02x06 - Doof's Day Out & Disco Do-Over

[bunniefuu]

[theme song playing]

♪ Look at that sun
Look at that sky ♪

♪ Look at my sweater vest
I look so fly ♪

♪ Look at that mailbox
Look at that tree ♪

♪ It's about as beautiful as it can be ♪

♪ Whoa

♪ Today is gonna be exceptional ♪

♪ Never boring even for a minute ♪

♪ It's my world
And we're all livin' in it ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa ♪

♪ Never boring even for a minute ♪

♪ It's my world
And we're all livin' in it ♪

So, it's been weeks now.

When are we going to do something
about Doofenshmirtz?

We are doing something.

We're waiting for him
to become Professor Time.

He's way overstayed
his welcome!

I don't know. I kind of like
him living here.

Well, he's driving me insane.

He never leaves the house

and he's constantly
getting into my business.

But, Neal, that's why Time Ape
has a clock for a head.

[Doofenshmirtz on phone]
Yeah, duh.

Doofenshmirtz? How are you
listening in on this call?

This is a cell phone.

You're...
You're kidding right?

[screams]

I have to make
a Time Ape costume

by the end of the week
for drama class

and I'm way behind

because he's always
interrupting.

Hey, you notice
how I let her finish

before I sprung up there?

So I don't always
interrupt her, that's...

Hey what you
got there, Doof?

It's a Reconstitut-inator.

I bought a bunch of raisins,
I wanted grapes,

but I can't seem
to get it to work.

Hey, those are some pretty nice
Dr. Zone pajamas there.

I have limited-edition
curtains just like those.

Pretty sure you mean "had."

[Sara screams]

Wow, she sounds upset.
Here, have a muffin.

Kids like muffins.

So Dr. D, have you
got any big plans for the day?

Ah, just the usual eight hours

or so of sitting
on the couch

staring out the window.
It's a busy day.

You might want to open
the blinds this time.

Oh, I just thought
it was really beige out there!

Maybe you should go outside

and get some fresh air today.

Oh, I can't do that.

Sure you can.
You totally can!

Nope.
I'm waiting for Destiny.

I don't want to be out
when it knocks.

Destiny knocks?

Oh, wait, tha...
Maybe that's opportunity.

Opportunity knocks,
Destiny does something else.

It calls, or texts,
or it rings the doorbell,

I don't know.

Either way, I've decided
to be pro-active

in the least
active way possible

until I become
Professor Time.

But you can't just sit
and wait to do great things.

You gotta get out there
and practice!

Ehh, that sounds like, like effort.

I could take you on our
bi-weekly field trip

to the science museum.

Afterwards, I could drop you
by the animal sanctuary.

They're always
looking for volunteers.

Yeah, and then I can take you
to the power plant with me.

Nothing like
a safety inspection

to get the blood pumping.
What do you think, Doof?

Well, okay,
but if Destiny comes by,

you tell 'em where I am,
all right?

♪ He's leaving
He's leaving ♪

Oh.

♪ I'm sorry
That's rude ♪

[guide] Welcome to the human
digestive system.

Just like the small intestine
absorbs nutrients,

your young minds
will absorb

the knowledge
being imparted to you

-in this slow and deliberate tone.
-[crackles]

-Follow me to intestinal adventure.
-You know, I think

I'm just gonna
go buy some grapes.

This Reconstitut-inator,

is just too much work.

[dinosaur growls]

This is the entrance
to the alimentary canal.

Man, this guy
really makes biology...

What's the opposite
of come alive?

Go, go dead?

Basically,
he kills biology.

This looks like my old
alimentary school.

No puns.

Totally worth it.

Up here it begins

to narrow
into the esophagus,

Nature's trash can.

Uh-oh.

What's wrong?

I'm starting to feel weird
and claustro-avoidant.

Oh, lucky for you,
I've got an app for that. Here you go.

[woman on phone] Relax,
take a long deep breath,

[inhales deeply]

and hold it until
I tell you to let it out...

[muffled groaning]

-[thuds]
-Oops, sorry!

I must've hit
the pause button.

[woman on phone]
Slowly release your breath...

[gasps]

I gotta get out of here!

[panting heavily]
Where's the exit?

Where is the exit to the human
digestive system?

-Seriously?
-[whimpering]

Wait, I know how to get
out of here quickly.

All right, somebody grab
some corpuscles

and I'm gonna pry
that liver off the wall.

♪ We got four corpuscles ♪

♪ A heart and a spleen ♪

♪ We can use a little plasma
For some gasoline ♪

♪ The liver's gonna keep
The engine clean ♪

♪ Don't need to operate ♪

♪ To operate the speed machine ♪

♪ Can't stop just to ask
For directions ♪

♪ We gotta get out
Of the lower intestines ♪

♪ Gotta drive ♪

♪ We gotta drive ♪

♪ We gotta drive ♪

♪ Drive, drive ♪

♪ Drive, we gotta drive ♪

-♪ We gotta drive ♪
-[crashes]

[cheering]

[guide] All right.

Hoo! Hoo!
Hoo! Hoo?

Who's responsible for this?

Yeah, I'll, uh...

I'll see myself out.

Do you guys validate?

I'm sorry.
I ruined everything.

Maybe I should go back

to my sitting on the couch

and staring
out the window plan.

You can't!
You're better than the couch!

[Brigette] Hey Dr. D!

Are you ready to go?

All right, I'm off
to the Nature Center.

Hey, Mom, can we
swing by the store?

Gotta pick up some grapes.

[Brigette]
I'm not your mother.

[Sally] A few rules
for the newbie volunteers.

Do not touch
the animals.

They are majestic
beings with souls.

Sweet. Will there be otters?

'Cause I brought little clams
with little rocks

so that they can open them
'cause I...

I can't get them open.

The only animals
at this facility are raccoons.

You got a problem
with raccoons?

They bring back
bad memories.

Oh. It's a bear.

Huh. Well, maybe it's bears
that I'm afraid...

-[raccoon shrieking]
-[Doofenshmirtz screaming]

[Doofenshmirtz] Ow!
Ow! Ow, my spleen!

To help the raccoons
adjust to the wild,

I have recreated
their natural habitat.

[screams] He's using his hands
like people!

None of you find that
even a little bit creepy?

Look. All we do is prepare
nature's little vandals

for re-release into the wild.

Well, why didn't you say so?

I can release them
into the wild.

Run free, trash rats!

That's it! Get out of here!
There ya go!

No! Deborah Sue,
come back to me!

Shh!

[muffled screaming]

What have you done?

I released them
into the wild. What?

We gotta get
'em back inside!

In, out?
Make a decision.

Inside!

Ooh, I can help with that!

Drusselstein
herding whistle.

[rumbling]

[oinking, snorting]

They're mostly used for pigs.

Uh-oh. Pig stampede!

Run from the pigs!

-That looks wonderful, honey!
-Thanks!

Well, you don't have to worry
about Doofenshmirtz

bothering you because
he's down at the...

[cell phone rings]
Hello?

[Doofenshmirtz on phone]
I'm being chased by pigs!

-Help me!
-Doof, where are you?

I'm in the foyer!

Now I'm in the living room.

[pigs squealing]

Now I'm going
out the back door.

My costume!

[Martin] Being a safety inspector
comes with a lot of responsibility.

One small mistake could create
an enormous disaster.

With your science background,

a job at a place like this
could be exciting

and exercise that flabby greatness muscle.

-[machine trilling]
-Sounds good, Dad.

-Can I call you dad?
-No.

What's this button do?

This button here
floods the generator

with coolant in emergencies.

[loudly] It costs millions to repair,
so don't push it!

You want me to push it?

No, don't push it!

Okay, I'll push it.

No!

Don't worry.
That's the decoy button

in case anyone's
dumb enough to push it.

The real one

is next to the soda-machine
over there.

[Doofenshmirtz] No!

Oh. Heh. Well, why,

thank you.

Thank you, I'm...
[alarm blaring]

-[Doofenshmirtz] Sorry, Dad.
-[Martin] I'm not your dad.

Hey Dr. D.
What are you watching?

I don't know it's just
this sad man,

sitting on a couch,
in the dark, it's, uh...

It's just terrible.

You know the T.V.
is not on, right?

[groans]

Uh, listen.

I know you've been feeling
really bad about...

You know...

Driving you crazy and messing
things up for everyone

while failing
to become great?

Um, yeah.

I mean, it was nice
to get my costume finished,

but after a while

I, kind of, missed
your annoying presence.

Aw. That's the sweetest
mean thing

-anyone's said to me.
-[door bell rings]

Hello, Mr. Doofenshmirtz.

I'm Destiny Summers
from Channel News.

Huh! Destiny does ring
the doorbell.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz,
there's some people here

who'd like to see you.

-[screams]
-[gasps]

[Doofenshmirtz] If I can't see you,
you can't see me.

Dr. D, I think
you have it all wrong.

Listen to this.

[guide] Our Digestive
Tract Exhibit

used to be the least popular
in the museum,

but then Dr. Doofenshmirtz
made it into an exciting ride

by turning the liver
into a go-cart.

Now people are lined up
around the block.

Thank you, Dr. Doofenshmirtz.

Wow, thanks.

[whispers] But I've never gotten a
compliment that's that boring.

Since a video of the incident
you caused went viral,

we have received
thousands of donations.

Me and Deborah Sue
really want to thank you.

-Aw, think nothing of it... [screams]
-[raccoon shrieking]

[Sally] Deborah Sue
let go of him.

She must smell your raccoon.

Yeah that's...
That's probably it.

The doctor visited the plant
and caused

the generator
to be flooded.

Turns out the generator
was actually overheating

and the warning system
had failed.

You averted a possible expl*si*n

that I could have been blamed for.

We'd like to present you with the Danville
Hero of the Day Trophy.

[cheering]

Oh, wow.

I am overwhelmed.

I'm well,
maybe not overwhelmed.

Maybe I'm just the right
amount of whelmed.

I guess,
I really should thank

the Murphy family,
Milo, and Mom and Dad.

[both] Not your parents.

But mostly,
I'd like to thank Sara.

If she had not had
such a low threshold

for my eccentricities,

I'd still be wearing
her curtains

and sitting on their couch.

-It reminds me of a story...
-[music floods]

Eh, wait, what?
What, really?

You're playing me off?

All right, okay. Looks like
I'm all out of time.

Thank you, Danville.
I love you.

Group hug, Murphys.

[bushes rustle]

[growls]

Oh, thank goodness.

When I heard
those bushes rustling,

I thought it was a raccoon.

♪ It's my world
and we're all livin' in it ♪

[Brigette] Honey, terrible news.

Skate Ashbury is closing
for good this weekend.

Well, I guess we can cross
that off our dream board.

What's the End of Night
' s Style Roller

Disco Dance Competition?

-Our dream.
-Our dead dream.

I didn't know
you guys liked skating.

Well, not just skating.

We like competitive

' s-style
roller disco dancing.

-That's a thing?
-Gather round, kids.

We need to tell you a story.

Story time!
We haven't had that in a while.

[Sara] Aw, I miss story time!

Story time! I'll need graham crackers and
milk, and a blankie!

Shh!

-A long time ago...
-The ' s...

-...in a place far, far away...
-Skate Ashbury.

There was a young couple,
full of the joy

of ' s-style roller
disco dancing...

Ooh! Who were they,
what were their names?

It was us, Doof.

You and me? I have
no recollection of that.

-No not you and... Agh.
-I'm just gonna keep going.

More than anything, we wanted

to win the end-of-night skate.

[Martin] But Murphy's Law

always tripped us up, literally.

-Ouch.
-[disco music playing]

[Brigette] So we simplified
our routine,

and simplified.
And, finally, we managed

to get through it
without disaster.

[Martin] We felt confident...

[Brigette] Till we saw
who we were up against

[Martin] Pete and Tina.

The best ' s style roller disco dancers
in all of Danville.

How many roller disco dancers
were there in Danville?

Seven, but you're interrupting
the narrative. Anyway...

We skated onto the rink,
crashed into each other,

then crawled off in shame.

Oh. You should go back.

-Nope.
-No way. It's no use.

Even after four years

of ' s-style-roller-disco-
dancing-couples therapy...

So, how does this
make you feel?

Milo. Murphy's Law
plus skates does not equate.

So, that whole story
was about them?

I can't believe
that this is our life.

We're just expendable cogs
collecting alien rubbish.

-Happy Monday, boys!
-[both gasp]

How are my two favorite

refuse engineers?

You'll be happy to hear
that I have an important

new mission for you.

You'll be retrieving

adorable garden gnomes
of alien origin.

I'll send you the coordinates!

Enjoy!

-Lawn gnomes?
-At least we won't be handling garbage.

[Milo] Hey,
great news everyone.

I signed Mom and Dad up

for the final
skating competition

-at Skate Ashbury.
-[exclaims]

Honey, some people
are afraid of spiders.

Some are afraid of heights.

[both] We are afraid
of choking

at ' s-style roller
disco dancing.

You've seen our shattered
dream board, right?

Maybe, it's time
to face your fears.

I can be your coach.

I've choreographed
your routine

like I pack my backpack.

I'm preparing you
for any eventuality!

Can't we just, you know,
shimmy in place?

Do you want to lose?

-Sir, no, sir!
-No.

Ice Cream Parlor.
Dip and scoop.

Number .

The Eggbeater.

Spin Cycle.

What a charming
little cottage.

Who knew lawn gnomes
were of alien origin?

Well, not all of them.

This one appears
to be from Druesselstein.

Hm, sounds made up.

Everything's made up.

Spatula, Meringue, Cavendish.

-Touche.
-Touche.

It's all made-up words.

That's my gnome!

Hello, madam.
My name is Cavendish,

and this is my associate...
Ow!

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

[both grunting]

[both yelling]

She's terrifying.

Yeah, she reminds me of mother.

Was that your routine or did you get a bee
stuck in your underwear?

Because I've had
that happen and...

What are you doing here?

Oh, I'm one
of the judges.

I had a very popular
skating video

on the internet
a ways back.

I am a superstar.

[grunting]

So, anyhow...
But don't worry,

I'll be impartial.

Matter of fact,
I'll take a point off

just because I know you.

I am a superstar.

Now, let's just
sneak in there

and get those gnomes.

[gate creaks]

-Huh?
-My gnome!

[both grunting]

Gotta get outta here.

[vehicle beeping]

-Hi, Bummer.
-Bummer.

Martin and Brigette

blast from the past.

Oh, hey,
the same team

who b*at you
back in the day

is coming tonight
for a re-do.

Quite the co-inky-dink.
Ha-ha.

Pete and Tina?

Hey, Murphy's!

Nice outfits.

Hey, break a leg.

Ha! Yeah.

Probably!
Murphy's Law.

They're gonna destroy us!

Just to save time,
I'm gonna dial , now.

It's the first two digits
of my friend Ed's phone number.

He can drive
us to the hospital.

I'm going to hook
my belt onto this

and slide across.

When I've filled
the basket with gnomes,

I'll slide it
back to you.

I totally
have your back.

[gasps]

[Cavendish screams]

[exclaims]

-[grunts]
-My gnome!

Hey, come back here
with my pinata!

[dance music plays]

Wow.

Hey, Cameron,
check out this disco dancing.

Ian, we're here
to take inventory,

so they can sell
this stuff at auction.

Stay focused.

Huh. They are pretty good.

Whoa. That move
was so complicated.

Amazing!
This might be the most amazing

routine I've ever seen!

That anyone's ever seen.

Wow!

How did he
throw her like that

and do that twist thing,
and then catch her,

all in one motion?

Did you see that?

I don't want to see
anything else ever again.

Perfection!
This needs to be seen.

This needs to be seen
by everyone.

This should be on T.V.

[whooshing]

-Whoa! What?
-No, they didn't.

-No, they did not!
-How is that even possible?

-Mind blown.
-Mind blown.

Is that...
Is that...

Must be some sort
of super-complicated,

amazing finishing moves.

[whooshing]

-[exclaims]
-Oh, man.

Now, that is the most
amazing routine

I've ever seen!

That is the most amazing
routine of all time.

It's really a crime
against culture

that this is not on T.V.

[cheering, applauding]

You want to go
for some pizza

and feel sorry
for ourselves?

I'll get our capes.

Wait a minute.
You can't quit.

This is bigger
than winning or losing.

This is about
facing your fear!

This may be hard,
but the world

ain't all kittens
and rainbows.

Okay. Well, it's not
all kittens.

Huh. I guess it is
all kittens and rainbows.

Anyway...
As dad always says,

keep your eyes
and ears open,

and end with
the double boogie.

I do say that!
I have said that.

-I say that!
-You did,

you have,
and you do.

Let's go lose!

You know, old people
go to bed early,

so this shouldn't
take much longer.

Told ya.
Okay, so now we...

-My gnomes!
-Drive, drive,

drive!

Oh. [sighs]

[car engine revving]

[men screaming]

My gnomes!

[dance music playing]

[both] Yay!

♪ We're dancing ♪

♪ Now skating ♪

Number .

The Eggbeater.

[grunts]

[tires screeching]

[truck horn blaring]

[tires screeching]

Spin cycle.

♪ Skating ♪

♪ And dancing ♪

Hey, you got kittens in my yarn.

You got yarn
in my kittens.

[cats meowing]

Ice Cream Parlor.
Ice Cream Parlor!

No!
She's still there.

She's still there!

How did she go so fast?
She's so old! Look out!

[both screaming]

[sighs]

Well, I hope she's...

[grunting, screaming]

[clattering]

[both groan]

Is it over?

[screams]

My seatbelt.
It's stuck.

I can't get out.
Mine's stuck too.

She's coming,
she's coming.

-Oh, no!
-[whimpering]

We'll give you money
for your gnomes!

♪ Skating and dancing
Dancing and skating ♪

[crowd cheering]

-[crowd] Yay!
-Go, Mom!

[both] We did it!

You are a superstar.

I took one point off
because I knew you.

Otherwise, it would've
been a .

[Mr. Block on T.V.] Gentlemen.

I see you got the gnomes

from that sweet old lady.

Kudos!

Thank you, sir.

He paid her bucks.

So, can you tell us why the gnomes

are so valuable?

Oh, they're not valuable.

They're disgusting!

The aliens convert their waste

into gnomes,
and use Earth

as a dumping ground.

So we are sitting
on a couch

covered in alien droppings?

Is this still a step up
from garbage?

♪ It's my world
and we're all livin' in it ♪

[old lady] Mine!

♪ Go, Milo
Go, Milo, go ♪

♪ Oh, thanks, everybody
That is so motivational ♪

♪ Go, Milo
Go, Milo, go ♪

♪ Whoa ♪

♪ I'm not sitting here
Watching the world turn ♪

♪ You know
I'd rather spin it ♪

♪ Go, Milo
Go, Milo, go ♪

♪ It's my world
And we're all livin' in it ♪