05x07 - Who Will You Be?

[bunniefuu]

Previously on The Resident...

I can't have you in my life
right now. I told you that.

I am not trying to reconnect
with my birth mother.

- (COUGHS)
- Mother has stage lung cancer.

There's only one hope left.

Oh, it's targeted therapy.

It could buy my mother years.

You don't eat, you barely sleep.

All you talk about is medicine.

- I'm literally saving lives.
- And what about your life?

You and Nic are missed every day.

I miss it, man.

It wasn't my plan to leave, but...

Gigi's my everything.

♪ We're gonna have a good day ♪

♪ And all my homies gonna ride today ♪

♪ And all these mommies... ♪

New interns,

welcome to Chastain.

I'm Dr. Pravesh.

Follow me, and you might
survive your first day.

If you're smart,

you will see the nurses
as your best teachers.

They are your lifelines.

Use them if you want to succeed.

Look... I know you're scared.

I remember, on my first day,
I was shaking in my boots.

(INTERN LAUGHS)

You have something
you want to add back there?

No disrespect, Doc.

It's just that some of us
don't scare so easily.

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

Hmm.

Challenge accepted.

♪ ♪

They want Daddy to come back
and work here, so Auntie Kit

is gonna pull out all the stops.

So, when she asks us what we think,

you are gonna say... what?

I love it, but not as much as my house.

Ah.

Hey, yes, you nailed it.

Nailed it.

That's not Auntie Kit.

No, it isn't.

Auntie Kit got called away

on emergency business,
so she asked me to show you

our nursery and convince your daddy

to come back and work here.

Therefore...

it looks like
you are stuck with Dr. Bell.

CONRAD: This is a renowned surgeon,

TV personality, and now
a preschool tour guide.

Oh, you never cease
to amaze me, Dr. Bell.

Not how either of us expected to
spend our morning. Come on in.

So, the hope is to expand
the grade levels

as the kids grow up.

Sounds like Kit has
thought of everything.

- Gigi.
- Yes?

What do you think?

I love it!

But do you love it more than our house?

- Way more than our house.
- (LAUGHS)

- GIGI: Can I go color?
- (BELL LAUGHS)

What? Oh, my God.

Yeah, get out of here.
Go do your coloring.

BELL: I have hope
because you came today.

If you weren't gonna
consider it, why even show up?

Ah, same reason you did.

You don't say no to Kit Voss.

Look,

- I'd love to come back...
- That's what we want.

... but my priorities have changed.

It's not just childcare.
I need flexibility, weekends.

There's a laundry list
of things I would need.

If there's a hospital out there
that wants to do that for you,

it's this one.

Okay, well, a private
practice in Buckhead

offered me three years and childcare

and I make my own hours.

You're impossibly talented,

and doling out B sh*ts

for hangovers, I mean...

And that impact is minuscule

compared to what you can do here.

I appreciate the sentiment, but...

Okay. (STAMMERS)
Well, so what about this?

What about we're stretched so thin,

just pitch in for the day
and just see how it feels?

Really? Your plan is to hold me hostage

- until I agree to come back?
- (LAUGHS)

Well, that depends. Is it working?

- (CHUCKLES)
- AUSTIN: Hawkins.

Hey, I heard you were around.

Listen, brother, I need
your help with a patient.

And you got AJ involved.
That's impressive.

It's about my mother.

She's back in the hospital.

(AUSTIN SIGHS)

Careful. It's hot.

Hey. Uh, sorry.

Hi, Dr. Sutton.

Dr. Daniels.

Daily grind. Am I right?

- Here you go.
- Uh, thank you.

Obviously, you... you knew
I was coming, right?

AJ told me.

I hope it's okay that I'm here.

I'm, uh... (CHUCKLES)

I'm not the same person I was years ago.

Good.

And congratulations
on getting through med school.

That's no small feat.

Uh, I mean, it wasn't
that hard. (SCOFFS)

For me, anyway.

Well, maybe you haven't changed
that much after all.

I see you're still suffering

from that dangerously
high opinion of yourself.

(HUFFS) It's incurable, so...

(LAUGHS)

Can I ask you a personal question?

No.

Obviously, you don't seem
to despise me anymore, so...

- I never despised you.
- No, you-you definitely did.

Look, Trevor, it is inappropriate

for you to tell me
what I feel or don't feel

about you or anything else.

(CHUCKLES) I knew it.

Huh. You've been in therapy.
You're setting your boundary.

- Kudos.
- Okay.

God.

Look, we're gonna need
to set some rules.

No one here needs to know
that we're related,

that you're my biological son.

Agreed. It's none of their business.

- Mm-hmm.
- And?

Try really hard not to be an ass.

- Good advice. Anything else?
- Just one more.

Don't ever ask me for money.

And we're positive
this isn't a resurgence

of Carol's lung cancer, right?

Well, according to her oncologist,

all tests show zero cancer progression.

That means her targeted
immunotherapy's working.

She cycled through several dr*gs
these last few years.

You know, I honestly thought

we'd reached the end of the road
till we found this one.

Now, I know it's not a cure,
but, uh, you'd have me fooled.

That's good.

If it's not the cancer, it's
likely something we can fix.

- Hey, Carol.
- Oh.

(LAUGHS) AJ, you didn't tell me

we were having a VIP guest visit.

Ah, careful, Ma.

You know, flattery goes
to his head, like brain freeze.

(LAUGHS)

It's good to see you again.
How you feeling?

Uh, I've been better. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

Sad to hear you had left Chastain.

I hope this means
you'll be back for good.

Yeah, well, plenty of time
to talk about me.

I want to hear about you.
Tell me, what's going on?

Well...

I've never been so tired.

Can't make it through The Crown
without nodding off.

This woman loves Princess Diana.

(CAROL LAUGHS)

Then I started losing weight,

and that had me worried.

- Maybe an infection?
- AUSTIN: That's what I thought,

but she's not responding
to any antibiotics.

Could be bacterial resistance

or an... atypical infection.

You know what? Let me get
some labs, run some tests.

Don't you worry.
We'll get you some answers.

(CHUCKLES)

CAROL: Mm.

Janice Bonner. Surgery.

Trevor. Anesthesia.

I'm Gemma. I'm I.M.

Not, I'm "I am". (LAUGHS)

I mean, I, Gemma, am I.M.

Internal medicine. We got it.

ZACH: I'm Zach.

- Primary care.
- JANICE: Yikes.

Hope you qualify
for student loan forgiveness.

What's up?

DEVON: Let's get started, shall we?

Dan, good morning.

These are the interns I told you about.

- Are they children, or am I old?
- (CHUCKLES)

-year-old male with pancreatitis.

What is the first thing that we do?

Oh, I hope it's all right,
I threw together

a little PowerPoint
for a possible plan of action.

I love the initiative, Dr. Bonner,

- but before that, what's first?
- Get smashed.

It's a mnemonic. Gallstones,

ethanol, trauma, steroids,
mumps, autoimmune,

scorpion sting, hypercalcemia, ERCP

and dr*gs.

No, the first thing we do is listen.

To the patient, and then to me.

HUNDLEY: Incoming. Multi-casualty event.

Someone crashed a boat into a dock.

DEVON: Okay.

Time to suit up.

We'll be back.

♪ ♪

DEVON: That's Trevor Daniels.

You know him?

He made quite the impression
when he tried to lecture

the doctors on how to treat
his junkie girlfriend.

Now I guess he's a doctor himself.

Well, he's an M.D., not a doctor, yet.

Not with that arrogance.

-year-old female with
blunt head trauma. GCS .

Dr. Bonner, you're with Hundley.

- Yes.
- And, um...

Brooks, you're with Dr. Feldman.

Are you sure, Coach? I know the
upper extremity neurovascular

- anatomy by heart, so...
- They've got it handled,

but there's a woman in bay five

who needs her blood work drawn.
Go help her.

Seriously? That guy's hand's
hanging on by a thread,

and you trust Thing One and Thing Two?

Your patient isn't any less important

because she doesn't have
a cleat in her hand.

She needs you. Go help her.

- (PHONE CHIMES)
- Hey, Dad just messaged.

They're a couple minutes out.

Padma, I love you,

but maybe put the sage down
and pick up a vacuum.

It's important that
we cleanse the space of

all of the negative energy.

Mom and Dad are the negative energy.

(SIGHS)

Why do they do this?
Just pop by randomly.

At least they don't stick around, okay?

It's just lunch.

Yeah, it starts as lunch, and
then it becomes an intervention.

Hence hiding your boyfriend's shoes.

You do realize that, someday,

they're gonna figure out
you live together, right?

Mm-hmm. Today is not that day.

- (DOORBELL RINGS)
- Oh.

- Hi!
- Oh!

- Hello, my...
- Ooh.

Oh, my darling girls. Mwah.

Come on in.

- Oh, my.
- (CHUCKLES): Hi.

So, how was the trip?

Not long enough.

I had to practically drag your father

out of that Venetian Pool.

Piña coladas and the greatest
hits of Olivia Newton-John.

- I've never been more relaxed.
- (CHUCKLES)

Beautiful place you've got here, Leela.

I hope that Devon is joining us.

- Uh, no.
- Oh.

- LEELA: Devon's at the hospital.
- Is something burning?

Oh, yeah, it's, um, sage.

It really purifies the air.

- No, there's something else.
- (GASPS) Oh, my gosh!

No, no, no, no, no, no.

- Oh, sh**t.
- (BUTTON BEEPS)

Everything all right?

Why don't we go out for lunch?

Hmm?

I know you're here for Carol.

Yeah, well, my buddy says
it's an emergency.

Would I have called you if it wasn't?

I don't know.

Protocol suggests
we send the patient home

with some painkillers.

- Something else going on?
- Call it instinct.

You and your instincts are lucky
I'm waiting on Carol's tests.

You got five minutes.

Intern. b*llet. Go.

Um, Kevin is a -year-old male
with a history of hypertension.

Uh, he came in with
sudden onset right flank pain...

Left. Left flank.

Uh, right. Uh, sorry. I mean, left.

That's, um, what he is, uh... (STAMMERS)

What are his vitals telling you?

Uh, slightly tachycardic.

Uh, you know, with the flank pain,

that could be kidney stones.

is a strange time to have
your first kidney stone, hmm?

- What about his blood pressure?
- ZACH: Oh, it's been stable.

- Has it?
- Yeah.

Hmm. Since we started talking,
his BP dipped down

to / before it popped back up.

Devil's in the details.

Kevin is headed into shock due
to a ruptured aortic aneurysm

that's leaking into his retroperitoneum.

Wait, but that-that's emergent.

We-we can't send him home.
He needs surgery.

Don't you miss this?

Daniels.

Page Vascular, tell them we're coming.

He's amazing.

♪ ♪

Her cortisol is severely low.

So, she has adrenal insufficiency.

CONRAD: Likely due to her past
courses of high-dose steroids.

Which would explain
the severity of the infection

and the low blood pressure
despite fluids.

We can give her IV hydrocortisone.

She should turn around quickly.

I'll order some follow-up labs
just to make sure

there are no other systemic issues.

(LAUGHS): I owe you one, Hawkins.

I didn't do anything.

You just needed a fresh set of eyes.

(SIGHS)

You lost your dad. It makes
sense you want to be thorough.

Yeah. If I'm gonna lose
the last parent I have,

I don't want to be blindsided again.

No, that's not where we are, not yet.

Look at you.

I knew you didn't lose your touch.

Who said I lost my touch?

Well, people talk.

(LAUGHS): But don't worry,
I got your back.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Ow! Didn't you hear me?

- I'm sensitive.
- Okay.

I heard you,

and I'd be done already
if you'd stop squirming.

I'd stop squirming
if you knew how to do your job.

(PANTS) Do you have
a supervisor I can talk to?

(GROANS)

Somebody needs to call
the health department.

Ants on the ceiling.
Spiders crawling up the walls.

Spider angioma,

when small blood vessels appear
resembling a spider's web.

It's subtle, but not uncommon
for someone with liver disease.

How long has it been
since you've had a drink?

Excuse me, I'm a mother.
I have four kids.

Hannah, I've spent a lot of time
around addicts,

and you check all the boxes, okay?

Sweaty, agitated,

- uh, weird hallucinations...
- (SHOUTS)

- How dare you?!
- Hey. All right, I'm just trying to help, okay?

- (GRUNTS)
- (SHOUTS)

- Who do you think you are?!
- The hell?!

HANNAH: Get off of me!

You don't know anything about me!

- Nothing!
- Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

- Okay. - (YELPS) Get off me!
- What happened here?

- Hannah's in withdrawal. She's an alcoholic.
- Hey.

We don't talk about patients
like they're not in the room.

No, no, no. I'm just trying to
tell you what's wrong with her,

why she tried to claw
my eyes out. Do you understand?

There's two feet of paperwork over there

that needs to get done.
See if you can manage that.

(HANNAH CRYING)

Wow. (CHUCKLES)

♪ Just stay a little while... ♪

Is there someplace else to eat?

We can't even hear each other.

I'll ask to turn the music down.

RAJ: Whew.

$ for a burger.

No vegetarian options.

They're on the back of the menu.

Don't worry about me.

I'm sure they have... bread.

Oh, no, Mom, look
at the back of the menu.

There's some vegetarian options there.

Thank you, darling Paddie.

You take such good care of your mother.

Hang on, I literally just told you that.

- Please, Leela, don't be so sensitive.
- I'm being sensitive?

Leela, restroom?

Come on.

♪ And show me... ♪

(SIGHS) God, it's just they're so...

Intolerable.

It's always something.

But you can't let them
get to you like this.

That's easy for you to say.

- You're the favorite.
- I'm not the favorite.

Come on.

You're "darling Paddie", and I'm...

I'm she who must not be named.

(SCOFFS)

And every time they're here,
just, I feel like I'm again

and I can't do anything right.

Then let me do the talking.

They'll leave,

and we don't have to see them
again until the holidays.

How's that?

Okay?

Come on.

(CHUCKLES): Okay.

How you feeling?

- Like my old self again.
- (CHUCKLES)

Now, let me see that beautiful baby.

(GROANS) Not a baby anymore.

At least if you ask her.

Oh, my heart.

She is the spitting image of Nic.

And there's a hint of mischief
in her eye,

just like her father. (LAUGHS)

Gigi knows what she wants
and she knows how to get it.

And what about you?
Are you taking care of yourself?

Well, remembered to shower this morning.

You know what I mean.

If there's anything
I've learned from raising AJ,

it's that you have to
prioritize yourself.

Kids are only as happy
as the parents that raise them.

I have Gigi, I have my friends,
like your son.

- What more could I ask for?
- You tell me.

Are you happy, Conrad?

Hey-hey. Mom, let's take a stroll.

Someplace I want to take you.

That sounds wonderful.

(CAROL SIGHS)

Thank you, and you take care.

- Don't be a stranger.
- You heard the lady.

Yeah. I'll see you around.

♪ ♪

Hey.

Um...

I've come to apologize for earlier.

You called me a drunk. I'm not.

And I believe you.

Dr. Pravesh was right.

I was completely out of line,
and I'm so, so sorry.

Um...

All right.

That...

Just a little bit
more comfortable, right?

And don't worry,
I'm gonna make sure you leave

feeling a whole lot better
than when you came in.

Just you wait.

♪ ♪

- (CROWD CHATTERING)
- (GENTLE PIANO MUSIC PLAYING)

Here you go. All right.

- Hey.
- WOMAN: Hi.

I love how you say, "The heart
is the key to the body

but the door to the soul".

- It's-it's pure poetry.
- AUSTIN: Oh, well, you're too kind.

I love that one, too.

You know, maybe the next book
will be a poetry book.

I can't wait. (CHUCKLES)

Make you jealous?

Why would it?

Used to be you.

You know, we should write a book.

Your brains.

My face, for obvious reasons.

I mean, the public will be clamoring

for something like that.

Goodbye, Nolan.

Think it over.

- What on earth?
- (HANNAH SIGHS)

I'm feeling much better now.

(KIDS CHATTERING)

I like it here, Daddy.

Can we come back tomorrow, please?

MADISON: Dr. Hawkins.

Carol Austin's follow-up labs are back.

Thank you.

♪ ♪

Okay, what's your name?

- Uh, to Sherry.
- Sherry. Okay.

Mom, take it easy.

CAROL: Oh, hush. (BREATHING HEAVILY)

I need a photo... of my son.

- Mom!
- (CROWD GASPING, MURMURING)

Her pulse is racing.
We need a defibrillator.

This is my fault. I shouldn't
have moved her so soon.

This wasn't you.
Something else is going on.

Let's get the pads on her.

We were right about her cortisol,

but it was masking something bigger.

Which is what?

- That's what we're gonna figure out together.
- BELL: Prepare to shock.

- CONRAD: Clear.
- (DEFIBRILLATOR THUMPS)

♪ ♪

Pulse is strong and regular.

What the hell is going on?

Your mother, she's...

she's in multi-organ failure.

- Doesn't make sense.
- (SIGHS)

Her cardiac MRI is
consistent with myocarditis.

Which explains the arrhythmia.

But not where
the heart issues came from.

So, whatever it is

has sent her liver and
kidney values through the roof.

Same with her thyroid hormone.

Infection's being treated,
no toxins, no traumas, no...

... no preexisting organ dysfunction.

Oh, man.

Her body's attacking itself.

♪ ♪

All right, fellas.

Just let me have it.

It's her immunotherapy.

It's keeping her alive,
but it's also the reason...

... her organs are shutting down.

Champagne tap, baby.

Nothing but spinal fluid.

Nice going, Daniels.

GEMMA: I had so much blood in my tap,

I thought my patient was gonna faint.

- I thought I was about to faint.
- DEVON: Hannah.

Stop, stop.

Listen, please. We can help you.

Uh, you've done more
than enough, really.

I have to go.

♪ ♪

DEVON: Daniels.

You gave a beer to a patient
in alcohol withdrawal.

- You did what?
- I can explain, okay?

I know it wasn't exactly protocol...

You didn't just break protocol.

You broke every rule of medicine.

We could've helped Hannah,
gotten her treatment,

- saved her life.
- Yeah, I wouldn't have done it

if you had just listened to me.

I proved to you she was an alcoholic.

Wait, so you contributed

to a patient's addiction
to prove a point?

Are your patients just pawns
to prove how smart you are?

What? No.

What? Of course not.

I was just trying to... (STAMMERS)

I hope you took a picture
of that champagne tap

'cause it's gonna be your last.

Wait, wait, wait. Hold up.
What-what does that mean?

It's not obvious?

I'm cutting you.

No, no, no, no, no.

You can't do that.
Please, I'm-I'm begging you.

I'll be better. I didn't even realize...

See? Right there.

Even your apology is about you.

- You have no remorse, no humility.
- If I get kicked out...

If I get kicked out,
I won't be a doctor.

Maybe that's for the best.

♪ ♪

- (MONITOR BEEPING STEADILY)
- (CAROL CRYING)

I don't want-want to hear this.

(SOBS) The immunotherapy saved me.

It-It's my miracle.

It was.

But it's causing your body
to att*ck itself.

The dr*gs prompt the body
to target the cancer,

but sometimes the immune system
reacts too aggressively.

AUSTIN: Attacking your healthy organs.

We need to stop
your immunotherapy temporarily.

To let your body heal.

Then you can consult
with your doctors and loved ones

to decide if you want
to continue the treatment

or stop it permanently.

CAROL: I've...

already decided.

I'm going to continue the immunotherapy.

(EXHALES)

Carol, this is a big decision.

Mom.

What you decide now

will determine
how we spend your final days.

(SHUDDERING)

Final days?

We knew when you started this drug

that this could be the last option.

But it would give us time.

And it did.

But now the time is limited.

Don't you say that.

Don't you give up on me.

I will never give up on you, Mom.

I promise.

(CRYING): Then help me do something.

CONRAD: There's no rush to decide.

(CAROL CRYING SOFTLY)

Let's revisit this later.

(SHUDDERING)

♪ ♪

I'm sorry, AJ.

I'm sorry.

My mother is dying,

and she won't face it.

She just needs time to process.

You both do.

I don't like being
on this side of the curtain.

I had my doubts about this,

- but the salmon's quite good.
- Mm.

I'm just thankful
I get to see both my girls.

What does Devon think of children?

It's the st century.

We're not in a rush.

Does your biological clock
know what century it is?

Mom.

It's not a bad idea to start
planning for the future.

The life of a surgeon is not
conducive to raising a family.

Not just in residency but forever.

Besides, surgery is a dangerous place.

Especially considering,
you know, your...

... your condition.

You mean my dyslexia?

- VINEETA: Mm.
- Yeah.

LEELA: You can say it.

- It's not a bad word.
- RAJ: I know.

Is that what this is about?

You're afraid I might k*ll someone?

Uh...

No, because, honestly, if you're
so concerned about my patients,

why don't you just ask me?

Like the young woman who came in
with adenoid cystic carcinoma.

I performed her double
mastectomy six months ago.

You want to know where she is right now?

She's backpacking through Spain.

Okay. You're making a scene.

You actually think dyslexia
is the hardest part of my job?

It's not.

It's you.

And your voices in my head

constantly telling me
I'm not good enough.

- Now you're just being cruel.
- I think I'm gonna go home.

- RAJ: Leela, come on.
- Yeah.

I'm gonna go home
to the apartment that I share

with my boyfriend.

- PADMA: Leela.
- Yeah.

Devon and I live together.

And you know what?
Don't worry about the bill.

At least there's one benefit to
having a surgeon for a daughter.

Leela.

(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)

(ELEVATOR WHIRRING)

First day in the bag?

You mean first and last.

I, uh...

I lied.

About medical school being easy.

Chastain wasn't my first choice.

It was the only one.

I mean, if I didn't match
here... (CHUCKLES)

I wouldn't have gotten
an internship spot anywhere.

- How is that possible?
- I got rejected from

every internship opportunity
I applied for.

I mean, the only reason I'm here

is because AJ wrote a recommendation.

He's a good guy.

But now I've
ruined every opportunity he gave me.

Dr. Pravesh cut me.

He said that?

With great satisfaction.

- (ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)
- (DOORS OPEN)

(PHONE CHIMES)

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

I threw you under the bus in there.

I'm really sorry.

It's okay.

No, it's not.

(EXHALES)

When I got leukemia,
it affected us both as children.

It took my fertility.

♪ ♪

But it also gave me
something far more powerful.

The ability to live each day
as if it were the last.

That freed me from everything,

including their judgment.

And you're free now, too.

I am so proud of you for
standing up for yourself today.

At the expense of ever having a
peaceful family gathering again.

(CHUCKLES) Nah.

Peace is overrated.

You demanded respect.

And I've never been prouder
to share your DNA.

♪ ♪

(SHUDDERS SOFTLY)

Shh.

- Hey.
- Hey, Doctor.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

Hey.

Billie told me you're
having some problems

- with Dr. Daniels.
- Mm.

Problems?

He's arrogant with no compassion.

Well, we all make mistakes.

Well, this isn't just about a mistake.

This is who he is.

I see a lot of problems ahead
with Trevor.

Well, let me give something a try,

maybe get a peek inside the kid, huh?

(SIGHS) Just don't let him
touch any patients.

♪ ♪

TREVOR: AJ's mom is sick?

I-I don't understand
what I'm supposed to do.

Nothing. You're here to watch, listen.

Don't offer the patient a cocktail.

How long until I live that one down?

Eh, intern idiocy
has a short news cycle.

But let me be clear.

If you step out of line, then...

it won't just be Pravesh
who comes for you.

Hi, Carol.

This is Dr. Daniels. He's an intern.

I was wondering if you'd be
kind enough to let him listen

while you and I talk about the future.

Of course.

AJ was an intern once.

But there's not much to talk about.

I've made my choice.

And I will make that happen for you.

I just want to help you
understand what you're choosing.

If either choice ends up k*lling me,

what difference does it make?

That's a good question.

It makes a big difference.

If... just if...

we stop the immunotherapy

to protect you from the symptoms
you're feeling now,

you will regain your energy.

Fevers, headaches, they'll go away.

You'll be able to get back
to the life you were living.

Until the cancer comes back.

Correct.

But you don't know how soon
your cancer will come back,

if at all.

You may have more life than you realize.

You can travel, you can exercise.

But when it's back,

it could return anywhere,
in any part of my body.

You've never felt a pain like this.

You're right.

But we can help you with that pain.

Now...

... if you continue the immunotherapy,

that's not a painless choice either.

I don't want to talk about it anymore.

♪ ♪

- Mrs. Austin.
- Hmm?

Carol.

Your son is the reason I'm a doctor.

- (CHUCKLES) I didn't know that.
- Mm-hmm.

He's, uh, a mentor, I guess.

And if we hadn't had a lot of,
uh, tough conversations,

you know, things that
scared the hell out of me,

I wouldn't be here.

A few years ago, AJ asked me
what kind of man I want to be.

(CHUCKLES) It wasn't easy
to get the answer.

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

Now Dr. Hawkins is asking you

what kind of life you want from here on.

Not an easy answer here either.

But I am learning that
it is the greatest respect

a doctor can show a patient.

Look, the immunotherapy has done wonders

at keeping your cancer at bay.

There's no reason to believe
it won't keep doing that.

Then what's the problem?

TREVOR: Well, the problem is

the symptoms that have destroyed
your quality of life

now will worsen.

Your heart stopped today.

It can happen again, and...

... it might k*ll you.

Your liver, adrenal, uh, thyroid glands,

one by one, will likely fail.

Carol, when that happens,
you'll be hospitalized.

You'll need surgeries,

medications, dialysis, ventilators.

(VOICE BREAKING): I have
fought so hard for so long.

And now you're telling me
there's no hope.

CONRAD: No.

That's not what we're saying, Carol.

We just...

- we just want you to clearly understand your options.
- (WHIMPERS)

What should I do?

There's no right or wrong answer.

- And you don't have to answer now.
- (CAROL SOBS QUIETLY)

We can take some time.
We can talk about it later.

(SIGHS)

♪ ♪

That was brutal.

We're all gonna die.

One day, we'll all be the patient.

We stand between them
and the day that moment comes.

And we owe them the truth.

And you found it hard
to give her the truth,

but you did it anyway
because the patient is

what comes first, not us.

Hey.

You did good in there.

Now,

if your interests come
before the patient again,

like they did earlier today,
then Dr. Pravesh is right.

This should be your last day
as a doctor.

(KNOCKING)

So?

Um...

He felt pain for Carol and AJ.
He wanted to help.

I could see that.

But...

would be a journey with him.

Yeah. I'm conflicted.

I'm thinking about my first day.

God knows I screwed up
worse than Trevor did.

You screwed up because of
a desperate need to help.

Your empathy is what got you in trouble,

not your self-interest.

As for Trevor, that's...

... that's your call.

Yeah.

I'll think about it.

Wait.

♪ ♪

(SIGHS) Listen.

What you did today,

every part of it,

is why you belong here.

I guess we both have
a big decision to make.

You're a good man, Dr. Pravesh.
Remember that.

I'm so sorry, AJ.

I had no idea.

I appreciate what you did back there.

Sorry to interrupt.

Can I steal Dr. Daniels for a second?

Yeah.

Uh, should I sit?

Nope.

This will be quick.

Okay.

Trevor, on my first day as an intern,

I ran a code on a -year-old drug user

for over a half an hour.

My resident, Dr. Hawkins,
told me to stop,

but I didn't listen.

I resuscitated her
until I got a heartbeat.

She was alive...

but brain-dead.

Her family wouldn't let her pass.

It prolonged the agony.

And Hawkins thr*aten to cut you.

I got another sh*t.

And now I'm gonna give one to you.

♪ ♪

Uh... th-thank you.

Seriously, I-I'll try
not to disappoint you.

Austin.

Hey.

I heard about Carol.

How are you?

Fine.

Oh, AJ, I'm so sorry.

(SNIFFLES)

Look, I talked to your boy today.

And I have hope for him.

(SIGHS) Me, too.

But, listen, he...

he thinks I recommended him to Chastain.

That I got him his residency.

Billie, I want you to know
I did no such thing.

I know.

I did.

♪ ♪

No man wants his mother
to pull strings for him.

Agreed.

But I'm not his mother.

Right.

None of that matters.

I want you to know,

if there's anything I can do
at all for Carol...

She wants hope.

And I can't give it to her.

(KNOCKING)

How did it go?

Said Gigi had a great day.

And you?

I wouldn't call it great,
but it was important.

I need to be here. I'm ready.

I'm ready to suit back up for Chastain.

Um...

So what about the work-life balance?

I have no idea.

(BOTH LAUGH)

But we'll make it work.

Welcome back, Dr. Hawkins.