02x03 - Don't Mess With Texas

Episode transcripts for the TV show "sh**t". Aired: November 2016 to September 2018.*
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"sh**t" follows a highly-decorated veteran who is coaxed back into action to prevent a plot to k*ll the President. Based on the "Point of Impact" novel.
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02x03 - Don't Mess With Texas

Post by bunniefuu »

- Previously on "sh**t"...
- Hey, Cap, you got to see this.


- Who did the dr*gs belong to?
- Meachum.

Hugh Meachum?
CIA?

She's coming with us.

- [g*ns f*ring, people screaming]
- Time to move! Time to move!

- Follow me! Follow me!
- Let's go! Stay low! Stay low!

- [g*nsh*t, expl*si*n]
- [screams]

I don't want to feel like
I'm trapped here.

- I want to go home.
- I get it. I get it.

- I'm sorry.
- Don't let me see you again.

Yeah?

- We got to get out of here now.
- [g*ns f*ring]

Lin, Lin...

I came here on a valid passport.

- You had no right to stop me.
- Why is there an Interpol

Orange Notice indicating you are
a thr*at to national security?

Patricia Gregson.

Heinrichs, Federal Police.

Does the name Golden Crescent
mean anything to you?

Golden Crescent,
an Arab crime syndicate.

You need to clean out
the warehouse immediately.

I'm calling to speak
with Officer Franz Heinrichs.

He was k*lled in the line
of duty last week, ma'am.


This wasn't terrorism. It was m*rder.

We're being hunted.

[birds chirping]

[dark ambient music]

♪ ♪

[indistinct chatter on TV]

[frying pans sizzling]

♪ ♪

[man continues speaking
indistinctly on TV]


- [neck snaps]
- [breathing heavily]

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

I know what Kevin and Edgar
meant to you.


Yeah, I thought the days of
losing my brothers were over.

Just wish I knew what happened.

What do you mean?
I thought it was t*rrorists.

They had some help.

But, Jules, I need you to know

that there's no place
safer for you and Mary

than right where we are now.

I promise.

[dark ambient music]

[door opens]

Isaac...

I'm guessing you're here
about Frankfurt?

They k*lled my wife.

[door closes]

Give me some weapons,
point me in a direction,

and I'll do whatever you need me to do.

I already gave you that chance.

The real problem
is about to reveal itself.

You have other people for that.

You refused.

A year ago, you could've put
a stop to this heroin business.

Now I got a well-respected newspaper

getting very close
to revealing the truth.

You didn't tell me the whole story?

- Isaac...
- You didn't say they'd k*ll my wife!

And you should know that
when I ask for something,

it's very important.

Because you always see what's
coming down the line, right?

Your being here...

has become a problem for me.

I've scrubbed your identity.

Isaac Johnson hasn't even gotten
a parking ticket.

Do what you have to do.

Just don't make the mistake
of speaking my name ever again.

♪ ♪

[indistinct chatter, telephones ringing]

♪ ♪

_

[gasps softly]

[sighs] Son of a...

♪ ♪

[scoffs]

So the, uh, senator noticed the effort,

and he offered me his box seats
to the ballet this Friday.

I thought maybe we could go.

[sighs]

What's the matter?
You don't like the ballet?

Sorry.
[scoffs] It's work.

I've barely seen Patricia
since she hired me.

I'm not exactly sure how my job works.

What is the, uh, issue?

I discovered something in Frankfurt,

and I know Patricia knows,

but she hasn't asked me about it.

Welcome to DC.
Plausible deniability.

- It should be the city's motto.
- True.

But... Patricia always sees
seven steps ahead.

She knows I wouldn't
just go to Frankfurt,

put Swagger on a plane, and come home.

Every evaluation I've ever had
says I paint outside the lines,

and she hired me anyway.

So what are you gonna do?

My job.

[dark ambient music]

♪ ♪

[cell phone ringing, vibrating]

♪ ♪

[cell phone beeps]

Yes?

We need to meet.

♪ ♪

The correct term is ambush.

If I wanted to ambush you,
I wouldn't call first.


Don't make me find you, please.

I'll text you the address.

♪ ♪

[beeps]

[flushes]

♪ ♪

How soon can you meet me?

Which one...
the pink one with the hearts

or the blue one with the polka dots?

Well, I think the pink one
with the hearts.

What do you think, Estella?

Oh, sí, mi amor.

The one with the hearts
goes perfectly with her shoes.

- I think so, too.
- [door closes]

- [chuckles]
- What a beautiful doll.

Isn't she pretty, Daddy?

She's cute, but she's no kitten mouse.

[giggles]

Baby, I got to run into town
and pick up the horse feed

- before Joey kills me.
- Why? Did he call?

[sighs] You know how he gets.

But I'll be back real soon.

- All right, be careful.
- Always.

[horn honking]

So much for fading into the background.

This is Texas, Gunny.

Anything else would look suspicious.

Yeah, but that cup you're swigging on,

that blends right in.

Yeah, I'm experimenting
with a new roasting technique.

Hey, you're carrying for this?

It's that kind of meeting.

All right.

I'm strapped.

What are the rules of engagement?

Just don't let me get k*lled.

Roger that.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

I told you if I ever
saw you again, I'd k*ll you.

And yet here I am.

All I'm asking is for you
to hear me out.

After I've said my piece,

you can go ahead and pull that trigger.

[indistinct chatter over radio]

Bob Lee,

you're in luck, buddy.

My sister sent me
some of that strong coffee

from one of them hippy places.

You really need to give this a try.

I'm good, man.
I need to crash.

♪ ♪

Hot damn!
That is some good coffee!

- [laughs]
- I'm never going back

to that swill they serve
in the chow hall.

One cup of this,
and you'll be up for three days.

He ain't lying, man.
I had a cup last night.

I can't close my eyes.

You guys know you'll go crazy
without sleep, right?

- [laughs]
- Oh, really?

And how long do you think
it's gonna take

for this brain of mine to go bad?

♪ ♪

I think that day has come and gone.

- That was a quick nap, Nailer.
- Oh, I got to call your wife.

- I can't wait to meet her.
- Yeah, call mine, too.

Tell her I'm leaving her for Dobbs.

He makes better coffee. [chuckles]

[helicopters whirring overhead]

Hey, when's Donny back from Bagram?

Tomorrow.

Uh, why did you want to see me?

I've been called to Kabul
for an off-the-record meeting

with some civilian bigwig.

It's probably about
that heroin we found.

Or the mullah's wife.

I want to hand her to the Afghans,

but for some reason, my orders
are to keep her in custody.

Guess I'll find out soon enough.

Hey...

you're in charge while I'm gone.

- [g*n cocks]
- Keep your head on a swivel.

Copy.

- I'm not packing.
- Good for you.

Dobbs, you on him?

Yeah, I got him.

You had to bring Dobbs?

If I was gunning for you,
I wouldn't have asked to meet.

Just tell me what you want

before I get sick of hearing your voice.

That att*ck in Frankfurt wasn't random.

It's retaliation for the heroin trade

- we disrupted in Helmand.
- [scoffs]

As usual, your two steps behind.

Yeah, well, you're gonna need my help.

Those guys tracked me down in Bangkok.

They're for real.

If these guys are so badass,
how come you're still alive?

They k*lled Lin.

[suspenseful music]

I'm sorry to hear that,

but I'm not working with you.

- Don't be shortsighted.
- No.

Now, correct me if I'm wrong,

but last time he agreed to work for you,

he ended up America's most wanted.

Someone is hunting ,
and whoever it is

thinks that wives and children
are fair game.

Just like when you took my family?

I had no part in that, Bob Lee...

It was all because of you, assh*le!

Bob Lee...

do I need to remind you
whose house this is?

♪ ♪

No, Father.

- Sorry about the g*ns.
- g*ns? [chuckles]

This is Texas.

I've seen plenty of g*ns in church.

My concern...

is you look like
you're about to use yours.

♪ ♪

Not gonna come to that, Padre.

We're all just saying good-bye.

♪ ♪

Sorry for the disruption.

♪ ♪

[door opens, closes]

Something to confess, mi'jo?

♪ ♪

You don't have the time, Father.

[elevator bell dings]

[telephones ringing, keys clacking]

[indistinct chatter]

I was working for my first paper.

I wrote a puff piece

about how Nixon fed Checkers food

from the White House dinner table.

Apparently he never forgot.

I'm surprised I wasn't ranked higher.

Hey, at least you made the top .

So what can I do for you, Agent Memphis?

Doing research on Afghani heroin

and came across an article
written by a reporter of yours...

Jeffrey Denning.

Problem is no one seems to know
where to find him.

And I thought you might be
here to give me an exclusive

on what really happened
with Bob Lee Swagger last year.

Or was it a coincidence

that every cabinet-level
intelligence chief in town

made sure we didn't poke too hard

into the official story?

I want a face-to-face with Denning.

Then I can't help you.

Mr. Broadwell,
I work for Patricia Gregson...

That's a nice name to drop,

but you'll need more firepower
for me to give up a reporter.

Give up?
Where is he?

- Sabbatical.
- Forced?

What is it exactly you need,
Agent Memphis?

I need to talk to him

about the Golden Crescent

and an international heroin ring

with possible ties
to the U.S. government.

Look, I get that Denning is afraid.

Let him know that I'm here to help.

Or I could have the Bureau
file a missing-persons report,

have all sorts of people
looking for him.

Your choice.

These are confusing times,
Agent Memphis.

Hard to know who you can trust.

You've been in this town
a long time, Mr. Broadwell.

Won't take you ten minutes
to find out whose side I'm on.

After you have...

tell him to give me a call.

♪ ♪

[tires squealing, engine revving]

♪ ♪

[tires screech]

♪ ♪

[g*n cocks]

♪ ♪

[groans]

♪ ♪

[groaning]

[vehicle approaching]

[tires screech, engine revs]

Dobbs, we got to get better
at spotting tails.

He had another one.

Come on!

[groaning]

[man thuds on car]

[groaning]

♪ ♪

[vehicle approaching]

♪ ♪

You know what happens if I let go?

That is completely unnecessary.

No one's gonna sh**t you.

Tell that to Vigo and his friends.

You've had six years to bury this mess.

If your face was exposed
after everything we've done,

the CIA's gonna go into damage control.

They're gonna point the finger at us.

Then people are gonna start
disappearing or going to jail.

I had to protect
the rest of the organization.

Which is why I'm trying to clean it up.

♪ ♪

Yeah, right.

By blowing up U.S. Marines

in Frankfurt and Bangkok?

I'm working alone,

forced to hire freelancers.

Give me a month...

and stop making me work back channels.

You owe me that much.

Do I understand that Bob Lee Swagger

has been drawn into this?

Yes. Unfortunate.

Don't let it get catastrophic.

You got two weeks.

♪ ♪

[car door opens]

Scotty, fix me a drink.

- Two olives.
- Yes, ma'am.

Captain Johnson, forgive me.
Would you like a drink?

I'll settle for a clue of who you are

and what the hell am I doing here.

Patricia Gregson,

Deputy Director
Defense Intelligence Agency.

Why don't we have a seat?

It's come to my attention
that your team made

a very interesting discovery
on your last mission.

I guess bad news travels fast.

It's my job to prevent it
from traveling further.

That trafficking route
used to belong to the Russians,

the FSB, to be clear,

but last year Hugh Meachum,
on behalf of the CIA,

appropriated those routes,
effectively taking over.

The CIA's in the heroin business?

They got very good at it during Vietnam.

It sounds like a problem
between three-letter agencies.

Nothing my team can do about it.

Not your team.

You.

- It's not my job.
- Hugh Meachum likes you.

He seemed okay with me
getting k*lled a month ago.

In Musa Qala, yes.

But the fact that
he's still working with you

means he trust you.

Use that. Help me stop him.

Again, not interested.

Two-star generals fetch me coffee...

Captain.

I'm not asking.

Stumbling onto those heroin routes

has put you and your men
in more danger than you realize.

[indistinct chatter]

Hey.

Are we expecting visitors?

No...
but here they are.

- You in charge?
- Yeah.

- Gunnery Sergeant Swagger.
- Gar Winston.

We were on our way to a meeting
in Marjah when we took fire,

and the truck took one in the fuel t*nk.

Lucky you were in our neighborhood.

[chuckles]

You guys State or DoD?

Where you from, Swagger?

- Texas.
- Never would've guessed.

Most Texans I know are smart enough

to stay on their side of the fence.

Once we get the truck
patched up, we'll be on our way.

- You boys need any help?
- No, no, we're good.

- This truck don't look so good.
- [sighs]

Do yourself a favor
and give us some space.

♪ ♪

All right, set up over here. Let's go.

[slaps truck]

[engine turning over]

♪ ♪

Yo, E-Rod.

♪ ♪

- Is she still in there?
- Yep.

I heard her praying about an hour ago.

What's the policy on moving her?

[scoffs] They don't even
want us talking to her, man.

Well, I need her moved ASAP.

[indistinct chatter]

Is there a problem?

Not if I can help it.

♪ ♪

- Get down!
- [groans]

Does that assh*le speak English?

He better understand.

What's your name?

[breathing heavily]

Dobbs, you got a toolbox in that truck?

Yeah, I do.

Hey, hey, my friends
aren't as nice as me.

You're gonna want to start talking.

♪ ♪

[bone crunches, man groans]

[bones crunching, man yelling]

All right, man, ease up! Ease up!

What? You think
he's gonna answer questions

'cause you asked nicely?

He's a pro.
While you're playing good cop,

his boys could be on the way
to your ranch right now.

[car door closes]

If you don't have the stomach
to do what it takes,

move out of the way
and let me do what I got to do.

Should I set a place for Bob Lee?

Yeah, I'm sure he'll be back soon.

Mary, time for dinner!

- Want to grab another glass?
- Oh, okay.

Mary, come on.

Mary...

Mary!

- [door opens]
- Where in the world...

Mary...

Mary. Hey.

Come here. What are you doing?

Come here.

Why didn't you come to me
whenever I called you?

I didn't want to scare Lauren.

Honey, why would Lauren be scared?

She always gets scared
when Daddy's not here.

That's why I brought her to the bathtub,

because it's a safe place, right, Mommy?

Honey, anywhere you are
in this house is safe.

Anywhere, okay?

Okay.

You make sure Lauren knows that, okay?

You tell her.

Where is Daddy?

- [sizzling]
- [yelling]

- Enough, enough.
- [gasping]

Let's dig a hole.
This guy ain't talking.

No one's digging any holes.

- Get him up.
- [groaning]

[grunts]

What you got?

Elbek Dudayev.

Doesn't it sound Polish or Maltese?

Malta.
Here we go again.

Let's see if old Elbek here
has been to Germany recently.

In the last week, he's been
to Brazil, Egypt...

- Thailand.
- Thailand?

No, no Germany.

You were in Thailand?

[tense music]

Who sent you?

♪ ♪

Solotov.

Solotov. Soloto...

What the hell are you doing, man?

- We needed him alive!
- If he was in Bangkok

in the last three days,
he's the one who k*lled Lin.

I'm sorry about Lin,

but you just k*lled
the best lead we have.

Where are you going?

I'm going to dig a hole.
He's not alone.

Someone's gonna come looking for him.

- Did you get his phone?
- Yeah, yeah, I pulled the SIM.

- Well, put it back.
- We need it.

♪ ♪

- You're gonna try to trace it?
- There's no time.

♪ ♪


[cell phone chiming]

Bingo.

♪ ♪

[cell phone chimes]

Pretty sure that's an ambush.

Well, you took away
any other option we had.

We don't even know what he looks like.

Well, I'm guessing he's gonna be the one

that's trying to k*ll us.

♪ ♪ _

Elbek is dead.

Johnson will meet you at a diner on th.

He'll try and ambush you. Let him.

Make sure he brings you
out front, and I'll be waiting.

♪ ♪

[slow country music plays over speakers]

[bell dings]

[indistinct chatter]

♪ ♪

[doorbell chimes]

♪ ♪

You boys can take a seat anywhere.

♪ ♪

[doorbell chimes]

Here you go.

There you are.

Remember, we're here to get answers,

not put his brains on the wall.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Have a seat.

♪ ♪

There's three of y'all now.
Here you go.

- [g*n cocks]
- Take it easy.

Why are you trying to k*ll him?

♪ ♪

Is it about that heroin?

Your lips ain't moving.

- Not here.
- Outside.

I take it you're not Solotov.

We k*lled your friend, assh*le.

You want to be next?

Sure.

♪ ♪

What the hell are you doing?

Taking him out back to end this sh*t.

- Y'all leaving already?
- [all screaming]

[suspenseful music, heart b*ating]

♪ ♪

[screams]

[gasping]

- You okay?
- I-I think so. Thank you.

- Oh, my God.
- Is everybody okay?

How about a round
of applause for my man,

- Bob Lee, huh?
- [applause]

♪ ♪

All right, it's a good day in Texas!

♪ ♪

[indistinct chatter]

What is this?

What's going on?

- They have a search warrant.
- On what grounds?

Okay, officers, you can go now.

You know who I am?

- Yes, ma'am.
- I'm glad.

That means I don't have to waste
my time threatening you

or stressing how important it is

that you keep your mouth shut
about this encounter.

[clears throat]

- Harris...
- Don't.

[sighs]

- [scoffs]
- [door closes]

You've been using my name
like a credit card

all over this town.

Yeah, well, it worked.
I finally got your attention.

Nadine, I don't know
if you've figured this out yet,

but we're in the containment business.

Dropping my name to Charles Broadwell

is the exact opposite of that.

You know what? Don't pretend
you're upset, Patricia.

You knew who I was when you hired me.

I expected tenacity,
not recklessness, Nadine.

That reporter has
information that I need.

About Afghani heroin.

Do you think I don't know that?

I've spent the last six years
of my life trying to hide it.

They're hunting Marines.

They're hunting Swagger.

Let me give you some advice, Nadine.

If your friends keep
getting you into trouble,

they're not your friends.

Jeffrey Denning doesn't have a story.

If you talk to him, he will.

And what about Swagger?

He's a tough boy.

He can take care of himself.

If you come across any more
intel about the heroin ring,

bring it to me, then contain it.

Understood?

Yeah.

I'll send you my housekeeper.

[door opens]

[indistinct chatter]

[helicopters whirring overhead]

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

Party's starting, fellas.

♪ ♪

You guys looking to say
some prayers this time of night?

Don't screw with me, Swagger.

If the tables were turned,
she'd sell you out

for a bag of almonds.

Don't you mean heroin?

We have standing orders
to hold her in our custody.

No, your orders were to hold her

until we came and got her, dumbass.

Great.

As soon as I hear
from my superior officer,

she's all yours.

♪ ♪

Playtime's over, Jarhead.

Why don't you step aside

and let the big boys do their job, yeah?

We don't play Marine, Haircut.

We are Marines.

Now take my advice
and get the fu... out of here.

♪ ♪

[scoffs]

[g*ns cocking]

♪ ♪

You're on the wrong side
of this, Swagger.

Not the first time.
Won't be the last.

Leave, or my guys bury you in the sand

outside the gate.

My guess is nobody
even knows you're here.

[sighs]

♪ ♪

[exhales deeply]

♪ ♪

Let's go.

♪ ♪

Let's go.

♪ ♪

Well, that got stupid real fast.

[car doors close, engine turning over]

Guard the chapel,
even after they're gone.

Roger that.

[siren wails]

Thought you was limiting your sh**ting

to the range these days, Bob Lee.

I was just catching up
with a Marine buddy,

and this assh*le starts going crazy.

We tried to talk to him.

Witnesses said
you had a black fella with you.

Yeah, he's a friend.

Uh, he's had some issues with the law.

I don't want to get him in trouble.

Well, we can leave him
out of it for now,

but I'm gonna need you
to come down to the station

- to give a statement.
- I'm happy to.

Mind if I stop home
and give Mary a kiss?

Sure. Come by
first thing in the morning.

You got it.

[dark ambient music]

♪ ♪

[fireworks popping, people screaming]

♪ ♪

[gasping]

He's convulsing.
Get me Carbamazepine, stat.

[indistinct shouting]

- What happened to Johnson?
- Hell if I know.

If Solotov was out there,

we wouldn't have made it
from the trucks to this barn.

Oh, that doesn't mean
he's not on his way.

Well, answer me this, Bob Lee.

Why would Solotov want to k*ll us?

He had nothing to do
with that heroin we found.

Man, we can't be certain of anything.

Oh, man, when you think
about it, after all the sh*t

that we did together back in the day,

I can think of a long list of
people that'd want to k*ll us.

You got the Taliban, al...

All right, well, whoever it is...

we're gonna be ready for 'em, all right?

Oh, so you're just gonna go
full-on Swagger mode

and just lay waste to everybody?

Don't worry, man.
We'll... we'll rotate watch...

Negative.
I got to get home, Bob Lee.

You got your family here,
but whomever's after us

might know that my girl's
back in Lubbock.

Okay, well, then you go grab
her and bring her back here.

We're safer as a team.

Why would we be safer as a team?

[sighs] I'll explain in a minute.

Well, maybe you can start off

by explaining what happened at the diner

or the bag of feed,

'cause Joey called...
you know how he gets.

- I was just leaving.
- You can...

- Why don't you...
- Good night.

Oh, you're gonna
come back tomorrow, right?

- Yeah. Good to see you, Julie.
- You bring your girl.

We'll get on the phone with Ali and Tio,

and, uh, we'll figure all this out.

Right on, brother.
I'll see you in the morning.

[sighs]

All right, baby, I'm gonna lock up,

and I'll tell you everything I know.

I'll be right here waiting.

[mellow country music
plays over car stereo]

Hey, darling.

Yeah, I know. I'm gonna be home soon.

Do you want me to pick up
some Ben & Jerry's?

♪ ♪

Yeah. I'll tell you what...

I'll pick the flavor,
and you pick the movie.

All right, I'll see you soon.
I love you.

Bye-bye.

♪ ♪

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[car door beeping]

[beeping stops]

♪ ♪

Hey, it's cool, man. I got a flat.

I'm on top of it.

♪ ♪

I'm serious, brother.
I don't need any help.

Get back to your car.

♪ ♪

[g*nsh*t]

♪ ♪

Son of a bitch, kid.

[g*nsh*t]

[r*fle cocks]

You sure you don't want some?

- Caffeine makes me twitchy.
- Not me. I'm special.

I can drink a gallon and still
stay steady on the g*n.

Yeah?

I think the only thing
steady about you is

the constant stream of nonsense
coming out of your mouth.

I'm just trying to help you out.

Thanks, thanks.

You mind giving me a minute?

No, I get it.

Hey, are you gonna tell him
about last night?

Depends on what he tells me first.

Captain.

How'd it go up in Kabul?

[sighs] Turns out
it's just a bunch of bigwigs

who feel they need to justify
their existence

with PowerPoint slides.

Total waste of time.

Once again, I'm glad I'm not an officer.

[chuckles]

You definitely weren't built to...

handle the bullshit that rolls downhill.

Hey, I'm fine with bullshit.

I'm just glad my role is cleaning it up,

not creating it.

How'd things go in my absence?

Nothing to report.

Good.

Look, I'm gonna go get cleaned up.

Meet me at the TOC in .

Got some things I want to go over.

Okay, boss.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[cell phone vibrating]

[cell phone chimes]

_

[scoffs softly]

♪ ♪

I mean, I... I... I... I...

I can't even believe this. W-what...

You don't know who they are,
you don't know who sent them,

and now Solotov might be one of them?

Baby, I'm sorry.
I wish I had more answers.

No, I don't...
I don't want answers.

I don't. I just want it
to stop, all right?

I can't...
I can't go through this again.

Mary cannot go through this again.

I'm gonna talk to the rest of the group,

- and we're gonna figure it out.
- Figure it out?

How?

- How?
- I don't know yet.

What the hell?

[scoffs]

What's going on? I told you
I'd come down tomorrow.

This ain't about that.
At least I hope it isn't.

What's it about now?

There's been an incident.

[g*nsh*t]

[somber music]

Your buddy Dobbs got sh*t to death.

♪ ♪

Looks like it might have been a robbery.

I'm real sorry, Bob Lee.

♪ ♪

[tense music]

♪ ♪
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