: They're chanting.

GAME PLAYERS: [exclaiming]

Mm.

Here, that still needs to be canvassed.

So I'm going to have you do this.

And Jim made copies of all the names,
and then we'll just...

Laura?

Casey warned us.

Said she poached you from the bowels
of corporate corruption?

Yeah, cut the golden parachute
right off my back.

Well, come on. I'll show you around.

No, that can't work. Hey.

- Hi.
- Welcome.

She's been working
the phones since : .

It's unclear whether she eats
or sleeps or just absorbs energy

from the lies of elected officials.

I'm Todd, by the way.
Everyone calls me Harvard.

- You call yourself Harvard.
- All right, Katrina.

All right, Laura, field team.
Field team, Laura.

- Hey.
- Hi.

So how much did Casey tell you?

Not much, but I'm a quick study.

Cool, we're canvassing on West Adams.

There's a big community meeting tonight.

Signatures?

- What?
- Nothing. Let's do it.

I've given up beer and liquor
and caffeine for this baby.

I'm not giving up Equinox.

You really want to die on this sword?

This is where you're gonna take a stand?

- Alyssa, I think we...
- What stand?

- [thud]
- Exercise is a basic human right.

[muffled angry voices]

He's not taking any of this seriously.

It's like I'm just this overactive,

hormonal baby capsule
that hasn't had sex in days.

Maybe if I got to work out,
I'd feel better about myself.

- Oh.
- And then, by extension,

be more likely to have sex with you.

Fine, go to f*cking Equinox.

[thud]

What was that howling?

Are you f*cking a barista named Theo?

His name is Theo?

Mm-hmm, and his girlfriend
is not happy about it.

Girlfriend?

Ah, sh*t.

She seemed like a real nut case.

I thought I was gonna have to
take my rings off

and thrown down, but she took off
before sh*t got real.

Uh, have you ever actually
been in a real fistfight?

Multiple, I am % white trash
on my father's side.

- [door opens]
- Jesus, Leia.

Hey, is everything okay?
I heard some screaming in here.

Oh, yeah, Val just has a lady stalker.

Yeah, apparently
I'm f*cking her boyfriend.

Whoa, clearly we have
some catching up to do.

Do you want to get a drink later?

Hell yeah, I do.

- Great.
- I'm done at : , okay?

- Okay.
- I love those boots.

Thank you.

She loves the boots.

You're doing a noble thing.

Your pen is mighty, sir.

We'll see you at : .

- Yeah, %.
- %?

%.... %?

That guy would've
signed up for ballet class

if it got us off his stoop.

- [laughs]
- There's no way he shows.

Erin Brockovich over here.

You can't force people to care.

About the environment?

No, most things.
Definitely not the environment.

I'm k*lling your philanthropy buzz,

- aren't I?
- Oh, come on,

we're on a signature b*at.
My buzz is real weak.

Well, look at it like this...
it's something

- for your college apps.
- If I even want to go to college.

Ooh, rebel, rebel.

Yep, I've even got a bad tattoo.

I love a bad tattoo.

All right is next.

How many more of these do we have?

.

Sigh, heavy sigh.

Saya, call Nat about L'Oreal.

She's contracted with them before.

She can get you the numbers.

Oh, and Beckett,
I need to see the Chance deal

before it's signed off.

Oh, oh, my God, perfect.

Everyone, meet Alex Cole, new CTO.

- Hello.
- Let's give him a warm welcome.

[applause]

Thank you, thank you,
glad to be a part of the team.

Well, you have big shoes
to fill, but I have faith.

Our last IT guy, Erik,
was like family to us.

It's been hard.

Oh, no, I'm so sorry. Did he die?

[laughter]

He went to Google.

- Ah.
- He's doing really great.

He's leading a team of , and he's
really, really happy and fulfilled.

Aww.

- Cool.
- And he sent cookies.

- Oh, he is so sweet.
- Erik.

There's a gluten-free,
dairy-free one for you.

Erik wasn't sure if you had
any dietary restrictions.

Wow, how considerate.

Anyway, um, if you don't mind
hitting the ground running,

Saya, you're having issues
with your computer, yeah?

It's got that spin-y wheel of death,
and I can't get online.

Right, this is probably
a minimum speed issue,

and I will go take a look.

Okay, let's try something else.

Oh, wow, that's pretty.

Is that Hawaii?

Yeah, Oahu.

"The Gathering Place," that's
what Oahu means in Hawaiian.

I know. Both my parents were born there.

So what do you think's wrong?

Um, still in the diagnostic phase.

Erik maintained a minimum upload speed

of megs per second on our servers,

so I know it's not that.

Oh, wait, I have an idea.

Wait, don't... Ugh, yeah,
that takes minutes to reload.

A bad idea. Hmm.

- [phone ringing]
- I need to get that.

Can you do this from your desk?

Oh, yeah, um, yeah,
I need to get a part anyway...

A part?

[phone ringing]

Getting a real Buffalo Bill vibe here.

[groans] f*ck, is it hot.

Here.

[laughs] Thank you.

- I want coffee.
- Me too. What's nearby?

My place.

Bad teacher.

What about the other houses?

I do like coffee.

♪ ♪

[bell dings]

[exhales] How was that for timing?

[indistinct chatter]

- Honestly, it's inspiring.
- Totally.

To just pick up and start fresh
like that?

We'll probably work for him someday.

- As soon as he asks, I'm there.
- To Erik.

The f*cking best of us.

[sighs]

- [phone vibrating]
- Sorry, sorry, hold on.

- Hello?
- ALEX: Leon, what's happening?

Are those wizards behaving?

I'm, uh, keeping them in line.

You're a lifesaver, you know that?

You're a true friend.

- Any time.
- RAIN: Leon!

Cunning Breezedancer up in yo' sh*t!

Equipped and breathing fire.

[all whooping]

What is that?

Gotta run.

- JUDY: Hi.
- Hey.

I'm Judy. Sorry we didn't get
to meet this morning.

Alex.

Can you join me in my office
for a minute?

[sighs]

We are a relatively new company.

And we're still figuring things out.

For instance, I'm the COO,
but for some reason,

now I have to deal with HR complaints.

- I'm sorry?
- It's fine.

It's your first day... a little
culture shock it normal.

Digital branding, not !sis.

Hm. Did you "huff away angrily"

when a coworker questioned
your competence?

No. I stepped away
to do some troubleshooting.

Is this about that Oahu thing?

'Cause I was just trying to be nice.

Also, is it offensive to not know

where someone's parents are from?

Is that, like, a micro-aggression?

'Cause I certainly didn't
mean it that way.

She didn't mention the Oahu thing.

Please just try to be patient
and positive, okay?

I hear your note.

And I note it.

Thank you.

And hey, don't drive yourself crazy.

No one expects you to replace
Erik on day one.

Okay? Thank you.

Oh, God, no,
I really should have called you.

If I had known what I was
missing... I mean, look at you.

You feel so... loose and just good.

Well, these are the perks
of an identity crisis.

- Mm.
- Mm-hmm.

I want an identity crisis.

Have you tried k*lling your father

and then finding out that your
father's not your real father?

No, no, but I did almost cut my bangs.

- What?
- I know!

Okay, you're gonna wanna sleep on that.

Um, are we do for another bottle?

I-I would.

Just I'm sort of training
for a marathon.

- You're sort of training?
- God. That was so obnoxious.

I'm definitely training for a marathon.

Penance for my privilege.

Uh, okay, that's fine. I'll just...

Keep my dignity and continue
drinking in my bathtub.

- Good for you.
- Oh, my God.

You're so old.

From afar, I was like, okay, she's cute.

But up close?
You don't have crow's feet.

You have crow's face.

- Who is this?
- I, um...

I think this is the girlfriend.

Yeah, I'm the girlfriend, bitch.

- Whoa, okay.
- No one's talking to you.

What happened to girl code?

Girl code? Okay.

He didn't tell me
he had a girlfriend, so.

- I think that's on him, right?
- That's totally on him.

Yeah, I guess it explains
why we f*cked in the car.

- f*cking look at me!
- Stop yelling.

Okay, go yell at your boyfriend, not me.

I don't know you.
We don't know each other.

Also, girl code? Really?

Did you see who we elected as president?

The code is cracked.

Enigma has fallen.

You have no clue what I'm
talking about, do you?

[Jennifer laughs]

[laughter]

Wow. Um...

Hi, yes, no, we'll definitely
need another bottle, please.

- Look at you.
- [laughing]

Not much of a turnout.

We did what we could.

But hey, you should come by later.

I'll make espresso.

Well, this is an unmitigated
f*cking disaster.

- It was rough out there.
- I mean, six people?

I thought we were making inroads.

It's summer.
A lot of people are out of town.

God, José Malick and Peg Danow
didn't even sign?

Did they say why?

I don't think so.
I can't remember. Can you?

No, no. It's just too many
people to keep straight.

Todd, let's talk.

- Boo! Mm-mm.
- What?

- Thumbs down!
- No, no, no, no!

- Thumbs way up!
- No.

Men should not wax down there.
Are you kidding?

- Uh, no.
- There's just too many flaps.

Oh, I'm sorry. Are you f*cking Aquaman?

- Flaps?
- Not flaps. Folds.

I feel like I'm looking
at a naked old fisherman

- with a little beanie.
- Oh, my God!

Oh, the image! Oh, I can't unsee it.

Oh, my God. Did I tell you
I f*cking miss you?

- Aww.
- I'm saying f*cking so much.

I think I am officially drunk.
I do, I f*cking miss you.

- I f*cking miss you too.
- You know what we need to do?

- What?
- Is another dinner party.

- A game night, something.
- Mm-hmm.

- Yes?
- Anything.

Okay, great, we will...
I'll replace Jack.

Oh, come on.
Are you kidding? I'd be fine.

I'm not worried about you.

- You're not worried about me?
- Oh.

I find that kinda hard to believe.

Okay...

- What.
- Mm.

- What?
- Sorry, I'm trying to decide

how discerning I should be about this,

but apparently just not at all.

Jack is a sex addict.

And he is in recovery,
or on the wagon, or whatever.

- But that's the fact.
- Whoa.

That's why I tried to warn you
off of him in the first place.

No, I get it. I... Get it, yeah.

- Thank you.
- f*ck it.

- I mean, you're an adult.
- Mm-hmm.

- He's an adult.
- I am an adult.

You're an adult, and
you're really good at gaming.

- I am. So game night.
- Game night.

- We shall play.
- Yes!

I want to play this game night.

I want to order French fries.

[quirky music]

Hey, are you okay?

I just got fired.

For missing a few houses?

For f*cking you.

Do you think I need protection?

- Sorry.
- We're adults.

If you're gonna fire him,
then fire me too.

Todd was your direct supervisor.

He removed you from your post
and took advantage of you.

Oh, my God, I feel like I'm in
a bad Lifetime r*pe movie.

He did not take advantage of me.

I wanted something,
and he gave it to me.

An older guy, an adult,
in a position of power.

I mean, that's predatory.

- If you can't see that...
- Whatever.

Yeah, I guess I'll just find
somewhere else to do free work.

[laughter]

Hey, sorry. Kinda turned into a bender.

It's fine.

Gonna go eat this pizza
and think about obsolescence.

- That bad, huh?
- You know, I can't even

fix a VPN.

It's f*cking embarrassing.

- Who's your provider?
- Nord.

- Open or PPTP?
- PPTP.

Oh, there's your problem.

PPTP sucks.

Download Viscosity and go Open.

Rain's an IT wizard.
Like, literally. Doomslayer too.

- Where do you work?
- Enframe.

Oh, snap. You replaced
Erik Tripplethorpe?

f*cking Google, man.

You gotta download his book, man.

- "Insight" is amazing.
- Of course he's got a book.

- Series of e-readers...
- Shhh.

[mumbles]

♪ ♪

[keyboard clacking]

♪ ♪

[phone chimes]

♪ ♪

_

[indistinct chatter]

- You think this will do it?
- I think it will, yes.

I've got, like, contracts
that need entering.

- Big contracts.
- I know that, I understand.

And I'm doing everything I can
to get you there.

It's just, it's taking
an awfully long time.

Okay, Saya, that's, unfortunately,

not something I can control.

SAYA: The bar has literally
stopped moving.

- It's frozen.
- God damn it.

God f*cking damn it.

How did you even get this job?

Are you someone's Ret*rded cousin?

Oh, I just said the R-word.
Maybe I should just call Erik.

Fine! Call him. Call him. Call Erik.

See if I f*cking care.

I'm just the IT guy, right?
It's not like I have feelings.

Or pride or anything
resembling human emotion.

God!

[computer pings]

It's working now.

See? I fixed it.

I like the...
I like the stubble beard thing.

- Oh, yeah, thanks.
- Cool.

You know, I wanted to reach
out to you too, actually.

- To apologize.
- Oh, don't worry about it.

No, no, the birthday party
was... that was...

- Oh.
- And your dad.

- I-I should apologize.
- No, really, it's...

I...

- I should be apologizing to you.
- For what?

Well, I didn't know
what you were going through.

And I guess I just thought...

I don't know what I thought.

About what?

Well, your... sex addition.

Well, that...

is not what I expected.

And I don't really like being
defined by that label, but okay.

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry. I just...
Are you not an addict?

There are times in my life
when sex plays

a bigger role than it probably
should, and when that happens,

I scale back or abstain. That's...

That's all.

Are you abstaining now?

- I am.
- Mm.

For how long?

Since you.

- Should we order?
- Uh-huh.

♪ ♪

- Hey.
- Hey.

How 'bout that espresso?

[elevator dings]

Hey.

So you had lunch with Jack.

Yeah.

And you told him what I told you?

I guess I did.

He's my friend, Val.
He's pissed. What the f*ck?

I just got... I'm so sorry. I just...

I-I didn't think it was
that big a deal, and then...

It just slipped out.

How does something like that
just slip out?

It just did. Just...

I, um... we were having lunch.

It was really awkward. Um...

You know what? It's fine.

It was my fault.

[gasping]

Hey, can we just shift and...

No.

Don't move. Don't move.

- HARVARD: What the f*ck?
- I don't like it like that.

Well, you didn't seem to mind before.

Well, now I do.

ALEX: IT guy, right?
It's not like I have feelings.

Or pride, or anything
resembling a human emotion!

God! God! [growls]

That's excessive. And well edited.

- You are not good at this job.
- I'm really not.

What are you doing here?

I have friends who use Snooger.
It's a great app.

Nobody leaves that to work IT.

Look, I'm years old.
I'm out of money.

I'm keeping a horrible secret
from my sister.

I'm living alone.
Actually, that's not true.

I have a cosplaying roommate
who's been here for

two weeks and already has
more friends than me.

You know, it's funny.
When things are going well,

you never think about it.
It's just normal.

But when things are bad,
it's, like, every minute

you spend thinking about
how things used to be,

and how you wish you'd
appreciated it more.

I'm sorry. That was sentimental
and embarrassing.

It's okay. I totally get it.

Nobody's perfect.

Except, apparently, for Erik.

Oh, I couldn't stand Erik.

He signed his emails,
"Have a blessed day."

No. Gross.

And I can't prove it,

though, I firmly believe
he was hosting gigabytes...

gigabytes of anime p*rn torrents
on our server.

You're blowing my mind right now.

Look, I can't go through the process

of hiring another IT guy.

Interviewing those freaks
was insufferable.

So. Please.

Take a class or something
and learn how to do this job.

And no more temper tantrums at work.

I have a nine-year-old at home.

I get enough of that sh*t already.

Understood.

Oh. Have a blessed day.

Get out.

[microwave beeps]

[phone chimes]

[chuckles]

["Moonstruck" by Sinkane]

MAN: ♪ Each night, outside of Lowlands ♪

♪ Walking home alone ♪

- ♪ I know which side that I'm on ♪

♪ Confused, we look up,
doubting what's our song ♪

- ♪ Yet alone, without a song of our own ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Assumed you'd come and show me
but I learned soon ♪

♪ you don't even come outside
on your own ♪

♪ No, you don't, you don't even
come outside ♪

RAE: Hey, finally.

Oh, no.

Oh, yes.

MAN: ♪ No, we don't,
we don't even got a song ♪

- RAE: Oh, damn.
- LEON: Come on.

- ALEX: Can I play this?
- RAE: You can keep that.

- And then turn those over.
- I don't wanna hear it, Leon.

- Turn those over.
- I see your fox.

- And I raise you a lord...
- No, you're not.

You don't know what you're doing yet.

- So just wait.
- All right.

[all chattering and laughing]

MAN: ♪ Je t'aime ♪

♪ Ma lune ♪

♪ Je t'aime ♪

♪ Your face ♪

♪ And pull ♪

♪ Je t'aime ♪

♪ Ma lune ♪

♪ Je t'aime ♪

♪ Ma lune ♪

♪ Je t'aime ♪

♪ ♪