03x01 - The Last Dance

[bunniefuu]

(bell rings)

♪ When I wake up in the morning
and the alarm gives out a warning ♪

♪ I don't think I'll ever
make it on time ♪

♪ By the time I grab my books
and I give myself a look ♪

♪ I'm at the corner just in time
to see the bus fly by ♪

♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

♪ If the teacher pops a test
I know I'm in a mess ♪

♪ And my dog ate
all my homework last night ♪

♪ Ridin' low in my chair,
she won't know that I'm there ♪

♪ If I can hand it in tomorrow
it will be all right ♪

♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell... ♪

♪ It's all right,
'cause I'm saved by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right, 'cause I'm saved
by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right,
'cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

The Bayside Costume Ball
is this week

and I plan to be chosen king.

And guess who I want
as my queen.

Hi, Zack.

That is not my queen.
That's the royal doofus.

There's my queen.

Kelly, thou art more
hotteth today than usual.

Thank you, Zacketh.
Why are we talking like thiseth?

It could be an overbite.
You might need braces.

No, it's 'cause we're going to
the costume ball as Romeo and Juliet.

I can't wait to see you
in those tights, Preppie.

Oh, yeah?
What are you going as?

We're going as history's
greatest lovers.

You're going as Sonny and Cher?

No. We're going as Cleopatra
and Marc Antony.

Those guys wore mini-skirts, Slater.
Better shave your legs.

Hey, we got to talk, Jessie.

Zack, I don't think I can go.
I mean, costumes are expensive

and money's really tight at home.
I should look for a job.

Kelly, they're looking
for a waitress at The Max.

- Great, I'll go during lunch.
- Okay. You get the job

and I'll get the costumes.

I'm going as Mel Gibson.

It'll be easier getting a date.

Why don't you go
as The Invisible Man?

I would, but I don't know
what he looks like.

(bell rings)

You guys, we better go.
Don't forget our band

is practicing
after school today. Bye.

Oh, no. If I get a job,
I won't be able to play in the band.

Oh, that's okay, Kelly.
Getting a job is more important.

Okay.

- You all finished?
- Yes, sir.

Please call me Jeff. Sir makes me
feel like I'm losing my hair.

Okay. Little smiley faces
in the O's.

I've never seen
that before. Nice.

I'm a happy person.

I'm also very punctual.
Well, I'm late sometimes...

only if I'm not
in the bathroom first.

Okay. I'll stay out
of the bathroom.

I also have
a very pleasant attitude.

Most people like me.
I'm usually very up.

- Aren't you gonna write that down?
- Oh. Sorry.

"Often perky."

How come I haven't
seen you here before?

I just transferred here
from Michigan.

- I'm a sophomore over at UCLA.
- Go Bruins! Did I get the job?

You seem like a nice girl
and I'm sure you do a great job--

Then I'm hired!
All right!

Pardon my perkiness.

I would love to hire you, but the owner
wants an experienced waitress.

Oh, I have experience.
I come from a big family.

I set and clear the dinner-table
for nine people, three times a week

and I don't spill a thing.
Please.

Okay. I'll take a chance.
I'll hire you on a probationary basis.

Oh, thank you-- thank you.
You won't regret this.

- What does that mean?
- It means, we'll try it out

for a couple of days and if you
do well, the job is yours.

Oh, it'll be great.
I promise.

Today doesn't count, does it?

And don't forget, this year,

no Mr. Belding costumes.

Mrs. Belding gets
confused easily.

Oh-- oh-- oh.

And all the boys who dress as girls
must still use the boys' room.

- Understood?
- Slater: All right, Mr. B. Fine.

I'd like to discuss the coronation
ceremony of the king and queen.

Hey, that's a good idea.
Where should Kelly and I stand?

Behind Jessie and me
with all the other losers.

Zack: Yeah,
that's what you think.

All right, now.
All right.

Lisa? Ollie?
What about decorations?

Well, decorations committee
hit a minor snag.

- What's the snag?
- There are no decorations.

We have no money.

We were hoping to hang
Screech from the ceiling.

Hey. I refuse
to be a piñata again.

Forget it. Any extra money was
already budgeted for a deejay.

Why don't we forget about
the deejay and give Lisa

money to decorate the gym?
Our band will play for free.

Are you kids any good?

Are you kidding?
We're better than MC Hammer.

And I'd like to hit you
with MC's hammer.

All right, all right. You can play
but on one condition--

I get to sing one song with the band. See,
I'm a rocker from way back.

(laughs)

- This sandwich stinks.
- Waitress. Yo!

- Is there a problem?
- Yeah. You.

Sid didn't order mayo.

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought
you asked for mayonnaise.

I want the manager of this dump.

You don't have to bother him.
I'll get you a new sandwich.

And we're not paying
for this garbage.

Is there a problem here, Kelly?

- No-- no, there's no problem.
- Sweet cheeks screwed up the order.

I said I'd fix it. I'll even
pay for it out of my tips.

Kelly, you know the rules.
The customer is always right.

(laughing)

Until now.
This order is to go.

And let me give you guys
a little tip. Get lost!

I'm sorry. I should've
handled that much better.

You're doing a fine job. Don't let
a couple of sleazeballs bother you.

Here come a couple of guys
I know I can handle.

Zack: All right, Kelly.
You got the job.

No, I'm on probation. I have to prove
to my boss that I'm a good waitress.

You're wonderful.
He's lucky to have you.

Thanks guys.
I even made $ in tips.

Great, then you can
pay for our lunch.

She's working, nim-wad.
She doesn't buy our food.

- We'll each have a burger.
- Okay. What do you want to drink?

Give me a pineapple-papaya-
cranberry sparkler.

Or milk.

One cow juice coming right up.

- That's my boss.
- Screech: Oh, yeah?

Don't worry, we're cool.

Kelly, you're the best waitress
we've ever had at The Max.

It a shame to waste such
great service on such rotten food.

- Screech, please.
- Hi, guys. Is everything okay?

What a waitress.
She serves french fries

just like a real French person.

- (yelps)
- That's why I hired her.

- I'll go put your order in.
- All right.

- Are those friends of yours?
- Yeah, they're just trying

- to make me look good.
- They don't have to try very hard.

You already look
pretty good to me.

- (knocks)
- Come in.

Forsooth, yonder sits
my blue jean queen.

Guess what. I got the job
and I made $ in tips.

Hey that's great.
Now wait till you see this.

Kelly, wiliest thou hangeth
with me at the costume ball

and be my... Juliet?

Oh, Zack.

It's beautiful.

I don't know what to say.

Well, start with a yes
followed by a long kiss

and I'll take over from there.

Zack, I really appreciate
everything you've done,

but I have to work.
My family needs me right now.

Every little bit helps.

Come on, Kelly.
It's only one Saturday night.

What if I tip you?
I'm a big tipper.

Zack, I just got the job.

I couldn't ask for time off
this soon.

I'm sorry.

Me too.

(rock music playing)

♪ When we met I knew ♪

♪ Right from the start ♪

♪ If you wanted to-- ♪

(Off-key chord plays)

Sorry. Was it me?

It's been you all morning.
What's the problem?

I just can't stop
thinking about Kelly.

I can't stop thinking
about Denzel Washington,

but I'm still able
to live my life.

Aw, I'm just bummed.
Kelly won't ask for the night off.

Well, then why don't you
ask her boss for her?

Hey, that's not a bad idea.

Excuse me. Jeff?
Hi, I'm Zack Morris. Remember me?

Yeah-- yeah. Don't tell me.
You're the pineapple-prune juice guy.

No-- no. I'm the medium-burger-
hold-the-onions guy.

Also known as
Kelly's boyfriend Zack.

Boyfriend? Kelly never
mentioned a boyfriend.

If she didn't mention me,
you must be working her too hard.

It's a good thing
I came when I did.

- Why? What's wrong?
- Well, we better sit down.

Gosh.

You see, Jeff, Kelly is
an only child and this Saturday

is her father's birthday.
Now, it would break

his already weak heart
if his only daughter

wasn't there to help him
blow out the candles.

Having a sick parent must
be really rough on an only child.

Oh, man, it's the worst.
You can't imagine.

Oh, I can.
Especially, when that only child

has six brothers and sisters.

Oh, so that's who
those people were.

I thought they were
very short aunts and uncles.

Come on, Zack.
What gives?

All right, look. Saturday is
a big costume ball at school

and I want Kelly to come, but she's
afraid to ask for the night off.

Why didn't you just say so?

- What, you mean you'll do it?
- Yeah, sure. Why not?

Hey. You're a great guy
just like Kelly said.

She did?
That's nice.

And Jeff's majoring in pre-law
with a minor in romance languages.

I've heard that line before.

It's not a line, Lisa. He's so nice
once you get to know him.

I feel like I've known him
my whole life.

You've been blabbing
about him all night.

- Have not.
- Yes, you have.

I know everything about him
but his shoe size.

/ . You were
in the bathroom.

Call me crazy, but I think
you've got a thing for this guy.

Get out!
Just because he's hot--

I mean, kind of good looking,
doesn't mean I like him.

I don't know, Kelly,
you seem hung up on this guy.

I am not.
Come on, he's my boss.

Yeah, and I bet you guys have
a very professional relationship.

Yes, and speaking of relationships,
whatever happened to that cute guy

you used to date?
I think his name was Zack.

Guys, I still love Zack.

Jeff's just a new friend.
That's all.

Yeah right,
and acne's a turn on.

You know, I am b*at.

I must have served
a zillion hamburgers tonight.

Then I guess it's time
for you to rest your buns.

Hey, I'm not complaining.
I made $ in tips tonight.

Not bad. Sounds like you
can afford to take a night off.

What do you mean?

Kelly, everybody is talking about
this costume ball.

Now, why aren't you going?

Jeff, I just got this job.

I couldn't ask
for time off already.

If you'd like to go,
take the night off. It's okay with me.

Are you sure you're
not gonna miss me, here?

Of course, I'm gonna miss you.
I always miss you when you're gone.

You do?

- You're terrific, Kelly.
- You too, Jeff.

You know, you're the nicest guy
I've met in a long time.

I better get going.
I'll see you tomorrow.

Kelly, I want to talk to you
about that kiss last night.

I hope it didn't
cause you a problem.

Jeff, the problem is...
I liked it.

Hey, guys, I've just got one thing
to say about Kelly's new career.

She is a knockout
in that waitress uniform.

Whoa. You can
say that again.

No, you won't say that again.

What a stupid idea.

Hey, Kelly. Why don't you
come over and sit down?

- I don't think I can.
- Of course, you can.

- Can't you take a break?
- Yeah, in fact, Kelly,

why don't you sit right here
so Screech has to move?

You just want to stare
across the table into my eyes.

Hey guys. Kelly's boss
gave her the night off.

Now she can go to the dance
with me. Isn't that great?

- Yeah.
- That's wonderful.

Sounds like fun.

Now, should I go as Bart Simpson
and shave my head

or as Al Bundy
and shave my back?

Why don't you go as Barf Bundy
and put your head in a bag?

Wait a second.
What do we do about Belding?

Major earplug alert.
He still plans on singing.

That's no problem. We'll just crank up the
feedback and drown him out.

Oh, hi, guys.
Can I get you something?

Yeah. One celery-
rhubarb-turnip tonic.

- Sorry, we just sold the last one.
- Then give me a milk

with an olive in it.

I better get back to work,
my break's almost over.

There's no rush, Kelly.
Take as much time as you want.

- Zack: All right.
- Hey, nice boss.

You know, if I ever have to work,
which I never plan on doing,

I hope it's for you.

Jeff, thanks again for giving
my girl the night off on Saturday.

Yeah, sure.
No problem.

Have fun at the dance.

- What's wrong?
- I'm at work, Zack.

- You're on a break.
- Just don't, okay?

I have to go.
See you guys later.

Hey, did either of you guys
notice anything different

- about Kelly at The Max?
- Yeah. She's a waitress now.

I know that, noodle head.

It's kind of weird. I feel like
I'm getting the cold shoulder.

Sounds like the flu to me.
I'd wear a turtleneck tomorrow.

You are a strange
and weird person.

Thanks for noticing.

Hey, Slater. Do you think
Kelly likes somebody else?

Unh-uh. No way.
She passed me over for you.

Who's left for her to like?

She did bring me
an extra pickle today.

I wonder what that meant.

Naw. It's probably
just my imagination.

Yeah. Besides, where
would she meet anyone?

She's at school all day.
Don't worry about it.

You're right.
I'm worrying over nothing.

And the rest of the time
she's working at The Max

with that good-looking
college guy Jeff.

♪ When we met I knew ♪

♪ Right from the start ♪

♪ If you wanted to ♪

♪ You could take my heart ♪

♪ How can I say ♪

♪ I want to be
with you every day? ♪

♪ Make my day ♪

♪ You drive me crazy
in a good way ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ I hope you're
here to stay ♪

- ♪ Make my day ♪
- ♪ Hey ♪

♪ You drive me crazy
in a good way ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ I hope you're
here to stay ♪

(cheering)

Thank you. Thank you.
Now, before we take a break

I'd like to introduce the band.
The tonsils you've been

looking at all night belong to
our lead singer Jessie Spano.

Y'all beautiful.
Peace. Equality.

And the boss of the bass
and backup vocals, Lisa Turtle.

- Guy: Yeah!
- Keep on rockin'.

All right. And none other
than AC Slater on the sticks.

Smooth, AC, real smooth.

And last, but certainly not least,
Screech Powers tickling the ivories.

Cock-a-doodle, dudes!

And I'm Zack Morris.
Everyone have a ball.

Hey, Kelly, what did you
think of the last song?

Oh, I'm fine.
Not hungry at all.

No, the song, Kelly.
Did you like it?

- Oh, it was great. I liked it.
- I wrote it for you.

What? I mean, thanks.
I mean, I'm thirsty.

- I'll get you some punch.
- No. I'll go get it.

Kelly, are you okay?

No, I'm not.
It is so weird.

I mean, I'm here with Zack
and he's the greatest guy,

but all I can
think about is Jeff.

Now, it's my pleasure
to announce the king and queen

of the costume ball.
The envelope, please.

Thanks, mummy.
Ha ha ha.

Drumroll!

The king and queen
of the costume ball are...

Romeo and Juliet.
Zack and Kelly.

Wherefore art they?

Kelly, you're the most
beautiful queen I've ever seen.

Thanks, Jeff.

Well, Zack, looks like I finally
get to crown you.

Get it? Ha ha ha ha.

Congratulations.

May your reign
be long and detentionless.

Hey, Kelly, let's go outside.
We need to talk.

- Should we wait for Zack?
- I don't know where he went.

Forget it.
Let's just do it.

Okay, everyone.
This is the last dance.

So find that special person
and make it good.

One... two... three.

♪ I could hardly believe it ♪

♪ When I heard
the news today ♪

♪ I had to come and get it
straight from you ♪

♪ They said you were leaving,
someone swept your heart away ♪

♪ From the look upon
your face, I see it's true ♪

♪ So tell me all about it, tell me
about the plans you're making ♪

♪ Tell me one thing
more before I go ♪

♪ How am I supposed to
live without you? ♪

I know there's something
going on between you and Jeff.

- Please, just talk to me.
- I don't know how to say this.

It's just that Jeff and I
have been working together

- and...
- Do you really like him?

No. Yes.

I don't know.
It's just all happening so fast.

Kelly, what happened?
I thought you loved me.

I do love you, Zack.

It wasn't supposed
to be this way.

Not for us.
I didn't want to hurt you

for anything in the whole world.

I thought we'd
always be together.

(tearfully)
Zack, I'm so sorry.

I'll miss you, Kelly.

Well, hey, how about
one last dance?

I'd like that.

♪ When all that I've been
living for is gone ♪

- Can we still be friends?
- Forever.

(instrumental theme music plays)