01x06 - Witch!

[bunniefuu]

Hey, meatball!

Actually, it's salami.

I know.

I was talking about you.

This is amazing!

Have you tried this?!

Sadly... no.

Brendoni!

Ugh.

Here comes the wet blanket
from the No-Fun Club.

Brendoni, you can't stay here.

You're going to ruin everything.

Just like you ruined
my last birthday party.

Fourteen years old,
fourteen skunks.

It was thoughtful!

Hold up.

Back up.

Stay where?

With us?

In my house?!

Believe me, I
don't want to stay.

But until your parents
are fooled into thinking

I care about these meatsack
Others, we're both stuck, cuz.

Cousin?

This is your cousin?

I've only read the student
exchange program handbook twice,

but I don't remember anything
about uninvited guests.

Let me check again.

It's a long story.

I need to find Morgan.

Brendoni, stay right here.

Fat chance, cuz.

I gotta take this new
vibe for a test-drive.

See you duds in the mud.

I'm outtie.

No.

No.

No way.

You need to stay right
here, and we need to...

Devon, go after Brendoni

and make sure he doesn't
get into any trouble.

Not a chance.

He stole my sandwich.

I'll get you another one.

And a drink!

Morgan, believe
me, with Brendoni,

anything that can go
wrong, will go wrong.

He's a troll.

Is he cute?

Trust me, he's not your type.

He's not anyone's type.

Astral!

You and I need to have
a little tete-a-tete.

That's French for
intense conversation.

She's smiling.

This is gonna hurt.

Hailey, we're late for class.

Oh, I think you can make some
time to look upon your demise.

We have a witch amongst us.

Explain this.

Here's flying proof.

Aha!

Speechless.

I was too when I first
saw that you're a witch.

Double double.

You're in trouble.

A witch?!

That's crazy.

Witches don't wear paisley.

I mean, I'm not a witch.

Not according to Magicpedia.

"Witches exhibit
paranormal powers

which include flying
with broomsticks..."

Well, I'm sure there
are other ways to fly.

This is nuts.

Hailey, listen to yourself.

Deny all you want, but if you
don't tell Principal Williams

you're pulling the fairy
theme from consideration

and back off Tristan,

who will be my date at
the Beach Party Dance,

this will not be pretty.

I still will be.

But this will not.

So what's it going to be?

Ladies?

Art class is starting.

Get ready to free your mind
and unleash your creativity!

Right now.

Chop chop.

Do what you have to do, but
we're not withdrawing anything.

Alright then, you're
in for a world of pain.

Byeeee!

Don't you listen to me?

If anyone finds out you're a
fairy, they will lock you up...

I know.

I know... take me away,
put needles in me,

cut me up to see what
makes me a fairy.

I get it.

And Hailey won't rest
until she takes you down.

Aunt Maddie, I warned you.

I warned you about Astral!

She's dangerous.

We've gotta get rid of her.

Hailey, how many
times have I told you

about charging into my office?

Hundreds, but this is important.

You'll want to sit down.

Well, if you were standing,
you'd want to sit down.

Either way, prepare yourself.

Hailey, is this about
the presentations...

I told you about Astral and you
said I had a vivid imagination?

Well, I don't
have an imagination.

This happened!

Hailey, any third
grader with a computer

and a special effects program
could make one of these.

But it's not special
effects, it's real!

Worry less about what
other people are doing

and more about yourself.

Like how you still
have an incomplete

in Family Studies
you have to make up.

I can't believe
you'd bring that up.

You cause one tiny expl*si*n and
they never let you forget it.

Young Other,

Are you not hungry?

Pardon me, I don't mean
to complain about food,

but do you have something
more... substantial?

I do hope you're
saving room for dessert.

Sugar pine cones, mmmm.

I'd much rather sample
some American cuisine.

How about some
Philly cheese steak?

Or some chili cheese fries?

How about some
cheesy Tex-Mex nachos?

We eat what the Earth gives us.

And today it gives us
dandelions, radishes,

and tasty pine cones.

Num num num num num num num!

Hang on, those look good!

No.

Never eat the
Brindlebox Berries.

We call them The k*ller B's.

Now enjoy your meal.

I have to go settle
an elf dispute.

They're still mad about
not having their own Realm.

Pesky.

Our Queen.

So funny.

She just wants all
the berries to herself.

The k*ller B's?

That's just an old nymphs' tale.

Have you seen anything here
that would actually hurt you?

Yes.

I was almost eaten by a giant.

I was swallowed by a troll.

A plant devoured me,
then spat me out.

Everything here tries to eat me!

Minor mishaps.

Minor?!

Here, I'll let
you in on a secret.

Those berries are pure ambrosia.

They'll fill your stomach
and delight your taste buds.

And no one will miss
a berry off that tree.

Now, off to the Elf council.

Never bring attention
to yourself.

Just stay under the radar.

Don't fly too close to the sun.

Have you ever heard of Icarus?

I'll send you a link.

Just blend in.

Yeah, yeah.

Not my jam.

Unleash the Beast!!

Sorry.

Where he's from they
don't have personal space.

Always wondered what
was so cool about these.

Hello?

I can't wait to
see you on Friday!

Uh... yeah.

That's not going to happen!

Fine, I didn't really want
to go out with you anyway!

Sorry.

Plenty of other fish
in the sea, right?

Something smells good.

Mmmm.

How many stomachs
does this kid have?

Hey!

Wait up!

Make her fall asleep for
like, one hundred years.

Or just until after prom.

I can't do that.

Only pixies do that.

Then they eat you.

Eww.

We should do what Hailey said

and let her have
her beach dance.

Uh-oh.

Oh no.

Not another
uh-oh.

It's too late.

Hailey sent a blast
out to the whole school.

I warned you.

Now everyone sees
who you really are!

There she is.

Astral the Witch!

No need to applaud,

I was happy to expose her

and stand up for superior
dance themes everywhere.

This is great.

Well, shocking was more
what I was thinking but...

Whatever you say.

I'm making a short
film this weekend.

Could you help me
with special effects?

They aren't effects!

This is real!

Astral's a witch!

Don't you get it?

Okay, okay.

Could've just said no.

Delightful.

Mmm.

Mmm.

That's a bit of alright.

My ears!!

Brendoni, where are you?

Did you do this?

Oh, no.

In kindergarten, I
didn't even finger paint.

It was too messy.

Really?

Because it's beautiful.

Brilliant.

Raw and tender at the same time.

Like a baby velociraptor.

Huh?

Whoever painted this could be

the best artist
of this generation.

But, you said you
didn't paint it, so...

Well... actually
I, uhh...

It's off to the
auction house with you.

Mama needs a new yacht!

You're not even trending...

And that's a good thing?

Yes.

No one believes it.

But you've got to keep
your powers hidden.

When your light's this
bright, you can't hide it.

Explosions are bad.

Keep them hidden.

That way Hailey won't...

keep coming after you.

Now we watch the witch melt!

Did it just get a
lot wetter in here?

Wait, you're supposed to melt.

That's just in
the movies, Hailey.

Hailey!

Astral.

In my office.

Now!

Bucket of water.

Amateur move, eh?

Yes, but that girl could be

exactly what we've
been looking for.

A witch?

You haven't seen the video
Hailey blasted yesterday?

Who has time for videos?

I was chasing Hurricane Brendoni
around all day yesterday.

Where did he end up?

Don't worry.

He followed me home, fell asleep
in a tree, woke up this morning

and said "see ya at
school, ya pile of drool."

He really is a troll.

Yeah, troll, that's a
perfect way to describe him.

I'll also take fiend,
barbarian and demon spawn.

Devon!!!

He's still my cousin.

Can you pass me the mustard?

I'm sure Brendoni will be fine.

I'm more worried about our
city's hot dog vendors.

Do you think your dad will mind
him staying with us for a while?

Sure.

How much trouble could he be?

Woooo!!

One hundred tubes!

And they said it
couldn't be done.

No one said that.

Oooh, I forgot.

Others only have one stomach.

Who's up for dessert?

Oh, this is bad.

Three years of
braces and now this?

With Brendoni on his quest,
and Astral on her Otherwalk,

Athenia seems so quiet.

I know, but
something feels amiss.

Something I can't
quite put my finger on.

My darling, it's normal for a
mother to miss her daughter.

Show yourself.

It's just me, Winston
Percival Althazar.

I'm just here
studying this plant.

I might be here a while...

I knew Others were strange, but
this one seems particularly odd.

Who turns a tuba inside out?

Brendoni!

He was definitely in
the music classroom.

What did this tuba
ever do to him?

Let's check the
principal's office.

Or the police station.

Hello Astral, I'm...

Tabitha Montgomery!

You're from "The Real
Witches Amongst Us."

I love that show.

"Because sometimes a black
cat isn't just... a black cat."

Happens all the time.

Isn't that the show that
looks for "real witches,"

but it always just
turns out to be

a bat in an attic or a
scarecrow or something?

No, Devon.

Sometimes it's a recording

of spooky children singing.

I stand corrected.

Devon, I really need
you to find Brendoni.

Please.

Okay.

But he's not staying with us.

I'm putting my
foot down, Astral.

The foot is down.

We saw your video and...

We want to make you famous.

What?!

Famous is good, right?

This isn't the kind
of fame you want.

Hey, hey, listen.

As part of Astral's entourage,

you're gonna have
to sign a waiver.

Look it, you don't
have to read it, okay?

It's all standard stuff.

Fame is wonderful.

Free cars, money,
sparkly jewelry...

Sparkly?

Tell me more about
this... sparkly.

Wait, Astral...

And in conclusion...

Pi r squared, and might
I add, also delicious.

You know, I was going to quit my
job today and chase my dream

of becoming a hand model
but, since you walked in,

I've changed my mind.

Thank you, Brendoni.

Alright, everybody,
get outta here.

Same time tomorrow, Brendoni?

I'll check my schedule.

What are you doing in here?

And how did you get
Mr. Stockley to smile?

Well, when you got it, you
got it, and you do not got it.

Actually, you're
kinda cramping my zen.

Your zen?

Do you know how many
zens of other people

you've cramped today?

Now you're starting to annoy me.

Annoy you?!

I've spent all of my
time looking for you.

And Astral's worried.

Maybe you should get out

before I throw you
out of a window.

Throw me out of a window?!

You are rude, a slob,
have no respect for others

and it might not be a bad idea

to tie an air freshener,
or twelve, around your neck.

You just, you can't...

I can't what?

Uh...

You can't...

You can't treat people this way.

Dude?

Bump it.

Isn't that what you do here?

Yeah.

Okay.

But I'm serious about all
the stuff that I said.

I'll take it down
from an eleven to a ten.

Ten and a half.

I'll try.

That's all I'm asking.

And maybe you can repay
me for the food I had to...

Don't push it.

Right.

Wait, how long are you staying?

People are starting to show up.

I'm getting butterflies in my
stomach and not like the time

when I accidentally
swallow a caterpillar.

That tickled.

Don't worry, you're
gonna do great.

America is gonna love you.

Or mock you.

Savagely.

Okay great, we're
on in five minutes.

Astral, you can't do this.

Morgan!

Where have you been?

I'm serious.

You can't show your
powers to everyone.

There are lots of
cameras here, right?

Right.

But not like Hailey's phone.

Like, TV cameras.

Then it's perfect.

No, you don't understand.

Everyone will know
what you are...

Umm, hi.

Sorry, you can't be here.

The talent needs to prep, okay?

Let's go, come on.

She's not the talent,
she's my friend.

Get her out of here.

Go on.

This way, this way.

Astral!

Don't do it!

You're gonna do great,
gonna do great.

Come on.

I can't believe
you're allowing this.

The school's going
to be on television.

Plus the show donated
a thousand dollars.

So the teacher's lounge just
got that fancy espresso machine

we needed, for
educational purposes.

Besides, you wanted to
prove Astral's a witch?

I wanted her to get
outed, not become famous!

If anyone should have a
reality show, it should be me.

Hailey's Comet... about
my meteoric rise

to the top of the
high school food chain.

Three, two, one, you're live.

Our ongoing journey to uncover
"The Real Witches Amongst Us"

has led us here.

Theseus High School.

A hotbed for dark magic
that fills this world.

Don't do it.

Astral.

A bewitching name for
a bewitching girl.

My parents named me
after a peacock they know.

We've all seen the famous video

of you turning red and
floating in mid air.

It was kind of embarrassing.

It was kind of magical.

Today we will have you duplicate
that moment right here, live,

so we can truly see
the magic you possess.

Ladies and Gentleman, I give
you the witch of Theseus High.

Okay.

Here it goes.

Ta-da!

What are you doing?

I'm doing magic.

You add special
effects later, right?

Just like before?

Cut.

No, no, no.

Tabitha, it's fine, it's fine.

We'll cut it all together,

add in spooky music
of children singing.

It'll be great, don't worry.

No?

No, okay.

I don't understand.

Hailey, you're smart.

Often misguided.

But smart.

Focus on what's important
and you'll be okay.

After the two weeks detention

you'll serve for
causing all this mayhem.

You planned that the
whole time, didn't you?

Morgan, if we're
going to be friends,

you're gonna have
to learn to trust me.

And so I give the gnomes a home,

and they still spend all their
time hanging out on the lawn!

When are they going to learn
how to ditch a stereotype?

I did it, I'm sorry,
I ate the berries!

I don't want to be
a donkey anymore.

You ate the brindlebox berries?

I was so hungry and I didn't
want dandelions and grass,

but they sound oddly
delicious right now.

I say let him stay
a donkey forever.

Oh, please, no!

You have no idea
how this fur itches.

And pulling carts is so
bad for one's posture.

I think our young Winston
has learned a valuable lesson.

Oh yes.

Yes, whatever you say goes.

Oh, she knows that already.

She's a queen.

Right...

But... but...
my ears!

My teeth!

My tail!

I've reversed the spell.

You'll eventually
return to normal

when you prove yourself worthy.

In the meantime, I suggest
you think about your time here

and what to do with it.

I will!

I will.

I prom-HE-HAW-ise.

Others say that every
cloud has a silver lining.

Sometimes, something that
seems like a disaster...

Oh I think you can make time
to look upon your demise.

You're a witch.

Double double,
you're in trouble.

Could turn into a
great opportunity.

Our ongoing journey to uncover
"The Real Witches Amongst Us"

has led us here.

Ta-da!

You planned that the
whole time, didn't you?

Or something that
seems annoying...

Troll, that's a perfect
way to describe him!

Do you think your dad will mind

him staying with us for a while?

...could turn into
the best thing ever.

Bump it!

Okay.

I guess sometimes, all you
need is a new perspective.

So your parents just
sent you over here?

They thought I could
learn about, uh...

Different cultures.

Yeah, them.

Dad, it's cool.

He can room with me.

Well I'll have to call the
student exchange program

and make sure this checks out.

Cool, cool.

Thanks, Dad.

Thanks, Mr.
Quince!

Hey, we've got a blow-up
mattress you can sleep on

until we get something
more permanent.

No need.

As long as I can find some
branches, leaves and feathers,

I can make a k*ller
sleeping nest.

It's a natural remedy...

for his back..

Yeah, what she said.

Okay.

Hey, you think you can show me

how you turned that
tuba inside out?

Yeah.

No prob,
D-Man.

Goodnight, guys.

Versitude!?

How dare you put Athenia and
the Second Kingdom in danger.

Going on TV, what
were you thinking?

It wasn't my fault.

And I fixed it.

You are reckless.

Your parents have enough
trouble with that boy

who turned into a
donkey without worrying

about you endangering
our entire Kingdom.

I'm so sorry.

It won't happen again.

Empty promises.

Like so much
that's in your mind.

Know this...

Your parents may be forgiving
but if this happens again,

I will make sure that your time

in the Other's world
ends immediately.

Oh, and that Tristan
boy and your friends...

I'll snuff them
out like a candle.

♪