03x16 - Honey, You Shrunk the Fit

[bunniefuu]

♪ I don't know how but I've
been dreaming about this ♪

♪ So I'll do whatever it takes ♪

♪ To find my own way

(cheers)

Noodle, that was your best performance yet.

And the place is so packed,
I couldn't tell which one

of your adoring fans was yelling "woo-hoo!"

-It was you, Dad. -No wonder he was so loud.

I bet they're all here because
of my new music profile.

I've been getting a lot of new followers.

That's because of her incredibly talented,

brilliant and humble social media manager.

Come on, Max, let's let
her hang with the cool kids.

And by that, I mean not you.

Hi, Sydney? I'm Zoey. I just wanted to say

you like totes k*lled that performance.

Your songs slap, girl.

I'm kind of a stan.

Wow.

Thanks, I've always wanted a stan.

Yaasss, and I am def not the only one.

There was some guy yelling "woo-hoo"
throughout the whole performance.

So you were saying you're a stan?

Huge. I'm also a brand
manager at Britney Nashville.

Have you guys heard of us?

Are you kidding? I love your clothes.

I'm obsessed with Britney Nashville.

Britney Nashville girls take
up half of my social media feed.

The other half is animals dressed as celebrities.

My favorite is Scarlett Jo-hamster.

So Sydney, we are looking for

up-and-coming influencers to partner with

and I am vibing on your content.

How would you like to be an
official Britney Nashville girl?

Me? A Britney Nashville girl?
I've always wanted to be one.

How does this work?

Mostly, we send you a bunch of free clothes

and you post pics wearing them.

Okay, let me consult with
my social media manager.

(both scream)

We've discussed it and
we'd like to accept your offer.

Perf! I'll DM you the deets,

and we will send you some new fits. Bye!

Both: Bye!

(both scream)

(theme music playing)

♪ Like father, like daughter,
we don't always agree ♪

♪ But looking at you is like looking at me ♪

♪ The more things change,
the more they stay the same ♪

♪ Like father, like daughter,
from different times ♪

♪ Taking all the best from your decade and mine ♪

♪ The more things change ♪

♪ The more they stay the same ♪

♪ Do, do, do-do, do, do

♪ Do, do

♪ The more they stay the same

♪

Hey, Max. Bad news.

I just got an e-mail from Cousin Archie,

his birthday party is coming up in two weeks.

Oh, seriously? He's so obnoxious.

Remember last year when he made us all play

Pin the Tail on the Archie?

I won, but the prize was
a full body pillow of him.

So really, I lost.

I can't do another one of his parties.

Well, what are we going to do?

If we don't go, we'll never hear the end of it.

Or we can say we can't make it

because we already planned a vacation together.

Wow. Sounds like a really expensive way

to get out of a party,

but it's Archie, so I'm in.

Not a real one.

We'll just take some fake pics of us on vacation

and post them online.

He'll never know the difference.

You really think that'll work?

Please. I've gotten out of two weddings

and a baby shower by "going to Australia."

So that's why there was a
kangaroo in our backyard.

Hey, Dad, did I just hear the doorbell?

Syd, you've asked me five times already.

Don't worry, your clothes will get here soon.

What if they changed their mind?

What if Zoey decided another girl

was more Britney Nashville than I am?

(doorbell rings)

Ah! It's here!

Take that, other girl.

Hi, I'm from Britney Nashville.

This is the greatest day of my life.

I get that a lot.

Wow. Even the box is cooler than me,

and that's not true of most packages.

Oh, I gotta text Olive.

I promised I'd wait to open it with her.

(doorbell rings)

It's here, it's here!

Olive, were you following the delivery truck?

Of course not. I was hiding in the bushes.

Whoa, is that the wrestler, Mr. Concrete?

He must be in town for the
big Ruckus Rumble event.

I can't believe he's here.

He's one of the best pro wrestlers of all time.

One of? He is the best.

He b*at the Venomous Viper
by breaking a stool on him,

then a chair, then a table.

All right, personally, I
think the table was overkill.

Wait, you watch wrestling?

Are you kidding? My favorite day of the year

is when the Ruckus Rumble is on.

I can't believe it's only two weeks away.

I'm so psyched to watch it.

I'm going to go get his autograph.

Mr. Concrete, would you mind signing this

and making it out to Alisha, your biggest fan?

I'd be happy to, Alisha.

Man, everyone looks up to Mr. Concrete,

especially Alisha.

I wish I had muscles like that guy.

Personally, I'm happy with my body.

I got arms to lift a laptop, legs to dance,

and a face that won't quit.

I gotta bulk up.

I know I can't look like Mr. Concrete,

but that doesn't mean I can't get some muscles.

True, but it takes a lot of
hard work and dedication.

Which are two things I've been meaning to try.

Well, if you're willing to commit,

I could be your trainer.

Really, you can do that?

Yeah, I helped my uncle get in shape

for a bodybuilding competition.

Did he win?

Yeah, but unfortunately,

he hurt his back lifting the trophy.

What are you waiting for? Open it, open it!

I can't believe this.

Britney Nashville girls always look so perfect.

I never thought I'd be one of them.

And I never thought I'd
be besties with one of them

and get to share all her free clothes!

We'll circle back.

Ooh, look at these tops and this skirt.

And the most amazing jumpsuit

I have ever seen.

Syd, that is so you.

Well, I am a Britney Nashville girl.

And look, the best part is all the clothes

are one size fits all.

That means everything is going to fit.

Well, not everything.

It's a little tight in the front.

Let me see the back.

Okay, I'm starting to like the front better.

Try on something else.

Sleeves too big. Pants too long.

Skirt too tight.

Too much neck. Nothing they sent fits me.

I thought their clothes were
supposed to fit everyone.

Maybe we can build an outfit around this.

A bracelet?

At least that fits.

What's wrong with me?

How can I be a Britney Nashville girl

if the only thing that fits is this bracelet?

Aw, come on.

I don't get it. I thought Britney Nashville

was supposed to be one size fits all.

What am I going to do?

I promised Zoey I'd post pics in these clothes.

I guess you'll just have
to tell her they don't fit.

And give up being a Britney Nashville girl?

No way.

Hey, girls, your dad and I

are about to take pictures for our fake vacation.

Do either of you have a large rubber lobster?

Sorry, I got fresh or frozen. No rubber.

Okay, forget the lobster.

What about a life-size inflatable shark?

What kind of terrifying vacation is this?

Hey, you have your dream vacay, I have mine.

Syd, what are you going to do?

You still have to post those pictures.

You know what?

Grandma's fake vacation
photo sh**t gave me an idea.

I don't actually have to fit into the clothes,

I just have to look like I do.

And I don't actually have to understand

what you're talking about,
I just have to look like I do.

Okay, Max, for the next two weeks,
don't think of me as your friend, Leo.

I'm your trainer, Coach Webb.

And Coach Webb takes no mercy.

But if he gets too rough,
your buddy Leo can talk to him.

Let's do this. I invited Alisha

over for the Ruckus Rumble in two weeks,

and I want to impress her with my new muscles.

Not a lot of time,

but if you listen to every
word I say, we got this.

All right. What do you want to focus on?

Mostly my tri-tips and my trapezoids.

Really want to get my en-dolphins flowing.

Okay, tri-tips are steaks, trapezoids are shapes,

and en-dolphins are...
well, they're just dolphins.

(door opens)

Two questions, what's going on here?

And two, do I even want to know?

I'm getting buff.

Is this because I laughed when
you couldn't lift the meatloaf?

You told me it was stuck to the counter.

And no, I'm doing this for other reasons.

-Alisha? -Ding, ding. We have a winner.

Max, do you really think this is what girls like?

Don't you think they prefer
someone sensitive who listens?

Ew, why would they want that?

It's a good thing you're cute.

Last thing, we got to track your progress

to make sure you're going from scrawny to brawny.

(door closes)

How's it looking?

Like we need to get started
sooner rather than later.

Okay, Max, let's see your bicep curls.

Okay, let's see a bicep curl.

Max, this medicine ball is
much heavier than it looks.

Yeah, yeah, just throw it already.

-Oh. -(thud)

You think we could swing by the supermarket?

This ice cream could really use some sprinkles.

Okay, Max, say, uh,

"Getting out of Archie's dumb
party with a fake vacation."

You really think Archie is worth all that?

Good point.

Both: Cheese.

(phone camera clicks)

You know, I thought after
this we could ride fake jet skis.

What's your rush? This is nice,
sitting here relaxing with you.

You know what, it is.

Here's to lying on the beach.

(chuckles)

Both: (slurp) Mm. Ah.

You know what, I'm going
to go order room service.

You mean you want me to make
dinner and bring it to your room?

Just leave it by the door.

Whoa, Noodle, looking good.

Thanks, Grandma.

Hey, are those the Britney Nashville clothes?

Yeah, we're about to do a photo sh**t.

Uh, why don't we sh**t against the wall?

You know, I'm not up on all the latest trends,

but do all the cool clothes
have chip clips on the back?

Technically, the clothes don't fit me.

So we're just going to fake it for some photos.

Well, if the clothes don't fit,

then why are you going to all this trouble?

It's a big deal to be chosen
to represent this brand.

It could give me exposure
and do a lot for my career.

Yeah, but is it really worth it

if you have to pretend to
be something you're not?

Says the man wearing a tropical shirt

and drinking out of a coconut.

Well, this is--

You know, I've got some room service to deliver.

All right, future influencer,
let's sh**t some pics.

(door closes)

Uh, Syd, your face looks a little weird.

It's 'cause the chip clips
are digging into my back.

(sighs)

Why don't I sit down?

Standing it is.

(phone camera clicks)

Okay, let's check them out.

I don't know, the outfit still
doesn't look good on me.

Well, that's easy to fix.

We'll just smooth your sides,

adjust your legs, move your arms,

contour your face and throw on a filter.

Are you sure we should be doing all that?

Maybe my dad was right.

Feels like we're lying about how I look.

Whoa, I look good!

Eighteen, , .

Let's see how big your muscles are.

Yeah, it's all about the gains, bro.

We'll see what the tape measure says.

You know what? Forget about the tape.

The important thing is you believe you're bigger.

It didn't go up?

The good news is it didn't go down.

What? But I worked so hard.

Alisha's coming over for
the Ruckus Rumble tomorrow.

I'll never impress her now.

I wish there was some way to fake it,

but it's not like you can
just slap on some muscles.

That's genius. I'll just slap on some muscles.

As Coach Webb, I'm disappointed.

As your friend Leo, why didn't I see that coming?

Did you see how many likes
these new pics are getting, Syd?

I did. People are commenting on me

like I used to comment
on Britney Nashville girls.

Wow. What's next?

Your own signature fragrance, Sydney by Sydney.

It smells like lavender, sandalwood,

and a hint of ranch dressing.

What? I'm hungry.

And all we had to do was filter a few pictures.

Oh, did you see what Zoey
commented on the last one?

"No cap, your drip is straight fire.

Pull out a rake 'cause this is so leafy."

I always knew I was leafy.

You don't know what it means either, do you?

Not a clue.

(doorbell rings)

Oh, my gosh, another
Britney Nashville box? Thanks.

Of course, keep crushing it.

"Thought you could rock this
dress from our new collection.

Can't wait to see you wear it
at your next show. XO, Zoey."

She wants to see me
wearing this dress... in person.

As in no smoothing, no contouring, no filters?

Yep, but it's not going to fit.

None of their stuff fits.

Once they find out, no more
being a Britney Nashville girl.

So what are you going to do?

Well, if the dress doesn't fit me,

I'll have to make myself fit into the dress.

What a great run, Olive.

Doesn't it make you feel alive?

(panting) I... want to... die.

Don't worry, we're done.

So, tomorrow night is my performance

and I should be able to squeeze
into the dress Zoey sent by now.

Now come on, let's go up to my room.

You coming?

Is it too much to ask you to
move your room downstairs?

Good news, I finally got it zipped.

(strained): Bad news, I can't breathe.

Syd, how are you going to sing in that dress

if you can't breathe?

Breathing's overrated.

And those sleeves are so tight,
how are you going to strum the guitar?

Strumming is overrated.

How are you going to walk on stage?

Okay, I'm beginning to think this doesn't fit.

But I still have time. I
can squeeze in a long run.

Syd, you're going too far.

It's one thing to filter some pictures,

but to change the way you look in real life?

You're right, Olive.

Why am I pushing myself
to fit someone else's idea

of how I should look?

Britney Nashville shouldn't get to decide

what size is right for all girls.

Yeah, we think these Britney
Nashville girls are perfect,

but I bet they filter their
pictures just like we did.

You know what? My body isn't the problem.

I like it just the way it is.

The problem is these clothes.

I mean, this isn't a dress. It's a long T-shirt.

And this isn't a skirt.

It's one leg of a pair of shorts.

And this isn't a tube top. It's a--

Oh, wait, yeah, that is a tube top.

So what are you going to do?

Zoey's expecting you to
wear their clothes at your show.

(sighs) Hmm.

I said I'd wear them... and I will.

Well, whatever your plan is, I'm on board.

Wait, does it involve running?

-No. -Good, then I'm on board.

Come on, Max! Alisha's going to be here

any minute to watch the Ruckus Rumble.

Let's see those biceps.

Oh.

Look at these guys,

You can't even tell they're balled-up tube socks.

I'd never know the difference
if it wasn't for the stench.

(doorbell rings)

There she is.

-Hey, Max. -Alisha, so happy you're here.

Where do you want to watch the match?

In the basement... or on the couch?

Max, you look... different.

Oh, (chuckles) these bad boys?

Eh, I've been working out a little.

Okay, why don't the three of us

and those "bad boys" sit
down and watch the match.

Hey, Max, I can't find any of your tube socks.

Oh. Never mind.

Sorry, I hope there's room for me and my muscles.

Max, why is your muscle upside-down?

Huh? What?

Oh, uh, sometimes when
they're so strong, they need to rest.

I'm going to go to the kitchen
and pretend this isn't awkward.

Max, why are you wearing fake muscles?

You knew?

I could tell from the second I walked in.

Then why didn't you say anything?

I didn't want to hurt your feelings.

I tried my best to get real muscles, but...

I just couldn't.

Why would you do that?

Well... I guess because
I've always felt so scrawny.

And girls like muscles, don't they?

I mean, you like wrestlers.

Max, I like wrestling because it's silly and fun.

And it's a great excuse to scream at the TV.

Max, the best part about you

is you always flex your biggest muscle...

your heart.

Thanks, Alisha.

That means a lot.

You ready to watch the match?

Let's do it.

(TV turns on, crowd cheers)

Rip his head off, Mr. Concrete!

Rip it off! Rip! It! Off!

This is nice.

Syd, Zoey just walked in.

Are you sure you want to go through with this?

Well, I was sure until you asked if I was sure.

-Now I'm not so sure. -You should be sure.

-You sure? -I'm sure.

You're right.

I have to do this, not just for me,

but for every other girl who's
felt bad about themselves

trying on Britney Nashville clothes.

(sighs)

Here goes nothing.

Hey, Olive. I am so amped

to see Syd slay in our dress.

I'm going to take so many pics for our grid.

It's going to be very leafy.

Whoa.

Crispy use of leafy.

And now the star of our show, you know her,

you love her, and I raised her,

Sydney Reynolds! Woo-hoo!

(cheers and applause)

O.M.G. What is she wearing?

Britney Nashville.

The whole store?

♪ How can I say this?

♪ My hands are shaking

♪ I feel the weight all around ♪

♪ I want to see the world and
meet the girl I'm becoming ♪

♪ But I don't want to leave you behind ♪

(cheers and applause)

I'm so proud of you.

Sydney.

Look... I'm sorry I cut up the clothes.

I thought all I wanted was
to be a Britney Nashville girl,

but I realized I'm not one-size-fits-all.

I'm one-of-a-kind.

And so is every other girl.

Syd, it's chill.

I'm not salty.

This isn't exactly on brand,
but points were made.

-Really? -TBH, if you want the real tea...

the clothes don't fit me either.

See? Samesies.

Then why don't you say anything?

I guess I didn't think I could,
but you've given me such inspo,

I'm going to bring it up in our next design sesh.

Thanks, Syd.

Back off, Zoey.

Syd tried to fit into your clothes

but it was impossible.

Olive, Zoey totally gets it.

Oh. Then as her social media manager,

I'd like to say thank you for this opportunity.

Saved it.

Posting more pics for your followers?

Uh, kind of. I'm taking down
the Britney Nashville ones

and putting up some unfiltered originals.

I want to have the real me out there.

I'm proud of you, Syd.

I know that wasn't easy.

Thanks.

Oh, speaking of, how did it go
with the fake vacation photos?

Did you get out of Cousin
Archie's birthday party?

We'll see. Grandma just posted them.

Well, he totally bought it.

Yes! No lame party.

The only problem is I just got an email from him

saying our vacation looked like so much fun,

he wants to come with us next year.

No! What are we going to do?

Didn't you learn anything from me?

Just be honest.

Oh, he wants you to come too.

So what are we thinking, fake tornado?

-Oh, yeah. -Good one.

♪ Do, do, do-do, do, do

♪ Do, do

♪ Do, do, do-do, do, do

♪ Do, do

♪ Do, do, do-do, do, do

♪ Do, do

♪ Do, do, do-do, do, do

♪ Do, do

Oh, yeah.

(drumroll)