03x19 - Chapter Sixty-Three

Episode transcripts for the 2014 TV show "Jane The Virgin". Aired October 2014 - July 2019.*
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"Jane The Virgin" revolves around a devout young Latina woman, who must decide what to do after her doctor's error causes her to be artificially inseminated. Based on the Venezuelan telenova Juana La Virgen.
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03x19 - Chapter Sixty-Three

Post by bunniefuu »

Welcome back, friends.

You'll recall we last left our Jane,

yup, having a fling

with the very sexy Fabian.

And, yes, it's that Fabian,

as in Rogelio's costar in
Los Viajes De Guillermo.

Onscreen, he plays his rival.

His teeny-tiny rival.

But you know what wasn't tiny?

Rogelio's happiness.

Because he finally got
engaged to Xiomara, again!


And they had decided on a wedding

to match their love.

Go crazy.

And speaking of big love,

Rafael was feeling it for Petra,

- and so he told her.
- I want to be with you.

But Petra, well, she just wasn't sure.

I know, buzz-k*ll, right?

And then they were
interrupted by the cops,


who said they knew who k*lled Scott,
and it was...


Actually, you'll find
that out soon enough.


One last bit of backstory on Rafael.

Sure, he's rich, but
things haven't always


been easy for him.

A long time ago, he had cancer.

And remember his sister Luisa?

Well, she was dating Rose,

aka the crime lord Sin Rostro.

Though in public, Rose wore a mask,
and looked like this.


I know! Straight out
of a Telenovela, right?


Which, of course, this is, after all.

Once upon a time,
there was a little girl


who believed in once upon a time.

"And the glass slipper fit
Cinderella's foot perfectly."

That's right.

From a young age,
Jane Gloriana Villanueva believed


in the magic of fairy tales.

"And so they got married and lived..."

Happily ever after.

The end.

But as time went on,

Jane exchanged that for a more...
realistic perspective.


- "And so they got married and lived..."

uh, together as husband and wife.

Uh, and they had their ups and downs,

and they faced difficult times

where their relationship was tested,

but they stuck through it,

because they knew that
relationships take work

and, you know,
life doesn't always work out perfectly.

The end.

Oh, and the princess had
her own fulfilling career

outside the monarchy.

The Cinderella we're doing at
school has a different ending.

Well,
there can be lots of different endings,

that's what makes the story so great.

So, yeah. By now, Jane was over
the whole fairy tale thing.


Okay, I'm ready.

Hit me with the wedding deets.

The theme is a fairy tale come to life.

Yeah,
apparently Rogelio didn't get the memo.


Oh, wow, look at that.

Doves, sure.

Ha. Fireworks.

A carriage pulled by white horses.

And this is what you want?

Because it's your day, too.

The white horses happened
to be your mother's idea.

I always thought I was too old,

that I missed out on the
whole princess window,

but your dad convinced me

it's not too late,

and I started to think
about how fun it would be

to wear the whole, big
poofy dress, and...

Unless you think I'll look silly.

I-I don't want to look silly.

I don't think you'll look silly.

I think you'll look beautiful.

Okay.

So, I'd like to ask you,

officially,

will you be my maid of honor?

Yes, of course. I would
officially love to.

And I am ready to take care
of your every bridal need.

Oh, wow.

That's a...
you're, are you, you're wearing a tiara?

No, this is for you.

I'm wearing a crown.


A yacht, too.

Wow.

And all this is happening in two weeks.

Has to. We are all slaves

to the television schedule.

That's when my show goes on break.

But we already hired, uh, Jean Luc,

the best wedding planner around.

He has secured vendors,

fireworks, Malaysian doves...


Here we go...


Well...

He created me, so, a very big role.


Ah. Ideally, Ricky Martin.


Mom...


We're not getting married
in a church by a priest.


Okay, you know what, Abuela?

In my official capacity
as maid of honor,

I'll remind you: it's their day.

Ooh, burn!

No, it wasn't

a burn.

I love you, Alba, but I have to go.

It is my last night sh**t
until after the wedding,

and it is m*rder on my skin.

Milady.

Until we meet again.

Ah, yes, Fabian.

To catch you up: Once upon a time,

Jane had the most perfect fling ever.

Amazing sex with absolutely
no strings attached.


She and Fabian

were on exactly the same page,

making things easy and uncomplicated.

So, yeah. I'm just messing with you.

I mean, the sex was good,
don't get me wrong.


But then...

- So, I should really go.

No.

Just five more minutes.

Uh... you said that already.

I know.

But time goes too fast with you.

Two more minutes?

Boop.

Fabian obviously still wants
some kind of relationship.

So are you gonna end it with him?

Yeah. I have to.


Oh, but a part of me is just hoping

that he'll take a hint and fade away.


Ooh. Yeah, he's not gonna take the hint.

I know. I have to tell him.

Yeah, well, do it soon.

It's a little selfish
to not let someone know

where you're at, emotionally.

Petra still hasn't given you an answer?

No. She says she's
still thinking it over.

But, I mean, how much longer?
It's been a week.

That sucks. But it is
a really big decision.

I know. And I respect that.

But if she brings it up, could you just

tell her you think it's a good idea?

- What?
- You know, I just...

If she brings it up at brunch or...

I really don't want to
get in the middle of this.

Mateo, hurry up, we got to go.

No, you're right, totally.

You... you should stay out of it.

Which brings us here, now...

I just can't decide.

To their most awkward brunch

in their three years of brunches.

Well, by all means,
please, take your time.

Well, I'm trying to decide.
It's not like I'm not trying to.

Here, have a pancake.
Last week you had eggs.

Do you think they're really
talking about breakfast?


Okay, everybody with sticky hands,
stand up...

We're washing.

Mine are the stickiest.

Oh, come on, Mateo!

I got him.

Talk to her.

Can we talk?

Oh, um, yeah, sure. About?

Oh, stop it, I know he told you
about his big... declaration.

So what do you think about all this?

I think it's between you two.

That's ridiculous.
You always have an opinion.

This is the one time I actually want it.

I'm staying out of it.

No matter how nicely you ask.

I have no opinion.

Of course I have an opinion.

It's a horrible idea.

Actually, that's not even an opinion,

it's just a fact.

They're terrible
together. Volatile, mean.

And now there are kids involved.
And two families.

Who are in really good places.


Nope.

Not my place.


That must be Jean Luc.

Ah yes, the famed wedding planner.

Oh, hi.

I didn't realize that
there were two of you.

My parents will be here any minute,

they're just stuck in traffic.

So... how long

have you two been planning
weddings together?

Ugh.

Eight years.

Oh, wow.

Well, I can tell you a
little about what they want.

I'm sure you heard
that they're going for

- the full fairy tale.
- Ugh.

- Hate it.
- What?

Your mother can't do fairy tale.

- She's too old.
- I have to agree.

And we never agree.

Well, I don't agree.

And, more importantly,
she doesn't agree.

It's what she wants.

She'll look, uh,
ridiculous in a poofy dress.

Totally, uh, ridiculous.

Well, you're entitled to your opinion,

of course, but I'd really rather

you not say that in front of my mom.

Of course we'll say it,
that's what we're being paid for.

She has her heart set on this.

We'll have our names on it.

I don't care!

Look, they're here. My mom

wants a full fairy tale wedding,
and neither of you

are gonna make her feel bad about that.
Got it?

- Got it.
- Understood.

Oh, wait, what?
Wait, where-where are you going?

We cannot work like this.

I have to agree. And we

never agree.

Oh, hi, hello, sorry we're late.

- What'd we miss?
- Oh, we quit.

Creative differences?
What didn't they like?

Your age.

I don't know. I'm-I'm sorry.

It was my fault. I was pushy.

- No, it's fine.
- Totally fine.

Just the wedding is so soon.

Yeah, and Jean Luc had
great deals with vendors.

So... it's not fine?

We'll hire someone else.
Who cares what it costs?

No, we have to stay in our budget.
It's already huge.

Maybe we can plan it ourselves.

I can't plan a wedding
with my sh**ting schedule.

Rogelio...

This is not the time for budgets!

I'll do it.

I'm done with my novel.

I have time. Plus, you already
know the vendors you want

to use, it's just a matter of
organizing and negotiating,

which I can do.

Let me do this for you.

As your maid of honor.

Okay, if you insist.

I am entrusting this to you.

Hey, Krishna,
can you add karate pick-up for me

- at : ?
- You'll be cutting it close,

you've got your appointment
with Dr. Osmani.

Uh, just reschedule that.

Your oncologist? You can't reschedule.

It's just my annual screening.

I know, and you can't push it.

Just tell the doctor I'll be late.

Great.

Oh, and your sister called.

What? Why didn't you tell me?

She said she'd call
you back at : sharp.

Go, run, run!

I know what you're thinking:

run where? What's going on?

Well, remember this?

We just got the composite
sketch of the woman

Chuck Chesser saw on the beach
the night of Scott's m*rder.

Here's what you didn't see.

Chuck Chesser clearly described
your sister's girlfriend.

Eileen?

She k*lled Scott?

It must be connected to Rose.

I knew my sister was
still involved with her.

Luisa,

hi.

Rafael, hey!

Uh, it's-it's good to hear from you.

Um, I... You know, I've
been trying to get in touch.

I know. I got your message.

We haven't had great reception.

We're in the desert.


Yeah. No, no, no, I-I... get it.

Um, but, uh, look, I called because,

you know,
we still need to have that board meeting

and, you know, you
just... you just ran off.

I know, I'm really sorry,

but we'll come back soon, okay?

Well, how soon? Uh, I can't... You know,

I can't plan a meeting
without a firm date.

I'll let you know, but right now

- I have to go.
- No.

- Uh, wait.
- I have to.

The camels are here,
the tour is starting.

Wait.

No, uh, just... I just want to know...
why'd you leave?

It was so sudden. Did
I-did I do something?

Of course not.

We'll catch up later, okay?

Sorry.

But it's... it's hard.

You know that I want to have

a better relationship with him.

And you know that we have to make sure

he's not working with the cops.

He's not.

Trust me, I know my brother.

Were you able to trace it?

No.

Hopefully she comes back to town soon.

We can't go back anytime soon.

Come on.

We can go anywhere else

in the world. Hmm?

I'll even put on that
uncomfortable mask.

I booked your makeup and hair

and I got the caterers
to go down $ a head

as long as Dad moves
off that whole thing

about all the desserts being lavender.

Brr... Oh, and one thing: the horses.
For the carriage.

It's short notice and it turns
out white horses are really

hard to come by. I
found a speckled horse

that's... Oh...

You're disappointed?

I know it's dumb,

but I-I've always pictured white horses.

It's absolutely not dumb.

I will find you white horses.

Thank you. White will just pop more,

- you know?
- Oh, it sure will.

Oh, that better not be Jean and Luc

trying to get their job back,

because I am k*lling it on my own.

Hi. So I need to talk to you
about this Rafael situation.

Petra, look...

And I don't care if you don't
want to be in the middle. I need

to talk this over with someone
and you're my only real friend.

So I don't know what to do. I mean,

according to your mom's bridal magazine,
we're doomed.

"Do you bring out the
best in each other?"

No, definitely not.

Ah, yes. To recap

Petra and Rafael's fairy tale...

I mean,
it took so long to get over him, Jane.

I know.

And now he wants to
open all that up again?

How is that fair?

Plus, we were terrible together.

Is he forgetting that?

And now we have this good relationship.

And these two great, happy kids.

When I think about messing all that up,

I mean, it just...

doesn't seem worth it.

Right?

What do you think?

I think...

that makes a lot of sense.

It is absolutely worth it.

No, it's not.

The cakes aren't gonna be lavender,
get over it.

We have to move quickly,
you're getting married so soon.

Now listen, I want to go over some st...

Oh. Aw, sh**t.

Why are you avoiding Fabian?

I have to end it and
I'm kind of dreading it.

I know, I know, I'll do it.

What, why are you staring at me?

Just... are you % sure you
want to break up with him?

Yes.

What did you do?

I dropped off an
invitation to the wedding.

What? Why?

I thought it was going great

and you'd want to bring him.

Oh... Ooh.

- Okay, well, has he seen it yet?
- No.

I-I put it in his dressing room.
And we're about to sh**t.

Ah!

Jane?

- What...
- Hi.

Hi. I was just grabbing my phone.

You're probably wondering
why I'm in here.

Well, I assume it's to make love.

Let's do it, they'll wait on set.

Oh, no, no, you can keep your shirt on.

I'm not here for that.

Well-well, then why are you here?

And that's when she saw it.

Oh, yes, my last show.

Thanks to the trainer I became a
very good rider. I love horsies.

And, friends, it felt like

one of those twists of fate

you only find in fairy tales.

Or telenovelas.

And do you still know
the horsie trainer?

Oh yes, we go riding
at least once a month.

Wow. Because, as it happens,

I am in the market to
rent some white horses

just like that one.

That's great.
My friend will help you out for sure.

Oh, thank you.

Of course. Anything for my special lady.

So, why are you here again?

And at that moment,
our heroine weighed her options.


To give you this invitation
to my parents' wedding.

You want me to go with you?

I sure do.

Oh, I'd love to.

Yay! I'm so glad!

Of course I feel guilty using Fabian

and his equine connections.

But it's for a good cause.

It's not every day that
my parents get married.

True. This is only

their second marriage
and third engagement.


In fact, I'm pretty sure
that if Fabian understood

how much it means to me to give
my parents the perfect wedding,

he wouldn't even mind.

Okay, fine, he'd be pissed.

But it's not like I'm gonna
keep having sex with him.

I'm not totally lying.

He wants more

a-and I'm open to more if...

He has a personality transplant.

We have a great time at the wedding.

Mm-hmm.

Be careful with the frown face.

You are too young to get lines.

What's bringing you down?

I just got some pretty
heartbreaking news.

His shirtless scene was cut.

Jane told you, huh?

Uh-oh.

I get it.

Breakups are hard.

But there are other
fish in the sea, and...

with a chest as powerful
as Poseidon himself,

you can catch any of them.

So Jane told you she was
going to break up with me?

Of course, we're very close.

Plus, I am great at keeping secrets.

Okay, so in this next sh*t,
Rogelio climbs the vine

to get to the top of the table.
Then we push in

on Fabian, and your wheels are turning.

Sort of like this.

Got it?

Yeah. I got it.

Perfect.

And action.

Rafael.

Can we talk?

You're ready?

Yes.

Sorry. I-It was just a lot.

And, um, surprising.

I know.

But listen, now that I've processed,

I've decided.

I don't want us to go there.

What?

We tried.

It didn't work.

Are you saying you don't
have feelings for me?

I'm saying that what
we have now is good.

With us, with the kids.

I-If it doesn't work...

But if it does...

- we could be happy.
- We're happy now.

Sure have a funny way of showing it.

- Petra...
- Stop.

I thought about it a lot,

I-I talked it over with a friend.

This is better.

For all of us.

It's not as romantic as Ricky Martin,

but we have to have a backup plan.

Oprah?

- Dad.
- Okay, Gayle.

I found this Unitarian minister.

She seems really great.

Mom wants to meet her today.

What time can you do?

- : .
- Okay, I'll schedule it.

Don't be late, though.

Jane. I'll be there at : .

I know how important it is.

This scene won't take long to sh**t.

So, rehearsals

are just running a few minutes long.

They'll be right out, and the kids

are very excited about
tomorrow's performances.

What did you say to Petra?

Uh, what?

Oh, please. She said
she talked to a friend.

It was clearly you.

What happened to staying out of it?

She just showed up at my
house asking for advice.

- So you sabotaged me?
- I didn't sabotage anything.

I hardly talked. I just
sat there listening

to all the reasons why she
thought it wasn't a good idea.

You were supposed

to tell her all the reasons
why you thought that it was.

But I don't think it is.

Well, that's your opinion.

Exactly. And you were the one
who asked me to get involved.

Hi, Krishna.

I have your oncologist on the
line with your test results.

Okay. Um, put her through.

I forgot my line.

No problem, let's just go again.

Okay.

And, action.

I forgot again. I feel so stupid.

You say "got it."

That's the whole line.

Got it.

Hey, I just said the line.

Can we sh**t now, please?

Um, I'm feeling a little shiny.

Can I get a touch-up?

What are you doing?

You and I both know you never get shiny

because you have perfect skin.

I demand to know what's going on.

What's going on is that
your treacherous daughter

is using me for my horsies.

- What are you talking about?
- She didn't break up with me,

but thanks to you I know
that she was going to.

So let's just say,
it's gonna take me a while

to remember the lines.

And you might not make it
to your : appointment.

Which brings us here, now.

Uh-oh. Apparently, Fabian's

just led Jane on a wild goose chase.

With nary a golden egg in sight.

What do you mean, Dad never showed up?

Apparently, Fabian kept intentionally

screwing up his lines so
Rogelio couldn't leave.

Oh, no. This is my fault.

I-I tried to use Fabian for his horses

and now he's taking it out on Dad.

A tale as old as time.

I am so sorry, Ma.

Don't feel bad.

I'm just stressed and overwhelmed

with all this wedding planning.

I'm actually thinking

maybe we should just skip
the stag party tomorrow.

What? No. No way.

The whole thing is my fault
and I'm going to fix it.

And there's nothing that
you can do or anything.

I just... I wanted you to know

that I just got some bad news

from my doctor... my annual.


Anyway, I guess,

my cancer is back.

So...

call me, okay?

Let's hope she falls for it.

I mean...

I did for a minute.

I have to go see him.

It's not a good time.

To have cancer?

I'm going.

Are you coming with me or not?

Sorry. Allergies.

You don't have allergies.

Yes, I do. I am allergic
to terrible acting

and there's a lot of it
in the air right now.

- Don't.
- Cut. Guys, come on.

We've got a lot to sh**t today.

Let's reset and go again.

- Jane.
- Jane.

Hi.

Fabian, can we talk?

Talk.

Um, look.

I'm sorry.

It was wrong of me to
try to use you like that.

But don't blame my dad for what
happened between us, blame me.

Oh, I do blame you. I
blame you completely.

You're a heartless slut and
I wish I'd never met you.

Did he just call her a slut?

Did you just call her a slut?

Did you just call me a slut?

Don't you dare

talk to my daughter that way!

Well, you should have
never brought your daughter

to the set in the first place.

Tempting me with her goji berries.

Jane is always welcome on set.

And she can bring any
type of berries she wants.

Well, I refuse to continue
sh**ting as long as she's here.

I am Rogelio De la Vega!

You do not want to make
an enemy out of me!

Dad. Please, both of you,

just stop, just calm down.

I will not calm down!

We will fight.

My dad is not going to fight you.

Oh, we're fighting.

Crew lunch in the parking lot.

That's lunch.

- No hitting in the face.
- Obviously.

- Or the hair.
- Of course.

Everything else is fair game.

I feel like I'm in Jurassic
Park about to fight a dinosaur.

When I knock you on your ass

I hope your butt implants don't explode.

That was a necessary procedure

to cushion my weak tailbone.

Both of you stop this right now.

You're being ridiculous.

Whoa! Stop this right now!

What are you doing here?
I'm trying to defend your honor.

I don't need you to defend my honor,
please, Dad.

Just calm down, I'll handle this.

Listen to me.

I'm sorry about the way
that I handled things.

I know I hurt you.

- I clearly meant nothing to you.
- Less than nothing.

- Dad.
- Coward.

That is not true.

I've only slept with one
other man in my whole life.

You're the first person
that I slept with

since my husband d*ed.

And trust me, that does mean something.

So please don't fight with my father.

Ah.

No hard feelings?

For the sake of my daughter,
I will let bygones be bygones.

Aw. Jane the peacemaker.

Dad!

Whoa. Looks like Jane's

boxing training with
Dennis really paid off.


My nose! I think you broke it!

My God. I am so sorry.

Uh, it was just instinct.

You were gonna punch my dad.

In the face.

That's it. I'm done.
I-I can't work with him.

I can't work with him either.

- It's him or me.
- It's him or me.

Girls, come on, hurry up.

We don't want to be late
for your performance... Oh.

When did you get here?

Uh, just now.

Oh.

Are you okay?

Yep, fine.

No. I'm not fine.

You know what?
I don't care if I turned you down.

We're still family and
you still have to tell me.

What are you talking about?

I heard you on the phone

telling someone your cancer's back.

What? No.

No. That was just to get Luisa
and Eileen back to Miami.

Wh-what?

I'm working with the police, okay?

I just left her the message. I'm fine.

Oh, thank God.

I'm fine.

Girls, come. The stage awaits.

Yay. My shoe fits perfectly.

Let's hug.

And they lived happily ever after.

And they all got good jobs.

The end.

Oh. Good job, buddy.

Girls!

- Daddy.
- That was amazing.

Oh. I'm so proud of you.

Hey, buddy, you were amazing.

You did so great!

Thanks. Can I get a cookie?

Yes, you can.

Go on.

So, um, I'm sorry.

About earlier. You were right.

If I ask you to get involved,

then I have to accept your opinion.

Even if I don't like it.

Thanks.

The world does not revolve around you.

- _
- Grown men fist fighting?

You think I like babysitting?

Now, you are going to make up
what you didn't get yesterday,

or there will be consequences.

Understand?

Are you on your way?

What?

I'm so sorry. I just can't leave now.

It's our bachelor-bachelorette.

- The bosses are here.
- What?!

- It's not my fault.
- It never is.

- Okay, that's not fair.
- I agree.

You've missed every single appointment,

and I'm having to do
everything by myself!

So hire a wedding planner.

I don't want a wedding planner!

I wanted to plan it with you.

Rogelio, we need you.

I'm sorry, Xo, about all of this,

but I'm at work. I have to go.

We'll talk later, okay?

Have a good sh**t.

Hey, hey, hey, who's ready to party?

I cancelled it.

- What?
- I just texted everyone.

Your dad's working, and...

I don't know... I-I'm
just not up for it.

And I know you're disappointed.

Yeah, but it's... it's your night.

Honestly, I'm really
not up for it, either.

- What's going on?
- Ugh.

Please? It'll take my mind off things.

Can we at least have a sh*t first?

Oh, perfect.

Ooh!

So I'm standing there,

watching Raf go to Petra, and...

I just had this feeling, like...

I felt...

Jealous?

No. No, no, no, it was...
it was not jealous.

I-I mean, it's not romantic.

But maybe...

jealous of what they
would have as a family.

Yeah. I understand that.

Plus, you're so used to being
in the middle of everything.

What?

Like in our family,
in your relationships,

you've always been right in the center.

The heroine, as it were.

It's hard being on the outside.

I need another drink.

Hey. Whoa.

Just tell me the truth.

Why did Jean Luc quit?

Creative differences.

What does that mean?!

Tell me!

Okay, fine!

They rained on your fairy tale parade.

Oh, no!

- I knew it. It's stupid.
- No way.

They're stupid.

No, they're experts.

Not in what you and Dad have.

After all you went through,

finding your way back,

you deserve your fairy tale ending.

You do, too.

I had it.

And you'll have it again.

I hope so.

I'd like to.

Aw.

What?

You said you want to...

Ma... stop crying.

I can't. I just

feel so lucky that I gave
birth to my best friend.

Aw!

Oh, wow. They're really wasted.

Huh?

Ah...

Hi, there. I'm Prince Charming.

Apparently, there's a naughty

little princess around here.

Oh, my God, I forgot

- to cancel the stripper.
- Wait. No!

We cancelled. The party's off.

- Is he...?
- The same one

- that you hired for me, yes.
- He's the only stripper I knew!

He's really good!

All right.

What the hell. I'm in!

Oh, my God.

- Wow.
- Wow.

Did he forget something?

Ma.

What are you doing here?

I left set after I got Jane's text.

What text?

I'm sorry.
I just wanted him to prioritize you

because you deserve to
be prioritized, Mom!

- Are you drunk?
- Yeah, very.

- Huh.
- But, Rogelio, what about work?

I'll deal with the consequences.

Jane's right.

You're more important,
and I have to show it to you

right this minute.

Now come. Your carriage awaits!

Oh. Go. Have fun.

Oh. You weren't kidding.

I'm sorry about the miniature horses.

Apparently, full-size white horses

- are hard to come by these days.
- Yeah, I heard.

And just then...

It's Ricky Martin.

He can officiate our wedding!

Oh!

Oh, wow!

Things are working out so well.

For them.

Mirror, mirror, on the wall,

who's the drunkest one of all?

So, I'm a terrible person.

And why is that?

I think I did sabotage you and Petra.

Because if I'm being honest...

Which I should be, because Pinocchio...

I wasn't afraid of what would happen if

you and Petra didn't work out.

I was afraid of what
would happen if you did.

Because then, Mateo and I would be

on the outside of
everything in your life.

We'd be like the extra people.

Which is a terrible reason not
to support what you wanted,

so...

I'm sorry.

Well, first...

thank you.

You're welcome.

And how drunk are you?

- I'm so drunk.
- Got it.

Well, hopefully, you'll remember this,

because I need you to know

that you and Mateo will never
be on the outside of anything.

No, but it's okay.

It can't happen.

It won't happen.

Jane, when I think about

family... you're who I see.

Thank you for that.

I love you.

So much.

And friends, that's when it happened.

In a twist of fate,
or timing or storytelling...


Oh. Can you hold on?

Hi.

So, I need you to talk me down.

Wha-What's going on?

I thought Rafael was sick.

He's not.

But it made me think about losing him,

which made me think about him,

which made all these feelings come up,

and I-I just need you to talk me down.

You know, remind me why Rafael
and I should not be together.

And so, of course, Jane said...

No. I was wrong.

You should go for it.

- What? Why?
- Because...

what if it works?

Can you hold on for a second?

I'm gonna fix things.

What things?

The thing is,

Rafael is different now, and so are you.

And you two have a family together,

so you know what's at stake.

And that doesn't have to be a bad thing.

It could be a really good thing.

I-I mean, take-take my parents.

They were a disaster the first time,

and now they're so great.

I'm just...

scared, Jane.

Because of your feelings,

which is good. Hold on.

- Go see Petra.
- What?

Why?

If you want to be with her, go... now.

And I get it.

It-it's scary

to have feelings again for someone,

but when it comes to love,
there's always a risk.

And there's always a chance
that you'll get hurt.

But the possibility of it working out...

That's so worth it.

- Are you drunk?
- Yes!

But it's still true.

Can you hang on?

Are you there yet?

Yes, I'm here.

What are you doing here?

We were thinking.

And Ricky Martin is great and all.

But we want someone
else standing between us

and officiating our wedding ceremony.

Someone who's been right at
the center of our relationship.

Someone who's even closer
to God than Ricky Martin.

Will you marry us, Jane?

I'd love to.

And what do I want to
say friends, except...


they all lived happily ever after.

But alas, before we get to ever after,

before we have our love and laughter...

we have to catch our villain, don't we?

'Cause with her out
there, no one's free.


This damn shoe doesn't fit.
I should return it to the mall.

Police!

Don't move. Hands

behind your back.

No!

- No. No.
- No!

Stop! No!

Otherwise known as...

the most wicked stepmother of them all.

No! No! No!
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