05x03 - Dead Air

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Private Eyes". Aired: May 2016 to present.*
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"Private Eyes" follows an ex-pro hockey player, who irrevocably changes his life when he decides to team up with a fierce P.I. to form an unlikely investigative powerhouse, investigating high-stakes crimes in the worlds of horse racing, fine dining, Toronto's vibrant hip-hop scene, scandalous literature, magic clubs, and more. Based on the novel "The Code".
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05x03 - Dead Air

Post by bunniefuu »

♪ Way back, I was steppin'
with another ♪

♪ Then you walked into my life ♪

♪ One look and my heart
was undercover ♪

♪ It was gone, all right ♪

WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
WHOA! WHOA!

It won't do the one job
it's supposed to. It's broken.

- I'LL GET IT FIXED!
- TAKE YOUR HEADPHONES OFF!

Oh.

Dark roast Americano, right?

(beeping)
(playful music)

What? It wasn't working.
I pressed every button.

- Interesting button.
- OK. Listen, when I said

I wanted a new coffee maker,
I meant the exact same one

- I had before.
- But this one...

mimics pour-over, so the grounds
are perfectly saturated.

Plus, it heats
the water to 169 degrees,

the ultimate temperature
for making a cup of coffee.

And it has a frother!

- I like my coffee un-frothed.
- Are you sure

you're not just... tired
from being out on another date

with your rock star boyfriend?
I guess he's forgiven you

- for ignoring him in high school.
- Oh, he's forgiven me,

all right. What about you?
How was your date

with Jada yesterday?
Oh, wait. Let me guess:

Ice cream on a park bench
at two in the afternoon.

It was noon.
We enjoyed a light lunch.

What is with the lunches?
I mean, take her out

- for a nice dinner already.
- I plan to.

We've just both been busy,
that's all.

- Hi there.
- Hi.

(woman chuckles nervously)

Can we help you?

Um, I don't know. I've never
done anything like this before.

Oh!

Thank you.

I haven't had
my morning cup yet.

- You're welcome.
- (woman sighs)

OK. My husband is hiding
something from me.

$52 580, to be exact.

It went missing
from our savings account.

- Did you ask him about it?
- He said he invested it

in stocks for our retirement,

but he keeps forgetting
to show me any paperwork.

Well, money always leaves
a paper trail. I'm sure

- we could find it for you.
- There's more.

- It's embarrassing.
- Anything you say here is confidential.

He's been acting... strange.

One moment, he's loving.
The next, he barely looks at me.

He doesn't sleep. I find him
awake in the middle of the night,

just... staring.
The other day, he came home

smelling like an ashtray.
He doesn't even smoke.

I mean, his whole thing is
openness and honesty.

Well, both of those can be
hard sometimes.

No, you don't understand.

Open and honest is
Rohan's catchphrase.

Your husband has
a catchphrase?

Uh...

Is your husband Dr. Rohan Love?

He is, yes.

- Who?
- Dr. Love's Power Hour,

56.3 FM.

He wrote a book
on modern couples therapy.

Please, you'll find out
what he's hiding?

Sure. Solving mysteries is
what we do.

Consider that our catchphrase.

♪ I see you and you see me ♪

♪ Watch you blowin' the lines
when you're makin' a scene ♪

♪ Oh boy, you've got to know ♪

♪ What my head overlooks ♪

♪ The senses will show
to my heart ♪

♪ When it's watching for lies
'cause you can't escape my ♪

♪ Private Eyes
They're watching you ♪

♪ Private Eyes ♪

♪ They're watching you,
watching you, watching you ♪

♪ Watching you ♪

$52 580.

A number that specific must be
easy to match.

Zoe, what can you tell us
about his radio show?

So Dr. Love's Power Hour is
a daily column therapy show

where people call in
to ask for advice.

But my favourite episodes are
when he brings a couple

into the studio, usually on
the brink of a breakup,

and does a live therapy session.
I'll show you.

- Is it recorded?
- And streamed online.

Oh, this is a good one.

Emily has cancer,

and while she was at home,
recovering from chemo,

she develops
a shopping addiction.

She spends all of her
and her wife's savings.

Meanwhile, Jess...

she feels emotionally trapped
because she can't be mad

at Emily 'cause,
you know, well, cancer.

Seems so intrusive,
so... voyeuristic.

1000%. It's amazing!

- (click)
- Jessie,

how does it make you feel
when you hear Emily talk

- about her spending addiction?
- Awful.

I feel like I'm not allowed
to be mad at her

because she's so sick.

Oftentimes, we set aside
our feelings

because we're comparing them
to others,

but the key is
to always communicate.

Be authentic with how you're
feeling, what you're doing.

- (click)
- Ugh! Communicate?

Be authentic? This guy needs
to practise what he preaches.

Oh...

Would you two stop it?

Vulnerability always
gets to me.

Wow. OK. Um...

I am a well-known radio host
and a psychologist.

What do I need that 52K can buy?

And what about
the mood swings? Didn't Meera

say that he's been a different
guy the last couple of weeks?

Is there anyone down at the
station that he's close with?

Oh, Trash Williams.

His show is
on right after Dr. Love,

and the two of them have
this on-air rivalry.

He's your basic
middle-aged broski.

- What does that even mean?
- You, basically,

but... less fussy.

Is this still about
the coffee maker?

Uh, maybe Trash Williams has
some intel he'd like to share.

Maybe he knows something
about Rohan's work life

that Meera's in the dark about?
What's his show?

Trash Talk Sports Thrown Down.

The Trash Talk Sports Thrown
Down is live with your host,

Trash Williams!

And a very surprise
special guest,

Matt "The Shadow" Shade.

(rock music playing)

- Uh, thanks for having me.
- Hey. Stoked, man.

Puck bros for life?
(Matt chuckles)

Yeah.
(mysterious music)

(phone ringing)

Hmm.

What went wrong?

(camera clicking)

- Looking for something?
- Rohan Love!

I mean, sorry, um, Dr. Love.

I've actually been
looking for you.

- Hmm. Here I am.
- I'm...

Matt Shade's publicist.

- Mmhm.
- Not a fan of sports.

Well, me neither, but I am
a fan of yours, though.

You actually helped me
through my last breakup.

- That's terrific.
- Yeah. Sorry.

Are you, uh, moving?

- Can I help you with something?
- No.

But maybe I can help
you with something. See,

as a publicist, it's, uh,
my job to pay close attention

to... public image,

and I couldn't help
but notice that, you know,

there's been a shift
in your persona recently.

I mean, even a small change can
crash and burn a career.

My job is to put out fires
before they become...

bigger fires.
Think about your listeners,

your loyal fans.
I mean, they need you.

Well, the old you.
You can tell me.

- What's going on?
- Hmm.

I appreciate your concern.
I don't need a publicist.

Excuse me.

(sighs)

- (inaudible speaking)
- We're talking more

with Matt Shade
about how the game has changed

for the softer when we get back.

- It's Dr. Love.
- What's really important

is you talk about your feelings.

- Boo-hoo! Call your mama!
- ...is you talk

- about your feelings.
- Boo-hoo!

- Talk about your feelings.
- Boo-hoo!

Don't be a baby!
Tune in at one to talk

with Trash Williams on the
Trash Talk Sports Throw Down.

(click)

Wow. That's pretty harsh
towards Dr. Love.

Ah, it's all for show.
He comes after me.

I box back. It's ratings gold.

- And we used to be pretty tight.
- Used to be? What happened?

Locker room code of silence?

He thinks he's God's gift
to relationships, right?

But dude's on his third wife.

Oh. That's not something
The Love Doctor advertises.

Right?! I mean,
it'd t*nk his ratings,

which haven't been great lately

because he's been
a real jerk to his callers.

If he's not careful, he's gonna
get ejected from the game.

Anyway, what's up
with your publicist?

She's got a really nice smile.

(laughing)

Yeah, she's taken.

(upbeat music)

2 p.m. smoke break. Wow.

He really keeps to his schedule.
(phone ringing)

- Hey.
- Hey. I just got out. Where are you?

Uh, the corner
of Richmond and Spadina.

I'm following Rohan.
I got a pic of his schedule.

- How'd it go with Trash?
- [He said Love's tanking]

at work, and he's got secrets,

like Meera being his third wife.

Love's not so lucky in love.
She might just be

his third ex-wife soon.
He's got a dinner date scheduled

for tonight, and I've got
a hunch it's not with her.

I can't get to you.
Damn traffic.

Oh, that's fine.
I'll just follow him by myself.

- You sure?
- Yeah. I'll meet you later.

(dramatic sound indication)

(lively music)

(cutlery clinking)

- Councilwoman.
- Your signature.

It's worth a fortune, I hear.

I'm serious, Don.
You're one of the last holdouts

on my petition to rejuvenate
the Gardenview Parkette.

And, as a local business owner,
I need your signature.

You're rejuvenating nothing.
You're turning

all the green space
into parking lots and condos.

I'm telling you,
I am not signing that thing.

You wanna stand in the way
of progress? Fine.

The Red Bird might not be
long for this world anyway.

Whatever you say, Marcy.

Have a nice day.
(Mary sighs)

- (door opens)
- Who was that?

That is a local councillor
who's a real pain in my...

you know what. Every few months,
she comes up with a new idea

to "modernize"
the neighbourhood.

Yeah, but the Gardenview
was planted specifically

to attract bees and other
pollinators. Why would she want

- to destroy it?
- Maybe she's allergic.

Heh. Well, she doesn't care
about anything but herself

and retaining that tiny
little slim piece of power.

Well, maybe there's
something we can do.

Oh, there's something
we can do, all right.

Muffins. I'm in the mood.
Blueberry sound good?

- Sure, Grandpa.
- All right.

- We can do more than muffins.
- I knew you'd say that.

Zoey, will you make a note

that I am definitely
not a broski?

Jada! Hey!

Oh!

I wanted to surprise
you with lunch.

But you weren't here,
so your assistant got lucky.

(Matt laughing)

Listen,
as much as I appreciate

these impromptu day dates,
I cannot wait to take you out

- for a proper meal.
- Oh, you're just trying

to get me drunk so I spill
the dirt on Angie.

Oh, I've got all the dirt
on her that I need.

I knew her
as a rebellious teenager.

She's still
a rebellious teenager.

Seriously, though, I've got
one week left of dreaded

parent-teacher interviews,
and then I am all yours.

I just... I wanted
to make that clear.

Hmm. No, that's not
really clear enough.

- No?
- Mm-mm.

What could I do get
that message across?

Oh, I'm sure we could
come up with something.

- (buzzing)
- Is that your phone buzzing?

It's most definitely
his phone. It's probably Angie.

Yeah. Angie and I have
a work thing tonight.

I should probably get
home and prep. Sorry.

No! Go. Go. It's, uh,
this wasn't planned, so.

All right.
Well, date night soon.

You, me, fancy restaurant,
a good bottle of wine?

I can't wait.

(piano music)

(indistinct chatter)

Excellent choice.

Are we celebrating
anything special this evening?

- A quiet night without work.
- I got sh*t and survived.

Wonderful!

To...

- seizing the day.
- A peaceful evening.

(both): What you said.

(laughing)

- (Matt): They seem cozy.
- Real cozy.

Let's see if Zoe Chow

can put a name
to this mystery woman.

So Dr. Love is
having an affair.

Maybe... in-person therapy
for a regular caller?

Looks like a pretty hands-on
approach to therapy,

don't you think?
(beep)

- Hey, hey!
- [Hey! Are you]

[still trying to hack
into that flash drive?]

No luck yet, but you know me.
I love a good challenge.

Great! Well, then,
I, uh, challenge you

not to freak out at the picture
I just texted you.

- Who dis?
- [That would be]

the mystery woman that Dr. Love
is currently on a date with.

But... Meera's the love
of his life!

That's not Meera.
I hate Not Meera.

Let's try and figure out
her real name.

Oh, one more thing?

And you're not gonna
like this either.

We need you to look
into his two ex-wives.

No. Mm-mm.
I refuse to believe.

I hate to burst your bubble,
but it might be worth a follow.

- Speaking of following.
- Zoe, I'll call you back.

(phone clatters)
(sighs heavily)

(tense music)

I love you so much.
(both laughing)

- Thank you.
- OK.

- Thank you.
- OK.

Seriously.

(siren blaring)
(honking)

- Do you see that?
- ROHAN, GET DOWN!

(g*nsh*t)

(Angie breathing rapidly)
Deep breaths.

I'm fine! I'm fine! I'm fine!

Damn it. We blew our cover.



(Kn*fe clicks)

(grunts)

(rising dramatic music)

Someone just tried
to k*ll Dr. Love.

(tense music)

Are you sure you're OK? You were
pretty shook up last night.

- All good.
- Do you have the b*llet?

- (Matt sighs)
- I mean, it's understandable.

It's the first g*nsh*t you heard
since you got sh*t yourself.

- It's OK to freak out.
- I didn't freak out!

- OK. Yeah. Maybe... a little.
- Hey, it's normal.

- I know you're tough.
- OH, ANGIE! Matt!

OK. Can somebody just tell me
what's going on?

- (Meera sighs)
- Dr. Love. Hi.

Uh, wasn't expecting you.

Well, I wasn't expecting
my wife to hire

private investigators.
Miss Publicist!

- I couldn't keep it from him.
- Not if we're

- getting the cops involved.
- We're not getting

- the cops involved.
- Dr. Love, with all

due respect,
this is a little more serious

than we initially thought.
Your life is clearly in danger.

And what is it
that you initially thought?

This is just a misunderstanding

- between me and my wife. I...
- Ugh.

I still can't believe you went behind
my back without even speaking to me.

I tried, but you're lying
about where that money went,

where you go at night,
why your mood swings are

all over the map. You need
to stop gaslighting me!

- I wish you would just...
- just trust me.

(scoffs)

- Here it is.
- Good, thanks.

I love your show.
Hate that you're a target.

- I'm not a target.
- Right.

Uh... Well, can you think
of any reason

anyone might want you dead?
Have you noticed anyone

- following you around lately?
- No one's been following me.

Oh, other than
these two right here.

They're the reason
why my phone is broken.

OK. Angie,

did you see anyone
following him yesterday?

I was... out
for a stroll when you were

- taking your smoke break.
- I knew you were smoking!

Who even are you?

- Let's all just calm down.
- Meena, can you please go

to the car? I promise
I'll tell you everything.

Sweetheart, please.

Rohan. You need to talk to us.

Meena suffers from
chronic anxiety, and all you're

doing is feeding into it,
so back off.

And that b*llet? It's a stray.

What you need to do is find
the person who's been

toying around with a g*n.
But this case is closed.

- He doesn't say that.
- I say that.

And this case is
definitely not closed.

My spidey senses are tingling.

- Same.
- Yeah. We know what we saw.

Somebody took a sh*t
at that guy.

Well, I'll take this b*llet
to the lab and, hopefully,

- it gives us something to go on.
- So Dr. Love makes

a huge payment, then almost
gets sh*t. The two have

- to be connected.
- What do we know

- about his ex-wives?
- One lives in Miami,

the other in Berlin. That'd be
a pretty far-travelling b*llet.

Besides, I have new intel.

- The mystery woman!
- When you sent me that pic

last night, I thought
I recognized her.

I did some research
this morning. Mystery woman

is Dr. Love's former co-host
from a few years ago,

Whitney Wu, sensational sexpert.

Oh. It wouldn't be the first
time two co-workers fell

- for each other.
- Yeah.

Uh, one other thing.

While I was digging around,
I found out

that a lot
of Dr. Love's fans are

- really angry at him.
- Like revenge-level angry?

Maybe? @thehappylovebug has
been going off.

There's a huge
anti-Dr. Love storm brewing,

and Love Bug, aka Deanne,
is in the eye of it.

It seems like she's upset
about his change in attitude.

Yep. Apparently, he went from
being positive to nihilistic,

being negative,
not listening anymore.

Yeah, Trash Williams
mentioned that too,

but what does that have to do
with the missing money?

"Dr. Love should take
his so-called advice

and crawl into a dark hole
and die."

For the name Happy Love Bug,
she's got a lot of anger.

- Yeah.
- So who do you want?

- Angry tweeter or sexpert?
- I'll take the angry tweeter.

The last thing I need is someone
else poking around my love life.

- Noted.
- And I'll keep trying

to hack this flash drive.
I just need to figure out

a password of 20 random
numbers and letters.

What? I'm getting close.

(birds chirping)

(soft music)

I'm so relieved you called.

It's about time the world knew
what a fraud Dr. Love is.

How many hits did you say
your blog gets?

- Our numbers are way up there.
- But I wanna hear your story.

What did Dr. Love do to you?

Well, heh, I mean...

the problem is
what he stopped doing.

I have been loyal to Dr. Love

for years. I call him weekly.

I tell him my deepest,
darkest secrets.

And, a couple of weeks ago,
this man completely

- turned on his flock.
- Yeah. I've heard

- the rumours.
- His bedside manner

has no manners. Write that down.

And, you know what? You know
what he told me? He told me,

"Shut up or break up because
nothing matters in the end."

Yeah. That is harsh.

10 years I've been
with my husband.

He still won't deal
with his snoring,

so I am chronically
sleep deprived.

And I have tried the
melatonin thing. OK? We just,

- we can't communicate, you know?
- Mmhm.

I suspect you're very good

at hiding your truth,
even from yourself.

Um, actually, my truth,

right now, is that my therapist
has become uncaring.

I mean, his advice is
borderline dangerous.

If he should be reported,

you can let me know.
This is a safe space.

When did you last see him?

I don't exactly...

see him. He's on the radio.

Do you mean Dr. Rohan Love?

I do. Do you know him?

I was a guest cohost for years
but left to do my doctorate.

Actually, I saw him last night.

- Like... on a date?
- Oh! God, no!

Platonic since the day we met.

I lay awake at night
just... wondering

why he suddenly became
such a jerk.

And yet, I'm terrified of what
I'd do without my therapy hour.

It's hard to know what
somebody might be dealing with

behind closed doors.
And you wouldn't lose

your call-in therapy,
even without Dr. Love.

What do you mean,
without Dr. Love?

(softly): Is he leaving
the show!?

- Oh, my God! He is, isn't he?!
- Even if Dr. Love was,

let's say, retiring... and I'm not
officially saying that...

I'm certain he'd give the reins
to someone he trusts.

- Like you?
- I can't say.

Well, if he is retiring,
and I'm not officially asking,

then... why would he
keep it a secret?

Let's leave Rohan aside
and focus on Angie.

(sighs)
If you're calling Dr. Love,

can I assume it's
about a romantic relationship?

We're just business partners.

Um... sorry.

Uh... people assume that
about us.

- Me and my business partner.
- Do you two get along?

Yeah. Yeah.

What if you try, and it doesn't
work out, and then

you destroy everything that was
good in the first place?

I always say...

...if you wonder
about something,

and you wonder for a while,

it's probably
because it's not the worst idea.

(dog barking)

And with that,
he sealed his fate.

And he needs to be cancelled

because he is a disgrace
to his profession.

(slurping)

(sighs)
Is that enough?

- Did you get all that down?
- Yes.

- Yes, I did.
- OK.

Well, send me the link
when it's posted.

And I'll tweet it out.
Thanks again!

Thank you.

(whispering): Wow.

(phone ringing)

- Hey. How'd it go with Deanne?
- Did she spill anything?

- Well, she spilled, all right.
- I barely got two words

in edgewise,
but she's harmless.

She's mad at Love for being

a bad listener.
What did Whitney say?

It turns out
Rohan's leaving the show.

He's tapped Whitney
to replace him.

I'm not surprised, though.
That woman is impressive.

So neither Deanne
nor Whitney is

a thr*at to Rohan's life,

which begs the question:

What the hell is going on?

(streetcar bell dinging)
(jazz music)

- Hey! - Hey!
- Hey.

Zack!

I totally forgot that you were
coming over tonight.

Um, we... we still have
some work to finish.

Yeah, it's cool.

I brought some food
and, uh, some beer,

and there's more than enough
for everyone.

- Thank you!
- Ah.

- You don't mind?
- The more the merrier.

- Thanks.
- Yeah.

- Thanks.
- OK.

- Mm.
- All right.

Ahem.

Um, Danica called.

- The b*llet's unmarked.
- Ah.

- That's another dead end.
- Not quite.

I hacked
into Love's flash drive.

It's actually
a bitcoin wallet. Look.

He deposited 4.5 bitcoins

the same day he withdrew
the 52 580.

The conversion works out.

But then, he transferred it
to someone else.

- Can we find out who?
- This kind of cryptocurrency

transaction is
impossible to trace.

Huh. Untraceable b*llet,
untraceable payment.

It looks like Dr. Love's
involved in something illegal.

(phone beeps)

It's something from Meera.

It's a life insurance policy
she found in Love's home office.

Oh, my God. Shade.

Double payment
for unnatural death or m*rder.

So the wife did it.

She hired someone to m*rder him
for the money. Right?

If she hired us, why would she
send us incriminating material?

- Part of her cover?
- Maybe they're working together.

- We're missing something.
- Let's focus on what we do know.

We do know that someone is
trying to k*ll

Dr. Love. We know that because
of the untraceable b*llet.

And we also know
that he doesn't seem to care.

He's been acting weird
for two weeks. Plus, he has

a secret exit plan
from his radio show.

We know the untraceable
payment came from him,

and now we have
this new insurance information.

He hired someone to m*rder him
for the insurance money.

Did Dr. Love hire
his own hitman?

(suspenseful music)

Holy crap.

(rhythmic music)
(honking)

- Oh, hey!
- That's my handsome face.

And it screams "trustworthy."

"Vote Don." Why?

You're going to win
Councilwoman Marcy Dodd's

soon-to-be-up-for-grabs
city council spot.

- OK. Funny prank. Thanks, guys.
- No, no!

It's not a prank!
It's not a prank. Just listen.

Jules has a whole plan.

Marcy's term is almost over.

The vote is in six weeks,
and she's running against

such a sad roster of people
that her win is inevitable.

That means four more years
of her trying to push you

and everything good
about this neighbourhood out.

Guys, I can't run for City
Council. I'm not qualified.

You've lived here
your entire life.

You own a beloved
local business.

And, most importantly,
you care about this community.

- How is that for qualified?
- OK. But who's

- even gonna vote for me?
- I'd vote for you.

- Thank you.
- You talk to every person

that comes in here.
You like hearing

about their stories,
and they like you.

Plus, you drive around
in a truck

that literally has
your name on it.

- (chuckles)
- OK. But it's...

it's expensive
to run a campaign.

I don't have that kind
of cash flow right now.

Well, welcome
to crowdfunding, Grandpa.

We've created an online petition
to help gather support.

And... and we've gotten
40 signatures in an hour.

That's some impressive growth.

40? In an hour?

You can save
the Gardenview Parkette.

And stop whatever
coffee chain monstrosity

that probably paid off
Councilwoman Dodd.

Think about it. OK? This is
your chance to be a hero.

(rhythmic music)

Are you seriously

boycotting the new
coffee maker already?

You haven't even
read the manual.

You shouldn't need
a manual to make a coffee.


Anyhow... I spoke with Meera

this morning, and she's keeping
an eye on Rohan.

Except we're not even sure
this is a m*rder for hire.

This is definitely
a m*rder for hire.

I went down a scary rabbit hole,
researching what 52K

can buy you on the dark web,
and the answer is

a lot of disturbing things.

But I did find
a price list for hitmen,

and you'll never guess
how much a m*rder costs.

- $52 000.
- Give or take 580.

I talked to Danica,
and the cops have been

monitoring dark web
crime activity,

- including a string of murders.
- If only we knew when the hit was gonna happen.

Mm! Wait for it.

Take a look
at Dr. Love's calendar.

There's nothing scheduled
for after today,

almost like he's not planning
on being here.

- So the hitman has a deadline.
- Regardless, we are talking

about sn*per r*fles and
professional K*llers. Maybe we

should take a step back and let
the police take this one.

No. Meera trusted us
with this.

OK. Zoe, see if you can

pull up Dr. Love's schedule
for the past two weeks.

Maybe we can see something
out of the ordinary in there.

- OK... Look.
- Two weeks before the 52 000

goes missing. Rohan has a
doctor's appointment. Migraines.

Maybe he got
some bad news from the doc.

News that made him do
something drastic.

All of a sudden,
I'm not feeling so hot.

We'd better get you
to the doctor.

(phone ringing)
(music playing over speakers)

- Hi there.
- Hi. Do you have

- an appointment?
- Not yet, but...

Oh! I've got
this pain in my chest.

- Yeah.
- Oh. Oh, is that bad?

- Sir! Sir!
- Help! Help!

- Oh! Whoa!
- Agh!

OK. OK. Sir. Breathe.

- I can smell toast.
- Cinnamon toast. Oh!

- Is that normal? Oh!
- Hold still. DR. NYDOO!

- (Matt): Oh, I can see stars...
- (indistinct speaking)

(intriguing music)

I don't know what happened.

The pain just pierced
through my chest.

That's when I ended up
on the floor. It felt like...

getting slammed into the boards.

- Hockey player?
- Yeah, years ago.

Hmm. Any kind of sports-
related injuries can have

a lasting effect
that show up later in life.

Oh. Well, I appreciate
you seeing me.

You came highly recommended
by Rohan Love.

Rohan? I've been trying
to reach him.

- Oh, yeah?
- Well, he broke his phone.

I'd be happy
to pass along a message.

Doctor-patient
confidentiality.

Right.

But please, tell him
to call me as soon as possible.

Yeah, sure thing.

- You can undress.
- I'll do a full exam.

(rubber glove snaps)

- (buzzing)
- Um...

I don't know what you did,
Doc, but I feel like a new man.

I didn't do anything.

Well, those hands
work miracles.

Amazing performance, Meryl.

- Thank you.
- I did take her masterclass.

(birds chirping)
What's this?

"Brain metastasis
in right hemisphere."

Love has a brain tumour.

- Wait. Hold on.
- Over here, it says,

"technical error,"
and there's a reprint.

OK. This is
from this morning, and...

- "Patient clear."
- No brain tumour?

That's why Dr. Nydoo was trying
to get a hold of him.

Love hasn't heard
the good news yet.

He's been walking around for
two weeks, thinking that he's

dying of a brain tumour
that doesn't even exist.

If he believes
he's a dead man...

why not go the extra mile

- for double the insurance money?
- He paid

$50 000 to ensure
that Meera was left

with a hell of a lot
more than that.

- Yeah.
- Love did it for love.

(ringing and buzzing)

(beep)
Hey, Meera. Is everything OK?

- [Rohan is gone.
- I was doing dishes, and]

[the next thing I know,
he just... he wasn't there!]

OK. Just stay calm. Um...

Does he have GPS in his vehicle?

- [Yeah! Yes, he does!
- I didn't even think of that.]

OK. Um, log into your system
and send us the coordinates.

- Stay where you are.
- We're on this.

There's definitely a hitman out
there, trying to finish the job.

Or a hitwoman because women
don't try to finish the job.

They get the job done.

(upbeat music)

That's Love's car.

(ominous music)

Dr. Love!

Hey! Angie.

STOP!

- I knew it was hitwoman!
- (fast-paced music)

I'll drive
around the other side!

(tires squeal)

- There's been a misunderstanding!
- We wanna call off the hit!

Rule number one:
Always finish the job.

Really?! Come on!

What the hell?

(grunts)

(tires squeal)
(grunts)

(engine starts)

- Did you see that?
- Us not catch the woman

that's trying to k*ll
our client's husband? Yeah.

- I caught a glimpse.
- What are you guys doing here?

Stop following me and stay away!

We know you hired
a contract k*ller.

And we know you did it to get
double the insurance money.

You guys are gonna
ruin everything!

No! We're saving you.

Your brain tumour was
a technical error.

- Your scans came back clear.
- Yeah. Your doctor's been

- trying to call you all day.
- Oh, my phone.

I didn't bother replacing it.
Wait. So this means...

You're not dying. At least,
not from a brain tumour.

You need to cancel that hit!

You don't understand. I can't.

(seagulls cawing)

(indistinct chatter)

- (sighs)
- Does anyone have a cigarette?

- (both): No.
- Yeah. Addiction happens

so quickly. I started smoking
two weeks ago.

I guess I need
to focus on quitting.

You need to focus
on calling off your hit!

Is there a number
you could call,

- or an email maybe?
- It's no use.

They called me
from a blocked number just once.

There's... there's no way
to contact them.

Makes sense. The whole point
of a hit is to be untraceable.

What's done is done.

And what were
your specific instructions?

That I had to be alone...

so no one would be traumatized
by witnessing the hit.

And that it had to happen
before midnight on Friday.

- As in tonight?
- I wanted it to happen

before the tumour
sent me into a coma.

You'd lose
the double insurance.

Well, as long
as one of us stays

by your side, we should
be able to keep you safe.

(phone ringing)
(beep)

- Hey, Zoe.
- [Guys! I need you here, ]

[right now!]
(suspenseful music)

- I only stepped out to eat lunch!
- Time for a new license plate,

- Shade17.
- My laptop's gone,

the... the bitcoin wallet,

- all the files on this case.
- Yeah, it's smart.

She wanted to make sure she took
any information on her we had.

She could be
watching us right now.

Or... she could be anywhere.

Uh... Where's Dr. Love?

- Uh, he's at the Red Bird.
- My dad's keeping an eye

on him. We should all get
out of here. Zoe, go home.

Well, on the plus side,
the coffee maker you hate

- is busted.
- What?! I might've hated

that coffee maker,
but that was mine to destroy.

Tell Danica we're on our way.
Let's go. We're taking my car.

See if Danica found
anything on the g*n.

(door opens and closes)

(indistinct speaking over radio)

So you're all
potentially in danger now

because you did

hire a hit on yourself
via the dark web?

- Yes.
- OK.

(playful music)

Can we help
you find something?

Do either of you have change
for the vending machine?

Because I need sugar.

You know, people in general
don't like being lied to, Dr. Love,

- and the police are no exception.
- Well, you're absolutely right

in feeling deceived,
angry, you know.

Actually, this isn't
about feelings. This is

about misleading the police
about a very dangerous woman

attached to a string of murders.
Sweet or salty?

- Sweet. - Salty.
- Whatever you like.

- Yeah.
- (beep)

Ahem.

I also feel
it's worth mentioning

that hiring a hitman is
an indictable offence.

- Am I under arrest?
- No, not yet.

Where are you going?

I'm just going
to the bathroom.

Not alone, you're not.



So the deadline for the hit is
in a couple of hours.

Ahem. Do you all really
need to be here?

Yes because you can't
be left alone,

and we need to figure out
a plan. We have to get

to the hitwoman
before she gets to us.

And we need to do
that before tonight.

That's not enough time
to get a taskforce together.

But, given the circumstances,

if you would be willing
to help with a sting?

- Yeah, of course we'll help.
- Let's teach this hitwoman

- a thing or two.
- What are you gonna teach her?

How to roast
a perfect coffee bean?

I mean, it's a woman
with a sn*per r*fle.

We need to get her somewhere
where she can't use her g*n.

True. You can't be
a sn*per in a tight space.

Trust me, I tried.
It did not go well.

- I can think of one place.
- We can

- lure her there with Dr. Love.
- Whoa, whoa! Hold on a second.

I... I thought we were all here
to put me in protective custody,

not put me in the same place
as my k*ller.

You know,
the sooner you finish,

the sooner we can get started.

- (siren blaring)
- That's right, folks.

It's Dr. Love. I'm here

late night style, no guests.

Just, uh, you and I,

my listeners,
to whom I owe an apology.

I haven't been myself lately.

Two weeks ago...

I received
some dire medical news,

which, um...
well, frankly, it scared me.

And I let that fear take over.

I assumed I knew
what was best for my wife and I

without even talking to her.

She's my third wife, by the way.

I don't wanna hide that anymore.

Another assumption
I made was... you,

my faithful listeners, would...

...well, that you would judge
me on my past failures.

(ominous music)
Again, I let fear drive me,

and I hurt our relationship.

Meera is the love of my life.

A love I almost squandered...

...because I made assumptions
based out of fear.

The thing is...
(clattering)

...I'm not afraid anymore.

Ah!

(both grunting)

- Are you OK?
- Freeze!

(whimpers)
(grunting)

You sure taught her.

(dramatic music)

Stop! You're under arrest
for the attempted m*rder

of Rohan Love! OK. Well,
you don't have to show off.

- I get it.
- Ah!

(panting)



- (Angie): STOP!
- THERE'S NOWHERE TO GO!

(Matt): Is she going to jump?

(Angie): No,
she's sliding down.

- Ah.
- (exhales sharply)

I regret quitting gymnastics
right about now.

Ah!

- They'll never catch her.
- Not like that, but we can.

She'll have to go around the
side of the building. Come on.

(exhales sharply)

What have you done with my
partner who's afraid of heights?

She decided to trust herself.

- Now shut up and jump.
- OK.

(Angie whimpers)

(dramatic music)

- Oh! Ah!
- (grunting)

Oh...
(panting)

Rule number one:
Always finish the job.

Don't worry. They've got
state-of-the-art gyms

in federal prison.
(sirens blaring)

- Thanks for your help, Danica.
- You're the ones who jumped off

a roof. Thank you.
This arrest will give closure

to a whole string of murders.
You hear that sound?

Mm. Water in my ear.

That's the sound
of my promotion.

Now, I'm going to go talk to
Dr. Love about my relationship

problems with my mother.

- (Angie groans softly)
- Dare I ask?

I'll be good
as new in no time.

Speaking of new, we need
a new coffee maker. I'll go

- pick one up in the morning.
- No, you won't.

We'll be doing that together.

- How about a towel?
- Can I get you one of those?

- Oh, yes, please. This one smells like lake scum.
- Yeah, no kidding.

- This is so exciting! Oh!
- (Jules laughs)

Wow! Really slick.

- Maybe a little too slick?
- Can't go back now, Grandpa.

Liam's at home sorting the other
three boxes we ordered.

I guess I'm all in, then.

You know, what you're doing,
it's so important.

Well... saving a park

isn't exactly...
changing the world.

- What do you mean? Of course it is.
- Change happens one small step at a time.

And, you know, I couldn't have
taken any of those steps

- without you, sweetie.
- Aw. Well, stick with me,

Grandpa. They might even
name a bench after you.

- (laughing)
- Oh, look at this!

Welcome back
to Dr. Love's Power Hour.

Rohan is safe,
thanks to the two of you.

I'm so grateful.

- It's our pleasure.
- He seems happy.

I'm going to be taking
some time off, but I don't

want you to worry,
dear listeners. You'll be

in the very capable hands

of relationship expert and
sex therapist, Dr. Witney Wu.

Glad to be back
in the booth, Rohan.

- And I'm thrilled to hear it.
- And I want to give

a very special shout out
to the Everett and Shade Agency

for... getting me out

of a very difficult predicament.

I just met them. Great couple.

Hello, listeners.
Let me tell you

a little bit about myself.
I have been a therapist

for nine years, and I am all
about open communication

with your loved ones,
especially when it comes to...

(all chuckle)

- Great.
- I know.

Hey, Doc. Um...

from my fan club.

Keep you safe while you're
cleaning up the highway.

(all laugh)

- Thanks, Trash.
- Hey, seriously, uh,

- barbeque at my place this weekend?
- Yeah. Yeah. We'll be there.

All right.

So you start
community service tomorrow.

Yeah. 300 hours.

Better than prison, and...

I don't know, I think
it'll be good for me.

Hey, at least
you're still alive.

- You can say that again.
- Yeah.

- We're both so relieved.
- So are we.

The world shouldn't
be deprived of Dr. Love.

♪ Tomorrow, tomorrow ♪

I know we said we would do
this together,

but... ta-da!

That's the same model

as my old one.
Now that I can assemble myself.

- (Matt chuckles)
- It comes assembled.

- I knew that.
- I meant plug it in.

- Thank you.
- I guess I, uh,

shouldn't have assumed you would
like that coffee maker

I picked up. I should have
discussed it with you.

No, it's OK. I need to work

on my fear of new things.
Gotta have trust.

- Right?
- I think we do pretty well.

Yeah, we do.

(soft music)

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