01x08 - Home Sweet Home

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Hit-Monkey". Aired: November 17,2021 to present.*
Merchandise


A vengeful Japanese snow monkey and the ghost of an American assassin cut down Tokyo's underworld.
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01x08 - Home Sweet Home

Post by bunniefuu »

[pages riffling]

[dramatic theme playing]



[wind whooshing]

[grunts]

[monkeys hooting]

[owl hoots]
Huh?

[hooting]

[hooting]

[screeches]

[screeches]

[crunching]

[heaves]

[hooting]

[growls, grunts]

[monkey screeches]

[hooting]

[growls]

[screeches]

[grunting]

[choking]

[Monkey growls]

[grunts]

[whimpers]

[grunts]

[growls]

[whimpers]

[grunts]

[Monkey grunts]







[sighs]

[grunts]

[monkey hooting]

[screeching]

[grunts]

[growls]

[hooting, chattering]

[grunts]

[growls]

BRYCE: Yeah, yeah,
keep giving me that smug look.

[grunting]

I'm the one
who abandons people! Me!

Me, me, me, me!
That's my thing!

You can't just steal it!

Ohh!

Oh, thank god.

Oh, thank you, god!

Oh my god.

You know, I-I take back
every janitor joke I ever made, okay.

[stammers]
No, hey, hey!

[screams]

[men laughing]

[sniffles]

[groans]

No, hey! Hey! Use a mop!

No! No! No!
No, no, no, no, no!



Bryce, baby, this is Clint.

Mama's new friend.

Hey there.
How's it going there, slugger?

- How you doing there, kiddo?
- Hey there, bubba.

- MAN : Whatchu say, bubba?
- MAN : Come on, rockstar.

- MAN : Hey there, boy.
- MAN : What's up, chief?

You and me,
we gonna be friends, alright.

We gonna be
real good friends.

Hell yeah.



GIRL: Hi.
I'm Hayley.

Nice to meet you.



Hey, Bryce, baby, I got someone
I want you to meet.

- This is Eli.
- Uh, yeah. Whatever.

ELI:
Well, hello.

It's real nice
to meet ya... Bryce.





[hooting]

[grunting]

[hooting]

[grunts]

[laughing]

[hooting]



[grunting]



ELI:
Okay, try it again!

[engine starts]

Hey, you were right.

It was the carburetor!

Ha ha, lookit there.

Ah, it don't get
much better than this.

[baby cooing]

- Remember that, Bryce.
- [chuckles] Yeah.

Hey, uh, grab me a rag
out of the glovebox, would you?

- Oh, uh, yeah.
- Oh, hey, wait a second.

What's this?

- Why do you have this?
- sh*t.

Okay, look, that's from
a long time ago.

I had trouble.

But I handled it.

I left it in the past
where it can't find me.

I'd never do anything
to hurt you or your family.

Bryce, I promise.

Atta boy.

Now let's get
this sucker fired up.

Do some donuts
in the Circuit City parking lot.

Come on! Ha ha, there she goes.

Oh, she sounds good.

[agitated hooting, screeching]

[grunting]

[growls]

[grunting]



[whines, grunts]



[hooting]

[grunting]



[bb's f*ring]

BRYCE:
Gah! Okay, here we go.

Ugh!
[giggling]

Wha... Don't laugh.

Just give me that one.

I'll tell you,
th-th-this game's rigged.

Iris. [chuckles]

How did you get so cute?



BRYCE:
Oh-ho-ho, hell yeah!

How about this?
I make my own rum living here.

You know? Raise some dolphins!
[laughs]

I don't even like the beach.

Can you even live
in space?

Yeah! Yeah, you know,
you float everywhere.

You sip Tang
and skip moon rocks.

You know, just me, you,
and the eight kids. Huh?

I ain't having no eight kids
with you, Bryce McHenry.

[chuckles]

[gasps]

That's where I wanna go.

A place where
everybody's doing something.

[awkward laugh] I...
I-I don't know, babe.

Big cities take, like,
you know, big money.

I... Plus things aren't
so bad here, are they? Right?

Nah.
They ain't so bad, I guess.

[shutter clicks]



It sure is nice of Eli
to let us use his truck so much.

MAN: Where's Elwin?
[Bryce groaning]

Who?
Who are you talking about?

- Bryce! Hey!
- Hey, man, let her go!

Don't you play dumb, kid.

We tracked that truck.
We know he's here.

We don't know an Elwin!

This is Eli's truck!

Well, then Eli's got
some 'splaining to do

for the trouble
down in El Paso.

I mean, yeah, we-well he's got
some explaining to do here, too!

He was dating my mom
and then just left her last week

without saying
a word! So...

You think we're playing?
[g*n cocks]

What the hell is going on?

No... No, I swear!
I swear! Please!

Please, okay, look,
he cleaned out her savings,

stole her car and then just,
you know, took off!

I mean, that's why
we have the truck!

- g*dd*mn Elwin.
- Yeah, sounds like El Paso.

That scumbag double-crossed us.

Took a lot of money,
and we want it back.

When you see Elwin,
or Eli, whatever,

you tell him
payback's coming his way.

With a full clip.



[growls]

[grunting]



[growls]

[roars, grunts]

[monkeys hooting, screeching]



[hooting]



[hooting]

[rope creaks]

[screeching]

[growling]



[growls]

[screeching, grunting]

[hooting, screeching]

[growling]



[screeches]

[growls]

[ominous music playing]







[panting]

[whimpers]



[whines]



[screeches]

[sobs]



[whines]





[monkeys screeching]

[growls]

[screeching]

[growls]

[grunting forcefully]

[g*nsh*t]




[growls]

[g*nshots]

[clicking]



[wind whooshing]



[whimpers]



[sighs]



Eli!
Eli, where are you going?

Goddammit, Judy,
I don't have time for this!

Hold up, you are not gonna
walk out on us!

- Just get...
- Ah!

[glass shatters]

Oh sh*t.

Why'd you make me do that?

[g*n cocks]



Phew! I thought
you were somebody else.



What? That?

Come on, it was an accident.

You know I love your mama.

Oh yeah, yeah.
No, you're a real peach,

- aren't you, Elwin?
- Hey, man. Uh.

I don't know what you heard but...

I heard about your trouble!
Okay?

- You said it wouldn't hurt us!
- Bryce, look at me.

I know things are scary
right now.

I know that g*n is shaking
in your hand,

and you don't know what to do.

I know 'cause
about years ago,

I was standing
in a real similar spot.

And trust me:

you pick up a g*n in anger,

you ain't never gonna
put it back down.

Just let me walk out that door.

Come on,
what do you say... champ?

No, don't!
[g*nsh*t]

[groans]

- Oh sh*t!
- ELI: What the...

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.

You did it now, boy.

[gasping, groaning]

They'll put you down for this.

[coughs]

Start running,

'cause they ain't
never gonna let you go.

[grunting]

This is your life now.

[sobbing]

Oh sh*t.



[sobbing]

[sobbing]

[sobbing]

[monkey growls]



[grunting]

[hooting]

[growls]

[whimpers]

[Monkey whines]





[panting]



[owl hoots]



[hoots]









[beep]

Uh, ten on two. Please.

How much are these?

[sirens wailing]

[engine starts]

[Michael Nau's
While You Stand playing]



♪ I am a mountain ♪

♪ High as can be ♪

♪ Yes, and I am
an ocean while you ♪


♪ While you stand by me ♪

♪ Where I won't ♪

♪ Where I won't ♪

BRYCE: I'm running
so you don't have to.


Take care
of our baby girl.


I love you.

[Hayley sobs]

Oh, Bryce.

♪ I knew the starlight ♪

[door slams]

♪ Laid by its bed ♪

[coughing]

♪ Felt all its waterfalls ♪

♪ Falling against my head ♪

Look, man, I...
[hooting]



We're a tribe.

Yeah, you know,
I-I like the sound of that.







[screeching]

Look, man. I'm, uh...

You know, I-I'm sorry
if I was a bad mentor before.

It's just, um,
well, I've had a few of those,

and I know what they can do
to a guy.

[hooting]

Oh, no, no, no, no.
It's not okay.

Okay, I-I screwed up
a lot of things in my life,

and, well,
I don't want that for you.

So, you know,
you deserve better.

[Monkey whines]
Yeah.

So let's, uh, let's bring
this vengeance thing home.

You know? You get on
with your life.

I, uh... I get done
with mine, right?

And then, uh, we got what?
Like two weeks before the election?

Plenty of time
to plan our next move.

What's wrong?

Oh sh*t!



Uh, hold up.

How long was I in there?

[grunts]

[ Alarm's Evil Heart playing]



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